Cradle of Blood
by Sagakure
Summary: AU. Ten years after the vampires lost the war, the world is ruled by the hunter supremacy and vampires are only kept alive to serve as pleasure slaves in brothels. Everyday is a nightmare for Kaname, until he meets a certain silver-haired hunter… ZxK KxZ
1. It’s all tears

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 1 – It's all tears.**_

_**  
**__**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own Vampire Knight, this is a fanfic written for fun and for love of the series. I'm not making any money with it._

_**Pairings: **__**Zero x Kaname**__. Also some Kaname x Zero.  
Secondary: some Ichiru x Shizuka and various other pairings later on. (Yaoi and het.)_

_**Warning: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes. Hurt/comfort, so be prepared for the Hurt as well as the Comfort... ^^;  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
_

_Lemons later on._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

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The two hunters stood in the dimly lit street, among the falling snowflakes that turned to mud as soon as they hit the uneven ground of the old stone paved street.

The older man had a vaguely inebriated look on his unshaved face, and nudged knowingly the silver-haired young one, pointing at the display window they were looking at, and making vulgar comments from time to time, in a way that embarrassed the other rather than helped him choose.

This was hunter territory, but by far not one of the most illustrious areas.

It was one of the districts farther away from the headquarters, an area that mixed over-the-top shops trying to look like they came straight out of the better areas –and often failing at the attempt-- with seedy old buildings that seemed out of place even there, in what was called in the common tongue the _"blood district"_.

The hunter cities, originally small and far apart, had exponentially grown during the war and even more immediately after the end of it, and those initially sparse areas had started popping up with lightening speed in the aftermath of the last battles.  
They were nothing more than red light districts, but the more grudgeful among the hunters had insisted on the 'blood district' term until it ended up being adopted by everybody.

It was a reminder of what the ones locked behind those display windows were.

All the _merchandise_ carried in those 'houses' –mere brothels-- was composed of the defeated side of the war.

The silver haired hunter staring at the display window, a young man named Zero, from the notorious Kiryuu family, looked like he was still almost a boy, but despite his delicate features he visibly had the strength of one who had lived much already, and he was undeniably a full-fledged hunter.  
He didn't really have that much interest in the area they were in, but ever since his coming-of-age, the others at the headquarters just wouldn't leave him alone, harping on and on that he would only truly be a hunter and a man once he'd gone to the blood district at least once, so he was determined to get the stupid tradition finally done and over with.

The older man was a long time acquaintance of the boy's master and was said to know the area like the palm of his hand, so he had tagged along to chaperone the young hunter, at the demand of his master, who was vaguely concerned about some of the shops' practices with poor quality _merchandise_ or extortive prices.

But much as the silver haired hunter had been decided to just go, pick the first shop that didn't look too dirty, choose the first vampire who didn't look too creepy and get it over with, now that he was there on the spot, things seemed more difficult.

He was a hunter and had grown up to believe that vampires were inferior creatures, beasts who deserved nothing more than a violent end, generally in the form of a merciful bullet through the head, but witnessing the display of their life of servitude was a shocking sight, and dampened his resolve. His gaze wandered over the display window of the shop in front of which he stood, where several of them sat on various chairs and fauteuils, metal and leather restraints holding them in place in an obvious manner.  
Not that they had anywhere to run to anyway, or even the strength to try – no one took chances since the war, any act of rebellion was crushed instantly with a brutal determination and captive vampires were permanently drugged and/or restrained with charms. It made them more docile, and it completely cut off any chances of fighting or escaping.

"Go ahead, pick one of 'em and then you can do to him whatever you feel like for the night. It's not as if they were people, anyway! They're just filthy vampires. That's what they're for!"

"Uhhm, I know, but it still seems wrong. They sure _look_ like people."

_If they look so human, who's to say they don't feel pain and shame the way humans do?_

"Oh _come_ _on!_ It's always been this way, there's nothing wrong with it. They're blood-sucking beasts, they should be grateful we even bother keeping 'em alive for this, after they lost the war and all. It's all they exist for, so don't take away their reason to be, 'kay?"

The old man had a sarcastic edge in his voice, visibly shocked by Zero's hesitation, but he was perfectly serious and deeply believed what he was saying. It was a commonly accepted belief these days, to the point where most grew used to just taking it for the simple truth, and never bothered questioning this status quo or imagining a world where vampires weren't slaves kept alive for sexual service.

"But the war ended ten years ago… Sometimes I can't help but wonder if it's really fair to still have things that way."

The older hunter scoffed, apparently finding Zero's idealistic musings absolutely hilarious.

"Boy, you're still _real_ young. You'll change your mind with time. But really, they almost never get diseases, their bodies heal amazingly fast, and with their looks and all it's like they were born for this, for our use. We're doing nothing more than what nature intended, and anyways it's still better than what those bloodsuckers deserve to begin with! Now just go in there and pick one, you might already be seeing things differently in the morning."

Zero didn't reply; his gaze was lost on the farther end of the display window, where a dark haired vampire sat on a Louis XV armchair, with a regal look about him that set him distinctly apart from all the others, despite the way his wrists and neck were bruised and his legs were held forcefully apart, chained at the knees and ankles to the chair to present a more lewd display for the potential customers making up their mind about whom to choose.

The young hunter hadn't been sure of what to choose – hunters made little to no distinction of sex when it came to vampires, as the vampire beauty made that males were just as appealing, and since they were not considered the way humans were, there wasn't really a moral compass to point a finger at anyone choosing a vampire of their same sex.  
But that one vampire definitely caught his eye. If he was going to have to go through with this stupid thing for the sake of tradition, he might as well pick one who looked like he might provide an experience worth his while.

The older hunter patted him on the back proudly as he walked into the shop, then went about to make a choice as well.

--

Zero waited by the marble counter of the check-in area. The houses worked very much like a hotel with a vague allure of a tea house, in which you would check in for a room and then take with you your choice of entertainment for the evening, the length of your stay depending on what you decided to do.

Zero had filled in the customary little form, and the older woman who had checked him in came back tugging a thin silver chain in her hand. It was a leash, at the end of which stood the dark haired vampire that Zero had seen on the window. The leash attached to a thick leather collar tight around his neck, with various d-shaped rings around it for it to be secured onto other chains if necessary. There were similar restraints on the vampire's wrists and ankles, and he wore what looked like a very summary bondage outfit, the leather tighter than necessary, either to be more revealing or to cause an additional discomfort.

"This one, sir?"

Her sickeningly sugary smile and voice were somewhat unsettling from someone who basically sold lives, or at least the bodies of enslaved vampires for a night or a few hours.  
The hunter nodded in silence and dropped some gold coins on the counter, paying the advance fee for the night before reaching for the chain.

"Excellent choice, sir! And we just had his fangs taken out recently, so if I may recommend, the mouth should be ideal right now, still sensitive and a bit raw."

She spouted the line out with a wink and a little laugh, as if she was confiding in something amusing, or innocently suggesting a particularly good dish, before turning around to lavish another sickeningly sweet smile on a new customer who had just walked in.

Zero shuddered lightly at the coldness with which those people seemed to dish out lives, even if vampire ones, and let his gaze wander over the vampire he had chosen. There was a light flush on his delicate features, and his eyes were resolutely locked on the floor, avoiding the customer's, a vaguely dead look in his gaze, from what little the hunter could see between the dark hair that spilled over the vampire's face. Apparently, ten years wasn't enough to stop feeling the sting of humiliation when hearing something like that told to your face.

In a quick movement, the woman turned back towards them and snapped her fingers harshly. The noise quickly jolted the vampire's head back up, and he bowed slightly, before turning around to show the customer to his room.

--

The room was lavish to say the least. The young hunter hadn't expected that from the outside look of the shop. It wasn't bad, but it didn't strike him as an establishment to have such a room.  
The furnishings were luxurious to the point that the hunter wondered if they had been taken straight off one of the great vampire mansions that were sacked and pillaged as the war ended. That would explain why everything in the room was so harmonious and beautiful, albeit looking a little worn down.  
Could he have inadvertently chosen a vampire who was formerly from one of the higher ranks? Not that it would make any difference. They were all equal now, all slaves and no better than objects or worse in the eyes of the hunters. Although Zero still wasn't sure whether it was fair to treat them all that way, and his hesitation made him unsure of what to do next now that they were in the room.

He awkwardly settled for small talk for the time being.

"So they tear off your fangs, huh?"

The vampire had been staring at the ground, waiting for the customer to make the first move, and was vaguely startled by the voice. He wasn't used to anyone speaking to him that way. Normally, customers talked to the handlers only, not bothering to acknowledge the vampires more than for short commands or insults. The hunters didn't like speaking to them, because that would mean that they were sentient beings…

The vampire almost wasn't sure whether he was expected to reply or not, but took his chance and spoke.

"Uhm. Yes. They do it again every so often, because the fangs regrow faster on purebloods."

"You're a pureblood?!"

He should have known, maybe, but it was rather hard to tell with the vampire's power being so dulled by the drugs and charm-restraints. And Zero had never met a pureblood in person before or after the war, so he hadn't had the occasion to get a feel of how different they were.

"I thought you knew? Usually that's the reason why people pick me."

The vampire wasn't sure what it was about this customer that made him less wary, but there was definitely something, a strange impression making him feel less in danger, almost free to speak without having to worry that he might be backhanded any moment for daring to open his mouth to speak when not ordered to.

Maybe it was just that this hunter had never come to the houses before, and wasn't used to the local traditions yet. Any other customer would already have him on his knees by now, or on the bed, but this one was just staring at the room and talking of random things without giving him any orders or shoving him around. But it was best to be wary, in case the young hunter was not as inexperienced as he seemed, and was just toying around. Some of the younger ones were among the most overzealous in displaying cruelty towards vampires, and he didn't particularly feel like inadvertently inviting a beating when his jaw was already throbbing so badly from the brutal fang removal that morning. The drugs significantly hampered vampire healing, so the pain would probably last several more days before it started to be less bad.

A vague shudder of distaste ran through Zero's body at the idea that the vampire he chose was a pureblood, but it disappeared just as quickly.  
A pureblood had killed his parents. But the hunters had also massacred so many vampires during the war… So much blood had been spilled already. Both sides had taken a heavy toll, and all in all, Zero was fair enough in his judgment to feel that it wouldn't be right to blame someone for a crime committed by another just because they were from the same species. He hated vampires as a collective and might have felt otherwise if the vampire he was talking to had been in any position of power, but he still had enough innocence in his heart to not feel like turning the force of that hatred towards the bruised figure in front of him.  
He disguised his reaction instead with the other thing he'd been thinking, in his surprise.

"I thought purebloods were practically all prized pets of the rich and fortunate?"

The vampire's gaze lost itself on the ground, an unreadable look taking over his features for a fraction of a second.

"It is often the case. I didn't have such… _luck_."

The hunter eyed him with surprise, slightly taken aback, and the vampire felt worry growing within him, thinking that perhaps he had said too much and would be punished for speaking. But instead, the hunter simply changed the subject, explaining instead his reason for picking him.

"I liked your eyes."

The vampire had a distinct something that set him apart from all the others and had inevitably caught Zero's attention, but it was those impressive garnet tinted eyes that had fully convinced him.

"Oh… They're a Kuran feature."

The pureblood kept up the conversational tone that the hunter had set up, but a shiver had ran through his slender body the moment he heard Zero's words.

_Please don't pluck them out, please don't pluck them out._

The last customer who praised his eyes did exactly that, just out of pointless cruelty. They healed, naturally, but that didn't mean that it wasn't terribly painful and frightening all the same.

But this customer didn't seem to have any intention to do so, luckily.

Instead, Zero continued asking questions.

"Kuran? Your clan?"

"My… family. I lived with my parents, before the war."

He lived also with his sister, but he wasn't about to mention her. She was the very only one of them whom they had managed to hide and who might have a chance of survival in this upturned world. He would never mention her name to anyone.  
She was human now, and it would be best if she never even knew he existed, so that at least she would have a chance of happiness. He wouldn't hesitate to pay for it with his life if he had to.

Zero's next question, pulled him out of his musings quickly.

"What's your name?"

The surprise was such that the vampire almost stared openly at first, but he quickly caught himself, expecting it to be a test, and lowered his head submissively, mumbling out words he hated but was much too used to.

"I have no name. I'm nothing more than a slave that lives only for your pleasure, lord."

His voice was even, but in striking contrast with the hesitant and more alive way it had sounded a moment before, when he was actually talking of his own accord. This sentence had been said in a monochord tone that sounded dead, one of a broken spirit too used to repeating those words he'd been forced to memorize.

The young hunter was shocked, and automatically refused that answer.

"What? Everyone has a name."

"Not us. We're vampires. We lost our names in the war."

"But you're older than the war. You must have had a name before?"

The vampire dared raise his eyes now, unsure of the reason why the hunter insisted so, but definitely puzzled by how different he was from all the other customers.

It was Zero's turn to be taken aback by the depth of those despair filled reddish eyes. The glance of them he'd had while the vampire was in display had been enough to convince him to pick this one, but he hadn't seen yet just how deeply sad and desperate he looked.

"Is this… some sort of test? I am not allowed a name." _And as a hunter, there's no way you don't know that._

Even without saying the thought that passed through his mind, the simple statement alone could be taken for rebellious talking back and earn him a severe beating, but something told him that the silver haired man in front of him wouldn't do that.

"No test. And since I paid for you, you're mine for a night, so I say you have a name, and I want to know it."

_This one was definitely different! _

The vampire would have almost smiled in amusement if not for the horror of the world he lived in constantly, and the inevitable reminder of it in the words of the hunter.

"Kaname. It's Kaname Kuran."

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_[tbc…]_

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_So, at long last I've relented to my Muses' constant poking, and have decided to start posting this AU after all. :D_

_  
I started writing it in early september, but have been terribly busy for a while and wasn't sure yet when I would finally post it.  
It's one of my favorites of the fic ideas I've had so far (there's so many waiting to be written...^^;), so I wanted to wait until I had more time to write it regularly, but seeing how busy I currently am and might stay for a while, chances are that if I keep waiting forever I'll never do it, so I decided to just go and start posting it despite being busy. XD;_

_**If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,** it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
Zero still grew up among hunters, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and was never turned into a vampire, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:** take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons, although I don't know yet if the ages will be AU to be older back at the time of the war or not.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

_  
I'm not sure yet of the rate of updating I'm going to go for, because on one side I want to update it as often as possible, and on the other side I'm crushed under deadlines and terribly busy at the moment, so it's a constant struggle to find a little moment to write. XD;  
That and the fact I have various other fics I also want to write. :D  
But hopefully you'll enjoy the fic whenever I can update. ^__^/*crosses fingers*  
*will try to keep updating regularly, hopefully without making the wait between chapters too too long (Well, hopefully)* XD;  
_

_The title of the fic itself is a random idea that crawled out of my strange mind. *lol*  
I thought the feel of it fit the fic, so there it is. It has nothing to do with any bands or music. Perhaps the title comes from a vague Silent Hill influence (totally unrelated to the plot XD), but it has nothing to do at all with the game either. *lol* XD _

_The title of chapter 1 on the other hand, is from a song by HIM, a band which has some awesome music I like to listen to while writing or drawing VK stuff. (You might know them, as they are the band who did "Vampire Heart". :D)_


	2. Under the Rose

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 2 – Under the Rose.  
Pairings: **__**Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**Warnings: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes. Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
__Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_Lemons in later chapters.  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_I'll be posting the review replies in my forum, in the "Cradle of Blood review replies" topic. ^^/  
You can find it and see when new replies have been added to it by clicking on my profile._

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After a few more minutes of small talk, which felt a lot longer than they really were due to how awkward their talk was, with the hunter not knowing what to ask and the pureblood not sure what he was expected or allowed to answer, Zero ended up feeling slightly stupid from his hesitation, and reminded himself of what he'd intended to do by coming to this place after all.

_Geez, the guys at the headquarters would really laugh their asses off if they saw me beating around the bushes like that._

Things were supposed to be simple, cleanly cut out and easy to do. He just had to go to one of the 'houses', pick one of the bloodsuckers, and fuck him. Then the idiots back at the association would stop calling him cherry boy and claiming they were men and he wasn't. The stupid tradition would be over and done with. It was simple, it was easy, and heck, the bloodsucker was damn good-looking, so there should be no problem at all. _Right?_

_So why did it suddenly seem so wrong? _

Why did he look at the vampire's bruised skin and suddenly feel like some sort of rapist at the idea of touching him too? _It was supposed to be a whore, for crap's sake, the customer shouldn't have to feel guilty!_!

Zero was a bit more of a moderate, among the hunters. He accepted the way society was, and hated the vampires in general simply because that was how he was brought up and how he was used to think, but he was far from the majority of the hunters, who still held such a grudge from the war that they didn't consider the sexual service enough, and took a sadistic delight in humiliating the slaves, or in some more extreme cases relishing in causing them much more pain than necessary, for the sole sake of enjoying that torture and the vampires' helplessness.

But regardless of his more moderate tendencies, Zero was also a normal hunter, who'd grown up surrounded by people who believed the saying_ "vampires were only left alive for this, so they better get on their back and earn their right to live",_ people who believed this to be perfectly normal.

The few times Zero had mused aloud about how perhaps, just perhaps, the sexual abuse and torture etc. weren't exactly necessary, his master was mortified to hear him and quickly told him to keep such dangerous ideas secret. The Hunter Association took no chances, and pro-vampire-rights activists were all watched closely. Few were the ones in this day and age who still dared to militate for the cessation of the mistreatments of slaves, or even worse, for the extension of human rights to the vampires as well.

Zero didn't have to worry about being flagged as a potential traitor, since he was far from being outspoken on the subject. He occasionally mused aloud about the more extreme issues, but usually merely when talking to his master or close friends.  
He may be idealistic, but the young hunter knew enough to not go out of his way to speak much on the subject publicly, and was nowhere near the more open cases, the ones that were actually under the scrutiny of the Association for their unpopular opinions.

But more discreet or not, he was still young and had a future ahead. His master and the few friends to whom he felt close enough that he'd occasionally voice such ideas were always quick to disapprove severely and to remind him of the horrible damage he could do to his career if someone were to overhear him and assume he might be what the Association called with disdain and disgust "vampire sympathizers".

His master would always tell the story of his old friend Kaien Cross, born of one of the most renowned vampire hunter clans and a hero of the war, who was at one point even considered for the position of Association President… and who was now practically cut off completely from the Hunter Association, shunned by all of the polite society and avoided even by his own friends, no one daring to approach him by fear that his stigma would be contagious if someone saw them with him. The man was nicknamed "the vampire without fangs", and was now on his way to growing old alone but for his adopted daughter and a few foolish fellow activists who militated for the same cause and were as doomed as him, pariahs at the eyes of the Hunter Association and by extension at the eyes of everybody, since the whole world was now very much controlled by the Association.

The times when the civilian population was kept unaware of the existence of vampires and hunters was long gone with the war. Nowadays, you were either a hunter or close to them, but there wasn't room in society for anything else.

Vampires were all either kept in the 'houses' –nothing more than brothels—or were private slaves, usually belonging to the more wealthy hunters, when they didn't belong to prostitution rings outside of the houses.

The world had turned upside down, and much like in times long gone the vampire aristocracy held ex-humans as slaves, it was now the turn of mankind to enslave the vampires, as a whole rather than only one rank. Ironically, the humans could be as ruthless or more than the vampires had once been.

This was how the world was set up, these days. There was no way around it, and Zero hadn't known a different world, other than the torn up world at war prior to it, which hardly offered an example to compare with.

In fact, with the way he was brought up and the people that surrounded him, especially his colleagues at the Association Headquarters, it was rather amazing that he didn't turn out like so many hunters, who took quite a delight in inflicting pain on the ones they viewed as "an inferior race who didn't really deserve to even live, other than to serve them."

It was only some sort of deep instinctual kindness that made Zero look at the pureblood in front of him and think that _this_ vampire's situation seemed unfair. And even then, the little voice in his mind that was used to how society was set up told him he was overreacting about the brothels, and that vampires were nothing more than beasts disguised as humans, so there shouldn't be anything wrong with using them for pleasure. That same little voice told him that the pureblood was lucky enough to be in a place like this rather than in one of the even seedier places, and that there was no reason to feel bad about doing to him what he was kept alive for, after all.  
But when Zero looked at the bluish bruises around the vampire's wrists and here and there over his delicate features, or when he remembered the look of misery when their eyes met, or the shameful display the vampires were forced onto in the window… the voice of his conscience spoke much louder than that tempting little voice.

Zero was inevitably shocked by it all. It didn't mater that he was used to the idea of how things were set up, he couldn't help but find it shocking.  
Thinking about such things as an abstract concept or seeing it from a distracted eye as they passed by the windows of brothels was one thing. Seeing it up close and talking to one of the captives, hearing him say that he had a family and a life before the war… it made it all so much more real and tragic, so terribly far from the abstract concept of beasts that could be used for pleasure without guilt. Perhaps that was one of the reasons why the slaves were not allowed to keep their names nor to speak without being ordered… it depersonalized them and made the whole act much colder and more of a guilt-free moment for the ones taking advantage of them.

The hunter snapped out of his reverie, realizing how far it was going, and felt completely stupid now. What would his friends think if they saw him hesitating so much even after he'd already paid and was in the room with the vampire?! _They'd never believe the weird surge of unexpected scruples, they'd think he was chickening out for sure… he would never hear the end of it._

He wondered, perhaps he really was just having a momentary instant of hesitation. He had never had sex with a vampire before, and first times of anything in life were always a bit weird after all, especially out of the blue like that. It was so strange to be here.

He was far from lacking in sexual drive in any manner – at his age, it was quite the opposite, actually. In fact, he hadn't chosen that vampire only for his eyes… the pureblood's luscious body had also caught Zero's attention right away, back in the display window, and he had distinctly felt the familiar feeling of his pants becoming too tight at the sight of the dark haired pureblood's bare skin.

'_It's a sin to be so beautiful'… It's what the older hunters say of the bloodsuckers after all… that the vampires were created by nature to serve as pleasure slaves, hence their unreal beauty, conveniently nocturnal habits and overly sensitive bodies… Everybody says it's the right order of things after all…_

Yes, he just had to remind himself of that a bit more to get over the initial hesitation, and then he was pretty sure that the experience itself would be mind-blowing, if the vampire's sensual appearance was any indication of how good in bed he might be.  
_Master Yagari and the others were right after all, vampires were nothing but beasts. It was stupid to think of human terms such as rape and abuse when it came to bloodsuckers instead of humans, what was he thinking?_

The whole purpose of coming here was to get over the stupid tradition, so technically, he didn't really _have_ to do anything: It wasn't as if anyone had conversations with vampires, so there was no risk of anyone finding out even if he didn't do anything tonight.  
However, Zero was a hot-blooded young male, and the sight of the nearly naked body offered before him made him_ even more_ hot-blooded in those male areas of his anatomy... If only the stupid scruples making him feel that this was wrong could let go for a moment, he would quite happily push the vampire down onto the bed and forget completely about having ever had any hesitations.

Holding onto that idea to quench his conscience's foolish worries, the hunter gestured briefly for the vampire to undress – if taking off what little he was wearing could actually be called undressing—and begun to remove his own coat and shirt, feeling strangely out of place getting naked in that luxurious unknown room.

Kaname complied, with a graceful efficiency born of years of inevitability and forced servitude.  
Over the years, he'd found that resisting -- or even trying to be slower so that it would delay the inevitable— achieved nothing but land him in much more pain than it was necessary. The handlers had often demonstrated with abundant amounts of brutality that he had no choice over anything in his life, and that resigning himself to the idea that his body didn't belong to himself was the only way to hope for a chance to suffer a little less… Not that Kaname could ever truly resign himself to such an idea, but he was very good at playing the game and looking that way to escape unnecessary punishment.

The pureblood was well used to suffering by now, and could have shrugged off the beatings for the sake of his long-gone pride, but far beyond the simple physical pain that he could always try to partially block out from his mind, beyond even whatever the handlers from this 'house' could possibly do to him, there were also much deeper reasons why he wanted to avoid getting into too much trouble. Reasons as dark and old as the war itself, and of which to this day he wasn't free yet. Maybe nothing could ever free him from it, after all.

The pureblood was naked in a matter of moments, and went to pull off the coverlet to reveal an inviting bed with sheets of a soft yellow color and satiny pillows. It was a canopy bed, draped with curtains of the same color than the sheets, and matching the room's elegant furnishings.

Zero eyed the large four-poster and felt tempted to ask the vampire if that had been his bed before the war. He suspected it could be the case, but ended up abandoning the question, simply motioning for the vampire to get on the bed, before climbing onto it himself once he removed his shoes and pants. The pureblood obeyed in silence, efficient and quick, visibly used to it. He kept his eyes cast down, waiting for the next command, his mask of perfect composure firmly in place, betraying nothing of the worry that run close beneath the surface, more so than usual when it came to such an unpredictable customer.

With a more _'normal'_ customer, things were much easier. They knew what they wanted, and usually they wanted it fast, especially the younger ones who weren't always willing to pay for more time than the bare necessary, and thus didn't want to waste a minute.  
Most would order the pureblood with brief but direct commands, or not even bother speaking to him at all, and simply grab him by an arm or by his collar and shove him onto the bed or bent over on the nearest piece of furniture, before kicking his legs apart for a quick one.

On the contrary, this customer was so hesitant that it was almost more unsettling than the usual ones, for Kaname. Because unlike with a great part of the others, he had no idea of what to expect from this one, and that left him off balance and terribly nervous, afraid that the hunter's hesitant exterior was but a façade to lure him into falling for some trick or another.  
Like with much of how life had been in the vampire society –albeit for completely different reasons-- knowing how to read the person in front of you allowed you to plan your strategy and minimize how hurt you might be. Kaname couldn't read this hunter, and that worried him considerably.  
The pureblood opted for the customary half-sitting half-kneeling on the bed, head slightly bent forward to indicate submission, while stealing glances at the hunter as he climbed onto the bed, to see if he made any gesture to indicate he wanted him to do something.

The pureblood hated those moments, the instants before a customer let him know what to do. He hated them perhaps almost as much as the moment when people were actually touching him.

The touches were still loathsome, even so many years later –he had long lost any illusions of ever getting used to it, even if he'd also felt a certain misplaced pride in knowing he didn't completely break after all, despite how close to it he'd been over so many years. For a while, everything had been so overwhelmingly unbearable that he'd feared he'd eventually change completely to survive it, and lose himself in the process. But regardless of how much he'd been forced to adapt and how many compromises he'd done to survive, he somewhat hadn't completely lost track of who he was. He wanted to believe that a small part of him was still how he was so many years ago. That despite all those huge pieces of himself that he'd lost –his self-respect, for example—, deep inside, there was still a part of him that was whole, asleep in that rapidly diminishing little box garden hidden deep within the recesses of his mind, where he'd store his memories of his sister and their parents. A place untouched even by the rapes and the brutality of the world he was forced to live in now.

And having that little safe haven that his mind could escape to in the rare moments when he was alone allowed him to go on, the rest of the time, and to hide the intense hatred and disgust he felt for that whole world, under the mask of submissive surrender that he was forced to show the handlers as well as the customers.

Naked but for the thick leather collar around his neck and the shackles on his wrists and ankles, the pureblood made an even more appealing sight than before. Not that the bondage outfit he'd been wearing left much to imagination –it was simple and made more to reveal than hide--, but the dark leather marred the perfect paleness of his body, and seeing him naked was even more pleasing to the eye, his beauty an image of complete perfection only altered by a few bruises and the brand he sported, a taming mark imbued with a restraining charm, which the hunters placed on all vampires as an extra precaution, so that a simple command with the right technique could render them incapable of moving, making rebelling nearly impossible even if the vampires weren't already drugged.  
On the pureblood, the taming mark was on his inner left thigh, which rather made the mark appear more sensual than it might have looked elsewhere on his body. Everything with this vampire seemed geared towards the pleasures of the flesh, even more so than with other slaves Zero had seen in the past. Either because the pureblood was made to be that way by the years at the 'house', or because he was naturally sexy and everything around him took on that characteristic.

The hunter ran his eyes up the pureblood's slender frame, taking in the graceful features and each particularly attractive detail, such as his semi-parted knees, his pale inner-thighs and well-formed length –however much Zero's conscious thoughts had refused to register that detail--, his flat stomach, and the delicate but toned chest with slightly flushed nipples. The leather from the bondage gear he'd just removed must have been rubbing uncomfortably there, bruising the delicate nubs into a pinky semi-erect state. Zero's eyes finally managed to tear themselves from the inviting sight to finally travel up the pale neck encased in a heavy leather collar, and admire the pureblood's almost androgynous face, tempting lips semi-parted, inviting and sensual to the point that the hunter's arousal reacted to the sight of them right away, a spike of heat shooting straight through it and making it harden even more than it already had while he admired the rest of the pureblood's beautiful body.

So it really was as everybody said, the vampires' beauty –even more so that of a pureblood-- was such that male or female made no difference whatsoever... Although hunters in general would say it was because both males and females were equally beasts and so it didn't matter, while at the moment Zero was more inclined to think it was because Kaname was so utterly gorgeous in that manly beauty that was still distinctly delicate to the point of androgyny, that he couldn't bring himself to care in the least that the vampire was male. The pureblood's ethereal beauty made it easy to forget that. The hunter had never felt any attraction for members of the same sex before, but Kaname's beauty, with that pale and smooth skin, flushed lips and long eyelashes over sultry bedroom eyes, was in some ways a little closer to the human image of a more delicate beauty anyway, so Zero didn't give any second thought to the fact that the vampire was also definitely very male, a fact that was perfectly visible between his parted thighs.

Truth to be said, at the present moment Zero couldn't really focus much on anything other that the thought of getting those lips to wrap around his arousal --which was now very urgently throbbing.  
But the moment he was about to tell the pureblood to do just that, he suddenly remembered the woman's words earlier, assuring him that the mouth would be 'particularly pleasant to use' due to them having recently torn out the vampire's fangs, making the area slightly swollen and more sensitive.

Sure, it would probably be very pleasurable for himself, but it would also be painful for the pureblood, as he must still be aching from the fangs torn out.

Zero realized now that Kaname's lips were perhaps so appealing and flushed _precisely_ because of it, either because his mouth was still raw from the tearing, or perhaps even because other customers before him had been following the woman's advice and _"enjoying the treat"_ regardless of the additional pain they'd be causing him.

Zero couldn't help but ask, partially for confirmation and partially perhaps out of some sort of fool's hope that he was wrong.

"I suppose you don't want it in the mouth…?"

The pureblood was just waiting for the hunter's orders to know in what position he wanted him, and was taken aback by the question enough that he hesitated for a second, before attempting to give a standard canned reply which vampires were expected to provide. "What I want doesn't matters. I live-"

"Yeah, yeah. You said that. But your mouth is hurting, isn't it? That old harpy downstairs seemed delighted by that idea, in fact."

The expletive was unexpected, and Kaname's cheeks colored lightly as he did his best to control the urge to laugh at the way the hunter had called the handler at the check-in counter. It was exactly how the pureblood called her inside his mind, although of course, saying it aloud would get him in a world of trouble. He was caught off-balance by the unexpected humor in the middle of a moment where he'd been expecting the worst to happen anytime now, trying to still himself to not let the dread show on his face.

He was also considerably surprised that the hunter would seem to care at all whether it would hurt or not –usually, if someone ever asked him if something hurt, it was in order to cause him _additional_ pain, not in order to minimize it.

"I… In truth, other parts of my body hurt just as much, but it's not as if I have a choice anyway. Please just do as you wish… I'm used to it anyway. It won't change anything."

That resigned determination permeated with misery shook the hunter to the core. The vampire's voice was subdued, spoken in a soft low tone that could have passed for sultry if it didn't carry so much despair that it was almost trembling.

Instinctively, the hunter reached with a hand, and the vampire stilled a flinch, expecting a blow at first, and then obediently forcing himself to remain calm as he received the contact, once he realized the hunter just wanted to touch his face.

Zero ran his fingers gently along the pureblood's cheekbone, sliding upwards until his fingertips lost themselves into the surprisingly silky chocolate-brown locks, almost mesmerized by how soft and pleasant to the touch they felt. The vampire shuddered, terribly unsettled, not used to being touched gently and unsure of what to expect next. All his instincts screamed at him that the hunter would hurt him badly any time soon. Why else would he be caressing him, if not to further lure him into the dangerous belief that he was safe? And he'd experienced unexpected beatings for no reason much too often to not automatically tense, any second passing making him feel like the violence was closer.

But Zero meant only to caress him in a reassuring manner, and didn't quite understand why the vampire was getting more and more nervous. He pulled back his hand, and watched as the pureblood's naturally tense look seemed to loosen up a slight bit.

Zero finally noticed that the pureblood had his arms close to his body on each side of himself, fingers tightly gripping the bedsheets in an attempt to hold onto something and conceal the fact that his hands were shaking ever so slightly, the trembling worsening when the hunter got closer.

If there was something Zero could never imagine himself being, it was a rapist. Desire or not, traditions or not, to hell with the deeply established ideas of the society he'd grown up in, he was quite sure that this was so terribly, utterly wrong, and that the creature in front of him was a sentient being with feelings and fears. He might not be human, he might be a beast like everybody said, but he still didn't deserve to be raped like this.

Maybe he'd terribly regret it later once he'd paid the bill and seen all the money he wasted on paying for a night where he hadn't even touched the vampire, but at the present moment, Zero couldn't bring himself to order the pureblood to give himself to him.

.

.

_[tbc…]_

* * *

_Another title from a song by HIM. XD *really likes some of their songs*_

_The chapter is a bit of a build-up since they've just met, but hopefully things will get interesting soon... ;D  
Sorry for no lemony activities in this chapter but... who knows what the next one holds in stock... *hint-hint, nudge-nudge* XD *lol*_

_A part of me is terribly tempted to make all my chapters longer, but considering how I barely have time to update as it is, that would be rather impractical… so perhaps it's better if I stick to those shorter chapters updating more or less regularly whenever possible, rather than super long chapters updated rarely. XD;;;  
I managed to find time and update sooner than I expected though~! :D (Well, I had this chapter already written ahead a while ago, so it was just tweaking and adding stuff, hence why it was faster... XD)  
*was thinking of updating once a week, but might do more often if she can find a moment, or less often if things are too busy*_

_**NOTE**__**:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,**__ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
Zero still grew up among hunters, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and was never turned into a vampire, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__ take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons, although I don't know yet if the ages will be AU to be older back at the time of the war or not.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	3. So open your arms

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 3 – So open your arms.  
**__**Pairings: Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**Warnings: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and **lemons from time to time**.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_I'll be posting the review replies in my forum, in the "Cradle of Blood review replies" topic. ^^/  
You can find it and see when new replies have been added to it by clicking on my profile.  
(I'll add replies to the previous chapters with each new chapter as well.)_

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When the hunter had motioned for him to lay down on the bed, Kaname had been certain that it would be like each of the other times, so he was understandably amazed when the man didn't touch him.

Instead, they just laid down side by side, propped on a small mountain of pillows, and stared at the ceiling for what felt like an eternity.  
Zero went on making awkward small talk, to which Kaname replied as best as he could, despite not being used to being talked to, and not knowing much of current news or what went on outside.  
It had been so long since he last had an actual conversation with anyone, as most of the time customers and handlers simply gave him orders and strongly discouraged talking. He felt stupid for his awkward silences and moments of hesitation, which he would normally never have had years ago, when he was used to talking freely and maneuvering the words with ease.  
The throbbing in his jaw was also making things harder, causing his speech to become slurred and slower as the pain grew.

At last, Zero noticed, and told him to not worry and just be silent. The pureblood still couldn't guess what may be the hunter's intentions, but he obeyed readily, relieved to be able to let his jaw to rest a little.

"If the fangs regrow slowly, what happens while they're not there?"

Inevitable morbid curiosity of youth. _What does it looks like, a pureblood vampire without his fangs?_

Kaname saw the curiosity in the hunter's eyes and complied to the unspoken order, opening his mouth and then raising his fingers to his face to slightly pull back his lips, revealing his teeth and the torn bloody holes where the fangs would normally have been. Two on top and two on the bottom, as the handlers tore off both the fangs and the sharp lower canines as well, for safety purposes. The wounds were still slowly oozing blood out, reddening the vampire's saliva and the rest of his teeth.

The hunter felt a pang of sympathy at the sight of the bloodied holes, and couldn't help but ask.

"If you had fresh blood, would the pain lessen?"

He knew that enslaved vampires were given the blood of criminals or, more often, of lower rank vampires who also lived in slavery but lacked the appeal necessary to be in the front windows. But they were given the bare minimum in as rare and far apart occasions as possible, to keep them weakened and drained at all times. The drugs slowed down the vampires' natural healing rate, so they usually had to be given blood more often when they were badly wounded, but the rest of the time they barely ever got any if they weren't hurt enough for it to be an inconvenience for the house.

"It would… but it's not going to happen anyway."

The pureblood knew well that he had little chance of being given any blood unless he was wounded enough that he couldn't work.

Zero had a most strange urge, which went against all his instincts and the very most basic notions he had ever been taught as a hunter._ What was it about __**this**__ vampire that was so compelling, and that gave him this most peculiar urge to try and ease his pain a little?!_

For anyone to offer their blood to a vampire was unthinkable, unforgivable and criminal, much less for a _hunter_ to do so. But the moral compass inside Zero told him that regardless of what vampires in general may be and what they may or may not deserve in the eyes of the hunters, the one in front of him seemed much more like a person than a beast, and Zero couldn't see why he –why anyone-- would deserve the life the pureblood currently had. Some strangely misplaced sense of fairness within the hunter whispered to him that alleviating that pain even if just a little might not be so big of a crime after all. And it wasn't as if it would cost him much anyway.

Kaname was eyeing him with surprise, not understanding where the hunter's ideas were taking him. The direction of it was too unthinkable for him to guess, although he definitely felt that something was really off.

When Zero pulled a short pocket-knife out of the pants he'd left by the bed, the pureblood backed away suddenly, raising his hands in front of him in a gesture that kept itself submissive and was apologetic and appeasing rather than taking the risk of actually looking defensive. "Please… you don't have to do this. Whatever I said that angered you, I take it back, but please…" He didn't dare say more, knowing that he might make the situation even worse if he dared to ask the hunter not to hurt him, as they never took it very well to have a vampire asking anything, even if it didn't sound in the least like an order.

Zero's eyes widened when he realized that the other had assumed he was about to torture him or something.

"I'm not going to cut _you_."

The hunter brought the knife down onto the underside of his wrist, slicing a neat little cut, making sure it was shallow enough that the bleeding wouldn't be too hard to stop. Blood pearled to the surface instantly, before turning into a red line and running into the hunter's palm as he maneuvered his hand around to try and avoid drops falling on the bed.

The scent of fresh blood had flooded the air between them, making the starved pureblood light-headed with need. Kaname's face flushed with shame when he realized with horror that he had let out a strangled little whimper of yearning at the sight of the crimson liquid. He let his head fall back on the bed, squeezing his reddened eyes shut hard, trying to control his breathing to keep the agonizing whirlpool of thirst inside him more or less manageable.  
He didn't have the slightest hope of getting any of that blood, and was naturally assuming the hunter was just being cruel, when Zero took him by complete surprise by running a bloody finger over the pureblood's tense lips that had been squeezed shut in a tight line.

"I cut it for a reason, you know…"

"Wha…"

The pureblood opened his mouth then closed it quickly, realizing he didn't sound very intelligent, or even intelligible at the moment.

"Kaname, drink. Lick it from my palm so you don't touch the wound."

A pureblood's saliva in the right amounts would turn a human into a vampire. Licking wouldn't be enough, penetration by fangs and the injection of saliva directly into the blood stream would be needed to have any chance of success, and with the quantity of anti-vampire drugs Kaname currently had in his blood –hunters didn't take any risks—it was highly unlikely that he could turn anyone even if he wanted to and had the freedom to try and bite someone, but Zero's compassion wasn't careless enough to take the risk, however tiny that risk may be. Instead of having the vampire touch the wound directly, he let the blood roll onto his palm, and offered that for him to lick.

Kaname didn't need to hear that order twice. He clung to that offered hand as if it was the last thing left in the world, and licked the crimson liquid greedily, violent shudders running through his whole body as the delicious sensations invaded him.  
He didn't waste a drop, licking the palm, sucking the fingers –something that was doing all sorts of things to another part of Zero's anatomy--, and making sure in general that the blood would go in direct contact with the wounds in his mouth, running his own tongue covered in blood over his wounds, so that it would be much more effective in soothing the pain than if he merely swallowed it and let his body take care of things. If his healing speed was the normal one, swallowing would work just as well, but because of the drugs, he healed slowly, and applying the blood directly onto the wounds was a faster and more effective method. He savored each and every drop, relishing in it like a man who's been give a nectar of heavens after being lost in the desert for an eternity.

Lower rank vampires and even nobles could fall in bloodlust more often if they didn't have blood regularly, but purebloods had more control over their instincts and rarely lost themselves in the need, they just progressively weakened more and more if not given any blood. As a result most of the time he was barely ever given any at all, regardless of how badly his body needed it.  
Generally, only when he'd sustain a particularly bad injury at the hands of a customer did they concede grudgingly in letting him drink from another vampire, and even then it was only the very bare necessary so that he could heal faster and be back to work faster.

Zero found it terribly strange, to have the sensation of that soft warm tongue licking every inch of his hand with a passion born of desperation and need. The tongue itself felt perfectly normal, warm and wet like a human's one would feel, but knowing it was a vampire, knowing he was giving him his blood… it sent a cold little feeling skittering along Zero's spine, at the idea of how terribly wrong what he was doing was. It contradicted just about everything he was ever taught, it was undoubtedly unforgivable, and in some people's eyes, it would certainly be seen as nothing short of some form of disgusting fraternizing with the enemy or perhaps even submission… At least, it was a safe bet that many of the older hunters would view it that way, a hunter offering his blood to a pureblood vampire.

But when Zero saw bliss momentarily replace the despair on Kaname's face as he let out a shuddering breath while clinging to the hunter's hand, blood-red eyes glazed with pleasure… there was no doubt in his mind that forbidden or not, this couldn't possibly be wrong. It didn't cost him a thing, and he was merely showing mercy to someone who was so very desperately in need of it. There couldn't be anything wrong with such an act.

The soft knocking on the door pulled his mind out of the musings it had wandered into while watching the pureblood licking his hand.

Zero wondered what the interruption could be for, but the look of horror on the pureblood's face gave him a vague idea. Kaname had quickly released the hunter's hand and backed away, a horrible certainty etched on his features.

The pureblood was torn between the inevitable fear and anger at himself. _He should have known… how could he be foolish enough to fall for it!!_

A calm and polite voice came from beyond the door, inquiring "Sir, we were informed that there might be a faint smell of blood coming from this room, so we just wanted to make sure that everything was fine."

They might not have even bothered checking if it was any other room, but they took even more precautions when it came to a pureblood slave, regardless of the drugs, and since Zero was a new customer they wanted to make sure everything was completely under control.

Kaname's head hung low, like a condemned prisoner who expected the worst to come any time now. He was persuaded that the hunter merely gave him blood to get him in trouble, and was kicking himself inwardly for having fallen for what should have been such an obvious trick.

When Zero loud and clearly declared that all was fine, shooing the attendant away and claiming that he was just 'playing' –an euphemism to say that he was throwing the slave into bloodlust for no reason other than watch him suffer, something that was far from being an uncommon practice--, the pureblood couldn't believe his ears.

The handler at the door believed the lie easily and left –who would ever believe the truth that was so unthinkable, when the lie was so much more likely?

Kaname stared at Zero with renewed awe. He'd been expecting the hunter to claim that he had attacked him or something, and he couldn't possibly understand why Zero had covered up for him instead, going as far as lying to protect him. Kaname would have been severely punished if they knew he'd drank from a hunter, willing donor or not.

Meanwhile, Zero had been applying pressure on the wound on his wrist with his other hand, to get the bleeding to stop, and was amused and touched by the look on Kaname's face. Not only the pureblood was completely off balance, but he had a lovely flush on his cheeks, relief flooding him as he heard the attendant's footsteps getting farther away in the corridor.

Kaname simply couldn't understand. The hunter didn't seem to have any intention to hurt him, and even lied for his sake…Zero had nothing to gain in preventing that punishment, much less in offering him blood in the first place.  
It was just so different from everything else the pureblood had experienced in so long that he just didn't know what to make of it.

"Why…?"

Zero looked back with a puzzled expression, surprised by the question.

"Why not?"

The hunter leaned back against the inviting pile of pillows propped by the head of the bed, gesturing for Kaname to come join him, apparently intending to return to his previous attempt of conversation, now that the pureblood seemed able to speak without as much trouble, the blood having considerably helped numb the pain in his gums and jaw.

But to Zero's surprise, rather than sitting next to him or laying back on the bed as they had been before, the pureblood slid fluidly between the hunter's legs, kneeling in the space that had formed between them as the hunter raised up his knees, startled.

"What-"

He'd been worried at first. What hunter wouldn't be, finding himself in such a disturbing position with a vampire? But before instincts got the best of him to make Zero shove the pureblood back, their eyes met and he saw the embarrassed glint of deep gratitude in Kaname's eyes, clearly not the look the hunter had been expecting.

The pureblood flushed slightly as he leaned further forward, lowering his face until it was mere inches away from the hunter's skin before he whispered "Please… allow me…?"

With the way the pureblood parted his lips sensually, tongue darting out to wet them, that sultry heat practically dripping from his gaze as he lowered his head and the long eyelashes shadowed his eyes, there was no doubt whatsoever in Zero's mind about what he was being offered. And yet, it contrasted so much with the nervousness he'd been feeling from the pureblood all along that he couldn't help but ask.

"But why?"

Kaname chuckled softly, before looking up again, now with a mischievous glint in his eyes, as he returned the hunter's words from a mere few moments ago.

_"Why not?"_

Because they could. Because he felt compelled to. Because it was the very only thing he had to offer to the hunter to show him his gratitude: his body, his services at the only type of skills he'd been allowed to have in the current world's status quo.  
There was no reason for Zero to _have_ to give Kaname his blood, and so Kaname felt compelled to repay him some way or another.

But it wasn't the only reason. He did it because he _wanted_ to.

For once in his life, he was actually given a choice. He, who had been forced by countless people, so many times that he'd long forgotten how it felt to think that you body belonged to yourself rather than to anyone who walked into the room and wanted to claim it… He, who hadn't been given a choice over anything in his life for the past ten years, was finally given one, and ironically, he chose to submit to this hunter, to give him pleasure out of his own will.

It was strangely freeing, to be doing that because he _wanted_ to rather than because he couldn't escape it, and the pureblood couldn't help a shudder of unexpected emotion before he dipped his head down and skillfully engulfed the hunter in his mouth, tongue already darting to tease the skin beneath the quickly hardening flesh.

Thanks to the hunter's blood, the pain in Kaname's mouth was considerably lessened, still present in the background but no longer throbbing as it had been before. Although at this point, the pureblood was so determined that he'd have gone on with it even if his jaw was killing him. He bobbed his head in a slow and sensual motion, silky lips tight around the hunter's arousal, sliding along the skin to pump it with a skill born of years of experience, tongue dancing along the sensitive skin of the underside with maddening precision with each motion, then teasing the tip of the shaft mercilessly as he let it slid out of his mouth before taking it back in.

Zero dug his fingers into the brunette's wavy dark hair, a silent cry of heated delight forming on his lips in response to the unbelievable sensations that he didn't even know were possible in this world.

And that was only the beginning. Kaname bobbed his head rhythmically with an expert rhythm while his fingertips ghosted tantalizing caresses over the inside of the hunter's thighs, sending jolts of delight skittering across the heat that was pooling in Zero's stomach more and more. Quickly, the hunter was unable to hold back a low moan, and then many more, his breath starting to come out in little gasps as the sensations escalated.

Getting a blowjob from a pureblood vampire was the ultimate thrill for a hunter, because of the instinctive reactions that were inevitable even in the current world.  
In a way, it was much like how fugu was considered special for a gourmet. The thrill of the danger made the release reached inside a pureblood's mouth to be considered the ultimate experience, regardless of the fact that —much like with fugu prepared by a good chef— there wasn't really any actual danger since they had their fangs torn off and were much too drugged and restrained by charms to be able to cause any harm whatsoever.

But beyond that instinctive thrill, Zero wasn't moaning under Kaname's ministrations merely because Kaname was a pureblood. It was because he was unbelievably skilled and knew exactly what to do with his lips, tongue, everything.

Zero mumbled incoherent words between heated gasps, his legs convulsing slightly on each side of the pureblood, completely lost under the onslaught of pleasure that was making him forget any coherent thought, a little more with each of the vampire's movements.

Kaname's fingers gently cupped the hunter's orbs, carefully fondling and stroking them with one hand while the other wrapped around the base of the shaft. He further angled his head to take the hunter deeper into his throat, his fist at just the right level of tightness around the hunter's arousal, sliding up when the pureblood's mouth retreated, and then back down to the base each time he swallowed the hunter again, earning a renewed string of heaving gasps and muffled moans from Zero. The added hand ensured that despite Kaname's mouth being small and graceful, the absolute entire length of the hunter's arousal was stimulated at all times, sending waves of intense pleasure racking through all of Zero's body.

Telltale signs let Kaname know the hunter was nearing climax, but the pureblood wasn't done with him yet, and the hand that had been caressing the hunter's orbs slid upwards onto the base of his arousal to skillfully press the area beneath it where the urethra ran closer to the skin, the pressure starting gentle enough that it wouldn't cause an unpleasant abrupt stop, but precise and definitely blocking the hunter's release, forcing his pleasure to go on building up indefinitely as the pureblood continued his ministrations on Zero's throbbing flesh.

When Zero felt his incoming orgasm blocked, he nearly cried out in frustration, fingers instinctively tightening their grip on the pureblood's hair. But the pleasure was building up to such intensely unbelievable levels, that Zero wasn't quite sure if he wanted to scream for one reason or for the other. It felt indescribable. His mind was so lost in it that it was almost like there was too much pleasure for it to possibly be contained within his body, an irrational thought telling him that it felt so good that he might explode or die from it, but he never wanted it to _ever_ _ever_ stop. The molten pressure rose like a tidal wave, higher with each second, but rather than reaching a peak and then falling down, it kept going until he felt he might lose his mind.

With partially instinctive and partially learned precision, the pureblood released his grip the very instant before the pressure reached a level so high that it would have stopped being maddeningly pleasant and started to be slightly painful.

It was as if the floodgates holding back all the pent up heat inside Zero had shot open suddenly. The hunter's fingers let go of the pureblood's hair and flew back to the bed, knotting tightly onto the bedsheets.

Zero actually screamed, his head pressed hard against the pillows behind him, his seed spilling out deep into the pureblood's willing throat. Kaname slowed down his motions, milking the hunter's pleasure slowly, still bobbing his head until the very last drop was spent and swallowed, watching as Zero's body was agitated by the last tremors of his mind-shattering climax.

The hunter stared at the canopy of the bed above him, lights dancing in front of his eyes as he panted, lost in the bliss and partially out of breath.

_The Blowjob Of A Lifetime... _That didn't even begin to cover it.

The hunter felt as if he could melt into the bed anytime now, completely limp, utterly spent and feeling boneless.

He was so out of it that he didn't even notice the pureblood had left the bed at all, until he heard the sound of running water coming from the adjacent bathroom.

Zero lifted his head off the satiny pillows with difficulty, cursing himself inwardly for the unbelievable abandon with which he'd nearly passed out from pleasure just now. He had been so completely lost that the pureblood could have done anything he wanted to him at that moment, and Zero would probably have taken too long to snap out of it and stop him.

Of course, that would have been nothing short of suicide on Kaname's part. Even slightly harming a customer in any way, especially an active-duty hunter, would have cost him more torture and abuse than any customer could possibly give him in quite a while, even the more sadistic ones.

The times at the beginning, back when the pureblood still had dared to rebel, had left an indelible scar hat he'd carry forever in his memory; he knew better than doing anything foolish. No vampire ever dared to, nowadays. Even a pureblood knew better than make such a nightmarish situation even worse than it already was. And purebloods were particularly intelligent and more likely to choose their survival over a foolish momentary victory or misplaced instant of pride that would cost them direly on the long run.

Even if Kaname had touched the hunter with no intention to harm him but still in an inappropriate manner, it would have had tragic consequences: one of the most basic rules for the enslaved vampires was that in no circumstances whatsoever were they ever allowed to be sexually dominant. The submission was at the very core of their slave status. No hunter would ever allow a vampire to penetrate them. That was also in part the reason why the 'houses' were mostly frequented by men, although some specialized in the feminine clientele, with female vampire slaves as well as the occasional young males to be dominated, but it was by far a minority, as it was still a rather misogynic society where female hunters weren't that common, and where they most often preferred to take over a male's behavior with the slaves, or just forget about them altogether.

Zero was still staring at the ceiling with an expression of semi-catatonic stupefaction, trying to will himself to be angry at himself for having lost track of everything so much when the pureblood pleasured him, but not managing to tear himself out of the beatific delight of the moment.

Kaname appeared again, in the frame of the door leading to the bathroom.

"From when you paid the advance, I saw the amount of time you set… you still have a good while left, so I took the liberty to run a bath for you, if you'd like…my lord."  
Kaname wasn't sure how to address him, as he suspected that Zero didn't much care for the customary "lord" that vampires were made to call any hunter. But since he didn't know the hunter's name or preferences on the matter, he stuck with it.

Zero stared at him, puzzled for a moment. He didn't know how the pureblood had guessed that he'd like a bath. It was eerie, unless perhaps it just meant he was awfully predictable and all customers wanted that afterwards? Zero felt stupid for not knowing which it was, but he forgot his thoughts right away when he saw the look on the pureblood's face. Kaname quickly schooled his features back, but for a moment, there was a wistful look on his face that went straight to Zero's heart. They really had shared something terribly intimate a moment before, hadn't they? It had been more than a mere transaction, or a slave forced to pleasure a hunter because that was how society was.

Kaname had given Zero that bliss out of his own choice, and the hunter realized that well, although he wasn't sure how to take it… Zero's reflections were interrupted when he realized that he was still very much under the effect of said bliss, as he nearly fell when he tried to get up from the bed and found that his legs were still so weak from the spectacular climax that his knees buckled under and nearly didn't sustain the weight of his body. He caught himself on the bed post, and flushed slightly, glad that the pureblood had turned around and disappeared into the bathroom already, missing the embarrassing moment when the hunter nearly fell over.

Kaname was pulling a set of soft plush towels out of a small wooden cabinet in the luxurious marble-tiled bathroom, trying to occupy his hands in hopes his mind would stop wandering where he didn't want it to go.

_Why had he done that for that hunter?_

And not haphazardly either. He'd completely thrown himself into it. Normally, he just let the customers lead as he was supposed to, and provided the bare minimum of effort he had to in order to avoid getting in trouble, but he'd never have gone out of his way to try to enhance a customer's experience or prolongate it. And yet, he'd given himself to that young hunter with an ardor that he couldn't explain to himself.

Said hunter showed up in the door frame, looking a tidbit unsteady and still slightly flushed from the recent experience. The pureblood tried to tear his mind out of his disturbing musings, not wanting it to show on his face. His usual life was hard enough as it was… opening up to a customer the way he had made him feel terribly vulnerable, so much more so than he was already due to the whole situation. Vulnerable not only in his body but in his feelings, which frightened Kaname far more than threats of beatings possibly could.

He broke the awkward silence in an attempt to escape his own thoughts.

"Would you like rose petals along with the scented salts in the water?"

The hunter's striking silvery amethyst eyes widened for a brief instant at the question, before he nodded emphatically. He'd never had a bath with anything fancy like that in it. If it was included in the package, he wasn't about to miss out on the experience.  
Of course, he wasn't going to admit that to the vampire either, so he merely put on a nonchalant face, one he imagined a man who bathed with roses everyday may have, and nodded again, more calmly this time.

Kaname turned around again, picking up a small jar and dipping his fingers into it, scooping a large handful of the fragrant petals and scattering them over the warm water that had filled the creamy white bathtub. He'd already dissolved scented salts into it, and the wonderful fragrance of antique _sombreuil_ roses was filling the air of the bathroom in a most pleasant manner.

Zero couldn't help but admire the beautiful curve of the pureblood's bare body as he bent forward to throw the petals. His cheeks colored a little as his body automatically reacted to the sight despite how sated he was.

Much as Zero would have liked to conceal his thoughts, they were obvious both on his face an on another part of his body, and Kaname was much too used to being on the receiving end of heated looks to not immediately know what Zero had been thinking, as soon as he turned around and glanced at him. The pureblood lowered his head and stepped aside, gesturing for the bath. "Your bath… is ready, my lord." His voice was so low. He'd practically croaked that line out, and he was mortified. He'd thought he had better control over himself than that. It was stupid really, to feel embarrassed by the hunter looking at him. Considering how many people came to his room each night, it was nothing short of ridiculous that he'd feel disturbed by this man's intentions for his body. But for some reason, it was different with him. Maybe because Kaname had given himself to the task of pleasuring him with such abandon earlier. Or maybe because the hunter was so inexplicably kind to him, so completely at the far opposite of everybody else's behavior.

The simple fact that he could _speak_ to that hunter was so exceptional. Hunters didn't like speaking to vampires. They wanted to keep their slaves well aware that they were considered nothing more than beasts, so speaking when not ordered was a sure way to get punished, usually with a swift beating. With a normal customer, Kaname would remain silent unless given an order, or unless he absolutely had to ask a question that was necessary enough that he felt the customer might not take it too badly.  
But with this hunter, for some reason everything seemed so different. The silver-haired man strangely made him feel like he wasn't about to be beaten or raped any instant in his presence, and that was a feeling that Kaname had sadly forgotten a long time ago. He didn't know how to deal with it, and it unsettled him greatly.

And at the present moment, it also sent strange feelings crawling into his heart, which he didn't know how to take. He found himself so unexpectedly soothed by the hunter's gentleness earlier when the man let him drink his blood that he almost felt like crying.  
Tears were one thing he tried his very best to not show his tormentors, so it was a particularly surprising reaction for him.

It was as if the unexpected kindness had jarred him off the cruel reality he lived in, jolting his feelings and memories back to a time when he was still innocent, and people still treated him with care and kindheartedness.

Worse yet, despite how sadly used to the abuse he was, he found himself desperately hoping that _this_ hunter wouldn't do to him what he thought he might, a second ago when he turned around and saw the heat in the man's eyes. Because then, it would be like with everybody else, and the inexplicable closeness they'd shared would shatter in an instant. If the customer had been brutal, if he'd beaten him or mistreated him in any way, it would have been just another day, he'd have taken the pain as he always did, doing his best to shield his mind from the damage his body may suffer… but this gentleness... it made Kaname's locked up heart achingly want to open up to soak in it, basking in the little ray of warmth that he normally never felt, in that frozen nightmare he was trapped in constantly.

He was used to men doing whatever they pleased with his body, but his heart was another thing altogether. He'd desperately tried all he possibly could during those past ten years to lock his heart away and not let it shatter to pieces completely. Now that he'd felt this unexpected warmth he felt terrible off-balanced and vulnerable, as if he'd shed what little barriers he still had, and the hunter just had to reach up and crush him.

--

In the end, much to the pureblood's amazement, Zero hadn't done what Kaname feared he would do. To his renewed amazement, the hunter simply slipped into the bathtub without even touching him.

Kaname was still holding his breath though, and indeed, as he expected, the man immediately beckoned for him to get in the spacious bathtub with him.

The pureblood had been certain then that the hunter would claim him in the water. But Zero merely held him instead and enjoyed the rose-scented water and the pleasant warmth of the bath, soothing their bodies and relaxing all muscles to the point of near-lethargic bliss.  
With his back pressed against the hunter's front, the pureblood could feel well the other's hardened length against his lower back, but rather than all that Kaname had been fearing, the hunter simply let his body progressively relax in the water, remaining hard but not doing anything to the pureblood, much to the latter's surprise.

They –or at least Zero-- enjoyed the bath mostly in awkward silence, trying not to focus their attention on each other's body (not an easy task), but rather on the bath itself, on its soothing fragrance and the pleasantly comfortable heat of the water, kept that way by a heating system that ensured that the bath didn't grow cold regardless of how long a customer stayed in it.

At long last, the hunter had decided to leave, and Kaname promptly handed him the towel set he had taken out for that purpose –they were naturally intended for the customers, not for the vampires, much like everything else in the room as well.

Before the hunter finally left, he'd nodded at the pureblood, almost shy in his uncertainty of what to say, and mumbled out a "take care…"

The door of the room clicked shut and Kaname was left completely puzzled. All his assumptions had been wrong, and the man hadn't done anything cruel to him in the end… and that parting… _"Take care…?"_

The pureblood couldn't remember anyone having ever told him such a thing. Before the end of the war, there had been little need for him to take care –he was a pureblood—and after the defeat, there was no one left to care for him, so the notion was completely foreign for Kaname.

The pureblood wandered back to the bed, his sense of smell still more powerful than a human's even with the drugs, and able to quickly spot on the rumpled sheets a few drops of the hunter's blood, that had fallen before the bleeding finally stopped.

He was dreadfully tempted to bury his face on those sheets, to inhale the soothing scent of that blood –and even that of the kind hunter himself—but he suddenly snapped himself out of the urge, shocked by how vulnerable he was at the moment, and by how much the hunter had managed to get him to open up. _This was bad, really bad._ _Not only wrong, but also terribly dangerous. _

It was difficult enough to get through each day as it was, but if he found himself so terribly unguarded things would be countless times worse. He had to put a stop to that right now, rather than let himself open up even more to a foolish hope that maybe they weren't all the same.

And on top of that, it had been almost a month now since the last time his worst nightmare had dropped by, and Kaname couldn't possibly allow himself to be so vulnerable now, when his whole world might tip upside down again any time.  
_Not without terrible consequences._

He pulled the sheets off quickly, holding his breath while he did, so that he wouldn't feel tempted by the inviting scent, and tossed it all in the laundry bin placed inside a hidden little space on the wall, made to conceal the unsightly bin from the customers until it was taken out the next morning.

He pulled out fresh sheets and made the bed, trying his best to gather himself and be ready for the next customer, hoping with all he had that it would be anyone but the one person whose visit he dreaded above almost all else.

_._

_._

_._

_[tbc...]_

* * *

_The title of this chapter is from a line in the lyrics of "It's all tears", by HIM. :D  
I really like that song and listen to it a lot when writing this fic. X3 Among other HIM songs._

_That one is very much the soundtrack for this fic, for now. XD Along with "Lose you tonight" and a few others. X3_

_Amusing reading/research was done to come up with various techniques for Kaname's bed abilities. XD *lol*  
I figure that if he's been in a brothel for so many years, he's bound to have learned some quite amazing things, even if usually the hunters won't let him in charge of deciding anything... but him picking up that knowledge would be inevitable at one point or another, regardless of the fact that he hates it..._

_By the way, the story is nowhere near closure. XD (Some people were wondering whether it would be a short one or not.)  
__Usually, I tend to write really short series, but it's mostly because of the lack of time and having too many different plot bunnies. This one is one of the ones I hadn't started posting for a while because I feared I wouldn't have time to update it regularly, but my Muses were so hyped up for it that I ended up going for it despite lack of time etc. XD_

_**NOTE**__**:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,**__ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
Zero still grew up among hunters, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and was never turned into a vampire, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__ take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons, although I don't know yet if the ages will be AU to be older back at the time of the war or not.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	4. An ode for cruelty

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 4 – An ode for cruelty.  
**__**Pairings: Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**Warnings: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and lemons from time to time.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_I'll be posting the review replies in my forum, in the "Cradle of Blood review replies" topic. ^^/  
You can find it and see when new replies have been added to it by clicking on my profile.  
(I'll add replies to the previous chapters with each new chapter as well.)_

_Erm, this is a bit of hard chapter for Kaname. Not so much in what happens in the chapter itself as much as what he remembers.  
You might want to skip some bits of it if non-con or abuse themes squicks you… although considering you're reading this story I think you probably don't mind that as much. XD *lol*.  
__Now you can start to see what he was thinking of back in chapter 2, when I mentioned "__deeper reasons why he wanted to avoid getting into too much trouble. Reasons as dark and old as the war itself, and of which to this day he wasn't free yet. Maybe nothing could ever free him from it, after all."_

_But it's a Hurt/Comfort fic, there should eventually be comfort, not just hurt, so... yeah. Hang in there? XD; *lol*_

_And, uhm, please don't hate Zero for his musings? XD;  
He was raised in the hunters' society after all. It's already amazing he didn't turn out like the others. But he'll be in for a surprise in the next chapter. ;)_

* * *

.

.

The pureblood wasn't the only one unsettled by that night, although not in the same way.

Zero was glad enough that his colleagues at the headquarters had finally fully accepted him as one of them and stopped calling him _'cherry boy', _now that the stupid tradition was officially over –since they didn't know that he didn't do anything to Kaname— but he was definitely having trouble forgetting the pureblood.

Scratch that, it was more than just having trouble forgetting, it was more like having trouble not letting his thoughts stray to him throughout the whole day, even.

In his wounded beauty, Kaname was so vividly different from all the vampire stereotypes that Zero had been expecting, that the hunter didn't know what to make of it.

The vampires Zero had encountered in the hunt were almost always level E's, wandering survivors of the war lost in the wilderness, rarely ever approaching the outskirts of the populated areas.  
And he'd never gone to the 'houses' before, so he had assumed that the pleasure slaves would be very much the same beasts that all hunters said that vampires were, regardless of what former rank they might have had before the end of the war. At best, he had expected a sleazy creature cunningly fake and civilized only in appearances, the veneer of civilization covering an obvious beast.  
Kaname couldn't possibly be farther from such a thing.

_The pureblood was so… human. _

Zero was pretty sure that if the situation had been different –if they were older and had met during the war, for example—and Kaname was a pureblood in full possession of his power and position-- things would probably have gone _very_ differently.  
The image Zero had of vampires in general and purebloods in particular –arrogant, manipulative, full of themselves-- was such that he had no doubts that they'd have inevitably clashed.

But whether because this pureblood was truly different or because the situation he was forced to live in made him so utterly helpless, Kaname was so completely far away from those stereotypes that Zero found himself drawn to him and unsure of his own beliefs.

And there was a more… pressing matter at hand too, which took a most certain precedence over the more philosophical aspects of the hunter's current thoughts.  
To be more exact, said matter was not only pressing but _hardening_ rather fast, at the mere memory of the pureblood's luscious body and his smooth, silky skin, pale and inviting to the touch.

Zero of course didn't regret not having brutalized the pureblood like apparently so many --if not all-- the other customers of the 'house' did, but he was feeling slightly stupid for the whole ordeal, especially for the part where he chivalrously restrained his urges to take him in the bathtub, and merely, well… _bathed_.

_Talk about a waste. _

To Zero's surprise, the final price had turned out to be considerably less expensive than he had feared, which was unexpected considering it was a pureblood and Zero had expected the fare to be much higher, but still, he was feeling stupid for having wasted the chance, rather than the money.

After all, if the pureblood was so willing to pleasure him, why did he have such foolish scruples of touching him? That was what the vampire was there for, that was what everybody did to him every single night anyway, so it should be fine… right?

The memory of the pale perfection of the pureblood's body mingled in the hunter's mind with the memory of his terribly sad eyes, and Zero wasn't sure if he wanted to see him again to fix the mistake of not having slept with him that night, or if he wanted to see him because he was terribly intrigued by that sadness and by how different he was.

In the end, both urges combined and the hunter made his way to the blood district once again that evening, as soon as his work was over for the day and he'd finished reporting to the Hunter Association headquarters.

The voice of reason and that of his conscience were leading a quiet battle inside Zero's mind. After all, it wasn't as if his decision to go and sleep with that pureblood after all was a bad thing… it didn't necessarily make him like all the other people abusing the vampires. He didn't mean to hurt him and brutalize him, for example. That alone should make a huge difference.

That pureblood, much like all other vampires in this day and age, was left alive for no reason other than serving the hunters, to be a pleasure object… so it should be fine, right?  
And either way, as long as Zero wasn't being rough or unnecessarily cruel, it shouldn't be immoral to sleep with him. Right…? _Everybody else was doing it anyway! _Why should he be the only one with stupid scruples stopping him from enjoying that which was so freely given away anyway?!

Of course, he was far from knowing that what Kaname had given him was a rare gift, absolutely not something he gave freely to anyone who came by. Kaname had opened up to Zero in a way very different from the way he was normally forced to pleasure the house's customers.  
A part of the hunter might have realized that, on some deep unconscious level, but his hormones were speaking too loudly at the moment for him to give ears to that.

The voice of reason had countless arguments to justify the idea, regardless of the indignation in the voice of Zero's conscience… but the latter's voice was getting more and more difficult to listen to, now that the images playing in the hunter's mind were having quite an effect on his young body's appetites, and making any idea of resisting the urge to go to the 'house' completely impossible.

But when Zero got there, Kaname wasn't in the display window, despite the fact that the hunter had arrived early, even earlier than the previous time he came over, which had already been long before the peak hours –his chaperone who tagged along the previous time had years of experience with _'visiting'_ the blood district, and had explained that it was best to go as early as possibly, before the brunt of the visitors came, so that the slaves were less tired and in a better shape, since the more the night progressed, the more the amount of customers grew, and, as the old hunter put in a rather unsubtle manner _" 'unless you're into that sorta thing, 'tis best to go before they're so messed up that they can barely stand and are all banged up. Not that that ain't fun too, but it depends on what yer' looking for."_

If the slaves were hurt, unless the damage was such that they were completely unusable for the rest of the night, they wouldn't be treated until the next day. So the timing was important, especially when going for a slave that might be more popular, receive more customers, and thus be more likely to get hurt.

Zero counter-checked the display, wanting to make sure before going in, and Kaname was indeed nowhere to be seen. The regal fauteuil Zero had seen the pureblood shackled to the previous time was still in place, empty.

As he ran his eyes over the window one last time, the hunter noted that some of the other vampires in the display had nervous expressions, seeming particularly bothered by something today, which he couldn't pinpoint.  
Not all of them looked that way, most were impassible or sporting the usual empty gazes, the dead light in their eyes giving them the appearance of a glass doll, perfect beauty made empty in their hearts by years of abuse and forced acceptance of a life of servitude in the most humiliating manner.

A few others had a more hardened, almost cruelly amused gaze, apparently reveling in the sight of the despair etched on the face of the ones who were looking nervous and who had caught Zero's eye.  
A young vampire with a boyish beauty enhanced by his tousled blond locks and striking blue eyes looked particularly sorrowful and jittery. So did the two sitting closest to him --a female with long hair falling over her shoulders and arms in cascading waves, and a male with fiery hair and a dead-looking gaze.

That little mystery occupied the hunter's mind for a few instants, but he shrugged off the thought, unable to figure out whatever might be causing the strange moods of the creatures in the window.

Zero went in anyway, and asked at the front desk if the pureblood was with a customer and when he would be free, to know if he should just stick around and wait. They had tables and a tea-house service for customers interested in a slave in particular and willing to be momentarily entertained by others while waiting for their turn with the one that was busy.

The attendant, a balding man with wrinkly skin and a sleazy gaze --whom Zero wondered if he was the husband of the old harpy who'd been at the desk the previous time he visited--, informed the young hunter that the wait would be much too long, and that he should just return another day.

The pureblood had been with a_ special customer_ all day already. The old man explained that there was someone _'real important'_, who came to visit the young pureblood once a month or so, and who would call ahead and take him out of commission to spend a whole day and a night with him each time he came. The house would normally begin business hours in the evening only, but exceptions were always made for special customers.

And apparently, that customer liked things rather rough, so it usually took some more time before the pureblood could be put back to work again, from what the man told Zero.

"So it's all over for today, young sir. Just come back tomorrow or the day after, and you can have him all for yourself as much as you want. Today it's just not possible."

In truth, the man knew that the next day would probably be impossible as well—due to the consequences of today—but he was greedy enough that he didn't want to risk missing a customer for so little.

The man had of course offered Zero to get him any other slave instead, but the hunter wasn't interested in just any vampire. After all, he'd merely returned to the house because he was so puzzled by that pureblood in particular.

Zero was disappointed –and even more than a little surprised that someone would rent a slave for such a length of time, regularly no less—but there was no way around it, so he decided to return the next day and walked out sighing heavily, cursing the poor timing that made that he'd have to rush home for a cold shower now.

To his surprise, he found that he had a thread of worry forming for the pureblood, at the idea of what he might be going through at the current moment. He didn't expect to feel that way considering he'd only met him once, and even more so, considering that it was… a bloodsucker, a beast, a slave… but he just couldn't help the strange feeling worming its way in his mind, replacing his heated mood of a moment ago with images of that pale skin marred with bruises, making the hunter feel strange and uncomfortable.

Absentmindedly, Zero wondered if perhaps the three vampires in the display window, who had been looking so sad and worried had been that way because they knew what was happening to the pureblood. If that was the case, they were in danger themselves, as loyalty to purebloods was punished severely rather than rewarded, in this day and age.

Only very few still regarded their fallen lords with anything close to respect. The majority had learned the lesson well, and avoided the issue as well as they could, when they didn't downright look down on the purebloods for how low they'd fallen, and for their failure to protect the vampire race from this cruel fate. It didn't matter that purebloods were much too rare to have changed the course of the war, or that the vampire society had been cruelly using them already before the war anyway. It was easier to blame them, and so much of the lower ranks did so…

--

Kaname had been feeling a rising dread all the past few days, as it was usually the case when a certain time of the month neared. The handlers knew when the man would come, because he apparently called ahead of time to have Kaname taken out of the row, but of course they didn't care to inform the pureblood when that would be, so most of the times he only found out when he was told to wait in his room, instead of being taken to the display if it was in the evening, or, if the man came in the morning, instead of being allowed to sleep to be ready for the next night.

He couldn't do anything to guess the timing of the unpredictable surprise visits, but the habitual monthly ones lasted much longer and were always around the same time, give or take a few days, so it was always an inevitable crescendo of terror as each new customer made Kaname turn to the door with utter dread, expecting the loathed face to show up the next time the door opened to let someone in.

And inevitably, sooner or later it always did. The pureblood didn't have access to his powers due to the drugs, but instinctive sixth sense was something else altogether, and when the door clicked that morning, he somehow knew it, even before he could see who it was.

"_Ichiou…" _

The pureblood's whisper was almost a low growl, seeping with absolute hatred.

The older man walked in, power dripping from his gait with each step, the tip of his cane clacking against the wooden floor of the room. His eyes were as cold and unflinching as ever, contrasting with the twisted smirk beginning to show on his lips as he approached the pureblood, who was standing not far from the bed, doing all he could to appear calm. Ichiou enjoyed immensely those opening minutes each time he visited Kaname, the moments where he got to see the dread rising fast within the young pureblood, before he started _playing_ with him.

"Tut-tut, you know I don't go by that name anymore…"

The sickening smile of pure sadistic glee that took over the older man's face sent a spike of instinctive fear up Kaname's spine.

If this was the world they had both lived in before the war, Kaname could have torn him to pieces with a mere thought. Even if the older man had still been a vampire, and not a human as he was now, a wolf in the guise of a lamb, Kaname could have destroyed him before Ichiou had the time to lay a single finger on him. Political reasons would have made it impractical and dangerous then because of the council, but it was still physically perfectly possible, in the old world.

But this world they lived in now was a twisted, upside down thing.

A world where the hunters had completely upset the balance of things, and where Kaname was in such a vulnerable position, that even if he hadn't been completely drained, weakened and starved of blood as he was, the drugs and restraining charms alone would have made him completely helpless in the enemy's hands.

While the young pureblood was prisoner and unjustly subjected to the most humiliating horrors, Ichiou was human, free to come and go anywhere he wished, unhindered by any of the fools around him, who completely believed that he was one of them.

He had a hunter's strength now, by an unforgivable method, cheating nature and betraying everything that was most sacred. An old spell from a long gone age had sealed his vampire genes and enabled this unforgivable superchery, at a terrible cost.

And by other equally twisted methods, Ichiou had regained his memories and sneaked his way into the human society, thanks to his alliance with the corrupt president of the Hunter Association, who provided him with all the forged background he had needed at the end of the war.

The ex-vampire's plans had worked well, and no one among the humans suspected that he could be anything but a respectable fellow hunter.

And Kaname's position as a slave made that even if he took the risk to speak of it to anyone, no one would ever believe a word he said. He would only get punished more harshly for daring to speak against a hunter… not to mention that Ichiou had also wormed his way well up the Hunter Association's hierarchy, and was in a rather comfortable position now, his corrupt alliances and his current rank making him very much untouchable no matter what he did. He had been excellent at the games of the old world while he controlled the vampire council, and he excelled just as well in the games of this new world.

Ichiou took a sadistic pleasure in reminding the young pureblood of how powerless and utterly at his mercy he currently was, through all manner of things, _especially_ during his monthly visits.

Kaname knew well that resisting would only result in things being much worse for himself, but he just couldn't help it, regardless of how much the lesson had sank in deep, over ten years. Normally, he never resisted the customers, knowing that it would be pointless and just earn him additional beatings without achieving anything other than weakening him further, but this man… with him things were different.

With him, no matter how painful it would inevitably be, Kaname couldn't help but resist each time, his heart rebelling against his reason and refusing at any cost to submit, even if he knew that resistance was entirely futile and pointless, something done almost more for the sake of appearances… merely to fool himself a little longer, since he no longer could fool the enemy in front of him.

Kaname could submit to the customers because there was always a hope that they might not come back, or even if they did, it wasn't a certain, absolute inevitability. What nearly inexistent pride he might still have wasn't entirely shattered by giving his body to them because there was always that hope, and more importantly, it wasn't personal. He could close his eyes while they ravaged him, and let his mind drift away to his little haven, trying his very best to block the loathsome sensations and sounds. But with Ichiou, things were very, very personal. Kaname loathed him with a burning passion born of hatred and fury, that overwhelmed any other feeling in his body.

And with Ichiou, he was terrified beyond reason. He couldn't possibly block anything at all. A single finger from that man touching him was enough to make his skin crawl and feel like it was about to break into hives, worse than anyone else's touch.

The mere sight of the older man was a permanent reminder of what he had done, not only the more direct and physical things that he'd done to Kaname himself, but what he did to the young pureblood's family. The horror had scarred deep into his memory, impossible to ever ignore.

And so inevitably, Kaname found himself resisting, bruised arms trying to shove the man away, weakened thighs trying to close with any thread of strength they could possibly muster, regardless that they knew they were tiring fast and would soon be forced apart by brutal hands. He would go on resisting and struggling regardless of how much the man beat him each time, and regardless of the fact that –resistance of not—the pureblood knew well that he stood no chance.

No matter how much hatred showed on Kaname's face, deep inside he was terrified beyond belief. He'd always been terrified of Ichiou, almost as much as he hated him. Because he knew that regardless of his best attempts to resist and all the rage he may feel, Ichiou would inevitably beat him down into submission and rape him, yet again, over and over. No matter how much he tried to fight, in the end he would be completely incapable of stopping him, and the older man would humiliate him and drown him with physical and mental abuse until Kaname broke to pieces all over again… And then, the shame of having surrendered yet again would tear him apart and devour him inside, the force of his hatred for the man turning against himself for his weakness, for his surrender, for his never ending agony of shame that he couldn't possibly stop.  
It was so much worse than any physical abuse than a random customer could put him through.

Who knew what new depraved tortures the older man had in stock for the pureblood this time around? Kaname repressed the trembling that was threatening to take over his arms and legs, and addressed his enemy a cold glare, quite an achievement for one so close to the edge of panic.

Someone who knew Kaname less well might almost have thought him in control of himself. Someone who had never seen those two interacting before might have even believed the apparent poise in the pureblood's bearing, that wanted itself self-confident and proud, ready to face his enemy without giving an inch of terrain.

But in truth, the ice was giving way under the pureblood's feet _fast_.

A frozen terror was slowly poisoning Kaname's muscles, clouding his reason as he desperately clung to what little stubbornness he still had left –to replace his pride, that was long lost—and focused his entire will into not letting his knees buckle under him nor allow himself to step back.

By an effort that cost Kaname all of his willpower, he managed to stay upright even as the older man approached, but he couldn't prevent himself from eventually stepping back when he got too close, and then, the back of his knees hit the bed and he fell back sitting on it.

Ichiou smirked hungrily at the sight of the flash of terror that passed through Kaname's eyes before it was quickly hidden, the pureblood's intensely nervous face steeling itself into a mask of utterly fake calm, forcing itself to appear cold and detached rather than admitting how terrified he was, especially now that the ex-vampire was standing right by the bed, in the spot between the pureblood's parted legs, preventing him from closing them.

Ichiou seized Kaname by his chin in a firm grip, and forced him to look up, sizing up the amount of defiance to expect today from the glare the pureblood was still sporting.

"So what will it be this time, my little _slave_? Will you cooperate and be nice, or will you get the whip or the cane again? Or do you need a stronger reminder this time? Hhm? Do we need a repeat of some of the previous lessons…? You have always learned so slowly…"

If it was mere physical pain, it would be nothing. Kaname would hurt on the moment but he would endure and rely on the knowledge that his body would heal anyway. Even the humiliation, Kaname somehow thought he could take most of it and manage to pull himself together afterwards again. _Maybe. _He'd been doing it for so long after all. He kept surviving, swallowing the shame and telling himself he could push yet a little bit farther.

The problem was, this was different. This was wildly different. _Ichiou_ was different.

And not just because he was extremely good at torture and debasing his victim, by far better than any of the passing customer or even the more specialized handlers.

Ichiou was a complete different case. Not only he'd been in a very large part responsible for the demise of Kaname's family at the end of the war, but after that, after the tragedy at the Kuran manor, after Kaname had lost in one night everything he'd ever had…

The pureblood had been so young back then. He'd been so lost, so completely torn by the loss of his loved ones. So desperately hoping that Yuuki at least would make it out of the horror safely.  
He'd made sure that she was on her way to safety before he went back to the house and walked right into the most horrible trap.  
But if what happened there wasn't bad enough, once the fight was over and Kaname had lost, badly wounded from the battle with Rido, the young pureblood found himself regaining conscience in an unknown place, in shackles, drugged, and completely at Ichiou's mercy.

The nightmare that followed would leave a raw wound on his soul that was still bleeding now, dread dripping through his body with each shuddering breath he let out as the older man leaned over him and Kaname desperately tried to steady his breathing, as he wished his heart wouldn't be beating so loudly, confessing his fear to the enemy in the most shameful manner. With each new meeting, Kaname was reminded of every single instant of the period he spent in Ichiou's grip shortly after the war ended.

Back when Ichiou had him at his mercy for the very first time, Kaname believed himself strong, proud, powerful…

A pureblood's body naturally started to mature at an age slightly earlier than that of a human. It was evolution's gift to enhance their chances of surviving and reproducing despite the danger of everyone around them desiring their blood.  
So by the time he was captured Kaname had already technically gone through puberty and reached sexual maturity, even though back in his sheltered life, he hadn't had any experiences whatsoever, as his parents had managed to protect him from the council's machinations so far. Regardless of his body's maturity, he was still completely innocent, as much as a human his age would have been.

Idealistic, proud and utterly innocent, almost to the point of _naïveté _when it came to such things…

He was ready to fight to his last breath. He would not submit. _Or so he believed._

But he quickly found out that the drugs made him weaker than a human even, unable to use his powers, unable to do anything. Unable even to heal properly between the sessions of abuse. He struggled weakly in his captor's hands, but still he tried to fight. The doses were upped even more, until he was too lost in drug-induced hallucinations to be able to even _think_ of trying to stop Ichiou. No longer could the young pureblood tell whether it was reality or nightmare, when he was alone and when there was someone in the room with him. There were times when he was so far gone that his body and mind ached to the point that he didn't know if he was still being raped or just hallucinating alone on the dirty cot his raw wrists were shackled to.  
_Hands all over his body, bruising his skin, forcing him spread open…_ He could never tell when he was imagining and when it was real.

He was passed around countless times, and lost track of time and space. Weeks, months passed without him knowing what to do or what to expect anymore, losing himself mind and body completely, unable even to remember how long had passed or in how many ways he'd been raped. He'd forgotten his own age, nearly forgotten his own name and the faces of his loved ones. At first, he'd tried focusing on them in his mind, desperately afraid of losing that last thing that made him who he was. But soon he felt too dirty to even dare to think of their faces, afraid he's soil the memories with his presence.

Slowly, he wondered if his very sanity was eroding away with each session, with each rape, with each additional moment of horror hanging on the very edge between reality and horrifying hallucinations, the amped up drugs twisting his perceptions and cruelly playing with his ability to tell what was happening.

Until he finally lost himself completely, pride and self-respect shattering to pieces irreparably when he finally gave in and begged for mercy. He never forgave himself for breaking.

Nor did he ever stand back up again after that fall.

In the best days of his imprisonment, he curled up on the dreadful cot and sobbed as silently as he could, not having the strength to even tug at his restraints.  
Regardless that he had had no choice over anything, he hated himself a little bit more with each concession he was forced to make, with each plead that escaped his lips torn by force by his amused tormentors. The sound of his begging was music to their ears, but it never was enough to make them stop.

In his own eyes, he was damned forever. His guilt and shame tore at him constantly, almost as badly as the horrifying nightmares had, lost between both feelings. Surrender left an even more bitter taste in his mouth than the agony of the rapes and the torture had. The combined damage caused by both was absolutely irreparable, and had haunted the young pureblood ever since, making surviving each day a terrible challenge, even long after he'd left Ichiou's place. He may be in a brothel now rather than under the older man's roof, but he knew well that that too was for Ichiou's amusement, and that he was still just as deeply at his mercy here than if he was still in his old cell.

The days Ichiou came to _'visit'_ him, Kaname couldn't help but remember the past horrors even more vividly. He sometimes couldn't help but feel amazed that he did retain his sanity after all. There were days were it seemed unbelievable that he'd survived such an ordeal and only lost his pride, self-respect and other such things in the process.

And then, Ichiou would lay his fingers on Kaname's skin, and the abject terror spiking through the pureblood's body would make him question that idea, suddenly unsure whether he _had_ really kept his sanity or whether this entire world around him was nothing but a living nightmare, and he was still shackled to the dirty cot, screaming himself hoarse and choking in his sobs ten years ago, under Ichiou's bucking hips.

And Ichiou knew _exactly_ the extent of his power over Kaname. He knew exactly what it took to break him all over again, all the pieces of the pureblood's abused conscience falling apart under the right words and actions.

Each and every single time he visited Kaname, not only did he remind him exactly of the power he held over him, but he broke him all over again, leaving nothing but devastation in his wake when he left.

After each of those visits, which were scheduled in advance and lasted considerably longer than any normal customer's, the young pureblood was usually out of commission for a whole day to recover. Not because the 'house' cared in any way for his mental or physical health, but because Kaname was so terribly damaged mentally and physically after Ichiou left, that he wasn't fit to see anyone, not presentable to a customer nor even sane enough to be used by them, as he was very much unable to comprehend orders or comply to them, often enough unable to even stand, reduced to a curled up heap of sobbing misery.

--

Elsewhere, in an apartment of the upper areas of the city, where a number of the more renowned hunter clans lived, Zero was sitting at the desk in his room. He was trying to concentrate on some papers for the Association, but just couldn't get his mind into it.

He kept thinking back of a particular thing the old man at the desk of the 'house' had told him.

He'd said that he could come back the next day, but that the customer with Kaname was 'special', and _very demanding_, so they couldn't risk making a reservation or book the pureblood in advance for a customer wanting to see him just afterwards, because they couldn't guarantee that he'd be in condition to service someone right away, nor could they know exactly how many hours it might take before he was presentable again…

Zero knew that many of his fellow hunters were extremely rough with slaves, and it wasn't all that uncommon for some to torture them for fun --some even going to the houses more for that than merely for sexual services--, but vampires healed fast, especially purebloods… _So for it to be that bad, how rough was that customer?!_

Zero kept telling himself that it must be common practice or the house wouldn't accept having their merchandise regularly damaged, but the whole situation was already exceptional anyway, and he couldn't help but keep going back to that thread of worry for the pureblood, that was still in his mind.

He didn't even really realize it on a conscious level, but he found himself remembering the vampire's lightly flushed face, and the way those sad eyes would look down, hands seizing the bedsheets tightly to conceal the way his fingers were shaking. The pureblood looked so utterly vulnerable at that moment that Zero had felt that he might break like glass if he'd touched him. He felt so bad for him, for the horrible life he lead, for the obvious way he feared the customers' touches, that he hadn't been able to bring himself to touch him in the way he'd meant to when he walked into the room.

And now, that same feeling that had made him unable to touch him back then was making him dread what might be happening to the poor pureblood at this exact moment.

He had made the decision to go and sleep with him after all, because he'd more or less managed to convince himself –his hormones were a considerable help in that task-- that as long as he didn't torture him or anything, there was nothing wrong with the act itself, considering what slaves were for. …But that somehow didn't change the fact that he was very much worried of what that 'demanding customer' might do to the pureblood. One could hear many stories of people who would go out of their way for the sole purpose to cause exceptional pain to the vampire slaves, so nothing would really surprise Zero, or at least the hunter thought. But each attempt of his reason to shoo away the thoughts was faced with a renewed worry for the vampire.

Realizing the source of his inability to concentrate, Zero felt more than a bit miffed, which in turn led him to wonder if he wasn't maybe overreacting. After all, it was one thing to be intrigued by the vampire because he seemed different from what he'd expected… it was another thing altogether to let such thoughts go far enough that it started disturbing his life. _Especially when he had only met him once and didn't even know if his impression was accurate or if he'd simply been fooled by the bloodsucker._

Could it have been all an act because the pureblood had sensed Zero's inexperience and played with it to get out of it easy? The hunter mused, recalling each moment and over-analyzing every glance and word of the other. There was no way to be sure, with vampires, after all. And purebloods were _extremely_ cunning. Hadn't that same one read through Zero so easily and poured him a bath before the hunter had even voiced a single word on the subject?

He shrugged off the strange ideas as best as he could, determined to not let a bloodsucker insinuate himse- …_itself_ into his thoughts like that.

He rubbed his eyes, glancing at the longcase clock against the wall. _Ichiru was still not home?!_

The younger twin had been spending more and more time out of home as the years passed, but Zero never quite got used to it, feeling weird all by himself in the apartment they shared, and worrying whenever Ichiru was late or told him to eat by himself and not wait for him.

It was ironical really, because in theory, Ichiru was the weaker one, the one who depended on Zero for so much, but in truth, Zero himself was terribly dependent of his brother, always worried about whether Ichiru was doing fine or not, whether his health was getting better, whether he might be angry if Zero asked too many questions or intruded in his privacy or anything. Ichiru could be very secretive, and hated people prying in his personal life... even his twin. So Zero hesitated on and on.  
Zero may be the active-duty hunter and official head of the household, but in truth, his love for his brother and the guilt he still now felt for what he did before they were even born ruled much of his life.

The twins had been living in that apartment for four years now, at first under the guardianship of their teacher, a renowned hunter named Yagari, who'd trained them as children and then helped them after the death of their parents, dropping by every day and making sure that the twins were eating and taking care of themselves properly, as constantly present as his missions allowed him to be, at least until the boys reached their coming of age, which for hunters happened between the ages of 15 and 16.

The twins lived now mostly by themselves if you didn't count the fact that Yagari would still often hang around, the twins' apartment practically an extension of his own place since he'd often drop by uninvited and with no particular reason, welcomed with open arms by Zero, who viewed him as a sort of fatherly figure even if the two of them were rather too shy to mention things in such an open way. Yagari simply _was there_ for them, regularly present as an indivisible part of their lives, or more exactly, of Zero's life, since Ichiru had dropped off hunter training a while before and had grown more and more distant with the years, claiming he was busy trying to get himself a life where his strength as a hunter wouldn't be needed, when in truth, he just didn't want to be around Yagari and Zero too much.

Inevitably, Zero always thought that Ichiru avoided them because Yagari and the training reminded him too much of all the things that –by Zero's fault—Ichiru couldn't have. The guilt burned tenfold for Zero, in those moments.

Of course, he had no way to know that there were much darker reasons why Ichiru wanted to spend so much time out of their home… But Zero was too trusting to have even thought of counter-checking whether Ichiru really spent his time at the places he claimed he did.

Zero glanced at the clock again and felt tempted to call his brother, as it was getting more and more late. But Ichiru did often return late, and hated being disturbed when he was busy, so Zero hesitated to call him, even on his cell phone.

He was a bit angry at himself that his foolish worries for the vampire earlier had made him miss the fact that his twin, the flesh of his flesh, was still out there doing who-knows-what at such an hour.  
Well, not exactly who-knows-what, as he'd told Zero where he would be and all, but still.

If he should be worried about anyone, it should be Ichiru –regardless of the fact that Ichiru wasn't even an active-duty hunter, and was hardly at great risk—not some bloodsucker!

In turn, the anger Zero felt at himself crossed over and made him feel angry at the pureblood, unconsciously resenting him for distracting him that way.

The hunter told himself that this little obsessive bout could only be caused by the fact that he'd wasted his chance last time, and so he made the firm decision to immediately go to the house as soon as he could get off work the next day, and finally rent the pureblood for a few hours, this time to actually go and take him, as many times and in as many ways as it may take for this nonsensical little obsession of sorts to cease at last.

Inevitably, the decision triggered a new flurry of rather _interesting_ mind images that left the hunter in a dire need for another cold shower at the idea of the various sorts of depraved things he envisioned doing to the pureblood, both for the sake of pleasure simply, and also for a little payback for getting him so enticed in just one meeting.

Unknown to Zero, back in the blood district, Kaname was reaching the deepest spheres of despair.

.

.

.

_[tbc]_

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_"Funeral of hearts", by HIM. :D It's an awesome song, and "an ode for cruelty" (this chapter's title) is a chunk from the lyrics. :D_

_I'm sure you recognized the three vampires in the display window, by the way? ^^/  
_

**_NOTE:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,_**_ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
Zero still grew up among hunters, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and was never turned into a vampire, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:** take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons, although I don't know yet if the ages will be AU to be older back at the time of the war or not.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

* * *


	5. The warmth of your arms saved me

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 5 – With the warmth of your arms you saved me.**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU.**__Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and lemons from time to time__.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_I'm late with the review replies, but I'll try replying to both chapters' reviews before this weekend. The next chapter is also going to be posted this weekend. ;)  
I post the review replies in my forums here, in the "Cradle of Blood review replies" topic, which you can access through my profile. ^^/_

_This chapter turned out longer, but I didn't want to cut in the middle of that scene, especially since this is an important chapter because it's a big turning point for Zero... :)_

* * *

.

.

Zero had spent the past half an hour eyeing regularly the round clock on the wall of the office his unit occupied at the Hunter Association. He'd already glanced up at it several times for the past few minutes, waiting for the moment where it would look less indecent to drop all he was doing and rush out. He stopped finally when one of his colleagues noticed and cracked a joke about him being in a hurry to go meet a girl.

It was a slow day, and he just couldn't wait to be able to go find the tempting pureblood at the 'house' and put to practice the torrid ideas he was having the previous night.

Although he'd hate to admit where he was going or what for, especially since there was a big chance some of the others might want to tag along for the trip or –just as bad if not worse—ask countless questions and practically expect a report of his nocturnal activities later, so he tried to be discreet and avoid unwanted attention.

The younger hunters were organized in groups, and when they were not out in missions tracking down survivors from the war or level E's still wandering through the wilderness and occasionally popping up at the edges of the populated areas, they used those offices at the Headquarters to take care of paperwork and reports from the various hunts and the such.

There were still away missions regularly; the war may have ended a while ago, but it was brutal enough to have left considerable numbers of level E's loose in the world. Before the war, level D's had been entirely under the control of the vampire nobles, which resulted in hunters pretty much having to intervene only when one –still D or freshly turned to E-- managed to escape.  
Now that there wasn't any more a vampire aristocracy or any organized vampire society to regulate such things, the hunters had to take care of wiping them all out whenever they got reports that a group was found or had approached a village.

Those were the most frequent cases, as actual sane survivors were rather rare, especially among the higher spheres of the vampire society, which had been the first to be imprisoned. The hunters had played their game really well at the end of the war, wiping out the excess numbers, capturing purebloods and high-profile nobles and enslaving them before the war was even over yet, using them as hostages to draw out whoever felt any loyalty towards them.

The outrage the crumbling vampire society had felt at the news had been unprecedented, but it was too late in the war and rather than invigorating their forces with fury, it was the last spasms before the vampires' last strength expired.

Few had managed to resist the bait, especially among the more loyal circles supporting the former vampire monarchy.

And once the war was over, the hunters institutionalized the slavery, decreeing that the ranks were abolished –nevermind that those had never been merely political for vampires, and were actually based on purity of blood and subsequent power— and organizing the system that had the Hunter Association overseeing all slave transactions. Technically any slave ownership functioned a little like a license, in that the slave belonged entirely to its owner, but ultimately the Hunter Association could always intervene. The Association could reassign slaves and void deals as it pleased, provided that it had a good enough reason to believe that their rules weren't being followed. Those were rare cases though, since the word of the master was law and ruled over a slave's life or death completely. Only in cases where the owner was suspected of leniency towards the slave was there any danger of the Association intervening.

The vampires had initially believed that such a folly could never come true, and that the hunter's delusions of grandeur would come crushing down, thinking the slavery system would never truly be possible.  
But the anti-vampire charms in their restraints and the drugs their blood was pumped full off to block the use of their power were extremely real, and soon what had formerly been the top of the food chain realized with dread exactly what the hunters had meant by _'abolishing the ranks'…_

Those drugs in particular were an ace up the hunters' sleeve, something they'd been developing in secret long before the war even started, and which they tested first in weaponized form during the last battles of the war. That was how the most powerful vampires had been ambushed or captured in battle, something absolutely unthinkable until then. In some cases, purebloods and high-rank nobles had been lured out with promises of peace negotiations, and then ambushed mercilessly.  
And now it came in very handy to control the slave population as well…

In this new world, no vampire could access their power, dulled by the drugs, and thus purebloods had no edge over anyone else. They were merely considered_ 'better'_ than the others because of their beauty and a number of things that made them more desirable at the hunters' hungry eyes –particularly their most convenient ability to heal even faster than the other ranks if given blood. But it stopped there, they were not better treated than the others nor did they have any power over anyone...

If anything, purebloods were worse off than the lower ranks, which held considerably less appeal at the eyes of their captors. High-nobility vampires were also in a terribly dire situation.

The way the post-war hunter society viewed vampires was, to say the least, extreme. They'd always considered them nothing more than beasts that needed to be put down, but now that they had the option to enslave them rather than kill them, the hatred they felt for the vampire race stayed in place, but the instinctive fear disappeared since the vampires couldn't fight anymore. Quickly, that fear was replaced with a cruelly brutal lust, authoritative and unforgiving, demanding an unparalleled level of submission.

Vampires were not allowed names, couldn't speak unless ordered to --and even then it was largely limited, and often reduced to certain deferential expressions they were forced to say if asked anything, to further drive in the fact that they were no longer free.

Enough years had passed that even the most rebellious ones had broken down, countless prisoners losing their sanity or dying in the process, especially among the weaker specimens and the ones whose pride made the transition so much harder.

Things hadn't always been as simple. At the beginning, shortly after the war ended and the hunters implemented the system they intended to have for the vampire's new life, there had been countless rebellious attempts --none being successful, however.  
Even drugged and restrained, even knowing that there was nothing much they could do, the prisoners still had absolutely refused to comply, and resisted with what little they had.

It had taken quite a while to break some of them, especially the more proud ones, too used to the world they lived in to possibly accept the idea of slavery, especially sexual slavery.  
Level D's were often exterminated like vermin if they tried anything, level C's figured out that the tide of this world had turned definitively and that this would be the only way to survive, so the majority of them complied readily enough.

The aristocracy was much harder to force into submission, but once the hunters succeeded in breaking even the spirit of pureblooded vampires, all else followed quite easily. Torture and higher drug dosages had also considerably helped in the forced taming of the highest ranks.

In fact, purebloods had somehow been an incidental accessory in the breaking of the vampire aristocracy. Shortly after the war, hunters often assigned together purebloods with groups of nobles that had been in their following before and during the war, which would have been a dangerous move if the vampires had any chance of effectively rebelling, but since they were constantly drugged and restrained, they couldn't use the situation to their advantage. Instead, whenever one of the aristocrats misbehaved, the one at fault wasn't the only one to be punished. The aristocrats were dealt their punishment and then forced to watch as the pureblood they had once claimed to serve was tortured as well, often even more than the culprit himself had been.  
Quickly, the aristocrats begun to comply more and fell to obedience, if anything to give their pureblood a respite.

Over the years, as the spirit of the prisoners broke more and more, that wasn't even needed anymore, and so the sales ceased to be done in groups. Slaves were considered equal regardless of the rank they may have held before the war, and as such they were now sold freely to whoever could pay for the fixed purchase fees set up by the Association, and the upkeep expenses due to the regular purchases of drugs and so on – although truth to be said, with the proper amount of leverage and bribes they could be purchased separate at any time even before.

The other vampire ranks still may have ingrained instincts of respect towards purebloods, but none dared to follow such instincts when it was against the newer but brutally set in place order of things created by the hunters. And tragically enough, a great number of the lower ranks held a grudge against the purebloods, and rejected such instincts out of the unfounded feeling that purebloods should have protected the vampire society as a whole from the hunters, and that it was their failure that had led to the slavery. In truth, the purebloods were even more victims than the others, but the loser in a war is often bitter, even more so when it results in such dramatic societal changes, so it's perhaps inevitable for them to search for anything or anyone to lay the blame on.

Some of the more fortunate hunters, who were able to afford access to one or more pureblood slaves, had pushed things as far as having demonstrations of the power of their new rule – in the old world, how impossible to imagine would it have been, lower rank vampires gang-raping a pureblood? In this new world where they were all stripped of whatever advantage nature might have given them, it was not only perfectly possible, but a rare show enjoyed in certain parties.

The very only thing that the ones among the former nobility who still felt any loyalty for the purebloods could do to honor their fallen royalty was to divert their eyes to avoid shaming them further by watching the most humiliating displays. And even that wasn't always possible.

Inevitably, Zero remembered the three vampires looking worried in the display window of the 'house' the previous day. From the looks on their faces and the way they occasionally stole glances at the pureblood's empty chair, Zero was pretty sure they must be one of the very rare cases of former vampire nobility that still felt loyal to the purebloods, or at least to the one closest at hand.  
The younger-looking vampire in the trio, a blue eyed little blond, had seemed particularly miserable, a look of deep despair completely filling his striking blue eyes when he'd shot a quick glance at the chair. They probably hadn't expected that the hunter outside would be paying attention to their feelings or expressions, but Zero had seen, and he was pretty sure they knew what the pureblood was going through, whatever it was.  
He couldn't help but feel a renewed surge of worry at the thought, however much that worry was still mingled with inevitable lustful urges, which were precisely the reason why he wanted to go back to the 'house' in the first place.

At long last, the clock chimed, striking its musical little bells to indicate the hour, and Zero bolted from his table, grabbing his jacket and waving to his colleagues, pretending that he had an appointment as he disappeared into the corridor, hoping to vanish before they'd asked any questions. They were good people, but awfully prone to gossip, especially in times of peace, and Zero would rather not be fodder for their theories. His lack of girlfriend already fueled his friends attempts to match him with random people he didn't even know, and Zero hated people prying in his life and trying to decide things for him, however well intentioned they may be.

The exception for that was of course his twin Ichiru, who was close enough and had enough of an upper hand over Zero –the hunter's guilt—to be able to randomly demand things and have Zero concede each time. But luckily, so far Ichiru had been more concerned with his own life and shown no interest in pairing Zero up with anyone or meddling in his love-life, so the hunter could only hope his twin wouldn't join the ranks of the well-intentioned meddlers trying to introduce him to some random chick they'd met in some random place.

--

Zero made it to the 'house' as they were just opening for the evening, and rushed for the desk right away.

Both the old woman and her husband were there this time, setting up various things and opening the cashier section for the night.

At first, the woman was a bit surprised that there was a customer for the pureblood so early and considering that he was still out of commission, but her husband piped in to say he'd talked to the young hunter already the previous day.

Apparently, whenever that 'special customer' visited, the pureblood would be taken out _'for repairs'_ afterwards –meaning they'd have him drink the blood of a less useful slave so that he'd heal faster– and then he was put back to work later in that evening if the damage was not too bad, or, much more often the next day if it was bad enough that they had to wait for him to be healed enough to be presentable.  
The drugs that all vampires were regularly given to block their powers made their healing terribly slowed down, and thus the blood was a necessity.

However, the owners were both rather greedy, and neither minded much if the pureblood had to work in a trashed state. The only reason why they bothered sending him to heal was because he couldn't perform his duties properly in his current state. But since this customer insisted greatly that he didn't mind passing right after the other man, nor minded that the slave was wounded, the couple behind the counter just eyed each other and shrugged, handing Zero the customary little form to fill and sign, before an attendant accompanied him to the pureblood's room.

In front of the door, the attendant stopped, asking Zero to wait a little bit while he assessed the state of things – apparently, the customer who had been with Kaname had left just moments before Zero arrived, and no one had checked on the pureblood's state yet.

Zero nodded and watched the door close as the man disappeared into the room. The lights were dimmed and the hunter couldn't spot the pureblood when the door had been open, but his hunter senses were keen and told him of the presence of the vampire inside. Quickly, hearing took over and let him know that Kaname had probably been on the ground somewhere, as he heard the handler who had gone inside ordering the vampire to get up. There was no reply, and the man kept insisting, more and more roughly. Zero quickly realized that the handler was actually attempting to beat the pureblood into getting up, and opened the door, rushing inside as well to stop the abuse.

As Zero had feared when he heard the noises, Kaname was on the ground while the attendant pulled him by an arm and kicked him to try and get him to obey the injunction to get up.

"That won't be necessary. As I've told the house owners, I don't mind his current state. You may leave now."

"But sir, it would be inacceptable for a slave to disobey just because he's _a little bit _wounded…"

"Well, it looks more to me that he's unable to get up rather than disobeying… and either way, I've paid for this time already, and I don't intend to waste a second more of it. You may leave us like I said, and I'll make sure that he obeys me just fine."

Anyone with an ounce of common sense would have accepted the obvious fact that the naked pureblood curled up on the ground next to the foot of the disarrayed bed couldn't be farther from faking the pain that was shaking his whole body, but it was common for handlers to mistreat slaves on the assumption they were just unwilling to obey, even when they truly couldn't physically do anything to get up.  
And since the house owners would assume the damage was caused by the client who just left and not notice the additional damage caused by an employee's misbehavior, the lower rank handlers could get away with a lot, and often did, especially just after a customer left. Since many of them chose to work in such places precisely because they already had a pronounced sadistic streak, it was often particularly bad on wounded slaves.

Zero's words were perfectly chosen though, letting the man know that the customer was firmly decided, and that it was a matter of money and paid time –which the handler understood very well—rather than a matter of being permissive with a vampire, which would have been shocking and inacceptable in the current society.

Zero may be a trifle idealistic, but he was also very intelligent, and knew how to get what he wanted when he had to.

Reluctantly, the attendant let go of the pureblood's wrist which he'd been holding while trying to force him up, and walked to the exit, with a last regretful glance towards the slave.  
The man wasn't very successful in his job, being excessively cruel even for a handler, and having been fired of another house already for unnecessarily damaging the merchandise to the point that they had to send them out for 'repairs' without being able to pass the costs off onto a customer. Now that he was working in a place that actually had a pureblood, he'd been looking forward to having some _'fun' _with him in between his special customer's visit and the evening hours, but this new customer's sudden arrival had ruined his plans, and now he couldn't even vent off on the slave a little. He sighed with a look of annoyance and walked out though, knowing better than foolishly trying to argue with a paying customer, much less one that was an active-duty hunter. Zero may be young and very much still low on the food chain within the Hunter Association hierarchy, but compared to a mere handler or even a hunter not on active duty, he could pull rank, if he needed to, and the handler wouldn't dare go against someone who could easily get him in trouble.

The hunter closed the door soundly after he was done shooing out the man, and quickly walked across the room towards the prone form in the ground.

The pureblood was curled up into a ball, trembling hard, choked sobs slipping past his lips unchecked, along with his strangled breathing coming out in gasping pants, half from the uneven sobbing and half from the fact that he was bleeding from his nose and unable to breathe that way. Other cuts elsewhere on his face and body were still bleeding also, but the dried blood caked on his skin indicated that it was caused by the 'special' customer, and not by the few seconds the handler had spent trying to force him to get up.

Zero was shocked enough that he froze in his steps when he saw the extent of the damage. The pureblood's body was covered in raised welts and scrapes, having apparently been viciously whipped and beaten. Bruises marred his skin to a point that was painful to see, the clusters of bluish-purpleish marks stemming from his joints and other places where he'd apparently been tied down. A larger web of dark bruises circled his knees and his wrists, and irregular clusters of them were on his hips, backside, inner thighs…

Ichiou had the strength of a hunter, no doubt about it. More than the average hunter by far, considering the amount of pure vampire blood he'd had access to over the years. And Kaname was so drained and weakened that he'd probably bruise more easily even if he hadn't had the anti-vampire drugs cutting down his healing and preventing him from accessing his powers. With them, it was downright a massacre on his weakened body.

A number of gashes were fresher than the others and bleeding sluggishly. So was the pureblood's nose, and Zero noticed a worrisome amount of blood streaked between the vampire's legs and looking fresh too, which shouldn't have surprised him as much as it did, considering the nature of the place and what the customers came here for.

Once he got closer, the hunter was even more shocked. With most of the lights in the room being off it was dim enough that he hadn't seen at first all the fluids soiling various areas of the pureblood's skin, mixing with the blood, sweat and tears. _A single man did this?! He must have the stamina of a horse?!_

Zero was unsure of what to say in such a horrifying circumstance, but felt compelled to ask the pureblood if he would be okay.  
Kaname had apparently been so lost in the whirlpool of horror still tearing through his mind that at first he hadn't even realized that there was someone near him until the hunter uttered a concerned "hey…"

The reaction wasn't what Zero had expected though. Kaname very much jolted as if he'd been touched by a live wire, and the sudden movement tore a cry of pain from his lips.

The hunter was going to reach for him and excuse himself for having startled him, when Kaname tumbled to the side mumbling something hurriedly as he struggled to lift himself off the floor. After a moment of surprise, Zero was horrified to realize that the pureblood was frantically apologizing, disconnected and half incoherent as his words may be. Kaname was trying with all he had to get up, thinking he'd be further punished if he failed to properly receive a customer. But against his most desperate efforts, his body was betraying him, much too abused and much too weakened to have any strength left. He only managed to get on his elbows and partially shift his hips to the side before the lancinating pain made him crash down, biting his already split lower lip to hold back another cry of pain, which he feared might displease the customer –often enough the hunters were pleased by pain they had inflicted themselves, but angry at a display of weakness that another had caused, deeming that the slave was just 'being lazy' or disobedient if they weren't serviced right away.

Zero couldn't understand, and for a moment he just went on staring in horror as the pureblood tried to get up. Kaname hadn't stopped apologizing yet, blurting out the usual formulas that the houses forced the vampires to recite, except that he was currently too shaken to even think straight, and his words were coming off truncated and incoherent, his mind completely muddled by the pain and the mental horror he'd just gone through. Only a part of him actually realized where he was and reacted mostly on instinct based on previous experiences. The rest of his mind was lost and thinking it might be a new game Ichiou was playing. He just frantically reacted as best as he could to the situation at hand, not even knowing what he was supposed to do and just falling back to the old habits the 'house' had beaten into him over the years, instinct taking over and telling him he had to get up at any cost or the punishment would be much worse.

At last, Zero snapped out of the shocked daze caused by the sight of the wounded pureblood desperately begging for forgiveness while still trying to get up on his knees, and reached forward, catching Kaname as the pureblood slipped and fell a second time, this time having nearly managed to rise himself a bit higher off the ground.

The hunter only registered a bit too late that his clothes were now in full contact with the blood and other much worse stuff all over the pureblood's skin, but he couldn't bring himself to mind at the moment, too concerned for the broken form in his arms. Kaname shrank back weakly in the hunter's hold, visibly still afraid.

"Shh, shh, calm down! You don't have to get up! It's me, the guy who came the other day, remember? I won't hurt you, so calm down."

He was quite sure the vampire would remember him, considering the rather exceptional way their meeting went, and considering that –in all modesty—Zero knew he often made a memorable impression on people, with his unusual color of hair and eyes.

He pulled Kaname closer, trying to get him off the ground without jarring him too much, but the pureblood wasn't sure what was happening, and was still shaking hard, unable to stop hiccupping and sobbing even as he continued to apologize with stumbling words. The hunter pulled back a little, making sure to make eye contact, before repeating the reassurances, and then he finally understood. It wasn't a matter of Kaname not having noticed who it was yet… the pureblood was looking straight at him as if he didn't see him, still sobbing out broken apologies before averting his gaze to not disrespect the hunter.

Kaname was actually semi-conscious, and so very much out of everything that he had no idea who was with him, and _completely_ failed to recognize the hunter holding him.

_So much for having thought I made an impression on him._

There was a tiny pang in Zero's pride, but it was of little importance at the face of the present situation. The hunter slid an arm around the pureblood's back and another beneath his knees, hoping it wouldn't hurt them too much –they were swollen and terribly bruised—before lifting him and carrying him towards the bathroom.

The bathtub was still full and hot, but that told Zero that it must have been used by the previous customer, and the revulsion for what the man had done made him feel it would be wrong to bathe the pureblood in that water, slave or not. He emptied the bathtub, still holding the semi-conscious vampire with his other arm, and poured out clean water to wash away the tub before carefully depositing his charge on the warm porcelain surface.

Kaname shuddered, unsure of what was happening, but instinctually not daring to balance himself by clinging onto the unknown person holding him, too used to being punished if he did something he wasn't expressly told to. He held onto the border of the bathtub with a hand instead, trying to prop himself up with the other, but failing because he didn't have the strength. He just half-lay and half-sat, body curled up against the side of the tub, shivering hard and still unable to stop sobbing, his legs and arms shaking hard.

The deeply dazed but still conscious little part left in the back of his mind was in over-drive with worry, both because he had no idea what was happening, and because he was utterly failing at servicing a customer, which worried him to no end due to the prospect of what would be done to him later for punishment. The 'houses' prided themselves in their service, and the slightest complaint against a slave was dealt with with exemplary severity, to dissuade others from disobeying or providing poor services.

The hunter picked up the small portable shower-head and unhooked its tube off the handle on the wall, before testing the warmth of the water on his hand and starting to wash the grime and blood off the pureblood's legs.

Kaname yelped softly when the water touched his skin, not having realized it was on nor having expected it. A part of him had registered that they were in the bathroom, but rational thinking was really not his forte at the moment. He shrank against the wall of the bathtub, whimpering softly and trying to pull his legs closer.

Zero had come to the 'house' with completely different intentions, but now that he'd seen the pureblood in such a state, he was burning with anger at the previous customer, and with guilt at his own lustful urges that had led him to return to the place. He wouldn't have brutalized the slave the way the other man did, but the simple thought that he may be in any way comparable to the man who'd done this to the pureblood utterly disgusted him to no end. Vampires were supposed to be the ones who were beasts, but what could one call someone who did something so brutal to a sentient being? Beasts driven by their basest instincts… If there was one thing Zero would never want to be, was anything like that. He burned with guilt at the idea that he'd been considering bedding Kaname just because everybody else did it freely. In his mind, he felt as guilty as if he'd done what the others did, considering that he had been so close to it.

He'd been torn by contradictory ideas and urges all along. His instinctive kindness told him that taking someone unwilling was rape regardless of whether the victim was a slave or not, and a human or a beast. And yet, his hunter upbringing told him that vampires were repulsive beasts who deserved nothing more than a gruesome death.

But Zero was a caregiver by nature, and the wounded form curled up in front of him seemed anything but a beast.

He knew, he tried to remind himself that vampires only _looked_ human, that evolution had made them identical to humans so that they could prey on the later… but at the moment, however much that may be the truth… there was no doubt whatsoever that the pureblood's pain was completely real, and that he was anything but a predator at the moment. In fact, he was so much the prey that it was painful to see. And Zero's heart was deeply moved by the plight of someone who had no hope or chances left by anyone else.

It was the turning point, for him. The decisive incident that made the young hunter tip over the edge between wondering whether the society he grew up in was right, or what the voice of his conscience whispered.  
Anyone outside might think him a complete fool for doing what he was doing –and wasting his money in the process of spending time there as well--, but he couldn't care less. If they were deluded enough to think that brutally raping someone was right –vampire or not, beast or not, as long as it had feelings and suffered like that, it was still a "someone" rather than a "something"—, then whatever they thought meant nothing at his eyes.

However much he might be a hunter and the creature in front of him a vampire, natural born enemies, Zero would never abide by the way they had treated the pureblood.

The hunter set down the little shower-head and stood for a moment, pulling off his jacket and clothes, realizing that he'd get all wet if he tried to wash the pureblood while all dressed. To not scare him further, he wrapped a towel around his own waist, concealing that which he imagined the other might have come to associate with pain rather than pleasure, and stepped into the bathtub, which was large enough that it was closer to the size of a Jacuzzi than that of a conventional bathtub. The hunter crouched at the bottom of it and pulled the pureblood closer, shifting him gently so that Kaname leaned into the reassuring warmth of his chest rather than curl up against the hard wall of the tub.

The pureblood continued shivering softly, but let himself be handled without reaction, pliantly complying by lack of being able to more actively obey the customer. The skin to skin contact was strangely reassuring, something that was most unexpected for the pureblood.

Then, he reacted to the hunter's scent, finally realizing that it was the person who gave him blood two days before. Zero was holding him with one arm behind his back to support him, while using the other hand to run the shower head over the pureblood's body, pouring the warm water onto Kaname's pale and bruised skin.

Kaname made a little strangled noise, burrowing closer to the other, and Zero realized that he was more conscious now, perhaps slowly brought back to reality by the feeling of the water sluicing over his body.  
Hooking the shower head back onto the wall on a lower hook just above the bathtub level, the hunter poured on his hand some silky rose-scented liquid soap, and begun to carefully run his soapy hand along the pureblood's side, hoping to keep his touch non-threateningly gentle rather than sensual.

To Zero's surprise, rather than feeling reassured, the pureblood started to shake harder.

If Zero had been a vampire, he'd have realized sooner, but while hunters did have senses more attuned than that of the average human, it was nowhere near a vampire's sense of smell, so he only noticed the fresh tears running down the pureblood's face when he pulled back to check on him after Kaname let out another strangled sob.

The pureblood was a bit more himself now, or at least as coherent as one could be in one such situation. He was curled up against the hunter's side where Zero was still holding him, but the way his body was positioned made it seem that he was trying his very best to avoid much contact, and would rather have been merely curled up against the bathtub. Little shivers were racking his frame, and fresh tears ran down his face freely, his garnet eyes already reddened from crying too much and glistening with new moisture, the dark lashes heavy with tears and beautifully long.

Even hunters –no, perhaps _especially_ hunters, nowadays—knew exactly how taboo a pureblood's tears were. It was the stuff of mythology, practically.  
Although in this day and age, it was much more frequently seen, and far from mythological. Many people purposefully went out of their way to cause those tears by any means.  
But it was usually done through torture, mental or physical. Seeing it come out naturally, in a moment that should have been comforting rather than frightening was unexpected for the hunter. Or perhaps, it was just that Zero was still naïve enough to have expected that he could make it all better, and that his gentleness would soothe the abused pureblood and wash away the pain as he was washing away the filth that clung to his body.

Zero stared at that wounded beauty, unsure of what he'd done wrong to hurt the pureblood and prompt the new sadness tearing at him now.

Kaname answered that unspoken question, covering his face and head with his forearms, curling down further as the tears ran down his cheeks, and uttering out broken words. "Don't do this to me… I don't know why you're here, but please please don't do _this_…"

He wouldn't have voiced the thought at all if he'd been more in control of himself, as he knew much too well that asking anything of a hunter, even if worded like a plea rather than a request was a certain way to get in even more trouble. But at the present moment, he was much too lost and desperate, and the words just slipped out of his lips.

Zero didn't understand, though, and tried to reassure him.

"Don't worry… I won't hurt you, I just want to wash you."

"Why…? Why are you doing this? You don't have to be nice to me. No one is ever nice to me without… without…"

A flurry of horrible memories flooded his system, and the pureblood slid down a little further, shrinking back against the side of the bathtub.  
Zero didn't let him slip away though, following along and still firmly holding him, which unfortunately only seemed to make the pureblood even more nervous.

"Kaname…?"

Zero had hoped that calling the pureblood by his name might help calm him, but rather than reacting to that, Kaname went on, choking out his words between sobs, breathing raggedly as he tried to speak through the dizzy haze that was still heavily clinging to him.  
"I can't understand… why you are nice to me… But it will only hurt _so much more_. Please… please just let me be… I can't take that much more… If you're nice to me, the pain will be so much more unbearable when you finally… finally break the mask…"

Zero was shocked into silence. The pureblood curled into himself more, belatedly realizing through the fog that still tampered with his reasoning that the thoughts he'd voiced aloud were very much the same as foolishly sentencing himself to the worst, revealing to his probable next tormentor the best way to strike him, making it all even more obvious than it already was. _Yet another failure to add to the already spectacular list!!_ The pureblood winced, a renewed wave of self-loathing sweeping through his body at the thought of all he already held against himself, especially the more recent surrender under Ichiou's torture. _He had done it again. As he always ended up doing._ He'd broken down again and again, lost in the darkness. And he loathed himself for every single one of those failures. A choked sob slipped from his lips, and he clenched his jaw so hard that if he had his real strength he might have broken it, if not for the fact that the drugs and the abuse had made his body currently too weak to possibly bite hard enough to cause any damage.

To Kaname's surprise, a gentle touch brought him momentarily back from his dark thoughts. Zero had pulled him closer, in a sort of a hug-like embrace despite their awkward position in the bathtub.

"There's no mask to break, Kaname. I'm being sincere with you. And I have no intentions of hurting you."

For almost a year after the murder of his parents, Zero would occasionally have nightmares about the incident, seeing over and over the bloody scene he had happened upon when his brother and him returned home. He'd torture himself with the idea that maybe, just maybe, if he hadn't listened to Ichiru and gone out that day, if only he'd been there, he could have done something to prevent it, or he could have _tried to,_ at least.  
Whenever he had been like that, Ichiru would hold him in his arms and caress his hair until he'd calm down. Eventually, Zero had gotten better, and accepted the fact that he couldn't change the past, and that it was better that they hadn't been there after all – if they had been, and the vampire woman had killed or worse, turned Ichiru, Zero would never forgive himself for having taken his twin into danger.

He eventually managed to learn to live with the loss of his parents only because he had his twin next to him, holding him each time the nightmares would come for him, reassuring him until he could sleep again. Zero felt bad for depending so much on Ichiru when his twin was also going through the same trauma, but Ichiru, albeit weak in his body, was stronger than he seemed, and they ended up making it out of that period, because they had each other.

But Kaname had no one like that. In fact, he seemed to have no one_ at all_.

So Zero couldn't help but respond to the terrible pang he felt in his heart for the pureblood, and cradled him closer, holding his head against his chest in a reassuring manner, his other hand sliding up and down Kaname's arm in a soothing caress, the way Ichiru would caress him when he had felt miserable.

He was going by completely on instinct at the moment, trying his best to not think of the fact that it was a vampire he was holding in his arms so gently. But the pain practically radiating from the pureblood was impossible to ignore.

The hunter held the pureblood tightly, his touch gentle enough so that he wouldn't hurt him more by pressing any of the more bruised areas. The hand he had on the vampire's head was caressing his hair soothingly now, while the hunter whispered reassuring words by his ear.

Kaname couldn't understand what could motivate the hunter's gentleness, nor could he truly believe it to be sincere, not with all that he'd suffered during those ten years, in Ichiou's hands and in that of every hunter who had come to the 'house' for him.

But just now, just for one moment, maybe he could fool himself into believing that those gentle arms were sincere, and that this person holding him so kindly actually meant what he said and would make all the hurt go away. His shoulders quivered involuntarily, before his whole body begun shaking again, and finally, against his very best efforts, the pureblood broke down sobbing hard, burying his face into the other's arms and abandoning himself in his embrace, trusting him for the moment at hand at least, even if every single one of his instincts told him that the hunter would inevitably betray him later, like everybody did. He just didn't want to think of it now, couldn't possibly deal with it now without breaking down even worse. He was so far gone that he feared that breaking down any farther than he already had would result in not coming out of it this time, or coming out missing even more parts of himself than he already did. He'd lost so much over the years. If this proverbial plank preventing him from sinking turned out to be made of lead and dragged him down even deeper later, then so be it, but at the present moment Kaname desperately needed to fool himself into believing the hunter's words were real.

He went on sobbing, hair wet from tears and clinging to his face in ringlets, while the hunter washed him. Zero let the pureblood take care of the most _delicate_ areas himself, not wanting to touch him there and risk giving the vampire the impression that he had lied and had other intentions for him than merely washing him.

Kaname was slightly more alert by now, but he seemed groggy and from the way he was silent and just breathing shallowly, it was difficult to tell whether he was feeling better or about to break down further. He'd seemed to relax a little further while the hunter washed his hair, leaning into Zero's hands and looking like he might pass out into a much needed sleep, but he'd stayed awake after all.  
The flush on his skin gave the pureblood a feverish look, making Zero wonder if it could possibly be the case, due to the blood loss and the shock. The hunter was no doctor though, and could only make guesses while he finished rinsing off the pureblood's now clean skin, and helped him up.

Kaname's legs protested in agony, but he bit down the urge to groan in pain, and clung to the hunter as the latter helped him up. His bruised knees were killing him, and his muscles gave him a renewed wave of tearing pain when he insisted on stepping out of the bathtub on his own rather than being hoisted out in the hunter's arms. He didn't want to show how bad it was, afraid he'd already revealed himself far too much.

Zero held him by his forearms, carefully guiding the pureblood's movements so that he could step out and keep his balance.

Kaname hadn't taken two steps out of the bathtub before he crashed down on the ground, falling to his knees, his whole body refusing to go any further standing.

The hunter hadn't expected the sudden fall, not having fully realized just how much pain the pureblood was hiding, and being halfway in and halfway out of the still slippery bathtub himself, Zero didn't manage to catch Kaname on time before the vampire crashed to the ground.

Guilty confusion took over the hunter's features, but it was instantly replaced by surprise when, rather than staying down, the pureblood scrambled on his wounded knees fast, half stumbling and half crawling, falling back down and barely making it to the toilet and opening it on time before he retched violently, his whole body spasming in a mix of utter revulsion and just feeling horribly sick and miserable. A new wave came, and the pureblood was surprised to find that it was possible to feel even more sick than he already did.

His stomach was flip-flopping, and he found it hard to breathe while coughing and choking. He wheezed as he leaned over the toilet, his entire body throbbing with pain from the considerable abuse he'd suffered earlier, as well as from the additional pain when his already hurt knees had hit the hard marble ground.

And yet, if there was something he was glad for amidst all this misery, it was that by throwing up he would be rid of at least a part of the repulsive _marks_ the hateful ex-vampire had left within him. He would have stuck his fingers in his throat and forced himself to vomit if he hadn't thrown up naturally.  
He couldn't stand the idea of the man's filthy seed inside him, and wanted to get rid of it at any costs. It was always the case, each time that Ichiou came to _'visit'_ him, he'd inevitably be throwing up afterwards, either because his body was too shaken by the trauma, or because he forced himself to it, the times it didn't come naturally.

Even though he knew well that it was a futile thing, and that it was far too deep inside him, for far too many years for him to ever be clean of it again. For him to ever be clean of anything again. The way Kaname saw things, he was far too tainted to ever possibly stand in the light again. There was nothing but darkness on his path, forever and ever, or at least for as long as his tormentors could manage to force him to stay alive… or his own foolish hopes, that even he himself deeply believed were nothing but delusions.

_He went on living so that if one day things changed, and she ever needed him, he would be alive for her. _Or so he told himself, but that illusion had only truly lasted a few years, turning more and more to a bitter phantasm in his mind, as he broke down more and more and became far too lost in the belief that the world would no longer change, and there was no escape for him.

It took _a lot_ for a being that was practically immortal to break down to the point of thinking eternity wouldn't be enough to save him.

But Kaname had been taken at far too early of an age, much too soon for the years to sink in and let him develop a proper pureblood's outlook on such things. He may have a life expectancy that was practically forever, but he'd been dragged into despair far too deep and far too early to think he'd survive that long, or even to think that things could improve enough for it to actually matter.

New tears were welling up in his eyes, and he tried so hard to hold at least those back in. He shivered uncontrollably, sobs that he couldn't conceal racking his body as the cool air chilled his wet skin further. He jolted, startled when he felt a soft warmth wrap around him. The hunter had placed a plush towel over his shoulders, and was gently drying his back and arms. Against his best efforts, against all that his reason told him, the pureblood broke down once more, letting go of the sides of the toilet and leaning into the hunter's arms, sobbing unabashedly with his face buried against the man's chest, letting go of all the broken pieces of control he'd desperately tried to hold onto and failed. _If the hunter was going to break him even further later, then let it be. He'd deal with it later. He simply couldn't possibly think, at the moment._

He didn't know how long he'd cried, nor when his exhausted body finally passed out in the other's protective arms, unable to think anymore, or even care where he was or what would happen to him.

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_[tbc]_

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_Another line from a song by HIM as a chapter title. :D "Killing loneliness", a song that I find quite lovely for VK inspirational stuff. X3  
Sadly, there's a limit to the lenght of chapter titles here, so I had to change the order of the words a bit. The official title is the one in the top of the chapter, not in the drop down menu. ;) _

_I'll be posting chapter 6 this weekend, and hopefully manage to reply to all the reviews before then~ ^_^/ See you~!_

_**NOTE:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,**__ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
__Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname__ from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and __was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery__. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	6. Memories, sharp as daggers

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 6 – Memories, sharp as daggers.**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.__**  
**__**Warnings: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and lemons from time to time.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_*currently replying to reviews from previews chapters, will post the replies in the 'reviews replies' forum later* :D_

_This chapter was actually written a few weeks ago, as I always write them in advance to be able to still post if deadlines bury me suddenly or something, so it's hard to resist the temptation to post it all at once. ;D *lol* But then, it would also be way too long. As it is, it already is longer than some of the previous ones, but I didn't want to cut after the dream. That way, it can progress a bit farther sooner. :)_

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The pureblood tossed fitfully on the bed, hair splayed on the pillows, face tense, small drops of perspiration pearling to the surface of his forehead as the nightmare unfurled once again in his mind. He would usually dream of the past every so often, but it seemed that it happened more often when he was particularly weakened, the pain that tortured his body making his mind more vulnerable as well.

He relived in his sleep the events of ten years ago, seeing that fateful night once more. The blood splattered on the snow, the screams, the wood of the massive double doors of Kuran manor splintering with a sickening wailing noise before they caved in and the enemy armies flooded the grand hall.

_What for, had his parents fought for peace for so long? What for had they condemned the war and refused to take part in it? What for had they held onto their pacifist stance until the very end?_

Utmost irony, they were betrayed by the very same council the last Kuran King had set up… and by the flesh of their flesh, Kaname's uncle Rido.

And it was their own people who guided the hunter armies to them.

Worse yet, it was their own people who attacked the manor long before the enemy armies could even arrive to the place.

Kaname would never forget the grim determination on his parents' stoic faces, already before the attack, the moment their messengers returned with news that the war was indeed lost and that the horrendous rumors of the late were true: the hunters were reducing into an unspeakable form of slavery all the vampire survivors.

Life as a pureblood had already been hard and dangerous enough that those two had long before started dreaming of a world where their children may escape from it, but now things were countless times more dire and extreme.  
But the Kurans were powerful and decided. Juri had an idea, for which she'd long researched the ancient spells that their clan held secret. Haruka now whispered to her that perhaps the time for them to try it had come at last. Their eyes met as they exchanged a loving gaze, and Haruka squeezed Juri's hand lovingly, shared determination visible in their soft eyes.

Juri had then taken little Yuuki's hand and pulled her away, ushering her towards the southern wing of the house. Suddenly seized with a bad feeling at the sight, Kaname called out for his little sister. The little girl did the same, tiny hands reaching for her older brother desperately, calling out his name as her mother pulled her into her arms and carried her away. Kaname made to follow, but Haruka held onto his son's shoulder and pulled him back, preventing him from running after her, and the door shut, parting the two siblings. It was the last time Kaname saw his beloved sister as herself.

Haruka explained to Kaname in much too gentle, overly sugar coated words --which the boy felt he was too old to need, but in his father's eyes he would always be a little boy--, that they intended to do _something_ to Yuuki and him, that would ensure that they would have a future in that world, a future where they could be safe from the horror that would follow for their race.

They wanted their children to escape not merely this one conflict, but an eternity of worries and danger, escaping into the blissful freedom and peace of a world they could never achieve as purebloods. He didn't mention the price to pay, but Kaname knew, and a lump in his throat prevented him from saying a word, suddenly realizing with horror why his father had kept him close to him. Each of the pureblood parents intended to sacrifice themselves for their children...

Already, the couple had sent a messenger for an old friend of Juri's that they knew they could trust above anyone else… and to whom they intended to entrust their children, once the ritual the two purebloods intended to perform had turned their offspring human, making them finally safe from the hatred of the hunters.

The children were unsure of what exactly would happen –not even Kaname knew exactly how his parents were planning to go at it, as he didn't know exactly how the spell worked-- but they were separately ushered around and prepared, made to wear warm clothes and told to be ready for a quick escape when the moment would come.

But before the hunter armies arrived, the council's army did.

The war was lost, and rather than remain on the front fighting the last losing battle, they gathered and headed for the Kuran manor, to do the last bidding of their leader, Asato Ichijou – Ichiou.

The council had already fallen by now, but it wasn't an official matter anymore. Ichiou sent his men there for personal gain.

The moment where a storm turns is the one thing that is forever etched upon one's memory, that dreadful moment when you finally realize that perhaps all is lost. Each tragedy has one such moment, one such turning point when the psyche finally grasps that _this is it_, there's no coming back from this all.

For Kaname, it had been the sound of the wood splintering, before the massive front doors of their house gave in and burst open as the council's men rushed in.

The enemy didn't have things easy however, for Haruka was anything from weak. Army or not, it took a madman –or a mad vampire, more exactly—to go against a pureblood at the summit of his power, especially one furious and hell-bent on protecting his family. Kaname too was decided to fight, despite how young he was, but his father forbid him, insisting that he had to be the one to protect his son, as well as Juri and Yuuki.

But nothing is perfect in war, and the soldiers realized quickly that the entry hall blocked by Haruka was a bottleneck where they would be wiped out. Already, a large part of the army had diverted to other areas of the house, breaking in through countless windows and doors, spreading through the manor like a disease, a cancer taking over what was once a pure and pristine house where the Kurans had lived the happiest moments of their lives.

Kaname saw dread in his father's eyes for the first time in his life when they both realized that the southern wing had been breached.

But if Haruka left that spot, through which the largest part of the enemy army was still trying to break in, they would be completely overrun, their escape paths cut as well. He had no choice but keep them at bay, unable to go check on his wife and daughter, and he growled in furious frustration, his aura tearing through a new wave of the enemies forcing the entry.

It was Kaname's turn to come into action, and the young pureblood broke off running as fast as he could in the direction Juri had taken Yuuki to. Corridors, rooms, stairways flew by as he rushed for the hidden room in the second floor, where he knew the two would be. They couldn't use the secret underground area or they'd be trapped without escape if the enemy finally took the house, so Juri must have taken Yuuki to this room instead.

As Kaname approached, the scent of blood was so overpowering that it brought tears to his eyes – his mother's blood, spilled in such quantities…

To his horror, the door was broken, the room ravaged. He stepped inside quickly, and nearly screamed. The blood he'd smelled all the way there was everywhere. On the ground, walls, ceiling, staining the furniture, splattered over Yuuki's spare little bed, dripping off her toys, staining everything, soaking deeply into the soft pattern of the padded walls, slipping between the cracks of the floorboards.

Emptiness was everywhere, no sight of Yuuki… only a gaping hole on the wall through which the wind blew snow into the room, whipping Kaname's face with new gusts of cold, as if mocking him and his inability of protecting his loved ones.

The only thing stopping him from sinking into utter despair was the fact that the scent of his sister's blood was nowhere to be smelled, which meant that she was unharmed, as of now. _If_ _he could find her in time._

He was already decided to jump into the night through the hole in the wall, but the noise he heard next finished convincing him completely: Yuuki's little voice, screaming with utter terror.

Kaname practically threw himself out of the gaping hole in the wall, landing on the snow outside with a powerful grace unexpected in one so young. Snow crunched under his feet as he ran faster than he'd ever ran in his life, panic clutching his heart at the idea of not arriving on time.

But he did arrive, and the sight that greeted him chilled him to the bone. On the adjacent hill, Yuuki was running, screaming at the top of her little lungs in sheer terror as a horde of enemy vampires ran after her, catching up fast, practically already surrounding her.

_Level E's… _So the council could still fall even lower than Kaname had originally imagined they could.

Sending an army after them was bad enough, but releasing hordes of level E's into the wilderness to cut their exit was unbelievable. Strategically speaking, the ensuing chaos was a master move to both keep them in and slow down the hunter army so that Ichiou could get what he wanted before the hunters got there, but the consequences of such acts for the innocent population were unforgivable! There were villages and farms not far, which would inevitably be swarmed by such large numbers.

Not that Kaname had any time to worry about the collaterals at the present moment. In a movement too fast for the enemy to even see him moving, he was dropping among them, standing between the hungry group and the little girl, precise and lethal as his fist crushed through the skull of the first one.

He suppressed a flinch when the bone gave way under his hand, brain matter coating his fingers in a sticky manner and splattering out of the level E's exit wound, blood spraying Kaname himself as well as the shrieking little girl.

He'd never killed anything in his life. He was eight years old, and rather sheltered even for a pureblood.

Vampire development made that at that age he was already physically mature –to the point of being able to reproduce even, if he so wished—but his body's maturity didn't make him mentally prepared in any way for the bloody mess that was to follow.

The scent of the fallen level E's blood only drove the others more crazed, and soon they were in a frenetic madness, throwing themselves at the two children.

With speed born of sheer panic for the safety of the little girl behind him, Kaname downed one after the other, using only one arm because he didn't dare let go of Yuuki – he held onto her little winter coat with all he had, afraid she'd be swept away or run with fear and be out of his sight and among the enemy if he let go even for a second. Meanwhile, she hung from his leg, clinging to his coat and screaming in absolute terror as blood sprayed everywhere and the guttural cries of the hungry horde closing in on them horrified her.

Yuuki was now human, due to the spell that Juri had placed on her to seal into a deep slumber all of her vampire genes. She was deprived of her pureblood aura or senses, but however much a human's hearing may be less sensitive than a vampire's, it didn't change a thing when it came to a situation where there was nothing that could be done to escape the enemies' hungry wailing invading her mind and frightening her into complete panic.

Ironically, Kaname was now glad that the enemy had unleashed level E's on them. Pureblood or not, he wasn't sure if he'd have been able to down them all if they had been a well organized and rational group of warriors. The fact that they were mindless ex-humans driven by insane hunger made them much more predictable, and it also prevented them from using teamwork to take him down.

His muscles screamed at him from all the repeated movements, his mind growing more and more dizzy from using his power to such a level to constantly shove back and tear away the brunt of the group so they wouldn't close in on them while he fought the ones at hand. He was still too young to crush them by waves as Haruka could have done, but he was already using a level of power unbelievable for his age, strength born out of the sheer fear he felt for Yuuki's safety.

At long last, even mindless beasts understood their mistake in facing a pureblood, child or not, and the ones who were farther back but still could see the action started to finally panic and retreat, scattering into the snowy forest and the nearby hills, no doubt deciding that delicious-looking or not, this prey was too well-protected. They rushed away, intent on preying on the nearby villages where easier prey may be found.

When the last enemy was on the run, Kaname collapsed to his knees, exhausted, chest heaving as he tried to suck in more air, choking on his own breath, lungs burning from the exertion. It felt like molten lava had been poured into his chest, and he coughed as he choked, his arms shaking violently from all the swinging and crushing, the muscles burning from having been used too much in too little time.

Around them, the bodies of countless level E's were dissolving into dust, the heaps of it so high that they concealed the snow completely. It would have been a feat even for an adult, but for a child of his age, it was unthinkable. Kaname had long lost count of how many enemies he'd downed, but their numbers were astonishing. He was covered in blood, soaked from head to feet, the sticky level E filth coating his arms, his clothes, splattered all over his face, all over Yuuki, all over the snow all around them.

Yuuki was crying softly, clinging to his back like he was the only thing left in the world, and Kaname fought his aching muscles to shift back and pull her into his arms, bloodstained or not. She was almost as bloody as him anyway, and the comfort was more important for the little girl at the moment than worrying about whether he was going to get her dirtier. Now that the horror was over, the pent up emotion was breaking loose, and she sobbed softly against his chest while he hugged her tightly, gentle arms wrapping around her warm little body while he kissed her head, doing all he could to remember that she didn't have his memories and he had to be careful not to scare her further.

He jolted when he heard a female voice coming from the woods, calling out in fright "Kaname-sama!!"

A young girl about his age emerged suddenly from the woods, with a flushed face from running through the snow and smudges of blood on her nicked cheek and all over her slender arms. Strands of her short hair clung to her face, damp with perspiration, and her cargo pants and fitting Chinese top were splattered with the dark blood of the level E enemies as well.

_Seiren._

She'd apparently been fighting the other end of the horde, desperately trying to get to the spot where she could feel the pureblood's aura. She was probably able to finally break through and approach after Kaname's impressive feat had scared the enemy into fleeing.

"Kaname-sama, are you hurt?!"

Kaname straightened himself, tugging Yuuki close to reassure her, glad to see the bodyguard alive and mostly unharmed –or to be more exact, future bodyguard, as Seiren was the daughter of Haruka's personal bodyguard, and destined to protect Kaname when they grew up.

He assured her that he was fine, and pulled little Yuuki into a better hold before getting up with her in his arms. Yuuki clung to his neck as he hugged her to his chest, and she broke down further into uncontrollable sobbing, not knowing that he was her beloved brother, but trusting him already with all her heart because he was her savior.

Shortly after, a human appeared in the clearing, arriving from the same direction than Seiren. A man with long blond hair, in a dark coat, a bloody sword in his hand.

The instant the man had appeared, at first Kaname had tensed, recognizing the presence of a hunter, but as soon as the blond stepped closer and out of the shadows of the tall pine trees, Kaname immediately recognized him by the exuberant scarf wrapped around his neck, before he even saw his face. The boy's tense look melted into a smile of complete relief and trust as he ran towards the man, carrying little Yuuki in his arms.

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Back in present time, Kaname tossed about in bed, his body slick with sweat, his sleep shallow and bringing him no real rest as he relived in his dream –or better saying, nightmare—the moment when he had to let go of little Yuuki.

.

She clung to him with the despair of a condemned person about to be dragged away to the gallows, but he gently pried her fingers off his blood soaked sleeves, whispering reassuring words and trying to explain to her that she must trust Cross and go with him.

That might have been the hardest thing he'd ever done in his life. Not only handing her over –at that point, he still had illusions that maybe they'd be okay and be reunited after the fight was over—but also managing to reassure her and find the right words to calm her down, when in truth he was just as shaken and close to breaking into tears as she was. He wasn't that much older than her after all, a mere two years.

Cross wanted to send Yuuki to safety under Seiren's care and go back into the manor with Kaname, to look for Juri and to ensure that Haruka and her would be safe --if such a thing was possible, especially with the plans that Kaname knew they had and Cross suspected as well from the fact that little Yuuki was no longer a vampire.

Kaname didn't have the courage to tell Cross about Juri. Not only because he knew what the man felt for her, but also because Kaname himself was much too close to breaking down at the moment, and he feared he would anytime now, if he had to open his mouth to explain about his mother's death. He knew that she couldn't have survived whatever exactly it was that she did to turn Yuuki. He knew enough about the spell she'd used to know that there was no returning for the person placing one of those.

So instead, he did the only thing he could, and convinced the man that it was imperative for him to take Yuuki away before the level E's returned or the hunter armies arrived. Kaname insisted he had to go back first before he could follow them, and Cross finally relented, after promising he would do all he could to find him later, once Yuuki was safe.

They left then, with the little girl crying softly in the man's careful arms. Kaname forbid Seiren from returning to the manor with him, and instead ordered her to serve Cross and protect Yuuki with her life, for as long as she could. The girl looked torn for a second, searching his face for any signs of uncertainty, and finally resigning herself to obey when she found none. She had tears in her eyes as she saluted him and turned around to run into the night after Cross and Yuuki.

Kaname wanted to watch them retreating and wait until Yuuki was completely out of sight, but he didn't have the luxury to do so, with the little time that was left. He intended to return to the house and convince his father to escape, perhaps have the two of them go into hiding or something.

He was adamantly against his father's idea of sacrificing himself so that he could be human and escape the hunters' grasp.

But as it often is in life, one's best hopes and most determined decisions stand no chance against the ruthless whims of fate.

Kaname somehow managed to make it through the woods unfound by the hordes or the enemy army, and slid back into the manor through a window in a wing of the house that hadn't been overrun yet. He ran in the direction where he could feel his father's aura coming from, and as he neared the door leading to the main hall, he felt the ground shake almost on same time than a loud rumble resounded through the house.

The front part of the manor had collapsed into itself, Haruka's power sealing the main entry that had been bristling with enemies so much that he could no longer hold them back.

In a moment, the older pureblood had crossed the distance between them and was beside his son, startling Kaname with how fast he'd moved.

The boy was still breathless from all the running, but quickly told his father about how Yuuki was now safely in Cross' hands, and how they had to run away quickly through the unguarded side, before the hunters arrived or the council army recuperated from the distraction Haruka had created, and finished surrounding the house. Kaname was already turning around, urging his father to follow him quickly, when Haruka held him in place.

Kaname froze with foreboding, but the words his father said then still puzzled the boy completely, at first.

_"Forgive me, my son…"_

And then, before understanding had the time to dawn on Kaname, a wave of energy rushed through him from the spot where his father had put a hand on his shoulder, and the boy's whole body went completely limp as if any strength he might have had had faded away in one second. He fell into Haruka's arms, conscious but unable to move and utterly horrified that he hadn't foreseen that.

Haruka knew Kaname would refuse to let his father die to turn him, and the older pureblood had no intentions of endangering his offspring by wasting one more second in trying to convince him.

All he still had to do before going to join Juri in afterlife was to ensure that Kaname became human. The hunter armies where almost upon them, but once the spell was done, they would view Kaname as just a human child rescued from the vampires swarming the areas of the house that Haruka had blocked off.

Kaname would be safe, and one way or another Cross would find him and take him under his protection. Haruka knew he could trust the man. He knew Cross' devotion for Juri –and in turn for her children—was the same as his. The two men shared a tacit understanding of each other, stemming from the fact that they shared the exact same feelings for the woman they both loved.  
In a way, that ironically made Haruka sometimes feel closer to the hunter than he did to his own brother, who also loved Juri, but in such a different and twisted manner.

Pushing open the door of his study with his foot, Haruka carried Kaname over to a fauteuil and gently propped him sitting down on it. The boy struggled to break out of the momentary paralysis, but it was to no avail as his father's power was too strong for him, and Haruka initiated the spell that would bind down the young pureblood's vampire genes and disguise him as a human child without memories, in the eyes of everyone, even the boy himself.

But once more, fate's cruel fangs had a way to pierce into the flesh of the best laid out plans.

Haruka had already initiated the ritual and could no longer interrupt it, when their very worst nightmare of all burst through the door. _Rido._

Not only Rido, but Rido with Ichiou in tow. Their army might have been just a decoy, or perhaps it was still meant to capture Yuuki and/or Kaname, but once it failed they decided to come inside themselves.

Unable to move, Kaname watched powerless as Haruka tried to fight Rido and failed, the already initiated spell taking away all of his strength and preventing him from fighting with his full power.

The horrible images that followed had seared themselves into Kaname's memory for ever and ever, never to be forgotten. One way or another, Rido had known about the ritual. Maybe not how to actually perform it, as it was ages old and kept secret, but he'd definitely known what it was that Haruka was doing.

Ichiou and him had come there _knowing_, due to Rido's spying, that this was what the Kurans had planned to do for their children.

With the sadistic glee of a man who is enjoying seeing a world he didn't care for fall down in flames, Rido crushed his brother and held him down, hunter sword piercing through his chest, while the ritual Haruka had initiated came to completion, inexorable as the wheels of fate turning, and impossible to stop once it had been started.

Haruka's life and blood poured freely out of his body, not onto the body of his child that he had wanted to save, but onto that of their enemy, Ichiou, while Rido laughed with a vengeful glee at seeing his brother defeated on all fronts.

Tears running down his face, Kaname finally managed to break free from the paralysis, the sheer horror of it all snapping him out of it. But it was much too late.

Even so, the young pureblood was determined to avenge his father at least. Rido tossed Haruka's body at him, and it crumbled into a shimmering dust right as it fell in Kaname's arms.

The young pureblood bellowed in fury, and lashed out at his uncle, intending well to fight all out and take him down.

But the best intentions cannot overcome all obstacles, and inevitably Kaname lost and was captured, despite the damage he managed to cause Rido.

_It was the beginning of the end…_

Tossing restlessly on the bed, Kaname whimpered softly, his body instinctively curling up into a ball in an attempt to protect himself, as his dream delved into the moments after the fight with Rido, and he relived the horror that followed that fateful night.

He never saw Yuuki again after that night, but he knew she was safe. If Cross had been caught by the enemy, Ichiou would have been delighted to torture Kaname with that info, or perhaps even bring the little girl there. So at least Kaname had the solace of knowing her safe, and it was what kept him alive through the worst moments.

The young pureblood was prisoner of Ichiou for some time after the war. The conditions of his imprisonment were so horrible that he'd actually lost track of time completely, and never did find out exactly how long it lasted, but it felt like ages had passed.

By the time Ichiou had enough of his usual daily games and dragged Kaname to the brothel for a brand new type of game, the pureblood was an empty shadow of himself.

There was another rather difficult period as they _'trained' _him to serve the customers, and then his life at the 'house' properly started.

Compared to the times at Ichiou's place, he assumed that it could only be less bad. Not having Ichiou around would be enough of a considerable relief to have Kaname almost think that he could be almost okay with that life. …Or at least, he thought so until they put him on the open-to-the-public list and he met the most extreme customers.

And until he found out that, far from having forgotten him, Ichiou was taking extreme delight in the young pureblood's life of servitude, and planned to come back regularly to remind him that no matter where Kaname was or what he did, he'd never be free of him. The 'house' was a mere extension of Ichiou's playroom, a place where he could still come for Kaname any time he so wished, or merely amuse himself from afar with the pureblood's daily suffering.

Kaname was trembling with rage and horror by now, tears rolling down his face at the memories that played in his mind as he slept.

However much of a façade of submission and control he may put up, it only fooled the others. No matter how much he tried to fool himself, he always came back to the same conclusion: he was as broken as ever, with no chance of ever escaping this nightmare or being whole again.

But for some mysterious reason that he couldn't fathom, the face of the silver haired customer appeared in his dream then, piercing through his despair. He couldn't possibly understand why that hunter's smile soothed him and blocked away some of the fear that was eating at him, but he inevitably relaxed slightly on the bed, his sleep becoming less agitated now that the images of Ichiou and the torture faded away, chased by Zero's presence.

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_Several hours before… _

_New tears were welling up in Kaname's eyes, and he tried so hard to hold at least those back in. He shivered uncontrollably, sobs that he couldn't conceal racking his body as the cool air chilled his wet skin further. The pureblood jolted when he felt a soft warmth wrap around him --the hunter had placed a plush towel over his shoulders, and was gently drying his back and arms. Against his best efforts, against all that his reason told him, Kaname broke down once more, leaning into the hunter's arms, sobbing unabashedly with his face buried against the man's chest, letting go of all the broken pieces of control he'd desperately tried to hold onto and failed. _

_He didn't know how long he'd cried, nor when his exhausted body finally passed out in the other's protective arms, unable to think anymore, or even care where he was or what would happen to him._

.

He woke up in bed, his naked body pleasantly dry and warmly wrapped in the sheets and the bed coverlet, head comfortably propped by pillows, his aching muscles numbed by sleep, to the point that the pain was just a dull thing present in the background, rather than the lancinating agony it had been the previous day. It would be a whole different story once he was more awake or if he moved, since he hadn't had any blood yet and was healing extremely slowly, but all in all, much to his surprise he was feeling already a lot better, or at least as better as he could feel before having blood. …So much that that he suddenly realized he must have slept for _hours_, to be feeling that way.

A surge of panic ran through his body before he turned his head and found the hunter laying next to him with his head propped up on a hand, apparently having been watching him sleep. Kaname's face colored slightly, embarrassed that he hadn't noticed the other's presence sooner. But then, on top of the drugs blocking his abilities, he was so messed up from the recent beating that it was already impressive that he could tell where he was at all.

Zero smiled reassuringly, a soft, protective concern in his eyes when he asked "you okay…?"

Kaname nearly broke down again, at the sheer warmth that seeped from the hunter's gaze, traveling straight to his aching, wounded heart that was desperately in need for that kindness, especially now.

One instinctive glance at the ornate wooden clock on the wall told Kaname that the night was almost over. Zero had stayed next to him through the night, watching over him, comforting him when he tossed in his feverish sleep.

The hunter had done more than merely watch him sleep. He'd cradled Kaname closer, and reassured him when he saw his sleep turn more agitated. He'd held him, caressing his hair all along, whispering gentle words into his ear, until the pureblood's sleep slipped back into a more peaceful rest. Zero had stayed there for him, keeping him warm and safe all along, both from the nightmares within him and from the inevitable outside threats that would have arisen if the hunter had left shortly after the bath.

Kaname would still need to get blood to heal his wounds, and get more rest before he was able to '_work'_ again, but the hunter had given him the chance to rest much more than he could ever hope if he was just on his own: the 'house' would want him functional right away, the handlers wouldn't give him a moment of respite even while he was supposed to be healing, and they usually just all grew impatient and ended up putting him in the teahouse to service customers with _other parts of his body_ while the more wounded areas were healing.

And shortly after Ichiou's visits, when Kaname was still all shaken and vulnerable, that was even worse than usual, and ended up with him failing to provide satisfactory service, and just getting punished worse.  
So to actually get the luxury of not only escaping that but actually being able to sleep and rest properly was completely unexpected.

The pureblood didn't know what to think. He felt something akin to butterflies in his stomach, and the feeling of his heart swelling in surprise in his chest was only rivaled by the size of the lump in his throat.

Tears were something he tried his very best to not show any of his tormentors. They inevitably spilled out in the most brutal moments, but he still tried to control himself as well as he could, especially the rest of the time… and yet, with this hunter, he didn't know what to expect, and the man's puzzling gentleness kept taking him by surprise over and over, threatening to make him spill embarrassing tears so regularly that Kaname burned with renewed shame. But this was a bittersweet feeling, so different from the type of shame he felt when Ichiou or even the other customers touched him.

Zero's presence was soothing, in a way that the pureblood couldn't possibly comprehend. Not only did he not understand why the hunter did those things for him, but he couldn't even understand his own feelings anymore.

Fighting the lump in his throat and the tears making his eyes wet again, Kaname blurted out "Why…?"

The hunter chuckled softly, those amethyst eyes so warm that for a second Kaname had the mad wish that he could lose himself in them forever.

Zero ran a hand along the pureblood's bare arm in a soft caress, locking eyes with the pureblood and admiring the shimmering beauty of his gaze. The chocolate-brown tinge in Kaname's eyes was almost completely gone by now, the garnet-like color in them much more visible in the dark, wet and glistening beautifully from behind dark lashes heavy with tears.

"I thought we'd covered that already last time… _'Why not'_, remember?"

"But… I have nothing to offer you… I _am_ nothing. You have no reason whatsoever to be nice to me." _And I'm so deadly afraid that sooner or later, you'll grow tired of this game and go back to being like they all are._

Against his best hopes of keeping his cool and not opening up to anyone, Kaname was getting inevitably tangled in the other's gentle gaze, more and more unable to pull back up what little was left of his mental barriers. He felt so torn open already, so exposed bare for all to see… what little he had left, his heart, was all that he still tried to protect.

He'd grown used to the horrifying idea that he had no chances of salvaging his body, but he still had hopes that his heart at least wouldn't be completely shattered.  
Ichiou had already torn him to pieces so often that there were days Kaname didn't even know if he still _had_ a heart, but this was different.

Ichiou was a whole other problem, one he couldn't do anything to protect himself against. But Zero was just a new customer of the 'house'.

If he started falling apart to the point that he'd open up like that to any random customer, then he was lost for sure, not only in his body but also in his heart. What little he still had left would be shattered with no return.

Still too weakened to regain his composure just yet, the pureblood couldn't stop himself from letting out a soft whimper at the thought, curling up into himself further on the bed.

But Zero wasn't just any random customer of the house. And Kaname understood that a little bit more when the hunter pulled him closer again, in response to his whimper. Kaname didn't know whether Zero still thought him half awake or not, but the soothing contact was unbelievable. He'd needed it so badly… The hunter had held him during the night, but he was asleep. Now that he was awake and far more conscious than he'd been the previous evening, he could fully enjoy that contact, however much his reason told him he shouldn't wish for it. A ragged sob escaped the pureblood's lips as he burrowed against the other, burying his face into the hunter's chest while Zero held him close and whispered soothing words into his ear, lips brushing the edge of the pureblood's ear lobe, sending shivers along his whole body, not of fear but of delight this time.

_No… No, don't!! You'll lose yourself completely!!_

But then again, wasn't he already completely lost? Wasn't he already so utterly broken and hopeless, abandoned by all and at the mercy of constant cruelty that knew no bounds?

The edge of his abused conscience told him he was clinging to illusions, and that he'd already lost everything, so his heart was dubiously worth worrying about by now, but the pureblood still couldn't help but desperately fear the moment when the hunter would inevitably drop the mask or change his mind, and crush everything Kaname still had left.

If he came to rely on that gentleness, and then lost it, he feared what last little bastion was still standing in his heart would shatter to pieces.

But for now, before it happened… _maybe he could just stop thinking?_

There was nothing he could possibly do to stop the hunter from destroying him if he decided to do it. So perhaps, worrying about it before it happened was pointless, inevitable as it may be?

The pureblood couldn't simply _not_ worry about the issue or not be conscious of how deeply vulnerable he was, but maybe… just maybe he could forget to think altogether right now.

Whatever the future may hold, for the time being, for the few hours or minutes left, maybe he could just shut off and abandon himself in those gentle arms, letting go of any rational thinking and just soaking in this warmth that he so desperately needed.

Let him be crushed later if the hunter decided to do so. Horribly dangerous as the plan was, Kaname didn't really have any other options.

The pureblood whimpered softly, snuggling closer, and the hunter's warmth enveloped him, soothing lips brushing against his ear and whispering sweet nothings, gentle fingers running through his hair, caressing him softly while the hunter's words lulled the pureblood into a semi-asleep-semi-awake state.

Despite the need to rest more and his own semi-conscious decision to just forget about thinking altogether for the moment, Kaname was deeply, instinctually afraid of what would happen once the hunter decided to leave… or even what might happen while he was asleep. He couldn't help but trust him for the time being, but he still maintained a partially watchful state, heavy-lidded eyes glazing over slightly as he slipped in and out of sleep, relaxing in the hunter's arms.

Meanwhile, Zero was terribly puzzled at himself.

He'd been acting on instinct for a while now, because the pureblood was just so tragically broken that the deepest instincts in Zero reacted to it, compelling him to pick up the pieces and try to do something, but now that the vampire was, well, as safe as he could get considering the situation, the hunter was wondering what in the world had possessed him to make him feel such an urge to protect this bloo… this person.

A day before, he'd have said _'this bloodsucker, this vampire, this beast, this slave'_ …any of the such. But suddenly, Kaname was a completely different thing in Zero's eyes.

The hunter inevitably thought back to something he'd often wondered. _If they look so human, who's to say they don't feel pain and shame the way humans do?_

Before, it had been a philosophical musing. He'd pondered on the question, absentmindedly, like he may idly ponder whether it was really decent for the cow in the field to become the steak in his plate… before shrugging it off and eating said steak.

Now, the rhetorical question had become a serious concern.

He knew that such ideas would amount to nothing in the society at large –his master had driven home the point that having such ideas was really dangerous, in fact—but Zero couldn't help thinking that regardless of what may happen to vampires in general… he felt an immense urge to hold in his arms _this_ vampire in particular, and make things less bad for him.

It was foolish, perhaps. _Most certainly._

Soothe a vampire's suffering? Counterproductive to say the least, for a hunter, no?

But then, vampires were there to service them, according to the current society. Most people choose to just do it viewing them as enemies, but there was nothing wrong with Zero spending his time in whatever way he pleased, right?  
So who would know that when the pureblood and him where alone in that room, they were spending time in a peaceful manner rather than a brutal one? So what if Zero had this sudden urge? Who would ever find out and be able to point a finger to accuse him?  
Who would ever believe a slave even if Kaname did tell anyone?

The hunter could do absolutely anything he wanted to the pureblood in his arms, and get away with it all the same. So he might as well just follow his instincts and see if he managed to eventually figure out why he felt so attracted by him and compelled to be gentle to him.

He was young, he had a good position in the Hunter Association, fairly good revenues… there was no reason for him not to take a favorite. After all, many hunters had slaves of choice in the 'houses', vampires who still serviced other customers all the same, but which those hunters came to visit more often than they visited another… there was no reason why Zero couldn't do the same, regardless that he was young and had only recently started coming to the blood district.

Naturally, in the others' case it wasn't done out of a gentle emotion, but rather because they enjoyed their favorite's body or in many cases took a particular pleasure in tormenting them rather than another, but all in all, in the eyes of everybody else nothing would change since no one would know that Zero visited the pureblood with a different idea.

The young hunter eyed the clock, mentally calculating when he'd have to leave to make it to the Hunter Association on time for work. This was going to be a hard day… He hadn't slept _at all_ through the night.  
He may be naturally kind and feel bad for the wounded pureblood, but he was still a hunter, and nowhere near out of his mind enough to close his eyes in the presence of a vampire, regardless that said vampire had no chance to possibly harm him. It just went against every possible instinct. So he'd stayed awake all along.

_Damn… Ichiru was going to kill him for this later._

He'd left a message in their answering machine earlier, telling his brother that he'd be home really late, but he ended up not going home at all. He'd phone him later to make sure that Ichiru wasn't worried, although considering that it was by night and he was in his off-duty hours, Ichiru already knew he wasn't in mission or anything, so he wouldn't be very worried. Not that Ichiru usually seemed worried, even the times that Zero did get home later than him..._ Sometimes, it was almost as if he didn't care, but that was impossible, of course. Right?_

Zero couldn't help but shift in bed slightly, unconsciously wanting to chase away the instinctive train of thoughts that occasionally returned to disturb him.

The small movement made the pureblood open his eyes a bit more, still half dazed and clinging to the hunter. Zero ran a hand through Kaname's hair again, and picked the moment to tell him he had to leave.

A brief flash of fear showed in the pureblood's eyes before it was carefully concealed away. In a way, Zero made him utterly open and terribly in danger of being more vulnerable as a result, but paradoxically, he also had strengthened him by providing him with the rest and support he'd needed to make a more smooth transition between his post-Ichiou mental state --completely torn apart --, and the more guarded state he usually had when he faced everybody else.

Normally, it took him a lot more time to make the transition all the way, because the handlers and other customers would go on brutalizing him shortly after the older man left, resulting in Kaname's still raw mind being thrown from a horror to another, unable to get the necessary respite to rebuild his barriers. In Zero's warm embrace however, he could rest and even –unexpectedly—relax enough to start to find himself again, a little more at least.

It meant more than he could put in words, much to his surprise.

Of all things, he never expected that the hunter would not only be so kind to him, but even provide him with a 'safe place' where he'd actually felt momentarily well enough to pull back together the shattered pieces of himself, at least as well as he could anyway, considering how broken he inevitably had been for the past ten years.

Rebuilt barriers or not, the pureblood couldn't help the deeply wistful sadness in his gaze when the bed shifted with the hunter's weight leaving it.

Kaname bit his lip to not ask the incredibly dangerous and foolish question that was dancing on his tongue. _'Will you come back?'_

The hunter had helped him, for unfathomable reasons, but wishing he would return, much less wish the man would go on being so gentle_… it would be nothing short of stupid. _

He'd only be opening himself up for more hurt later if he let the man know that he wanted to see him again.

To the pureblood's surprise, the hunter turned back to him with a soft smile as he rearranged his clothes, and asked "Is there something you'd like from outside, such as a book or any type of food that you can't get here? I was planning to bring something to pass the time when I come see you again tomorrow."

For a split second, Kaname froze and stared at the hunter's face, not understanding the words that came out of his mouth. Then, he flushed so terribly red that he had to muster all his will to not embarrass himself further by instinctively burying his face in the pillows in a pathetic attempt to hide his flaming red face.

The hunter had seen straight through him and his hope to see him again, and worse, he offered such unthinkable things that Kaname didn't even know how to begin answering that question, and flushed even harder, if such a thing was possible.

Even with the currently dim lighting, there was no way the hunter could have missed the embarrassing blushing, but rather than feeling more concerned by that, at the moment Kaname's mind was too busy being in overload about the offer and what it implied. He tried to fight around the lump in his throat to figure out what would be the proper answer for such an offer. He'd seen_ a lot_ of things in those ten years, but hunters bringing gifts to vampires was certainly not one of them.

Once more, the hunter provided the solution to the pureblood's dilemma, interrupting his frantic search for the right answer. "It's okay if you don't know what to say. I'll bring a box of sweets or something."

Technically, tea, other beverages and many edible things were available in the 'house' if the customers so wished, but Kaname had of course never tried them, as they were for the guests, not for the slaves. With an instinctive nostalgic pang for everything that was so utterly lost, he couldn't help but wonder if the hunter's choice of snacks would be in any way be similar to things he'd eaten in the past.

The pureblood tried to get up to see the hunter to the door, but the mere movement of shifting his hips to try and sit up sent a spike of pain shooting through his body in a wave so brutal that he immediately fell back on the bed. _No, moving wasn't exactly a good idea at the moment._

If he had his healing abilities, he'd be all fine by now, but with the drugs in his blood this pain could go on for days if he didn't have any blood. Of course, it wouldn't be the case, as the 'house' would ensure that he was ready for work quite soon, whether he was fully healed or just barely able to walk. Kaname would much rather have stayed in pain a bit longer instead of having to service the customers, but he didn't have a choice over any such decisions, of course.

The hunter looked back before exiting, and nodded at him, before whispering a soft "Take care…" like he did the previous time.

The pureblood was surprised enough that he nearly didn't react on time, and only nodded back right before the door closed. _That man really had a knack to get him off-balance. _

But against everything that Kaname's reason told him about dangerous hopes and foolish illusions, the pureblood couldn't help but lay back in bed and inhale deeply the comforting scent of the hunter on the sheets surrounding him. It made him feel so unexpectedly safe that his chest felt too tight to hold his heart in it.

Belatedly, he realized he'd forgotten to ask his savior's name.

.

_._

_._

_[tbc]_

_

* * *

__The title for this chapter is still from a song by "HIM". XD *loves their songs for soundtrack of this fic* XD *lol*  
This time, it's the opening line of "Killing Loneliness". :D_

_**NOTE:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,**__ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
__Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname__ from the flashbacks in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), and then imagine how he might turn out if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and __was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery__. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	7. I'm waiting for you

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 7 – "I'm waiting for you."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.__  
__**Warnings: AU. **__Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and lemons from time to time__.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
__Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_  
This week's chapter is a bit shorter than the past 2 or 3 ones, because scanlating chapter 46 of VK ate away all my free time and I couldn't finish tweaking some other scenes I wanted to put in this chapter, so they'll be in the next chapter. XD; (I'm sure no VK fan will mind that. XD *lol*)_

_  
Also, I'm horribly sorry, I promised replying to the fic-reviews last week, and in the end I was so swamped all week that I haven't yet. D: D:  
This week I'll get to it and hopefully catch up on the replies to the reviews of the previous chapters. ^^;_

_I have various chunks of CoB already written ahead of time, and then just edit and post as I go, but because the scenes I currently have already written are mostly passed after this moment in the story, I couldn't use them and save time. I want the relationship between Zero and Kaname to grow a bit more before certain major things I have planned happen in the story. ;D_

_This is still an important chapter though, as it re-introduces quite a few characters that you might have been wondering about…_

_So yeah, this chapter has a bit of different things, hopefully you'll still enjoy it. :)_

* * *

.

.

Snow was falling softly in the little garden at the back of the chapel, snowflakes twirling lazily in the air around the two lonely figures standing side by side in the cold.

It was late enough in the year that the trees were bare, and only a little hazel bush and a lone robin singing made the nature still look somewhat alive in the otherwise mostly white scenery.

A man wearing a colorful scarf stood next to a young girl, both of them apparently lost in prayer each on their own, but visibly united by the way they clung close together, a near tangible bittersweet feeling emanating from the both of them, in the manner of people who've lost too many of their loved ones and now relished every moment of solace they could find in each other.

They faced a small patch of snowy dead grass were they had set down a delicate bundle of flowers, as one would before a grave, except that there was none in sight.

They were odd cases, the two of them. He had a delicate beauty that stood out for a man, and physically looked not much more than 35 at most, but his eyes were filled with a sadness and a deep wistfulness that spoke of the years he'd lived and sometimes made his gaze look even older than the 40~45 that he was in truth.  
His wispy blond hair was tied in a loose ponytail in the back, contrasting with the dark trench coat he wore. He had been an active-duty hunter in the past, but quit in his prime, to pursue ideals of peace that were scorned in the current society. He had an arm over the girl's shoulders, in a protective gesture of support.

The girl was petite and looked as frail as glass, her gaunt figure both innocent and vulnerable, enhanced by the oversized garments she wore because of the cold. She had a big coat over her winter jacket, and wore a plaid skirt with dark wooly stockings beneath. Her hands were entwined together in a gesture of prayer, but her knuckles were nearly white and her arms were shaking from the cold.

He pulled her closer to him, sharing his warmth with her. It was a cold winter, but the weather was not what made them shiver. It just seemed to be so much colder each time the two visited that place.

They'd just had a memorial service, although they hadn't revealed the name of the deceased person they were honoring. The old priest who usually conducted the services for the school's chapel was under the impression that it was in the honor of fallen friends and family killed by vampires during the war, and didn't ask any questions, not wanting to reawaken more painful memories.

If the old man knew they were having a memorial service for a vampire, he might have refused.

Even if he did not, out of kindness of heart or friendship for the misguided souls asking for such a shocking thing, he'd still be utterly surprised, and there was always the danger he might speak of it to others. It was best to leave the matter secret and avoid attracting even more attention.

This was how the man and the girl dealt with such matters whenever it came to 'normal people'. They had long learned that the society they lived in wouldn't see things the way they did, and that when it came for a matter this important, it was best to be as discreet as possible.

The wind played with the girl's long brown hair, making silky strands of it flutter aimlessly around her. At long last, she surrendered to the elements and stuffed her hands into the front pocket of her coat. Her shaking fingers were numb from cold and reached hastily for the little pocket warmer she'd shoved in her coat earlier before leaving home.

The man continued praying a little longer, and the girl's gaze was still lost on the grass while she moved her lips as if to speak, forming the shape of a name and various words, but no sound broke the still silence of the little garden they stood in.

No sound normally ever came out of her lips, in fact. At any time. She'd been mute for as long as she could remember, more or less. Not that she did remember anything beyond what happened during a certain snowy night ten years ago, when she was saved from level E's by a brave boy that she would never see again… and yet, to whom she felt so close that it was as if he was a constant presence next to her.  
In part because of the extraordinary way things had happened, and the unbelievable courage he'd displayed to save her life at the peril of his own, but in part also thanks to the man next to her. It was him who ensured that she grew up knowing so much about the boy who had saved her, to the point where she never felt like he was a part of a past that was over, but rather a close loved one that was still with her, if anything in her heart and thoughts.

In a way perhaps it was more painful that way, because she ended up missing him with her every breath, but she would never have chosen to have it any other way. She was glad she was given the chance to know her savior so well, and not only because he had saved her but because on some level that she couldn't quite explain, she had felt all along that there was a deep connection between them, from the moment she first saw him as he dropped in front of her and stopped the vampire about to devour her.

The trauma of the attack, or the trauma of the loss, she never knew exactly how to explain it, made that she never did manage to speak again after that night. She remembered screaming in fear in the snow, so she mustn't have been mute before the attack, and yet she simply couldn't manage to make the sounds come out of her mouth.  
But she'd grown used to it over the years, perhaps because she didn't have memories of before, and so frustrating as it may often be, she wasn't particularly fazed by having to use sign language, or –when she didn't want to risk saying something that others might see and understand from afar—writing it down.

The man was done praying now, and the two huddled closer. The girl pulled out of her coat a small pocket-notebook and an accordingly tiny little pencil, and scribbled something on the paper.

_[I wish we had an actual tomb we could visit. It feels a bit empty, praying for him just in the garden.]_

It was always '_him'_, and never an actual name. The man, her adoptive father, had long taught the girl to not ever write down any names, just in case. That way, if there was ever a problem or a surprise investigation from the Hunter Association, her notebook wouldn't reveal anything incriminating about her or anyone else.

The man attempted a reassuring smile that came out more sad than warming, and squeezed his daughter's shoulder gently while letting out a pained sigh. "Me too, Yuuki, me too."

No matter how much time passed, it never became any easier. It was only the man's iron will to be strong for the frail form next to him that made him able to not break down crying again as they stood there. Yuuki had cried all along, during the ceremony and earlier, but the peaceful moment together always made her feel a little better. Each year they held that ceremony, and always ended it with those moments standing in the garden, as if they were gathered over his tomb, except that there was no tomb.

_No tomb for vampires in the current world, even if they had had his ashes to bury in the first place._

Each year, they ended the day by praying there, and talking to him in their hearts, feeling a little like he was there with them more closely when they did so. Maybe that was why Yuuki always felt a little better when they did it.

The girl's hands had apparently warmed up enough to write more, or she must feel in a unusually talkative mood, because she went on quickly scribbling on her miniature notebook.

_[Father, do you think S. might feel better if she came with us next time? It's a pity we couldn't bring her…]_

"You know we can't bring her, Yuuki." His voice was pained once again, but for her sake he managed to keep out of it the anger he felt for the current society, the society that made things the way they were. In a softer hushed tone, he added quietly "Seiren is officially supposed to be a slave. We're already pushing things as it is, we can't be openly bringing her anywhere we go without attracting trouble. She's safer at home, and you know how she refuses to even risk going around in the school much, knowing that it could endanger us too."

_[I know… I just wish this world could be different, father…]_

He didn't have to speak for her to see in his sad eyes that he felt the same.

The chapel me may be technically on school grounds, but Cross Academy was constantly under surveillance of the Hunter Association, under the pretense of making sure that its owner's pacifist activism wasn't being openly preached in the school. The current government usually tolerated Cross' opinions and even turned a blind eye over his activism demanding that human rights be extended to the vampires as well, mostly because they didn't see it as threatening since it was a laughable idea in their eyes. But his ideas were still strongly frowned upon, and for the sake of Yuuki's safety, Cross made sure to not do anything going far enough for the government to qualify it as propaganda endangering the public order.  
In the new order of things after the war, freedom of expression was a figure of speech. You had freedom of expression as long as you weren't saying something the government disagreed with. If you did, it was better to watch out, as they would use any excuse they could to incriminate you if you went too far.

Luckily for Cross and Yuuki, people saw the equality of rights as such a ludicrous idea and such a ridiculous utopia that no one truly considered him a menace to the government, which saved them from harsher treatment, and allowed them to lead a normal life, Cross as the chairman of his academy, and Yuuki as his adopted daughter and student of the same school. But each year, they had less students, despite Cross' efforts in keeping his political pro-peace activities separate so that the school would be off limits.

He couldn't blame the parents taking their children out of his school. Ideals or not, if he had to even he would give up his activities rather than risk having them endanger Yuuki. It was the reason why he limited his public appearances and activism, and why he'd been forced to register Seiren as his personal slave rather than just hide her and risk getting caught. He couldn't afford giving the government reasons to move against him, and leave Yuuki alone if he was imprisoned or worse. He'd made the promise to protect her with his life, not only to Juri, but also to Kaname.

He sighed deeply, clenching his fists while his gaze lost itself on the snowy grass again, and he whispered inaudibly "Kaname… I'd avenge your death if only I knew who killed you… But the bastards wouldn't give me anything other than the names that were on the lists of the dead … "

---

At the blood district, evening was approaching and the 'houses' were just about to begin preparing to open soon. The slaves were dragged out of their rooms by handlers and shoved in the direction of the display windows, complying and walking hastily, even if it never seemed prompt or fast enough for the handlers, who always found an excuse to hit the slower ones regardless of whether they had a reason for it or not.

Once in their assigned spots, the vampires were made to remain in whatever position may provide a more lewd display to interest the potential customers, and had their wrists, ankles and knees shackled to the chairs.

A young vampire with impressive blue eyes and short blond hair tousled in boyish locks was shooting hurried glances around himself, in as discreet of a manner as he could manage, while the handlers fastened him to the seat. He hadn't failed to notice that the Louis XV armchair at the farther end of the display window was empty once again, and that filled him with dread.

Aidou was the young vampire's name, although no one used names for the slaves, as they were refused the right to have one, forbidden of talking to the hunters unless ordered, and naturally also forbidden of talking to each other, under severe danger of being suspected of rebellion and heavily punished whether the suspicion was serious or not.

Next to the blond, his cousin, a taller vampire with fiery red hair was being equally secured to his chair, while another handler had already done the same to a female vampire with cascading long hair. They were amongst the most beautiful of the _merchandise_, and thus arranged in order to be more visible. The only one who was even more appealing to the customers than them was naturally the one given the most visible chair, the pureblood, who was still missing at the moment.

As soon as the handlers moved farther down the display, shackling to each chair the many other vampires the 'house' owned, Aidou tried to get his cousin's attention. It wasn't an easy task when you were in full sight, unable to move due to the chains, and couldn't risk making noise without being discovered.

"Akatsuki…! Have you seen at all Kaname-sama today or yesterday?"

It was quickly whispered, but since Aidou couldn't speak too loud without the handlers hearing, his cousin didn't even notice. The redhead had his regular dose of anti-vampire drug shots the previous day and was still dazed from it, his senses even more dulled than usual, so he didn't register the whispers from his worried cousin. Cain was having enough trouble concentrating as it was, and was focusing his attention on staring at the female vampire next to him, trying to discern if she was okay --another not-exactly-allowed activity since it fell loosely under interacting with each other, although merely looking was nowhere as prone to induce punishment as the act of speaking without permission or using names, or much worse, using forbidden expressions of respect towards a pureblood as Aidou had just done.

The slaves were not allowed ranks, so Aidou risked big whenever he did it. But over the years he had grown far too skilled at surviving to possibly slip in a manner that would be audible to the handlers, and he quickly dropped his attempt and looked perfectly innocent when a handler turned around to see if they were doing anything.

Luca –the long haired female vampire—had a dark bruise near her eye, probably from a punch, and Cain was trying to fight the drugged haze clouding his mind to determine whether that was all or whether she was more hurt than she seemed.

Of the four of them, --if you could really count the pureblood as "one of them"—Luca and Kaname were the ones who suffered most. Cain's gentle nature was just as unsuited to their situation as any other's, but he was also a survivor, and he just went on doing exactly that, despite inevitably feeling like the flame of life within him dwindled more and more with each day. He made himself go on, if anything to try and see if Luca was okay. He may not be able to do anything to protect her, but he had self-appointed himself the duty of watching over her from afar, if anything. Sometimes, when their eyes crossed, it felt a little like that lessened the burden, and like they could instill strength in one another in those shared looks, hurriedly exchanged and hidden before a handler caught them.

Cain had long lost hope of being able to help Aidou though, and much as he loved his cousin from the bottom of his heart, more like a brother than just a cousin… even he had trouble looking at the blond, sometimes. It was precisely because they were --or had been, at least-- so close that it was hard to see Aidou now, and to accept what he had chosen to make of himself.

Aidou had became quite the idol, charming everybody he could and becoming a star among the regulars, something rather rare, since normally hunters never allowed such liberties to a vampire. He used his boyish innocent looks and natural charisma to sell himself completely, in a constant attempt to lessen the burden on the pureblood he worshipped from afar. _In hopes that if he took all the customers, Kaname would be safer, would have less…_

It didn't work, of course, if anything he just earned himself the hatred of the other vampire slaves who saw him as someone who'd sold his soul. A whore rather than a rape victim as a number of them still hoped to see themselves even after so many years being made to comply to the worst degradations. Some of them, the ones who still had a little pride left, still focused on the fact that while they did do anything they were made to do, it was all because they were forced to, rather than because they went out of their way to do so by their own choice, as Aidou often did.

But more customers just kept coming and coming each day, and Kaname was the center of attentions – after all that house was a rare place where even a low status hunter could afford a night with a pureblood… who would pass on such an occasion?

So each night, Kaname was fully booked, and Aidou despaired both of not being able to save him from them, and of having become something that utterly horrified and disgusted himself. He knew better than anyone why his cousin was reluctant to look at him. There were days when Aidou felt that the only thing young and innocent left in him were his looks, as he felt himself so utterly soiled inside that he could never hope to regain the dignity he'd long lost, even if the entire world were to change one day, which was in itself an unthinkable thing considering the iron grip the hunters had over the way the current society was organized.

But overall, Aidou had shown more strength than any of them had expected. That at least Cain had to admit to himself. He couldn't help but feel guilty that he couldn't do for Luca what Aidou had tried to do for Kaname, even though in the end it was to no avail.

Luca and Kaname went through the worst. Luca because she was physically more delicate than them, and the pureblood because he was simply the most sought after slave in the entire house. He attracted the largest number of customers of them all, and often ended up with the more sadistic ones as well. Much to Aidou's despair.

Slaves were kept in their rooms under lock during the hours when the house was not open for customers, unless they had to be taken out for 'repairs' if they were badly wounded, or for their regular drug shots or other reasons. So the moment when they were all together in the display was very much one of the only moment when they could visually inspect each other and see how the ones they cared for were faring, even if they were supposedly unable to speak to each other without risking grave punishment.

The blond had been particularly worried lately because he knew that the brute who came for Kaname once a month or so had been at the house recently, and he hadn't seen the pureblood at all since then. Short of open rebellion, Aidou had tried absolutely all he possibly could to find out what was going on, but even after he'd managed to obtain some information under the table, he still didn't know if it was accurate or not, and was too used to the life they currently lead to not inevitably expect the worst. Whenever _that man_ came by, he inevitably departed leaving the pureblood in a state of devastation such that the house was forced to take him off commission for the vast majority of the day afterwards, and they tended to put him back to work in the 'teahouse' area, servicing customers wanting a quick one or merely killing time while waiting for another slave –simply because whenever the man came by, Kaname was unable to function properly for a while afterwards. But that also meant that Aidou would get to see him at one point or another and check on him, even if from afar. If anything he should have seen him when they were taken to the displays the previous day, but the pureblood was nowhere.

The fact that Kaname had disappeared altogether was extremely worrisome. Of course, it was horrible that the house would normally force the pureblood to work when he was in no conditions to do so, so it would be better not to see him since that might mean he was actually resting… except that by now Aidou had no illusions that there was no way in hell that they had suddenly decided for once to let Kaname rest instead. If the pureblood wasn't around, it could only mean that something even worse had happened. Which horrified Aidou, especially since it wouldn't be the first time that it was the case. He shuddered at the memory of some of the worst incidents, most of them caused by the monthly visits or by particularly cruel customers too much into torture.

At least, Luca was around and didn't look particularly worse than usual, so Aidou ruled out already the possibility that the 'house' had rekindled their cruel interest in breeding experiments. At one point, they were hell bent on forcing the pureblood and Luca to breed, and Kaname had openly refused to obey. He'd been beaten within an inch of his life for it, and Aidou was quite sure that the pureblood would have been killed, #1 attraction of the house or not, if not for _that man's_ intervention. The several months that followed that incident had been among the worst of those past several years, because naturally, the old degenerate demanded a price of Kaname for his intervention, and for stopping the breeding project.

Against everything that reason and survival instincts told him, Aidou's deepest wish was for the man to decide to rent _him_ one day, rather than Kaname. Anti-vampire drugs or not, he'd kill the bastard or die trying.

He hated him with a murderous fury that knew no bounds and that grew with every single time he saw the lifeless gleam in the pureblood's tired eyes after each visit. Aidou had already furiously hated the old bastard long before the breeding incident, but seeing the way Kaname became even more broken after whatever it was the man forced him to do made the blond's hatred multiply tenfold, along with his ever growing protectiveness towards Kaname.

Of course, Aidou had no way to know that the reason why Kaname hadn't been at the display the previous day wasn't for some nefarious incident for once, but merely because of Zero's visit, which had lasted an entire night and enabled Kaname to rest a lot more than he could ever dream of otherwise, but which had also considerably delayed the time when the house did finally take the pureblood out to be given blood and be able to heal faster from the wounds Ichiou had inflicted. As such, the pureblood had only been put to work the previous day after the normal evening hours had already begun, and by then Aidou was no longer in the display and didn't get to see him.

The blond was about to panic further and started wondering if maybe the old bastard had decided to take Kaname out of the house after all, when the pureblood appeared, pulled along by a handler who shackled him to his usual spot. Aidou held back any dangerous displays of interest, but as soon as the handler had moved away to go for other slaves, the blond quickly turned to take in the pureblood's appearance and see if he was wounded or anything. Kaname seemed unexpectedly healthy, and surprisingly less shaken than he would normally tend to be a mere two days after one of the man's visits.

Aidou risked a barely audible whisper as soon as the handlers were farther away.

"Kaname-sama! Are you okay?"

The pureblood replied in kind, quickly scanning the surroundings to see if anyone was paying attention to them. "I have told you countless times not to speak to me, much less call me by my former name."

The tone was cold and guarded, but that was nothing new coming from him, and Aidou knew well the reason. Kaname felt responsible whenever the aristocrats –especially Aidou, who went out of his way to take risks-- endangered their safety in unnecessary displays of respect to him. Such a thing was far too dangerous these days, and Aidou could be badly punished for it. So Kaname tried to put as much distance as he could between the aristocrats and himself, keeping an icy façade at all times and strongly discouraging any attempts of them to speak to him. Cain understood and complied well enough, Luca respected his wishes, but Aidou… no matter how coldly Kaname forced himself to act, Aidou was always trying, however much dangerous it might still be.

But regardless of the mask Kaname may normally wear when around them, he couldn't help a certain warmth about himself today.

The grey-haired hunter, whose name he still didn't know, had told him that he'd come back the next day. That was yesterday morning, which meant that with luck, he'd be seeing him again any time soon when the house opened for the night. He berated himself for the foolish hope in his thoughts, reminding himself that the man had merely not taken him the previous day because he was wounded, and if he did return today it most likely simply meant that things would follow the 'natural' course between a hunter customer and a slave of one of the houses.

And yet, the unexpected kindness that hunter had shown him, and the completely unbelievable gentleness with which he'd soothed the pureblood's pains and fears in two occasions already, with his blood and then with his supporting presence and protection right when Kaname most needed it… The pureblood couldn't possibly understand what game the hunter was playing, but not even his deeply ingrained instincts of prudence and distrust could stop him from hoping to see the man again, if anything to know if he was wrong all along or not.

Kaname quickly schooled his features to not display more than the guarded calm he was trying to maintain, but it had been enough for Aidou to see already that something was out of the normal. The blond was extremely perceptive, and used to seeing Kaname looking _worse_ than usual, not the opposite, especially so shortly after one of the monthly visits from _that man_, so he didn't know what to think of the strange feeling, almost like anticipation, emanating from the pureblood at the moment.

The nightfall hadn't come yet, but the house would open soon. The glare of the last sunlight of the day may be soft in a human's opinion, but hitting full-front the vampires on the display, it was highly uncomfortable, even downright painful for those of powerful blood. For a pureblood, direct sunlight in the eyes was much worse than for any other rank, but Kaname ignored the discomfort for once, too focused on looking at the people passing outside in the street, trying to spot the person he was waiting for.

However much he may inwardly tell himself he was being stupid, he couldn't help but feel almost giddy at heart wondering when he would come and what he would bring… The hunter had promised to bring some kind of sweets, and had even suggested a book or something, before Kaname had hesitated on how to reply.

Nevermind that the 'house' would forbid the mere idea of such a thing, of course, and confiscate anything left behind, declaring they had to be forgotten belongings of a customer, rather than believing such an unthinkable gift. It was impossible for Kaname to receive gifts, but if it was food, and it was eaten before the hunter left again, no one would know…

Kaname had so few things he could possibly look forward to in his current life, that even the idea of some unknown snack seemed strangely fascinating and prone to make his mind wander about what wonderful flavors it could have.

He felt embarrassed for the childish joy the idea brought him, but he'd spent so many years eating nothing but the repulsive rations that the slaves were given, that anything more palatable would seem like food coming straight down from the heavens.

It wasn't just because it was any snack either. It was something brought by someone who'd been so unexpectedly nice to him. It was strangely soothing, like a tiny light amidst the horrible darkness he was constantly trapped in.

But before he got to spend much longer wondering on what the hunter would bring, the house opened and a handler came to fetch him.

Except that when he was taken to the check in, much to Kaname's disappointment and worry it was an unknown customer that had called for him, and the grey haired hunter he had been waiting for was nowhere to be seen...

.

.

.

_[tbc]_

* * *

_**A quick little note because people sometimes ask:** **The correct spelling for their names is "Cain" and "Luca". XD *lol***  
I am aware that they spell it differently in the US release, which might be why people ask this from time to time, but I am using the correct, official spelling that Hino-sensei gave the magazine, and that has been used for all VK merchandise for the manga as well as for the anime stuff. :D  
In the official fanbook, Hino-sensei has confirmed again that those are the correct spellings she came up with as she created those two characters._

_I don't follow the official spellings for Kaname's surname though, because his family name is spelled "Clan", and I just happen to prefer "Kuran". :D  
Similarly, I like the look of "Aidou" more than "Idou". XD;  
So technically, I'm not spelling Kuran or Aidou right, and yet everybody wonders about "Cain" and "Luca" which are accurate. XD *lol*_

_I think it's not too too important which way you prefer to spell it in fics, if with the official spelling (**"Clan", "Idou", "Cain" and "Luca"**) or with the transcription (which would give you **"Kuran", "Aidou", "Kain" and "Ruka"**), or if you prefer a mix of your favorite versions from each side, but in case you want to know exactly which is which, I wrote a list of each version, taken from the Japanese official info.  
You can find it on my profile here on FFnet, among the ressources other writers might find interesting. :D_

_

* * *

  
With luck, next chapter will be ready this wednesday, but considering all the holidays stuff going on, it might only come saturday or sunday, sorry. ^^;_

_And yes, even this little short title is a chunk of lyrics from HIM. *LOL*  
I'm seeing if I can manage to make all the chapter title chunks of my favorite HIM songs, for this fic. XD *lol*  
This one is from "It's all tears", which is my favorite song for this fic. It's kind of like it's soundtrack for when I write. XD; *lol*_

_And finally, I get to introduce a bit more Cross & Yuuki~! If you remember, in the manga, she was mute for a week after the attack, until Kaname came to visit. He was still thinking that she was afraid of him and tried to leave to not scare her... At that moment, Yuuki was so intent on stopping him from leaving that she managed to speak, as she got up and latched for his coat. :D  
In CoB, she never did see Kaname again after the night when he saved her, because he was captured then. So she never regained the use of her voice.  
The chairman raised her telling her all sorts of things about Kaname, so she feels close to him and feels that she knows him, but because she didn't grow up physically next to him, she missed various things she had in the manga. Which resulted in her being more insecure and frail, as well as her never having had the urge to cut her hair short etc. (she's less tomboy and self-assured than in the manga also.) She also has no qualms about calling the chairman "father", and he is her only family, so they're very close.  
She also never met Zero (yet, at least), so she didn't get to develop that more self-assured and protective side of hers to stand up for him when he was broken after Shizuka's attack (and Zero himself didn't get attacked by Shizuka in CoB either, so he didn't get the same trauma)._

_So all in all, it's still the same Yuuki, but slightly different due to how the different life influenced her. And we will see how the events of the fic make her evolve further, and whether that will make her closer to the way she is in the manga or farther. ;D_

_Although Zero and Kaname are definitely going to be paired up together, so uhm, don't expect much non-yaoi activity. XD;;; *lol*_


	8. You've been sent by hope

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 8 - "You've been sent by hope."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname**__. Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**  
Warnings: AU.**__ Sex slavery, prostitution, mature themes and lemons from time to time.  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_  
Err, the holidays really kicked my fic etc. schedule all out of order, sorry. ^^;  
I meant to post this chapter last Sunday, but so much stuff happened and it only got ready now. On the good side, it's a longer one, so hopefully it makes up for that a bit. :D *hopes you'll enjoy it*_

_This chapter has both hurt and comfort, but the ones of you who favor the comfort over the hurt might want to skip a part of the rape scene, maybe… It's not too graphic, but there's injury, and so, if that bothers you, skip some paragraphs? ^^;_

_Once more, I fail at catching up with review replies. ^^; *replied to new ones to chapters 1&2 but is still working on the others*_

* * *

.

.

Zero glanced at his watch, mumbling a curse about the loads of paperwork that a recent hunting mission had caused, and which had delayed him leaving work.

Not that he was a slacker in any way –in fact, he usually took on much more work than most of his coworkers—but he'd have preferred to be able to leave on time today, since he intended to go to the 'house' and hoped to arrive just as it opened… which would no longer be possible now since he'd left work a good hour late.

He dropped by a fancy pastry shop on the way, thinking that if he was going to bring something, he might as well make it special.  
A part of him, too used to the way things were in the current society and to the way he'd been raised –or more exactly, to the things he'd been taught about vampires as he grew up—made him still feel a little stupid about taking such gentle attentions for a vampire, but that part of him was no longer at the forefront. Not after what he'd seen two days ago. The way Kaname had been so broken, and his suffering so visible and real as he crumbled into despair in his arms… There was no way that Zero could possibly bring himself to behave with him the way he was taught that it was _'proper'_ to behave towards vampires.

'_Bloodsuckers, beasts, slaves made so by their defeat and by their very nature. Born for this, intended that way by nature and fate.' _… This may be what the other hunters all believed of the vampires, (be it out of truly believing it or merely because it was convenient and saved them the trouble to think of how moral their acts were or weren't), but Zero could no longer find acceptable the idea of behaving that way towards the pureblood, not after what he'd witnessed.

The hunter population's deeply ingrained beliefs that vampires were nothing but beasts was a leitmotiv constantly repeated in their every rule and law, from the most basic millennia-old law that said that _'killing a vampire is not a crime'_ all the way to the more elaborate and more recent ones overseeing the details of the post-war slavery… but more and more Zero wondered if maybe, the reason why the hunters were so hell-bent on ensuring that everybody believed that vampires deserved it all was so that no one would question what would otherwise seem like such a horrible injustice.

Truth to be said, Zero still wasn't quite set in stone about what vampire did or did not truly deserve –after all, a lifetime of beliefs didn't easily change based on a single occurrence witnessed--, but he was definitely shaken, and couldn't help the protective urges swelling more and more inside his chest.  
In some strange way, he felt a little responsible for the pureblood, after having seen him so broken and then seen him pulling himself back together a slight bit while he was in his arms.

Zero had the urge to stick around and find out more about that vampire, and by extension about the race in general, in hopes of building his own opinion based on what he could find out for himself, rather than on whatever pre-digested opinions his peers might want to pass onto him. If it turned out that the vampires were indeed nothing more than lowly beasts and bloodsuckers deserving of the slavery they were condemned to, as everybody said, then so be it, but Zero wanted to investigate for himself.

And in the process, he could also fulfill his rather puzzling urges of soothing the pureblood's pain –after all, that couldn't harm his little research in any way, so there was no reason not to indulge in the urges...

That's what he repeated to himself in order to quiet the conservative voice in his mind whenever it expressed shock over something related to Zero's attentions towards the pureblood –for example, the fact that the hunter had chosen a quite expensive pasty shop and picked assorted flavors of cream puffs to bring for the vampire, in a luxurious box with each pastry individually packaged in surprisingly cute little compartments, inside a beautiful wrapping.

Not something completely out of price, but still, not the type of thing he'd imagined getting when he thought of bringing a snack, initially. He ended up settling for that as he ran his eyes through the display, because he couldn't help but wonder what type of regal things a pureblood might have eaten before the war, and inevitably thought that if he was going to go through the trouble of bringing him something, he might as well bring something good. Belatedly, he thought he should have insisted to know what Kaname would have liked. _Oh well, maybe next time._

Zero was surprised to realize he was already thinking of a 'next time', after only having seen the pureblood twice. But then, he did decide to start visiting the 'house' regularly precisely to see him after all, and it would be the best way to get to know the pureblood himself and even the species better… it might even help him become a better hunter by giving him a better knowledge of the enemies… _Yeah right. Who was he fooling?_

As Zero remembered the broken form shaking in his arms throughout the night he spent holding the pureblood, he knew well that he wasn't doing this just to find out about the vampires or what not. He really did care for that one vampire in particular.

But again, he repeated just to convince himself, _there was nothing wrong with it_ _– after seeing the vampire in the state he was in the other day, not being concerned would be strange. He was just doing what anyone would do if they saw a wounded cat or a dog on the side of the road. It was nothing more than that._

At this point, he tried to give no ears to the insidious voice whispering that it was by far not quite the same type of situation.

--

At the 'house' business hours had already started, long before Zero made it there.

A gruff hunter in his thirties had been running a distracted gaze on the display window, scratching his beard while he made his choice. He was in the mood for some mild violence, but didn't want a slave too weak, just to avoid having to pay repair fees if he caused more damage than the normal prices already covered. It was unlikely it would go very high since he wasn't planning to go for all-out torture tonight, and the prices did cover quite a nice amount of damage, but he hadn't gotten his paycheck from the Association yet that month, so he wanted to limit the damage just in case.

He spotted a regal looking specimen on the most fancy chair of the display, and the apparent calm of the vampire irked him, making him want to wipe the composed expression off his face, preferably with a good punch. His hunter senses told him that dulled as the vampire's powers may be, which often made it a bit harder to tell, he was quite certainly a pureblood.

_Good, they heal faster._

A pureblood was normally much more expensive to rent, but the man had been to this 'house' before and seen the pricelist, vaguely remembering that for whatever reason they had a pureblood for the base price of any normal slave. He hoped it was still the case and pushed open the entry door, stepping in and kicking the snow off the soles of his boots before strolling leisurely towards the check-in counter.

Minutes later, the usual check-in form was quickly filled and the man was in the room with the subdued pureblood.

Even less time later, he was over the vampire, pinning him roughly onto the bed and tearing off what little the pureblood was wearing, which was bondage gear rather than normal clothing.

--

By the time Zero arrived at the 'house', the sun was starting to set, and he cursed under his breath as he took a look at the display and saw that Kaname was already taken. He filled the check-in paper making a reservation to go in after the customer currently renting the pureblood, and settled down to wait in the teahouse, insisting that he didn't need anyone to occupy him while he waited.

The house owner had been at the check-in desk, and recognized Zero from the previous time he'd come over, either due to his insistence last time or because not that many customers stayed entire nights like the young hunter had done the previous time.

Zero wasn't too happy about the owner friendly addressing him about that as if they were close, but he jumped to the occasion when the man offered to let him go in right away as soon as the customer was done, remembering that Zero had requested that the previous time. The man offered it simply because it meant the slave would be rented again right away instead of having to waste time –and thus money—waiting for a handler to check on him, then for him to get clean and ready again. Zero on the other hand, remembered the brutal way the handler had treated Kaname the previous time, and preferred to avoid that… although one could wonder if he'd still have accepted if he'd known that the owner was offering it assuming he had some strange fetish making him want to have the slave while he'd been just used by another, which was the opinion the man had formed because of the previous time…

As Zero filled up the form, the owner kept eyeing the bag he'd brought, and informed him of the additional advance fees for using toys or bondage gear not-provided by the 'house'. Zero stared at the man for an instant before realization dawned on him and he understood that the man was thinking that he had something strange in that shopping bag rather than food.

The hunter wasn't too sure about whether bringing food was even allowed or not –he was pretty sure no one would bring any for the slaves, in any case—and perhaps it was better to let him think whatever, so Zero just nodded and let him go on explaining. The man went on about how the house could provide such things any time a customer so wanted, although it was also fine for the customers to bring their own choice of sex toys if they so preferred, and that _'injuries caused by the use of tools or toys were completely allowed, but only covered in the normal price up to a certain amount, the rest being at the charge of the customer if the repair costs were higher than the amount covered.'_

Zero had to stifle a shudder of disgust at the idea, and at the way they always used terms such as _'repair costs'_ as if they were talking about an object rather than a wounded living being… but then, that was how almost everybody viewed vampires these days...

As a child, even before becoming Yagari's pupil, Zero was firmly taught by his parents and other elders that vampires didn't have souls, and that killing one wasn't a crime whether the vampire was guilty of something or not –their simple existence in itself was viewed as a crime and a sin by almost all hunters.

After he'd seen the utter horror and despair in the pureblood's eyes the previous time, he had started wondering if the soul thing too was just propaganda that the Association might have fed generations and generations of hunters to make the task easier.  
But whether it was true or not, just having in mind the idea hunters had of the value of a vampire's life, it was really not all that surprising that once the vampires lost the war, the tables ended up turned in such a dramatic manner.

He was particularly bothered by the part of what the 'house' owner told him that implied that customers could very much inflict whatever pain and damage they wished upon the slaves, without having to worry about anything. He knew it was the case, pretty much everybody knew that hunters could do anything they wanted to slaves and get away with it, but hearing it said out loud with such matter-of-factness sent a chill through his body.

For the 'house', it was merely a financial matter: if the slave was too damaged to work, the customer had to pay for the expenses of getting them enough blood and a little time off to recover enough. Not even to fully recover, as no one bothered to wait until wounds were completely healed, the slaves just had to recover enough to be put back to work.

Zero may know about slaves in general, but he still wasn't quite familiar yet with the way the 'houses' worked, and he was shocked by each new little thing he found out, perhaps even more now than he would have been before, since now each new discovery made him understand so much better how miserable the pureblood's life must be.

------------

After the disappointment from having waited for the silver-haired hunter to come and being rented by a different customer instead –Kaname was still telling himself that he might simply come later, but his pessimistic side was quite sure that he wouldn't come at all—the pureblood was now faced with the more immediate danger of the customer who _did_ come.

Kaname had a long night ahead of himself, and getting hurt early after the house opened would do him no good, especially since they had just sent him for repairs the day before, and would be more than displeased if they had to do it again so soon, resulting in additional beatings on top of whatever the customer did to him.

The pureblood tried to avoid getting in more trouble, and was extra-pliant and obedient, complying even faster than usual to whatever the client wanted, almost before he voiced it, but it seemed that the man was not mollified by this, nor was he one for rewarding initiative.

After two heavy slaps that left his head ringing, the pureblood decided that it was better to stop trying and just lay back and endure. With a large number of the customers, there simple was no way to avoid a beating, regardless of how hard you tried or how well you behaved.

Of course, that didn't mean that being quiet and enduring would make things _less_ bad.

.

He'd nearly blanked out for a second, and found that his hips felt horribly _wrong_, like they were at an odd angle or something. The man rammed back into him, and Kaname couldn't hold back a yelp of pain. The searing pain he'd already been feeling before was now multiplied by the rough movement jerking his legs further. They had been forced open on the bed for far too long, and the man's most recent snapping motion to push them spread even farther apart and down flat onto the bed had gone beyond what nature had intended for it to go, snapping the joints out of place.

Less than an instant after the pureblood screamed, a heavy hand landed on his face with jarring strength, slamming the dark haired head back bouncing against the mattress. It was just a warning, but there was no doubt that much worse pain would follow, so Kaname took the clue and gritted his teeth to stay as silent as he could, fingers clenched tightly against the mattress, knuckles white from strain.

A pureblood's bones were extremely hard to break, but that didn't mean his joints wouldn't pop out of socket like those of a human or any vampire rank. It was just harder for it to happen, but they would still dislocate, if pushed far enough… and then they would heal back fine later, but that would be after a more or less long wrenching agony while the customer went on, screwing the pureblood near senseless while Kaname felt like he was about to snap broken in two, feeling even more physically close to tearing open as he already usually felt when any of the customers plunged into him. After all, no one ever deemed that lube or preparation were necessary things for slaves either –in their eyes, vampires didn't deserve any of it, and anything done to reduce their pain was just wasteful. The cases where lube was used where usually only if it was needed for the effective use of toys, or if it was for the comfort of the man taking the vampire, never the opposite.

Currently, the man was pinning the pureblood down, hands gripping his slender shoulders tightly, bruising the pale skin as the hunter pushed down for balance and thrust in and out of the quivering body beneath him. Kaname's eyes were squeezed shut and so was his mouth, lips drawn into a tense line, teeth clenched tightly to hold in the sounds of pain that kept threatening to slip out of his lips.

The pureblood had to cling onto something, _anything_, to escape this horror. For the longest time, he would just let his mind wander and flutter away towards the little haven of memories he kept hidden and safe in the deepest confines of his mind, where he hoped no one could tear it from him. It was like a tiny secret garden, a hidden place where he stored his memories of his family, and where he imagined little Yuuki smiling at him innocently like she used to. Her gentle eyes and that innocent smile could wipe away almost any type of pain from him, and give him the strength to continue enduring.

The problem was that with every breath he took, with each rape, with each day, each month, each year spent in that life, his little box-garden was being eaten away more and more, and each time it felt like the space it occupied was smaller, like brushes receding, trees disappearing, and the small patch of green his memories of Yuuki stood on becoming more and more small, the withering grey of everything surrounding it growing wider as each moment passed.

More and more, he felt too tainted to go to that safe place, too afraid that if he kept pulling his strength out of that precious treasure, there would be nothing left of either, the delicate memories spent and soiled, tainted by his very presence. And so he turned his back to the little garden and lost himself in the empty darkness that threatened to devour him body and soul.

He wondered, if he had nothing left to cling onto, would he finally completely fall apart? He was so very close to losing everything he still had and still was…

_How much can I take...? How much _more_ can I take?_

_Every single time, it's like I'm losing a bigger part of myself._

_How long until there's nothing left?!_

The pureblood's fingers tightened and slackened nervously on the bed sheets, his mind desperately searching for anything to hang onto and escape the moment at hand, when finally, something strangely soothing crossed his mind.

The memory of the grey haired hunter who was so unexpectedly gentle to him and told him to 'take care'.

Against all odds, the thought reassured the pureblood, and made him feel somewhat stronger when he focused on it.

The man plowing into him incessantly set a hand down on the bed for better balance before thrusting into him at a different angle -- even more roughly than before, maybe because the man's movements got more brutal as he neared his climax.  
The pureblood bit the inside of his cheeks to not cry out. Kaname's hearing registered a sound that definitely didn't seem natural for his hips to make, and a spike of pain shot through him in like a blinding white light before he blanked out. He didn't fully lose conscience –by now, he was far too used to being hurt and hardly ever passed out so easily, but the moments of semi-conscience at least saved him the discomfort of the last few instants of the act, and when he came back to himself, the man above him was already pulling out and cleaning up.

The man still had a hand on one of the pureblood's knees, and was wiping sweat of his brow with the back of his other hand. He stayed in place breathing heavily for a little, before making a noise in between a groan and a grunt and shoving the pureblood aside, the hand the man still had on Kaname's knee flipping the pureblood over to the side suddenly, shoving together shut the legs that had been spread open wide for so long, in a brutal movement.

Normally, this wouldn't be necessarily something painful, but because of the already existing injury, Kaname yelped in pain and surprise as his freshly dislocated joints were snapped brutally into a new direction, equally wrong and out of place. The man was already getting up, however, and paid him no heed as the pureblood curled up on his side on the bed, desperately holding in the tears of pain that threatened to spill, mind reeling and dizzy from how unexpectedly sudden and painful the movement had been.

The man didn't bother looking back and just got dressed and left, not wanting to linger around and pay for more time than the bare necessary.

This meant that soon a handler would drop by to check for injuries and ensure that all was in order in the room, and then immediately after the handler reported back, a new customer would be sent in. Dislocated joints were not an open injury nor did they make it impossible for the slaves to work, so Kaname wasn't quite sure whether they'd allow him to take a break or not. He'd have similar issues in the past, and knew that it depended on each case and on the level of cruelty of the handler filling the report.

Most likely he'd be made to go on working tonight, considering how he'd had to be out of commission due to Ichiou so recently. The house was not keen on having to send them for 'repairs' often, even when they needed it.

The pureblood knew he had to force himself to get up, to try to snap his bones back into the right place on his own and then quickly go to the bathroom and clean up to be ready for the next one, but… he simply couldn't get up, couldn't force himself to crawl for the edge of the bed. He could just curl up further, instinctively sliding a hand between his legs to check for further injuries, whimpering softly at the utter despair that his situation never ceased to sink further into. Fluids oozing out slid between his fingers as he pressed them to himself nervously, feeling the aching tender skin throb painfully beneath his trembling hand.

Through the haze of pain and misery, he was still surprised by how just thinking of the grey-haired hunter had lent him so much strength earlier. Even now, as the horror threatened to swallow him once more, the memory of his face looking at him with reassuring eyes prevented the pureblood from sinking and losing himself in the horror even further.  
That puzzled Kaname considerably, because until this occurrence, only the memories of Yuuki and their lost past had such an effect on him.

It was strangely unsettling, because the man he was thinking of was a hunter, the same as all his tormentors, and there was absolutely no reason to believe that he'd be different, nor that for some mysterious reason he'd go on being nice to the pureblood any longer. Most likely, the kindness displayed previously was just yet another twisted game. Hadn't he not come tonight, after all?

And yet, Kaname couldn't help but hope that the man's kindness was real and that he would stay the same --horrified as he may feel by the weakness he displayed in hoping for something that he knew well was so impossible.

The pain in his hips and other places of his body was still violently racking through the pureblood, and whatever his reason may tell him, he couldn't help his lips from forming the words softly, whispering almost inaudibly "please… where are you? You said you'd come today… please…"

The pureblood jolted when a sudden little click indicated the door being unlocked and open as someone entered.

_And he hadn't even cleaned up yet._

He'd get a beating for sure, but he couldn't even get up, so it was pointless to admonish himself for not having tried anyway. _This was just going to be another of those unavoidable beatings._

To Kaname's utter surprise then, the voice that followed wasn't a handler's harsh one but a soft voice rushed with worry and filled with concern.

The voice of the person he was hoping to see.

Zero closed the door behind himself and quickly approached the bed, looking worried, and Kaname went pale with surprise before a flush of shame put some color on his cheeks, embarrassed at how much relief he felt when he heard the man's voice. _This couldn't go on this way. He was far to open to this man._

But he also terribly needed the comfort the other seemed to want to provide, at the moment. And so he failed once more to listen to what logic dictated him, and embraced the very momentary and tenuous feeling of safety brought by the fact that it was this person who was here with him and not a cruel handler or another brutal customer.

The hunter was asking him if he was okay, worriedly staring at the odd angle Kaname's legs were at, and the pureblood broke out of the daze induced by pain and worry to crank his head to the side and try to smile at him through the veil of renewed tears that threatened to roll out of his eyes.

"I'm much better… now that you're here."

A shameful –and dangerous-- confession that sent a spike of self-disgust the very moment it unwittingly escaped the pureblood's lips, but it was nevertheless the truth.

The hunter set down on a nearby divan the bag he'd been carrying, and pulled off his jacket, tossing it over it as well. Quickly, he had rolled up his sleeves and was beside the pureblood again, carefully pulling him closer to the side of the bed and rolling him onto his back gently while supporting his legs. Kaname suppressed a whimper, but was surprised to feel it was considerably less painful to be handled by this man than when the previous customer had slammed his legs to the side.

A little involuntary hiss of pain escaped the pureblood's lips when the hunter begun to handle one of his legs to test the joint, but Zero was careful, and soon reassuring words accompanied his touch. "I'm not too bad at first aid, actually. It can always turn out necessary on the field, so we all get training… I could try setting it back in place if you want me to."

_If you trust me with it._

Unspoken words that need not be said, as they were clear in the man's gaze. Just as it was clear in the pureblood's eyes that he'd much rather it be this man to do that than any of the handlers.

The pureblood mumbled a _'please'_, fingers knotting in the sheets and body trembling slightly in apprehension for the pain he expected to take place any time soon. But to his surprise, the hunter was even more careful about it now, and gently set the pureblood's knee over his shoulder, holding the leg firmly in place with that hand while pinning Kaname's hips to the mattress with his other arm. A quick movement happened suddenly, accompanied by a dull noise, and the bone was properly back in its socket. A white hot pain flashed over Kaname the moment the hunter had pulled back and snapped the joint back in place, but it lasted a mere fraction of a second, not even leaving the pureblood the time to cry out from the pain. Not used to anyone ever caring about how he felt, Kaname was amazed when the man was kind enough to even ask him if he was okay before moving to the other leg and repeating the same procedure.

Back in their sockets, the pureblood's legs felt heavy and sore, but they felt somewhat right and responsive again, and he could even sit up to face the hunter without as much pain as he'd expected. Even slowed down, his healing was still vastly faster than a human's, so the soreness would fade away over time as it mended.

He stood with a certain difficulty, but quickly regained his balance. The hunter made to steady the pureblood with a hand on his arm, and he accepted the help, busy trying to ignore the repulsive sticky feeling of something sliding down his inner thighs now that he was standing.

"Would… would you mind if I bathed first?"

Zero didn't mind, of course, and instead indicated that he'd happily join the pureblood.

Kaname pulled the soiled sheets off the bed and flung them into the little door in the wall before unsteadily wobbling towards the bathroom with the hunter tagging along.

The pureblood showered quickly while the hunter stepped back into the room for something or another. Zero gave him some minutes alone, and by the time he returned to the bathroom carrying the shopping bag he'd brought, Kaname was cleanly washed and had started pouring them a bath and dissolving scented salts in it.

The bath went strangely similar to their first, in that there was a strange mix of intimacy and bittersweet awkwardness in the air. The first time they had bathed together, they had just shared an unexpected intimate moment, mitigated by the pureblood's worry that the hunter's kindness was but a mask that would drop right away, as he expected Zero to take him in the bathtub.

Now, the intimacy was still present –due to the different times Zero had helped Kaname—but that same fear from the first meeting was also still there for the vampire. If anything, it was almost bigger now, because the more he saw Zero, the more he hoped that the man's gentleness was genuine… and yet he also knew that it couldn't possibly be the case. A hunter being so kind to a vampire for no reason, in the current world… It just couldn't be true.

And the more the pureblood's reason reminded him of that, the more Kaname hoped that the instant at hand at least would last as long as possible, and that the inevitable betrayal would come another time, another day, as late as possible, so that he may enjoy this moment at least, and worry about the inevitable later. It was a dangerous hope, but considering the pureblood's situation, he didn't have any way to protect himself anyway, and a fool's hope was all he could possibly rely on.

The hunter shed his clothing, and Kaname looked away, hands clenching on his lap as he sat in the half full bathtub, not looking as the hunter stepped in. Kaname expected the worse any second now, and was surprised when Zero simply sat in the water and asked somewhat embarrassedly "Can we have the flowers this time too…?"

The pureblood almost openly stared at the hunter's face for a second, before he understood that the man meant the scented rose petals for bath. _So, the worse wouldn't be coming just yet… presumably…?  
_Kaname let go the breath that he'd been holding, a tiny ray of momentary hope forming in his chest as he bent over the side of the bathtub to reach for the white ceramic container with the petals, in the nearby cabinet. As soon as he turned around to reach for it though, he realized that the position he was in gave quite the view of his exposed backside and thighs, and was practically an invitation to take him over the edge of the tub.

_So that was why the hunter asked for that._

The pureblood's heart hammered against his ribs as he picked up the container, expecting the man's hands on his skin anytime now. The feared touch that should have been inevitable didn't come, but Kaname stayed in the same position anyway, bent forward over the edge, waiting, thinking he was expected to be still, and not daring to turn back and look at the hunter.  
He thought he understood where the man wanted him, and he didn't have the heart to turn and see the lust he knew would be in the eyes of the person who had given him such unexpected moments of peace.

Zero finally did finally reach up –whether to reassure the pureblood or to actually touch him in the way he feared, Kaname would never find out-- and the sound of his arm breaking the surface of the water startled the pureblood, making the container with the rose petals, that he was still holding against his chest, slip from his wet fingers and fall with a heavy splash into the water, the loose lid opening and the contents spilling out, flooding the bath with countless petals.

Kaname gasped with a flustered look, fingers clasped tightly around the –now very empty and wet-- container, and the hunter just stared at the petals that were quickly spreading and covering completely the surface of the water.

"I'm so sorry, Kaname. Is this going to be a problem?"

Unexpected words, to which the pureblood didn't know exactly how to reply. He was used to a world so different from that which this hunter kept bringing into his life, that he wasn't quite sure what the man meant. _If it would be a problem in…taking him? Or if it would be a problem with the bath or with the price to pay the house?!_

He opted for the most straightforward answer, much as he feared it may not be what the hunter was asking.

"It won't be a problem for the bath… I'll just be in trouble for wasting them."

"I'll tell them I ordered you to pour it all into the bath. Or that I did it myself. I can always pay for a new pot of petals. You won't be in trouble."

Kaname could only stammer a weak _'what?'_, surprised once more. No customer would bother doing that for him, normally. But Zero was yet to surprise him further, as he reached out of the tub and into the bag he'd left next to it earlier, pulling out the box of pastries he's brought.

"I promised you a snack, remember? I hope you like those. If not, I suppose you can always tell me what you'd like instead, and I'll bring it next time or something."

The hunter brushed it off as if it was nothing, lightly handling the box to the pureblood, but Kaname could well see that it was something of high quality and carefully picked. He may not have had much contact with the world in the past ten years, but he could easily guess that a box like that didn't come from a random cheap bakery. He was so mesmerized by the gift that he didn't expect anymore by now, that he barely dared to touch it with his wet fingers.

Zero leaned his back against the edge of the bathtub, and watched as Kaname sat down opposite to him and pried the box open with unsteady fingers, pulling off the silky ribbon and then unwrapping the delicate paper with the logos of the pastry shop, before opening the top. The pureblood's heart was beating a wild tattoo in his chest for completely different reasons now, and he felt moisture burn his eyes, to his surprise. _He was not tearing up because of this, was he?!_

But it was just so utterly unexpected and light years away from anything anyone had done for him in so many years, that he couldn't help the emotion fogging up his sight. The inner wrapping was gently pulled aside by shaking fingers, and the delicate box revealed several little square spaces, each containing a plump cream puff. Zero had picked assorted flavors, not knowing what the pureblood would have liked. Chocolate, pistachio, peach, strawberry, vanilla, coffee, blueberry, and various others sat side by side offering a tempting display, golden from the oven but pulling towards pastel colors each of a slightly different hue to indicate the filling.

The hunter was watching the pureblood closely to see his reaction, and almost feared he might hate cream puffs or something when Kaname made a desolate face. But the pureblood's shaking voice removed that doubt from his mind.

Kaname's eyes were cast down when he spoke, handing the box back.

"It's… it's too good for me. I couldn't possibly repay you anyway… I… I have nothing."

_Nothing that isn't already yours by default the moment you pay to spend time with me anyway._

"You don't _have_ to repay me. For anything."

The pureblood swallowed the words he was about to say, when he saw the adamant determination in the hunter's eyes. Zero reached forward, closing his hand over the pureblood's to hold it on the box and indicate that he wouldn't be accepting it back anyway.

"Anything I do for you, I do because I feel like it. You don't have to do anything or try to repay me in any way. If you try to give it back to me, I'll simply throw it away."

Instinctively, the pureblood's fingers tightened around the box, as if the little treasure he was marveling at had been momentarily in danger of being thrown away like trash. He inevitably flushed deeply when the hunter smiled at his little instinctive movement, finding it strangely endearing and unexpected in a vampire. But then, they were both full of surprises for each other.

Kaname finally decided that the likelihood of the hunter brutalizing him any time soon was rather low at the moment, and sagged into a more relaxed position with relief, still flushed from embarrassment but clinging closely to his precious box.

Ten years of abuse and slavery had made social interaction somewhat rusty for the pureblood, so only after a little while did he snap back to what was proper and hand the box with an embarrassed smile, offering the hunter the first pick. Zero smiled back reassuringly, and pulled out a green tea cream puff. He was never much of a person for sweets, usually preferring the 'manlier' flavors of ramen and other such salty dishes, but for some reason he'd automatically assumed the pureblood would like sweet flavors. He was now slightly kicking himself inwardly, worrying that it might not be the case. He was reassured though, when he saw Kaname's nimble fingers reach into the box and pull out a strawberry cream puff with a look of marveled awe, before he bit the tip of it and his eyes nearly rolled back in delight. For a little bit, the pureblood was so enthralled by the flavor that he nearly forgot himself, then quickly tried to regain some composure, choking in the process and coughing lightly while he blushed a deeper shade of red. Zero laughed and helped hold the box safely above the water level while the pureblood coughed, covering his mouth with his other hand that still held the rest of the cream puff he wasn't done eating.

The border of the bathtub was thick enough to even sit on, and Zero set the box down on it before picking up a second cream puff and sinking back into the pleasantly warm water. They were really good, he was glad he picked those flavors and that shop. He'd really wanted to give the vampire a little something special… and embarrassed as Kaname may be at being seen while so marveled by pastries, it was quite obvious that he was thoroughly enjoying them.

Zero couldn't help but ask. "What do you normally eat?"

The pureblood hesitated for a second, stopping in mid air as he was moving to get a second cream-puff –the first one had been duly devoured by now—but Zero gestured for him to go on, and the pureblood choose a vanilla-flavored one before leaning back against the tub and replying.

"The slaves all eat some kind of mix… The handlers just call it 'slave rations'… I'm not sure what they're made of, but I heard it was some kind of protein mix. It's brownish-beige and tastes… not very palatable."

_Not very palatable_ was by far an overly polite way of saying it was absolutely repulsive to the point of gagging. Which he had done, several times, before he got used to it. Years eating it would make anything acceptable.

The rations were a sort of mashed mix not very different in flavor from a pureed version of what livestock was fed, as the slave traders and owners all around couldn't care less for the fact that vampires had an even more delicate palate than humans, and that the food they were given made the general morale even lower. If anything, that was a bonus at the eyes of the handlers and others.

The pureblood pushed from his mind the disgusting images of the 'food' –if it could be called that-- which he was forced to eat each day to survive, and focused instead of nibbling on the tip of the lovely pastry in his hand, reveling in every tiny bit of its delicious flavor.

The rations would probably taste even worse after having finally tasted something this delicious, but for the time being, the pureblood was in a small paradise of delight with his little pastry.

.

_How are your hips? Do they still hurt much? _

_How fast can you heal?_

_How long do they make you work each night? How many customers tend to come per night?_

_How old are you?_

Or worse, the _other_ thing he wondered with horror.

_How old were you when you were captured and first enslaved?_

So many questions that Zero wanted to ask, some out of worried curiosity, others out of just plain mortified horror, but he couldn't bring himself to, realizing always an instant before he spoke that asking such a thing would probably break the precious moment of calm they were sharing. It may be just because of the pastries, but for a rare moment the pureblood actually seemed less miserable and less haunted. Zero realized that the other always seemed to be on his guard and expecting to be hit --or worse-- at all times, so he felt strongly the urge to protect that rare peaceful moment.

He tilted the box towards the pureblood, inviting him to take another once he finished the second cream puff, and Kaname eagerly complied, a renewed shade of pink coloring his cheeks in an attractive manner, embarrassed at how obvious his joy because of the pastries was.

Zero was slightly shocked to find how endearing the vampire could be. There were so many old tales about vampires… _'don't look into their eyes, or you'll be sucked in and become their thrall'_... and so many more. But those were tales told by hunters, the same ones who said things such as _'killing a vampire is no sin' _and_ 'nature made the bloodsuckers beautiful, nocturnal and quick to heal because they were meant for sexual slavery, their bodies perfected for it by fate and nature themselves.'_

The more the young hunter pondered on the question, the more he came to the conclusion that much as the majority of his learnings were very useful in the field of battle and all, when it came to the philosophy behind things, he was glad he'd decided to make up his own mind based on the product of his own discoveries. He was feeling more and more that the old beliefs and sayings about the enemy race should be taken with a pretty big grain of salt, and examined carefully before he decided to trust any of them or not.

When Zero was a child, he'd initially rejected the terribly violent anti-vampire doctrine that all hunter families fed their children since early. He'd silently believed that it was impossible for an entire species to be the horribly depraved beasts they were made to be.

At some point during the war though, the nurse in Zero's school turned out to be a refugee from the early battles of the war, an ex-human who lost control of her bloodlust and attacked them when Zero had brought Ichiru to the infirmary. The boys' master, Yagari, had fought her, but Zero had begged him not to harm her, and had gone as far as intervening and trying to protect the woman, whom he knew to be a kind hearted person normally.

By Zero's fault, his master had lost an eye, and the boy had been so shocked by the mindless violence of the level E woman, lashing out and struggling with a bestial craze, rolling on the ground in a tight fight with Yagari until the very last instant when the man finally managed to crush her throat with his bare hands and fell back sitting, panting heavily and bleeding from his gouged out eye and the various wounds he'd incurred during the fight.

That day, Zero had been faced with the horror that vampires could represent, and had finally understood how dangerous they could be. He was torn between what he started to think were just childish beliefs, and the apparent truth that Yagari had shown him, in his teachings and in the very example before his eyes.

And Zero was also a very responsible boy. He had always been, since an early age, perhaps because he'd all along carried already the endless guilt he felt for what he'd done to his twin before they were even born. Zero had never forgiven himself for Ichiru, and after the incident with his master, he'd started carrying a new layer of guilt, regardless of the fact that Yagari would constantly insist that he'd saved him by his own choice and that he didn't want Zero to feel guilty.

Zero may have been a child then, but he was far from stupid, and quite ahead for his age. He overheard a number of discussions among the adults. Discussions that he couldn't possibly ignore.

Discussions about how Yagari was one of the most promising young hunters of his generation, and how now that he'd been maimed, his career would probably be doomed, as an one-eyed hunter would always perform less well than one with full vision and perfect depth perception --Yagari had used a sword until then, in the manner of the legendary hunter he'd most admired in his youth, but after the incident he abandoned it for the sake of firearms, which he could wield with less difficulty despite the handicap.

Those were discussions that made Zero's guilt set itself in stone, and that led him to accept whatever his master said, as if he felt that it was the very least he could do to compensate him.

At such an early age, the boy was already determined enough to feel that perhaps, his life was the only thing he could offer to repay the man. But since Yagari insisted that the boy had no fault in it, Zero could only settle for giving himself to his teachings completely, embracing anything that Yagari taught him as the absolute truth, and casting aside the idealistic foolishness and utopic ideas of his tender years.

But now, so many years had passed, and so many things had changed. Regardless of his handicap, Yagari had shown all the skeptics what he was made of, and had gone to become the best hunter of his time, one-eyed or not.

And Zero, much as he still felt completely responsible for his master's injury, slowly started to breathe out of the carcan of guilt that he'd carried along for so long. This newfound freedom came for a great part thanks to Yagari's success, proving that he hadn't destroyed his master's chances as he'd feared all along... and in part because of Yagari's constant presence and reassurances throughout Zero's childhood. The guilt and feeling of responsibility for the injury were still there, but Zero had learned to live with it, and it no longer held him captive to the point of preventing him from having free will or thinking by himself. It had taken years, but Zero had started in recent years to wonder again about subjects he hadn't touched upon in so long. His master accepted discussion in private, insisting that some of those were dangerous subjects to mention in public in the current society, but much as he disagreed with Zero –sometimes rather virulently--, he never actually tried to crush the boy's chances to think for himself, worry for him as he may.

It probably helped that while Yagari was a traditionalist, he was not like the majority of hunters, whose position towards the vampires should be qualified of sadistic more than anything else.

Rather than seeing the fallen enemies as convenient fodder for the brothels, Yagari thought the vampires to be unfortunate beings lost in their instincts and who should be terminated or imprisoned, but who ultimately deserved more to have their suffering abridged with a merciful bullet to the head, rather than the horror that the other hunters preferred to give them instead.

It was perhaps also thanks to that that Zero had grown into a more fair person rather than into just another young hunter much too used to the way the current society worked. His young colleagues at the Hunter Association, for example, had no qualms about using the slaves as much as they felt like.

Still, Yagari may not go out of his way to hurt the vampires, but he would most likely be horrified if he knew that his stance might have in part been one of the reasons that caused Zero to be open minded enough to be getting himself tangled in what he was currently doing.

Zero understood that there were things on which his master and him would not agree – especially since Yagari had a tendency to think Zero would forever be the same little boy in need of protection from pernicious ideas and dangerous influences… The older hunter would needlessly worry if he found out about his disciple's current ideas of 'seeing for himself' what the vampires were truly like.

As such, he thought wisely that it was best to not mention much of this little experiment to anyone.

To absolutely everybody, a hunter visiting the brothels was perfectly normal and wouldn't be frowned upon in the least. Zero was young and full of energy, which made that people would find it even more natural. It was best for everybody that he left things at that, rather than delving any deeper into the reasons why he visited the 'house'.

Not to mention that, to a certain point, Zero was just making up excuses for himself. Sure, finding out more about the vampires was fascinating, kind of like a forbidden exploration that must be kept secret and that matched so well with the questions and ideas the hunter had carried and wondered about for such a long time... But the bare truth was, he felt bad for the pureblood and wanted to ease his suffering, at least a little. The look of haunted misery in those garnet eyes sent a pang of sympathy straight into Zero's heart, and all his instincts screamed at him to alleviate the other's suffering regardless that they were born enemies, and now at the extremes of their worlds, Zero a young hunter with a bright career ahead, and Kaname the fallen royalty of a long gone age, reduced to the worst slavery and deprived of any future or any chances.

Even if there was nothing to find out about the enemy race, the hunter would probably keep coming back anyway, just to ensure that the pureblood wasn't faring too badly.

But for his own sake as well as that of propriety, the 'research' on the true nature of vampires provided a much better excuse, if anything for himself when his hunter instincts kicked in to ask him what in the world he was doing.

For the time being, though, such considerations mattered little. The hunter chuckled softly, inevitably touched by the cute image the embarrassed pureblood made as he downed cream puff after cream puff.

Kaname felt the man's gaze on him and stopped in the middle of a chocolate puff, glancing at the box and mentally dividing the amount left.

He pushed the box a little ways closer to the hunter, mumbling softly "The rest of them should be yours…"

"Don't worry, I can buy that sort of thing any time I feel like. And I brought those for you anyway. They're yours, just eat as many as you want."

There was no need to repeat that order...

And at the moment, the pureblood was too endearing for Zero to feel very weirded out by how compelled he felt to protect him, even though it still surprised him when he stopped to think.

The rest of the evening went by calmly with them finishing the bath and spending some time talking of unimportant things, sitting on the fresh sheets on the bed.

The pureblood was inevitably expecting the hunter to make a move then, and was surprised over and over when it didn't happen. He was still very tense, afraid that the peacefulness of the moment was artificial and about to break any time, so he couldn't manage to relax and jolted slightly whenever Zero shifted on the bed or turned to face him more.

Considering how the handlers and other customers treated the pureblood, it was no wonder that he was as jittery as he was, but Zero firmly hoped that he could get him to be less nervous around him at least. He'd been careful to resist the _**many**_ urges he'd gotten each time he looked at the pureblood's luscious body, so that he wouldn't scare him further, but it seemed like it was to no avail, and Kaname was always waiting for him to jump him or something. Zero knew this was merely because everybody else did precisely that, but a part of him couldn't help but feel guilty wondering if the pureblood could sense the --very real and almost tangible—lust emanating from him.

There was a reason why Zero would get up and dry with his back to the other in hopes that Kaname wouldn't see how hard the sight of his body made the hunter.

Zero's urge to take Kaname was as present as it had been the first day, but he forced himself to not act upon that impulse, so that he wouldn't be like all the… _rapists_ that visited the 'house' each night. Yes, because society may find that acceptable, but Zero was more and more convinced that it was nothing short of rape.

It was a strange situation for Zero, who had no experience with slaves but who got the feeling that this must be what it feels like to try to pet and comfort a small animal that had been abused too much.

He was enjoying the conversation, complicated as it may often be, but he felt a strange misplaced guilt each time he inadvertently made the pureblood jumpy with one of his movements, or if he said something and Kaname immediately assumed he had to shut up or change subject to comply to whatever he thought Zero may want.

The hunter wished there was something he could possibly do to put the other a little more at ease, although perhaps that would take a lot more time.

In the meanwhile, Zero oriented the conversation so that they talked about childhood hobbies –it was mostly him choosing the subjects anyway, since Kaname pretty much just answered his questions, not daring to initiate subjects without knowing whether it was safe or not.

It was heart wrenching, that wistful look that invaded in the pureblood's gaze as he spoke of random innocent things from the past. Even more was the broken tone his voice took as he looked down, forcing himself to go on speaking even though he felt he had no right to talk of that which he could no longer have, with how tainted he was now, after all those years of slavery.

Zero regretted making him talk about it, and changed the subject to a less delicate one, although it had at least been enough for him to find out what the pureblood was interested in. Zero hoped he could use that in future visits, to find subjects of conversation that might over time help make the vampire less worried around him. And now that he had some knowledge of the things the pureblood enjoyed, it also gave him new ideas.

But any attempts of getting things to be more relaxed among them would have to wait the next visit, as Zero eyed the clock and saw that it was getting later and later. Ichiru had said he might be home by dinner time tonight, and lately that was a rare enough occurrence that Zero didn't want to miss it, so he gathered his things and the incriminating pastry packaging etc. –no cream puffs were left, of course—and bid farewell to the pureblood, after asking him once more if he would be okay. He'd gestured to the pureblood's hips, that were visibly still sore from the way he was very much limping as they walked to the door, but of course, Kaname insisted that he was fine, even though it was far from being exactly true.

Zero raised his hand to caress the other's face, in a more or less instinctive movement, but stopped in mid-air when he saw the pureblood tense up even further as the hand got closer to him. And yet, it was Kaname who went after him as Zero turned for the door.

"Please…! Before you go… What is your name …_lord_?"

It sounded so awkward to call him that way, when he was so different from the others… Kaname had been meaning to ask the hunter his name all along, and had even repeated the words in his head several times in preparation, but hadn't dared to speak up, afraid that it might annoy him and break the peaceful moment. But now that the man was about to leave, he couldn't resist any further.

Zero himself would never cease to be a bit weirded out by the way slaves were made to call any hunter _'lord'.  
_He tried to look as reassuring as he could as he turned back and answered.

"It's Zero Kiryuu."

"Shall I call you Lord Kiryuu, then?"

"No way. Call me… call me something else, but not that. I'll be back in two days or so… take care, okay?"

The hunter was already on the way out, and Kaname could only flush slightly and nod before the door closed and he pressed his hand to the wood, belatedly whispering _'you too… You too, Kiryuu-sama.'_

Against what his better judgment and his reason continued to tell him about foolish hopes on dangerously extended periods, Kaname couldn't help but look forward to the next time the man would come to visit him.

.

.

.

[tbc]

* * *

_This time, the chapter title is from "Vampire Heart". X3 (Also one of my favorite songs by HIM.)_

_**NOTE:  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently,**__ it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
__Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweeter Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks__ in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out if__ instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and __was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery__. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

Thank you so much to all the lovely people reviewing, it makes me so happy to read what you think of the fic, and it motivates me to write more~! :D *hearts*

And Happy New Year! XD *lol*


	9. The maze of memories stained

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 9 – "The maze of memories stained."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**Warnings:**__ **AU. Sex slavery**, prostitution, mature themes and **lemons from time to time.**  
Do not read if you're underage or dislike graphic yaoi and dark themes.  
Spoilers for various elements of the VK manga._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Chapter 9 is a bit of an intermediate thing, because some characters who hadn't appeared yet need to be properly introduced into the plot for the progression of the story. ;)  
Chapter 10 should have more Zero with Kaname stuff. :D_

_I'm passing out asleep, but I wanted to post still within today. It's another long one! :D *hopes you'll enjoy it anyway*_

* * *

.

.

Kaname was puzzled.

No, puzzled was by far not a strong enough word. He was _perplexed_.

The first time the hunter –or rather, Zero Kiryuu, now that the pureblood had a name to place on the gentle smile he was afraid to grow too used to—had come to the 'house', his behavior was absolutely incomprehensible.

Not only had he asked the pureblood for his name, but he'd made small talk instead of forcing himself on him, and, the most strange of it all, he had _actually offered him his blood_ to soothe the pain Kaname was feeling from having his fangs torn out. Something that would be already unbelievable for a human, but for a hunter it was downright surreal.

The second time, the hunter had picked him up and taken care of him when the pureblood was at his lowest, completely broken after one of Ichiou's brutal visits. The man had gone as far as staying through the night and reassuring him while he slept. He'd paid the 'house' for the visit, and yet done nothing but allow Kaname to sleep and recoup, much to the pureblood's surprise.

By the time the man returned for a third visit, the pureblood had been convinced that his luck would not last, and that this game he couldn't understand must be coming to an end sometime soon. He'd been marveled by the gift the man had brought him, and had thoroughly enjoyed it, but he had no illusions that either in the bath itself, or as soon as they were out, the man would cast his mask of gentleness aside at some point or another and do something horrible to him.

He'd been so certain that the hunter would brutalize him any time soon that he couldn't even remember if he'd properly thanked the man for the cream puffs. The part of him that was so utterly touched by the unexpected kindness now burned with guilt at this shocking faux pas, but the bitter side of him was quick to remind him of how certain he was that the hunter would drop the act sooner or later.

And yet, the hunter didn't do what the pureblood had feared he would inevitably do.

_At least, not yet._

Each and every single time that Kaname jolted with apprehension, expecting that the man's next movement would be a violent one… each time, he was wrong, and if anything, the hunter had redoubled his gentleness, perhaps realizing how jittery the pureblood was, and doing what he could to reassure him.

This was having all sorts of effects on Kaname.

For one, his deeply abused consciousness, desperately starved for comfort, couldn't help but cling to that much needed gentleness that he craved so badly in a world where everything and everybody seemed to exist to cause him (and vampires in general) nothing but pain.

On another hand, the pureblood knew the world much too well to innocently believe that some random hunter would just pop out of nowhere and be all nice to him for no reason. If Kaname had grown up to adult age among purebloods --as he would have if the war hadn't torn his world apart--, he'd be infinitely skilled at mind games and power games… but even without having had the chance to hone such skills, he instinctively knew enough to be very very scared of anything that seemed _too good to be true_.

Particularly when such kindness mysteriously came from the enemy side.

Even if it had came from the ally side, he knew better than be wide open to unexpected kindness that had no reason to be there. But it coming from a hunter…

There was no possible way this could be anything but a sick twisted game. He knew it… he knew it far too well, and yet it tore his heart apart to think of it that way, to be forced to be wary of that kindness that he needed so desperately and that he was starting to almost rely on, against all that his reason told him.

For far too long, Kaname had lived on a day-by-day basis, looking always towards the future because the past was too horrible to bear. He'd wish to forget the faces of the past customers, or at least he'd act as if he didn't remember them, as if each person coming through the door of his room was there for the first time. In truth, his instincts remembered well, in order to know what to expect, in order to learn to judge who might be a bigger danger to him, but… there was no way he could get back at any of them for anything they did to him –not without making his own situation so desperately worse—so he could only feign that the past didn't exist, so that the horror threatening to drown him wouldn't be as ever present.

He tried with all his will to never dwell of past incidents, and to try and prepare himself to endure the upcoming danger rather than worrying about what could have been different. But this hunter… Kiryuu… he couldn't forget _him_, not even to deceive himself into ignoring the effects the man had on him.

The hunter may have only come to the 'house' three times so far, but he'd left enough of an impression in those three times… Much to Kaname's surprise, he found himself clinging to the image of the man in four occasions already since the last time, whenever he needed to pull strength to endure particularly hard moments with rougher customers.

On the good side at least, his hips felt considerably better. They still hurt, but they were showing surprising progress. It was still difficult to walk without limping, and finding a position to sleep without too much discomfort could be pretty tricky, but it was nowhere as bad as he'd expected.  
Two days had passed since the joints had been dislocated and reset back in place by the hunter. Kaname had expected to limp for a good week or two at the very least, considering the colossal amount of pain he'd been in when the injury happened, but now he was thinking he might be healed within a week or so from now, if things kept improving as well as they had been. It was hard to tell because it also depended a lot on how rough the customers were; they were by far much more likely to worsen the damage than whatever position he could possibly sleep in.

He'd suffered similar injuries in different places in various occasions in the past, and the handlers usually had left him with joints out of place for hours before helping him. Not only that, but the joints had been badly reset more often than not, and it had taken weeks until his body managed to work around the issue and fix everything up –it was only thanks to his pureblood healing that it even healed properly at all, extremely slowed down as it may be. In a lower rank vampire, he might have been damaged permanently, rather than merely limping for a while until things set back properly on their own.

Either this hunter was particularly gifted at treating injuries, or it was the extreme care and gentleness that he'd put into it that had made such a difference, since he'd managed to set it just right and avoided hurting the area more in the process. Whichever it was, Kaname was glad that it had been this man who had found him and helped him with his injury.

But this and all the gentle little details lulled the pureblood into a false sense of safety that worried him because it clashed so much with all that his self-preservation instincts told him.

The cream puffs the hunter had brought… the way he always changed subjects if he saw that the pureblood was very uncomfortable, or the fact that no one had blamed Kaname for the bath petals he'd ruined by dropping the container, further proof that Zero had stuck to his word and claimed it was his idea to pour it all… There were so many little things that continued to puzzle Kaname.

The pureblood's fears weren't entirely based on instinct --or paranoia-- only. He'd been played that way before. The way he was assuming Zero meant to play him.

More than once, in fact. Although the fall had been the hardest the first time.

When he was younger and more innocent, even more open than now, in a moment when he'd been terribly hurt, not long after Ichiou had sold him to the house… A middle-aged hunter had come one day, and been unexpectedly gentle to him.  
At that point, no other customer had ever treated him with gentleness, and at first Kaname couldn't believe his luck to have met that person… youth and lack of experience contributed further to leave him wide open for deception, against all that his instincts told him.  
He'd needed so desperately to believe that there was at least one person in that world that wouldn't hurt him…

The results were rather tragic for him, needless to say.

He was just glad that even in his most foolish moments, when he'd foolishly trusted that man with his own safety, he still hadn't trusted him –or anyone—with that of his loved ones.

He'd been a breath away from asking the man if by any chance he knew Kaien Cross, thinking that they seemed to be likeminded people and thus might be associated in some way. But Cross was Yuuki's protector, and not even faced with certain death or indescribable torture would Kaname ever reveal a name that could lead anyone back to her.  
So he had remained silent, luckily, for the man's gentleness had turned out to be nothing like Cross' one, which was founded on truth and not lies.  
The deceiver had turned out to be as cruel or even more than any other of the more brutal customers, and had just been playing with the pureblood all along, wearing a mask of kindness for as long as he had needed to get enough of the boy's trust before striking.

For once, Ichiou hadn't had anything to do with it, but he'd found out about the whole incident afterwards, and had been extremely amused by it, torturing Kaname with the memory. The old man's raucous laughter had echoed in the room, sounding more and more obscene in his delight, as he further humiliated the deceived pureblood.

When Kaname had trusted the deceiver, he'd been close to thinking the man might help him try to escape the house… he knew now what a foolish notion _that_ was!

He'd found out so much more about the way the current society worked, and the bitterness eating his hope away forced him to concede that in that at least Ichiou was indeed right; there was no escape for him.

The way the current society worked, any slave found outside was pretty much automatically assumed to be a fugitive, unless he was in the company of either his master or someone chosen by the master. In some cases --with a very good reason and the permission of the master-- it could be okay as a momentary thing, but in doubt they always assumed that it was a runaway case, so the slave would be captured by default anyway, to be brought back to his master...or worse, directly to the Hunter Association. _And that was for slave with a collar and everything in order. _

Slaves _without_ a collar found wandering outside, now… The law stipulated that anyone who so wished was in the right to put them to death or make them their own, capturing them and re-registering them at the Association.

In a society of hunters, a lone vampire outside would be like a beacon for every hunter around, and would be spotted within instants.

And so, over the years, the more Kaname knew of the new status quo of this world, the less hope there was left in him.

And the more he knew, the more he understood deeply just how much the current society regarded the vampires as the lowest life form that there could possibly be… condemned forever to be nothing but a sex toy in the hands of whoever was willing to pay, something for anyone to use and abuse at will without remorse, no chance of respite or freedom anywhere in sight, humiliated further and crushed down over and over by fear that if they were left even a tiny inch of freedom, they might one day regain the power they once had.

The slaves were not human, so they did not even have the hope a human might have had of being set free once they were too old to work in pleasure houses. They would stay beautiful and young for centuries, or, in Kaname's case, very much forever, his body regenerating from any damage and always offering a perfect virginal appearance and feel for each new violator. There was no escape anywhere, and each person coming to the 'house' was a new lesson learned on the subject.

Over time, the pureblood had grown more and more apprehensive, and he'd learned well that trusting anyone was the shortest path to destruction. His secrets and fears wouldn't be spilled to anyone, because there _was_ no one he could possibly trust with them.

Even those who would have been his friends and allies --if the world had continued the way it was meant to be before the war tore it apart—the aristocrat vampires… Kaname avoided them as much as he possibly could, knowing that their loyalty to him was dangerous to them and to him, and that even speaking to them could only cause more trouble.  
Most of the time, he didn't even reply when Aidou reiterated foolish attempts to speak to him; or when he did reply it was just to bite back a retort telling the blond to stay away or not speak to him.  
It hurt to have to do that, and he ached to have someone he could confide in, or at the very least someone in the presence of whom he could relax a little bit, but there just wasn't anyone around whom he could be safe with. He knew that if he was foolish enough to get close to them, someone –Ichiou, the 'house' or anyone else—would just go and use that against him, or against the others, or one way or another it would cause trouble.

His situation was even worse than that of a normal slave, because he had to worry about Ichiou on top of the slavery itself. There were days where the weight on his shoulders felt such that he didn't feel he'd be able to get up again… but he simply wasn't given a choice on the subject.

After the first time he'd been deceived, Kaname had learned to not trust foolish hopes anymore. It still happened a second time, though. Not because he was still willing to trust like he had been when he was young and childishly inexperienced, but merely because there were moments when he was much too broken and desperate to manage to avoid falling prey of the utterly primal need his heart had to cling to something to not lose itself completely in the darkness and the horror that threatened to swallow him on a daily basis.

He hadn't trusted the second deceiver as completely as he had trusted the first. He'd known all along that it just _had_ to be a lie, but he'd still fooled himself into hoping it might not be one. And in the end, the fall had still been hard all the same. This one had worked alone –the previous one had had a partner in his act--, but he still hurt the pureblood terribly when he revealed his true self and played with Kaname's feelings of betrayal and hurt, on top of being extremely rough with him physically. That man still returned from time to time even now, although he wasn't a regular of the 'house', luckily. But in Kaname's eyes, it was the same as any other customer, and he refused to give the man the satisfaction to look hurt for the past. Instead, he made sure to always behave as if the man was a completely new customer he'd never seen before, as if the man had never held his trust between his fingers and tore it to pieces, as if nothing had ever happened.

_Because showing his pain would be giving the man more power over him. _

Needless to say, this angered the man and made things much rougher each time, but it was one of the tiny bastions of pride that Kaname had, at times intermingling with his self-preservation instinct, at times working against it.

Usually, the pureblood's self-preservation instinct won over what tiny amount of pride he might still have, if he still did really have any left… but in a few cases like this one, that little barrier of pride helped protect what was left of his heart, if not his body.

He'd learned the lesson very well. He told himself he'd never trust again. He knew better than think the enemy would ever offer him kindness without a heavy price attached to it.

And yet, his abused heart uttered foolish words of hope in his tired mind. _Kiryuu-sama does things in a completely different way. The liars from the past never went as far to help as he did. They never would have offered their blood, such an unthinkable thing._

In that at least his heart was right. That act was an impossible, unforgivable, unthinkable thing, for a hunter. But the very fact that the hunter would actually do something so shocking to help him, without even knowing him, and that he'd come back to bring him comfort and food even…_ once more it was too good to possibly be true._

In the moments when Kaname doubted the most, he almost wished the hunter would just hurry up and drop the act now so that this horrible wait may be over and they might finally move on. Bitterly, he scoffed at the inevitably horrified response of his heart that still managed to hope for something, stupidly clinging to the instant at hand, yearning for more of that momentary reassurance and gentleness, regardless of the fact that the more it soaked in it, the more it would hurt so terribly much later, when the hunter finally shattered this mask apart.

Lost between the fear of the inevitable betrayal that was bound to come, and the absolute need of at least a little bit of comfort, even though he knew it would not last, Kaname found himself trying to decide what he could possibly do to minimize the amount of damage he was bound to receive in the end.

There was nothing he could realistically do to protect himself, especially physically… but maybe he could take a certain stance in his heart and mind to salvage at least some of his feelings in the end. He reached the conclusion that he might as well enjoy the comforts the hunter provided while the man tried to approach him or gain his trust. The key was to _not_ let the hunter actually make his way into his defenses. As long as he received the man's help without truly opening up to him, he should be able to enjoy the moment at hand without having his heart torn apart again when the hunter decided to end the game. He just had to be a better player at it than the other, and to make sure that his mask fooled the other as well, keeping it completely separate from his actual feelings and his aching heart.

_The question would be, was he actually able to do that?_

He wanted to believe it was the case, but it was particularly hard, because the years of abuse had torn far too many holes in his barriers, and he was far too desperate to resist even the tiniest amount of care and gentleness; his heart yearned to open up to it, much as he tried his best to force it to behave.

At the current point, he found himself pacing in his room, once more having a moment of stupidity by hoping that the hunter would come tonight_. He'd said 'two days or so', and after all, it was the second day after the last time, so… maybe…_

He tried to berate himself, tried remind himself that he should just take whatever he could from those encounters without letting the other get too close, but more often than not, his reason and his heart were at odds, making it a constant battle of wills within himself, permanently having to remind himself to be extra cautious and expect the worse anytime, and to keep his heart well under lock, to avoid having even more pieces of it torn off.

Otherwise, there would be nothing left of it very soon, seeing how the past ten years had already eroded it so badly.

---

Far away from the _blood district_ and other seedy areas of the hunter capital, in a luxurious triplex apartment in one of the most refined residential districts, a young blond vampire was flipping through a magazine, affecting a distracted look.

He was sitting with his legs nonchalantly pulled up and his bare feet resting on the couch, a little pile of cushions behind and around him, in part for the comfort and in part because it was a bit cold and he liked cocooning on his corner of his couch, even though it made a bit of a mess. In a normal situation, a slave would most likely get in trouble for such a thing, but he was lucky enough that he didn't have to worry about such things.

A small pile of manga volumes sat on the glass gueridon next to the couch, but currently his whole attention was on the magazine, regardless of the apparently disinterested look he was putting up. Truth to be said, his attention wasn't exactly on the innocent magazine he seemed to be reading, but on the smaller little catalogue he had hidden inside that magazine to flip through in an inconspicuous manner.

His green eyes widened slightly and his heartbeat sped up as he turned a page and his gaze fell on the photo he'd been looking for, of the boy he'd seen before. Someone he'd been thoroughly intrigued by when he met him… although he already knew his grandfather wouldn't approve of the interest.

Across the room, a much older man shifted on the fauteuil he was sitting on, lowering the financial newspaper he'd been reading and glancing at the young vampire.

"Are you cold, Takuma?"

Ichiou –the man on the fauteuil—eyed the fire dying in the fireplace next to which they were sitting, and got up to rekindle it and add some more wood.

"I'm fine… you don't have to bother with it."

Being a vampire, Takuma could only wear certain types of clothes that were considered acceptable for slaves, and those didn't do a great job at keeping one warm. Wearing normal human clothes was usually seen as shocking to anyone living in the current society, and would inevitably get the staff gossiping, which could attract unwanted attention.  
Ichiou had very definitive methods of getting them silent, but you could only have so many servants vanishing before it became dangerous. He had actually made some of them disappear definitely, mostly due to incidents as Takuma grew up.

By now, they both knew well the things they had to do to keep the appearances, and rarely slipped. Takuma was used enough to the situation, being normally of a more cheerful and easygoing nature, but Ichiou hated every second of it, permanently bitter that regardless of all that he'd achieved in the human society, he couldn't have the one thing he wanted most, to be able to introduce Takuma to the world as his heir and as his grandson, instead of hiding the boy as a personal pleasure slave for his protection.

Takuma was safe, as Ichiou would never allow anyone to lay a finger on him, but the humiliation of this situation was unbearable. Ironically, more to Ichiou than to Takuma himself, who simply went on living without asking himself too many questions about how life would be if he wasn't under the protection of his grandfather.

Whatever defects Ichiou may have, and they were many, at least Takuma was lucky enough to be the one person that the old man did care for.

Sometimes, to the point of being annoying.

"I don't want you to be cold. Why don't you wrap yourself in the blanket? I brought it for you."

"Grandfather, as it is, if one of the maids comes I'll have to toss my books aside and look miserable and whatnot anyway. I'm not about to wrap myself in a blanket to have to throw that off really fast too. It's just too big of a hassle. I prefer the cushions, and like I said, I'm fine."

Ichiou sighed heavily, fingers twitching around the firewood he was holding.

_This… this too is your fault, wretched pureblood. May you be doomed._

He shoved the wood into the reborn flames, sending a little wave of sparkles flying deeper into the fireplace, and he imagined that it was Kaname that he was throwing in the fire instead.

Takuma shot his grandfather a curious glance, but the older man didn't say anything, merely getting back up to return to his seat. Mid-way there, Ichiou glanced back at his grandson and changed his mind, picking up his newspaper and moving to the couch Takuma was sitting on instead.

_Oh shit!!_

The blonde scurried to switch to another page _fast_, not wanting to attract his grandfather's attention over what he was actually looking at. Unfortunately, up-close the magazine looked awfully thick with the hidden catalogue inside, and Takuma was as easy to read as an open book the very moment his grandfather looked at the boy's vaguely embarrassed face and then at the page he was feigning to be looking at, which was quite obviously randomly chosen in his hurry.

"I didn't know you had such an interest in…" he looked closer at the page as he sat next to his grandson "…toilet appliances. What a strange choice of reading, Takuma."

"Uhm…"

_Oh, why did he have to pick a stupid furniture & appliances magazine to hide the catalogue in?!_

The younger blond would have laughed if the person next to him had been someone other than his grandfather –well, or at least he would have if it wasn't for the fact that it wasn't exactly safe for him to be alone with people other than his grandfather, since in everybody else's eyes, he was officially supposed to be a pleasure slave like all other vampires--, but he felt rather stupid for being found out so easily, so he just pulled out the catalogue he'd been hiding and handed it to Ichiou without further embarrassing himself.

It was a catalogue put together by various escort agencies that arranged things for people wanting to rent vampire slaves for parties and/or at-home calls.  
The catalogue looked very much like a collection of elegant fashion pictures, some of them quite artistic, with the simple exception that the models in the catalogue were not photographed to demonstrate any clothing, but simply because the slaves were the merchandise itself… although there was also a section with the latest in slave clothing and toys as well.  
The catalogue was sent out regularly to customers having used the services of those agencies in the past.

Ichiou held various parties that the higher ranks of the Hunter Association frequented regularly, so he hired such slaves fairly often. They weren't an absolute necessity for a party, but it made things more interesting in some cases, whether by providing an additional amusement for the guests more directly, or simply as a show.

Many of the important hunter families held balls and parties, and ever since Ichiou got to occupy an important position in the Association, he'd started to host more and more of those over the years as well.

Save for the more obvious differences, the party aspect itself and the use of it to form new alliances and negotiate various things remained very much the same as it was in parties he'd held with the vampires' Elders Council in the past, so he was in well-known territory. He'd initially been worried that he'd have trouble adapting and hiding his true nature among humans, but he had been surprised to see just how much humans could be like vampires –both races shared the same defects, and humans could be as violent and bloodthirsty as the worst of the vampires, albeit not for the same purpose, since vampires were after blood for a reason, while humans spilled that of their enemies for no purpose other than the spilling itself.

Ichiou owed his current position to his mastery in political intrigue, and in part to his contacts with the corrupt president of the Hunter Association, who helped arrange the ex-vampire's forged background and his fake genealogy claiming to come from a hunter family, after the end of the war.

Ichiou had planned everything long ahead, intending to use the Kurans to obtain this safe position in the human society after the vampire world had crumbled.

Although his plan hadn't gone as well as he had hoped, and no advancement in the human society could possibly make him forget the one thing that made him hate Kaname Kuran fiercely whenever he thought of it.

_The revenge of the last Kuran…_

Ichiou hated the fact that in the end, no matter how much he had brutalized Kaname, no matter how much he tried by any means to break him completely, the pureblood had still won, broken as he may be now.

The one thing that Ichiou had most wanted, to have his heir, his beloved grandson free and human, was the only thing he could not obtain.

The long lost secret spell that Haruka Kuran had meant to place on his son, and of which Ichiou had taken advantage of to become human in his stead… If all had gone according to Ichiou's plans, the last step of his strategy would have been to force Kaname to perform the same ritual and give his own life to turn Takuma. Ichiou saw Kaname as nothing more than a child that he could manipulate into doing this, and he did succeed at breaking him utterly, but... somehow, even faced with torture that should have shattered the spirit of the bravest person, the pureblood's very last bastion of resistance was that he would not do the one thing Ichiou most desired in this world. The old monster who had destroyed his life and his family would not have happiness, as long as Kaname continued to resist. It may be a small solace, but it was one nevertheless.

And so, with each breath that Ichiou drew, he hated Kaname a little more for that unbelievable resistance that survived even after he'd broken him so much. It seemed almost impossible that the pureblood would have enough courage and strength left in himself to resist him after how far Ichiou had managed to push him, and considering the edge he had over him after so many years of abuse, but… somehow he did, somehow he went on doing it.

_For now…_

But they had a long time ahead, and Ichiou still hoped to succeed one day. No, not merely hoped. He was _sure_ it was just a matter of time before he eventually managed to crush the pureblood's last resistances.

He hated having to wait, but he knew it was not wasted time, since every minute the boy spent in that hellish place counted. He'd tried all he could and still failed, so he'd finally resigned himself to waiting until the situation ripened, while devising new ways to further break Kaname's spirit. One could only endure so much of that life before finally coming apart.

For now, they would live this way. _Just for now._

Ichiou momentarily pushed away the dark ambitions swirling in his mind and received the catalogue that his grandson was returning to him. Takuma was oblivious to the abyss of cruelty that had opened in Ichiou's mind when he thought of Kaname.

"I picked this up on your desk, Grandfather. I saw that the latest one had come in your mail and I was curious, so I opened it to read it."

"No one saw you, I hope?!"

There was alarm in Ichiou's eyes now, and Takuma was quick to respond, not wanting the older man to launch into a new paranoia towards the staff. They'd had enough incidents of the such in the past.

"No, I was careful to make sure everybody was downstairs when I went in."

"The next time you want something, ask me, don't go exploring through my things. If someone saw you, I'd either have to do something drastic to them, or we'd have to put up another ridiculous show to make them believe you were horribly punished or something."

Ichiou was visibly annoyed, but the edge on his voice held concern rather than any real bite. To the entire rest of the world, he was as cold and calculating as one could possibly be, weighing his chances and moving forward with the deadly precision of the cobra striking its prey.  
With Takuma alone, did his normally colder aura take on this unexpected warmth and protective nature.

Takuma knew that his grandfather really cared, so he refrained from letting the lecture-like tone get to him too much.

"I know grandfather, I know. Sorry."

The blonde boy sighed, running an absentminded finger along the edge of the gueridon.

Ichiou flipped through the pages without stopping on any or paying real attention. Takuma stole glances at him, hoping it wouldn't somehow fall open right on the page with the person he'd been looking at. It didn't, and Ichiou wasn't really looking at the photos, he was just moving the pages out of habit, almost to occupy his fingers, testing their dexterity.  
His newfound hunter strength grew more each time he preyed on Kaname's blood, and it put him far above a normal human in the equivalent age range, but Ichiou still inevitably worried about the fact that his body now aged faster than it did when he was a vampire. This mattered little for children since vampire years and human years were almost the same, but the older you grew, the more it made a difference, due to the fact that vampires lived so much longer than humans, even hunters. Ichiou hated that because of the 'wretched pureblood', his grandson and him didn't age at the same speed, and as such, even if it did take years and years, unless Takuma was turned into a human one day he would be alone and at the mercy of the enemy, once Ichiou died of old age. But for now at least, the old man chased the dark thoughts from his mind. There were countless years ahead before he had to worry about such things, and Kaname himself was likely to die before him, if he wasn't careful. He returned his attention to the catalogue Takuma had handed him.

"What did you want with the slaves catalogue anyway? Oh…"

They eyed each other quickly, then broke eye contact just as fast, both equally embarrassed.

"Takuma, you…"

_Could it be that Takuma wanted him to rent a slave… for him?_

Ichiou had cleared his throat slowly before speaking, and from the hesitant vibe in the air, as well as the vaguely uncertain tone in his normally commanding voice, Takuma quickly realized he was in risk of receiving the ridiculous talk about bees and flowers that he'd escaped a few times before already. _Quick, distract him with anything!!_

"Oh Grandfather, I think I hear someone coming!! Sounds like the maid's footsteps in the corridor!!"

Takuma was quickly pushing towards his Grandfather the magazine he'd been hiding the catalogue in, as well as the cushions he had pulled around himself earlier, and rushed to put his feet down on the ground and do his best to look less cozy and more 'slave-like', as if he seriously expected anyone to open the door any time soon.

Ichiou watched, feeling like there was something off about the boy. He was also quite sure that he didn't hear the maid coming at all, but then, he was always wondering if Takuma's hearing might be better than his own, considering that he was human now and Takuma was not. Although technically, he should still have the same level of hearing than a high class aristocrat vampire –so, more or less the same level he had before turning human—courtesy of the hunter powers and additional strength he'd gained over the years at Kaname's expense.

_The first hunters gained their power and the ability to kill vampires from feeding on the flesh of a pureblood. He'd merely made History repeat itself for his sake._

His own blend of hunter abilities were powered by the flesh of the last Kuran himself, and had flourished in Ichiou's already naturally strong body, turned human with the blood of Haruka Kuran, at the end of the war.

Kaname had survived the ordeal and healed, as purebloods always did, and Ichiou had gone on forcibly taking the boy's blood regularly as well, to gain even more strength over the years.

The maid never did come, but Ichiou was distracted for long enough and Takuma was quick to grab a manga and look deeply engrossed in his reading. All in all, the older man didn't exactly want to have the embarrassing talk with his grandson anymore than the boy himself seemed to want to have it, so Ichiou merely tossed the catalogue aside on the couch and immersed himself back in his newspaper, deciding that this too could wait.

---

Elsewhere, in a definitely less fancy district but still among the upper areas of the city, two perfectly identical young men were getting ready for dinner.

Well, not quite exactly identical, but the only thing making them apart was pretty much the length of their hair, and the fact that the younger one had a more playfully devious air about him, while the older one –albeit merely older by a few minutes—looked gentle but naturally more serious.

The older twin was putting the last touches on a steaming minestrone soup he was about to serve for dinner. He ground some fresh pepper over it, and tasted it once more. It was just right now, and he switched off the stove. They'd prepared much of it together for once, even if he was usually the one doing a large part of the cooking.

From the dining room --separated from the kitchen by a set of double doors that the twins usually left open permanently when no one was visiting—the soft noise of silverware clinking against one another could be heard as the younger twin set the table.

It had been two days since Zero visited Kaname at the 'house' and took him the box of cream puffs. The hunter had returned home early that day, because his brother had told him he'd be home by dinner time. The next day, Zero had been the one that was busy, with a hunting mission that he knew would end up late. But today, luckily the twins would both be able to enjoy another peaceful dinner together.

The phone rang, and the older twin made to go for it, but his brother had rushed and picked up already, so Zero went to get cups for them instead.

Normally, he wouldn't have paid attention, but his brother usually received calls on his cell-phone only, and seemed surprised when he answered the phone, so Zero inevitably got a little curious and listened in the background to the side of the conversation that he could hear, Ichiru's.

'_Why did you call home instead of my cell-phone? I... Oh well, it's fine.' _

'_No, not at all.'_

'_What, you mean now?'_

'_I… I see… No, no, of course not, it's no problem at all.' _

'_Yeah.'_

'_I'll be there in a minute.'_

'_Sure. No problem.'_

Ichiru switched off and came back to the kitchen door, leaning against the frame with a slightly apologetic look on his face.

"Sorry Zero… the guys from the band called, we have a gig soon, and so everybody will be getting together for some last minute rehearsing tonight."

"You guys sure rehearse a lot…"

"…"

"I don't mean that as a bad thing."

"Yeah, well, we're perfectionists."

He chuckled wryly, and the glint of normalcy in his eyes reassured his twin, making him forget the weird little things that always came to Zero's mind... and that left just as fast whenever Ichiru pulled one of those smiles.

Weird little things, such as the fact that the band members normally never called the home phone, or that Ichiru never ever sounded that polite or hesitant when talking to them. If anything, the younger Kiryuu twin was a bossy vocalist, and Zero vaguely got the feeling that Ichiru was more than just the lead of the band, but also the driving force behind it, and that the other band members were very much in his shadow. It seemed strange that they'd decide of some last minute rehearsal and call him out like that right before dinner.

Of course, that impression was based on over-heard one-sided chunks of phone talks and various other little details like that. He hadn't even gone to one of their gigs yet, as Ichiru seemed to be very embarrassed of having his brother seeing him singing, and had vehemently asked Zero to promise he would never try and go to any of the clubs his band played at by surprise or anything.  
Zero promised, of course. He had a tendency to promise pretty much whatever Ichiru asked him, and he always kept a promise made to his brother.

Ichiru smiled an angelical smile that finished dissolving completely whatever tiny doubts had formed in Zero's mind, and asked "I'm hungry though, would you mind if I took some of that soup?"

"You're… taking soup to a band rehearsal?"

"Oh, but Zero's food is the best… I'd much rather have your homely cooking than whatever they'd serve at the bar, you know… Plus, the others would probably love to try! Pleaase?"

Zero couldn't help but fall for his twin's exaggerated pleading look, and automatically laughed fondly. He poured himself a bowl of soup before replacing the heavy lid on the pot and tying a kitchen towel around the pot to hold it in place for safer transportation.

"The small ladle is inside, if you don't shake the pot too much it should stay clean. Do you want to take bowls?"

"No need, we'll just use stuff at hand! Gotta go, see you 'bro!"

Ichiru had already quickly slipped on his jacket and picked up the pot by its thick handles, carrying it as carefully as he could while rushing out.

Zero stood alone in the kitchen, pursing his lips with a look of uncertainty as the entry door slammed shut.

He should have known, it was too good to be true, having Ichiru stay home and have dinner with him often was somewhat rare lately.

Some days he did, other days he arrived after dinner and nibbled on leftovers, occasionally worrying Zero when it looked like he barely ever ate anything. But he looked healthy and fine –much to Zero's amazement, since he was always constantly afraid of Ichiru wrecking his already naturally frail health--, and would always claim he had a bite at this or that place already before coming home, or that he would snack later in the night, and so on.

Zero didn't dare complain really, because to this day he still carried just as heavily the guilt of the curse he was born with, the guilt of what he'd done to Ichiru before they were even born.  
To this day, that guilt still made him put Ichiru's wishes above his own at all times and refrain from doing things that he knew might bother his twin.

If not for him, Ichiru would have been born with a perfect health, and the full power of a hunter born of one of the strongest clans.

But because Zero absorbed part of his power and life while they were still in their mother's womb, Ichiru was born with a frail health and was never strong enough to master any of the hunter arts, much to the despair of Zero and their family members.

Zero because he worried for his twin constantly, driven by his guilt and his love for Ichiru.  
The family because they loved Ichiru as well, of course… but also because they were hunters. The Hunt was their life, and all their instincts told them to reject the weakest link. The twins' parents had adored Zero from the very first instant, twins' curse or not. His power and natural abilities had their parents constantly delighted and brimming with pride.  
Ichiru, on the other hand, was not so lucky. They tried their best to love him, and they did succeed, but… there was never as much love for him as there was for Zero, and even as small children the twins would often notice that sometimes their parents would look at them and their eyes were cold and pained when they brushed over Ichiru, and would lit up with joy and love when they gazed at Zero.

That distressed Zero, who more and more felt that he didn't possibly deserve that love, especially when it seemed that his twin wasn't receiving the same amount. He was sure that their parents did love Ichiru, but it just… wasn't quite the same. And he'd tried so hard to make up for that missing love, that he felt he'd unwittingly stolen, just how he stole so much more from Ichiru. He tried all he could to be there for Ichiru constantly.

And then so much had happened so fast.

They lost their family, but they survived, together.  
Zero believed it was fate. He would have been home, the day Shizuka Hiou murdered their family. Ichiru had planned to go watch a movie that day, and Zero was going to stay home because their parents had insisted that he help them with something or another. But at the last minute Ichiru had asked him to come with him, and Zero would never refuse him, even if he had to disobey their parents for it.

So they'd gone out together, and when they returned, the house was a bloodbath.

Life had been rather complicated for a while afterwards, but their master –who was already by then mostly just Zero's master—had been a considerable help until the twins' coming of age, and was still very present in their lives. The two boys had moved to this apartment, and life had gone on.

Zero had become an active-duty hunter, and was currently one of the very most promising of his generation. He still burned with guilt for Ichiru, but he was glad that Ichiru seemed to be enjoying himself in what he'd chosen for himself. Zero morally supported him as much as he possibly could, encouraging him, defending him when master Yagari criticized his choices, and generally always being a supportive presence that wanted itself unobtrusive and helpful, always there if Ichiru needed him but not trying to pry or meddle with his brother's decisions –Ichiru hated when anyone asked too many questions or tried to poke at his choices.

Zero stared at the bowl of soup he'd poured himself, and which was currently cooling down. He felt suddenly lonely, as he sat down to eat.

Master Yagari often dropped by just to hang out, but he'd been a bit busy those past days, and wouldn't be around tonight either.

Zero had meant to go visit Kaname again the next day, to surprise him with an idea he had.

He was looking forward to going there sortly after the 'house' opening hour to have more time, but he figured it was still relatively early in the evening, and that if he could catch a quick coach and be there soon enough, he'd have time to enjoy the vampire's strangely compelling company for a while still tonight.

Ichiru wouldn't be back until several hours later, if he even came back tonight at all, considering how late the rehearsal was going to start. He might just stay and crash at one of the band member's place rather than come back home which was farther. So there wasn't really a reason for Zero to stay all alone waiting.

The hunter made up his mind as he finished the last of the soup, and got up with a certain eagerness in his step, putting the dishes away quickly and composing a short note for Ichiru just in case, explaining that he might only be back late.

--

Elsewhere in the far outskirts of the city and sometime later, Ichiru was finally arriving at his destination, which for the record looked nothing like a bar or sound studio.

He struggled with the pot of soup as he climbed the stairs of a small apartment complex while rummaging through his pocket for his second set of keys, the one he didn't leave in his main set that Zero may see at home.

The building overlooked a small park with sparse trees, branches more or less covered in snow, at the edge of a playground just in front of the building itself. The capital had a number of green spaces closer to the outskirts of it, like here.

It was a peaceful area, where buildings were farther apart from one another, and houses were the common norm, unlike the more populated areas of the city where the buildings were right next to each other and more and more crowded.

This area was in contrast so much calmer, and not just because the recently fallen snow seemed to muffle all noise. It was an area farther from downtown and other centers of interest of the city, and less and less of the hunters chose to live here, especially the active duty ones who wanted to be closer to the headquarters and the areas of the city more likely to appeal to them.

This was by far no coincidence, nor was it a recent thing. It was precisely the reason why Ichiru had picked this place in particular, originally.

He had always been the weaker of the twins, the one regarded poorly by the hunter Association and even their family… but the twins' late grandmother, who had been rather wealthy, had feared that the boy would be left behind because of his frailness, and knowing how the hunters customs on heirlooms always favored the strongest sibling, she'd made sure to leave much of what she owned directly to Ichiru in her will. She knew Zero would be fine, in his career as a hunter and in life in general, but she feared for Ichiru, and found it unfair for him to have to rely on his twin his whole life, so she'd ensure that he would be fine on his own even if his health prevented him from becoming a hunter.

Zero knew of this and had never resented her. He'd have done the same for Ichiru himself, if he had been able to.

So even before the death of their parents, Ichiru had been the legal owner of a few properties, in particular this pleasant little apartment building in this sparsely populated area by the park, although back then the places had simply been left locked and empty, as the twins' parents were often away in mission and didn't really have enough time to put into managing the places and putting them for rent for Ichiru, who didn't need the profits anyway since then he'd been living with his parents on their Hunter Association stipends, so the apartments had stayed empty until Ichiru's coming of age when he'd started to handle such things and put _some_ of the places for rent.

He finally managed to pull his keys out of his pocket without dropping the pot of soup, and shivered a bit. The stairway and the corridor in front of each floor were open to the garden, which was quite charming in other seasons, but currently snowflakes were floating in the breeze lazily, coming to pile up on the already melting snow on the ground. It was only the third floor, so the cold from the garden really got to you when there was a bit of wind.

Inside, on the other hand, it would be considerably warmer.

The door opened suddenly, before he'd even put the key in the lock, and _she_ smiled softly at him, with that smile that was both indecipherable and utterly charming.

"Shizuka-sama, you didn't have to open for me, I had my keys. Let's get in quick before someone sees you."

"It's fine, there's no one around. You ensured it would be the case yourself…"

"Yes, but I always worry just in case. Hey, I brought soup by the way!"

"Oh, is it made by Zero?"

"… Yes, actually. But I helped him prepare it."

He felt a little stupid, almost childish, the very instant he said it, like a child boasting about something that would make an adult laugh. He just couldn't help a little twinge of jealousy whenever Shizuka showed interest in his brother. It worried him for very opposite reasons too. But for now at least she didn't probe further, simply taking the pot from his hands and stepping back inside while he locked the door and rubbed his hands together –they were numb from carrying the pot in the cold. He removed his jacket and tossed it over a hanger by the little table in the entry area, and took the pot back from her hands, walking to the apartment's small kitchen to reheat it, while she straightened the hem of her luxurious kimono before sitting at the table to watch him through the open door.

"I'm sorry I called you. Did I interrupt something?"

She'd quite simply phoned him and declared _'I'm bored. Come make me dinner.'_  
Which for them was not as bad as it sounded, because Ichiru relished the knowledge that she welcomed his presence, and Shizuka missed his company when he wasn't around… but wasn't about to openly say so.

"It's never a bother from you, Shizuka-sama. You didn't interrupt anything important."

_I'd just prefer if you called on my cell-phone only! _

But he'd known her for years, and knew well that saying such a thing would be like challenging her to call the house phone all the time, which would inevitably ensue in her talking to Zero instead, so he stayed silent and fetched them bowls and plates from the cupboard.

The apartment was entirely furnished by him, in secret, in part four years ago when he'd hid her, and in part over recent years.

At the eyes of a normal human, it looked like a charming little apartment with nothing out of the normal, just like Shizuka herself was a magnificent beauty but didn't seem dangerous in the least… Until you got too close, that is.

In Ichiru's eyes, on the other hand, the walls shone softly with a dim glow in the dark, because as a hunter, he could see the countless seals he'd placed all over the walls himself, so that no one outside would sense the presence of the pureblood hidden inside. Those were not simple spells, and it had taken him years to be able to do that, which made that initially Shizuka had to live with her aura masked constantly, until they could get the spells up.  
He would probably never have been able to do such high level spells if not for the strength he'd gained by drinking her blood over the years. Nowadays, he had to constantly remind himself that he was still supposed to feign being sickly and frail to avoid attracting attention, but in truth, his power was probably on the same level or even higher than Zero's, and he had specialized in hunter spellwork, particularly in ancient ones that the modern-day hunters didn't really delve into, and that most people these days would be completely unable to perform. This was why he'd been able to seal the apartment so well. The only place that wasn't sealed was the door, because Shizuka would never have stayed if this place was a new cage for her.

The door had a mild seal to conceal her presence, but it would not prevent her from going in and out at will, although he strongly hoped she wouldn't do it.

She'd already made occasional forays before, and each time he'd panicked completely. The area may have very few hunters, and purebloods may be very good at masking their aura–when healthy and in full control of their power as she was, at least--, but Ichiru was always afraid that she might be found out one day.

The soup was hot again within minutes, and he brought it to the table in an elegant porcelain bowl, serving Shizuka first and then himself.

Their hands touched when he handed her a napkin, and she smiled at him. His heart swelled in his chest at the sight, and he felt the renewed certainty that he would betray, murder and steal for this woman, if there was ever the need.

.

.

.

[tbc]

_

* * *

_

_As usual, a chapter title coming from a song from HIM. X3 This time, it's a line from the lyrics of "Dead Lovers' Lane". :D_

_The "memories stained" in the title is in reference to Ichiru's betrayal of Zero and their family. (Well, he did change his mind at the last minute and not let Zero be there the day their parents were killed, but he still knew Shizuka would strike and didn't warn them. And he harbored her and provided her with a place to hide for the past four years…)  
Ichiru isn't lying about being a musician, but he doesn't rehearses as much as he claims, obviously. ;) He spends that time with Shizuka._

_And btw, as some of you have guessed, this is indeed not a short fic. XD I'm not sure yet how long it will be exactly, but various things still have to happen… ;)  
__I have the story mostly planned ahead, and so far it's being very fun to write, so I hope you'll all continue to enjoy it as the plot unwraps itself. X3 *hearts*_

_**NOTE:**__  
If you are wondering why they both behave slightly differently, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
__Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweeter Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows better, and is a lot more careful and submissive than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, of being under Ichiou's guardianship etc, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety.  
__**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks__ in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out if__ instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and __was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery__. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	10. To hide my heart

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 10 – "To hide my heart."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings._

_**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**__  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_._

_I wanted to put a note to thank all the wonderful people who have been writing such lovely reviews~! ^_^/  
(I will catch up with the replies one day. XD;;)  
It really makes me so happy to know what you think of the different things in the fic, and it always gets me all re-energized and super motivated to write more!! :D _

_I'm also so touched by the fact that so many people have been reading this story! I never expected it would interest that many people, and I'm so touched! It's been only about a month and a half since I started posting it and yet chapter 1 alone has 4000+ hits already, which absolutely amazes me! O_O_

_It also makes me feel the pressure (because I really want the story to be good and I hope you'll all go on enjoying it as the plot unfolds), but it certainly motivates me SO MUCH! :D  
__So thank you so much, you're all such a wonderful motivation to write~!!_

_This is a fluffy chapter for once! Well, it's CoB, so there's still tons of angst all over, but at least there's no rape or anything this time. XD;; *lol*  
Although there's some lemony stuff… ;D But it's consensual!  
__It's a bit of a slow pace for now because I want Zero and Kaname to get closer and know each other better before things move on. :D *hopes you'll enjoy their fluff… err, angsty, bittersweet fluff* XD *lol*_

* * *

.

.

Zero arrived at the 'house' with a smile on his face and a square package safely concealed in a bag under his arm.

Out of habit, he took a quick look at the display window before entering, but naturally no one of interest was there anymore, since it was way into the peak hours and around this time most of the slaves were already in their rooms, receiving customer after customer.

The blood district was brimming with activity, streets full of people coming out of work late or having had dinner already and going for some 'fun' before returning home. The brothels and other 'teahouses' were crowded with visitors. Until now, Zero had only been there around opening times, and was surprised by the amount of people in the streets and in the lobby of the 'house'. He knew a lot of people went to those places, but he hadn't quite realized just how many.

The husband of the old harpy was at the desk, and his face lit up when he saw Zero push the door open.

"Oh, Mr. Kiryuu! You are quickly becoming a regular of our establishment."

Zero cringed, and wanted to cut the talk short, almost expecting them to offer him a point card or something ridiculous like that, because of the_ 'regular customer'_ talk. He limited himself to the minimum of interaction while filling up the check-in form. The man didn't mind, used to his reluctance and assuming that the occasional glares and somber mood were Zero's usual personality.

The old man, which Zero assumed was the owner –or one of them in any case, as the hunter didn't know if the house was owned by the couple or by only one of the two-- was rather talkative, perhaps happy to see Zero because he was a good customer who stayed long hours and paid all the fees without arguing.  
The hunter simply sighed when he saw that the man had immediately picked up a pen and checked the _'outside toys - extra fee'_ check-box as soon as he saw the bag under Zero's arm, assuming it was something like that.

_After all, what else could he be bringing to that place?_

He wasn't about to tell them what it was anyway, so he just played along.

"You have perfect timing tonight, Mr. Kiryuu, the customer who was with your favorite just left less than a minute before you walked in, so you can go upstairs right away instead of waiting."

A large number of people were waiting to have their turn with the pureblood, but there was a reservation fee for a slave that was currently taken, and many of them were stingy and decided to just line up and arrange things among themselves, waiting without paying to secure a reservation.  
The owner, greedy as ever, shot a little glance in the direction of the teahouse area, where they were waiting. He hadn't told them that the previous customer had just left, and if they complained that he let someone else pass first, he would claim Zero had paid for a reservation. _Let them wait!_

Much to Zero's revulsion, the owner seemed to have taken a liking for him.

_Or better saying, for his quick-to-pay wallet._

At least for once, it turned out to be a good thing more than an annoyance, since otherwise Zero would be waiting in the teahouse for several hours, as the pureblood was extremely popular and had quite a number of people waiting for him around rush hour each night. Zero might have had to go back home if he'd had to wait for them all to pass first. He hadn't quite realized just how busy the house got around rush time. Belatedly, he was wondering if it was a bad idea to come around this time, and whether Kaname would be very tired. But then, if his presence might delay the pureblood having to take on the crowd that was waiting in the teahouse, it couldn't be all that bad…

A handler accompanied the hunter upstairs (more for the habit than anything since Zero already knew where the pureblood's room was), and was dismissed quickly.

Zero closed the door behind himself as he entered, and scanned the room in search of the pureblood. Kaname was nowhere to be seen, but the bed was freshly made and the sound of water could be heard coming from the bathroom.

Apparently, the pureblood heard the room door as well. He'd initially thought it was someone coming to check as usual if he was ready —and if he was in one piece— for the next customer, but when a moment passed without any handlers barging into the bathroom, he realized with horror that they'd simply sent in the next customer directly, and that he was making him wait.  
Much as he hated the words he had no choice but saying, he quickly uttered an apology.

"I'm terribly sorry for making you wait, my lord!"

He'd spoken hurriedly, a moment before rushing out of the bathroom, still drying himself –or trying to, as fast as he could possibly manage, knowing well that whatever he did he'd inevitably already be in trouble anyway, since making a customer wait was one of those things certain to earn you a beating. They paid for the time spent there, and they violently _hated_ slaves trying to slow things down and make them pay extra unnecessarily.

But instead of an angry stranger fuming and waiting to make the slave regret having wasted a customer's time, Kaname found his silver-haired savior standing by the door.  
Zero smiled at him, both saddened and amused by the way the pureblood had rushed out of the bathroom, still holding a towel to himself.

Kaname could only stare back and open his mouth without knowing what to say.

_What was this indescribable feeling swelling in his chest? _

He'd been so certain of his decision that he couldn't possibly let the hunter get too close, knowing that he must remain cold and detached and simply enjoy what he could while it lasted and then endure when the man decided to break the mask and show his true face…

_But if he was so certain, then what was this thrill of delight rushing through all his veins at the sight of the man smiling softly in front of him?! _

_  
Why did the sight of him cause a lump in his throat that matched the burning in his eyes and only made it even harder to find the right words?_

"… I… I wasn't expecting you so late…"

He never knew what to say, with this man. With normal customers, there wasn't really any need to speak, or to be more exact, he wasn't _supposed_ to speak at all, as talking without being ordered to would be like asking to get punished even more.  
Most 'normal' customers just grunted orders or grabbed him and shoved him onto whatever position they wanted, just kicking his legs open or throwing him down on his knees for them.  
But this man… he always looked at him as if he was a living breathing being rather than an object to use to satiate one's needs, and Kaname had spent far too many years being treated like less than trash; having someone act like he was a sentient being was just too strange, making it even harder for him to find his words.

Needless to say, ten years of being used to the idea that speaking was forbidden also made one's conversational skills quite rusty, so their conversations were always awfully awkward and filled with long silences while Zero thought of a new direction to follow and Kaname answered his questions.  
But luckily, Zero had so far always been very understanding, and didn't lose patience with the pureblood despite his moments of silence and awkward pauses. That also never ceased to surprise Kaname.

"I was only going to come visit you tomorrow, but I had some time tonight, so I thought I might as well drop by." Zero was remembering the huge line waiting in the teahouse, and realizing that just as many or more must have come by already. He took a better look at the pureblood, trying to see how he was faring. Several hours had passed since the opening hour, and he could only imagine what the pureblood must already have had to go through tonight.

Kaname endured the scrutiny in silence, dropping his gaze to the ground in the display of submission that years of beatings had forced him to adopt as a mask to protect himself.  
Needless to say, he was completely mistaking the reason why the hunter was casting such an examining gaze on him.

He was still holding the towel to himself, and wondered if he was expected to drop it, but since the hunter didn't give any orders, he didn't want to take an initiative and make it worse. Small nervous tremors ran up his spine, but he forced himself to stay still during the seconds that felt like whole minutes.

The pureblood was standing a bit weirdly, and had been limping rather visibly when he came out of the bathroom. Zero realized Kaname must still be having trouble walking because of the recently dislocated hips. Other than that and the deeply exhausted look the pureblood had, there were a number of bruises, more or less fresh, that weren't the same as the ones Zero saw the previous time, so he must have gotten them since then.

There were other things too, that Zero couldn't see… the way other parts of Kaname's body hurt so terribly much, because of how much abuse he'd taken by this time of the night… or how his jaw was still throbbing, because only a day ago the 'house' had had his fangs torn out again. They had regrown a bit faster this week since he'd been given blood for his injuries some days ago and that always accelerated the process.  
The previous day and night had been a living nightmare, as the pureblood was completely groggy from the drugs and in horrible pain, especially since the customers were inevitably very intent on using his freshly defanged mouth.

Luckily he was feeling better today, or at least less bad, but his body was covered in a web of bruises, courtesy of the anger of a large number of the previous day's customers, irritated by how slow he was with his mind and blood so clouded by the potent anti-vampire drugs; they were made to prevent him from using his powers, but on top of also slowing down his healing they were overkill and left him completely dazed even though he'd gotten the shots in the morning of the previous day.

There were some particularly nasty bruises along the pureblood's jaw and around his neck, as well as many all over his arms and legs, mostly in places that told a clear story of how he'd gotten them.  
Zero's body temperature rose slightly, in a mixture of anger towards the ones taking advantage of the pureblood –a protectiveness that surprised the hunter himself—and for a smaller part, …heat due to less noble ideas prompted by the location of some of those bruises.

Zero would never wish to do to Kaname what those people did, in that he didn't want to _rape_ the pureblood like others regularly did, but… the hunter was only human, and the mind image of Kaname bent forward on his knees on the bed, held in place by hands tightly gripping his arms from behind … Zero's pants suddenly felt a lot tighter than a moment ago, and his face also felt hotter than before. Suddenly, he was very glad that the pureblood's eyes were still cast down, because that meant Kaname wasn't seeing the ridiculous flush that took over his face at the idea of the pureblood in such a position, offered for the taking. It was inevitably a turn on, even though Zero was also horrified with himself for having such a mind imaged while looking at the battered body in front of him.

_No, no, no, must focus!! Can't think of that! _

If he started thinking of _that_ every single time he laid eyes on Kaname's…… _surprisingly sensual, luscious and desirable bod-… _err, on Kaname's body, he'd be no better than the others, in his opinion.

A bit late, Zero realized the pureblood's skin was getting slightly more flushed than a moment ago, and he was breathing more shallowly now, his whole body rigidly tense as if he was expecting to be hit anytime soon._ Unless he wasn't expecting to be hit, but to be…_

With horror, Zero realized what impression he must be giving with his silent staring examination.

"Ah! It's not what it seems at all! I was just looking to see if you were hurt."

The pureblood looked up, still tense, and when their eyes met for a brief instant, the hunter saw clearly that Kaname didn't believe him. The pureblood quickly looked away, expecting to have made things worse. He didn't know however, that Zero was feeling quite guilty. _So much for reassuring him…_

Kaname's voice was subdued and artificially calm when he replied.

"It's okay really… you don't have to… "

…_to make up excuses._

Not exactly something safe to say so bluntly, so the words died on his lips. _This_ hunter may not have brutalized him so far, but there was no need to hasten the inevitable in a way that would make it more painful than it would naturally be.

But he just felt so tired of this constant worrying and waiting for the worst. Not knowing when it would come was wearing him out, because the knowledge that it would inevitably happen simply wouldn't go away.  
If he didn't know better, he'd have said_ 'You don't have to make up excuses to do what everybody else comes here for. You've paid already anyway… you own me for the upcoming few hours, so just stop dragging on this unbearable wait and do as you please already!'_

Of course, unbearable as the wait may be, the inevitable horror at the end of it was even more frightening in Kaname's eyes, so he would certainly not say something that might anger the other. Even this nerve-wrecking growing apprehension was better than the moment the pureblood just _knew_ would come sooner or later, when the hunter would cast aside the gentleness that could only be fake and do his worst.

Wanting a way out, any possible way out of the growing uneasiness in the air between them, the pureblood broke the silence again, nervousness practically dripping from his hesitant voice as he lowered his head again._ It was easier if he didn't have to look at the man, if he didn't have to see when he would drop the gentle expression and get a cruel one instead._

"Would you like to have me naked or back in the… in the outfit, _lord_?"

Bondage outfit, more exactly, as what he was made to wear for the customers of the 'house' was almost always that rather than actual clothing. Currently, the pureblood was currently still nude, as he'd been finishing his shower when he heard the hunter come in.

However much he may hate the wretched bondage gear, Kaname deeply hoped the man wouldn't say 'naked'. He was afraid that it would mean that the inevitable moment he feared would come tonight after all.  
And then again, he wasn't sure which would be worse –after all, the outfit wouldn't stop anyone from doing anything to him anyway…

Unaware of the pureblood's worries, Zero was slightly kicking himself inwardly, because only now it occurred to him that even with the heating on full blast around the bed area –for the comfort of the customers, naturally, not of the slaves—in the middle of the winter it must be rather unpleasant to be _constantly_ nearly naked as the vampires were made to be. He suddenly wondered if the shivering that he'd witnessed on several occasion was entirely caused by apprehension alone, and how much of it was actually cold.  
He himself was rather hot, as he was still wearing his thicker outside jacket which he'd put on because it was snowing when he left, on top of a shirt and a sweater. It was a casual jacket with handy pockets, somewhat longish and reaching the tops of the thighs, which was convenient in cold days, so Zero wore it often during the winter. Presently, an idea was coming to his mind as he answered the pureblood's question…

"I thought I told you you didn't have to call me _'lord'_… And don't bother putting back on what you were wearing before."

A cold wave washed over the pureblood as worry rushed through his veins. _Oh no…_

He was inevitably assuming that he must have angered the hunter by accidentally calling him 'lord' –habits were hard to drop after ten years being forced to address any customer that way—and… he was also quite certain that the hunter most definitely intended to take him tonight.

Kaname nearly stepped back in worry at the idea, but stopped himself at the last instant, forcing his body to be still and hold the submissive posture he so hated, knowing that trying to delay the inevitable further would make it much worse.

He was naturally quite puzzled then, when instead of hitting him or doing anything sexual to him, the hunter pulled off his own jacket and handed it to him.

"Here, wear this while I'm here."

Kaname stared at him as if he didn't understand, or couldn't comprehend the unforeseen order, so Zero just wrapped the jacket around the pureblood's shoulders and patted him in the arm with a mix of embarrassment and reassuring gentleness, before turning around and walking up to the bed –in part to prevent himself from staring while Kaname dropped the towel and slid the jacket on.

The bed was visibly the most comfortable piece of furniture in the room, contrasting with the small divan nearby, which looked more decorative than anything else. The hunter sat down on the border of it and motioned for the pureblood to approach.

Kaname did, after finally shaking himself out of his unmoving state and sliding his arms through the sleeves of the jacket. Unsure of whether he was expected to leave it hanging open or fasten it shut, he haphazardly held it mostly closed with his hands, until Zero made a little gesture indicating he could zip it shut, and the pureblood complied quickly, still surprised.

He knew he wasn't allowed to wear normal clothes, but disobeying a customer would be the worst possible, so the pureblood technically had no choice other than wear it anyway… and once he was in the jacket, he realized with amazement just how incredibly warm it was. The effect was made even more impressive by the fact the jacket was already warmed by Zero's body heat, so Kaname didn't have to adjust to putting it on cold. It was his skin that was cold from having been naked until now, and the jacket's contact was pure delight in contrast.

Zero had a much more muscular build than Kaname, something that would have been inevitable due to their natures even if Kaname hadn't been a slave, but it was even more visible since Kaname's body had been weakened by the anti-vampire drugs for so many years as he grew up, and as a side-effect he hadn't gotten quite as tall or strongly built as he might have otherwise. The pureblood was a little less tall than the hunter, and had much more slender arms and legs. It wasn't a considerable difference, but it was still more than what might have been the case if he'd grown up without the drugs hindering so much of a vampire's natural functions.

And then again, all purebloods naturally did have a more androgynous beauty and more delicately built bodies than humans and other vampire classes anyway, so even if he'd grown up free he would probably have had the same curves and slender limbs and would just have been a little taller and physically stronger than he was now.

In the situation at hand in any case, the hunter's broader shoulders made that his jacket was too big on the pureblood, and the tip of the sleeves didn't simply stop little ways past the wrists as it did on Zero, they went instead a good inch or two lower, about halfway down on Kaname's hands.  
Zero saw this and couldn't help but find it strangely adorable how the pureblood's fingers stuck out of the sleeves, the oversized garment giving him a more innocent look… if you ignored the attractive bare legs and the fact that no matter what Kaname wore, he looked good enough to eat.  
There was an absolutely irresistibly sensual vibe about the pureblood at all times; Zero didn't know if that was due only to the natural features all purebloods were born with or if it was Kaname in particular that was that way, but it made everything about the pureblood seem always permanently luscious and lust-inducing.  
It also made concentrating around him quite difficult each time that Zero came over, especially since the hunter was desperately trying to resist the temptation.

_If it was like that even for humans, how did the other vampires perceive the purebloods?_

Zero knew that technically, pureblood vampires had 'built-in' pheromones to make others around them –especially fellow vampires—perceive them as extremely desirable and superior, but this was… so much more than what he'd expected. It was practically like Kaname had a scent or a general vibe about him that was begging anyone around to jump him.

As much as Zero may be tempted to do exactly that, he realized what a horrible curse such a thing must be, and had to feel bad for the pureblood.

Technically, all vampires had a certain something in them that made others find them extremely beautiful and alluring, yet another thing that hunters used as an argument in their theory that nature meant the vampires to be pleasure slaves, since their bodies were naturally made for seduction.

Evolution might have meant this as something to attract prey by seducing humans, and, in the case of purebloods, something to instill into other vampires the idea that they were to be revered and adored, but in a world where they were deprived of their power and anything they could use to defend themselves, on top of being reduced to captivity and enslaved… that scent or whatever it was must be horrifying to live with.

Now that the vampires were at the mercy of their enemies, that natural something -- both natural charm and pheromones -- that they couldn't shut off was drawing in people intent on abusing them, instead of prey or potential mates.

Until some days ago, Zero might have snorted and sided with the majority of hunters in thinking _'serves them well!'_  
Maybe not. He wasn't quite sure how he'd have reacted, in truth. He might have said that, out of automatic hunter reaction or not, depending on the mood he was in, then… _**Now**_ on the other hand, the mere idea made him inevitably cringe a little, because it instantly conjured images of cruel tormentors cornering _this_ vampire against a wall … The same vampire whom Zero was currently watching from the corner of his eyes as Kaname cutely tried to disguise the delight on his face at the warmth of the hunter's jacket.

The hunter gestured for the pureblood to sit near him, and Kaname complied immediately, worried but still surprised that the hunter hadn't made any move towards him yet.

But the surprise would only grow even bigger.

Zero pulled something out of the bag he'd brought with him, and handed it to Kaname.

It was a square package, wrapped in a beautiful dark brown paper with a glossy surface and a black satiny ribbon around it, tied in a flourish on the top.

The pureblood's initial reaction was to think with delight that it must be food of some sort, but when he took the package from the hunter's fingers, he nearly dropped it. He'd been expecting it to be some sort of pastries, or maybe a box of chocolates from the shape, but it was much heavier than he'd thought.

He glanced at the man with an uncertain look, holding the package close to himself. Zero had an amused look on his face.

"Go on, open. It's a gift for you."

Kaname swallowed dry, still filled with uncertainty. On one hand, it was a magical experience… on another hand, he'd suffered far too much to believe someone would bring him a real gift, so there was more apprehension than eagerness as he opened the package, fearing what he might find inside.

He was stunned to the point of being speechless.

Once the ribbon and the wrapper had been removed, he pulled aside the layers of protective silk paper beneath and found himself holding in his hands a heavy chess set, of a beautiful dark mahogany, with the squares made of polished marble, securely embedded in the wood. It was gorgeous, and must have been rather expensive.

_But… How…_

_How did he know…?_

And then he remembered telling Zero of how he loved playing chess as a child, and how he would challenge his father as often as he could when he was small…

_The hunter had remembered that…? Remembered __**and**__ brought him such a princely gift…?_

Kaname was so taken aback that he couldn't reply, and for a moment even forgot to breathe. He looked so stunned that Zero even got worried that there might be something wrong.

The hunter pointed at a small ornate little lock on the side of the board, and explained "there's a lock here. The board itself is a box, and the pieces are stored inside."

He demonstrated as he spoke, opening it. The box revealed a black and a white set of pieces, sculpted in marble. The white ones were Italian Carrara marble, and the black ones were Turkish black marble. The whole set was bathed in the pleasant scent of the wood the box was made of.

Zero was no chess specialist, but he'd played it a bit too, although not with that much dedication, more like a fun thing Ichiru and him would do from time to time as kids. But he could tell a beautiful set when he saw one, and he was glad he'd picked this one. He felt a certain pride when looking at the elegant pieces gleaming darkly in their individual spots inside the box; this was a present that was sure to please.

But to his surprise, the pureblood looked anything but happy, and Zero couldn't understand what was wrong.

Kaname closed the box softly, holding onto it tightly, head bowed because he didn't want the other to see how his eyes were filled with tears, threatening to spill and roll down his face anytime now. The pureblood's dark hair concealed the look of pain in his eyes.

He was holding his breath, certain that if he let it go he'd ineluctably start crying.

"Kaname… What's wrong?"

The pureblood's shoulders were shaking slightly. Zero couldn't understand, and pondered if there was such a colossal difference between their species or cultures that something that seemed beautiful to one may seem like an insulting gift to the other or something, ridiculous as the notion may seem.

A tear fell on the chessboard and rolled down the marble top, before the pureblood quickly wiped it off with his fingers, too late to hide it.

"Kaname…? Talk to me."

A direct order from a hunter, he couldn't evade. The pureblood shifted but didn't raise his head. He replied, in a forlorn voice. "I'm so sorry, but… I can't keep it… they'll confiscate it. Even if I had a place where I could hide it, it would be too dangerous."

Anything left behind was treated as something a customer had forgotten, and was taken away. If a slave was found trying to actually _hide_ something, on the other hand, it would be theft, and the consequences would be tragic.

_That's it…? He's so desolate because of so little?_

Belatedly, Zero realized just how much the gift must have truly pleased the pureblood for him to feel so dejected at the idea of having to return it.

"That's not a problem. You can still have it, and I'll simply take it home with me and then bring it back each time I come to see you. That way… well, if you feel like it of course, we could play with it, and continue the game the next time if we can't finish it in one sitting."

The pureblood was so surprised that he actually raised his head, momentarily forgetting his embarrassing tear-filled eyes and flushed cheeks.

"Wh-… Is…. Is such a thing really okay…?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"And… and you would want to play with me?"

_Play with a slave…?!_

There was only _one_ game that hunters normally played with slaves, and it was by far not chess. Nor was it pleasant, well, for the slaves in any case.  
Zero had actually demonstrated more tact than usual, by making sure to mention 'we could play _with it_' instead of merely saying 'we could play' and risking the pureblood somehow assuming he was talking about sex.  
He explained further. "Well, I'm a bit rusty, but it could be fun, no…? Usually we mostly sit around and talk, I figured this could pass the time in a pleasant manner as well, by playing chess while chatting…"

'_Pass the time?' Why would you want to 'pass the time'…?! You are paying the 'house' for each hour spent with me… Why would you pay for my company and not do anything to me…??_

But Kaname wasn't about to ask the hunter that, of course, although he did shoot him a few quizzical glances while attempting to sort out his own thoughts.

The puzzling lack of logic –from Kaname's point of view at least-- in the hunter's behavior reminded the pureblood of his cautious instincts and of his decision to keep his heart as locked as he possibly could, since things were visibly too good to believe. _But surely, accepting this gift couldn't do any harm, could it…?_

At this point, even if Kaname's reason had insisted that it was a poisoned gift that must be cast away, the pureblood might not have been able to do so. His fingers were clinging to the board with all he had. Chess had been one of his absolute passions as a child, and he'd long believed he'd never get to play it again. Sometimes, when he was alone in the dark, during the few hours the slaves were left to sleep and recoup for the next night, he found himself staring at the canopy of the bed, imagining the board in his mind and mentally moving the pieces… but the mind image had never lived up to a real board, and he wasn't really able to play that way, especially not with his mind dulled by the anti-vampire drugs and by the exhaustion of each day, prompting him to slip into an agitated sleep before he could truly play anything.

_But this!_ _This was like a dream coming true right before his eyes. _

It seemed so wonderful that even knowing that it _**had**_ to be too good to be true, it was impossible to resist. And, as he kept repeating to himself, _there could be no harm in accepting it…?_

If he was right, when the hunter stopped being gentle, he'd lose everything he'd done for him anyway… so he might as well enjoy whatever he could get for now, right? It didn't clash with his decision to be wary and cautious, after all. …Even if in his mind it just sounded like he was making up excuses for himself, to be able to accept the gift no matter what…

_Ah, let tomorrow tell if he was foolish in accepting or not!_

"I don't understand… why you would bring me such a precious present. But I am deeply touched and so very grateful for it. I will gladly keep it, since you offered."

Beyond the politeness, he really was deeply touched. _It was a bit late to hide it, considering he'd ridiculed himself enough by crying over it._

Zero was already about to say not to sweat it, but the pureblood continued, hesitant.

"I…"

Kaname was torn by completely contradictory urges, at the moment. Even with the fear that the hunter might be out to betray him, Kaname felt compelled to repay him for the gift, and a part of him that was perhaps much too crazy and reckless also whispered to him that rather than tremble in fear waiting for the inevitable, he might as well seize things into his own hands for the time being.

Not finding the right words to express all that he was feeling, Kaname just set the chessboard down on the bed and slid to his knees on the ground, less fluidly than he might normally, as his hips were still giving him a hard time.

In a heartbeat, he was kneeling in front of the other, or more exactly, between his legs, and his nimble fingers were on the hunter's pants zipper.

Zero was, to say the least, rather surprised.

"Hey, hey, what are you doing?!"

Not that what the pureblood was doing didn't send a spike of molten heat straight to Zero's groin the very instant he saw Kaname drop to his knees in front of him, but… the hunter's decency and principles made that he felt obliged to oppose some resistance, if anything in case the pureblood was doing this because he felt forced to one way or another.

But Zero also had in mind the vivid memory of the amazing experience that having the pureblood's lips around him had been, the first time he came to the 'house'.

He didn't want to think of all that the pureblood had gone through that caused him to develop such skills, but there was no doubt that Kaname's mastery in bed was something spectacular. And the moment of distraction at the memory of the earth-shattering orgasm he'd had the last time made that by the time Zero snapped out of it, Kaname already had popped the button of the hunter's pants and was pulling his –embarrassingly already hard—flesh out of the confines of pants and underwear.

"Kaname… you… you don't have to."

It was already hard to concentrate with the pureblood's slender fingers around him, but when Kaname parted his lips and let the tip of a delicate pink tongue peek out to tease the head of Zero's erection tantalizingly slowly, the hunter pretty much forgot what he was saying.

"Stop me if you don't like it, Kiryuu-sama…"

Zero was pretty sure he was going to protest about something. Either the use of the honorific or the fact that Kaname was still there on his knees when he'd told him he didn't have to… or… or _something_. The hunter's brain blanked out the moment the pureblood's warm lips engulfed him, and at the present moment, Zero was having quite some trouble thinking coherently. His mind was very much empty other than for the repeated string of expletives about how amazing this felt.

Kaname had pumped the hard flesh in his mouth a few times before pulling out and continuing the same movement with one hand while his lips and his tongue moved up and down the hunter's arousal, lavishing it with single-minded attention and providing amazing stimuli on various areas simultaneously as his teasing tongue slid over the hard flesh in a maddening dance that touched each spot with perfect timing to the rhythm of the pureblood's hand movements.  
Kaname's lips closed over the head of Zero's arousal again, tongue flicking over the slit to wipe away the clear liquid that was about to drip out. Zero's fingers clenched on the sides of the bed he was still sitting on, knuckles nearly turning white, and he couldn't hold back a throaty moan anymore.

The pureblood smiled inwardly, belying the nervous tenseness that was still haunting him. _At least, he's enjoying it…_ He'd been initially afraid that the hunter might punish him for the initiative, but Zero seemed to be too much into it for that to be likely, or at least the pureblood hoped so. It was so much easier to read the other customers and guess what they might or might not do. This one was… way too unpredictable for that.

Fears aside, Kaname sincerely wanted to do this. Because he had nothing else that he could possibly give to repay the hunter. He was a slave, and not even his body belonged to him, so a special service was the only thing he could do to try and give back a little. And at least, in those moments, he was slightly in charge and didn't have to worry as much about what the other might suddenly do to him… except that it was a double edged blade once again, since there was nothing to say that the hunter would simply throw him down and take him instead of letting him finish, or even after he finished.

But then, the hunter could do the same thing at absolutely any time he so wished anyway, so it didn't change much. Kaname had no right to refuse, or even any hope that it would somehow not happen any time.  
But in a way, he was torn between the urge to provide this pleasure to repay the hunter, and the inevitable fear that it would cause things to go way farther than he felt comfortable with.

The pureblood was pulled out of his musings by a sudden contact that startled him slightly. He was still pumping the hunter's glistening flesh, lips and tongue tracing intensely arousing semi-circles along each side of it while he pumped it… when the soft weight of the hunter's hand on his hair made him jolt.

Countless people pushed his head down, yanked his hair, or other random variations of such things whenever he was made to give them blowjobs, but what surprised him deeply was that what the hunter was doing was completely different from that.

Zero was still sitting, although in a less dignified manner now as the pleasure had liquefied his hesitation and he was bucking earnestly into the pureblood's hand and mouth while moaning in the back of his throat, almost keening softly… but all along, he was also forcing himself not to buck too hard, and was stroking the pureblood's hair in a succession of gentle caresses.

Unlike what most customers usually did, he wasn't trying to regulate the speed at which Kaname moved –terribly tempted as he may be— nor was he trying to force himself into the pureblood's mouth any harder or anything… he was just letting Kaname do it at his own pace, while gently petting his hair, fingers caressing the dark head softly, running between the locks smoothly, the contact completely different from anything the pureblood had experienced in years and years.

Kaname's movements became less precise and less skilled, strangely. He didn't understand what was hurting so much in his heart, but he was having more and more trouble doing it right, and then, all of a sudden, he stopped dead in his tracks when he noticed that the hunter was not moving anymore.

It took him a moment to realize what Zero was staring at, and then Kaname finally noticed that he had tears running down his cheeks, and that the hunter was looking at him with concern.

He hadn't even felt when he'd started crying. The hunter's unexpected gentle caresses had swept him off his feet, so to speak, and his body had reacted automatically to the intense ache in his heart. He hadn't realized just how starved he'd been for a simple contact that wasn't meant to hurt him.

"…ah… I… I'm sorry… I…"

The pureblood's hands went for his face, ashamed of the display and wishing he could hide it, and in the immediate, terribly worried about having stopped in the middle of the blowjob. Any other customer would beat him for the interruption, but Zero merely reached down and pulled the pureblood up, making him sit next to him on the bed. Kaname let himself be guided to whatever position the hunter wanted him in, partially out of habit and partially because he just simply didn't know what he was expected to do, and feared immediate punishment regardless of the gentleness the hunter had displayed. But to his renewed surprise, all Zero did was pull him close and hold him.

"Are you okay?"

The question registered in the pureblood's increasingly clouded mind, and he weighed each word, turning them around in his head and trying to understand what the hunter was asking him to do, but it just didn't compute. It was not a question people normally asked him, and he didn't know what to answer, especially in a moment where he felt so dazed. At this point, he didn't even know why the tears weren't stopping no matter how hard he tried to regain control of himself.

"I… I'm not sure."

Kaname's reply came out in a voice so broken and lost that Zero's eyes widened.

The hunter carefully pulled them backwards to tumble onto the bed, turning onto his side and pulling the pureblood closer into his arms, almost cradling him to his chest while he started caressing Kaname's head again, whispering reassurances into his ear as he'd done when he'd helped him after the pureblood had been so terribly hurt by Ichiou.  
Zero wasn't sure of the proper way to comfort a vampire, or –for that matter, anyone human or not who'd been so badly abused—, but the simple gestures from childhood that Ichiru and him had shared countless times had worked already once before, so he figured they would work again.

"Shh… sh… It's okay. No one's going to hurt you while I'm here."

Zero's words came out on instinct, a reflection of the urge he had to protect the pureblood, but the promise actually surprised the hunter himself, especially since he'd had to correct the sentence just before he voiced it: his first instinct was to say _'I won't let anyone hurt you anymore'_ but that was hardly a promise he could keep, wasn't it?

A wave of bitterness washed through the hunter at the idea that this person shivering in his arms, that was already so broken, would go on being hurt each day, and that there was _**nothing**_ he could do to prevent it.

_When did he become so protective of the vampire? _

Was it because he'd seen him so broken already and feared what might happen if Kaname got so much more hurt that he didn't manage to come back from it the next time? Or was it because of the pureblood's surprisingly adorable earnestness in trying to repay the hunter for things regardless of how desperate his own situation was?

Kaname was fighting a battle of wills within himself. His heart was in too much pain and just needing the contact far too much for him to try in any way to get out of the hunter's soothing embrace, while his reason told him that the man may be gentle now, but that he'd inevitably punish him for the interruption sooner or later. Still dazed and unsure of what he was doing exactly, Kaname hesitantly tried to reach for the hunter's arousal, intent on finishing the job.

Zero had been too concerned by Kaname's distress and had just pulled him into his arms without immediately bothering to zip up etc., so the pureblood's fingers found what they were looking for easily enough… except that it was completely _not_ in the state he'd been expecting, to the point that he was almost as surprised by the contact as the hunter was, when his fingers wrapped around the other's flesh. He pulled his hand back right away, as if something had bitten him, and actually had to touch again, curling his fingers around it and then shifting on the bed so that he could actually see for himself before he believed what his fingers told him.

Zero was starting to turn a deep shade of pink wondering what in the world the pureblood was doing and why he looked so surprised, but Kaname was absolutely mesmerized.

_The hunter's erection was gone. _

Kaname had to refrain from poking him to make sure, so disbelieving he was.

He expected the hunter's kindness and comforting gestures to be just an act all along, so naturally, he assumed that even though Zero was holding him gently in his arms and acting so worried and concerned… it couldn't be true, so the hunter must still be hard and waiting for completion. To see for himself that Zero was actually soft and limp was completely unexpected. The pureblood held his breath, not knowing if there could be another reason for this and if he'd be foolish if he took it to mean that Zero's concern and worry for him were real.

The hunter was embarrassed enough by the staring and touching –not to mention worried that Kaname's poking might reawaken his urges for good and make things more difficult to resist—, so he quickly readjusted his clothes and zipped and buttoned his pants.

Kaname was still staring at it disappearing into the pants, a shocked look in his eyes.

"You're… not hard…"

The pureblood kicked himself inwardly the moment after the words left his lips, afraid he might have sounded offending, but Zero merely reacted to the enormity of the obvious statement.

"Of course not! You started crying and I was so worried for you… it just… uhm… went down…"

Zero's voice died off into a nearly inaudible level by the end of the sentence. _Must it be so embarrassing??_ He flushed a deep shade of red as he said the words, maybe particularly because of the absolutely startled expression of disbelieving shock on the pureblood's face, openly staring at him as Zero spoke.

It wasn't the same as the look the pureblood had in his eyes when Zero could tell that Kaname hadn't believed something he said, though.

This time, the pureblood looked like he desperately _wanted_ to believe, and was afraid of it not being true. He was just so shocked that something so unbelievable could actually be true, and that someone would be concerned for him enough that their body would put the lust in a secondary place. It might have been laughable if the hunter didn't realize just how much pain the pureblood must have been carrying all along, for something so ridiculously simple and physiological to make such a deep impression on him.

Kaname was still trying to get a hold of himself, rather unsuccessfully.

"But.. I… I should finish…"

He hated how stupid he sounded as he gestured for the hunter's zipper almost pleadingly. Or the fact that there were still fresh tears sliding down his cheeks.  
Zero pushed the pureblood's hands away, closing his own over them.

"Another time, okay?"

He slid an arm around the pureblood's back and pulled him closer, resting his chin on Kaname's head gently while he wrapped his arms around the pureblood's back and caressed his back and head soothingly. The pureblood practically burrowed against his chest, his whole body shaking softly as he desperately fought the urge to cry that had reawakened anew. _Why did he always feel like breaking into sobs when this man held him gently?! Why could he not resist the need for contact and remain cold and careful as he'd planned to?! Why was it so difficult to resist this man's embrace?!_

Kaname couldn't help but think that if Zero was indeed just playing him as he thought, then he was a complete master at it. Which meant that either the hunter's kindness was real –which the pureblood was pretty sure was definitely impossible—or he was far more dangerous than Kaname had initially imagined, a thought that sent a shiver of renewed fear skittering up the pureblood's spine.

Never had he encountered someone capable to act so well, or with such amazing control. Even the ones who had fooled him before hadn't been able to display an ounce of the amount of care that Zero displayed, because his gentleness felt so terribly genuine that it went straight into Kaname's bleeding heart, right in the way he most desperately needed.

The pureblood choked a strangled sob and couldn't prevent himself from momentarily forgetting all the restraint that he'd meant to display to protect himself.

They stayed in that position for quite a while, Zero patiently soothing the pureblood, caressing his hair and whispering gentle words. It took quite some time, but eventually the pureblood started to calm down little by little, and his physical sensations managed to pierce through his mental distress, making him realize at last just how much his hips were hurting in that position. He tried shifting his leg a little to see if that would make it less bad, but because he was laying on his side, the higher leg didn't have as good support as the one on the bed, and its weight pulled on the joint in a painful manner. Zero caught on all the shifting around, and realized the pureblood was uncomfortable.

"Hey, what do you say we play that chess game now? If you feel like it, that is."

Kaname once more didn't know exactly how to respond properly to the hunter's offer, and just nodded after giving up on trying to talk. Zero helped him shift onto a position where he'd be more comfortable --laying on his belly along the bed's length-- and then started setting the board while Kaname marveled at the fact the hunter hadn't touched him any more than the necessary to help him –inevitably he'd been automatically expecting Zero to do a lot more than that, when he found himself laying down in that position.

And truth to be said, Zero did have to quickly move away, because the jacket may technically reach low enough, but it _barely_ did, resulting in the pureblood's perfectly round buttocks being really tempting, the very edge of them barely showing where the jacket had slipped up a little due to the accidental rubbing on the bed coverlet as they moved.

_Oh… uhm. No good. _Zero made sure to quickly sit opposite to the pureblood and not stare over Kaname's head too much, hoping that from that angle at least it would be less tempting.

He was also rather glad that he had zipped his pants earlier. He was currently having to hunch forward so that his sweater would cover his crotch and not reveal that he was hard again just from seeing the pureblood in that inviting position.

He'd wanted to put his jacket on the pureblood earlier not only because he thought Kaname might be cold being always naked, but also for a great part because he hoped that it would make resisting temptation easier.

But ironically, the fact that most of what Zero wanted to see was covered made him hyper-aware of it, his gaze instinctively straying to what he could see of the pureblood's bare skin, trying to see more. Not to mention that the idea that Kaname was completely naked, inside his jacket… well, he'd better start focusing on chess a lot if he wanted to be able to stop staring.

The last thing he'd want was to make Kaname think he wanted to do to him what all those other people wanted to…

_Well, wait, he __**did**__ want to. But not like that! _

He wanted to bed the pureblood, yes, but only _if_ he believed that Kaname wanted the same also. He would _not_ force him like the others did. Kaname may be a vampire and all that, but Zero refused to think of him as an object to use at will to satisfy bodily desires. Not even beasts deserved such a fate, so even if the vampire visibly aching in front of him had really been a beast rather than a person, Zero would still think the rapes were disgusting. And as it was, it was far too late for him to view Kaname as an object or probably anything other than a person.

Zero was trying to remember when was the last time he played chess, as he set the pieces on the board. Something looked kind of off, but he couldn't pinpoint what it was. Kaname was shooting desolated glances at the board, but not daring to say anything, which confirmed the hunter's impression.

"I put something wrong, didn't I? Can you fix it?"

The pureblood seemed to breathe in relief and quickly switched the bishops and knights, which Zero had set in the wrong places. Kaname had been burning to switch them from the very instant the hunter had put them wrong, but had been wary of saying something and getting in trouble.

As it was, he was torn between the delight of seeing the board in front of him and being about to play and… the fact that he was pretty sure that a slave trashing his opponent in a few moves would have tragic consequences.

If this was any other customer –not that any of them would have played chess with him, of course, but hypothetically speaking—he knew well that he would have had no choice but play it on the defensive and let them win, hopefully making mistakes that wouldn't seem too blatant, to avoid offending them by making it obvious that he was losing on purpose. Hunters liked to believe they were superior to the vampires in all things –which was completely untrue, simply speaking of the gifts nature had given each race—so performing well at anything but the sexual service that vampires were forced into would have been asking for trouble.

_  
But __**this**__ hunter was different, right? Or he faked it very well, in any case._ So maybe it would be okay to end the game in a draw or even…

The pureblood laid his face on his forearms crossed in front of himself, and eyed the board through wistful eyes, wishing he could truly play as he pleased, without holding back in the least. His thoughts were interrupted by the hunter's voice.

"Black or white?"

The black pieces were already on his side, so Kaname just left things as they were and replied "Black, please."

"Kaname… I don't know if you've thought of that or not, but please don't hold back. I figure you're considerably better at chess than me, but I wouldn't want you to tone it down for any reason. I like better playing fair and don't mind at all if you win."

Once more, the pureblood was absolutely surprised by the man. It was as if Zero somehow always knew what he was afraid of, or at least always knew the right thing to say to wash away his fears. Kaname's face colored slightly and he couldn't hold the delighted smile that took over his features as he whispered a promise. "I will play seriously then."

Zero felt something strange inside himself at the sight of the pureblood's innocent happiness. Something like an urge to ensure that this smile wouldn't die away, a feeling that he couldn't explain to himself but that felt very strong and warm inside… and very similar to the protective urges that made him stroke the pureblood's hair when Kaname had been so lost earlier.

.

28 minutes later, white had completely massacred black and the two were staring at the board with different levels of disbelief.

Zero was staring at Kaname's fallen black king laying on its side. The hunter was still awed that he'd won so thoroughly. It was common knowledge --in the post-war world, that is-- that all the great chess players of the past had been vampires, passing themselves for humans to live among the human society, which made that chess in a competitive level had nearly died as those people were killed or captured with the war. Vampires simply had a natural ability for chess and other strategy games, something perhaps born of their greatly analytical minds and heightened intelligence. Zero had expected that a pureblood especially, would completely crush him in a match, especially since he hadn't played in a few years himself. He was very surprised to have won, and if not for the sincere smile that Kaname had had when he promised to play seriously, Zero would be convinced that the pureblood had thrown the game.

Kaname was completely taken aback, staring at the board with utter mortification and flushed embarrassment. He was used to all sorts of shame, but this was a different and vaguely strange type. Considerably less bad than the much more real and painful shame he felt when his tormentors humiliated him, there was no doubt about that, but… he still couldn't believe he'd been defeated so thoroughly. _By a human no less!!_  
It had been a difficult match with many losses on both sides as they were both rusty, but even then it was still as if the hunter was always a move ahead of him. Kaname was still somewhat in shock that he hadn't seen the obvious trap of the bishop farther away on the board when Zero had drawn the pureblood's king out and then checkmated him. Kaname had practically turned lividly pale with disbelief when it happened and then red with shame the moment he'd tumbled his own king to the side to indicate he accepted his defeat.

Sure, he'd only ever played chess as a child, mostly against his father, Haruka, who wasn't exactly a specialist at it himself –Juri was much better, but rarely ever felt like playing--, but… Kaname had loved chess deeply enough that he'd hoped he was somewhat good at it, back then.

But now, the ten years spent in captivity had felt more like hundreds of years, and had had a heavy enough psychological impact on him that for far too long his mind had shut off way too much of certain things, the things that he didn't think he could ever have a chance at anymore.

He could barely remember the basic rules to play, and strategy was straight out of the window. He was horrified at how rusty he'd gotten.

Zero was starting to feel guilty for just how shocked the pureblood looked –although he had to admit it was kind of funny, in a cute way—and was getting tempted to ask if he was okay, when Kaname spoke again, in a wavering and hesitant voice.

"Would… Would it be okay if we played again? I think… I really need some practice."

The way those dark garnet eyes looked when the pureblood raised his head, his cheeks still slightly flushed with embarrassment… it was mesmerizing. Zero could only smile and nod eagerly.

They spent the next few hours talking of random things as they played game after game. Kaname was less tragically shocked by the next losses, because he'd scored a few victories against Zero as well –although he suspected the hunter had thrown the game in his first defeat, because Zero had been on a winning spree and Kaname's morale had been dropping visibly.  
The pureblood was somewhat annoyed by the idea, but he was also perplexed that the hunter would bother at all with trying to cheer him up. Rather than feeling irritated by the undue victory, the shame of failing so badly fueled Kaname's urge to do better than that, and he managed to finally properly beat the hunter a little later. He'd been instinctively worried at first, but Zero had been supportive and fair-play about it, another thing that touched the pureblood more than he'd have expected. A rush of unexpected warmth filled Kaname's heart and his fingers tightened automatically around the knight he'd used to checkmate Zero's king, in an innocent pride that he hadn't felt in more than ten years.

It was such a strange feeling to watch the time passing without anything terrible happening, without having to jump with fear at the slightest sound of footsteps outside, the succession of customers coming one after the other, barely leaving him enough time to change the sheets and clean up in between each, his body more and more worn out as exhaustion took over him and the various aches and bruises multiplied and made things more and more difficult with each newcomer…

Or even, it was so strange to simply be able to have a conversation with someone, play a game, talk of random things… Things that humans took for granted and enjoyed freely, and that were completely impossible for a vampire in the current world.

Even talking at all just simply felt so weird. Kaname had lived in slavery so long that sometimes he'd whisper to himself in the dark, afraid of forgetting the sound of his own voice, or how to speak. Now, it felt so weird to hear himself so often. He was nowhere as eloquent as he'd been in the past when he was free, and he hated every single time he paused awkwardly to search for a word or because speech patterns came slightly jumbled. But the gentle reassuring smile of the hunter made everything all better, and the times that Kaname's gaze strayed to Zero's warm amethyst eyes or his soft-looking lips, the pureblood nearly forgot what he was saying altogether, lost in the urge to drown in that smile and never come back out of it to face the harsh reality of the world.

They were too engrossed in each other to see the time passing, but after a while Zero finally noticed and decided that if he wanted to have any chances to make it back home on time to get some much needed hours of sleep before getting up for work, he'd better leave soon.

His need to leave broke a little the spell of the moment, bringing back the reality of the fact that he wouldn't be there always, and throwing a shroud of sadness over the pureblood. Kaname concealed it to his best, but he was less talkative, and his eyes lost themselves on the ground more now, instead of stealing glances at the hunter as he'd been doing before. The rational side of the pureblood was reminding him harshly of how foolish it was to bask in the other's presence, when it was but an illusory solace that couldn't possibly be sincere regardless of the appearances. Kaname knew well that when the other finally did break the mask, his heart would shatter, but he was too hurt to not cling to the moment at hand, ever lost in this battle between reason and raw need, between knowing that it could not possibly last, and desperately yearning for even a tiny little moment of respite from the daily horror he lived in.

Against his best judgment, the pureblood couldn't stop the words coming out of his lips when the hunter got up.

"When will you be back?"

He didn't want to ask it, because it was an admission that he _wanted_ the hunter to come back, and even just such a simple idea was already giving so much power to the other by letting him know that the pureblood was getting more dependent of his presence, despite all his attempts to distance himself.

But if the hunter had thought of it that way, he betrayed no such thing on his face when he smiled at the pureblood.  
Zero had a hunting/searching mission out of the city the next day, but it was just a routine one, and he was sure he would be back on time to drop by the opening hours of the 'house'. They would be hunting for survivors of the war hiding in the wilderness, usually level E's who'd somehow escaped previous searches. But those missions most often went by without any enemies being found anyway, so it would probably be an easy job and be done fast.  
Originally, he'd planned to give Kaname the chess set at his return, but he brought it along when he decided to visit tonight. He wasn't about to mention his work as a hunter though, so he didn't say anything of the mission and merely caressed the other's face softly, replying "I'll be back tomorrow at the opening without fault."

The gesture had been instinctive, and it slightly surprised the two of them. And as Zero walked to the door, strategically looking away to avoid being tempted when the pureblood took off the jacket to hand it back to him, this time it was Kaname who whispered "Take care…"

Zero chuckled, turning to meet Kaname's hesitant gaze, and raising a hand to his face, fingers brushing softly the pureblood's parted lips.

"You too…"

The door clicked softly, and Zero walked away, leaving Kaname with the feeling of the hunter's touch still lingering on his lips. He stared at the wood, sighing softly, in part wistfully wishing for more and in part angry at himself for having failed to keep his distance from the other.

He walked away from the door and let himself fall on his back on the bed, inhaling deeply the hunter's scent on the sheets. He didn't have to hurry as much since he wouldn't need to shower before the next customer –that too, was such a strange feeling… normally he had to run to have time to do it all, especially during rush hour when they sent people in at shorter intervals. The hunter had stayed long enough that it was now much later in the night, when the flow of customers lessened, although the pureblood still had a few hours ahead to endure as there were always latecomers, and his popularity made that it was unlikely those would go for another slave if he was free. If no one came, they'd put him in the display again, to attract anyone still passing in the street until the time the house closed and he was finally allowed to sleep, until the next evening.

Normally, once the night was over a slave would just sleep on the last sheets used, while the others were washed, but Kaname was secretly planning to put the sheets with Zero's scent aside from the others and switch them with the last set of the night, to be able to sleep on them once the night was finally over, instead of just leaving them in the pile to wash for the next evening. He knew it was stupid to let himself so open to hurt by allowing himself to depend on the other for comfort, but at least the hunter wouldn't see what he was doing and have yet another edge on him. He could always try and distance himself the next time… or at least, that's what he told himself he _must_ try.

As he got up to change the sheets, something small bounced off the bed and fell on the ground, rolling away. With horror, Kaname went after it, recognizing a chess piece that had been forgotten behind when Zero had put everything away to take the board back with him.

It was the white knight that Kaname had used to checkmate Zero in his first truly earned victory. They had switched around back and forth and Kaname had been playing with the white pieces through part of the night.

Kaname looked at it up close, a bittersweet feeling spreading in his heart, making him unsure whether it was pain or pleasure that he felt when he looked at the little sculpted piece of marble in his hand. The same feeling he felt when he looked at Zero, and in a way, the hunter reminded him of that chess piece… pale skin crowned by hair that looked grey from afar and was almost silver when you saw it up close in the light, much like the knight crafted of beautiful white marble, streaked with grey and mottled with some other stone that shone softly in the light and reminded the pureblood of the hunter's gentle amethyst eyes.

Kaname felt his throat tightening, and he unconsciously brought the knight up to his mouth and placed his lips on the cold surface of it before he'd noticed what he was doing.

Tomorrow, he'd attempt to be cold and distant. _Yeah, like you'd be able to do it…_ He shook the doubt away and told himself that he would try his very best.

He wrapped the chess piece inside the sheets he was going to put aside, and hid it all in the corner behind the door of the little laundry space in the wall, before quickly making the bed with new sheets and sitting on a corner of it to wait for a handler to come and send in the next man.

Now that he was ready and waiting on a cold bed, there was a strange ominous feeling in the air, of which he couldn't quite pinpoint the source.

His gums were still hurting from the fang removal and he licked them nervously while he waited. It was easier to ignore the physical pain while Zero's company had been occupying his mind and keeping him busy. Now that the hunter was gone, the exhaustion and the pain were making themselves more noticeable.  
But Kaname could tell that strangely this wasn't at all what was causing that worry. It was a weird feeling in his blood, something intangible and vague letting him know that something bad would happen, but not precise enough to say what, leaving him particularly tense, worry churning in his gut.

Something in his instincts told him it was related to Zero though.

Inevitably, he feared it meant the hunter would finally betray him soon, and that thought sent spikes of pain straight through his heart. He wasn't left enough time to worry about it in the immediate though, because the door opened and he had to stand quickly, glancing at the bed in worry to see if he'd left creases on where he was sitting.

.

.

.

[tbc]

* * *

_Cliffhanger? XD; *lol*_

_The chapter title this time is a chunk of a line from the song "Play dead" by HIM. :D  
I chose this line in reference to Kaname's decision to try and shut his heart completely from Zero, by fear that otherwise he'll get hurt more. (Decision he took in the previous chapter, but that he meant to implement in this one…and failed. (Well, he still intends to try again next time XD;)  
_

_And unrelatedly: AAAHh, the chapters keep getting longer!! XD;;; *tries to make it a bit shorter* (This fic has already hit the required size to be considered a novel. XD;; *lol*)_

_The next chapter will probably be up next week-end… unless my Muses go crazy and it ends up getting ready by Wednesday... *is never sure* XD;;_

_._

_**NOTE: **__**If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK,** it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
__Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweeter Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety.  
__**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks__ in the manga (yes, that Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out if__ instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and __was completely traumatized by years of abuse and slavery__. (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	11. Will you let me tear your heart apart?

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 11- "Will you let me tear your heart apart?" **_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_The previous chapter was more fluff, this one is a bit of a roller coaster by moments, but it's a necessary thing for the progression of the plot. ;) Changes are never smooth or easy, especially when it's changing something so deeply ingrained..._

_Again thank you so much to __all the wonderful people who have been writing such lovely reviews~! ^_^/  
Hearing from you and knowing what you think of the different things in the fic always gets me all re-energized and motivated to write!! :D _

* * *

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As a general rule, the more you thought that something would be easy and perfectly devoid of trouble, the more you were tempting fate to throw at you whatever it had in stock that day.

Zero and two other young hunters left the Hunter Association headquarters exchanging light-hearted banter and assuming that the routine mission would be over quickly and easily, and that they'd be back early and bored from not finding any of the vampires they were supposed to look for in the abandoned areas outside the city.

There were many inhabited areas in the surroundings of the capital and in neighboring cities, and hunting/searching missions were common.  
Vampires that had survived the war and managed to evade captivity for so many years, on the other hand, were far less common. As such, those missions usually ended with the hunters returning empty handed.

Before the war, vampires and humans often lived together, even though the humans weren't aware of that then. Now the textbooks would say that all vampires that had chosen to live among the humans back then had done so to prey on them –which wasn't entirely untrue in various cases—but before the war, they didn't even know those vampires were there, simply because other than level E's, most vampires did all they could to remain undiscovered and not attract unwanted attention.  
With the war, naturally that wasn't possible anymore, and there were massive population shifts –for the ones who did shift on time, that is. Cases of vampire families leaving too late and being lynched by the mobs of humans with torches and stakes were far from having been uncommon.

All in all, once the war was over and the humans had regained full control of all the various territories, there were many areas left in ruin and abandoned as the hunter cities developed and grew more and more.

Those abandoned areas, many in ruins and many pillaged during the war like the great mansions of the vampire aristocracy, were mostly left alone by the humans, except when they suspected that survivors of the war might be hiding in it.

Most often it was level D's or even E's, as countless ex-humans had been used in the war. Occasionally you could find a straggled level C, but it was rare.  
Survivors from the higher ranks were inexistent out of captivity. The Hunter Association had surprisingly precise lists of names of the vampire aristocracy and purebloods, and all were accounted for, officially in any case.

Although the Association never did reveal how they came to be in the possession of such precise info, not only on the higher ranks of the enemy population in general but even on exactly where to find each of them during the war.  
The official story was that it was through their extensive spying on the enemy. But regardless of what methods they may have used to get such surprisingly accurate info, the final results of it were obvious: the impressive precision and the deadly effectiveness with which the Hunter Association conducted business and won battle after battle during the war was one of the big things that helped convince the normal human population that the Association was fully reliable and was their most trustworthy ally in time of crisis and in the middle of the chaos of discovering not only that vampires actually existed but that there was a war going on with them.

With the way the war went, the panic of the civilian population overturning governments and institutions and creating a great big mess, it was no wonder that the Association came out of it so empowered, and that the masses turned to it for reorganizing the post-war world and taking care of everything.

The world of men had become the world of hunters, and there was no room for vampires in it, or at least no room other than chained to a bed in the abject slavery they were forced into before the war had even ended completely.

But while purebloods had long been very rare and the aristocracy was more numerous but still undeniably a minority, the population of level C's and D's on the other hand was quite large. The higher ranks had been captured for a great part thanks to ambushes with weaponized anti-vampire drugs and even the use of hostages and various other underhanded methods, but the lower ranks were more difficult to capture in their entirety, if anything simply due to their sheer numbers. The war did diminish considerably those numbers, of course, and the large scale sweeps done by the hunter armies finished to herd the survivors into captivity, but there were some who had managed to escape, however few they may be.

Those routine missions sweeping the abandoned areas were for catching those potential survivors. The hunters sent after them had orders to kill anyone found if they had no 'potential' –level E's, for example— or capture them and bring them back to the headquarters for enslaving if they were stable and presentable enough.

Ex-humans hidden in the wilderness or in the ruins were what was more likely to be found, either still rational or turned into level E's due to losing their mind to despair and bloodlust, isolated from prey and safe shelter.  
It was still somewhat common in the first years after the war; this too, had contributed to the Hunter Association's complete dominion over the new order of things in the post-war world, because the civilian population was too scared to even step out of the most populated areas, initially. They were completely terrified by the stories of haggard level E's wandering the ruins, starved, bones jutting out on their leathery pale skin post-fall, preying on whoever strayed from the safer and most civilized areas guarded by the hunters. The civilian population depended completely on them to ensure their security against such a menace, and the Association was happy to embrace the role of guide of the people, as well as judge, jury and executioner…

For several years, level C's and level D's had still been found easily, then killed or captured and reduced to slavery as well. Nowadays, on the other hand, while the hunters' reputation and control of society remained perfect, the numbers of enemies wandering in the wilderness and in the ruins outside the urban areas had decreased significantly, and most of those regular missions ended with no enemies found. What survivors were left knew better than remain where they might be found more easily, and were constantly on the move, trying their very best to stay out of the areas more likely to be searched, and doing what they could to just stay alive.

So Zero wasn't really out of the norm by assuming that this mission would probably end with no enemies found. After all, it was the most frequent outcome.

But when his two colleagues and he walked into an abandoned building in the deserted area of what used to be one of the old districts south-east of the capital before a great fire during the war, Zero finally got a bad feeling about this mission.

They'd felt a weak presence on the second floor, and separated to cover the different rooms in each corridor more efficiently. Zero progressed faster, and so he was a bit farther from the other two when he felt the presence of a vampire nearby. There was no time to go back and call the other two for back up without risking losing track of the prey, so he went in quickly, rushing across a room, a second corridor and then pushing open a door that revealed a room similar to all the ones they'd been searching, bare, grey from ashes and ten years of dust, tattered furnishings and broken remains of furniture that had survived the fire scattered as they were left… it was a familiar scenery for someone used to search the ruins, with the exception of one thing: unlike the previous rooms, this one had an inhabitant.

There was a vampire huddling in the corner opposite of the door, having ran out of an exit to run for, and curled up in a failed attempt to remain unseen. A hunter's senses wouldn't fail to notice the presence though, and Zero approached with his favorite gun, the _Bloody Rose,_ already pointed at the enemy and ready to fire.

Unlike the more extreme of his colleagues, who enjoyed every instant of the job and often went out of their way to make the prey's end last longer, Zero had always had a more moderate stance, preferring giving the enemy a merciful death and making it quick, not finding any reason to dish out unnecessary additional suffering.

The vampire –which by now Zero had identified as a female, a level D long turned level E, from the look of things-- was shivering lightly in a corner, rocking softly, hands over her face, bony thin knees drawn in front of her, mostly unmoving despite the fact that it couldn't possibly not have felt him approaching. She might have been too crazed by bloodlust to really think clearly, or too exhausted from hunger and deprivation.

The position she was huddled in looked so oddly vulnerable that it gave Zero a strange familiar impression, reminding him of someone else he'd seen badly wounded.

The level E, who'd been unmoving until now suddenly raised her head off her hands and stared straight at him, apparently terrified, probably knowing he was the very embodiment of walking death, for her.

Zero's gun was already level with the vampire's head and ready to fire, but when he looked into those reddened eyes –albeit red only because they were gleaming from bloodlust—peeking in between the vampire's matted dark hair… she looked so lost and miserable that he found himself unexpectedly thinking of Kaname, similarly curled up to protect himself, looking up at him with eyes filled with despair and utter hopelessness, and for the first time in Zero's career as a hunter, he hesitated instead of firing.

Hunters were taught from an early age that you never, _ever,_ hesitate. A fraction of a second is the margin between life and death for a hunter in duty. Vampires are considerably faster than humans, and while hunters are far superior to a normal human, it doesn't changes the fact that one must be extremely careful when hunting such a potentially lethal predator. With a level D, or even a level C, you _might_ maybe survive a moment of hesitation, _if_ you're very lucky. With anything above, you were sure to be dead meat before you could even blink.

And even though they were just hunting for levels C, D and E, they always went in groups precisely to avoid the human mistake factor, especially with younger and less experienced hunters.

Zero did have years of experience behind him, so the problem at hand wasn't caused by that, though. It was caused by a recent exterior influence… Until now, Zero had been repeatedly fooling himself into believing that it wouldn't affect him in the least in his work. In fact, he'd somehow managed to push himself to believe that learning more about vampires in general by interacting with Kaname in particular might make him a better hunter.

This might be true in theory, but the very real side effect the young hunter was facing now was certainly not negligible.

In the time it took for him to hesitate instead of pressing the trigger, a second level E, this time a male, visibly the mate of the other, sprung out of an adjacent walk-in closet and leapt for him with a growl. Zero spun towards it fast, but the beast had the time to slash him across the chest and shoulder with its dirty claws before the hunter could pump two bullets into it, one in the chest area and one in the head, as per standard hunter practice, wanting to ensure the shot really hit.  
The level E exploded into dust on the spot. Everything was moving in slow motion, for Zero. He realized now that the reason why the presence of the vampire had felt strange, much stronger before and then strangely muddled and weaker when he was near her was because it hadn't been a single one, but the weak one huddled up and a stronger one nearby, too close by to register as a separate presence until he saw him and realized. He'd killed the male, but the female was still staring at him, and Zero's hunter instincts were shocked to find that his first reaction to the situation was feeling guilty because he'd just killed one of the beasts right before the eyes of its mate.

It had all gone so fast. He'd expected the female to wail in sorrow, weep for her mate or something, but she didn't even seem to register the ashes still falling on the ground, apparently ignoring the other's death completely and merely hissing as she jumped on her feet and went for Zero.

Even now as she leapt for him, Zero couldn't help staring at the contrasting dark hair and pale skin, red eyes now filled with even more hunger than before.

Two shots rang from a gun other than the Bloody Rose, and the female exploded in a cloud of grayish dust as well, showering Zero with its ashes and the blood that spurted out before her body shattered.

The other two young hunters had been on their way there already, and had been alerted by the previous shots, rushing for it. They were now standing in the doorframe, staring at Zero, one of them holding a gun with the barrel still smoking.

"What the hell were you doing, Zero??"

"I swear, you were staring at it!! Have a death wish, much?"

By now, Zero had completely shaken out of his momentary stupor, and was rather flustered by his colleagues' remarks, as much as he was by his own reactions during the whole situation. He had a colossal urge to kick himself. _If master Yagari had seen this, he'd never let me hear the end of it._

Luckily not even the other two young hunters had really seen the whole thing, so they didn't know what caused him to get wounded in the first place.

Zero rebuked them while still feeling rather stupid, and they simply assumed that he'd just entered the room, focused on one vampire and had failed to sense the second one until it was too late. In a way, they were right, except that they didn't know about Zero's hesitation having caused the whole problem. From their point of view, they thought he was slow to shoot the female because he was still in pain from the wound immediately after killing the male or something. If it was either of them, it might have been that --Zero was the fastest of the three and recouped in less time as well.  
At least, that meant that they wouldn't be spreading stupid stories about him with the others at the headquarters.

If they made it back, that was. They were still all alone in the middle of nowhere, with no back-up and with one of them now bleeding, offering a hard-to-resist beacon for every starved level E in the ruins. The creatures may fear hunters more than death itself, but they were starved and desperate, and fresh blood spilt was very difficult to resist.

"We have to get the hell out of here, like _now_. You're bleeding like a stuck pig."

"I am not!"

"Still, he's right, all the bloodsuckers will rush here!!"

Most hunters around Zero's age had less field experience than him, and thus, the two were more prone to worry about things than he was, despite the fact that he was the one bleeding there –albeit nowhere as much as his young colleague claimed. The wound wasn't very deep, and would hardly endanger his fighting abilities.

In part, this gap in the experience was due to the fact that Zero's master was the very best, and extremely demanding, but in part it was also because Zero had started much earlier because of his parents' death and his urge to take care of Ichiru.

Yagari would have been there for them anyway, but Zero felt compelled to put all his energy into training harder than anyone, and ended up being admitted into the active-duty roll sooner than most hunters his age. That resulted in him having already three years of field experience while his two colleagues were still early on in their second year.

For a while, Yagari still accompanied him in missions, but soon even the over-protective master was forced to admit that Zero was one of the best of his generation, and could fend for himself without trouble.

So Zero was more aware of the real level of danger of this area, which led him to take a decision. "No way. We're not leaving yet."

Of course, it wasn't exactly a very pleasant idea in the eyes of the other two. One of them stared with his mouth agape while the other protested loudly.

"Pardon me?? Are you out of your mind Kiryuu?"

But Zero was rather determined when he'd decided something. "You said it yourself, my bleeding will attract them better than anything. It's an occasion we can't miss. Normally we rarely ever find them, and this time, they'll come straight for us!"

_The most crazed and needy of them, at least._

"Yeah, that's precisely why we should _maybe_ get the hell out of here before they jump us, no?!"

But the protests died off when the man's eyes met Zero's; the silver haired hunter's gaze was cold enough to chill his colleague to the bone when he glared at him. Zero's words finished putting an end to the discussion.

"Well, _maybe_ you're afraid of doing your job, but I'm not. If you can't take a fight, just stay back and give me cover fire!"

He didn't bother saying anymore than that, and simply stepped out, blood seeping into his shirt and flooding the air in its unmistakable scent with each of the hunter's movements.

Maybe Zero wanted to prove something to his colleagues. Or maybe it was to himself that he needed to prove something, about how open he'd left himself fror Kaname.

But if it was the latter, then the attempt was a failure, because each and every single level E that threw itself at him and that he shot down awakened the same disturbing images of guilt and doubt, memories of the pureblood at the 'house' mixing with the present at hand and disturbing him in the hunt. Zero was efficiency incarnate, shooting the enemies down before they even got the slightest chance to approach him, but he was less fast than he normally was, and each time he'd cringe before pulling the trigger. Not visibly enough that the other two following in tow would realize, but bad enough that he was seriously uncomfortable. Not that the wound and the whole confusing situation didn't already make things bad enough.

By the time whatever starved vampires that may be still hiding in the vicinity realized what was going on and ran away, knowing that approaching within range of being sensed by the hunters was a bad idea, the young trio had mowed down seven of them, all level E --although one might have been a starved level D close to turning.

To be more exact, Zero had downed four and his two colleagues had taken the rest. They could hardly be blamed seeing how he didn't really leave them the time to engage the enemies before he shot them down.

The three hunters were weary and covered in ashes and dirt from their victims as well as from the abandoned buildings. By the time they finally left to return to the capital, it was far past the hour they'd originally expected to be back by already, and far past the time Zero had had in mind when he told Kaname he'd be visiting without fault at the opening hour of the 'house'.

--

Meanwhile, Kaname had spent the day lost in inevitable worry.

He'd spent the hours he was allowed to rest prior to a new night of work tossing in bed without being able to get any real sleep, worrying and thinking.

He knew well that if he just kept falling prey of impossible hopes, then sooner or later his heart would be desperately lost and he'd become weak enough that he would have nothing left… not even enough strength to hide his last secrets from Ichiou.

So he simply had no choice but to endure and distance himself from this ridiculous hope, this impossible little momentary happiness that he so cherished.

He knew it himself, just how impossible it was. He knew there was no way the hunter was possibly doing anything other than playing with him, and from past experience he suspected it wouldn't last much longer.

The problem was, Kaname didn't know if he still had the strength to close his heart from Zero.

Life was full of masks. The mask of fake submission that he wore for the 'house' employees and all its customers, so that he could survive each day without suffering even more than he already did. The mask of cold and uncaring dismissal that he wore whenever Aidou looked dangerously close to getting in trouble by trying to talk to him or something. The mask he wore to make Ichiou think he still had enough resistance in himself, so that the old bastard wouldn't know he'd long succeeded in breaking him completely, so that he'd never find out that there was a much more simple and tragic reason why Kaname couldn't and wouldn't turn Takuma.

And now, he'd have to wear a new mask of control and distance, hiding behind cold and indifference to block away the warmth he so desperately needed, that came from the gentle attentions of the kind silver-haired hunter.

This was the most difficult part, the one that was actually based on a conscious decision and so difficult to enforce on his far too desperate and far too foolish heart, with its tendency to cling to the tiniest crumbs of solace he could get a hold of.

But there was also something else haunting his mind today, something less precise and closer to a gut-feeling, that kept refusing to leave the pureblood alone, a vague feeling of worry and unease when he thought of Zero.

It had started the previous evening as the hunter got ready to leave, and just wouldn't disappear.

In part, it further fueled Kaname's fear that Zero might drop the act anytime soon.

Of course, Kaname didn't know that there was a reason for that feeling and it was not an imminent betrayal from Zero. But the pureblood had no way of knowing what was causing it, since he'd never experienced this feeling, or at least, he had never experienced it in quite the same way…

That intangible feeling of danger kept worrying him, but he couldn't tell what could be causing it. It wasn't quite present at all times, and it was far too vague for him to get a good guess as to what it meant, but he was far too used to being terribly hurt to disregard such hunches.  
And the fact that it kept making him think of the hunter only enhanced his automatic fear that it was a way his body instinctually found to tell him that the hunter would betray him soon.

Kaname had been torn from his family at far too early an age and hadn't gotten to grow up among purebloods, so he lacked knowledge on many things that would be natural to him if he had grown up normally, like those tiny latent side effects of the powers he couldn't use due to the anti-vampire drugs constantly clouding his blood and mind. But even though he didn't know where the vague feeling came from, he still knew better than ignoring it. The simple possibility that he might be right and Zero might be about to put an end to this game that still perplexed the pureblood was such a frightening thought that it couldn't possibly be shrugged off.

Ten years ago, when Kaname's whole world had come apart in that snowy night when his parents died, the young pureblood had felt something similar, but it was all jumbled together in the middle of the chaos of the battle. And with Yuuki becoming human and him having to fight off the level E hordes to save her, and then the horror that followed with Rido and Ichiou arriving, Kaname couldn't have known that part of the intense dread he'd felt all along that night worked in a very similar way to what he was feeling now, although the current one came in a much smaller scale, perhaps making it extra hard to identify as being something of the same nature than the instinctive sensation he'd felt that night years ago.

The instinctive reaction back then had been caused by the way his blood could tell that doom was coming for Haruka and Juri.  
As a baby, Kaname had fed on their energy as any little vampire did with his/her parents, much like how a human child would feed on their mother's milk.  
Then, as he weaned and his fangs grew out, as any child growing up the little pureblood had fed on his parents' blood. It was natural, not only to fulfill a vampire's nutritional needs as they developed, but also as a normal way of bonding between parents and children. The parents' blood mixed within their child, becoming a close part of him.  
As a side-effect, in children of powerful blood some vague foreseeing instincts would manifest, as a way evolution had to let the young know if their parents were in danger. In long gone times, this would have enabled them to be safer, possibly giving a few extra moments to escape before an attacker made their way to the children after their parents. It was similar to the way actual blood bonds worked, creating an additional awareness of the person one was linked to, although between parents and children it didn't work the way it worked between bonded lovers, naturally.  
This type of instinct was particularly useful for purebloods, which were so desired that they were much more likely to be preyed upon when still small and defenseless, or when wounded and vulnerable, in a time long before there were laws to protect their blood. Although in the new post-war world, Kaname had no one left to guide him and explain that this was a normal instinct due to having drank the blood of someone he felt a connection with.

The pureblood had only tasted Zero's blood once, and Zero was not a vampire, but he was a hunter of powerful blood, and hunters had a little bit of vampire genes in them from the early beginnings when they had fed on pureblood flesh to gain power.  
Because Kaname's abilities were so dulled by the anti-vampire drugs, he could barely feel the tug of foreseeing in his blood, trying to let him know that the strange unease he was feeling wasn't a danger to himself, but to the one whose blood he'd drank. But since he didn't know what was happening or what he was feeling and why, the constant thoughts of Zero made him afraid for himself rather than for the hunter, since it seemed that of them two he was the one most likely to be in danger, not Zero.

He didn't get the same foreseeing for the lower rank vampires whose blood he was given when the 'house' needed him to heal from particularly bad wounds, but that might be because there was no actual connection between him and them, and their blood was far too weak to react with his pureblood abilities, terribly dulled as they may be. Zero's blood was strong even for a hunter, and there was an undeniable connection between the pureblood and him, regardless of the fact that Kaname was so intent on denying that link to himself, afraid of what the dependency would inevitably cause.

Vague and barely noticeable as the feeling may be due to the pureblood's abilities being so weakened by the drugs, it was constantly in the background, like an itch that wouldn't go away, and it got suddenly significantly stronger at one point. Kaname was being taken to the display window at that time, and stumbled in surprise, which earned him a violent shove from a handler. It would probably have been worse if not for the fact that they'd thought it was because his hips were still hurting and giving him difficulties, else they'd have assumed it was disobedience, which would have been severely punished.

He sat shackled to his chair, staring outside with a vaguely dazed look, wondering why the weird foreboding had practically disappeared after hitting its peak. Although he could surmise from that and the fact that the hunter didn't show up that it had to do with something that might have happened to him, and the idea filled him with a renewed fear and despair, now not only for himself but for the hunter, which was a strange and novel feeling.

From the corner of his eyes, Aidou stole glances at him, worried to see the pureblood looking agitated, although the blond was having trouble concentrating himself, having had his regular shots recently and feeling completely wiped out.

Soon the 'house' opened its doors for the evening and they were separated, each taken away for a different customer.

Kaname wasn't surprised to see that Zero was nowhere in sight, but the pain of the dashed hopes still hit him just as hard, and he had to lower his head more than usual to hide his eyes, not wanting his customer to mistake the reason for his disappointment and take that as an additional excuse to torment him.

--

Zero did finally appear, but only a long while later, by the time Kaname wasn't even expecting him to come today anymore.

The pureblood had had a rather rough early evening, and was having more trouble standing than before, courtesy of the brutality of an early customer on his still-healing joints. He was functioning more or less on automatic, the way he usually was by the end of the night, which wasn't very reassuring considering that there were still so many hours to endure ahead before the night was over and he could collapse.

Normally, whenever Zero came in, there was an awkward moment where the pureblood never quite knew what to say, but today things happened differently, because the very instant Zero stepped on the corridor of the rooms, Kaname smelled his blood, so by the time the door opened the pureblood was already expecting him and rather worried.

The moment the hunter stepped in, Kaname couldn't help blurting out a concerned "Kiryuu-sama! You are hurt..."

He could tell it was a minor wound, non-threatening and probably already taken care of and bandaged, considering that the smell of blood was faint and mixed with that of medication and fresh cloth, and that the hunter had visibly already showered and changed into clean clothes as well.  
Kaname was far too used to being the one hurt, but until now he hadn't even considered Zero being wounded, despite the other's occupation.

He reached for the hunter out of an instinctive worry for him that he couldn't explain even to himself, perhaps a mirror of how much the man had helped him when he was the one hurt. He knew pain well, and he hated every instant of it; he felt a tightening in his chest at the idea of the gentle hunter being in pain, as if such a thing was unfathomable and horrible.

The hunter's reaction however, was completely not what Kaname was expecting, due to how far it was from what the pureblood had grown used to see from him.

Zero was still shaken by the events of that day, and deeply troubled by the idea that he'd been endangering himself and his capacities as a hunter by leaving himself open to a vampire, _this_ vampire more exactly. It all jumbled together in his mind with the hunt earlier, and when the pureblood reached forward, the hunter didn't see the wounded slave he'd chosen to make his favorite to protect, but merely a vampire, a harmful and potentially dangerous creature, if not physically then due to his pernicious influence.

He instinctively shoved Kaname back, perhaps more roughly than he meant, blurting out a sudden "That's none of your business, vampire!!"

There was a strange fire in his eyes, born of distrust and worry mixed with uncertainty and even pain from the wound in his shoulder, that wasn't grave but still hurt all the same. When their eyes met, the pureblood's widened in shock, finding a hostility in the other's gaze that he'd never seen in _this_ hunter before.

He'd nearly fallen when Zero pushed him back, not having expected it, but he managed to catch himself on time, gritting his teeth from the pain that shot through his hips with the movement.

Zero didn't know what he'd done just now, but unwittingly he'd snapped shut the barriers that had started to open to him more and more, and Kaname swiftly backed away a few steps, instincts born of years of abuse and rape screaming to all his senses that he needed to put some distance as fast as possible between himself and the person likely to hit him. Not that he had a chance to escape a customer or anything they wanted to do to him, but the little distance between them helped deal with the fear a little bit better for now.

The pureblood's heart was rushing, beating an erratic tattoo that echoed in his own ears, courtesy of the blood speeding in his veins. But he dug his nails into his palms and forced himself to put on a knowing smile, one that might have looked seductive if it wasn't so forced.

_I see the game has moved to the next stage?_

He was torn between how terrified he was of what would inevitably follow, and how angry he also felt to see that he'd been right all along. Truth to be said, he found himself amazed that he even _could_ still feel angry after so many years of horror. It might mean that there was yet a part of him that wasn't completely broken, perhaps. Or maybe it was yet another side effect of Zero, since he always caused the unexpected around him. Usually, the pureblood didn't have the _energy_ to be angry, too busy trying to survive, to stay alive, to not break apart completely, mentally or physically.

But as he looked at Zero, seeing the sparks of distrust and hostility in the hunter's eyes, the pureblood couldn't help the surge of anger he felt in his body, at everything that he'd held so dear and turned out to be nothing but a lie, just as he feared all along, just as he expected all along. Perhaps he should have known better than have allowed the foolish spark of hope that it just _might _not be a lie… but he'd tried to fight it so much and failed each time due to how desperate and lost he was...

Of course, he had no idea of what was motivating Zero's sudden hostile façade, nor did he know that the hunter was both worried and unsure himself.  
After all Kaname had suffered, and how often people had deceived and betrayed him, he could hardly be blamed for expecting the worse, especially when the hunter was unwittingly falling right into a dreadful pattern that the pureblood had seen more than once before, one that he remembered didn't end well at all, at least not for himself.

They eyed each other for some moments, neither knowing what to say to break the silence that grew increasingly uncomfortable, so hostile and so unlike the awkward but well intentioned moments of silence of their previous meetings.

Finally, Zero spoke, in a guarded and cold tone.

"There's something I've been curious about for a while…"

Kaname studied him from the corner of his eyes, straying farther from him and closer to the bed, and Zero continued.

"A pureblood should normally be up to a hundred times more expensive than the price I pay for you each time I come here. I shouldn't even be able to pay for visiting you this often."

Kaname's face went livid. Zero missed seeing that and pushed on. "Why are they renting you for the price of a much lower rank…?"

The hunter had been thinking that it was rather fishy for a while, but he had never asked. Now however, anything out of the normal fueled his paranoia about the vampire, and he had less scruples at the moment when it came to asking questions.

The pureblood ran a weary hand over his face and sighed, a tired and forced laugh coming from the twisted smile on his lips, a ragged smile that looked born out of desperation rather than anything real.

_It's all because of Ichiou and his sick games…_

"It's… a long story."

_It's because the sick bastard wants anyone to be able to afford me, and enjoys knowing that there are crowds of them coming here all night long and not leaving me an instant of respite…_

"…much too long."

_And one I don't want to tell. One I certainly will never tell anyone, much less you._

The reluctance was obvious on Kaname's whole body language, especially his gaze.

Zero didn't see things that way though, or at least not at the present moment. He crossed his arms and kept his gaze hard, commanding the vampire much more like one did to a slave, so unlike the way he'd treated him the previous times. "We have time. Start talking, vampire."

Those were not the words Kaname was expecting. Maybe because they were so far from the gentleness that Zero had displayed in his previous visits. The hunter himself had been a bit surprised the moment he spoke, finding his voice harsher than he meant for it to be.  
But he'd be more shocked yet by Kaname's reaction. The pureblood's gaze hardened suddenly, his jaw set and his entire stance shifting into one of discomfort and visible reluctance, strongly determined.

A part of Kaname felt stupidly selfish. Thanks to this hunter, he'd been given some wonderful moments of peace that no one had bothered to offer him with such a genuine feel until now… He'd feared all along, telling himself it could only be a lie, but… even knowing it had to be a fake gentleness, it was a pleasant lie to cling to while it lasted.  
_And yet, now that he lost that, all he could do was react so badly at the loss instead of being glad for what little solace he'd gotten while it still lasted… _

Depressing as this way of seeing things may be, for someone like him, who was only given brutality and pain on a daily basis, every tiny little bit of comfort counted. He'd grown used to expecting nothing but violence from the hunters, to the point that he felt indebted if someone unexpectedly treated him as something other than a sexual object. He couldn't help feeling a vague and unexplainable guilt for feeling angry at Zero for merely doing what all hunters did, albeit a while later.

But it wasn't truly to the loss that he was reacting, but to the certainty that in the moments that followed, Zero would undo all that he'd done for him so far. And considering that his very last hopes were shattering to pieces, he could hardly be blamed for his anger, regardless of how gentle this hunter may have been to him before.

Zero didn't know where the impression came from, but he had the feeling that a huge barrier had set itself between them all of a sudden. An impression that only worsened when Kaname finally replied to his question, if one could consider that a reply.

"You can pry the truth from my dead lips. If you're able to, that is."

Zero stared at him, almost not believing what the vampire had just said.

Simply speaking of the rules standing between hunters and vampires in the current society, such defiant words were completely inconceivable. Vampires weren't even allowed to speak without permission. And even with it, the range of what they were allowed to say was severely limited. They were to answer questions and speak only the bare minimum, weren't allowed to use the word 'no' or refuse anything, and as for speaking to anyone, much less a hunter, in such a tone… suffice to say that no one wanted to make their situation far worse by pointlessly angering people who held such power over their lives.

After so many years living that way, the vampires had been forced to accept that hate it as they may, it was the way things worked now –they knew far too well the horrors they'd endure if they broke the hunter's rules. But they weren't the only ones who'd come to accept the present status quo as inevitable – the hunters too had grown to find the way things were to be the norm, and seeing a vampire openly refuse and order was so much more shocking now than it would have been shortly after the war –although the inevitable resulting beating might not differ much from back then.

Faced with Kaname's unexpected defiance and still shaken by the events of the afternoon, Zero was reacting much more like a normal hunter would, instead of in the way he'd been behaving lately. Unknowingly, the distrust born of the earlier incident was making him fall into patterns of thinking of the current vampire-hating society rather than the more open approach he'd been using lately, born of his belief that such things might be unfair. The hunt earlier and the current confrontation were threatening the very basis of the entire idealistic vision of things that he'd been exploring lately.

_Perhaps he really had been foolish to let so much pass without punishment until now and to behave around this vampire as if he wasn't a slave. Look where that leniency had gotten them._

Words that Zero hadn't planned on were slipping past his lips now, an automatic reaction born of anger mixed with all that he was taught as he grew up about how vampires should be treated. "Why, I should teach you a…"

Humans liked to believe themselves completely above animals, when in truth they were nothing more than a different species of mammals. Vampires on the other hand, were much more instinct-based and more prone to accept the animal side that they had no choice but living with permanently, civilized as it may be.

A wounded pureblood, cornered and frightened out of his mind, was no different from a lion or wolf in the same situation. In his fear, Kaname did all he could to fight back, and since the anti-vampire drugs made him too weakened for him to possibly put up any physical resistance beyond struggling weakly, he lashed out verbally instead, making things worse for himself.

"Oh,…teach me a lesson? Why don't you go ahead? Drop this game and just do what you came here for all along! Do you think I'm afraid of you?!!"

_Oh, but he was. He was deadly afraid._ As he spoke, he'd drawn closer and closer to the bed to put distance between Zero and himself, and his hands were shaking so hard that he had to hold onto the bed post to hide it. He didn't even know why he was egging the hunter on and making things so much worse. He kicked himself inwardly, not having meant to add the last words, which were like begging for an unforgettable beating.

_Oh shit. Now I've really done it._

He barely had the time to think before the hunter was on him, hands clasped tightly around the shackles on the pureblood's bruised wrists, slamming the slender body onto his back on the bed and climbing over him in a fluid motion, before the pureblood could even try to crawl away. Zero pinned him down hard, his weight surprisingly heavy over the pureblood's battered body. One of the hunter's legs was pressed roughly between the vampire's thighs, forcing them apart and leaving no doubts about his intentions. The amethyst eyes that had brought so much solace in the past were now like hot coals of anger, the same anger that was making Zero say words he would normally never think of saying, and preventing him from noticing how brutal they were or the effect they were having on the vampire struggling beneath him.

"You want me to do what I came here for, vampire?? Aren't you a little too defiant for your own good? It seems this place hasn't done a good enough job breaking you, since you clearly need to learn your place!"

Complete panic took over the pureblood, and he thrashed ineffectively in the other's grasp, desperately tugging away without success, trying to bare inexistent fangs, his gaze darkening as the wave of fear and horror swallowed him. His speeding hearbeats just pumped the drug-filled blood faster through his body, rendering him dizzier and dizzier as he sank into a horrified state further enhanced by the utter despair. _Just like with the other hunters… he's just like them…… nothing will ever change…!!_

Unable to fight or stop what he knew was inevitable, Kaname was both too desperate and too angry to think clearly and obey the instincts that screamed in his mind for him to drop all resistance and put up a façade of submission to try and minimize his losses. But it was too late for that anyway. At this point, he was lost in a self-destructive spiral that made him unable to turn back or even stop.  
If this was any other customer, he'd probably have been able to, because he wouldn't have gotten so worked up to begin with. With the others, he knew what to expect, and he was normally much too busy trying to appease them, trying to stay in one piece. But with Zero, everything had been so different all along. So different that his abused heart had foolishly unlocked against his reason and left itself wide open for the betrayal.

He was paradoxically too hurt to not be dreadfully afraid and expecting the worst at all times, but he was also too angry for his broken hopes, and unable to stop provoking the man, regardless of knowing he'd pay dearly for each word that rushed past his quivering lips, the anger making him say things that horrified him as they left his lips, not because of the words themselves but because of the inevitable consequences they'd have for him.

"Do it then!! Do your worst!! Why did you even bother to give me hope at all if it was just to crush it all in the end!! I knew it, I knew it all along and yet… yet-"

He regretted each word a little more as they each came out, hating the foolish confession that he never meant to voice.

But Zero himself wasn't thinking straight at the moment either, and in his anger he didn't immediately register the angry and desolate tears in the pureblood's eyes, or the way Kaname was trembling more and more, or just how broken and desperate his words were turning as they died on his lips. Once Zero cooled down and rethought the scene, things would seem a lot different, but for now, his hunter instincts were at the forefront, yelling for him to crush the resisting vampire down, and to put him back in his place.

"Be careful what you wish for… You want the worst?! Well then, you better be able to take it!!"

A hand that would normally always have been gentle and caring, but that was now rough and almost cruel, snaked up the pureblood's thigh, grabbing brutally the hip clasp of the leather thong the vampire was made to wear.

Zero shifted on the bed, kicking the other's knees aside to spread his legs, tearing the thong clasp open forcefully with one hand while he continued to pin the pureblood down with the other hand. He grabbed one of the pureblood's knees and pulled it up against his side, giving himself better access.

But before things escalated any farther, the hunter's momentum was interrupted by a strangled sob that somehow partially snapped him out of the clouded state of anger that was preventing him from noticing something that should have been obvious if he hadn't been so furious.

Beneath him, crushed into the mattress, the pureblood was biting his lips not to scream, tears rolling down his face unchecked, his breath sobbing out in pants through clenched teeth, his whole body involuntarily trembling so hard that it was nearly convulsing. One of his hands was still firmly held inside the hunter's, at an angle that looked painful, while he used the other one to try and cover his face when his sobs became more and more uncontrollable.

Zero stared, shocked and torn by a conflicting mix of residual anger and growing horror.

_I did this?!_

He pulled back, suddenly unsure, not knowing exactly what to do other than remove his weight from the other's trembling frame. The instant he released the pureblood, Kaname curled up into himself on his side, pulling his legs to his chest in an instinctive gesture to protect himself, futile as that may be. Nature had wanted him powerful, proud and untouchable, and the current world had dragged him lower than any life form he could think of, crushing far more than just pride and hope in the process. The pureblood hated himself for everything that this wretched world had made him, he hated himself for the weakness, for the mind-tearing fear and vulnerability flooding his body, for the tears spilling down his face, for every single shameful display in front of the enemy that was about to utterly destroy him without return.

_Any time now…_

But Zero was just staring with a lost look, standing as if frozen in front of the bed, horrified by the consequences of his actions, and fighting the contradictory instincts creating a whirlpool of confusion within him. A part of him, a primal hunter side that demanded the blood of the enemy, of the chosen prey, was still screaming for him to subdue the other and assert all the necessary dominance over him to ensure he wouldn't dare to stand back up to confront him again, _ever_ again.  
But the other part, the humane and gentle side of Zero that had comforted Kaname each time he'd seen him suffering was absolutely disgusted at how he'd just treated him, and so considerably more revulsed by what he _knew_ he had been about to do an instant later if the pureblood's sobs hadn't stopped him before it was too late.

_I'm… I'm no better than them. And he looks at me with the same fear he has when he looks at them…_

He reached over, brushing the vampire's shoulder with the urge to try and reassure him, but Kaname just jolted as if Zero's touch had burned him, burying his face further behind his folded legs and arms, ragged breath sobbing out unsteadily, body still trembling just as hard.

If Zero managed to ignore the clamoring protests of his hunter instincts, his gentle side told him to pull the other into his arms, but… the memories of the failure earlier during the mission were still very fresh and inevitably reminded him that getting even closer would be a very foolish thing to do.

He watched the trembling vampire on the bed, unsure of what to do and torn between ideals and the horrible reality.

_Horrible as it may be, this was the order of things after all._ _This was how the world was, how it was supposed to be, at least now._ Thinking he could somehow try to change things for a vampire, this one or any other, was nothing short of foolish youthful idealism, like his master and others believed. The Hunt itself had proved that so well, hadn't it? _Hunters and vampires shouldn't go near each other, it was wrong and not meant to be in any way._ And had he not made things even worse for this vampire by giving him fake hopes that weren't possible in the status quo of the post-war society?

Zero swallowed hard, forcing himself to step back, to put distance between the curled up form on the bed and himself. He rearranged his creased clothes and cleared his throat, not really expecting that he'd get the other's attention through all the sobbing and panic, but Kaname did hear him. He was still much too afraid, but he was also puzzled as to why the hunter wasn't raping him. _He'd gone so far without continuing…_

The straps from the thong hung from the pureblood's thigh, a tattered reminder of how vulnerable he was not only mentally but also in his appearance, partially naked already, thrown on the bed and ready for the taking.

_Then why was the man not doing it? He'd even said he would... _

A part of Kaname, far too used to such sick games, feared the other was just waiting for him to look up before hitting him. But he still couldn't prevent himself, if anything because even that might be less bad that the terror that was eating at him while he waited each second with his breath held, not knowing when it would finally happen.

To his surprise, instead of finding the hunter leaning over him naked as he expected, he saw Zero still fully dressed and standing by the door as if he was about to leave. The pureblood shifted unsteadily to prop himself up on an arm, looking up worriedly.

The fury was gone from Zero's face. It was still looking reserved, but no longer dangerously cold or cruel. It just looked… so terribly unsure and confused, in a way that made Kaname wonder what was happening. The hunter spoke, but his words didn't make things any clearer.

"I'm sorry I frightened you. I didn't want to. This whole thing was just a really stupid idea... We should probably just forget about it all and each move on."

There was a rather vague apologetic glint in his eyes, but they were still guarded and partially hostile, nowhere near the warmth they once had.

Unsure of what to say, the hunter just gave the vampire one last pointed look before turning around and leaving, the click of the door closing behind him being the only thing making the scene feel real in the pureblood's eyes. Kaname's gaze lost itself on the door, confused and having trouble processing what had just happened.

_What? What did the hunter 'not want' to? Why was he not……_

And the way he spoke of the_ 'whole thing'_… it was clear Zero wasn't referring just to the discussion they'd just had, but to so much more. To the whole idea of getting close to Kaname in the first place_…_

_Was he not coming back anymore?!_

_And why did that mere thought make him feel like someone had stabbed through his chest with a hot poker?!_

_How stupid could he possibly get?! The man had nearly raped him, and he was horrified at the idea of not seeing him again?! How more pathetic could he possibly become?!_

But knowing it was stupid and inacceptable didn't prevent the pureblood's wobbly legs from moving of their own accord, struggling to get up from the bed and taking him to the door in a succession of unsteady steps.

He touched his forehead to the wood, the contact making the loss feel so much more real. He hated himself all over again, but he was too shaken and didn't have enough energy left to be angry at himself for the fact that he wished the man who'd nearly raped him would return. He both wanted and feared it, because he was torn between terribly needing the other's comforting touch, and… what his reason told him—that if Zero ever _did_ return, it would be to finish what he nearly did today. Why else would he bother coming back now that the mask had dropped?

The pureblood leaned his side on the door tiredly and slid down to the ground to sit in an inelegant heap, wrapping bruised arms around his sides and failing all over again to hold his tears in.

_Why have you made me feel that way for you if you were just going to break my hopes like that?! _

_Why have you made me long for your visits if you were going to do this?!_

_You do such cruel things to me…_

.

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.

[tbc]

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_Another chapter title pulled from the lyrics of "It's all tears" by HIM. XD_

_Please don't hate Zero in the fic for this chapter? ^^; Lifestyle/belief changes are never easy, and until now it was simpler for Zero since it was mostly him showing compassion and gentleness to Kaname, but now that he is realizing more that it will inevitably affect his life as well, things are harder..._

_You get a bit of an advance glimpse of the idea of blood bonds in CoB in this chapter. ;D_

_And speaking of VK blood bonds, Blackened Wing is a beloved friend and I adore her fics and her version of how blood bonds work (it's by far the hottest I've ever encountered on the subject X3), which lots of VK fic authors have borrowed since Crimson Door, but I have my own view of that lovely vampiric theme, so don't expect it to be the same. ^^;/  
Hopefully mine will also be enjoyable, even though I am sure hers is far sexier. X3_

_"Blood bonds", like "blood drinking" or other such things are all vampire-related themes with tons of possibilities and potential, and which are free to use by anyone in their stories, but the way each author makes them work within a story or a world as well as the way it affects the characters/the consequences/the symptoms/etc. belongs of course to the author having that idea, and would naturally be different from an author to another. ^^/  
I'm not saying that using another author's settings for something like that is bad (as long as you asked them permission/credited them for the idea, of course), especially if it's done with respect for the author and produces lovely & sexy fanfic as a result (XD), but I just have my own idea of how bonds work among vampires, which, like hers, is based on various elements of the VK canon that inspire such interesting possibilities to develop in fics. ;D So yeah, hopefully you'll like it. :3 *still thinks BW's is much better though* XD  
_

_And btw, because someone had asked why Kaname didn't know that Zero's feelings were genuine from drinking his blood (err, I still haven't caught up with review replying ^^;), the reason is because he drank it in their first meeting before Zero had the idea of returning to the house, and before he saw Kaname hurt and had the urge to protect him and make things less bad for him.  
In fact, Zero almost returned to the house to_ _bed him the next day. XD;  
So Kaname only felt that part of him back then. (That and his abilities are pretty dulled by the anti-vampire drugs, so things can vary/he might not be able to sense too much. ;) )_

_  
__**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)_

_Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured._

_On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

* * *


	12. When love is a gun separating me and you

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 12 –"**__**When love is a gun separating me from you."  
**__**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Sorry for the delay in posting this chapter! ^^;  
I've been rather busy lately, but hopefully the next chapter won't take as long! ^^; (I hope. XD;;)_

_This chapter has some one-sided Aidou x Kaname also. :D_

_Again thank you so much to __all the wonderful people who have been writing such lovely reviews~! ^_^/  
Hearing from you and knowing what you think of the different things in the fic, always gets me all re-energized and motivated to write!! :D__._

* * *

.

.

He wondered if the burning guilt would ever finally leave him.

For the nth time that evening, the young hunter found his eyes wandering to the longcase clock against the wall, automatically wondering what the pureblood might be doing around this time, unable to rid himself of the memory of his trembling limbs and betrayed tears as he pinned him to the bed.

The guilt had seared that memory into the hunter's mind, and just wouldn't let him forget what he'd been almost about to do to the vampire, in a moment of anger, pushed to the edge by what had happened that day, by his hunter instincts towards vampires, and... by the very undeniable lust he felt for the dark-haired pureblood.  
Sweat trickled down the back of Zero's neck. Anger hadn't been the only thing motivating his acts earlier, and he hated himself for that. He knew that when he had shoved the pureblood down onto the bed, he'd meant the words he'd said, and he'd very much wanted to take him.

Now, on the other hand, he was utterly disgusted at himself and at what he'd almost done.

And he was also inevitably aware that saying 'we should forget about this all and move on' made no sense and just painfully reminded the other of how slaves had nowhere to 'move on' to, forever locked in the servility they were forced into.

_Am I nothing but a hypocrite like all those people who commit the worst atrocities at the 'houses' each night and then return to their safe and happy positions as well respected members of society?!_

"Zero? Hey, did you hear anything I've told you in past five minutes?!"

The younger hunter turned back to the source of the increasingly annoyed voice, registering once again his master's presence. _Oops_.

His thoughts had been once more straying off to the pureblood he'd left looking miserable in the 'house', about an hour or so earlier.

Master Yagari and Ichiru had been making dinner when Zero had gotten home, and presently both hunters were sitting on the living room couch exchanging meaningless chatter while the younger Kiryuu twin finished setting the table. Yagari had a half-finished little bottle of beer held loosely between his fingers, and had been in the middle of telling some humorous story about some fellow at the headquarters who had done something or another that ridiculed him and provoked the general hilarity of Yagari and some others during some mission or another.

Or at least, he was attempting to tell the story. For the _third_ time. He'd had to start it all over again each time because Zero's mind was elsewhere.

Even after three times, Zero wasn't quite sure of the details of the story. By now, the older hunter was less than amused.

"I swear, it's like you're brainwashed!!"

Zero jolted slightly at that, eyes widening. _In a way, maybe it was true?_

He wasn't exactly 'brainwashed' in the sense that someone had done it on purpose, but it was undeniable that the vampire had had quite an effect over him. From the very first instant they met.

Zero had often wondered why he'd felt so compelled to help Kaname, to the point that the very first time he'd met him, he'd given him a little of his blood to help soothe the pureblood's aching wounds from having had his fangs torn out.

It was unforgivable for anyone to offer their blood to a vampire, but for a hunter of all people, it was countless times more unthinkable, shocking, taboo and all sorts of horrible things. And yet… in Zero's eyes it had seemed right, on the moment. Against all that he'd learned and known all his life, against all logic and reasoning, it just seemed that easing the other's pain was the right thing to do.

_How could something so utterly __**wrong**__… strangely feel just so right?! _

If he thought about it from a cool and objective standpoint, it was pure madness, but whenever he found himself near the enticing pureblood, he was just inevitably carried away, incapable of resisting the urge to protect him and rescue him from any harm. He'd tried to make sense of it all and failed, so he'd made up excuses, telling himself that it was a form of research, that it was harmless at worst and that at best he'd learn more about the enemy race and become a better hunter.

But the truth was that each time he saw the pureblood badly hurt, he had to hold back the unbelievable urge to give him blood again –it was shocking enough he'd even feel that urge, much less have to hold himself back from doing it.  
And he may have managed to resist that, thanks to his upbringing as a hunter reminding him of how inacceptable it was supposed but be, but he hadn't been able to resist the urge to see him, and to try to protect and comfort him, even if it was just by giving him a reassuring companionship that no one else would provide, and a tentative non-threatening presence to talk to…

_What a strange idea, a hunter trying to start a friendship with a vampire. If that was whatever he had been foolishly trying to do._

_And see how well that ended._

The way he had been distracted during the mission earlier that day had been the most shamefully perfect proof of what a bad idea getting near the pureblood was.

Although the present state of inattention was a pretty bad thing too. He forced himself to shake the thoughts away, but the guilt just wouldn't leave him. Yagari was staring at him with a scrutinizing look that sent shivers of worry up the younger man's spine even before his master broke the awkward silence in the room.

"Zero, I've been worried about you. You're strange lately, you're never home… I drop by as often as I normally do, and I'm used to Ichiru not being around all the time, but it's rather weird to find everything locked and no one home so often."

_Shit. He'd noticed. _Well, obviously. How could anyone miss it? He didn't visit the pureblood all that often, but considering how before he used to spend so much of his evenings at home, and Yagari used to drop by often enough that it was as if Zero and Ichiru's place was an extension of his own home, there was no way he wouldn't notice. In fact, often enough when the older hunter wasn't too busy with the Association to come over, he pretty much spent more time at their place than at his own, since his apartment was an old bachelor's flat that was stoically decorated and devoid of life or of someone waiting for him.  
Yagari had dedicated much of his youth to the Hunter Association, and the rest of it to raising the Kiryuu twins, so getting a life of his own had somehow ended up a lower priority in his eyes, until too much time had passed and he'd grown too accustomed to his lifestyle and unsure whether he'd ever end up getting around to changing it or not.

The older hunter was about to make a joke about how he'd been forced to eat crappy take-out food much too often lately whenever he dropped by to have dinner and found the door closed and no one home –he had a set of keys, but there wasn't really a point to let himself in to eat alone—but he saw how worried his disciple's face had looked and he realized that perhaps it was more serious than he'd assumed.

He'd noticed that Zero had been away often this past week or so, and Ichiru had even mentioned he hadn't returned home at all one of the nights, but past the natural surprise at the sudden behavior change, Yagari wasn't really worried yet – he'd simply assumed Zero had finally outgrown his years of focusing on nothing but the hunt almost obsessively and was dating a young lady somewhere. He was actually a bit relieved, having feared that Zero might end up like him by focusing so much on the Association that there was almost nothing left in his life.

But now that Zero was looking like a deer caught in headlights at the mention of his recent absences, Yagari suddenly wondered if perhaps things were not as innocent as they'd seemed.

Ichiru dispelled the tense atmosphere by entering the room to announce that the food was well on its way to getting cold, but the lingering impression of unease had planted the first seeds of doubt in the older hunter's mind.

--

Elsewhere in the city, a pureblood vampire, a being that should have been made of raw power and strength in body and mind –but that the current world had reduced to a frail body covered in bruises and pushed to an extreme after another while desperately trying to survive— was now worrying about strangely similar issues.

A heavy-bodied male was above him, pinning him down face first onto the bed, a rough hand painful on the pureblood's hair. Kaname had trouble breathing with his face buried into the mattress. His legs were painfully spread apart over the side of the bed, and one of his arms was twisted behind his back –not out of necessity but merely to make him more helpless and uncomfortable.  
And yet, somehow he wasn't fully focused on the horror at hand. Not on the brutal bucking jarring his already hurt hips, nor on the splitting pain that inevitably shot to his core with each thrust, a pain that would _never_ go away, because slowly as he may heal now, he'd always eventually heal… over and over presenting against his will a virgin body to his new violators, whenever his body managed to heal enough to restore him to the way he was meant to be –perfect and young-looking forever, regardless of how much his body and soul were defiled without possible salvation.

Any other day, he'd be in agony over the slavery he couldn't possibly escape from. But today, he found something that –for the moment at least— felt horrible enough to rival even that agony.

_Kiryuu-sama…_

The solace he'd known in his presence and that had shattered so fast, in a single meeting. The solace he yearned for so badly…

When had he come to depend on the other like that? To look forward to his every visit with such a needy desperation that the idea that the gentle silver-haired hunter wouldn't return was killing him more surely than the brutal abuser pinning him down on the disarrayed bed?

The man grunted as he found release, and pulled out not long later, paying no heed for the body sagging down on the bed once he let go of him. Luckily, the man was too focused on having his own pleasure and leaving soon and didn't care for the vampire's unresponsiveness. A more demanding customer would have objected to it –probably violently.

Kaname remained on the bed, in the position the man left him, unable to even care what might happen to him at the moment.

_Kiryuu-sama would never return. _

_He'd broken the mask, so why would he bother coming back now?_

Oh, he might come back. But it wouldn't be the same 'him'.  
It wouldn't be the kind silver-haired hunter who'd brought him cream puffs, or who'd gone as far as giving him a chess set and playing with him.

Or, even more amazing, who had given him blood when he was hurting, and who held him close in his arms and brushed his fears away when he was completely broken.

It would be just another hunter. The same face, but twisted with a cruel look, the gentleness drained from those soft amethyst eyes. If he even did return to torment him. He might not find it worth the trouble and simply move on as he was puzzlingly saying.

_And whose fault was it that the game had ended so soon? Who lost his composure and foolishly pushed the hunter into breaking his mask of gentleness…?_

A tear ran down out of the corner of the pureblood's eye, rolling over the bridge of his nose and hanging there for a second before falling onto the bed sheets. Kaname's eyes stared blankly at nothing in particular, and he couldn't bring himself to get up and get ready for the next customer.

_So what if a handler came? So what if another customer came?_

A second tear joined the first, and then another and another, until he found that his body was shaking.

_Was he really crying that hard? For a hunter?  
A hunter who was merely playing him all along, and who would probably return to rape him if he ever did come back?_

No reasoning could quench the stabbing pain in his heart though.

_Kiryuu-sama…… Kiryuu-sama…!_

In truth, he was crying for the illusion of that hunter, for the gentle side of Zero, which Kaname could only assume was a mask.

That same side of Zero who currently burned with guilt for having hurt him, but the pureblood didn't know that. With his experience of hunters, there was no way he could possibly think that the gentle side was real, so in his mind, it inevitably translated into the 'real' Zero Kiryuu being a random young hunter who would grow tired of this game and resume being like all the other hunters any time, and the gentle side _had_ to be a mask, worn only to fool the pureblood by giving him a false sense of safety and tricking him into a dangerous dependency and almost a twisted sort of trust and yearning for the other's visits, a game he had fallen for so well, and a mask that was now shattered and cast away…

The way Kaname saw it, Zero's plan had worked admirably well. Even knowing it had to be fake, that it could only be an act all along, he'd fallen for Zero's kindness, against his best reasoning. He was just so lost and desperate… in so much pain, physical and mental. How could he possibly _not_ cling to that fleeting solace?

And now, the time of the endgame had come, or so the pureblood thought.

He hated himself even more because regardless of all he knew from direct experience, and how much he was certain that it had to be all fake, even now he still foolishly hoped it would turn out to be real, and that the hunter would somehow come back and be gentle to him again, shooing away the pain and the fear even if only for a fleeting moment of artificial relief.

He clenched his teeth harder, but the tears didn't stop rolling down his flushed face. The pain in the rest of his body registered only as a dull throbbing in the background, his mind too busy processing the pain in his heart.

Let them come. If they punished him for not being ready for the next person, as they inevitably would… then so be it. _It would serve him well, as punishment for his actual mistakes._

But what were those mistakes exactly?He wasn't really sure whether he was accusing himself for his foolish desire to trust in Zero, or for his misplaced anger that had led him to push the hunter into dropping the act.

The more bitter and caustic side of him that was too used to the world and had no more hope left sneered at the foolish side that had wanted to believe, even at the cost of whatever was left of his heart.

And now, he didn't even know exactly what fault he wanted to punish himself for, only that he was too tired to fight or even care for whatever they may do to his body in retaliation for his disobedience if he decided to simply lay there and go on crying curled up.

_Ah, Kiryuu-sama, come back… even if it's just one more time. Even if it's just to show me that my hope was misguided all along… Just so that I won't stay lost in this horrible doubt._

A doubt that shouldn't have ever existed in the first place, as there was no possible question about the truth of that situation… or at least his bitter side assured him.  
But the weaker and more vulnerable side of him was too lost in tears to listen, either to the dry voice of his despair or even to the door of the room opening brutally and the handler yelling at him and yanking him off the bed.

'_Kiryuu-sama'_ did not return. Not that night, nor the next day.

Kaname went through the day in a daze, partially from from the beating he'd gotten at the hands of the handlers and partially from his feelings, even if he wasn't doing well enough to focus as much on thinking at the moment.

Somehow, that paradoxically meant he might end up doing a little better than otherwise, since it triggered surviving instincts that reminded him of the importance of not attracting even more trouble or causing himself more unnecessary pain, regardless of how dejected he might feel.

The silver-haired hunter might have brought him a solace he terribly needed, right at a moment when he craved it desperately, but ultimately he had to remind himself that it was just an _illusion _of hope, and that however badly he may feel, he couldn't risk destroying the barriers that years of crushed pride and faked submission had built around his heart to protect him. He was also feeling the beating of the previous night in his very bones, and the last thing he wanted was to become a target of the handlers even more than he already was. He stood out enough by being a pureblood; there was no need to anger them further by being disobedient just because he was feeling miserable over the loss.

And yet, as he sat there on the chair he was shackled to in the display window, ignoring Aidou's worried glances and the lewd stares of the prospective customers outside waiting for the 'house' to open, he found himself unable to ignore... the lack of Zero.

The tentative warmth he'd been feeling lately was gone from his heart, replaced by a frozen emptiness that threatened to devour his soul.

Going back to the way things used to be before would be so terribly harder than he'd originally assumed.

--

On and on, regardless of how much the pureblood ignored him, Aidou continued his careful attempts of sneaking glances at Kaname.

He could see well enough that the older vampire had taken quite a beating, but that wasn't anything new. Kaname was the most sought after possession of the 'house', and his nature as a pureblood made that often the most sadistic customers chose him. But this was different. Aidou was pretty sure Kaname wasn't more drugged than usual, and yet… the pureblood had such an empty feeling emanating from him. He looked so terribly lost.

Much more than the wounds that Aidou could see, the desperate emptiness in the pureblood's gaze worried him considerably. He was already wondering if Kaname's usual tormentor –Ichiou— had done something new to further haunt his favorite victim. The young blond trembled with rage at the idea of that possibility.

_Kaname-sama… If only I had the strength to snatch you out of this nightmare and take you away, where no one would ever find you. I would sacrifice anything to protect you. I would hold you in my arms and never let anyone hurt you ever again, for as long as I lived._

Wrists chained to his own chair, Aidou couldn't reach and try to touch the pureblood –not that he'd have been able to do so even if he was free, or at least not without attracting a world of trouble with the handlers, for the both of them. A meager replacement for the impossible touch, the blond's gaze brushed over the pureblood in a gentle caress, desperately wishing he could do more than just watch him from afar.

Vampires were by nature very seductive creatures. Many were the slaves who had over the years tried in vain to seduce their captors in the attempt of gaining a better treatment or even to try to escape from their horrible condition.  
Of course, such attempts inevitably failed flatly at best, and had tragic consequences at worst – the hunter society was far too comfortable with the way things presently worked, and no one was willing to risk their own status to help an enslaved enemy… Being labeled a vampire sympathizer could easily ruin one's career, and slaves –at least of higher quality— were expensive enough that no one wanted to seem overly permissive, considering that the Hunter Association would confiscate slaves from lenient masters and put them back for sale without any reimbursement of the former master's expenses in acquiring the slave.

As a result, when in doubt even the masters not normally as inclined to violence would take the most severe route to ensure they wouldn't be looked down by their peers. With everybody acting that way, things could easily escalate as more and more cruel punishments were used more and more widely. This was true not only for the private slaves but also for the ones in the brothels.

Aidou had been a rare case of someone trying to be extra seductive not to improve his own condition, but in hopes of finding anyone willing to help him save someone else… although inevitably, no attempt had ever worked, however charming and enticing the young blond may be. Or perhaps, it was _because_ he was so charming and pleasant that his attempts hadn't had worse consequences than the repeated beatings he'd gotten.  
A less popular slave –more expandable merchandise— might have had a much worse fate as punishment for his daring attempts.

Even if it _had_ been possible for him to rescue Kaname and escape… they'd be hunted down and recaptured immediately, most likely before they could even get out of the blood district.

Weakened, drugged and alone in a city full of hunters, they wouldn't make it very far.

Aidou clenched his teeth, once more going through so many ideas and possibilities that he knew offered no escape.  
Even if they could somehow leave this city, then what? The wasteland in the deserted areas? Hiding in the ruins and abandoned buildings, starved for food and blood, constantly on the run and afraid of what would happen if someone did catch them, escaped slaves that they were?  
He had no way to even know how many weeks or even months it might take before the drugs wore off enough for them to have even a little of their vampiric strength back. The drugs were formulated to weaken them completely, not only making them unable to use their powers, but even unable to use the speed and strength that nature had normally given them – even flexing one's muscles was a tiring effort in itself. They would be unable to outrun a search party.

Young as he may have been during the war, Aidou had always been a child ahead of his age for many things, and his curiosity had lead him to hear horrible stories of how the hunters had captured so many of their kin during the various battles.  
He couldn't possibly imagine taking Kaname from one horrible nightmare into another, having him hide in a precarious shelter, never knowing whether the hunters would be upon them with hounds and guns any time. His throat tightened at the mere idea of the enemy possibly catching Kaname again, or what might be done to an escaped pureblood.

And even if they had a way to hide for a long time… he'd never live as long as Kaname. At one point or another, he'd no longer be able to protect the pureblood, and the idea of leaving him alone at the mercy of enemies horrified him almost as much as the knowledge that he was currently unable to protect him anyway.

So much time had been wasted already. Moisture born of bitterness and self-directed anger burned in the blond's eyes when he looked back at their first meeting and all that he'd foolishly wasted.

The first time he'd met Kaname, he was four and the little pureblood, five. The Kurans had been visiting the manor of the strongest clan among their allies, the Aidou family, and while the adults talked, little Kaname had escaped their supervision and let himself into the room where Aidou had been reading in preparation of his more advanced classes, that would start soon.

The little blond was the long awaited and much spoiled first male child of the Aidou clan, far too used to being the center of attentions, to the point that he actually believed himself to be the prettiest and smartest child of all… When he saw the pureblood, he was so floored by everything Kaname exuded that his misplaced pride kicked in, _hard_. As a result, Aidou's first reaction hadn't been to acknowledge the attraction he felt for him, but to reject him brutally, a childish pride getting in the way of what could have been the best years of their lives.

Kaname hadn't given up on him easily either. He'd managed to convince his parents to let him return later, with the intent of apologizing to Aidou, assuming he'd insulted him somehow.  
The blond had been shocked to see that the other boy could think he had to be at fault for something, when it was he, Aidou, who had behaved improperly –and gotten quite the earful from his father and pretty much everyone in the household the very instant the Kurans had left. He'd never seen his father cast a gaze of disappointment on him until the moment his eyes met the older vampire's gaze after he'd rejected Kaname's offer of friendship.

But with the little boy feeling even more sullen after having his pride stepped on because of the way everybody wanted him to behave around the pureblood, he was much less likely to be in a mellow mood, so their second meeting in the garden ended far worse than the first.

'_No Kaname-_sama_. You didn't do anything bad. It's just that __**I hate you.**__'_

For years, he had regretted those words. For years, he'd remembered the look on the pureblood's face, like someone had suddenly slapped him.  
Or the way Kaname had stepped back, horror dawning on his face as he said in a voice that sounded so off and different, "Oh… I see. I'm sorry."

A thousand years may pass and Aidou still wouldn't forget that the pureblood had tears in his eyes when he turned around and ran, away from them, away from the council guards that followed running to keep up with him, away from everything.

Eternity may pass and Aidou would never, ever, forgive himself for causing those tears.

Luca hadn't either, matter-of-factly. The two had a much better relationship when they were toddlers. After that incident they'd bicker constantly, as she had self-appointed herself _Kaname-sama's avenger_ –even back then she already loved him. But soon enough, even she realized that Aidou's burning guilt was more punishment in itself than whatever she might be able to dish out on him.

He spent that way the three years that followed, wishing for a chance, _any chance,_ to see Kaname again, and trying to think of what he possibly could tell him to ask for forgiveness and reclaim that friendship. He considered himself the pureblood's friend, even if Kaname didn't know.  
He'd lay in his bed each day, staring at the ceiling where weak rays of sunlight slipping past the thick curtains would play a dance of shadows and lights. In his childish mind, he imagined the light was Kaname, and he would reach for it with his little hands. But as he got more and more sleepy and his lids felt heavier, it always slipped away and disappeared, until he fell asleep.  
Often, he dreamed of Kaname, either seeing once more their meeting where he'd ruined everything and hurt the pureblood's feelings, or occasionally dreaming of finally getting to meet him again and tell him the truth: that he'd loved him all along, and that he hated himself for having ever dared to try to hate someone as kind and perfect as him. The dream Kaname would smile gently and snuggle up to him, the contact warm with understanding and gentleness.  
But inevitably, there was no one next to him when Aidou woke up and went on trying to think of what he'd tell the pureblood when he finally did get to see him again.

He counted the days to the day he'd have his seventh birthday, the 'age of reason' in the vampire society, when children were finally considered old enough to attend social gatherings – not by coincidence or mere tradition attached to the number, but actually because vampire physiology worked different from that of humans, making that by that age they were at the same degree of development as a human adolescent, and the attendance to parties etc. worked also to search a potential future mate for the young vampires that would soon be of age to start considering a bond and even reproduction, in some cases.  
Aidou dreaded that part of the idea, especially since Kaname was one year older than him, and more likely to have people making him propositions before Aidou had a chance to explain his feelings –back then, he'd assumed things would somehow go as well as in his dreams, and that once he'd confessed his love, Kaname would simply welcome him with open arms and they'd pick up from where life had gone wrong in their fated meeting when they were small.

But before the blond could find out whether or not he'd have had a chance with the pureblood, the war came and tore everything apart.

The Kurans stood for peace and refused to take part in the fighting, but their allies were of mixed opinions, and many joined the ranks of the officers the vampire armies, much as they may loathe fighting alongside the council they disagreed with.

Aidou's father was one of those people, albeit he'd only volunteered later in the war. He had initially wanted to avoid participating in it, especially since he'd always violently disagreed with the council, but when the hunter armies won victory after victory and the vampire forces started to dwindle and lack in good commanders, he joined them to try and help.

He lost his life shortly afterwards, in a particularly difficult battle where they were trying to stop the enemy's inexorable progression. The moment when the family's old butler had come into the drawing room with an uncharacteristically desolated look, and whispered something in Aidou's mother's ear was etched in the boy's memory too. She asked the four children to go upstairs, and then crumbled to her knees as they were leaving. The next day, Aidou was sent to the Cain's country estate, deeper in the countryside, where they hoped the war would take longer to arrive, and where he should be safer.

His mother and sisters left also, to hide with their maternal grandmother's family. He never saw them again.

It all only went even farther downhill from there, and in the end, he found himself in the wretched place he now belonged to, along with Akatsuki and Luca, who'd been captured with him and sold together as a group.

Fate played a really strange game. More often than not, that game turned out cruel for them, the blond thought as he stole another glance at the pureblood in the next chair. Aidou had spent years dreaming of seeing Kaname again, but he'd never expected it to happen with the two of them enslaved in a brothel. Kaname was the very air that Aidou breathed, regardless of how much the pureblood tried to ignore him to avoid getting him involved in more trouble.

There were days when Aidou hated himself for the fact that knowing how Kaname was doing at any given moment was more important to him than finding out if anyone from his family had even survived the war, if his mother was still alive, or if his sisters were in other brothels like him. They'd been separated and he never did get to know for sure, but from the moment he laid eyes on Kaname again, when he was brought to the 'house', Aidou knew that nothing else would ever matter again in his life, horrible as that may be for everyone else.

It wasn't quite completely true: he did care for his cousin Akatsuki and for Luca. They were as much his siblings as his sisters had been, or perhaps even more so due to the age difference being smaller and them having been close since they were toddlers. He was very similar to Luca, even, in that he'd spent much of his childhood playing with Akatsuki and filling his ears with tales of how wonderful Kaname-sama must be –Aidou may not have gotten to meet him again before the end of the war, but he would gather whatever information he could.

But love the two as he may, he had to admit that if he had even the slightest chance to snatch Kaname away and run, he wouldn't even turn back to look at them. Not when that would inevitably endanger the pureblood's chances of safety, already so nearly inexistent. Akatsuki and him had a silent agreement on such matters, in a way. Aidou knew that his cousin would do anything for Luca, and Aidou hoped that if Cain had a chance of running away with her, he'd seize it and not lose time trying to get him out as well. Cain had the disadvantage of being far too soft-hearted, so he would inevitably have the urge to try to free his cousin as well, but the two of them knew that in a last case situation, Aidou would choose Kaname over anyone else, and Cain would choose Luca.

Unfortunately, such escape ideas weren't possible in reality, so all he could possibly do was live them over and over in his imagination, partially out of despair and partially out of a tiny hope, even if he knew that hope was more of a lie to make himself feel less miserable than anything else.  
Each day, shackled to the same spot in the display window, Aidou would pass the time that way, while waiting for the 'house' to open and a new night of horror to start. Each day, he would watch the street, trying to see as far as he could, imagining various plans, picturing in which direction they'd run, adapting his ideas each day based on how hurt the pureblood looked and how fast he calculated that Kaname might be able to run or not.

Fruitless plans from butterflies pinned to someone's cruel collection, unable to ever escape the display case they were condemned to wilt away in. But maybe it was the only way to remain sane and not lose his mind to the horror that had already claimed his body.

He continued to watch the pureblood out of the corner of his eye, hoping that the misery he felt emanating from Kaname anew would at least eventually subside and grow more bearable.

--

Elsewhere, far from the 'blood district', Zero was glancing at the clock as the end of the workday at the Hunter Association's headquarters neared.

Normally, he'd be looking at it with eagerness, not wanting to leave too late if he could avoid it, but each time his mind wandered in that direction, he reminded himself that it was fruitless to think that way since regardless of what time the 'house' may open, he wouldn't be going there to see the pureblood anyway.

After all, the last thing he wanted was risk getting attached to the bloodsucker. Right?

_Too late for that._

He shook his head, trying to shrug off the annoying little voice of his conscience telling him that once more he was fooling himself if he thought he could just close his eyes over the matter and ignore it so easily.

_But I __**have**__ to._

_As a hunter, and as a human, I have to._

He'd seen the effect that the proximity of that vampire had had over him. He knew well that the more he approached, the more dangerous it would be.

The most logical solution would be to drop out now, while he still could do so without feeling too bad about it. He'd chosen Kaname as a favorite, but it was not uncommon for young people to have fleeting interests and abandon such a fancy as fast as it had overtaken them. No one would find it strange in the least, and he'd just bury the guilt away until it eventually faded in the background. After all, it was still early enough for such a thing to be mostly painless, wasn't it?

_Too late, much too late._

Perhaps. Perhaps it really was too late to take his distances without feeling guilty and worrying for the other, but it was a necessity. More than mere guilt was at stake. His career as a hunter and the legacy that his parents and countless generations of hunters had entrusted him with his birth were by far more important than an unexpected feeling of pity for the enemy. Especially a feeling that he couldn't even explain to himself, and that was having such problematic side-effects on his hunting abilities.

_Oh, but was it truly nothing but 'pity' that made him yearn to soothe the pureblood's pain?_

That thought –and the implication of what else could be causing his attraction— was even more disturbing than all the previous ones. The inevitable shock from the hunter's most ingrained instincts strengthened his resolve and made him go straight back home, ignoring with all his will the temptation of the coaches leaving for the blood district.  
_Not, not tonight. _He'd prove to himself that he could resist that stupid urge any time he felt like doing so. The memory of the pureblood's betrayed gaze filled with pain shouldn't move him, it was wrong. He was a hunter after all, why should he feel guilty for hurting a vampire? No one else did…  
What had happened the last time they met shouldn't have such power over him.

_Oh, but it did…_

He hurried home, hoping that his brother's company might be able to distract him from the temptation to do something utterly stupid, like going to the 'house' despite all that his instincts were telling him.

He'd prove to himself that this stupid guilt had no hold over him, and that as a hunter, he could just put that aside without difficulty. He would visit the vampire again, maybe, but only the next day or so; both to prove to himself that he could hold off visiting him on a whim, and also to prove that he could see him and still remain cold and distant as he properly should.

That seemed like a good plan, at least at the moment, through Zero's confusion.

What he wasn't counting on, however, was that the next morning, when he arrived at the hunter headquarters, instead of finding his colleagues preparing for a new day of paperwork at the end of which he intended to pay a short visit to the 'house', he found them cleaning weapons and loading ammo into the magazines of a large number of anti-vampire guns.

"Huh? We're on the warpath??"

He was only mildly joking. Hunting was a bigger part of their work than the paperwork –which was in a way derived from it— but it wasn't everyday that you saw so much weaponry out, and the gear the others were wearing wasn't the usual light stuff that all hunters wore in the routine missions. It was far heavier and more battle-ready.

"No one told you, Zero? There was a sudden order that came in late last night, for a detachment of us to raid an area of the wasteland today. Our intelligence gathering found out that a little group of survivors from the war has managed to escape our searches so far and has a small settlement in the caverns down south-west of the river."

Zero set his satchel down on the desk, feeling slightly stupid that he'd missed that the previous day, and quickly moved to get his heavier gear from the locker while the other young hunters went on babbling about the mission. He had more experience and knew well that those incursions were far more bloody and messy than they were exciting, but he didn't bother to curb down the enthusiasm of the younger of the rookies.

He got ready while absentmindedly listening to them droning on about how they'd raise in ranks via their feats of arms –easier back during the war, not so much nowadays in times of peace— and how the enemy stood no chance against them and other such things that came with the usual eagerness of youth. He'd never quite shared that reckless urge to throw oneself into battle, preferring instead to go at it from a calm and methodical standpoint, probably more deadly in the end than their less organized frenzy.

One of the more eager youths exclaimed "And unlike all those boring search missions, in this case we know for sure where they are, so we're sure to see some action right away!!"

Except that, of course, whenever things seemed too easy, they were far from truly being so.

By the time the hunter party arrived to the local where they were supposed to find the enemy, the group of survivors had long left, having caught their scent in the wind –which was blowing opposite of what the meteorology reports they checked had expected, yet another little joke from nature, perhaps— and so they found the makeshift shelter in the caves completely deserted.

For a whole afternoon and a night, they tracked the enemy group across the wasteland without success, only stopping twice to rest, hyper aware of their surroundings –one could never be overly careful when hunting vampires by night, when they were completely in their natural element.

But luckily, it seemed that this group knew better than turn back and try to strike the hunters while it was still dark. Instead, the survivors used their superior speed to put more distance between them and the hunter party, so by the next morning, rather than having gained on the enemy, the humans were much farther from catching them than when they'd started the hunt the previous day.

It was now day, however, and the higher the sun got on the sky, the more the heat rose as well, especially in the desolated rocky scenery they were now crossing. The hunters had hounds especially trained to spot vampires, scenting the enemy's trail and going hot after them, while the vampires were tiring down fast, and having more and more trouble moving in the sunny heat.

The dogs were barking more as they felt themselves closer and closer to the prey, and the hunters holding their leashes had to contain their excitement for the whole group to keep up. Unlike the search missions, this was a full-blown warlike situation, however little chances the enemy may have; the Association had sent a large group, extremely well-equipped and composed of a good sampling of different generations – mostly mature hunters, well-used to the fight, some of the younger ones like Zero or a bit older, and a few rookies in need to build up battle experience, as well as two well-distinguished war veterans leading the group. Many of the younger hunters regarded them with undisguised hero-worship.

One of the veterans was a close friend of Touga Yagari. He'd seen Zero grow up, and the moment he saw him in the group, he quickly took the youth under his wing for the mission, calling him out of the younger group and into the command row, ensuring he'd get to see most of the decision making and profit better from all he could possibly learn of the situation. The rookies and even the more experienced younger hunters were usually left farther in the back when a group would draw closer to the enemy.

By luck or by absolute terror, the vampire group ran faster than ever and managed to evade them all day, putting what little distance they still could between them and the enemy, and then scattering all over the area, making the search harder and confusing the dogs with the different scents and trails. It was only a matter of time until the hunters picked them off one by one, but the confusion was enough for them to delay the inevitable, and with the burning orange sunset filling the sky, the hunter party felt a wave of dismay at the prospect of a new night delaying things even further– the younger ones among them would be too tired to track for a second night in a row, and the dogs needed rest as well. Precious time would be wasted, but it was inevitable, and they set up camp with reinforced surveillance in case the enemy unexpectedly was foolish enough to try an attack, knowing they couldn't run forever.

The vampires were however far too weary and weakened by years of difficult life hiding in the ruins to want a fight, and however thirsty they may be, they knew better than targeting a strong and well armed group of hunters. Instead, they regrouped and took out as fast as they possibly could, trying to gain terrain, much as they probably knew that it was a lost cause with the enemy having scented them.

The hunters were talking around a few fires, preparing dinner and cooling down from the running. Many were complaining about calluses and blisters from the run across the wasteland, or exchanging garish tales of past hunts or of what might come of this one –after all, by the Association directives, vampires were to be killed or captured alive and brought back to be enslaved like the rest of their race, so it was inevitable that some of their captors would end up giving them a taste of what the slavery would be like, shortly after the capture.

A burly bearded man sitting by the fire was poking with a spoon something unidentified inside a pot of beans cooking over the flames, while telling some colorful tale about a beautiful vampire woman they'd captured during a previous hunt like this one, and who'd escaped them for three days before they finally put their hands on her and made her regret having tried to run instead of killing herself in the first place.

Zero was feeling queasy about the talk and got up to put some distance between himself and the group.

He walked around by the edges of the encampment for a bit, his eyes getting used to the dark and the cool air of the evening, blinking away the smoke from the fire —it was fueled by the rare wood of the area, still too green and full of sap, making more smoke than it would if it was dry wood.

The moon was already high in the sky, and the night was strangely peaceful and refreshing after the whole day of tracking. He knew it was just an illusion, this apparent calm hanging in the air, the sounds of the humans laughing in the background, or the occasional hunting dog whining or growling, fighting for another's food or for a juicy bone thrown for them by one of the men.

It seemed almost unfair that the world could look so… blatantly _'normal'_.

It felt as if it wasn't right for it to seem so peaceful when there was so much suffering in it, when right at this instant, they were hunting down a group of people with the very intent of killing or enslaving them. Sure, they were vampires, not humans, but the line that should never have been blurred for a hunter was now a bit too fuzzy for Zero to look at the present situation and not feel somewhat dirty, whatever his hunter instincts may tell him of the pride he should have in his ancestors and his own power.

He knew Kaname had been captured as a child and had never been a victim of the raids through the wasteland, but perhaps there were others like him among the group they were tracking down. Certainly not purebloods, but other lost beings about to suffer a fate perhaps worse than death itself.

_A lifetime of the most abject slavery… not only that, but a lifetime that could last centuries, or even thousands of years for the strongest of them…_

How horrible could such a thing be? Death seemed surprisingly painless and fast compared to such a thing.

Zero shuddered, suddenly finding the night a bit more cold than refreshing, maybe because he'd removed the heavy fighting gear and was now only wearing lighter protective material under his casual clothes. He pulled his jacket shut and zipped it, a now mirthless little smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he remembered the endearing picture that the pureblood made in this same jacket, his body thinner and smaller than the hunter's, resulting in the jacket sleeves being too long and cutely covering his hands.

That memory and the confusing thoughts he'd been having a moment earlier made Zero feel strangely nostalgic. _Only two days of hunt and he was already like that…_

He couldn't help the thoughts straying automatically to the 'house', wondering what the pureblood might be doing… and whether he was safe or not –an unlikely possibility, he knew much too well. He glanced at his wrist-watch, seeing that it was rush-hour already, at the 'blood district', and remembering the crowd that was waiting for Kaname the one time he went there around that hour. _Let's hope they're not being too cruel to him._

_It really shouldn't matter. He really shouldn't care._  
It was wrong on so many levels, because of who Zero was, because of what he was supposed to be and do, because of so many things…

He brushed his fingers over the cool frame of the Bloody Rose, his anti-vampire gun currently resting in the holster by his side. The symbol of what he was, and how impossible that interest for the vampire was.

But he couldn't help feeling his chest strangely tight at the idea that the pureblood was probably hurting, enduring the cruelty of countless people viciously abusing him over and over. No laws could justify all that. The slaves being vampires certainly didn't justify it, at least not in Zero's eyes. Making up excuses and claiming they were mere beasts rather than persons may make it okay in the eyes of the others, but Zero had seen too much to accept such a disgusting brutality and find it acceptable in any way.

He felt slightly pathetic, but he couldn't help the concern swelling within him more and more. He'd meant to go to the 'house' two days after their last meeting, but this mission's suddenness made it impossible. If he'd known about it the day before things could have been different, but as it was, he'd barely had the time to phone home to warn Ichiru that he'd be away for a while, before it was time to depart. And who knew how many days more this hunt might last, before Zero could return.

_Ichiru…_

If only he could know whether Kaname was okay or not, maybe that stupid worry would ease off a little. Stepping a bit farther away from the edge of the camp to have more privacy, Zero pulled his cell-phone out of his pocket and quickly typed a short e-mail.

[ "Ichiru, are you busy tomorrow?" ]

The younger twin was apparently not busy today, in any case, because Zero's phone rang shortly afterwards. His twin had gotten the message and was calling him back to ask what he needed.

Awkwardly, Zero finally explained that he had a favorite in a brothel, but much to his surprise, instead of seeming shocked or even disgusted, Ichiru just laughed.

"I'd known all along, oniisan. I was sure it was either that or a girlfriend, but with the way you were weird and all secretive lately, it had to be something like that…"

Zero felt his cheeks and ears turning warmer with a flush as Ichiru's chuckling on the phone went on.

"There was no way I wouldn't notice, Zero. You're like an open book when it comes to some things, and lately you'd been acting like a cat who's eaten the goldfish and is nervous about people finding out."

Zero couldn't hold much longer before he laughed too. Ichiru really was something, no matter how many years passed and the distance that had grown between them, he could still read through Zero just as perfectly as he did when they were small.

The older twin was a bit surprised that his brother was taking it so lightly, though. In recent years, Ichiru had always been openly against vampires, claiming that they were filthy beasts who shouldn't even be given the mercy of staying alive, and other things that had seemed overly virulent to Zero even before he had met Kaname and warmed up more to the plight of the slaves.

Of course, Zero had no means to know that Ichiru acted that way on purpose to eliminate any danger of being flagged as a moderate, so that he wouldn't attract attention of anyone likely to discover Shizuka. He'd perfected the art of playing a role so well that not even his twin had any idea that Ichiru wasn't truly ferociously against the vampires' right to live, even in slavery.

While Zero was an open book for his twin, Ichiru remained unreadable to everybody, and more and more puzzling and hard to guess even to Zero.

As children, Zero always knew what Ichiru was thinking, but now… sometimes he felt so distant that Zero couldn't help but wonder if he even knew him as well as he thought. But the unconditional love he had for his younger sibling made that such trains of thought never went very far –in part because Zero trusted Ichiru too much to doubt him, and in part because he did suspect that maybe things weren't as simple as they seemed, and in truth he was afraid of digging too deep and finding out anything he'd rather remain oblivious to.

All in all, Zero opted for shrugging away the surprise at how easily Ichiru had accepted his little revelation, and following through with the idea that had made him call him.

"Ichiru, if I tell you the address of the brothel he's in, would you mind dropping by tomorrow to take a quick look and see if he's okay?"

"…"

"It's just… I was a little bit worried, it's all. It's only if you have the time and it's not a bother in any way."

"Sure. I don't mind at all, Zero. Just describe what he looks like and give me the address…"

.

.

.

[tbc]

* * *

_Sorry, cliffhanger … 8D;;; *lol*_

_I decided to go with the term "oniisan" because I feel that "brother" in English doesn't feels quite the same, because people don't really use that word to normally call their brother in just any context. I'm against "fangirl Japanese", but when the characters are Japanese and it's a honorific or other title that doesn't quite translates as well into English, I think an exception might be okay. ^^;_

_The idea for the anti-vampire hunting hounds comes from some time ago when I went out to buy myself food, and a vicious poodle jumped for me while I was in line waiting to be served. ;_;  
XD;; *lol* (I wasn't bitten, but I had to jump back when it lunged. XD;;;; Eek! *lol*)  
I thought it would make sense if dogs could tell vampires from people, since horses and other animals do in the VK manga (it's mentioned that all herbivores freak out at the mere scent of a vampire, in VK).  
Dogs are carnivores, so they might or might not freak out, but they'd most likely sense a predator and try to warn humans, so it would totally make sense that they could be trained by hunters to track down vampires and all, in the context of CoB. :D (Hunters themselves have senses that allow them to know where a vampire is, to a certain point, but on a long distance pursuit like that, I thought dogs might be useful, and would give the prey a haunting feeling, much like that of a fox about to be caught by a pack of dogs and hunters. ;-;)_

_Also, I'm a fan of Terminator, and after having the dog idea I remembered that in Terminator too the dogs were used to tell the machines from people and all… XD *bonus unrelated fangirling* XD;;; *lol*  
_

_The title of this chapter is as usual, from a song by HIM. ;D *continues with her attempt to have all the chapters of this fic named after titles of songs or chunks of lyrics by them* XD;_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:  
_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
__On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	13. An unmarked grave in your heart

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 13 — "An unmarked grave in your heart."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __lemons from time to time._

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

**_  
_**_Things have been busy for me lately so chapters have been coming a bit slower, sorry! (10 days instead of a week, though I'd like to go back to the weekly rhythm if I can.)  
And thank you all for continuing to read and enjoy it, and for all your lovely reviews that always motivate me so much and re-energize me to write more! *posts then promptly gets swallowed by a hole in the ground for a few days again* XD;;_

_Also, this is the longest CoB chapter so far! O_o (I didn't want to cut before a certain scene at the end. ;D)_

* * *

.

.

There was a certain poetic beauty in the paradoxically simple complexity of their relationship.

Or perhaps it was the opposite, a complex simplicity.

The way he was both bodyguard and protector for her, doubling as a mix of landlord and butler. Or the way his body would stiffen in shock and his heart would nearly split apart when she joked saying he was a warden as well, when he reiterated his complaints each time she snuck out by herself, masking her aura but still taking immense risks if she were to be found by a hunter powerful enough to not be fooled by the hidden aura.  
It was why he'd placed her in such an isolated area of the city, so peaceful and far from the most sought out areas by the hunters, that were usually closer to the headquarters or to the more lively zones of the city. He couldn't help being afraid for her, however much he understood well that four years hiding must take a heavy toll on one who craved freedom as badly as she did, one who'd been prisoner all her life.

Shizuka had had a taste of freedom before, albeit it was short-lived.

She'd been imprisoned at birth, officially on account of her family's supposed tendency to madness. A preemptive incarceration ordered by her fiancée, Rido Kuran, who both outranked and overpowered her, and who had been picked for her before she was even born –not in the 'soulmates' or 'meant to be born for each other' way, but because he'd been spurned by his previous love and believed that if he locked his new fiancée away forever, she would never have the occasion of meeting someone that might make her attentions turn away from her duly chosen fiancé. A cruelty made even more ruthless by the fact that her 'chosen one' did not love her, and hid her from everything and everybody out of nothing but a possessive objectification, born out of convenience and the will to bend her to his wishes, rather than out of a possessive love, that might be more excusable.

But Rido never did succeed in breaking her will and making her pliant to his wishes. If anything, her imprisonment only fueled her need for freedom far more. And fate took care of delivering into her arms the catalyst for it all to set into motion.

Until that moment, she'd only ever had her dislike for Rido and a natural desire for freedom to make her wish to leave. But once she'd found love, what had until then been a muted need in the background became so much more. It was no longer her safety that was in the line, but that of her loved one, turned against his choice as he may have been. The ex-human she loved more than one thought a pureblood was able to love… But then, fools had such wrong ideas of purebloods, and perhaps beneath that veneer of perfect control and absolute coldness, they were even more alive and vulnerable than any other vampire –were their bodies not more sensitive as well, after all? All the more reason to keep such a good mask, least the lower classes find just how many weaknesses they could exploit.

Ironically, it was the purebloods' legendary strength that gave Shizuka the key for her escape. The war had been raging for a long time, and the hunter armies were nearly upon them, when the servants opened her cage, foolishly hoping she'd unleash chaos and destruction upon the enemy, saving them from the inevitable doom that was coming their way. It was _them_ that she slaughtered instead, repaying them for the countless years she'd lived in the dark, hiding her tears from their prying eyes, ever watching her from across the bars. Each horribly humiliating instant of her childhood spent behind bars came back to her memory. It didn't matter that her captivity was ordered by Rido, they enforced his orders feeding and overlooking her, they were guilty too.

By whatever irony of fate, they were lucky enough that Rido wasn't around then –she never did find out it was because of the attack on the Kurans' estate— so they seized the occasion and ran, ran for their lives as far as they could.

Truth to be said, she could have escaped sooner –no vampire servant could physically force a pureblood to stay if they wished to leave. But life was never as simple as such things. It was always shades of grey, never white or black. And those shades of grey meant that even if she'd tried to leave, Rido would drag her back inevitably, and she'd probably lose even more of her already quasi-inexistent freedom. He'd hinted to that, in his loathsome visits. He'd mentioned empty underground rooms made of dark walls and devoid of books or flowers, no windows for her to see the trees outside or anything… a confinement that she would be condemned to forever, should she foolishly disobey him.

But now, she had a reason to risk everything –love. And she had the perfect background to do so as well, the war providing them with enough chaos and confusion to escape from Rido's claws and hopefully disappear before he knew she was gone.

And it did work, at least for a while. Those were years of peace, unbelievable years that Shizuka had never imagined could one day become true.

Six years had they spent that way, in that bittersweet fairytale, sitting under the flowering trees, watching the wind carry the petals away all around them. Their happiness was only marred by the fact that she knew her lover's will was not entirely with her. He did love her, but by turning him she'd unwittingly made him her slave, and robbed him of the chance of turning her away if he'd so desired. One stronger than him might have been otherwise, but things were not perfect for them, and she wondered what sin had she committed that she would be paid back with such doubts. _If he had the choice, would he be next to her? Or would he leave?_ She would never know for sure. He assured her that he would have stayed either way, but the doubt would not leave her mind.

Regardless of that, they were so very happy, while it lasted. She loved him with all her heart, and belonged to him utterly, in ways purebloods rarely allowed themselves to belong to another. It was forbidden, of course, all the more so because he wasn't even a noble, but a mere ex-human, lower even than the level C's that the aristocracy regarded poorly already. A pureblood taking a lover among the high nobility was not uncommon, albeit it could only be acceptable for affairs without consequence, rather than for an actual life mate. Someone of lower lineage would be shocking even as a mere affair, even if they were an aristocrat, much less a level C. As for ex-humans… they weren't even regarded as proper individuals.

Shizuka's case broke so many unspoken rules of their race; it was a truly unforgivable situation.

And yet, for a while, it seemed almost as if they could get away with it. As if the rules of nature that they were bending with their love would not eventually turn on them and smite them for their horrible sin, their love against propriety that would seem utterly disgusting and nearly bestial at the eyes of anyone of their race.

Unfortunately, the inevitable eventually happened.

She'd been away for less than half a day, hunting—they had to go far from their hidden shelter, to make sure that they wouldn't rise attention— when she felt the agony within her screaming in her blood, through the bonds they had exchanged. _'Danger!!'_

But not danger to herself. Danger to him.

By the time she returned, the hunters had already done their deed. Their shelter was destroyed, and him with it. Only ashes were left.

She wept tears of blood, embracing the earth where his ashes lay, cursing herself for the fact that even with all the power within her, she could not bring him back, she could not be there when he had needed her, she could not stop it or do anything whatsoever.

It was her, who had sinned, who had turned him and ran with him, who had broken all the laws of nature and brought this upon them… and yet, it was he who had paid for it.

If she could not offer him any reparation, at the very least, she'd offer him a devastatingly bloody revenge.

She tracked his killers down, eventually discovering where to find them, and managing to approach close enough to strike. The world of hunters was a dangerous place, so she'd perfected the ability to hide her aura. Unwittingly, the fools had made things easier for her by living in an isolated area as well, something uncommon for hunters by then.

She'd watched them and their children from afar, making sure that they wouldn't see her. The older of the twins was surprisingly powerful for his age, and she was careful that he did not sense her. She understood quickly enough the secret they hid– the curse the hunters deserved so well for what they did thousands and thousands of years before, to gain their power.

_They'd consumed the flesh of a pureblood, to gain the necessary power to hunt vampires. As a result, their race had been cursed. _

Those two boys seemed to be among the victims of that curse, albeit they'd both survived, which was an unheard of occurrence. In most cases, such pregnancies ended in miscarriages or still births, with the very rare exception of one of the babies fully consuming the other's life and being born as an extremely gifted and powerful hunter, but such a thing almost never happened. She'd heard of a man that was like that, Kaien Cross, who'd attained legendary hunter status long before the war. But aside from such rarities, the case at hand was perhaps even more surprising, considering that despite having absorbed half of the second twin's power, the older one hadn't killed his sibling.

_Perhaps she would turn him. _

_Or kill them both. _

Strike where it would hurt the most, make the murderers of her beloved feel exactly what she'd felt.

_No, no matter what she did, no one could feel as much pain as she was currently feeling._

But she would give them all the pain she possibly could.

But she wasn't counting with the younger twin being so much more than she'd initially assumed. His body may be weak, but his will was pure iron, forged by years of suffering and the inexorability of fate hanging over his head. In that, they were very similar, the two of them.

In that, and in the tears they both shed the night they first met face to face.

She'd been numb with the agony of the loss, still as fresh as it was when she'd lost her beloved, even if by now her whole body and mind were numb, the cold of the snow outside seeping all the way into her soul. _It wasn't the snow. It was the loss.  
_She couldn't possibly care if anyone saw her crying by now, nor what might happen to her after she'd achieved her revenge. She came there to kill, and then to die.

He'd been crying with the realization that regardless of all he'd hoped for, the moment he knew would inevitably come had finally arrived. The words he'd overheard his parents saying _"Indeed, Ichiru is useless"_ resounded in his mind like a chain around his neck, choking the life out of him as surely as a death grip may.

That night, they realized for the first time just how much they were both kindred souls.

And for the first time, she got the feeling she couldn't kill or even turn him, and he got the feeling he had to protect her.

He took her to a safe place he had the key of, and ensured she'd be far enough from others that she wouldn't be easily found, and she let him guide her around and ask her blunt questions that any other might have killed him for.

He knew what she'd come there that night for. And he knew she'd be back for it, sooner or later.

They spent time together, talking of impossible things, things that no hunter family would ever accept their child speaking of. _'Not all vampires are bad.'_

Words that would damn him if he were to speak them to the wrong ears, but a certainty that he obtained in her presence. He may not care for her race as a whole, but she was special in his eyes, and above all else. Even though he knew she'd eventually accomplish her revenge.

It didn't matter. It was his revenge too, cruel as it may be.

_The parents that never loved him enough, the brother that always overshadowed him… so what if they were to become her prey?_

_Had they not deserved it?_

Desperation could make one ruthless beyond one's normal nature, and Ichiru had lived under the Damocles sword of his own poor health and the cold gaze of the other hunters comparing him to his brother for far too long.

But in the end, Ichiru wavered. He'd already agreed with her on the time and manner of things, and yet, at the very last instant, he changed his mind and ran back into the house, minutes before she struck, fumbling with excuses to tell Zero that he wanted him to come with him. Zero complied, as he always did, and so he was saved from the bloodbath that followed.

And even though as they left the house they were far enough from the tree that not even Zero's gifted senses could pick up on Shizuka's masked presence far away, Ichiru knew she'd be there, and threw an apologetic glance towards her as he hurried away, pulling his twin along, his hand in his.

_Did she ever resent him for it? Did he do the right thing, or was it a foolish move born of a pointless childish hesitation?_

There were so many times when Ichiru had regretted saving his twin… whenever things became too hard and he envied him too much for the love he so easily got from everybody, and for the power that so unquestionably opened him any doors in their society.

But he also loved his brother so very much. He constantly wandered between love and hate, wearing masks and playing a complicated game he'd become a master at. No one suspected him to be anything other than the weak twin, dependent of his brother for love and survival.

In truth, Zero was perhaps even more dependent of him than Ichiru ever had been, but if Zero knew the extent of the love-hate maelstrom coiling within his twin's heart, he never spoke of it. Instead, he accepted fully his guilt and _expected_ Ichiru to have a reason to hate him.

Ichiru's frequent excessive gentleness to Zero was a dual maneuver. In part, it was sincere and born from love. But a large part of it was pure cruelty, as Ichiru knew well how much Zero resented himself for having taken his twin's power within the womb –Zero _wanted_ him to be cruel to him, deeply believing this was what he deserved. So Ichiru's gentleness was like twisting the knife in the wound, rather than giving him any chance of respite from the guilt, by granting him a vague feeling of relief in the atonement that being punished would have constituted.

Zero believed Ichiru should hate him, and would have fully accepted that hate without turning against his twin… and yet, he also desperately craved Ichiru's love, so much more even after the loss of their parents.

More than his love even— since in truth, deep inside Zero didn't really feel himself worthy of being loved— he craved Ichiru's wellbeing, wanting his twin to be always safe and happy and well provided to, fussing over things and overexerting himself in a way that almost made Ichiru chuckle, when it didn't remind him of all that Zero _could_ do thanks to the power _he_ didn't have anymore, the power that now resided in Zero. He'd been serious the times he'd said he would have preferred to be born dead rather than have lived in such a miserable existence.

Although over time things had inevitably changed. The resentment for Zero always being the loved one, the center of everything and the one who had all the things he could not have, was still there, well hidden and festering as always, but the hatred he'd occasionally felt for his twin had changed into a different feeling, sometimes just as dangerous but generally more mild and less present.

This was for a great part because the blood that Shizuka freely bestowed upon him over the years had strengthened him and opened him doors that he'd always believed to be closed forever.

He didn't really intend to have a career in the hunter society –he would never submit to such a corrupt system, especially not when it also went so deeply against his own personal beliefs. Zero had had no choice, having practically grown up into it, but Ichiru would certainly not take the initiative of claiming his powers somehow awakened on their own, and hope to be accepted into the rows of the hunters so late.

No, he nurtured and honed the power growing within him, idly wondering at which point it would become so much stronger than Zero's, dangerously tempting him into doing something foolish. Not something drastic or final, but he wasn't sure what he really wanted to do when he suffered through regularly seeing and hearing everybody lavishing compliments on Zero for his amazing abilities, his precocity as a hunter, how promising he was or other such things, on and on endlessly, until Zero himself picked up on the anger in the air emanating from Ichiru, and started completely refusing the compliments, mortified by them rather than pleased, because where the others only saw his prowess, when he saw the strength he'd unwittingly robbed from Ichiru.

The brotherly links between them were tattered but held, and currently, Ichiru had more important things in mind than hating Zero, especially since he spent far too much time out of home, either trying to spend more time with Shizuka or trying to avoid seeing his twin too much. The band was a mere excuse, he rehearsed far less often than he claimed to his twin.

The protective fascination he'd long felt for the pureblooded woman had over the years blossomed into love, but much to his frustration he still could not pin-point what _she_ felt for him. He'd come to believe that purebloods might not be capable of love at all, or if they were, then it was only possible when that love was directed at another vampire… unless Shizuka's heart had shattered completely with the loss of her first love, and she was no longer able to feel such feelings.  
But regardless of such discouraging thoughts, he persevered. Like today, when he'd dropped by for a quick visit and to make her food –Shizuka never cooked, unless she did so out of a momentary fancy, and usually with eccentric results.

She woke up around the middle of the afternoon, to the delightful scent of vanilla and eggs, thick heavy cream beaten with the eggs and soaking the soft slices of brioche that Ichiru was finishing to prepare. For him, it was time for a really late lunch or a much too early dinner, but for her it was still early for breakfast –depending on the mood of the day, they called their meals by one name or another independently of order of it or even of what was being served.

She strolled into the kitchen with a peaceful smile on her face, hiding one last yawn behind her elegant hand that stuck out of the sleeve of a long kimono she'd tossed over her shoulders loosely, more because the propriety of her ancestry prevented her from walking around in front of a young man in her sleeping garments –regardless of the fact they covered everything— rather than because she was cold.

He smiled fondly at her, aware that in a small diminute way, the gesture meant she might have finally started to more or less see him as a bit more of a man rather than a boy.

Shizuka approached the stove and peered down at the golden _'pain perdu'_ –french toasts— eagerly, almost surprised that a dish that was originally considered by vampires one belonging to the lower ranks could be so delicious when prepared by Ichiru.

"They're almost ready. I didn't know in what mood you felt, so I brought different types of fruit juices so you could pick whatever you might feel like at the moment. I put it all in the fridge already."

Little traditions they had between them, and that could have stayed unspoken without changing anything –he didn't have to explain, she was used to having her every whim indulged by him and knew she would always find her favorite things in the fridge at all times, as he kept track of everything and replenished it whenever needed. It was a pleasant constancy, even if her rebellious nature occasionally pushed her to exit and buy something different in a nearby shop, claiming she didn't feel like the usual.  
Inevitably, whenever that happened, whatever she bought would be added to his list of things to get and bring her. It was hard to resist teasing him, even though she realized well that all he did was for her safety, and never to restrain her freedom. Such was their silent agreement – he would be there for her always, but never hinder her freedom. Perhaps it was unfair for him, but she believed that this unfairness was perhaps better than letting him fully into her life, knowing the consequences this would inevitably have for him sooner or later. As it was, it was dangerous enough that they were so close.

_Nothing good comes out of loving a pureblood. Only death and destruction stand on the path of those who lose themselves in such feelings for a pureblood._

The certainty of her belief spoiled her pleasant state of mind, and she was moody by the time she sat down to eat. He served her first, all his gestures precise and in the perfect manner a vampire would have, then served himself and sat down as well, wishing she'd retained the peaceful look she had earlier, and that was now lost to the tempest within her graceful eyes.

The evening went by calmly, but coldly, as she felt unnerved by her earlier thoughts and continually pushed him away each time he initiated a new subject of conversation.

Ichiru was used to her capricious nature, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt or annoy him, especially since his feelings for her were so serious, while she often treated him as a child, as if no matter how much he grew up, it would never be enough for her.

He had been intending to spend time with her prior to going to run the 'little errand' Zero had asked him the previous night… He was terribly curious about Zero's favorite –the mere idea of his proper and nearly uptight brother going and getting a favorite in a brothel seemed so very amusing and puzzlingly unexpected— but he felt weird about going to a brothel without first dropping by to see his actual love. They were not in a relationship, and he was certain that she couldn't care less if he slept with anyone, but something within him told him that he ought to make sure first. Deep inside, he wanted to belong to her, and as such felt wrong about sleeping with someone other than his love. Sadly, he also knew that the chances she'd ever accept him that way were pretty much impossible, adding frustrated lust to the already explosive mix of his feelings.

In the end, the evening ended on a sour note, both exchanging words that were more bitter than they'd meant, until he'd actually been unable to hold back anymore and got up, asking her suddenly "What am I to you, Shizuka-sama?!"

She'd looked at him as if he was no more than a wall she was casually glancing at, and then uttered such cruel words…

"You? A convenient bodyguard."

He'd clenched his fist so hard that the knuckles where completely white against the table top, and he'd left the place with a whirlpool of frustration and anger within him.

She'd watched him go, from behind a lacy curtain, seeing him run across the park in front of the building, until he disappeared out of sight.

The words she had told him were not the ones she _wanted_ to tell him, but they were the ones she _had_ to say, to protect him. Because he protected her, and she protected him back, with her blood and her distance.

The truth was, she didn't know what to say in reply to his question. She didn't know for sure what he was for her. What she said was partially true, but not the entire truth. He certainly _was_ very convenient, providing her with safe shelter and everything she might need, and he _was_ her bodyguard… but these days, he guarded so much more than just her body, even if she would not admit to herself that her heart too felt safe and at peace in his presence.

She repeated to herself that as long as she denied it to him and to herself, things might be able to just go on fine as they had gone for the past four years. If only she continued feigning that she didn't understand the depth of his feelings…

The problem was –the human element— much as Ichiru loved her, he had no idea that she felt that way, or that she intended to protect him by hiding so much of the closeness she felt for him. They were very close, but she made sure that it always seemed like she let him near because he was a child, something non-threatening at her eyes, when in truth, she only acted that way because it was the only way to enjoy that closeness without risking so much more.

Without knowing that, he naturally assumed that she truly did not consider him the man he was, and that she was merely toying with him. Shizuka played the game too well, so well that even one as skilled at lying as Ichiru himself could not distinguish the act from the reality.

Unable to be angry at her, he was furious at himself, for not being so much more, for not sweeping her off her feet and being so perfect that she couldn't possibly deny any longer that he had long ceased to be a child. If only he was someone able to win her heart, but he'd never been good at such things… unlike Zero, of course, who was easily loved by all.

His anger swung towards Zero instead, inevitably. Zero, who was so good at being loved by just about anyone, even as he tried to push others away and refuse their compliments. Zero, who was oh-so-perfect and respected by all. _Zero._ A snarl of anger was on the younger twin's lips as he spat his brother's name.

Fuming, Ichiru walked into a barber's shop, getting the sudden urge to get a haircut. Zero and him were identical in absolutely everything, except that his hair was slightly longer than his twin's, giving him a more innocent appearance which was fitting for a singer but perhaps not as much for a warrior, hence why Zero kept his own hair shorter.

When Ichiru exited the shop, however, he was the perfect exact image of Zero, down to the very way his twin moved about and acted –they'd been together all their lives, and for one so used to deception as Ichiru, imitating someone who was already identical to him was the easiest thing.

"Let's see now what your whore looks like, brother. With luck, he'll be beautiful enough to make it worth the time I'll waste going to see him."

--

As he sat in the display window of the 'house' with the other vampires, moments before the opening, Kaname was staring emptily at the ground outside, his eyes lost in the greyness of the concrete sidewalk merging with the asphalt of the street, both dirty with half-melted snow turned to mud. It had snowed hard during part of the previous night, but the city activity was quick to make the ephemeral white blanket disappear, in a way that strangely reminded him of how easily his own innocence had been lost.  
He shivered a little, not warm enough despite being indoors, and despite the sunlight burning his skin. _He was always so cold._

Before nightfall, the time when the brothels opened their doors each evening, it was still too bright outside and the vampires in the displays were blinded by the sunlight, unable to pay much attention to the people outside or how they were looking at them, however much it still hurt to be exposed in such a way to the passerbys, even after so many years. The things they were made to wear left them practically naked, if not even more lewdly exposed than if they had truly been naked. The lecherous gaze of the prospective customers outside left no doubt about their intentions for the slaves, and sent shivers into even the most hardened of them, regardless of how much abuse they'd grown used to after so many years of forced servility in the brothels.

Aidou was doing his usual careful glancing at Kaname every so often to check on him, when _**it**_ happened… A man with silvery short hair approached the display outside, pushing his way among the people picking the slaves in display and waiting for the door of the 'house' to open in a moment.

The man looked around for a second, then spotted Kaname and flashed an unreadable half-smile at the pureblood, whose eyes widened in absolute surprise, his heart skipping a beat at the sight.

Aidou was used to seeing Kaname trying to remain always in control, so he knew well that it had to be quite a surprise for the pureblood to gasp audibly as Kaname just did.  
And now, the blond was eyeing the man outside with extreme wariness. There was something about him that he couldn't place. He was sure he'd seen him before, so he might be a recurrent customer, but… there was something strange in the air, and in the way Kaname was reacting as if it wasn't just any random hunter.

Ichiru pushed the door of the 'house' resolutely, and smiled easily in response to the greeting of the older woman behind the counter, who had visibly taken him for his brother. It figured that Zero would be well-liked even in such a place, he sneered inwardly.

On the phone, the older twin had described how the slave looked like and where to find him on the display. Zero was clearly not expecting his brother to actually go into the 'house', and he had even expressly said not to bother with investigating any further if he didn't see him on the display.

Ichiru was curious however, and was nowhere about to leave without having taken a closer look… if not _more_ than just a look.  
He filled up the usual paper, signing his brother's name instead of his own, and when a handler finally did bring the vampire, handing Ichiru the end of the customary little silver leash attached to the slave's collar, the younger twin actually had to steel his features to hide his surprise –it wouldn't do to look surprised about something that Zero was bound to know already, but there was something Ichiru realized now that he hadn't immediately noticed when he briefly looked at the dark-haired vampire back in the display.

Now that he saw him up close, Ichiru's natural hunter abilities --enhanced tenfold by Shizuka's blood-- kicked in instantly.

_Zero's favorite is a pureblood?!_

When a slave was heavily drugged with anti-vampire drugs, their natural abilities were completely inaccessible and as a side-effect, in some cases it could be harder to tell their original rank quickly or on just a fast glance.  
The first time Zero met Kaname, the pureblood had been more drugged and Zero hadn't immediately realized what Kaname was, until they got in the room. Now, however, the amount of drugs in his blood was slightly lower, and Ichiru was much more fast to recognize purebloods from other vampires, due to his frequent visits to Shizuka.

If Ichiru was already curious and in a somewhat cruel playful mood before, now his interest spiked so much higher. He tugged at the end of the leash harshly so that the vampire would get the message and walk, and followed holding onto the little silver chain, looking like he simply wanted the other to walk ahead to watch him, when in truth it was actually because he had no idea where the room was –although it was undeniable that the view from where he was standing now was quite nice, as the tightly fit bondage outfits the slaves of the 'houses' wore really put the focus on the parts of their bodies most likely to interest the customers. Ichiru's eyes were inevitably attracted by a certain part of Kaname's anatomy as they walked, and the pureblood could practically feel the other's gaze burning his skin with each step.

The door of the room clicked behind them, and Kaname was more nervous than before even, if such a thing was possible. He eyed the hunter out of the corner of his eye, suspicious. There was something strangely off. But then, he'd been expecting that if the hunter ever returned, he'd have dropped the mask of gentleness and would behave completely different from before, so it made sense that things would feel strange… it was hard to tell if it was his foolish hopes playing a trick on him or what. Simple logic would completely lead to believe that this was the exact same man, and yet, regardless of what reason might tell him, Kaname hoped that his hunch was the right one instead.

Ichiru examined the other with interest. He was still somewhat angry and confused from his thoughts earlier, and wasn't in a mood that was very safe for anyone to be around. A part of him wanted to see blood tonight, and a pureblood's blood would do just fine. Not that he would ever want to harm his precious Shizuka-sama, but Zero's favorite was a _whole_ different case. The younger Kiryuu twin had far too much pent up frustration in his life, and holding himself back was extremely hard when he was in one of those moods. Lashing out at Zero might have consequences, but lashing out at a slave was hardly something anyone would blame him for, in the current society. The sadistic side of his nature could express itself so much better this way than elsewhere, where he had to play the 'good boy' constantly.

"Take off the stuff you're wearing. We'll continue from where we stopped last time."

_Bingo._ The moment Ichiru finished speaking, he smiled with a lazy look in his eyes, disguising the feeling of victory he got when he saw the expression of horror that had flashed on the pureblood's features for a second. The other had been looking at him with what seemed like uncertain doubt, so Ichiru thought that hinting at a past meeting while remaining vague might in part dispel what doubts he might have, but he hadn't expected to strike a chord so well. It didn't matter that he didn't know what Zero and the vampire might have been doing last time— it was easy enough to guess, and what mattered was that the vampire knew…  
_So there was really something significant that had happened in their previous meeting..._

He knew Zero well, so it wasn't hard at all to guess simple things. The older twin had been in a foul mood prior to his mission, and had returned early one night and had dinner with Yagari and him, after Ichiru presumed his twin had been out at the 'house'.  
He wasn't sure of that back then, but once Zero confessed to having a favorite he visited regularly, the pieces of the puzzle came together and it all became so clear.  
Ichiru guessed easily enough that whatever had happened that night hadn't gone so well, from the way Zero had been acting when he returned. And since Zero had returned considerably earlier than he usually did the nights when he stayed out late, it meant that he might have left something unfinished, hence why Ichiru had worded things that way.

Now it was just a matter of playing his cards right so that his behavior didn't clash with his brother's. He had no idea how Zero behaved around his favorite, but based on the older twin's personality and how well Ichiru knew him, it wasn't too hard to make guesses. Besides, there were ways to cover up for the differences.

"I'm in a strange mood right now… I intend to make up for our last meeting having been so short, but things will be a bit different today…"

_There, another little safeguard so that he can't guess easily…_

With no further words, Ichiru grabbed the vampire by his forearms and tumbled him over onto the bed, appreciating the muffled gasp that the pureblood stifled as he fell, unbalanced and still partially finishing to unclasp the last elements of the bondage outfit he had been removing as the hunter had ordered.

An instinctive rush of panic ran through Kaname's body as he fell back and felt the man climb over him. He pressed back against the mattress instinctively, even though he knew well he had nowhere to escape, and that such a thing wouldn't have been possible even if he did have means to try and run from the other.

_No… no, not like this, please… please…_

The pureblood's mind was lost in a struggle of instinct and reason, a part of him horrified by the fact that visibly, he was about to suffer what he'd almost suffered the previous time, and another part of him feeling strangely detached, as if this was just another customer, just another faceless rape, and not one performed by the person he most feared it from, a fear enhanced so much by the fact that it was the person he'd ended up trusting, the last safe place his heart had had for a short time. _Why did it feel like it wasn't him, then?_

When the hunter's lips and the tip of his tongue connected with the sensitive spot at the junction between Kaname's neck and his shoulder, a shot of heat spiked through the pureblood's body, tearing a little whimper from his traitorous lips, before he could stop himself.

_What was that…?! _Kiryuu-sama had never touched him that way…

Strangely, amidst the fearful horror, there was an unexpected longing, a wistful yearning for something that he didn't understand. _If Kiryuu-sama touched him that way… not this man, but the gentle Kiryuu-sama from his dreams, the one that could never be real… then perhaps it wouldn't be so bad… _Kaname let out an involuntary little moan, failing to stifle the sound fast enough before it escaped his lips. His body was shaking lightly, from a mix of fear, longing, and the sheer intensity of how sensitive his neck was, ravaged by the constant use of the collar or not.

Ichiru chuckled, pleased by the sound and the reaction almost as much as he was by the pureblood's flustered confusion and apprehension. He knew so much about vampires by now, even though he'd never dare touching Shizuka this way. He'd been studying from every material he could find, and unlike most hunters, who wasted their time focusing on how to kill or control the enemy, he'd been exploring… _'more interesting'_ aspects. If he so wished, he could make the lithe body beneath him nearly go nearly insane from pleasure. But then, he doubted that Zero was _that_ good in bed, what with his limited experience and all, so that might throw things off and reveal the truth too soon if he did. He would just keep playing it easy and see how it went.

The vampire was a possession of a brothel after all, Zero could hardly get mad at him for bedding him when countless other people did the same… and if he did get angry, Ichiru was sure he would get his brother to forgive him easily enough. After all, Zero did forgive him anything. It didn't matter what he did tonight or how far he pushed the vampire before revealing he wasn't Zero.

He chuckled darkly and pressed harder against the pale body, parting the pureblood's thighs with his own knees.

Kaname's mind was reeling. _This isn't happening…! This can't be happening!_

But the distinct feeling of something being terribly off just wouldn't leave, and it prompted him to take the risk to make a dangerous move. If he was wrong, his lie would be completely obvious and he would inevitably get badly punished, but he decided to go for it anyway, based on the hunch in his very blood telling him that regardless of appearances, the man pinning him to the mattress wasn't the same one he was used to seeing. He didn't know what caused that feeling, but he couldn't ignore it anymore.

Breathless, he whispered huskily by the other's ear, "Kiryuu-sama, wait… Are you really going to do it with me on my back? You always insist so much to have me on my hands and knees each time…"

He was flustered and flushed enough that it concealed the fear he had that his hunch was completely wrong, masking the lie perfectly even as their eyes met when he spoke.

Ichiru fell for the bait. "I already told you I wanted things to be different today. And how dare you interrupt to ask such stupid questions?! I'm just finally bored of always doing it in the same position."

The words were hard, but he didn't punish the vampire for having spoken out of order, assuming Zero wouldn't, and merely chastised him verbally, the tone of his voice turning into a low purr as his lips hovered around the edge of the pureblood's collar, sending his skin crawling with unwanted delight mixed with disgust.

To the hunter's surprise, the fear in the pureblood had been replaced by a strange calm, the hint of panic in his eyes turned into determination mixed with absolute puzzlement. Kaname looked at Ichiru quizzically, and the younger twin froze, suddenly understanding he'd been had, even before Kaname's lips parted to speak.

"Who are you…? You're _**not**_ Kiryuu-sama. Or at least, you are not _Zero Kiryuu_..."

It was a rather awkward situation, the man still clothed but laying between the vampire's bare legs, them facing one another like that, the question hanging in the air as the slave dared to confront the hunter, something so terribly unthinkable. Ichiru was feeling suddenly terribly stupid for having lost the game at hand so easily. _If only he'd remained vague in his reply, he might have fooled the other a bit longer…_

Ichiru rolled off to the side, getting off the pureblood and sitting up on the side of the bed, running a hand through his hair as he clacked his tongue in a noise of disapproval and displeasure.

The fact that the pureblood knew who he was changed nothing, a vampire had no right to refuse his body to a customer, regardless of who said customer was, and even if such an idea were to cross his mind, Ichiru was strong enough to easily force him. But the fact was, the younger twin found that the game lost its point if the deception was gone from it. He merely made one last attempt to see if there was any chance of the vampire still accepting him as Zero, if not by mistake then out of fear.

"If you'd been a good boy and not played such a stupid game, you could have just laid back and enjoyed it. I would have been gentle and you'd have saved me the trouble to rape you instead."

A bluff, but Ichiru was disappointed to see the pureblood's eyebrows raise slightly, an unconvinced look on his face, apparently not believing the other's words.  
He reached up, running his fingers along the vampire's jaw, the gesture soft but with an underlying tenseness that promised pain.

"After all, what's one more time when we've done it so often already anyway…"

"You can't be him. I don't know who you are, but I can easily see that you're not him."

Ichiru frowned, pulling back his fingers and resisting the urge to backhand the pureblood hard.  
That unwavering certainty unnerved him greatly, because it was the perfect proof that whatever it was, he was missing something that Zero had… something so clearly obvious that even a slave constantly drugged and beaten, and who knew nothing of the two of them, could immediately spot it.

That situation could have escalated into something really dangerous, but Kaname was lucky enough that Ichiru's anger was slowly turning into frustrated weariness, and that he was currently too lazy to do much to him, other than snap at him verbally.

"And how could you possibly tell, _whore_?"

The sting of the insult registered despite how shattered Kaname's pride had been over the years. He knew well _what_ he was, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt to hear it said aloud.

Furthermore, the human's question was dangerous, because Kaname had to answer it, and there was no way he could possibly tell that the way he easily knew that the man wasn't who he claimed to be was because Zero had never slept with him, or because so far Zero had been so gentle to him. Even though he believed that the gentleness was but a mere mask, revealing those two things might cause problems for Zero. Most likely, no one would have believed that the kindness was genuine, but going to a brothel so many times and not sleeping with the slave you rented was extremely strange and suspicious. It might possibly cause troubles for the hunter if the wrong person knew it. Kaname may not know who this man who looked just like Zero might be, but he knew better than revealing dangerous information, even if it was unlikely that anyone would ever listen to what a slave may say. The fact that this person was here and passing himself for Zero was worrisome in the first place.

As it was often the case for slaves, lying was the safest option.

"I knew from the start that you couldn't be him, because Kiryuu-sama is never gentle like that. He's always very violent when he touches me, so… I could easily tell that things were off…"

The words died in his mouth, something in his heart protesting against the lie that in his eyes offended his protector –it didn't matter that said person was unlikely to ever protect him again, or that the lie itself was to avoid getting him in trouble rather than to offend him. _No one would find it shocking for a hunter to be violent against a vampire, so that was the safest thing to say. _

Yes, but Ichiru was gaping at the vampire. Technically, his brother was a hunter, and far from being a hesitant one when doing his job, so he shouldn't have been surprised to hear that Zero was rough with his favorite slave, but… somehow Ichiru's idea of how he guessed his twin might behave with the vampire was so very far from that revelation that he was inevitably surprised by that side of Zero that he didn't know. He'd have suspected the pureblood of lying, if not for the fact that he sounded so convincing and had nothing whatsoever to gain by lying. The possibility that the vampire might be trying to protect Zero was so surreal and impossible that it didn't even cross Ichiru's mind.

Instead, he found himself threading upon a new territory, unexpectedly finding himself feeling slightly guilty. _Did the act that he usually put up, about hating all vampires, somehow influence his brother that way?_

He didn't truly expect that one day he might get Zero to accept Shizuka, but there was a non-reasoning part of him that inevitably felt counter-productive at the idea that he might have caused Zero to be that way, at least in part. _If Zero was violent like that… could it be that he tortured this pureblood as a way to get an indirect revenge against a different pureblood…?_ A shudder of unidentified worry rippled through Ichiru's body at the idea of Zero wanting revenge against Shizuka. He couldn't care for whatever may happen to vampires or even purebloods as a whole, but anything related to Shizuka one way or another, even if it was in a vague manner, immediately concerned him and had quite an effect over his feelings.

The pureblood was sitting nearby, insistently scanning his face and studying his movements, and his gaze was unnerving Ichiru more and more, making him sorely tempted to beat the vampire into looking away. But he lacked the energy, the depressing mood he was sinking in saving the other, for now at least.

He'd lost at his own game, as it would seem this vampire was a far better player than Zero, who was so much easier to fool. _He should have known better than underestimating a pureblood, even one enslaved and so diminished. Ruthless creatures, able to turn the tables at a mind game even when in such dire conditions._

"I'm leaving." Ichiru spoke in a clipped tone, glancing at the pureblood as he did, waiting to see if the vampire showed any signs of victory on his face. If he did, he wouldn't be able to resist any further giving him the beating he was tempted to. But all that he saw on the dark haired pureblood's face was that inquiring puzzlement, and… a strange something that showed on the his features for a brief second before vanishing just as quick.

Kaname had leaned forward, trying to recognize the scent he could very vaguely smell on the other's clothes. He'd noticed it before already, and couldn't put his finger on what it was, although it had seemed strangely familiar, as if he'd smelled it before somewhere, a long time ago. He concealed the curiosity quickly, but his inquisitiveness alone was already visibly irritating the hunter. Ichiru shoved him away slightly, getting up from the bed and glaring down at him, as Kaname was now sitting on the border of the mattress. The grey haired man turned his back to the pureblood as if he was about to leave, with a cruel glint in his eyes as he spoke.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll keep this a secret from Zero."

"…Your visit?"

"No, this."

And with that, Ichiru swung back without warning, his fist clenched, knuckles slamming full force into the side of the pureblood's face, jarring Kaname and sending him crashing back onto the bed, a blinding light searing through his sight before darkness swallowed his spinning mind as he hit the mattress, losing conscience as he fell back.

_Oh, that was faster than he'd expected._ There was no doubt which had the uphand, Ichiru's hunter strength multiplied tenfold by Shizuka's pure blood, or the vampire's weakened body pumped full of anti-vampire drugs and kept constantly exhausted and starved. Despite that satisfaction, Ichiru couldn't help feeling disappointed, as the pureblood offered a far less entertaining target now that he was out cold.

Ichiru cracked his knuckles and simply left, paying no heed to the unconscious body on the bed, uncaring whether the vampire would speak of this or not. Even if he did, it was unlikely Zero would care, he surmised. Especially considering how their relationship sounded a lot less like what he'd imagined.

--

Elsewhere, under the same sky but far from the sparkling lights of the hunters' capital, Zero was looking at the moon, against his most serious intentions wondering once more how Kaname might be doing.

The hunter party had been tracking at fast speed all day long, and had gone into the night without bothering to even make a pause. They'd been gaining on the vampire group, and they had no intention of sleeping tonight and losing any more time. Weariness or not, most of them were growing restless with the long hunt and were eager for some action, on top of being angry at the enemy for having managed to evade them for three days now.

They'd just be stopping for a little while to let the dogs rest and drink some water, but they were going to get back on the enemy's trail shortly, catch up during this night and the next day, and expecting to close down on them before the dusk of the next day.

Zero knew the break they were taking would be short, so he had to be quick. He walked a little farther away from the main group and pulled out his cell phone. By the height of the moon in the sky, he could tell that the middle of the night must be nearing. Which meant his brother must be back from the 'house', with news of Kaname maybe.

He knew it was stupid, but ever since the previous day, his mind couldn't find rest, that strange worry nagging at him. And worse yet, a poisoned wisp of doubt within him was whispering that maybe it hadn't been the best idea to let Ichiru know of his concern for Kaname.  
_But surely, the flesh of his flesh, his own brother wouldn't harm someone he cared for, right?_ He felt guilty for even harboring such unthinkable doubts, and yet, the foolish worry was still there.

His fingers danced on the little number pad of the phone, and he walked a few more steps away, kicking the gravel at his feet to find some form of physical release to the pent up vexation building within him, while he heard the home phone in their apartment ring and ring without response._ Could Ichiru not have returned yet…?_

An icy cold sweat ran down the back of his neck at the possible implication of the visit having taken so long.

Zero had only asked Ichiru to check on the vampire through the glass, he'd never suggested that he go into the brothel. He hadn't even mentioned Kaname's name or the fact that he was a pureblood. The former would imply an intimacy that wasn't good for a hunter, and the latter was something Zero wasn't sure how Ichiru might feel about –after all, their parents _had_ been killed by a pureblood. Zero also felt guilty for having counted on Ichiru's weakness and his past inability to tell vampire ranks apart by sensing their strength, hoping that his twin wouldn't recognize what Kaname was, thinking it was better if he didn't know, considering how Ichiru could be virulent when he talked about vampires.

_But what if Ichiru had noticed…? And what if …_

The phone finally picked up, cutting short the hunter's thoughts.

"Zero?"

"Ichiru! Where were you? It took so long…"

"Where? Well, where you asked me to go. I gotta tell you, that little whore of yours is an _amazing_ lay. If I'd known purebloods were that good to screw, I'd have been frequenting that place since long ago."

The tone of his voice was filled with jest but it also held a clear edge of cruelty in the way he emphasized the word _'whore'_ when he referred to Kaname, and how he spoke each syllable with an undertone of relish, as if he could see his twin's reaction to it, even though they were on the phone.

Zero's fingers holding the phone had gone numb, a rush of ice pouring through his body with the mortification of realizing what he'd caused.

So many people went to that place each night… so many people went _for Kaname_, each night… _Then why was it that it hurt so much?!_

Was it because he had caused it? Or was it for the same reason that he'd felt compelled to stick around that one night when he saw the huge line waiting for Kaname… because the idea of another person touching him was starting to feel unpleasant, as if he wanted to prevent that…?

"Ichiru…"

His throat felt like crumpled parchment when he spoke, in an alien voice that didn't feel like his own.

"Hmm? What?I hope you're not jealous just because I made that slave scream for me a little…?"

"ICHIRU…!!" There was a flurry of emotions in the older twin's voice, and worry and reprobation where not the only ones. Zero had never raised his voice at Ichiru, much less with such an undercurrent of confused anger as he did just now. It was as if he didn't know what to do with the rage he felt, unable to target it at his twin and yet unable to contain it within himself.

_Oh, __**that**__ was unexpected!_ Ichiru couldn't refrain a chuckle of amusement at his brother's expense. If that was all the payback he was going to have from how dejected he'd felt earlier that evening, then so be it… it was quite amusing already.

He laughed, audibly now. "Oh, come on, Zero. I'm pulling your leg, don't you see? I didn't touch your little favorite, although that possessiveness is misplaced when applied to a whore in a brothel. It's not like he's your private slave, you know that well…" The tone of his voice was unmistakably lewd and full of implications, hinting of burning scenes in Zero's mind, scenes of the pureblood being taken over and over by countless men, screaming himself hoarse and sobbing from pain and pleasure, scenes Zero didn't _want_ to picture, but that sent a molten spike of unexpected heat through his groin, making his mind even more confused between the urge to protect Kaname and feel disgusted for his own reaction… and the inevitable urge to do to him the very things that Zero was sure the pureblood would unfortunately not appreciate, not with what so many brutal people had done to him until now.

Ichiru went on "I just checked on him as you asked. He was doing fine, save for a nasty bruise on his face… I'm guessing someone must have punched him pretty hard. Nothing uncommon, as I'm sure you know well."

Was it relief that flooded the hunter now? Or just the mortification of how easily he'd fallen for Ichiru's joke and made a fool of himself, possibly even having showed a bit too much interest in the pureblood as well? The fact that he'd nearly yelled at his brother was also hurting in Zero's over-zealous conscience, his conscience and guilt always far too sensitive when it came to his twin.

"Ichiru, so did you really not do anyth-"

But they never had the time to finish the conversation properly, as the hunters were getting ready to leave again, and someone rushed to call Zero.

The hunter was kicking himself inwardly, both for having sent Ichiru to the 'house' and for having made that phone call right now, when he least could afford to be distracted. He apologized to Ichiru and switched off the phone, but his mind was still rushing through so many worries and thoughts as the hunting party set itself into march again, picking up speed to try and catch up with the enemy group. He only hoped that with luck his thoughts would have calmed down before they reached them and the fighting started. He couldn't afford to be this agitated at the moment when he most needed to concentrate.

Contrary to the estimations the hunters had made based on the speed the vampires had maintained for the past days, the hunting party reached the enemy group the next morning instead of by the end of the day. The vampires had been running not only by night but also by day, not making any pauses unlike the hunters, despite being badly weakened by the poor conditions they'd been living in during the recent years hiding in the ruins. The sunlight was taking a heavy toll on them as well, especially after three days.

The two enemy groups finally clashed at the foot of a large rocky formation; the vampires meant to circumvent it, but were losing more and more terrain, and the hunters quickly cut their exits and forced them into combat.

Those vampires were actual survivors from the war who had never been captured before, not fugitive slaves, so they weren't drugged and still were dangerous enough, but against a large group of well-trained hunters with anti-vampire weapons and weaponized anti-vampire drugs, they didn't last long. The fight was violent and all-out on both sides, but it turned out that a number of the enemy group were women and that they even had children with them, which put them at a complete disadvantage when fighting. Power-wise, when it came to high ranks such as aristocrats and purebloods, the females were as powerful as the males, but physically vampire females were usually much less sturdy than most males, and that group was composed of mere level C's, meaning that they had that physical disadvantage without having any special powers to compensate, since only those of stronger blood like the aristocracy had such abilities.

Superior strength and speed were all that male and female level C's had to oppose the human's guns.

Even so, the vampires gave no ground and fought to the very end, well aware of what would happen in case of capture. At one point, their cornered desperation made that they managed to isolate a part of the hunter group, and some of the ones at the fore-front of the fighting were in serious risk. Instincts taking over whatever thoughts were running through Zero's mind, he fell to the side of Yagari's friend who was leading the group, and defended him with admirable valor and strength. The fight was intense enough that there was no time for stray thoughts, and the young hunter's body and instincts simply took over, dispatching attacker after attacker with perfect reflexes and the flawless aim of the Bloody Rose.

Before they had the time to even stop to think, it was all over, what little had survived of the vampire group being tackled down or beaten into surrender, rendered powerless by the weaponized drugs or by the gunshots using anti-vampire bullets.

Zero stared at the desolated scenery, the wind picking up some of the dust from the dead enemies and carrying it away already. Now that it was over, it felt so strange. He'd fought so well, and while he was doing so, there were no weird feelings or anything indicating that he didn't simply belong there doing what he was doing, as he was supposed to by birth, but now that he was cooling down and thinking of the aftermath, it was… a little strange. A strangeness that had never been there until meeting Kaname.

The hunter veteran he'd been defending put a hand on Zero's shoulder, squeezing with rough fondness, congratulating him for his courage and remarkable skill for such a young age. Zero slightly fazed out, only hearing bits and pieces of what the old man was saying of career advancements and commendations for his valor upon their return. Zero's eyes were lost on a disturbing scene occurring several meters from them, where a smaller group of the hunters subjugating the prisoners were currently pushing one of the vampires among them, after having pulled farther away from the spot where the majority of them were chaining down the prisoners for the trip back.

Feeling vaguely numb and disgusted with the death clinging to everything around them, Zero thanked the old veteran in a hurry and rushed towards the group.

The men were forming a circle, pushing a vampire around as she tried to wriggle out of their arms and failed, only to be shoved from a man to the other as they all laughed. She was growing more and more panicked, her movements erratic and lost.  
As Zero grew closer, he realized what was going on. The vampire, still a child looking no more than 12 at most, was crying for her mother, trying to reach a pile of ashes nearby, tears streaking down her cheeks. She was shaking so hard she was nearly convulsing, and her face was flushed and twisted by her crying and screaming, but that only seemed to fuel the cruelty of the men around, who were apparently still fired up from the fighting and not quite thinking right. At least, Zero would like to think that this was the reason why they didn't realize how disgusting their behavior was. He knew some of those people. He wanted to believe they wouldn't do that in a moment when they were cooled down and thinking straight.

He wasn't so sure of that anymore, the next instant. One of the men, not content of just shoving the girl around, grabbed a handful of the front of her tattered clothing and tore at it. The fabric came apart in an instant, with a sudden tearing noise, and the girl fell to the ground, screaming louder, perhaps realizing what would happen. No vampire was ignorant of the fate their race had suffered after the war. It was all the more reason for the survivors to try so hard to never be found.

The men around her guffawed as she fell to the ground covering her chest. At that age, vampires were already technically sexually mature, but because nature made it so didn't necessarily mean they actually _were_ sexually active or even necessarily knowledgeable in it, and the girl was both ignorant of what exactly might happen, and dreadfully afraid, well aware that whatever it was would be horrible. Her distorted vision of things and child-like assumption that hunters were pretty much the equivalent of the boogeyman made her even more scared than an adult might have been, maybe. She scurried on her hands and knees, trying to crawl away from the men, which only heightened their laughing, cruel boots already flying towards the small form to kick her down and pull her back into the circle. The men argued about who would have first dibs; a fresh victim not yet initiated by the 'houses' was a prized thing. Their arguing distracted their attempts at kicking her, and with Zero's proximity and the girl crawling, she found herself at his feet quickly.

But to her, he was nothing more than just another hunter, and despite the inevitable plea of _"please… please…"_ dying on her lips as she looked up, still shaking and trying to cover herself with her emaciated little arms, the eyes she raised to Zero's face contained no hope whatsoever, only despair and death. Everything she had ever had was lost on that battlefield. She was alone and hopeless, and there was only an eternity of agony ahead of her.

In a moment of horrified lucidity, Zero realized the girl wasn't whispering _"please save me"_, but _"please kill me"_ and he felt something like a vice squeezing his chest. She was no older than he had been when his parents were killed. _Hunters were no better than vampires, if they could destroy lives in such a way just as easily and with no remorse._ They claimed the whole difference lay in the fact that vampires weren't 'people' but 'beasts', but Zero was awfully unconvinced of that, the more he saw. But nevertheless, he was a hunter, and the realization of his race's darker sides splayed so visibly before his eyes was a jarring shock.

One of the young hunters in the group yelled a 'hey!' of protest and reached out, grabbing the girl's hair and pulling her back with a string of obscenities. Another of them laughed asking if Zero was trying to steal their toy. The girl's eyes lost even more life, if such a thing was possible, as she realized that the man in front of her wasn't going to help her, and no one would be coming to save her from the imminent horror. Death was too merciful for a vampire, in the hunters' eyes.

There was a loud deflagration, and the man who'd been pulling the girl by her hair screamed in surprise as he was swallowed by a cloud of dusty ashes, the girl's hair slipping between his fingers as her body vanished.

Zero had fired the Bloody Rose, killing the vampire girl with a single shot to the head.

The other men were cursing at him for spoiling the fun and yelling _"What the hell were you thinking, Kiryuu?!"_ and a number of imprecations, but Zero merely kept a mask of perfect artificial calm and lied, claiming that they were fools for underestimating the enemy in such a stupid manner –amidst the confusion and all, part of them bought easily his claim that he'd seen the girl move her head with intent to lunge and bite the nearest man's arm, and then, the rest of the group more or less fell for the story, not convinced that it was necessary to deprive them of their toy, but feeling stupid enough that it shut them up and they didn't dare say anything against Zero. Pushing the matter further would only ridicule them more.

Zero holstered the Bloody Rose and walked away, his expression perfectly cold, perfectly fake… perfectly devastated on the inside regardless of how fakely calm he seemed on the outside. A part of him died that day.

The part of him that still believed in the good of their race. Their cause might be good, but somewhere along the way, things went terribly twisted, and now, he would have a considerable amount of trouble accepting some things that until then had seemed normal, if a bit cruel.  
He'd all along had doubts, but it was one thing to have idealistic ideas supported by meeting a slave in a brothel, and another to be faced with certain things in the battlefield. You couldn't 'quit' being a hunter, you were born one and there was no way out, but… things would be harder to accept from now on.  
Utterly disgusted with mankind, Zero had only one thought in mind. Doing precisely what he'd been telling himself he shouldn't do –going to see Kaname. It was because of who he was as a hunter that he'd thought that Kaname's company might be a bad thing, but now… the balance of what was proper and not or right and wrong seemed at an odd angle, and he could only think of when he'd finally return to the city.

Yagari's friend gestured for Zero to come over, while on the phone calling the headquarters. Now that there was no longer the need to go on foot to track the enemy's trail, he'd requested a pick-up from the Association, so that they wouldn't have to walk back to the city.  
He was well used to young people still being a bit shocked by larger scale missions and the violence inherent to them, so he didn't hold it against Zero that the young man visibly looked like he was listening only to half of what he was saying. Zero stared at him numbly while the man hit him on the arm friendly and told him he'd spoken of his excellent behavior in combat, when he'd called the Association, and would be putting in some good words for him on his report upon their return as well. In the past, Zero would have rejoiced at the idea of rising in ranks and being able to provide a more secure income for his brother and himself, but now it all felt strangely numb.

The way home was naturally considerably faster than the initial trip, and they reached the outskirts of the capital as dusk was starting to approach.

Everybody was absolutely exhausted, a large part of them already dozing off during the trip back, and while some of the most young and energetic were still looking forward to the triage of the prisoners at the headquarters before they were sold to 'houses' or individual buyers –and the inevitable side-effects of that period while the prisoners were free for anyone to use at will— after such a tiresome hunt almost all of them were just looking forward to dragging their battle-weary bodies back to their respective homes and collapsing on the nearest bed or the closest bed-like surface as soon as they possibly could.

Zero, on the other hand, had no intention to do so. He was driven by a much more urgent need, and rather than even tagging along until the headquarters to drop his weapons and gear etc. with everybody else, he simply asked that the driver drop him off when they passed by the Main Station, and from there he took a quick urban train and then a coach, rushing to the 'blood district'.  
His colleagues would probably have been awed or shocked by his energy had they had known where he was going, but the truth was that he wasn't going there for the reasons _they_ would have imagined, naturally.

He just had a strange, overpowering _need_ to see the pureblood, even if just for a bit. The whole horror of the day was imprinted in his eyes, impressing on him how violent and dangerous this world was, where a slave's life was so utterly worthless and at the mercy of just about anyone. Killing a vampire was like killing a mosquito, people didn't even hesitate or regret… they just shrugged and offered the age old hunter proverb _'killing vampires is no sin or crime'_. So much horror could happen so easily… Still shaken from the little girl's death, Zero irrationally feared that something might have happened to Kaname too. But even without those instinctive fears, he just felt strangely agitated, and needed to see the other, foolish as that idea might have seemed had his head been cool and thinking logically.

It was already dark by the time he got there. Dropping out of the coach and tossing the money at the man while yelling for him to keep the change, Zero ran for the 'house' as fast as he could.

Only the less desirable slaves were left in the display, and even then, not many. Zero let out a curse under his breath and rushed in anyway, making a beeline for the check-in counter and instantly asking "Is the pureblood already reserved?!" before he even acknowledged the salute from the old couple behind the counter.

They were both gaping at him with quite obvious stares, and suddenly he registered that he was still wearing his battle-worn heavy duty combat gear, along with the large duffle bag with his weapons slung over his shoulder carelessly, leaving no doubts about its contents as some of the weapons stuck out partially from the semi-closed zipper. _Huh. No wonder the coach driver was looking at him a bit weirdly._ Normally, those things would have been cleaned and returned to his locked at the Hunter Association before he went anywhere in the city, but he hadn't wanted to waste that extra time and maybe get to the house only by rush-time, risking being unable to see the pureblood.

The man behind the counter gaped for a little longer before stuttering out "He should be cleaning up and about ready again… there was a harsher customer earlier and I'd sent a handler to check things up before sending in more customers…"

"Good, write me a reservation for the whole night please."

Zero nearly made to turn towards the corridor leading to the second story right away, when the two owners nearly squeaked at him in horror, protesting with confused shock and gesturing wildly for him. "Mister Kiryuu, sir!! Sir!! You can't use those things on the merchandise!! There's no way you're going to the room with those weapons!! If you kill him by accident I'll charge you the full price of a replacement!!"

Zero's face fell in embarrassment. _Of course, they had to assume right __**that**__, didn't they?_ But then, considering that they viewed the vampires as nothing more that goods for sale each night, and that it was unlikely that any of his colleagues would go into a brothel's room with anti-vampire weapons for any other purpose than using them on someone… the assumption was hardly surprising.

He dropped his bag to the ground, the heavy thud attracting people's gazes all around even more, and blurted out "Keep those for me until morning, will you?" before signing the check-in slip that the man was handing him already, and rushing in.

He was gone in an instant, and the other customers returned to their conversations, some protesting loudly about_ 'annoying assholes who jump ahead of the line just because they're regulars of the stupid place' _and other such similar things.  
The couple of owners merely exchanged a bewildered gaze and the man commented to his wife, with a hint of impressed manly respect in his voice, "That boy has _AMAZING_ stamina."

--

Kaname stood by the bed, reclasping shut part of his bondage outfit. He was in pain, but the previous customer wasn't quite as bad as the more sadistic ones were. The simple fact that he could stand just fine was a very good proof of that. He had even managed to get clean and ready the room on time, so that when a handler checked on him a moment earlier, he didn't get in trouble, for once.  
On the other hand, he was still worrying and wondering about the mysterious visitor who came the previous night –the one who looked just like Kiryuu-sama, but couldn't possibly be him.

The door to the room opened with a sudden wide swing, startling the pureblood right as Kaname was pondering that question.

Zero stepped in, slightly out of breath, the exhaustion from the day and his constant running from a place to the other to make it to the 'house' as soon as possible catching up with him more and more.

Their gazes crossed and the hunter stepped forward, his movement mirrored in perfect reverse by the reaction from the pureblood; Kaname's features took on a look of undisguised apprehension as he stepped back instinctively, expecting the worst…

"Kaname!!"

…Until he heard the hunter's voice call his name, the one thing no one else knew, the one proof that it was really him... for better or for worse.

Zero breached the distance between them, and even though Kaname was fighting so many fears and worries, and was convinced that the hunter was either there to continue the rape that had nearly happened the previous time they met, or simply to punish him for the lies told to the one who looked just like him...

…Even then, Kaname couldn't help the smile that took over his face when he fell into the man's arms.

.

.

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_[tbc]_

* * *

_The next chapter should be full of fluff… and angst. ...Maybe. Unless my crazy Muses add instead some of the other scenes I have planned. XD;_

_Another chapter title from a song by HIM, as usual. ;)_

_Happy St. Xocolatl's day, everybody! XD Eat tons of chocolate and make sure to give some to your favorite vampire(s)~! *lol*_

__

And w00t, only about ten more days until the next LaLa magazine/next VK manga chapter! (I may be currently busy, but don't worry, I'll make time for the important things, of course. ;D *lol*)

--

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
__On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea:**__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

* * *


	14. Your scent sending shivers down my spine

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 14 — "Your scent sending shivers down my spine."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

**_  
_**_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Chapter 14 is (finally) here, and it's entirely Zero & Kaname~! (And uhm, SO MUCH angst and fluff. XD;; *agonizes from all the angst* *lol*)_

_Sorry for the delay, I was stuck without internet for a while after moving. It sucks, because I had planned to post this chapter before the move so that you'd have to wait less, but in the end I ran out of time and ended up only being able to post now. ^^;_

_But now I'm back and so here's chapter 14~! :D (And it's 14.000+ words. 8D;;;)_

* * *

.

.

_Zero stepped in, slightly out of breath. The exhaustion from the day and his constant running from a place to the other to make it to the 'house' as soon as possible were catching up with him more and more._

_Their gazes crossed and the hunter stepped forward, his movement mirrored perfectly by the opposite reaction from the pureblood.  
Kaname's features took on a look of undisguised apprehension as he stepped back instinctively, expecting the worst…_

"_Kaname!!"_

…_Until he heard the hunter's voice call his name, the one thing no one else knew, the one proof that it was really him… for better or for worse. _

_Zero breached the distance between them, and even though Kaname was fighting so many fears and worries, and was convinced that the hunter was either there to continue the rape that had nearly happened the previous time they met, or simply to punish him for the lies told to the one who looked just like him..._

…_Even then, Kaname couldn't help the smile that took over his face when he fell into the man's arms._

--

So much warmth… it had been particularly cold all day, but Kaname couldn't even feel that anymore, wrapped that he was in the hunter's warmth –it went so far beyond mere body heat.

Zero was holding him tight, as if he was afraid that the slightest passing wind might sweep the pureblood away, or that he might disappear if he let go for a second. Kaname didn't understand what was going on, why the man was there in the first place nor much less why Zero was holding him so gently when he'd been expected the very opposite reaction from him all along. But he wasn't about to complain, _oh no_.  
If anything, the only thing he'd have complained about was that the tight embrace was painfully pressing his semi-naked body into the hard plates of the battle gear that Zero was still wearing, and which, much like body armor, were rather uncomfortable to be squished against, even more so when you had nothing but bare skin and some leather to oppose the hard kevlar plates.  
Kaname was torn between the urge to bury his face against Zero's chest, and the embarrassingly distracting proximity of his neck – not because the pureblood would dare to make a move, but because he was painfully starved, and because the last thing he wanted was to get too close and have the hunter mistake his intentions and possibly snap at him.

The smell of death clinging to Zero's gear and to his very clothes was also unsettling, reminding Kaname very well of what the hunter had most likely been doing earlier that day.

_Why should that be surprising…? What would be more natural than a hunter killing vampires…?_ And yet, inevitably, it sent a shiver through the pureblood, pressed so closely to the body that had been killing others of his species until moments before coming here and holding him so gently.

_When would the hunter change his mind and turn that violence towards him instead…? Surely the pretense of gentleness wouldn't last much longer…?_

But however much inevitable that thought may be, for the time being Zero's behavior was anything but violent. The way his arms held the vampire strongly but gently did all sorts of things to Kaname's desperate heart, so achingly needy and starved for any form of affection and contact that wasn't painful or cruel.

He'd never expected the hunter to be back acting this way, not after the fall-out they had, and especially not after the confusing incident with the mysterious look-alike the previous day.

But Zero was here, and that was all that mattered at Kaname's eyes. If the hunter was willing to play dumb about those things and continue with this game a bit longer, then Kaname would happily indulge and say nothing of his worries nor of what had happened the previous day… However much foolish he knew that was, and however much he may know that he was only making the fall harder for himself, since it would inevitably hurt so much more when it did finally end.

_But all that mattered for now was that it wouldn't end just yet. If there was no way to avoid it, then let the pain come, but let it come later, let it be postponed for as long as possible, even if the cost of such a thing would be so much more suffering later when it did finally happen…_

All that mattered for the time being was that the illusion would last a little longer, that his heart would be able to continue to bask in the delicious sensation of being held gently by someone's arms, almost able to fool himself into believing that this person actually cared, and wasn't just holding him to deceive him.

A tiny choked sound escaped the pureblood's lips, his body protesting the knowledge that he was lying to himself, even as he yearned for the lie to hold, to be able to continue fooling himself a little longer, regardless of how impossible the idea of the hunter actually caring for him had to be.

Zero heard the little noise and snapped out of his partial daze, thinking he'd held the pureblood a bit too hard.  
He'd so unexpectedly needed to see the pureblood, to make sure he was fine… he couldn't explain to himself why it was so important, but it simply was. He cared for what might happen to _this_ vampire, against his best reason. He'd seen him so hurt before, and the violence in the battlefield had awakened irrational fears in his mind, making him rush to the 'house' without even bothering to stop by the Hunter Association headquarters to drop off his gear and weapons with the others. And now he was just so relieved to know that Kaname was okay, that he hadn't been able to contain himself.  
Although he was starting to realize that he may be making the vampire uncomfortable because of what he was wearing, and because of having just latched for him with no further explanation or warning. He pulled back, holding Kaname's shoulders and putting a little distance between them, but he just managed to stare at him unsure of what to say. He'd wanted to explain himself, but trying to figure out _how_ to explain _why_ he'd wanted to see the pureblood or, perhaps even more difficult, to explain the sudden urge he'd had to hold him would be extremely awkward, and in the end, all that came out of his lips was a question that almost sounded stupid in his own ears. "Uhm… are you okay?"

The pureblood stared back at him, a vague flush of mixed embarrassment and apprehension coloring his neck and cheeks in a most attractive manner.

Kaname could feel his own heart racing in his chest and found it strangely difficult to collect his thoughts. He'd nearly panicked for a split second when the hunter suddenly broke the hug and pushed him back, but seeing that Zero was still acting gentle was a bit reassuring even if he was deadly afraid of it just being very momentary.

"I… I'm fine. Thank you… for asking, Kiryuu-sama."

Kaname had made a little pause as he spoke, startled by the hunter's hand coming up suddenly, but all that Zero did was gently stroke his face, his thumb tracing carefully the contour of a large dark bruise on the pureblood's cheek, possibly from a recent punch.

Zero felt the urge to ask Kaname who had hit him so hard, but felt stupid and refrained from voicing the question. The pureblood sported so many bruises so often that one more was hardly something surprising.  
And yet, this one was particularly large and gave Zero a strange feeling, although he wasn't sure how or why. He couldn't figure out anything about it just by looking at it though, and so he simply let his fingers slide down the vampire's face, caressing it softly and gently pulling the dark brown locks of hair aside as he traced little lines down Kaname's neck and onto his shoulders with his fingertips, absentmindedly mapping countless other bruises, some old and almost faded, others new and dark, that the pureblood had probable gotten in the recent days if not this same day, even. A pureblood should normally heal from simple bruises practically instantly, but the anti-vampire drugs made even their healing so much slower, and such wounds could last several days, even if all vampires would still eventually heal faster than a human.

Kaname shuddered softly, not expecting the gentle contact, and afraid of where the hunter's attentions might go if he continued touching him. _Not to mention where his_ own _thoughts were going_… He shuddered again, this time undeniably from pleasure, when Zero's nimble fingers caressed a larger bruise just beneath the edge of his collar. Butterflies fluttered in the pureblood's stomach, and if his heart had been racing before, now it was downright hammering in his chest. Kaname found himself short-breathed, needing to part his lips slightly so that he could breath more easily.

"ahh…"

_Damn it, he shouldn't have made that noise._

The pureblood flushed a deeper shade of pink, afraid that the tiny little sound, halfway between gasp and sigh, would give the hunter ideas or turn him on. But Zero mistook it for an expression of discomfort or pain, and pulled back his hand with an apologetic look. If he'd been less exhausted from the hunt and the trip, he might have noticed that the sound that had escaped Kaname's lips sounded by far more husky and needy than it had been pained or fearful, but the pureblood was afraid of what he was feeling himself, and that apprehension was showing on his face, so the hunter just noticed that fear and didn't see past it.

Zero did, however, finally notice that he was covered in dust and looking like he'd crawled out of hell's sandbox, not to mention that he probably shouldn't be wearing anti-vampire battle gear while holding a vampire in the first place, especially when he wanted to be reassuring…

"Huh, I think I really need a bath."

He was feeling a bit stupid for the obvious statement on top of the whole situation, and hesitated between simply walking into the bathroom or asking the pureblood to prepare him a bath, unsure whether it was okay to just do it himself or not, but Kaname jumped in right on time. "I'll prepare one for you right away, Kiryuu-sama."

Seizing the chance to have a moment to try and recollect his thoughts, the pureblood quickly disappeared into the bathroom, and Zero stood around feeling slightly guilty for making him do it.

Another person would have found it the most natural thing, considering that the status of vampires as slaves made that Kaname had to tend to any of the customers' needs, but Zero was trying hard to avoid falling into such a mindset, afraid that if he accepted it as a natural thing, then sooner or later he might end up feeling like _other things_ may be acceptable as well.

_Things that should never be acceptable, like rape._

Not falling into that mindset seemed like something particularly important after all the horror he'd witnessed recently. If he closed his eyes, he could still see the vampire little girl's face, streaked with tears, and her look of hopeless relief when he'd pulled the trigger and ended her suffering.  
Zero clenched his teeth hard, forcing himself to fight the burning moisture threatening to show in his eyes.

_He really should just go home and get some sleep. _He was worn out and utterly in need of some rest, but he'd already placed a full night reservation on the pureblood, and while he could always cancel it, he really didn't want to leave Kaname at the mercy of the men outside. He was sure that once it was known that he'd left, soon enough there would be a crowd waiting to force themselves on the pureblood, and Zero simply couldn't stand that idea, especially not at the moment. He couldn't accept that any more than he could have stood leaving the vampire girl in the hands of his colleagues, after having seen what they intended to do to her.

A hunter couldn't possibly sleep in the presence of a vampire though, so he couldn't even rest a little here. _He'd just have to pull even more from his reserves and stay awake a while longer._ His exhaustion would have to wait, and so would his need to sleep. He'd probably stick around for a good part of the night, and then, by the time _business_ might slow down a bit at the 'house', he'd go home, sleep a little, and then take a coach to get to the association on time.  
Normally, he used a cheaper method to commute to work every day --coaches and taxis were on the expensive side--, but this way it would be faster and leave him a bit longer to sleep before leaving, so that he could avoid ridiculing himself by falling asleep during the mission debriefing, or, worse, at some point while the mission leader commended him or something like that. His master would kill him if _that_ happened.

He almost chuckled at the thought of such a thing, but the lighter mood was quickly erased by a flash of memory of the mission itself, and of the people –vampires— they'd killed. He was a hunter, he couldn't regret killing the ones who were actively trying to kill them too, but the whole enslaving the prisoners part made him feel utterly dirty and disgusted of himself. He pulled off his protective gear and tossed it down unceremoniously on the nearby divan, making a heap with that, and then with his own dusty clothing, before he walked into the bathroom.

The truth was that Zero didn't really _want_ to sleep any time soon either… he was sure that if he did, he'd see the little girl's crying face in his dreams, and he wasn't looking forward to that, so perhaps spending a few more hours awake winding down in Kaname's company wouldn't be a bad thing after all. He could always face his regrets and the ensuing nightmares later.

Kaname had filled the bathtub with pleasantly warm water, dissolving relaxing bath salts into it and scattering fragrant _sombreuil_ rose petals on the surface of the water, the white petals beautifully matching the porcelain of the bathtub and floating elegantly, filling the bathroom with their entrancing scent.  
The pureblood was fully naked, expecting that Zero would order him to join him in the bath. He was also terribly nervous –from the moment the hunter had voiced his intention to bathe, the pureblood had been certain that the man intended to take him in the bath, and the fact that it didn't happen the previous times they bathed together did nothing to reassure him, especially considering the recent events. He was afraid that the hunter's gentleness today was only to lure him into a fake sense of safety until the bath, and that this might really be the end of the game.

But when Zero entered the bathroom looking utterly dejected, even with the pureblood's senses hindered by the drugs Kaname could still pretty much feel the despondency very nearly emanating from the hunter. And he didn't know why, but seeing Zero looking that way sent a spike of pain to his heart. It should have been the opposite, it should have reassured him because the hunter looked so miserable that it was highly dubious that he'd be in the mood for sex, but somehow knowing that he might maybe be momentarily safe wasn't having the effect Kaname had expected, and he couldn't help but worry instead for Zero and what might have made him feel so down.

Of course, he knew better than asking questions, especially on a subject that was visibly sensitive –the last thing he wanted was to anger the hunter, especially considering his violent reaction last time they'd met, when Kaname had asked about his wounds. So instead, the pureblood did the only comforting thing he knew he could do without putting himself in danger, and stepped to the side, gesturing for the bath.

"Your bath is ready, Kiryuu-sama."

Zero did look a tiny bit better when he saw the inviting warm water, and the petals floating lazily over it. _Oh… _He was a little touched that Kaname remembered that he liked those rose petals in his bath. He stepped in, his aching muscles rejoicing at the much needed warmth.

The bathtub was large enough to be called a jacuzzi rather than a normal bathtub, and took a whole corner of the bathroom, flush with the walls. Kaname slid in just after the hunter, scented body wash in one hand, a pouffy mesh sponge in the other, and a slightly hesitant expression in his eyes.

"Kiryuu-sama , I'll wash your back… if you want me to, of course."

The idea seemed very appealing at the moment, but the hunter didn't want the inequality of a slave servicing a hunter that was implied in the offer, and almost refused, before changing his mind and finding a better idea.

"Sure, but only if I get to wash yours too."

The pureblood stalled for a second, refraining the urge to bite his own lip, wondering if maybe it had been too soon to assume he might be safe in the bath after all, but the hunter's tired voice held no menace or lust, and the offer seemed genuinely innocent, however much impossible that may be.

_But then, Kiryuu-sama was by far completely unusual, so…_

Deciding to worry later when and if something really did happen, Kaname simply poured some of the richly scented soap onto the sponge and begun lathering the hunter's back with it. The sponge was large and he held it with both his hands open flat against it, to better embrace the contours of the other's body, partially massaging the hunter as he washed him.

Zero could feel his muscles practically melting under the touch, tense knots easing away as Kaname's hands slid up his back and over his shoulders in circular motions. It felt good enough for his eyes to roll back from delight as he felt the aches and the tension slowly fading away from his muscles. _Was there anything that pureblood wasn't good at?!_

Kaname was hesitant when it came to get so much closer and wrap his arms around the hunter to wash his front –he was afraid of awakening certain parts of the other's body if he went too low down his stomach—, so Zero took the sponge from his hands, smiling reassuringly and telling him to turn around for him.

Kaname froze for a second before he complied slowly, heart thudding in his chest once more, fighting the shaking in his traitorous legs and the sheer certainty he had of what was about to happen as he turned to face the wall, on his knees in the bathtub, waiting for the man to touch him, sure that the hunter was going to do anything but wash him. Kaname touched his forehead to the wall nervously and pressed both his palms against it, bracing himself for the worst, almost expecting the other to penetrate him without warning –_why else would he tell him to turn around?_

But instead, Zero surprised him once more, by running the cushioned mesh sponge down the pureblood's back with gentle carefulness, avoiding lingering too much on the more bruised areas, letting the sponge dance on his skin without being too rough or getting too close to his lower back, not wanting to give him the wrong idea – it took a near heroic effort actually, for Zero to resist going any lower, or --what would have been worse-- resist dropping the sponge and just cupping with his hands the perfect backside offered in front of him.

Kaname's body was pure delight to see, a perfect balance between mind-blowing angles and curves and a light amount of muscle –perhaps a bit under-developed muscle due to the lifestyle he was forced into, but nevertheless present and distinctly graceful while still indubitably male. His pale skin was glistening with sudsy water, blushed attractively here and there and occasionally shuddering softly when Zero accidentally touched a more sensitive spot of his anatomy as he washed closer to the vampire's neck or other areas.

Zero had washed the pureblood once before in the past, but Kaname had been so terribly out of it back then that it had been impossible to notice some little reactions as well as he did now.

The hunter knew in theory that vampires –especially purebloods— had much more sensitive bodies than humans. In fact, that was one of the reasons why a number of the hunters claimed nature had meant the vampire race to be used for sexual service rather than for anything else.

But it was one thing to know the theory or even the revolting propaganda stemming from it, and another thing altogether to actually realize for himself just _how _sensitive Kaname's nipples were, when he accidentally brushed one as he reached around the pureblood's chest with the sponge. The pureblood had let out a strangled little noise and his whole body shuddered hard in surprise, a deliciously appealing version of a little spasm that had made Zero swallow dry and fumble around with his words as he handed the sponge back and said that maybe they should each wash the rest on their own.

Zero didn't trust himself to go on and not be tempted to see if he could replicate that delightful reaction. And if the pureblood's nipples were already so responsive, how would other parts of his body be… _And then, one thing pushing another…_

Kaname was clutching his chest, shaking fingers pressed tightly over the small pink nub that had momentarily throbbed with pleasure intense enough to make his knees weak. He was breathing shallowly and shivering slightly, trying to will the shameful tingling heat in that spot of his body to shut down.

But ashamed as he may be, he was also bewildered by the hunter once more – Zero's regretful reaction would make one think that he'd _accidentally_ touched and aroused him, which seemed just so impossibly unlikely that Kaname was slightly taken aback. And yet, the hunter seemed sincere, and was careful to not touch him again during the rest of the bath. It clashed once more with everything that the pureblood was used to, leaving him off-balance and unsure of what to think.

Kaname insisted for Zero to take precedence in using the sponge, saying that he wasn't supposed to use one anyway, but Zero wouldn't have any of it, and declared that in that case they would share it, since that way the 'house' wouldn't know and there would be no risk of Kaname getting in trouble with the handlers later.

Very often, handlers snapped at the slaves for no reason whatsoever; or better saying, any tiny ridiculous pretext could be made into a good reason to give a slave a beating, either to remind them of their place or simply out of pure sadism. It didn't help that the handler profession naturally attracted people who already had a visible tendency for violence.  
Of course, not all punishments were mere beatings. In theory, _owners_ had all rights over the slaves, including life or death, but _handlers_ were just hired employees somewhat limited in what they could do… and since slaves in brothels were merchandise for rent, the handlers weren't supposed to abuse them excessively without permission, since that could jeopardize the slave's ability to work and function properly for the 'houses'.  
In theory, at least. In truth, the vast majority of handlers, especially the experienced ones who knew well how the 'houses' worked and didn't fear getting fired for pushing the line, regularly abused their power. Rape was a very frequently used method of punishment, when it wasn't just done for no reason whatsoever other than fulfilling the handler's desires.  
It happened especially often when a slave was found at fault in something, whether the fault was real or a mere pretext, and also rather often when slaves were hurt by the more brutal customers –because then, even if the handlers made the wounds worse, it would be difficult to determine that the injuries hadn't been simply caused by the customers, and since the insurance fees covered a pretty high amount of damage, generally the handlers didn't have to worry about getting in trouble for brutalizing the already wounded slaves.

Kaname being a pureblood made that he attracted a lot more people, especially the most sadistic ones who didn't want to have to hold back to avoid damaging the 'merchandise' too much and having to pay extra if the amount of damage they caused exceeded the amounts covered, so he got hurt _very_ often. As a result, he knew the cruelty of the handlers particularly well, whether they were dishing it on him for no reason when he was hurt, or with supposed reasons each time he did something they didn't like.

On a larger scale, that additional abuse translated into a non-negligible added stress; on the smaller scale of the situation at hand, it just meant that he was very careful not to leave anything out of place if he could, and not to touch supplies that were meant for the customers, hence his insistence for Zero to be the one using things since he couldn't use them himself.

When it came to drying up, Kaname offered Zero a soft plushy bathrobe made of a surprisingly thick and comfortable terrycloth, and when the pureblood tried to just wrap himself in the wet towel they'd both used, Zero insisted for him to wear a bathrobe as well, not wanting him to be cold.  
Kaname tried to explain that those things were meant for the customers and not for the vampires, but he finally relented after the hunter promised to back him up so that no one would complain. Zero had already saved him of getting in trouble in a similar manner in the past, so Kaname knew that the hunter was serious… And a customer's orders were unrefusable by a slave, so he could get away with wearing it if it was due to an order.  
He still couldn't help the automatic worry for what might happen if a handler walked into the bathroom later and spotted two used robes instead of one, but when Zero looked at him that way, wrapping the robe around his shoulders and promising to protect him, it was very hard to resist, whatever his reason or anything else may say. _This man made even the impossible seem normal._

As they walked out of the bathroom and towards the comfortably inviting bed –Kaname's steps faltering slightly as he inevitably wondered if they would just sit and talk like often before or if the hunter would decide that he wanted to do _something else_— Zero broke the ice once more.

"It's a pity, I don't have the chess set with me… But I have a little pocket-notebook and a pen so I suppose we could always draw the grid and play by writing down our moves?"

"Kiryuu-sama…"

The vampire's chest felt tight, and his eyes were burning once more. _What was it about this hunter that managed each and every single time to tear down all his defenses and just leave him wide open, taking him by surprise every single time…?_

He almost felt like crying just from the sheer emotion stirred within his abused heart by hearing the hunter's gentle offer, which also implied that Zero wasn't about to rape him anytime soon, or else he wouldn't be talking about playing chess.

To avoid the man's gaze while he tried to push back the emotion showing in his eyes and in the lump in his throat preventing him from speaking well, Kaname rushed for the little laundry door in the wall, reaching in and retrieving the knight from the chess set, while Zero stared at him curiously, wondering what he went to get.

Kaname had hidden it in a corner there after they'd played together and the hunter had forgotten it behind when he took back the chess set. For days, Kaname had held his breath each time a handler came in to fetch the laundry at the beginning of a new day, but he'd been extremely lucky and there had been no surprise in-depth inspections in the past days, so he was able to successfully hide it without incurring anyone's wrath. In his worst moments of weakness during the house's sleeping hours or when he could have an instant without worrying that someone may come in, he'd pull the little piece of marble out and hold it tight between his fingers to take some strength from it, even if it came with the painful reminder that it was all probably lost. But now that Zero was here, giving it back to him was the best choice. He'd been lucky and it hadn't been found so far, but it was only a matter of time.

He handed it back with a slightly regretful smile, wishing he could have kept it. "The last time we played, you forgot one of your pieces, Kiryuu-sama…"

Zero hadn't reopened the box again after their game, so he hadn't realized it was missing. He was surprised, but there was something more important he needed to address immediately. He put the chess piece in one of the pockets of the jacket on the divan, and turned back to the pureblood.

"They're not '_my'_ pieces, Kaname. It's your chess set, remember? I'm just taking them back and forth for you."

Zero hadn't meant to, but his hand moved of its own accord, as if attracted by the pureblood's speechless look, and he slid the back of his curled fingers down Kaname's face in a gentle caress as he spoke. More and more, he found himself instinctively moving to reassure the other, especially when Kaname had that glint of sadness or fear in his eyes.

He realized vaguely that in some level he wasn't ready to analyze yet, he wished he could remove all fears from this vampire forever, and there was a wave of dismay within him at the knowledge that he couldn't possibly do that, since the 'house' owned Kaname.

Unless…

_Unless he were to do to Kaname what he did to the little girl earlier. _

In a way, he _had_ saved her, because by taking her life he'd saved her from an eternity of suffering –or at least from several centuries or thousands of it at the very least, if things stayed as they were.  
In Kaname's case, it would truly be an eternity, because purebloods lived so much longer than level C's, or even Level B's, of whom the lifespan was already so much longer than a level C's.

And yet, even if killing the pureblood would indeed remove him from this life of suffering and slavery, the idea seemed absolutely horrible to Zero. Simply imagining Kaname's delicate features empty of any expression, his eyes lifeless and without shine, blood dripping down his face from where a bullet from the Bloody Rose would have pierced through his head, an instant before his body rigidified and then shattered into a crystalline cloud of ashes… it was enough to make the hunter feel horrified with himself, utterly disgusted that the thought had even crossed his mind.

A surge of protectiveness towards the pureblood in front of him flashed through Zero's body, and in an instinctive movement, he flung his hands around the pureblood's back and pulled him into his arms, holding him tight against his chest once more.

He didn't know if there was a name to that feeling, but there was no way he could ever put a gun to Kaname's head and pull the trigger. There was no way he could end the beautiful, agonized life before him, however much abused and filled with suffering it may be. Seeing the pureblood's bruised body each time he visited him may twist angry knots into the hunter's gut, but it was still better than ending his life.

Kaname was shivering slightly, surprised once more by the sudden contact, and torn between enjoying it or worrying about the meaning of that unexpected hug, but Zero just went on holding him tight. The urge to touch the pureblood, hold him close, comfort him, feel the warmth of his body against his own was becoming more and more urgent, leading Zero to initiate a lot more contact today than he had so far in previous visits. In part, it was because he was so shaken and had such a strong need to feel Kaname, to see for himself that he was real and alive… but in part it was also because regardless of whatever society and life as a hunter might have taught Zero as he grew up, Kaname was becoming more and more necessary for him. Zero _wanted_ to hold him and touch him more and more, even if he might not have noticed or understood yet that urge. So in a moment where he was particularly agitated, it showed even more visibly.

_Today was really not an easy day. _And it just felt like the pureblood was made of glass, just waiting to be broken into pieces and thrown away, an idea that horrified Zero.

_I don't know if I did right in killing her, but I can't possibly kill you. Even if you were to ask me, I doubt I could do it._

But maybe he did owe him to at least explain a little what was going on.

"A lot of things happened today…well, lately."

"Kiryuu-sama…?"

"Kaname, I... I didn't mean to hurt you last time. And I want you to know that I don't intend to hurt you now either. Don't worry… okay?"

The hunter slid a hand down the pureblood's back in a gentle caress, and the fingers of his other hand lost themselves among the brown curls of Kaname's hair, stroking softly, alternating the caresses on his back and on his head while he held him close but gently, not ready yet to let go even if he didn't know exactly why he so desperately needed to hold the pureblood at that precise moment.  
It just seemed unthinkable that he could have told him that they should forget about this, the previous time they met. Or that he could have been thinking that he should stop visiting the pureblood.

The events of the past days had shaken Zero enough to make him realize that some things were by far not as simple as they may seem.

Some of that was bad, but there were also good sides to it, in a way. At least, in the fact that he now realized just how terrible it would feel to lose Kaname. It may be utterly stupid for a hunter to get so attached to a vampire, but there were far worse things that hunters did, and Zero was finally ready to stop questioning whether some things were stupid or not, and just try to accept that he _wanted_ to see this person, even if it was just to spend some time in his company, regardless of the fact that said person was a vampire, and regardless of the fact that the others would never have viewed Kaname as a _person_ to begin with, just as a _slave_.

_Geez, get a hold of yourself, Kiryuu. He must be thinking you're losing it, with all that hugging going on for no apparent reason. _

But unlike what Zero expected, Kaname seemed to have seen the feeling in Zero's eyes, or perceived it somehow, because he just clung to him accepting the embrace, and not showing any discomfort, fighting his own fears and his paradoxical timidity to hold him back too, if anything just by shyly gripping onto the hunter's bathrobe with his fingers.

"Kiryuu-sama… it's… it's okay."

_I'm not going anywhere._

Even though he didn't go as far as saying what was left hanging, Kaname had hesitated before speaking, afraid of how the hunter might react to his attempt of comforting him, and fearing it might end badly if it somehow offended Zero's pride as a hunter or anything of the such. But Zero just seemed genuinely surprised and even touched that Kaname would try at all, although the two were also rather embarrassed and mutually seemed to decide to drop the subject and move onto the bed, Zero first pulling out his little notebook and pen from the pile of clothes he'd left on the divan.

Kaname sat on his heels by the head of the bed, while Zero went to lay down on his back a little lower. The pureblood had initially pushed the many pillows up together to create a little mountain of them for them to sit with their backs against, as they had in previous times, but Zero had felt like laying down. In a spur of the moment, the hunter ended up resting his head on Kaname's legs instead of pulling down a pillow for that. Now, he was slightly embarrassed for having been so forward, but changing position again would be just as awkward, so he stayed.  
Zero wasn't quite functioning at his best; he'd made it to the 'house' in such a rush because of his irrational worry for the pureblood, but now that he could see that Kaname was fine, exhaustion was catching up with him faster and faster, especially with his body feeling all warm and relaxed after the bath, resting so comfortably on the wonderfully soft bed and even more, on the pureblood's long legs, the gentle scent of roses and soap and cleanliness wafting from his skin and making Zero more and more relaxed and almost drowsy.

They played chess for a while, simply drawing the board on the paper for reference, numbers on one edge of it, letters on the other, voicing their moves aloud and writing them down to not forget, but it was considerably harder that way, at least when done by two people as rusty at playing as they were.

It was especially hard for Kaname, who loved chess but was even rustier than Zero –although the hunter was having more and more trouble as he grew more tired, and the pureblood had to keep repeating the written down list of their previous moves for him each time that Zero remembered the positions of things on their imaginary board wrong.

Perhaps it was especially hard on Kaname because while Zero simply enjoyed the game freely without fretting much if he messed up, the pureblood on the other hand took each mistake as a personal failure, resenting himself and mulling over it with near mortification each time it happened, especially when they were strategic errors or moves that revealed an oversight that he would never have had if he hadn't spent so many years without playing or even being able to exercise his mind at anything similar at all. It wasn't exactly pureblood pride --he hardly had anything akin to pride left-- but a sort of shame born of doubting his own mental faculties and how damaged by the ten years of slavery they might have become.  
So even in a case where Zero had to be reminded of which pieces were still in game or of which moves he'd recently made, Kaname still managed to worry more than him when he was the one making a wrong move... and then worry some more when he defeated the hunter, because winning in such circumstances was hardly a good feeling, when he'd taken so long and nearly lost at one point, despite how much Zero may be sleepy and struggling with the game. _If he could nearly lose against an adversary who could barely remember what move he'd just done or all the pieces he still had in game, what did that say about how pitiful he currently was?!_

It burned to think of it, even though he also deeply enjoyed the game.

And even though Zero tried to reassure him that it was fine, he couldn't stop Kaname from judging himself so harshly with each mistake. Only experience and progressing in the game would truly be able to vanquish the shock the pureblood felt each time he failed colossally or came up with a strategy filled with holes. One thing was sure, with them both so rusty and inexperienced, progressing just by playing would be painfully slow, with no one to tutor them and help them progress more effectively. They both understood that well, but however much annoying that may be, it was still far more enjoyable and better than not playing, especially from Kaname's point of view, so they'd persevere.

The pureblood scanned through the list of moves they'd written down, doing a little post-game analysis of his worse mistakes, while Zero just watched him in silence, wishing he could make the game more enjoyable to for the pureblood so that he could get over those difficulties in a more pleasant manner.

Kaname was trying to remember the board at the different moments in the game to visualize it in his mind –they had written down their moves, but not the positions of all else on the board— to see how he could have played things differently, but he kept being distracted by a little piercing pain in his gums, that had been bothering him since earlier that day. He continued to eye the paper, absentmindedly running the tip of his tongue over the slightly aching gums every so often. It was nothing bad, but when it was already difficult to remember what pieces had been in game back at each moment, it didn't help.

The pain was due to the fact that the fangs had been regrowing as usual, and during the past day or so they had started breaking through again, which meant that very soon, the tips of it would have grown enough to pierce out of his gums and peek out a little… which, in turn, meant the 'house' would soon send him in to get them torn off all over again. Slaves were normally defanged, and the simple sight of the tips of the new fangs peeking out of the gums would be distasteful to the customers, prompting the 'house' to deal with it swiftly, even though there wasn't any real danger of the pureblood turning anyone even if he _had_ been able to bite them, considering how heavily drugged with anti-vampire drugs he was at all times.  
He shuddered, hating so terribly much the procedure and all that inevitably happened in it. Especially since he'd probably be getting his new shots of the drugs on same time --as it happened often enough, which meant that on top of it all, he'd be groggy and slow and the customers would be angry.

If he had control over the growth to manage to hold it back, he would, but his body just automatically regenerated itself, so the regrowth of his fangs each time they were torn off was inevitable, even though it was slowed down by the drugs. Just how his body also always regenerated itself back to the way a pureblood should be, regardless of the fact that it meant he would suffer even more, his body returned to its virginal state only to be desecrated over and over by each new violator as soon as he healed enough.

Although even if he had any means to slow the growth of his fangs down, it would still not save him from the weekly anti-vampire drug shots anyway. The dosage the slaves constantly had in their veins as well as the residual effect of those drugs would have been enough to last several months preventing the use of his powers, even if he didn't get any new shots, but no one wanted to take even the slightest little risk, especially with a pureblood. And besides, having him even more subdued and weak than he would have been without the extra shots was very convenient for them. The pros outweighed by far the cons of him healing so much slower as a result.

Seeing that Kaname didn't seem to be paying much attention to the paper anymore, Zero ended up asking the question that had gone through his mind a number of times until now.

"Hey… why is it that this place is renting you out at the price of a level C, when they could be making so much more since you're a pureblood…?"

It was a justified question – other places had no qualms about renting purebloods at impossibly high prices, that is, the select few high-end establishments which actually did have purebloods, since normally they were almost always private slaves, in part precisely because they were too unaffordable to rent out to a more wide audience.

But justified curiosity or not, Kaname's fingers tensed on the paper, and he couldn't fully disguise the dismay that flashed on his face at the question, that he couldn't hide from Zero.

_The last time you asked this… things ended so terribly badly._

He knew well that there was no way around obeying a command, in the form of a question or not, and while he could always lie… he simply didn't want to lie to Zero, especially not right now, when things had been so pleasant, with the hunter and him enjoying each other's presence so much that Kaname had nearly started to relax a little bit.

But if there was one subject he did not want to go into, it was Ichiou. He couldn't possibly bring himself to explain what had happened to him, or how he'd ended up in this 'house' and on such terms. But he wasn't allowed to stay silent and not answer either.

"I… I really…" He hesitated, almost stumbling on the words as his voice wavered when he tried to say something, _anything_, fearing that his silence would be taken as a refusal to answer and upset the hunter... The memory of their previous meeting and how Zero had reacted was still very vivid.

"It's… it's a very painful story…"

Zero reached forward, and the pureblood jolted, already nervous and even more startled when he felt the hunter's hand on his face. His eyes had been squeezed tight for a moment, and he hadn't seen the movement.

"Shh, it's okay. You don't have to tell me what happened after all."

The caress ended as gently as it started, and the fingers pulled back, leaving a strange emptiness that made Kaname wish Zero had left his hand there, still touching his face. To Kaname's absolute surprise, Zero didn't try forcing things, or demanding that he explain himself. The hunter simply allowed him the privacy of not telling.

It stunned Kaname, who had been expecting anything but that, and who had thought the hunter would pry an answer out of him. Especially considering how suspicious Zero had sounded about his motivations, the last time they had met. But then, things seemed to be so different from then, now.

From the peaceful mood in the air, Kaname had already suspected the hunter wouldn't use violence for it, at least not immediately, but he expected to be questioned with insufferable insistence, or worse, and when it didn't happen, his heart felt so relieved that it flooded with the warmth that he always felt when in the hunter's company, and that even now he was still trying to avoid analyzing too much.

He figured that something had happened to make the hunter feel like being gentle again and act like the previous meeting hadn't happened, even if he had no idea what might have caused that change.  
Or maybe, it was before the previous time that something out-of-the-norm had happened – Zero had been hurt then and had seemed terribly on edge about everything, while now his behavior was the very opposite. The hunter seemed strange today, no doubt about it, but it was a nice type of strange, one that made the man mellow and protective, something that utterly surprised the pureblood, but he wasn't about to complain. Far from that. Instead, he smiled softly, feeling once more unsure of how to reply, and just letting the emotion in his eyes express his silent thanks to the hunter for not pushing him into replying.

Zero smiled back, with a reassuring and somewhat apologetic look, wishing he hadn't asked the question that made the vampire look so uncomfortable. _So there was a painful reason behind it._ One that explained why the pureblood had snapped so suddenly when he'd demanded to know the reason, the last time he'd asked that... Zero felt that maybe he should have guessed it would be the case, but the previous time he was agitated enough that he'd reacted more like a hunter than anything else, at first.

Changing the subject in hopes of finding a less problematic subject, Zero opted for asking an innocent question instead. "Do you ever get cold?"

He'd wondered that before, especially when he saw the pureblood shiver from time to time. He knew that the way a vampire's blood circulated and the speed of blood flow was slightly differently from the way it worked in a human's body, making that even though the vampires' had warm blood like the humans, it didn't do as good of a job at regulating the heat in their bodies –which may or may not be why vampires enjoyed drinking human blood so much, for the momentary warmth it brought them, although Zero certainly didn't want to dwell on that idea now. He merely asked out of concern for the other, knowing how cold it had been lately.

Kaname replied truthfully, glad for the change to a less dangerous subject.

"Not so much during the work hours… well, sometimes I do, but usually…" _Usually much worse things are happening that make being cold or not matter little, _he meant to say, but there was no need to voice the words, Zero could see what he meant in the haunted look in Kaname's eyes, so the pureblood just continued. "It's harder during sleep hours, because they switch off the heating. It's just for the customers, so it only stays on while the place is open. And in the winter, it gets really cold… Especially because we don't get blankets or anything, just the normal sheets and decorative coverlet things..."

It didn't help that purebloods being 'more vampire' than anyone else, they were naturally even more sensitive to cold than other vampires. And Kaname himself was particularly so even for one of his rank.

Back as a child, before the war ended, he'd have mountains of blankets and duvets in his bed to huddle underneath, even though the Kuran manor was very well heated.

Yuuki had been the same, although Kaname supposed that she might be different now since humans were considerably less sensitive to the cold.

Their parents used to have the fire in the fireplaces in the bedrooms lit a while before the end of the night, so that by the time they each went to bed, it would have warmed the rooms even more and the embers would be glowing and spreading their pleasant warmth throughout most of the colder hours of the morning, making the children's sleep comfortable and pleasant in the warm room. Yuuki especially enjoyed the embers because they glowed in a reassuring manner, giving a certain light to the bedroom and grounding her in the reality of its safety if she woke up from a nightmare. Vampires may see in the dark, but that light was a comforting presence.  
Kaname and her often ended up sleeping snuggled up in the same bed, either in his room or hers depending on which they'd been in before going to bed. They'd play with each other's hair for endless moments of innocent delight giggling under the blankets, and fall asleep in each other's arms while chatting of random events of the day. He'd laugh softly when she told him that she liked the embers because when they glowed with an almost reddish hue, they reminded her of his eyes in the dark, and made her feel safe.

_Safe from __**other**__ eyes, mismatched blue and red ones glowing with lustful hunger, that appeared in her nightmares and that eventually came to destroy everything their family had._

The precious memory was broken by the way it all ended, and almost painful to remember now that this world was gone, lost and taken from him forever.

Kaname's one and only happiness was knowing that Yuuki was safe – that was all that still truly mattered, in his eyes. Although that knowledge didn't diminish his worry for her, or his horror at knowing that he couldn't possibly protect her the way he was now. Not to mention his own personal suffering from knowing that she didn't remember him anyway, and that he was condemned to an eternity of being raped and brutalized without ever seeing her again or being able to do anything for her.

Even if he had been free, he felt too tainted to ever show himself before her eyes, and that alone hurt more than he possibly could put in words. He clenched his fists tight, the tips of his nails pressing painfully against the palms of his hands, even though the hunter drugs didn't leave him enough strength to do serious damage even if he'd been able to press harder.

Zero saw the conflicting emotions fluttering on the pureblood's face, and wondered if he'd ever find a non-threatening subject of conversation, after all. It was so easy to accidentally stumble upon something painful, whether directly or by thought association. But then, Kaname's whole life seemed made of pain at the moment, so it was hardly a surprise. The hunter sighed, angry at the 'house', at the way the world was, at so many things, wishing he could provide the pureblood with something that took his mind out of all that horror, even if he didn't really have any safe ground.

The hunter endeavored to find safe subjects of conversation, and they talked for a long time, alternating awkward moments and gentler ones, when the mood got pleasant enough that they even laughed together. Zero found that Kaname's smile in those moments was breathtaking, even if he didn't know exactly why it was so beautiful. Maybe because it was so rare, that his heart swelled in his chest to know he'd managed to cause enough peace for a moment that Kaname would actually smile looking so innocent, even though the sadness never fully left his face.

_All the fools brutalizing him have no idea what they're missing. They'd never see such a thing._

The hunter was as mesmerized by the vampire's beautiful smile as Kaname was by Zero's soft amethyst gaze upon him.

As the night progressed, Zero's lids felt more and more heavy, and even though he struggled to go on talking and stay awake, at some point or another his body rebelled against his intentions and he fell into a much needed sleep, his head still resting on the pureblood's lap.

Kaname stared at him for a few seconds, thinking that maybe Zero was faking it as a joke. His instincts warned him with worry, telling him it must be a test, because a hunter would never truly fall asleep in the presence of a vampire – not even when Zero had watched over him throughout the whole night when he was wounded and semi-conscious after being with Ichiou, did the hunter close his eyes for a second.

But it didn't seem like Zero would be testing him right now, especially not when they'd been having such a pleasant moment together.

_You forget that everything he does for you is just part of the game—_ that painful little voice of his self-preservation instincts would whisper in Kaname's ear. But he didn't want to be reminded of that, especially not now.

After a few more minutes, Zero started snoring very softly, and Kaname almost broke down laughing nervously. Sure, the hunter _could_ be faking the snoring too, but the pureblood was pretty sure it wasn't the case.

Kaname chuckled softly, feeling deeply touched and yet a bit strange by having the other asleep in his presence. _In a way, it was a proof of trust…maybe?_  
He'd seen well that it wasn't that so much as the fact that Zero's body was too exhausted and had finally shut down on him, but still, it touched him that the hunter was aware of his state of exhaustion and had still chosen to take the risk to lay down in the bed instead of simply leaving the 'house' and going home to be able to actually rest. Nothing obligated Zero to stay, but he did anyway, as a way to protect the pureblood, and that made Kaname's heart beat a little faster in his chest.

_Why are you so different from everybody else, Kiryuu-sama…? Or are you really just… so much better at acting and fooling me than all the others?_

The pureblood's long, pale fingers played with a few ruffled strands of the hunter's soft silvery hair, caressing them and brushing them back in place fondly.

It was bittersweet, because the opposite possibilities of gentleness or cruelty and deception that could be behind Zero's behavior made Kaname's heart swell on same time that his throat tightened.

A throbbing in his gums reminded the pureblood of one of the many reasons why a hunter wasn't supposed to be asleep –or vulnerable in any way— near a vampire... The pale neck beneath him, clearly showing between the plushy fabric of the bathrobe, was terribly tempting, especially for one as starved for blood as Kaname was. And he had already tasted Zero's blood and knew well how delicious and powerful it was. The hunter's skin moved softly to the rhythm of his heartbeats and his sleepy breathing, and Kaname squeezed his eyes hard, willing away the burning red that had seeped into them, not wanting the hunter to see him that way if he woke up suddenly and caught him staring at the pulse beating in his throat.

Disgusted with himself, Kaname fought the throbbing in his body, cursing the salivary glands that made his mouth water at the thought of the blood, hating his fangs that wanted to pierce through his gums to claim the body resting so peacefully in his lap. Pressing his own hand against his lips, Kaname bit down to distract himself, trying to will the scent of his own body to kill off the hunger within him and counteract the effects of bloodlust.  
Purebloods didn't lose their mind to bloodlust, or at least they didn't easily do so, so he was hardly at risk of attacking Zero by accident, unless maybe in an extreme case if he were terribly hurt and unable to think properly, but… there was always the danger that the need would be too great and that he'd fall for the temptation of having a taste, his mind making up excuses to justify what his body wanted so badly to do.

_Never!! Never, would I give reason to all the ones who call us beasts. Never would I repay his kindness with such a betrayal!!_

If that kindness turned out to be nothing but lies, then so be it, but he wouldn't land the first blow. Even if it turned out that Zero was deceiving him, Kaname had already more or less accepted the idea that he was being played with, but the pros of being able to enjoy such wonderfully peaceful moments momentarily outweighed in his eyes the cons of knowing that one day it would end brutally. So many people treated him horribly every day anyway… it would hurt so much more when Zero finally did that too, but for the time being, those moments of delight were worth that pain, he thought. Even if it hurt so horribly much also, and even thought he felt so utterly pathetic for being so terribly needy that he would settle for such scraps or an affection that couldn't possibly be real, fooling himself and enjoying it all the same, for as long as it may last.

"I'm such an idiot, am I not…?" Kaname's voice was barely audible when he whispered the words, and he had to lean back slightly, noticing that the tears that had been welling up in his eyes were dangerously close to falling on the hunter's face, which would probably wake him up. Breathing heavily, Kaname cried as silently as he could, occasionally running his fingers through the hunter's hair, reveling in the feeling of the soft strands against his skin and wishing this peace could last forever.

Once he'd calmed down a little, brushing the tears away with the back of his hand even though new ones threatened to well up anew just as quickly, Kaname bent forward carefully, approaching his face to the hunter's as silently and slowly as he could, dreadfully afraid he might wake him up if he moved too suddenly. When he was sure that Zero was still asleep, he got even closer, hovering just above the other's skin, inhaling deeply Zero's scent, trying to commit every detail of it to his memory.  
Kaname's fangs throbbed harder with the proximity of the hunter's neck, now a mere three or four inches away, but he forced himself to ignore the feeling. Instead, he sighed, a hunger for something so much more deep and impossible filling him. Lowering his lips softly, he brushed them to the hunter's, in a chaste and barely-there kiss that lasted just an instant before he pulled back quickly, heart hammering in his chest, breathless from having forgotten to even breath while he was so close to the hunter's lips.

Chaste as it may have been, that kiss was tainted and was an unforgivable touch that he would never have been allowed if the unsuspecting victim had been awake._ But he'd wanted it so much... The first kiss he'd ever truly desired, aside from the innocent ones exchanged with Yuuki as a child._

Even if now he was burning with agonizing guilt from having violated the other's trust and touched the man's pure lips with his own tainted ones. _Who would ever want to kiss someone like him, a slave, a whore that anyone could make theirs at will…?_ It was clear to Kaname that Zero wouldn't have wanted such a thing, and as such, he felt so terribly bad for having done that. And yet… he didn't think he could have resisted the inexpugnable urge to do it, even if he'd tried his hardest. There was only so much he could resist, especially at the end of the rope as he was. His tongue darted out guiltily, to taste his own lips, hoping to find a memory of the hunter's ones there, trying to salvage anything he could from that first –and, he assumed, last— kiss.

He leaned back slightly again, crying harder and not wanting to risk waking the other up. A hand pressed tightly over his own lips to force himself not to make any noise, Kaname sobbed in silence, tears rolling down his cheeks and over the tense fingers covering his mouth.

--

Zero's body was well used to waking up around the same time everyday, to get his gear ready, exercise a bit, shave, check on Ichiru, eat breakfast, and then be on his way for the Hunter Association headquarters. His body clock was well attuned to that rhythm, and so he started to stir around that same time, numbly wondering in his sleep why his pillow didn't smell the same as usual, and why he felt far colder than usual. _Damn, did Ichiru switch off the heating during the night…?_

He made to pull the covers higher, and was surprised to find a brocade coverlet instead of the thicker ones he normally had in his bed. Confusion made his eyes open and he jumped slightly, realizing where he was. His first thought was inevitably the most automatic one, a reaction of shock and worry born from years of instinctive distrust of any vampire, ingrained in him from his very birth as well as his training.

The hunter's surprise startled the pureblood even more and Kaname jolted, pulling his fingers away from the hunter's hair suddenly, a guilty look all over his face. He'd been watching over the hunter's sleep and absentmindedly stroking his hair through the whole night, and the hours had passed without him noticing how long it had been.

Kaname initially couldn't believe that Zero actually stayed asleep the whole night despite his presence, and he was torn between a variety of contradictory feelings –being touched by the accidental trust the hunter involuntarily displayed in staying asleep… being tortured by the temptation of the hunter's delicious presence, or being moved to tears by the bittersweetness of this impossible moment that would inevitably end regardless of how much he wished it to go on and on. Unable to pick just one feeling to focus on, Kaname had spent the night fluttering left and right between all those thoughts, and attempting to distract himself with the innocent touch on the hunter's hair.

Sitting up, Zero realized that unlike the previous night, he was now covered by part of the bed coverlet he'd fallen asleep on. Kaname had apparently pulled the other half of it over him to keep him warm during the night. Not only that, but now that the hunter was more awake, it hit him that they were still in the same position than they were in back when they were chatting the previous night.

He'd spent the whole night with his head pillowed on the pureblood's folded legs.

Zero turned, looking at Kaname in alarm, now no longer because of his initial shock at waking up in the company of a vampire, but because he was concerned for the pureblood.

"You…"

Kaname however had no idea of what was going through the hunter's head, and could only see the worry in his eyes. The pureblood's heart threatened to split in his chest, inevitably assuming that Zero might be be angry at finding himself asleep that way, or maybe even thinking the vampire had done something while he was sleeping. Kaname quickly raised his hands in an appeasing gesture, lowering his head as he explained in a pained voice "Ki… Kiryuu-sama, I swear I didn't do anything, I… I just…"

"You stayed the whole night in that position?"

"…?"

"Your legs…are they okay?"

"Ah… w- well, you were asleep, so..."

_So I didn't want to disturb you in the least._

The pureblood wasn't quite sure why the hunter was asking him about his legs, when he expected him to be asking something else altogether, or worse, expecting him to have done something to punish him and not bother to ask anything. It may not be Kaname's fault that Zero had fallen asleep, but it was still a hunter sleeping in a vampire's presence, something utterly wrong and forbidden.

Zero reached with a hand and poked softly one of the pureblood's thighs. Kaname had to hold in a tiny noise that nearly escaped his lips. His legs were completely asleep, and now that the weight of the hunters head was no longer on them, the blood was rushing back into Kaname's veins, his numb muscles regaining feeling and getting rather tingly. The pureblood sat back, stretching his legs, teeth clenched to fight the deluge of sensation from all his veins and muscles reawakening painfully.

"It must have been uncomfortable…"

"I didn't want to disturb you…" _I never wanted that moment to end._

"I wouldn't have been mad if you had woken me up."

"It's… I… I was happy… that you were here, and… I didn't want the moment to…"

_No… stop now, before you say something stupid and he gets angry._ Tears were burning in his eyes, threatening to betray what he wanted to hide.

Kaname lowered his head, biting his lip and leaving the sentence hanging in the air, but rather than doing whatever he was expecting, Zero simply wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer once more. The hunter's mind vaguely registered that it was maybe strange to have such an urge to hold the vampire, but… having Kaname in his arms felt so good that he wasn't going to bother questioning it now, and if it could also reassure the other, then there wasn't anything wrong with it, was there?  
The pureblood let out a tiny stifled whimper, breaking the hunter's chain of thoughts, and prompting Zero to worriedly ask if he was okay. Kaname blushed, waving dismissively at his misbehaving legs, to indicate that they were still just as tingly and as virulently letting him feel their displeasure for having stayed in the same position all night.

If it had been anyone else, Zero might have felt more awkward to be holding someone like that, especially a guy, but because of the situation and all that he had already seen of Kaname until now… it just felt so eerily natural that the hunter could have stayed that way endlessly and he might not even have remembered or minded that the other was male after all, vampire or not. It didn't seem like the pureblood would have minded to stay in the other's arms indefinitely either. Kaname was so eager to melt into Zero's embrace that the hunter couldn't help but find it adorably endearing.

"Hey…" The hunter's voice got the pureblood to look up, expectantly, and Zero continued "I have to go now, but I'll be back tonight, so don't worry."

Zero felt stupid the moment that _'don't worry'_ left his mouth. _After all, it had been him, the one who had been worried yesterday, hadn't it…?_ And yet, even though Kaname didn't say much, his body language spoke volumes as well, so in a way, Zero knew that Kaname had been surprised that he'd returned, and afraid that he'd leave.

The way the pureblood nervously clung to the hunter's robe when Zero held him, the way his eyes were always so full of uncertainty but on same time of a longing that was so deep that Zero wasn't quite sure how to reply to those looks, before the pureblood quickly averted his gaze… Kaname's whole being radiated the sheer _need_ he felt for someone to hold him gently and not be brutal to him for a bit. He was so starved for any kind contact that the hunter couldn't cease to marvel how even the simplest touch –provided that it was gentle and non-threatening— seemed to go straight to the pureblood's heart. And considering that Zero's protective urges were coming up to the forefront more and more, the hunter felt increasingly compelled to touch the other, although that was also a dangerous thing, because inevitably, Kaname was extremely beautiful and desirable, and even in the most innocent moments of holding him, Zero usually had to make sure his lower waist area didn't touch the vampire so that Kaname didn't notice how the proximity was actually making him hard… not to mention the incessant battle of wills within the hunter, constantly fighting to resist the considerable urge to just ruin all his reassuring efforts and simply bed the sensual pureblood right there and then. Zero wanted to show Kaname that he was different from all the jerks who came in each night. That Kaname deserved to be held by someone in a gentle manner, and to be treated kindly.

In a certain level, maybe Zero wanted to prove –either to himself or to the pureblood, he wasn't sure— that not all hunters were like the experience of them that Kaname had had so far.

And above all other reasons, Zero didn't want to see sadness on that beautiful face that looked so radiant when it smiled.

The hunter got dressed back in his dusty and dirty clothes from the previous day, --making an exaggerated look of disgust as he feigned to shake sand off it, putting an amused smile on the pureblood's face--, and headed for the door.

"See you tonight! Take care."

"You too… I'll be waiting for you, Kiryuu-sama…" _Even if you might not return being gentle like you are now… I'll still be waiting for you, no matter how long you take to return._

There were so many things Kaname wanted to say and couldn't. So he settled for just a few words, and walked the hunter to the door, staying there and listening to his footsteps until Zero went downstairs and he couldn't discern him from the other people walking anymore.

Only then, did Kaname walk back to the bed and throw himself down on it, inhaling deeply the scent of the hunter, removing the bathrobe he was still wearing –it would be bad if he fell asleep in it and a handler walked in to find him wearing something he wasn't allowed to, without a customer around to justify it—, then sliding his tired body between the sheets to float away into a much needed sleep, cradled by the protective presence of the hunter's scent on the bed.

.

Elsewhere, far from the blood district, master Yagari was staring at the locked door of the Kiryuu apartment with a morose look, pondering on why there was no one around to have breakfast with him.

.

Even farther from there, Shizuka was sitting in an ornate fauteuil reading a book while affecting a bored look, as Ichiru stood behind her, brushing her long hair in silence, letting the silky strands slip between his fingers with adoration, while he wondered where in the world his brother may be.

.

.

.

_[tbc]_

* * *

_So sorry that it took a while. On top of being extra-busy lately, I've also just moved to a new place! …which means I'm all bouncy happy with the new place, but it also means I ended up offline for a while. T_T My internet provider blotched the move and so I wasn't able to be back online for a while. Luckily, I'm back now! *almost died of withdrawal*  
(I hadn't had time to go to an internet café instead, so I was really stuck. ^^;)_

_As usual with this fic, the chapter title is from a song by HIM. :D It's a line of the lyrics of "Gone with the sin". :3_

_And about the chapter itself, in case it wasn't obvious, the bruise that caught Zero's attention, on Kaname's face, is the one from when Ichiru punched him hard the previous day.  
If Zero had gone through with his idea and asked who hit him, one could wonder what Kaname would have replied… ;D_

_And it's also both funny and sad that little by little Kaname is making the transition between being afraid of Zero's touch, and actually wanting it or even desiring it… or more exactly, moving from just being plain afraid to being afraid of his own starting desire for it. XD *lol*  
Zero on the other hand, is moving from "lust-&-curiosity" mode to lust-while-feeling-more-and-more guilty-for-desiring-Kaname, and trying to convince himself that he mustn't touch the pureblood that way, not when so many people have brutalized him with it and all… Oh Zero, what will you do if the day comes when Kaname _wants_ you to touch him? ;D *lol*_

_This story has officially reached more than twice the length necessary to be considered a small novel. 8D;;  
I have the whole story planned ahead of time, so I knew it would be long, but… it's even longer than expected, haha. XD;;; *writes too much*_

_I'm so happy that so many people have told me they enjoy the pace of it though, so I'm reassured that it's pleasantly long, rather than annoyingly long. (Hopefully? *lol*) XD; *lol*_

--

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority to survive, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

* * *


	15. While the ice gives way under my feet

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 15 — "While the ice gives way under my feet."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_It's that time of the year again, I have become a melting, tearing up, sniffling, miserable puddle of pollen allergies. Spring is here! XD;;; *lol*  
This is unrelated to the slow update, actually. XD; *lol* That's due to me being still busier, but you'll probably be happy to know that some important moments are coming in the fic, in the upcoming chapters. ;D_

_Again thank you so much to __all the wonderful people who have been writing such lovely reviews~! ^_^/  
Hearing from you all and knowing what you think of the different things in the fic, always gets me all re-energized and motivated to write!! :D  
__So sorry that I haven't been able to reply to the reviews in a while, but I'm still hoping to be able to catch up some time._

_So, sorry for the delay, and thank you so much for your lovely patience! :D *hearts*_

* * *

.

Zero had caught a coach just outside the 'house' –where it had already been sleeping hours for the slaves, and where only an attendant had been at the front desk waiting for him to check out and get his gear back, as usual unable to hide a somewhat admiring look, since they all assumed Zero must have amazing stamina to have been _busy_ with the pureblood all night long.

The hunter made it on time to the Hunter Association headquarters, without anyone knowing that he hadn't simply come straight from home, aside from the fact that he was still wearing the same clothes from the previous day, and for _another_ little detail… The very moment he stepped into the locker room to clean up his weapons and stow his things away before the meeting, the other young hunters gathered there waiting for the mission debriefing too stared at him, a few of them exchanging amused smiles and knowing looks, one or two stifling a laugh.

The lockers where they stored part of their gear had mirrors inside, so Zero quickly opened his and checked what might be wrong … only to realize a bit too late that he had gone to the Association with rather… _interesting_ bed hair, a side effect of Kaname caressing his head for so long while he was asleep. A number of strands were sticking out in completely random directions, having been caressed ad tugged out of place all night long. It wasn't deliberate on the pureblood's part, of course, but it was pretty much inevitable when touching hair for so long.

.

Back at the 'house', Kaname was slightly kicking himself for forgetting to warn the hunter about the random flyaways all over his head, but he assumed Zero would notice or comb his hair before going to work. Too tired to think very coherently about anything, the pureblood just drifted into an unusually peaceful sleep, lulled by the still puzzling safety he felt from Zero's scent on the bed sheets.

.

The post-mission meeting went extremely well, with master Yagari dropping by to see and beaming with pride as the mission leader commended Zero for his valor during the fight. The young hunter was embarrassed and tried to dismiss it as him merely doing his duty, but the older man absolutely insisted that he did it in such an extremely effective and brave manner that he absolutely deserved recognition. At that point Zero could only accept his words and bow to hide his embarrassment as well as the color rising to his cheeks when the whole group exploded in applauses.

In normal times, he'd probably have felt as happy as his master was, if anything just for making them all proud, but now, however much Zero may enjoy seeing the admiration or happiness in the eyes of the ones close to him, it was all dampened by the shadow looming over it –the deaths and suffering of the vampires they had killed or captured in the mission.  
He forced himself to smile at the people congratulating him, but the voices of the captives and the tears of the little girl he shot to save her from being raped were a constant presence in his memory, casting a dark veil over his mood.

And yet, when he walked down the steps and his master smiled at him, the older man's single eye shining with pride and his handshake strong and sincere as he complimented his apprentice, Zero couldn't help but be torn between that guilt and the inevitable pride and joy that came from his master's words regardless of how wrong it may all be.  
A part of Zero was after all, making his parents and his master –who was a surrogate father for him, as Yagari had pretty much raised the twins— proud of him. But that part of him wasn't making _himself_ proud of what he was doing, even if at the moment, he wasn't sure what to feel, torn between pride as a hunter and guilt as a human being.

He wondered, about the other part of him they didn't know about, the part that liked visiting Kaname and who was getting more and more interested by him, a vampire… that part of him certainly _wouldn't _have made his close ones proud.

And yet, _that_ might be the very part of him that was doing what was morally right, if not according to the rules of the current society, at least according to what Zero himself considered to be 'right'.

He was trying not to think of the many moral issues that threatened to assault him constantly, especially when he thought of what would be inevitably happening in more and more missions, seeing how his superiors were pleased with him and seemed interested in offering him career advancements. The idea of countless more vampire victims weighing on his conscience left him filled with doubts that were very much impossible to ever confess to anyone around him since none of them could possibly understand or accept that a fellow hunter was having more and more uncertainties about whether vampires really could be considered beasts, or whether that was as immoral as the slavery that everybody else seemed to find just fine.

_A hunter pitying vampires was a soon-to-be-dead hunter, if he hesitated in a mission. _

Or at best, a hunter soon-to-be shunned from polite society, as the rare oppositionists like Kaien Cross were.

Zero had terrible contradictions warring within him, but he wasn't ready to deal with all of that yet. He shook the thoughts away as well as he could, not wanting to dwell on it all right now, knowing it was better not open _this_ can of worms just yet.

Just how it would be much better that his master or any others didn't find out about his interest for Kaname any time soon, if ever at all.

.

Aside from all that worrying, the day went by uneventfully for Zero. By the end of the afternoon, the young hunter found himself looking forward to the evening eagerly. Whatever thoughts he might have had in previous days about how wrong or weird it might be to want so badly to go see a vampire were now all paling at the face of the joy of knowing he'd be seeing Kaname in a little bit. For now he didn't try to explain to himself the strange attachment he felt for the other, not wanting to spoil that innocent happiness with too much dwelling on it – he was already having enough trouble with the moral issues regarding his job, no need to drag it all even deeper into those private moments as well.

He meant to go to the 'house' as soon as possible, but he had something he wanted to pick up first.

On the light of their recent difficulties with chess and Kaname's frustration over his own mistakes –which the pureblood inevitably regarded as tragic failures rather than simple errors— Zero had been wondering what he could possibly do to improve the level of their gaming, since getting a tutor was out of the picture.

Unbeknownst to most humans until the war, the vast majority of the great chess players of the world had been vampires. Their highly advanced and powerfully analytical minds most often allowed them a vast advantage over humans in such games. As a natural result, countless of the more renowned books on chess were also written by said vampires.  
And like any other books written by vampires, they had been all confiscated and locked away by the Hunter Association after the war. It was considered that books written by vampires might have pernicious elements in it, or –who knows—maybe even subliminal messages or what not. Although a large amount of the population didn't bother using such elaborate excuses to justify their acts, and merely claimed that _'anything written by a bloodsucker was filthy and should be burned.'_

Shortly after the end of the war, there had been countless of those sacrificial pyres, piles of books poured straight into the middle of the street and lit on fire, the ashes flying into the sky, burning symbol of the current era and its zealous excesses against the fallen race.  
People laughed and shouted around the flames, throwing more books into it, drunk with the fervor of the recent victory and celebrating their newly established dominion over the enemy race, as well as the annihilation of the vampire strength and even their culture now.  
It was a frightening sight for enlightened souls, educated people who knew better than judge a book by the race of its author, and who watched in horrified silence as mankind sank a little further down into a new dark age, with each of those fires. In some cases, not even the voice of knowledge dares to speak over the shrill clamor of violent times.

Several copies of each book written by vampire authors still remained in the custody of the Hunter Association's warehouses though, for 'studying purposes', although most of the time almost no one cared for that, as many saw it as nothing more than a waste of time to 'study' an enemy that had already been defeated so deeply and reduced to the worst type of slavery anyway.

So the confiscated books rotted away slowly, forgotten in damp storage rooms, shelves after shelves of them piled up together, with cartons going all the way to the roof in between them.  
The guards of such warehouses cared little for who came and went, considering how low priority their charge was. Worse even, they merrily closed an eye when the younger hunters came by to _'borrow'_ books or –much _less_ frequently, naturally—to return them, for the few who bothered to. The books were low enough priority and existed in enough copies that people virtually didn't really care if they disappeared, which made that far from being an uncommon occurrence.

Chess was by far not the only subject of choice vampires had excelled at or written about... Even long before they had been enslaved for sexual purposes, vampires had always been sensual beings, naturally adept to the pleasures of the flesh and naturally inclined to enjoy sex and write about it. It was no lie that they had bodies even more sensitive to those of humans, and throughout history, a number of them had illustrated themselves as authors among readers who had no idea that these writers were not human. To only mention one of the most famous, the Marquis of Sade was actually a pureblood vampire. But he was by far not the only vampire to become famous for his writings on sexual subjects. The nature of those writers had never been revealed until the hunters made everything public during the war, at the time when the first big waves of captures and ambushes were being made, and the vampire slavery had started.

So when Zero dropped by one of the warehouses and nodded at the guard while pulling out of his pocket his active-duty hunter insignia, the other man just saluted respectfully and let him in, thinking that much like many other hunters around his age, Zero was there out of curiosity or interest for the rather large collection of erotic books.

They never even checked as he left, nor saw that he'd actually taken a book analyzing chess strategy and game play, rather than a saucy one.

Shortly afterwards, said chess book had quickly made its way to an unlikely location to say the least, carefully hidden inside a bag Zero brought to the 'house'.

It was now tightly held between Kaname's marveled fingers, as stared at it in awe and disbelief.

Both of them enjoyed playing chess with each other, but the pureblood had been getting terribly frustrated at his own lack of knowledge, and by how many things he more or less remembered from playing as a child, but had partially forgotten over the years.  
For the longest time, chess had been very far away from his mind, considering how dire his life was and how unlikely it seemed that he'd ever get to play it again. But now, Zero had offered him chances he never thought he'd ever have again, and the pureblood was determined to catch up on the time lost and on the disadvantage that life in slavery had given him.

Kaname's frustration stemmed from the fact that he viewed his inability to play well as a proof of some deep personal failure on his part, as if his mental faculties had been affected by the years spent in captivity and unable to exercise his mind in any way. Deeply rooted fears and emotional scars caused by the things he'd suffered in slavery were the hidden cause of it all, naturally –the insistence of the hunters in vampires living as the beasts they were supposed to be made that the slaves were forbidden to speak unless ordered, and even simple things like knowing how to read or count were highly discouraged and could easily get one in a lot of trouble. Kaname knew both things, as he was already eight years old when he was captured, but even conversing with someone like Zero and him did was difficult after so many years used to it being forbidden.

In a deep, irrational level that he couldn't and didn't want to explain in detail, the pureblood was afraid that his mental faculties might have suffered greatly from being so unused for so many years, even on a level as basic for a pureblood as analyzing a situation and developing a strategy.  
For someone like Kaname, it _really_ was a big deal, and somehow, playing chess well was a way to prove to himself that he hadn't lost _everything_ by becoming what he was forced to be now.

In a nutshell, he feared that by forcing him to live like a beast, the handlers might be succeeding at turning him into exactly what they wanted him to be. Playing well was a way to prove to himself that they hadn't crushed his spirit completely.

But much as Zero wanted to support and reassure him in his attempts, the hunter wasn't exactly a chess specialist either, and could only help so much, so the book would prove to be a great tool to take their play to a slightly higher and more organized level.

Kaname interrupted his delighted contemplation of one of the first chapters to turn his head and beam at Zero with a wonder-filled gaze that made the young hunter's heart feel warm from the joy of knowing he'd been able to give at least that happiness to the beleaguered vampire. The pureblood's face was attractively flushed from emotion and slight embarrassment, and he lowered his head, maybe to hide the blush he was sporting, although it only made his silky brown locks caress the skin of his cheeks, framing his face beautifully and further emphasizing the contrast against his otherwise pale skin. He was so endearing that way that Zero felt a strange lump forming in his throat.

"How… how could I possibly ever repay you, my lo-… Kiryuu-sama…?"

Kaname had caught the fact that Zero always seemed to cringe a little when he called him 'my lord', although he still inevitably slipped every so often, all the more so when he was deeply moved, the emotion making him react on instinct more. It was hard to drop habits beaten into you over a period of so many years, and calling all hunters 'my lord' or 'my lady' was strictly enforced whenever vampires were allowed to speak. Zero ignored the slip-up, simply smiling reassuringly.

"I'm pretty sure we've already covered that subject, Kaname. Anything I do for you I do because I feel like it, so you don't owe me anything. Don't worry about it."

Zero had a tendency to almost shy away from addressing the issue of retribution, always slightly unsure on how to deal with it since he was happy that the pureblood was so taken aback by his gift, but he really didn't want Kaname to feel like he _owed_ him anything. The hunter was always a bit uncertain in how to proceed with those cases, a barely noticeable trace of pink lightly warming his cheeks as he waved off the vampire's profuse thanks.

Kaname looked like a child on Christmas day, flipping through the book with obvious delight painted all over his delicate features. But then, he always looked that way whenever the hunter gave him something, which in itself amused Zero considerably and made him want to cover him in presents.

Kaname was happy enough that he barely seemed to register the pain that had been rather obvious in his features until a moment before.

The hunter hadn't forgotten seeing it, however, and was eyeing the bandages on the pureblood's arms and legs with worry. Rarely did the 'house' ever bother bandaging the slaves' wounds unless they were really grave, so Zero couldn't help the natural worry taking over him at the sight, the very moment he'd stepped into the room.

It didn't help that the uncovered parts of Kaname's body were also a web of bruises and smaller cuts.

In itself, that was nothing new, but today things seemed worse than on your average day. Zero was loath to admit that it wasn't surprising anymore to see Kaname bruised or covered in gashes and cuts of various origins, but the pureblood seemed to have acquired in a mere few hours more or as many wounds as he'd normally get in a full night of 'work'. Normally, Kaname would only be covered in that many bruises by the end of a night, rarely so early on.  
And worse yet, Zero knew it couldn't have been caused by several customers since he'd spent the previous night there in the pureblood's company, so whatever happened to Kaname had to have happened either during the day, at the hands of the handlers, or, more likely, at the hands of the customer that was with the pureblood until a moment before, since Zero's search for the book in the warehouse had made him arrive late after the 'house' had already opened, when Kaname was already busy with a customer.

The hunter had had to wait almost two hours before the man left, and when he got to the room, he found the pureblood looking even more tired than usual, and with unexpected bandages covering various spots on his arms and legs… courtesy of a sadistic customer into knives.

The 'house' wasn't about to let the pureblood take any time off though, so they merely had a handler bandage his wounds while waiting for the bleeding to stop. As usual, they hadn't bothered with the scrapes and bruises, and only the more problematic open wounds were covered.  
The owner would have just let Zero go upstairs right away, as he was convinced that the hunter was into seeing Kaname in whatever state he might be after a customer left, but the clerk that had been manning the desk today hadn't know, and had only called Zero after a handler had already checked on Kaname and patched him up so that he could go on working without displeasing other customers by bleeding on them. So Zero didn't get to see the wounds themselves, but the way the pureblood was obviously in pain as well as the bandages made things rather obvious.

When Zero noticed that on the underside of Kaname's forearms and near his inner thighs, the bandages were slightly reddened by fresh blood still seeping through, he couldn't hold in the worried curiosity anymore.

"Kaname… what happened to you today?"

The pureblood tensed, slightly dismayed that the sight of his wounds should disturb their pleasant moment. He had been so delighted by the book and by the presence of Zero that his mind was working full-force at shoving to the background the horror he'd gone through moments before the hunter arrived. He noticed that his hands were shaking slightly, and set the book down to press his fingers against the bed sheets to try and conceal that additional proof of his state.

Zero had hesitated between not wanting to ask in case it was something unpleasant for the pureblood to talk about, and the inevitable need to know because he was concerned.  
Kaname, on the other hand, was trying to bask in the silver-haired hunter's presence so that he may avoid thinking of the _very_ worrisome promise the brutal customer had made moments before leaving.

The ground was still moist –from when a handler mopped it to wash off Kaname's blood, while a second one quickly wrapped the pureblood's wounds, before they let Zero in— and the dreadful words were very vivid in Kaname's scarred mind.

'_Tomorrow night, my pals and I will come and rent you out for the whole night, and when we're done with you, today will have seemed like a walk in the park, vampire whore…'_

The man had whispered the words into Kaname's ear in a mockingly husky tone, while he held the pureblood by his hair in a painful grip with one hand, and used the other hand to make a short blade dance along the vampire's shivering skin.

Kaname's gaze was lost on the uneven boards of the ground, dark from age or from the years of being stained with his blood, he knew not.  
He sighed heavily and directed Zero a rueful smile before answering his question.

"It's nothing, Kiryuu-sama… Nothing other than the usual, that is."

_It happened so often._

Not that _all_ customers were into torture, but such a large number of the hunters used the 'houses' as an excuse not only to bed the slaves, but also to inflict pain on them. The ones who _weren't_ into a form or another of torture were the minority, actually –and that would be without counting beatings as torture, naturally.  
And because Kaname was a pureblood, and thus healed faster than the average slave even with his body weakened by the drugs, the most sadistic types were inevitably attracted by him and by the possibility to inflict larger amounts of damage without having to pay extra repair fees.

The man who'd come earlier was just one more in a sea of cruelty, but it didn't change the fact that it was still horribly painful to endure, and that Kaname knew well that the next night would be a living nightmare.  
After ten years in that place, he'd grown very used to the different types of customers, and knew well that a _'special party'_, with a group renting a single slave for the purpose of torturing and using him throughout the night, was a dreadful thing. The price for such parties was set higher, because the slave would be servicing many customers at once, and because it was expected that by the time the group left, he'd be in a terrible state, and in need of both blood and time off to heal, which meant a potential loss of money for the 'house' if they didn't compensate in advance by setting pretty high the prices of such special occasions.

All in all, with the right rates everybody benefitted from it… except the slave enduring the torture and the night of horror, naturally. A shudder ran through the pureblood's painfully resigned body— he knew well that there was nothing he could possibly do to escape torture, aside from closing his eyes and hoping he could keep his mind off the pain for a little bit at least.

_At least Kiryuu-sama was still being gentle to him for now, so he could always think of him to try and take his mind off the pain._

The memory of Zero's gentle smile was like a ray of sunshine during Kaname's darkest hours, however much the pureblood was extremely worried about how wide open to this hunter all that left him.

The temptation to speak to his occasional savior of his fears for the upcoming night was big, but Kaname reminded himself that whatever existed between them, puzzling as it may be, was not something that meant he should – or even could— confide in the man. Whenever the urge to open up further reappeared, he inevitably reminded himself that telling Kiryuu-sama his fears or hopes would at best avail to nothing or perhaps even bore the man and give him the idea of ceasing his visits, or at worst, turn against the pureblood and cause him additional pain later down the line, when the hunter inevitably grew tired of the game and decided to drop the gentle act.

Zero may be as gentle as he possibly could, but ten years of horror were far too heavy for Kaname to possibly believe that _this_ hunter was strangely different from the others. The pureblood was far too scarred to easily trust anyone, especially a hunter, after all that he'd suffered for so long.

He trusted Zero against his best intentions, with his heart. But his reason, which commanded what he revealed or not to the other, knew –or thought it knew, at least— that whatever fleeting attachment his savior may have for treating him gently, it could only be a passing fancy, if it even was something like that and not a mere deception. His instincts cautioned him to expect the worst, even when he couldn't help but hope that Zero's visits were motivated not by some cruel intent, but by some unexplainable momentary interest that might be genuine, brief as it would inevitably be.

And yet, even though in the end his thoughts always returned to the inevitability he believed in, that to the hunter it must all be nothing more than a game that was lasting longer than expected… the evening went by in such a peaceful and gentle manner with reassuring chatting, chess playing and bouncing back and forth between the book and the notepad where they were still writing down their chess moves, that as the time for Zero to leave neared, Kaname's urge to confess what was in his mind grew more and more.

The hunter was still tired from the recent mission, and had planned to retire for the night early enough to be able to have some hours of good sleep at home. Despite that, he still made sure to leave somewhat late enough to ensure that a good part of the busy hours of the night were gone, so that Kaname would have some reprieve from the bulk of the customers from the rush hour.  
That gentle attention finished tipping over the balance of the pureblood's heart, and Kaname blurted out, almost stumbling on the words, least his reason took over again and the words died before leaving his lips.

"Kiryuu-sama… you've said before that if I had something I wished to ask of you… I… I could perhaps… depending on what it was…"

The boldness of such a demand only hit him after the words had been voiced, and he stopped in mid-sentence, fingers clenched tight against the top of the mattress he was sitting on, at odds with himself as heart and reason fought yet one more battle in the ongoing struggle that the silver haired hunter kept throwing him into.

_Was it foolish to say such a thing…? Surely, the man must have made that offer in jest…? And by taking it at face value, he was at best a fool, and at worst, deeper ensnared in the other's net, was he not?_

But whether the hunter saw the violent maelstrom of doubt and uncertainty warring inside the pureblood's downcast eyes and the slight quiver of his soft lips, or whether he reacted out of kindness and because his offer had been genuine, Zero simply replied softly "I did promise I would bring you whatever you wanted, provided that it wasn't anything problematic. Don't worry, just tell me, what is it?"

The hunter smiled in encouragement, standing by the bed unthreateningly as he finished straightening up his clothes to leave. The sincerity in those amethyst eyes was such that Kaname's last reserves crumbled and, in a hesitant voice, he confessed, face coloring up from the blood rising to his cheeks in embarrassment and residual instinctive fear.

"I … I wouldn't dare ask you to bring me anything…. But if you meant what you said and wouldn't mind doing something for me, then please, _please_ come tomorrow and… rent me for the whole night?"

The pureblood blurted out the last part in a whisper, his long dark lashes obscuring his sad eyes as his gaze lost itself on the ground. He wasn't really expecting an answer to such a daring plea, and didn't want to look up and see the hunter's face in case Zero displayed outrage or anger at such a bold request, hopeless as it may have been.

Unlike what Kaname feared, however, Zero was merely puzzled and not angry in the least. He'd made the offer earlier that night, as he had the feeling that the pureblood was opening up slightly, and he'd hoped to reassure Kaname more by offering to do something for him. Truth to be said, he'd expected that the pureblood would ask for something such as food, pastries or some other delicacy that he'd noticed that the vampire had an evident soft spot for, and that he could easily bring to make him happy. What Kaname really ended up asking for came in as a surprise though.

Luckily, by now Zero was a bit more skilled at seeing when the pureblood got more nervous, however great at concealing it Kaname may be. As such, he quickly picked up that his silence was making the vampire more and more worried.  
There was something positively rapturous about the pureblood's beauty at all times, but particularly so when those dark eyes momentarily shone almost as if they were wet or feverish, hope and despair warring within him before the entire storm of feelings was swallowed again and his graceful features schooled themselves once more into revealing nothing of the turmoil within, just a submissive resignation that had to be fake or stem from an utterly shattered soul.  
In those moments, just before the maelstrom of feelings was buried again under the pureblood's mask, Zero couldn't help but think that no great painter of the world could ever have done justice to such remarkable beauty, such perfect complexion, striking eyes and luscious lips, such delicate hands, and… such absolutely irresistible, _sinfully_ delicious body…

The contrast between the urge to protect the visibly suffering pureblood, and the immoral raw need to just take what was offered –regardless of whether it was so by Kaname choice or not— was so radical that Zero felt a sudden pang of guilt stab through him.

Snapping out of the tempting thoughts he very much wanted to avoid so that he wouldn't accidentally give in, Zero kicked himself for precisely causing the pureblood's evident worry, and broke the silence that was making him so uneasy.

"Tomorrow? Sure, why not? I will grant you your wish as I promised, although I would like to know why tomorrow in particular."

Zero's mind had initially provided him with a _very_ interesting mind image upon hearing Kaname asking him to spend the whole night with him, but he guessed easily enough that this wasn't what the pureblood had in mind.

Zero could hardly be blamed for having such ideas, when Kaname was so deliciously tempting that it took the most admirable efforts for him to keep his hands off the pureblood and resist breaking all his efforts at reassuring Kaname, by just giving up and bedding him already, not questioning anymore the lust that constantly reminded him of how wonderful Kaname must be in bed.

But tempting and sensual or not, the sheer innocence of the pureblood's gaze for a fraction of second, when he looked up at the hunter, surprised beyond words by hearing him accept, and unable to hide fast enough the adoration in his eyes, as if the hunter was an angel come down from heaven to rescue him just by acquiescing to that simple demand… the pureblood schooled his features once more quite quickly, but that brief sight of such a marveled and innocent gaze had been enough to send countless spikes of renewed guilt through the hunter's heart, putting a momentary halt on the heat once more pooling at the bottom of Zero's stomach.

_How could a single person possibly be both so utterly adorable and so devastatingly irresistible?! It must be a crime to be so beautiful and so terribly sensual and tempting._

At the eyes of many, it _was_ a crime, in a way. To be born a vampire_ was _a crime, nowadays…

Pushing away the thoughts he did not wish to dwell on, thoughts that made him question once more the very morality of being a hunter, Zero caressed the pureblood's hair and cheek softly, breaking Kaname's resistance with his gentle touches and reassurances.  
Finally, in a hurried confession and with cast-down eyes –he was uneasy about speaking of other hunters, afraid of angering his protector— Kaname explained about how the customer that had come earlier that night had been rather violent and had promised to return the next day with a group, for an all-nighter of debauchery and violence.  
If Zero could come early and place a reservation for the whole night, the man and his friends would find themselves forced to go look for fun elsewhere, Kaname added. It would save him from a most unpleasant experience, he concluded without going much into the details of how those types of parties went, and how violent they could often get. The bandages on his body, as well as the horror in his eyes and the nervous way his fingers unwittingly clenched and unclenched gripping random folds on the bed sheets were by far enough to give Zero a very accurate mental picture of what Kaname feared.

And terribly guilty as the hunter may feel about the fact that the mental image of Kaname tied to a bed in an appealing pose was inevitably arousing, Zero's gentle heart was quick to understand the horror the pureblood would be going through at the hands of the men if he didn't come the next day.

Without hesitation, the hunter gladly reiterated his promise of coming the next day, reinforcing it with verbal reassurances and soothing caresses on the pureblood's beautiful bruised face and on his silky hair, marveling at how easy it was to make Kaname happy, and how beautiful the pureblood was when he unconsciously leaned into the caresses, his body automatically surrendering to it out of sheer starvation for any gentle contact, for any touch from the only person who didn't brutalize him.

Zero left the 'house' that day pleased that he'd been able to make the pureblood so happy with so simple a promise, and glad to not have to be at odds with himself for one thing at least.

But however glad he might have momentarily felt, if Zero had known then how tragic that promise would prove to be not even a day from then, he would have refrained from making it.

The very next day –a day he had off work, and which he spent mostly at home— as Zero left his apartment to go early to the 'house' and place a full-night reservation on Kaname right away to ensure that no one else would rent the pureblood for the night, he crossed his brother Ichiru on the stairs, as the other returned home.

Ichiru clung to Zero's arm, insisting that they had barely seen each other lately, what with the older twin's mission and then his insistence in disappearing off to the brothels at the slightest sign of some free time.

A perfectly fake moody pout concealing the perfidious smile that started again as soon as Zero embarrassedly looked away with guilt written all over his face, Ichiru insisted that he'd missed his twin and wanted to spend some time with him, go out to dine and hang out together and have fun or something.

Zero scanned his brother's features, surprised by the offer, but when Ichiru showed nothing but the most admirably composed expression of sincerity and heartfelt brotherly love, Zero could not find in himself the heart to try and get out of spending time together.

Throughout the whole evening, Zero tortured himself back and forth, going from an extreme to another and unable to enjoy the restaurant or anything. At one moment, he would imagine what might be happening to Kaname. At another, he would picture the pureblood in anguish at the broken promise.  
At all times, his eyes were riveted to the clock, not wanting to disappoint his brother by openly mentioning that he wanted to leave early, but hoping that somehow he could perhaps get to the 'house' still on time to be of help somehow.

The evening dragged on, and after a lengthy dinner in an upscale restaurant, Ichiru insisted for Zero to accompany him as he went to see some musicians he knew, who were playing in a café nearby.  
The younger twin almost never included his brother in the very private bubble that music represented for him, so, although it was not Ichiru's own music but some other band's, Zero still thought it might be important for his brother, and did not dare desert him the very moment they set foot outside the restaurant as he had been hoping he might be able to.

The hunter tried to convince himself that Kaname would be fine anyway –eventually, if anything—, and that whatever may happen at the 'house' tonight was after all nothing more than what normally happened before he started visiting the pureblood anyway. Technically, nothing that might be happening was directly his fault… even though his conscience insisted in reminding him of the bewildered look of delight in the pureblood's bruised face the previous day.

But the heights of Zero's guilt were incompatible with the pleasant evening enjoyments that his brother insisted on, and as such, the hunter was forced to lie to himself to rely on the idea that it couldn't be _that_ bad that he didn't go to the 'house', after all. If anything just to keep the guilt under control for the moment, so that he could momentarily put his worries in the background and give his undivided attention to his twin without the worry he was feeling for the pureblood being completely obvious and ruining Ichiru's evening.

Meanwhile, Ichiru was watching that little struggle with great interest, finding his brother as easy to read as ever. He wasn't in the least fooled by his twin's attempts to appear cheerful or to dismiss his inquiries whenever he asked why Zero seemed so distracted.

The younger twin had known where Zero was going that evening the very instant he saw him in the stairs –it was practically written all over his face, at least from Ichiru's point of view, as he knew his brother better than anyone.  
Just seeing that had made Ichiru determined to stop him, for the mere reason of finding out just how important his brother's attachment to the slave in the 'house' was.  
He could see that at least the pureblood had not bewitched his brother enough for him to refuse a request from his twin, but then, he'd guessed that well enough – there was almost nothing that Ichiru could ask of Zero and be refused. The younger twin was fairly certain, and he was passably right in his belief, that Zero would have carved out his own heart and offered it to him, if Ichiru so wished. The brotherly love Zero felt for Ichiru would already have been enough for it, but with the guilt he still felt for stealing his twin's powers before their birth, Zero virtually couldn't say 'no' to Ichiru.

The level to which Zero was troubled by being unable to fly to the 'house' as he had planned to, however, was a surprise to them both.  
However much the hunter claimed that he was enjoying himself, and tried over and over to get into the conversation and so on, Ichiru could easily tell that his twin was terribly distracted, and the way his eyes kept wandering to every single clock nearby was rather obvious. That compulsion to get to the place, along with the worry clearly displayed every so often on the man's face painted a strange picture that clashed with the version of things the pureblood had given Ichiru – that Zero was a regular customer, yes, but a brutal one, who took delight in being cruel to his vampire favorite.

Truth to be said, that story –a lie told by Kaname to protect Zero— had seemed strange to Ichiru to begin with. He'd readily accepted it because Zero was a hunter –cruelty towards vampires was the norm, after all— and because their parents having been killed by a pureblood, Ichiru had assumed that this was why Zero chose another pureblood as his favorite, as an indirect way of taking revenge, if not on the direct culprit then at least on one of the same race.

At that moment, Ichiru had been too absorbed in his worry for Shizuka and what Zero's vengefulness might imply for the future, and hadn't thought to question the brunet's tales.

Now however, as he saw Zero once more glance at his watch with a poorly disguised movement, Ichiru was suddenly wondering if perhaps the situation was not completely different, and if the wretch of a vampire had fooled him completely.  
He mulled over it as they walked from the restaurant to the café, and couldn't avoid the conclusion that if it was indeed the case, then the pureblood had truly made a fool of him.

It explained also how the vampire had known so easily that Ichiru wasn't Zero.

_He'd been had! He'd been had all along and in the most complete manner. By a whore, no less!!_

A spike of fury shot through the vindictive younger twin, at the idea of the brunet possibly laughing at him after he left.

_You play a dangerous game, for one so easily at the mercy of others, whore. But you'll pay very dearly, if you think you can pull such tricks on me._

For the time being, Ichiru decided to watch and wait. He'd rushed into action in a moment of anger last time, and it had led him to foolishness. This time, he would take things much more coldly and effectively, rather than play around and achieve nothing.

So for now, he decided to just wait and see how things unwrapped themselves, taking a certain delight from how worried his brother seemed, which inevitably implied that by keeping Zero around as long as possible, he would be indirectly causing some trouble or another for the pureblood.  
Ichiru revealed nothing at first, until the thought of the pureblood laughing at him combined with the sight of Zero stealing glances at his watch once more finally irritated Ichiru enough that he snapped at his twin and finally displayed some annoyance.

"What is bothering you so badly that you cannot stop checking the time every five minutes? Is the company of your own brother so unpleasant that you can barely stand spending an evening with him without incessantly dreaming of flying back to the arms of your whore at the brothel…?"

Although Ichiru had spoken in a snippy but quiet tone, and close enough that only the two of them had heard it, Zero's face colored on the moment the words left his twin's lips, and he burned with obvious shame, shooting glances all around them.  
Ichiru congratulated himself inwardly, reassured by the sight— he'd initially been worried about letting his brother see his displeasure so soon, but he was sure he'd done well now that he saw the telltale guilt invading his twin's contrite eyes once more. If there was one person who could maneuver Zero at will, it was him.

"You know it isn't that at all, Ichiru! How could you even think such a thing… I… I merely—"

But rather than a well justified outrage, it was embarrassment and confusion that permeated Zero's voice, and his twin easily interrupted him.

"So you were not thinking just now of leaving me alone here and running to the brothel?"

Zero's face burned with even more shame at how direct his brother was being… _and at how right he was_.

He chose silence instead of digging his grave even deeper, as he was unable to lie to his twin— an ability that Ichiru was of course far from lacking, but Zero didn't know that.

Another man might have laughed upon hearing someone speaking to their brother the way Ichiru was currently doing, with possessive recriminations almost akin to romantic jealousy, but while the twins' relationship was entirely innocent in its brotherly nature, the fact that they shared the same apartment and that Ichiru had always been in theory under Zero's protection created a bit of a strange situation, where Zero felt as if he was betraying his family if he spent too much time on his own, as if his very time belonged to Ichiru, as a form of repentance for a past that could never be forgiven, for every single thing Ichiru could have been _if not for _Zero and the incident before their birth. Ah, if only Zero knew that far from being still the weak brother Ichiru had been throughout their childhood, the younger twin was now as powerful if not _more_ powerful than Zero himself. But naturally, he was also very good at hiding it, and so Zero was far from suspecting anything, and went on wallowing in guilt.

So sure Ichiru was of his brother's utter devotion, that he could allow himself a petulance and possessiveness that he wouldn't have tried pulling on anyone else, knowing they wouldn't fall for the same tricks Zero did.

Well disguised and well maneuvered, the complaint seemed motivated by a true feeling of neglect, when in truth, Ichiru had merely been bored by Zero and irritated by Kaname having fooled him.

Caught between these moral Charybdis and Skylla, Zero found himself relapse on both sides, having not only failed to fulfill his promise to Kaname, but having also apparently neglected his poor brother and given him the impression that he was more interested in running to the red light district rather than spending time with his family.

Of course, Zero could hardly explain to his brother the mysterious attraction he felt for the pureblood, or why he felt so compelled to protect Kaname whenever he saw his delicate skin marred by some new bruise. Trusting as Zero may be towards his brother, some sort of deeply instinctual sense of danger and foreboding told him that he shouldn't speak of that to Ichiru, or at least not any time soon.

Zero trusted his brother with his life and was utterly dedicated to him, but the younger twin was after all vehemently against vampires even having a right to live. Zero may not know that this was merely a cover to be able to come and go without risk of attracting attention over Shizuka –in truth, Ichiru didn't really care for the fate of vampires other than her, and would be fine with anything as long as she was okay— but ironically, Ichiru's official position on the subject was what was now making Zero hesitate to confide in him, and thus to reveal his own secrets and the impossible-to-confess turmoil he'd been going through as a hunter.

_Ichiru may not be an active-duty hunter, but he is a Kiryuu, and a hunter at heart. Who knows what he might decide to do if he thinks that his brother is being too soft on a vampire?_

And so, much as it pained Zero to not be completely open with his brother, the same caution that convinced the older twin to keep this matter a secret from Master Yagari also decided him that it would probably be best if he didn't mention Kaname to Ichiru much, if at all. As it was, he regretted having asked him to check on the pureblood that one time, however much he hated keeping secrets from Ichiru.

"Come on, you know that's not the case at all, Ichiru!! I have a favorite in the blood district, yes, but that's just amusement, that's all. It has no importance whatsoever and would never interfere with my family life."

For some reason, the moment Zero said those words, he couldn't help picturing Kaname's face, looking away with his dark eyes filled with sadness. Guilt flashed through the hunter, but he kept it all inside, feeling he'd made things complicated enough as it was, without adding that Kaname was in truth important for him.

Zero's family –which in his eyes, included Yagari— had always been everything for him. Especially Ichiru.

So why did it feel wrong to say that Kaname was nothing more than a mere amusement? Why did it feel like saying that was a form of betrayal as well, just like he'd betrayed his promise to the pureblood by being here instead of protecting him as he'd said he'd do?

It shouldn't matter, should it?

_Then why was it that the guilt would not go away?_

Family was above all other things. He should focus on the moment at hand, and think of his strange paradoxes another time. He should give his undivided attention to Ichiru.

To appease his brother, Zero insisted in spending more time out than planned, until Ichiru himself grew tired of it and decided to finally go home, having had his fun. It was late enough that he didn't really care even if Zero still did try to go to the brothel by now –which, by the way, he was certain Zero would be doing as soon as he stepped into the cab and gave the driver directions to go home. The way his brother stood awkwardly making up excuses for having to go somewhere and being unable to return to their place on same time was rather obvious.

But the whole point of this night was for Ichiru to soothe his boredom and annoyance, as well as to test whether Zero would have had the gall to refuse him or not. For now, Zero had passed the test, although what Ichiru could see of his attachment for the vampire was rather unnerving. _Maybe he would have to do something about it, sometime… _

But for the time being, he would just wait a little longer to see what came out of it.

As Ichiru had surmised, shortly after the cab departed taking him back home, Zero rushed to find a different one to take him to the blood district, and finally made it to the 'house' after an additional half-an-hour of wait –cabs were making themselves rarer so late at night.

He found the place still open, but barely. There was only one handler behind the check-in desk, vaguely glaring at the people still hanging around in the teahouse area. There was no doubt he very much would like to close the place soon and just wait for the last customers busy upstairs to finish with the slaves and leave soon, so that he wouldn't have to stay waiting until the next shift came to relieve him.

The man didn't conceal his surprise at seeing Zero arriving so late.

"Mr. Kiryuu! We weren't expecting you so late. …I was about to close soon, but if you'd like, I could say you had a late reservation and make a little exception."

The last part of the sentence was said in a hushed tone as Zero approached the desk. The man glanced over his shoulder at the other customers as he spoke, visibly making the offer just because Zero was a regular, but not wanting any of the cheapskates to ask for the same treatment and linger there until morning.

Zero had come without really knowing what to expect, and had a little flash of hope at those words.

"I don't suppose the pureblood is free right now, is he?"

At those words, the expression on the handler's face changed completely, and Zero's hope seemed to vanish as fast as the man's features had moved.

"Why, no sir! When is he _ever_ free?!" There was amusement in the man's voice, as if he couldn't help laughing at something funny Zero had said. That feeling died pretty fast the instant he saw the scowl on the hunter's face.  
The handler put on a quick apologetic expression, and proceeded to explain things in a more detached manner, seeing that the customer was not in the mood for joking around.

"I mean, sir, he's busy for the whole night, until closing time. There's a full-night group reservation on him."

As Zero had feared, Kaname was with the group he'd been mentioned being worried about meeting.

"That full-night reservation… can I assume that with enough _determination_ from a regular customer of the establishment, it could perhaps be interrupted…?"

At the word 'determination', Zero's hand slid over the wallet in his pocket, a gesture of obvious meaning that the handler didn't miss.

The hunter felt a bit out of his element, not used to bargaining or bribing anyone, and feeling irritated for not knowing exactly whether he was managing to be somewhat subtle or whether he was just making a fool of himself by being so blatant. From the look on the handler's face, however, it seemed like the offer had been a good one, but there really was nothing that could be done. The man's expression was displaying quite visibly the anguish of knowing the money was so close and yet was impossible to be had.

"I'm _really_ sorry, Mr. Kiryuu," and from the longing looks the man gave Zero's wallet, the hunter was sure he really _was_ sorry, even if not for the same reasons, "but the group paid in advance, and even if they hadn't, there's nothing we could do." Lowering his voice, he continued, for Zero's ears only. "We can let you pass ahead of a line, we can even cheat on the order of people waiting for their reservations, but we can't kick a customer out of a room, no matter who wants them out. You could come back being the very president of the Hunter Association and that rule would still be the same, sir. But if you want any other slave for what little is left of the night, you're welcome to make your choice at a reduced price."

Zero's fingers curled into a fist on the counter, a powerless anger filling him, not knowing where or how to vent itself out.

"No, I… Thank you, but I'll just have a seat at the tea area and wait in case they leave before you close." And, when the man gave him a strange look at his insistence and even refusal of the special price, Zero added with an affected calm "The others just can't live up to him, you know.", and the handler automatically smiled in agreement –something that irritated Zero yet one little bit more, because inevitably he wondered what that man might have done to Kaname before, to know that.

It was tricky, not letting the colossal disappointment show on his face, to avoid seeming far too interested in a slave for it to be normal. But luckily, Zero was good at bottling things in, and the handler was more focused on finishing things up to close soon, so he didn't pay much more attention to the hunter.

Zero sat in the dimly lit tea room, on one of many chairs with wicker back and faded cushions that might have wanted themselves a replica of some luxurious thing, a long time ago, before too many people sat on them and not enough care was taken for the colors to stay proper and fresh. Now it looked like an abused relic of a long lost past, like much of the furniture in the 'houses' and, ironically, like their merchandise, in a way.

The hunter buried his head in his hands, hoping that from afar it just looked like he was tired or sleepy, and that it wasn't obvious how desolate he felt.

It was a handy thing, that vampires would have been the only ones able to perceive the feelings emanating from him, and that even then, they might not be able to do it well nowadays due to the drugs impairing their senses. At least the handlers wouldn't know just how angry he was at himself, nor how much he was berating himself and kicking himself inwardly for not having figured out some way to avoid this.

The thought that it might have been better to refuse Ichiru's invitation, the mere idea of such a possibility, would have been something impossible for Zero to consider before, and yet now he found himself thinking that while he didn't want to refuse something asked by his brother, Ichiru didn't really physically _need_ him around to be safe in any way, especially when just going to have dinner and watch a band playing.  
Kaname on the other hand, was suffering horrors at the hand of a bunch of depraved degenerates because he, Zero Kiryuu, had failed to uphold the promise he'd made him. He clenched his fists hard, squeezing his eyes shut and pressing his hands against his face as if he'd mean to rub his eyes in a sleepy manner, in case anyone looked at him. In truth, he'd meant to stop the inexplicable urge he'd felt to cry, from anger at himself, guilt and worry.

_Crying for a vampire, should be such a ridiculous and impossible thing. But then, Kaname wasn't just any vampire, was he?_

As of now, Zero still couldn't tell what was that weird feeling like a punch to the stomach just at the idea that Kaname might be in pain right now, but it was strangely similar to the feeling that had made him rush to the 'house' the other day to make sure the pureblood was okay, or the feeling that made him want to hold Kaname tightly in his arms so often.

Feelings sure were a strange thing.

--

Upstairs, Kaname was coughing out his own blood and doing his very best not to pass out yet again.

_Passing out was __**bad**__. Passing out angered them and only made things even worse._

The men around him only laughed at his useless attempts to make it less painful, and pressed him down onto the bed again.

--

Far from there, in a cozy little cottage safely nested against the south wing of a large academy surrounded by tall stone walls and thorny rose bushes, a blonde man in his forties was starting another failed pudding for his daughter, so that it would be ready and set on time for her breakfast.

He liked cooking by night, in part because it helped occupy him whenever he woke up in the middle of the night and didn't manage to fall asleep again, too plagued by worries from the past and the future, which his apparent cheerfulness during the day wasn't enough to fully disguise from his close ones.

On some nights, he was plagued by a strange feeling that something was utterly wrong, something visceral, in his very blood, which surprised him since he was perfectly human, and that sort of thing was usually related to vampires and blood bonds.

_Although he _did_ drink Juri's blood, so many years ago, in a far gone past._

The pressing sensation that something was off with his children inevitably always made him get up and rush down the darkened corridor to check on Yuuki, but luckily, he always found her safely asleep in her room.

Although often enough her sleep was as agitated as his, and the next day she'd mention having had the same strange feelings that something was wrong, but without knowing who it was that was in danger.

She just knew it was someone so close to her that she could feel it in her very blood, but she didn't dare believe what her heart whispered to her on the subject, and she never knew how to put her impressions of it into words on her writing pad, so the chairman never realized that perhaps the feeling of danger he had wasn't about Yuuki, but _another_ child that Juri's blood was linked to, and that found himself in horrible situations by night on a regular basis, and that they believed to be dead...

So to this day Cross still hadn't found out why the both of them had those weird presentiments, but it was ever so disquieting all the same, and on those agitated nights he usually got up, both to try and relax while cooking, and because he knew that Yuuki would wake up feeling tired and restless the next day, and so an extra nice breakfast would be most welcome.

A tall slender figure appeared in the frame of the door leading to the corridor of their little house, and leaned her shoulder against the wall, watching silently as she had a natural tendency to.

The chairman turned to her and addressed her a commiserating smile, half sympathizing because he knew she had as much trouble sleeping as him, and half inviting her to come further into the kitchen. Unlike Yuuki and him, she didn't have any of the strange forebodings, but the past was enough to give her nightmares already.

In front of Yuuki, they put up more of a façade, but it was just the two of them, they didn't always bother disguising the sadness that always clung to them. They'd lost too much in life.

Not that Yuuki was any different. In truth, they knew well that she faked her own cheerfulness just as much, to try and not worry them. She wasn't unhappy, far from it, she was surrounded by love and care, but… there was something missing, something far too big for it to not affect her deeply.

They knew exactly what it was, because it was more or less the same thing they both missed, although for each of them it was a little different. It wasn't something as much as _someone_.

"Chairman, the egg whites are not ready to mix with the rest yet."

"Oh, you're right! Oopsie!"

The chairman shot the egg whites a saddened glance before handing the little hand-held mixer to the girl. He'd been distracted and about to mix them to the rest and make a rather strange pudding. She had probably saved him from yet another catastrophic dessert.

"I don't know what I'd do without your help, Seiren."

"Worse dishes, sir." Her reply was short and in her usual martial fashion, but the wry smile on her lips was obvious.

He laughed tiredly, pulling out of the fridge some dough he'd set to rest the previous day. He may have strange cooking incidents, but he had a rather large repertory of things he could cook, or at least of things he enjoyed cooking, even if they had strangely random results despite his many years of experience cooking it. Currently, he was about to start preparing the brioches for the breakfast. Seiren eyed him distrustfully from the corner of her eye, ready to spring if she saw him accidentally drop anything suspiciously inedible in the poor dough.

The chairman was the type of person who felt that homemade would always taste better and better convey his love for his family, even if his family probably would have preferred if he did like most other fathers and just picked up something at the bakery or at the market.

Seiren was getting tired from holding the mixer, but her pride wouldn't let her admit the shaming fact, and she supported her right arm with the other to try and gain some time, hoping the egg whites would reach the right point before her meager forces abandoned her and she had to ask him to finish it.

Things had never been easy, even if she'd gotten more or less used to the anti-vampire drugs over the years. The chairman hadn't wanted to administer them to her, but she was the one who insisted, not wanting to take the risk that they could get in trouble if the Hunter Association ever did a surprise investigation and tested her blood. So she was heavily drugged like any other slave, for the protection of Yuuki and the chairman, even though that was nearly insufferable by making her completely unable to perform her functions as a bodyguard if the necessity was to ever arise.  
_Even if in this current society, she'd probably only get into more trouble, if she'd been able to fight. _

She clenched her teeth hard, her arms almost giving out and dropping the little hand mixer, but after an excruciating two or three minutes of beating, the egg whites had perfectly stiff peaks and were finally ready to fold into the rest of the pudding. She breathed a sigh of relief at the small victory, her hands shaking hard from exhaustion as she set the little machine down. And then turned around, with a look of horror on her face as she was right on time to see the chairman humming innocently while putting large slices of bell peppers into the cinnamon brioches and rolling each into a cute shape before setting them on the baking pan. She shuddered with disgust at the strange mix.

_Must tell Yuuki-sama before she takes a bite. Just in case the combination is lethal or something._

"Oh, Seiren! I made some fresh juice earlier, would you like to try some?"

Her eyes narrowed, little beads of sweat popping up on her forehead as her delicate brows furrowed.

"What's in it, sir?"

"Delicious things!"

"I'll pass, if it's okay, sir."

"But it's my style!"

"All the more reason…"

The chairman immediately produced an exaggerated look of shock and fake hurt.

"My sweet daughter refuses my homemade foodies?!"

"Yuuki-sama is your daughter, lord Cross. Not me." _I get to test the noxious brioches for her though_, she thought , chuckling inwardly.

"You know Seiren, I consider you like my child too, from the moment Kaname told you to live with us and-"

The expression of caustic amusement that had been floating on her face as she'd been refusing the juice melted as if washed away quickly by the torrent of emotion that stormed through her clear eyes in a second, and the chairman immediately regretted having brought up that subject.

Cross was an extremely caring person –a trait he shared with Yuuki, and that was embodied in the urge he felt to adopt anything and anyone in need, making that Seiren usually had to dissuade the two from bringing home every abandoned pet they found in the streets—, but he wasn't the most tactful person ever, and had a knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, with Seiren.  
Maybe it was easier with Yuuki because she loved Kaname in a way that made talking about him bittersweet but delightful even when it was painful, while Seiren loved Kaname with a mix of feelings that was tinged with bottomless guilt.

Even though she'd been acting on his orders when she left him behind and rushed after the chairman and little Yuuki, she would never, _ever_ forgive herself from not having been there when Kaname must have needed her.

They had no idea that the pureblood still lived, having been fooled by reports of his death. At the time, Seiren had been almost completely crushed by the loss. She was never quite the same again, as if a part of her very soul had died with him.  
She knew well that against whatever force must have been strong enough to kill him, she would have stood no chance, especially as a little girl, but she still considered that her duty was to have died in front of him, even if that meant retarding his death of only a few seconds. Pointless or not, it didn't matter – she would never forgive herself for having let him die alone.

After that, she had focused all of her will into protecting Yuuki. She had readily let the chairman fish into her mind and erase the memories he said might be dangerous for them all, so she didn't know _why_ her Yuuki-sama was so important, but she still had the clear memory of Kaname, in the snow, covered in blood, holding Yuuki in his arms as if she was the most important being on the whole Earth, and giving his last orders. Even if she had to be skinned alive, she'd go on following these orders until she let out her last breath.

Even if all she could do to protect Yuuki right now was warn her about strange ingredients in her breakfast.

Even if she lacked the strength to fight anyone to defend her precious charge, or the mere right to accompany her when Yuuki went to school or anywhere else –the official story was that Seiren was Cross' personal slave, a category that, depending on the masters, was a little more fortunate than the slaves in the 'houses', but that society still viewed as nothing more than a sex toy. It would have been inacceptable for her to be going places other than the man's bedroom, much less interacting with his daughter. There would be an outcry.

Cross' activities as a militant demanding that the human rights be extended to vampires made him enough of a target already, they couldn't afford to look like he was being permissive with a vampire slave, or they risked a _lot_, even aside from having the Association step in and take Seiren away.  
Yuuki was still underage, and the government could easily claim that her adoptive father's _'subversive presence'_ was a danger to an young impressionable mind, and send her to a foster home or an orphanage. It was the reason why Cross limited so much his activism in the past ten years, and made sure to never go over the line that would endanger his family.

So Seiren too, had conformed to everything, the drugs, the examinations, all the horrible things that she knew well Cross would have fought tooth and nail to save her from if she'd let him try. She couldn't afford to let him take anymore risks for her. If she was unable to protect Yuuki in any other way than being near her and watching over her when it was just the three of them, then she would do the only thing she could really do for them, and submit to all those things to keep them safe.

Even though it was horribly frightening to be potentially so utterly at anyone's mercy because of the drugs, especially when she went for the examinations.

Even though she hated herself deeply for being unable to do more than just that.

Even though she also hated herself for the fact that even with all that, she was still… _happy_.

She had Yuuki-sama and lord Cross –whom she had always insisted to call that way because he seemed important to Kaname, despite the man's repeated protests and demands to be called 'papa' and other such nonsense—, and she loved them dearly. She knew they also loved her back, something that never ceased to marvel her.

And she hated herself for having even that happiness in a world where Kaname wasn't alive. She held herself to a ridiculously difficult standard, not ever so much as thinking of resenting the other two for the times they were happy, but feeling that it was unforgivable for her to feel that way, when she'd failed to protect Kaname.

Maybe it was also because, while she loved Cross and Yuuki as if they were family –however much she told herself that it was wrong and that she should remain a mere bodyguard caring for her lords— she loved Kaname in a _very_ different way.

No matter how many times she told herself that she was unworthy of feeling such feelings for someone so far above herself –regardless that he was dead, or at least that she believed him to be dead— she was unable to change her feelings.  
He was Heaven and she was Earth. Lowly, simple, and unable to ever reach high enough to touch the clouds above. Even if she could, her touch would only soil his perfection. But the heart didn't listen to one's reason, and much as that only made her feel worse, she couldn't help feeling doubly guilty, because she had not only failed to protect her young lord that she adored above all else, but also… her love.

--

Back in the blood district, Zero still sat dejectedly at the small table he'd been occupying for a while now. His amethyst eyes were tinged with a veil of regret so deep that it would have sent a pang to the heart of anyone seeing such guilt in eyes normally so strikingly beautiful.

The handler from the check-in desk walked up to his table, uncertain as he couldn't quite distinguish the hunter's expression in the dark, and vaguely weirded out by his insistence in waiting there.

"Mr. Kiryuu… the house is closing, it's time to go. Come back any time you want when we're open, but you really need to go now, I have to close everything."

"They're still with him?"

"You've asked me that each time someone left… they are, and I don't know when they'll leave, but it's closing time. You've left late in the morning yourself, you know how it is. A customer can stay as long as they have a paying room. But you don't, and you must go now, sir, please."

_Don't make it any more strange than it already is…_

Zero got up slowly, composing his expression to not reveal the abyss of guilt within, but as he walked out of the door and into the street, it was as if he was carrying the weight of the world on the broken promise weighing on his shoulders…

.

_._

_[tbc]_

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_

_As you've guessed, the chapter title is named after HIM's songs again. ;D *is trying to do that for all chapters of this story*  
This time, it's a line from the song "Under the rose". :D_

_The next chapter should feature some interesting events. X3 *will try to update sooner than lately, is sorry for all the delays in updates lately* ^^;_

_About the chairman's pudding: It was going to be something else initially, hence the egg whites, but then I wanted to change it to custard pudding because of what little Yuuki ate in the manga… only, custard pudding doesn't needs the eggs to be separated, so… it stayed a nameless random pudding. XD  
I want custard pudding now. X3 *will make some sometime when she can find a moment*_

_  
__**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	16. Sleepwalking past hope

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 16 — "Sleepwalking past hope**__.__**" **_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_A bit sooner than you expected it~! :D  
*trying to be less slow with the updates, hopes it will stay this way* XD;;  
Sorry for the delays in the past few chapters!_

_**Warning: Angsty chapter ahead.** This is a period that's pretty difficult for Kaname, so uhm, be warned. XD;;  
But comfort tends to follow hurt, or at least one should hope so. ;D_

_So sorry that I haven't been able to reply to the reviews in a while, but I'm still hoping to be able to catch up some time.  
Sorry for the delay, and thank you so much for your lovely patience! :D *hearts*_

* * *

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_If it had been any __**other**__ night, it would have been nothing new…_

It would have been horrible and unbearable all along, and he'd have gotten scarred yet a little bit more, --mentally if not physically since his body always seemed to manage to heal up eventually, slow as it may be now— but it would have been nothing _new_.

However much horrifically painful it might _normally_ have been, it would never have been as bad as it was that night… because he'd really believed the silver-haired hunter's words, he'd _really_ thought the man would come for him and protect him from the others.

He'd had so much hope, against all reason, and it had all been shattered to pieces when Zero never showed up, and when instead, the group of men who wanted to rent him for the whole night orgy appeared.

Now, the pureblood was inwardly cursing himself for his foolish lack of foresight, doubly unforgivable because, of all people, _he_ should have known better than trust a hunter's promise, with all that he'd suffered in his life.

_He __**should**__ have known. How could he have been so stupid to think that the man had been serious when he offered to help him?!_

_Kiryuu-sama must clearly have meant it as a test… offering to do something for him just to see if he would be bold enough to actually dare asking for something. _

And now, he was being punished for his error, and for having dared to ask the man to come.

Bitterness was washing through the pureblood in place of the rightful anger another might have felt towards Zero for breaking his promise and leaving him at the mercy of the torturers.  
Whether because Kaname was too shaken and because the ten years of violence and horror had left too much of a mark on him and the way he perceived things, or simply because of his nature as a pureblood, he couldn't help but turn that anger against himself first and foremost – he was, after all, the one who had made the colossal misjudgment, and who had believed so deeply in the hunter's promise, allowing himself to be filled with a childish hope despite how much he'd told himself over and over that such things were impossible.

The group of men, who had yanked on his leash harshly all along the way as they took him to the room, leered at him and practically licked their lips now as they circled around him, making Kaname's stomach lurch with the rising panic he wished was not as obvious on his face.

_Idiot, idiot!! How could you be such an idiot?! After so many years, how could you still fall for it and have such stupid hopes?!_

For all he knew, _'Kiryuu-sama'_ might just as well be friends with the men that were currently about to torture him, and the whole thing might have been arranged as a test-and-punishment type of thing.

_He'd already fallen for something very similar before, hadn't he?_

Two times already, men had played such games with him, letting him think they meant to be gentle or even help him, when in fact they'd been deceiving him all along. One of them had even used accomplices to wear Kaname out and to know exactly when to come to the 'house' to have him at his most vulnerable, wounded and desperate, more likely to succumb to sugary words and a fake gentle caress that his abused body craved so badly as a contrast to the constant beatings and rape.

None of them had ever been as gentle or seemed anywhere near as meaningful as Zero in their promises, but their treachery had left an indelible scar in the pureblood's heart, making him have even more difficulties to believe that anyone could possibly ever truly be kind to him. Trust and hope were concepts difficult to grasp for one in such a situation.  
With the slavery itself and the horror that he'd suffered at the hands of all the other customers throughout those ten years, he'd probably be almost as shattered as he was even without these additional betrayals but it did make a difference, by crushing his ability to hope almost completely.

It had been already so difficult for Kaname to trust Zero's intentions… but by breaking his promise this night, the silver-haired hunter had unwittingly dealt a colossal blow to what little had been left of Kaname's hopeful side, if he still had any left of it at all.

Lately, things had seemed better, what with Zero being so unexpectedly nice and caring… Kaname had been tempted to pay no heed to the voice of his instincts, which even now still incessantly repeated to him that opening up to that man would inevitably make his life even worse than it already was.

And now, his instincts had been proven right once more, much to his horror and utter disappointment.

_All along, the hunter might have been waiting for you to open yourself to him and fall for this lie… for you to let down your guard and lose what little you still had left of your soul and your shattered heart._

_Oh yes, he must be amused now. Or at least he will be after his friends report back to him on the wild night spent with you, most likely?_

Lost in the pain, Kaname didn't know what hurt more, the cruel suppositions whispered by his inevitable fears making him assume that Zero was playing along with the men currently in the room, or the physical pain of the hits – one of the men had twisted the pureblood's arms behind his back and the others were jeering and hitting him as they laughed.

He was inclined to think the disappointment hurt a whole lot more than the punches, but that might be because his body was too used to the pain, while his heart had forgotten how to hope, and so being betrayed all over again hurt even more since he had believed too much and let himself too open for the fall.

By the time one of the men threw him down on the bed and another went for the restraints, while a third one pulled out torture instruments from a bag and the rest just laughed and sneered at him, Kaname was zoning out, as much to try to phase out the imminent pain, and to try and cling to his very last hope: that Zero wouldn't be joining the men tonight. That would have been the last blow to destroy him, and in his belief that they might be accomplices he was utterly afraid that it might come to happen.

Almost unwittingly, among a cry of pain when one of the men punched him viciously in the stomach and another one pinned his arms to the bed painfully, a broken _"why…?!"_ came rolling past the pureblood's quivering lips, nearly audible as he was quickly getting breathless and the question came out more like a whisper than anything.

But in the silence of the room, the group of men heard it clearly, and broke into cruel, raucous laughter.

The pureblood realized he'd spoken aloud only too late, but the men didn't know that he meant to ask Zero _'why did you even bother giving me this fake hope if you planned to abandon me like this?'_

They merely thought he was asking _them_ why they felt the need to hurt him, naturally. So with brutish vulgarity and unchecked violence, they reminded him over and over of why hunters and men in general felt the need to do such things. And the cruelty of their words etched itself with a searing pain in the pureblood's mind.

'_Because you're nothing but filth! You're a vampire, that's what vampires are for!! You're born for it, you have only yourself and your parents to blame, for giving birth to such a monster…'_

'_No one would ever want you for anything other than using you and then discarding you like the trash you are!'_

'_You deserve it, always have, and always will!'_

'_It will never be different. You'll always be a vampire, and as such, there will never be anything else but this in your life!!'_

'_You exist just to be a slave and a whore for whoever feels like using you!'_

The words rang loudly in the void of the pureblood's fading consciousness, tearing at what was left of his heart and sanity, and he found himself falling fast over the edge of a horrible nightmare from which it was impossible to wake up, because awake or unconscious… one couldn't escape the reality they lived in.

In the end Zero didn't show up, because by then he was with Ichiru, and later, waiting fruitlessly at the 'house', unable to go upstairs and despairing about having broken his promise to the beleaguered pureblood.

Kaname was unaware of what had happened, however, and just thought that perhaps the reason why Zero hadn't shown up along _with_ the other men was because perhaps he wanted to prolong the game a little longer, and wouldn't show himself this way just yet.

He was painfully relieved that at least Zero hadn't joined them as he'd dreaded, but he couldn't bring himself to hope anymore.  
And that was only when the pureblood could still even conjecture on the subject rationally. By the end of the night, rational thought had become impossible, and all he could do was hoarsely sob out choked breaths, his chest heaving, his body too exhausted and too deeply damaged for him to even retain the energy to cry out in pain after losing his voice from screaming throughout the whole night.

The group was pretty tired by then, having exacted their sadism on the vampire for hours, sexually and in the form of plain torture, and they were starting to run out of ideas of what to do to him, and of stamina to go on with it. Kaname was tied to the bed still, panting softly for lack of energy to even try and breathe deeper. He was too busy trying to focus was little self-awareness he still had in the attempt to keep his head at an angle where he wouldn't drown in his own blood that was pooling in the back of his throat and choking him every so often.  
Any other vampire would find his blood the ultimate delight, but for him, it was nothing more than an inconvenience, presently.

Even with all this horror, he knew well that he was lucky enough: sadistic as they may be, the group of men didn't know him personally, so they couldn't deal the type of damage Ichiou could, for example. And even for normal customers into more extreme stuff, they had brought only a limited amount of tools. He'd had past run-ins with groups that had brought _far_ better equipment and were able to do far worse things to him.  
Especially the ones who brought bone saws and other implements of which the mere thought could make even the pureblood's knees tremble as instinctive panic flooded his body at the vivid memory he had of those things being used on him on more than one instance.

The men finally mutually agreed on just ending the night and leaving, albeit that happened only by the time it was already well into the morning of the next day.

They merely untied the pureblood to retrieve custom restraints they'd brought, shoving him off the bed in the process, letting him fall heavily to the ground and lay there bleeding without any of them bothering with him anymore than to address him a last insult or a kick as they passed.

Kaname was too far gone to even register the last blows, and his flickering consciousness soon faded away, amidst the nightmare of pain and fear mixed with utter hopelessness he'd been feeling from the moment his savior failed to appear the previous day.

--

Time was something that had a very loose meaning for a slave. They lived in function of the cycles decided by their owners.  
At the 'houses', each day was a cycle centered on the work hours during the night, the rest of the time being spent in sleeping to recover –usually during the morning and early afternoon— and occasionally in getting sent out for 'repairs', if one had suffered enough damage to justify that expense, although usually, by the time the 'house' closed its doors, most handlers were ready to leave and no one bothered checking if a slave was wounded, unless something had been set-up ahead of time.

In this particular case, the customers left late enough that even though the handler in charge knew Kaname was probably in a terrible state, he didn't feel like bothering and just closed the place, leaving it for the next shift to check on the pureblood several hours later.

So Kaname stayed on the ground where the last customer's kick had left him, his fluttering consciousness coming and going, although he wasn't quite conscious even when it came closer to the surface, and was instead the prey of fears and errant thoughts that no rational part of him could attempt to counter in that state, regardless of how untrue or painful those thoughts may be.

'_You'll always be a slave, because it's what you deserve, vampire!! No one would ever want you for anything else!'_

'_You deserve it!'_

'_You deserve it!'_

'_You deserve it!!'_

_The beatings, the rapes, the fear, the horror… all of it._

He sobbed in his sleep, choked breath catching in his throat.

_Yes… perhaps, that was why Kiryuu-sama was doing this… Perhaps they were right, and there was something utterly wrong with him… surely, his whole life going so horribly wrong and getting worse with each breath he took had to be the proof that there was something colossally wrong with him, with _who_ or _what_ he was, for it all to happen that way…? If that was the case, it was only fair… if they were right, then he could understand, if not suffer less.  
Things would always remain as painful, but perhaps then, he could accept that this was why there was no hope for him, and then his heart wouldn't break as badly anymore…? If it was true that he deserved it, if it was fair, then maybe it would be less bad…?_

_If he managed to give up all hope, would he suffer less…?_ Each and every time he thought there was no hope left in him, he was proven wrong and his heart was shattered all over again…

Tears were rolling down his pale checks, leaving uncertain streaks on the caked blood and grime clinging to his bruised skin.

Even among the ocean of anguish and turmoil currently tearing at him, his body registered a strange feeling, that of gentle hands caressing his hair tentatively, trying to pull him off the ground with utmost care, and somehow that unsettling gentleness in such an unexpected moment was enough to tell him that this wasn't just in his mind, and that he was no longer alone in the room.

With a startled jolt, he woke up, dazed eyes fighting to open up espite the pain and his head spinning. When he could focus his vision, he found his face awfully close to the ground, and a warm body near him, gently supporting him from beneath his shoulders, as if the person was trying to lift him without making his wounds worse.  
The scent of tears was strongly present in the air, and although Kaname's senses weren't doing so great at the moment, he had the puzzlingly distinct impression that it wasn't just his own crying that was doing it, but someone else's tears as well.

"Ki… Kiryuu-sama…?"

The pureblood's heart was hammering in his chest, every muscle in his body screaming the agony of the beatings he'd taken, bruises and sprains too numerous to count and making him feel like his whole body was a raw mass of pain. There was dread in his voice when he spoke, and he couldn't prevent himself for trembling, not sure what the other might want to do to him, his senses too hazed to even tell if it indeed was_ his sav- …_the silver haired hunter that was there holding him.

For once, fate was perhaps a tiny bit clement with him, and it wasn't the man whom Kaname couldn't tell whether he hoped or feared to see. And yet… Much as it further horrified him to realize that, the pureblood knew that he couldn't fully ignore the part of him that desperately hoped that it had indeed been Kiryuu-sama, even if the man was there to land the last blow to break him.

But at least for now, he didn't have to deal with the while issue yet, as it wasn't Zero.

"No, Kaname-sama… Sorry. It's just me, Aidou."

_Was it disappointment on the pureblood's face?_ Aidou's heart tightened in his chest. _Who__ was this 'Kiryuu-sama' that Kaname-sama called for with such a mix of utter despair and longing in his voice…?_

Meanwhile, Kaname had started to realize what was happening and pulled back with surprise, a reaction that automatically made him flinch in pain from his open wounds.

_No, of course it couldn't be Kiryuu-sama… why would he bother coming here so soon after such a 'lesson'…?_

The bitterness of the pain finished to awaken the pureblood and he noticed fully what was going on.  
Kaname had practically jolted backwards, realizing with horror that the door was open and that Aidou was really in his room.

"What?!"

Slaves were confined to their respective rooms and not allowed to interact or even speak to each other. If someone were to catch them together, they'd accuse the blond of gross disobedience at best, and of attempting to escape at worst. The two of them would be inevitably punished in some horrible manner, at the very least.

"Get away from here, quick! Go back to your room before someone finds you!!" The pureblood's trembling hands, --all bruised and stained with his own blood, like much of the rest of his body—, were gripping the younger vampire's arms with panicked desperation belying the weakness of his limbs, fearing far more for Aidou than for himself. Kaname was too broken to think very clearly or consider what might or might not happen to him, but irrational panic was fully present and screaming to his still dazed perceptions that Aidou being there with him was _bad, _as in_ really really bad_, and that the blond had to get out as fast as he possibly could.

Aidou's heart raced in his chest to see Kaname that way, both horrified by how wounded the pureblood was, and terribly concerned, but also touched that Kaname seemed to care for what might happen to him – he knew the pureblood was someone good, but seeing his concern for him in an actually visible manner was deeply touching for the blond, who was so used to being ignored when there were others around seeing them.

"Do- don't worry, Kaname-sama! The handler on watch… I have an arrangement with him and he'll looking away for five minutes. I'll be back to my room on time."

_What?! _

"An arrangement… with a handler?! How?! And at what cost?! Are you out of your mind, Aidou?!"

Kaname may not be able to think straight at the moment –and if not for his own blood smeared on the ground all around him, for an instant he hadn't even been quite sure whether he was in his own room or another one—, but he was too used to the life as a slave to not bolt in horror at the idea of an arrangement with a handler. Such a thing was, to put simply, impossible. He'd learn it the hard way long ago, and it horrified him to think that maybe Aidou might still be prone to make mistakes that might cost him very dearly. If there was one thing Kaname did _not_ wish upon anyone else, it was to live the horror he'd lived so many times already. Aidou and him may live under the same roof, but Kaname had suffered far more over the years, and was probably more experienced in the horrors of slavery than most of the others there, especially since both handlers and customers were much harsher with him, relying on the fact that he could heal better and faster from things that would have put a weaker slave out of commission for a longer time.

But younger and of mixed blood or not, Aidou knew what he was in for. The two of them knew well that it was rather probable that the handler would betray the agreement and act as if he didn't agree to anything, punishing both vampires as if Aidou had snuck out of his room and into Kaname's one by himself… and if Aidou was unlucky enough, the handler would stick to the agreement, but the payment expected for overlooking such a thing and keeping the secret would be terrible.  
Handlers could easily rape a slave any time they felt like, provided that they were discreet and didn't leave damage hindering the customers' use of the 'merchandise', so there was no need for making any agreements like this… unless the handler hoped Aidou would provide _more interesting _services, that one couldn't get through rape.  
The blond was well aware of that when he took the gamble, but in his eyes, the chance to possibly help his precious Kaname-sama was well worth whatever he may have to endure for it.

Especially when the corridor was very much _filled_ with the scent of Kaname's blood, flooding Aidou's heart with boundless panic with each waft of that scent that slipped under the door to the blond's room.

The scent of the Kaname's blood being in the air was a frequent occurrence, with how brutal the customers could be, especially the ones coming to see a pureblood, but usually there was still less than today. If Ichiou had come by it wouldn't be a surprise in the least, but Aidou was pretty sure the hateful old man hadn't been around, so he didn't know what might be going on and was particularly scared for the pureblood.

The moment the blond had walked into the room, his heart had skipped a beat in absolute horror at the sight of Kaname fallen, unconscious, covered in his own blood, telltale streaks of it so unmistakably visible between his legs, in a way that was much too familiar for Aidou but which seemed so much more horrible when he saw it on Kaname rather than on himself.

It wasn't the first time Aidou saw Kaname wounded, but the sight was horrifying to him, precisely because he knew well how horrible one felt when receiving that type of injuries. And even though Aidou himself was drained, weakened by drugs and dreadfully hungry, the spilt pure blood being Kaname's made it such a shocking sight to him that it didn't even awake the hunger that should naturally have taken over him – at most, his eyes were slightly reddened with need, but he was too distracted by his concern for the brunet to even notice his own thirst.

But regardless of how much Kaname tried to push him away, Aidou wouldn't budge, and the pureblood didn't have the strength to push him away physically.

"Kaname-sama, I just want to look over your wounds and help you, I'll be gone before the time is up, I swear, you don't have to worry."

But Kaname knew Aidou well. They may almost never talk because he ignored the blond to avoid getting him in trouble by his fault, but after years under the same roof and suffering from the same ordeal side by side, he had an innate knowledge of the younger vampire, and knew that Aidou would do just about anything to protect him… including risking the worst for himself without hesitation if that could make the pureblood's burden slightly less heavy.

And Kaname couldn't stand the idea that someone would be suffering indescribable horrors by his fault, because they wanted to protect him. So against Aidou's best hopes, the pureblood pulled back, tugging away weakly when Aidou still held onto his left arm as he tried to get away. Desperation made their reactions extreme, as the blond would never have dared to touch the pureblood that way normally, much less openly disobey him when he saw that Kaname didn't have the strength to yank his arm out of the blond's grip.  
Surprised, Kaname tried making use of the status he no longer had but that he knew Aidou would still respect, and tried to put up a show of outrage to get the other to release him, exclaiming "Get away from me, Aidou! How dare you touch me?!"

But the blonde also knew the pureblood far too well, and so the regret in Kaname's exhausted eyes was easily visible for him, telling him that the anger was fake, and giving wings to Aidou's courage.

"Only one little moment longer, Kaname-sama! Let me do whatever I can for your wounds really fast and I'll be gone!!"

The pureblood was shocked speechless to see that the blond still clung to him even as he'd given him a direct order, and desperate at the idea that any time now, a handler might barge in and find them in the same room.  
If he wasn't pumped full of the anti-vampire drugs and if he'd been able to use his powers, Kaname could have easily bent Aidou's will to his, making him leave the very instant he wished him to. He could even use a burst of power and simply push him out of the room by force, although he wouldn't want to do any of those unpleasant things, especially not to a friend –he may ignore Aidou, but he was deeply touched by his devotion, and cared for the blond, which was precisely why he wanted him out and back to the relative safety of his own room as soon as possible, before someone found them and all hell broke loose.  
Kaname may be a pureblood, but he'd always had a gentle nature, and even as a child he had never wanted to impose his will on anyone. Now wanting or not didn't matter, since he couldn't even do that much, with the drugs in his blood.  
_If only…_ If only he'd grown up among other purebloods, he might have known what to do, ways to make another vampire do what you wanted without the need to be able to use one's powers or even without having to resort to any brutal methods, but… not only Kaname had always been gentle, but on top of that he'd lost his family at far too young an age, and lived most of his life so far locked away in the brothel, so other than learning to survive, he lacked far too many skills he might have otherwise had.

He cursed himself for not knowing how to push the other away, and desperate to get Aidou out of the room _now_, he instinctively did the only thing that came to mind, something that atavic instincts deeply rooted within him told him wordlessly that was the only way to go in such a case… The pureblood's hand swung out, palm open in preparation to deliver a resounding slap. Aidou stared in surprise, instinctively squeezing his eyes shut and bracing for impact that he expected to happen anytime now. Something equally deeply rooted within him made that it didn't even occur to him to try and dodge Kaname's slap.

But the slap never came, and so the blond opened his eyes tentatively.

Kaname's hand was still, stopped in mid-air, but it was shaking, and the pureblood's tired and bloodshot eyes were wet with new tears. He was involuntarily crying for Aidou.

"Don't… Don't make me do this, Hanabusa…"

Kaname squeezed his eyes shut to hide the tears, and his voice died by the end of the sentence, the other's name whispered so low that Aidou barely heard it. The last time the pureblood had called him that way, Kaname was five and Aidou four. Ever since the blond's brutal rejection back then, Kaname had only ever called him by his surname, even after they met again in the brothel.

Aidou's heart would have leapt in joy for the added intimacy of the way the pureblood had called him, if not for how miserable Kaname looked as he spoke.

The pureblood knew he should just slap Aidou, that in theory it was perfectly within his rights in the old world and that it would have been for the best of Aidou himself, putting things back in perspective and getting the blond to abandon his dangerous ideas, but… He'd lost so much in those ten years. He felt so utterly dirty that he didn't even know what he was doing, and somewhere within himself, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do at all. If only he'd grown up differently, he might have known better, but with things being what they were…

A drop rolled down the brunet's cheek, and Aidou stared in absolute shock, part mesmerized and part horrified. _Never, should those beautiful eyes have to shed tears. It is a sacrilege that anyone would dare to spill your tears, Kaname-sama… _

Aidou let go of the pureblood's arm, finally. The blond gently took hold of the Kaname's outstretched hand and caressed it softly, before gently closing the fingers on it and brushing its knuckles with his lips in a chaste kiss.

"You are the one and only person I wouldn't mind a slap from, Kaname-sama. But I don't ever want to make you do anything you don't want to do. I never want to spill your tears. So, much as it pains me, I'll leave as you asked."

Still holding the pureblood's hand and kissing it lovingly, Aidou gently reached up and brushed away the tears from Kaname's eyes. He would have much preferred to pull Kaname into his arms and kiss the pureblood's tears away, but much to his regret, he figured Kaname might not like that. If the only thing he could do for his love was to stay away, then he would do it, painful as it may be. He stood up gravely, addressing a smile filled with deep sadness to the pureblood, and exited the room, with one last entreaty. "Kaname-sama… please take care of yourself, will you…?"

The pureblood still managed to stay somewhat upright, partially sitting on the ground and partially leaning on his forearms, somewhat stuck in place by the surprise, nodding weakly in agreement and holding Aidou's tearful gaze until the blond disappeared behind the door.  
After that, he had to lay down for a little, breathing hard and trying to recoup quickly, as he'd expended far too much energy in their exchange.

He'd taken a glance at the clock and was worried wondering what the 'house' was up to. He couldn't know for sure whether they planned to send him for 'repairs' or whether they wouldn't bother with it, but either way he should be on the safe side to avoid getting punishing for 'lazying around', as handlers often claimed. After a few more minutes of rest, he managed to more or less drag himself and more or less crawl to the bathroom, wincing slightly at the sight of the bloody mess he'd made in the process and hoping he wouldn't be punished further –but then, the ground was already a mess anyway.

The few hours of rest while he'd been passed out had done him some good – he may be still terribly pale and unsteady from blood-loss and from how terribly starved he was, and stumble regularly because his open wounds made moving rather complicated, but he still managed to get into the bathtub and start washing himself, much to his surprise. It seemed like he still had some energy left, after all, however much it may feel like the faltering flicker of a candle in the wind whenever he took a beating this bad.

Sadly, if his body was feeling a little better than a few hours earlier, his mind was still just as torn.

'…_You deserve it…'_

It was by far not the first time he was told such things, nor the first time it happened at a moment when he was wounded and vulnerable enough for the words to leave an even worse impact on him and on his already tattered perceptions of the world and himself. In fact, Ichiou had often taken advantage of Kaname's moments of utmost misery to impress such ideas even more strongly upon the pureblood's ravaged consciousness.

But for some reason, things didn't feel the same, today. It was still nowhere as devastating as anything Ichiou could do, naturally – the older man seemed to have a _gift_ for shattering Kaname to pieces, it seemed— but it was still so much worse than the way he felt any other day when a handler or a random customer threw those words at him.

Perhaps it was because today, he'd been looking for answers, and was more prone to suffer from receiving such words in response, because then the sheer undeniability of it all was too horrifically blatant to ignore: Kaname couldn't help but think, on a subconscious level, that this was Kiryuu-sama's answer to him. That the previous night was the hunter's way to indirectly tell him _'Why would I bother going out of my way to protect you, when you deserve nothing more than what these men do to you?'_

Kaname's tired fingers clenched convulsively over the side of the bathtub and he sobbed softly, breath hitching in his throat as he watched the caked dry blood on his skin mix with the water pouring over him and slowly melt, flowing down to the drain in reddish rivulets; as he tried and failed to distract himself from the agonizing thoughts assaulting him.

_Surely, that had to be what Kiryuu-sama thought, otherwise he would have come, wouldn't he?_

That idea alone was enough to do far more damage to the pureblood than the torture employed by the group of men the previous night could ever do – and it sent spikes of pain shooting straight through his heart, far into his very soul.

When did 'Kiryuu-sama' and his opinions became so important for him that he'd suffer so much just from the idea that the man might think that way? Wasn't he supposed to know well that Kiryuu-sama was just playing a game and that it would end inevitably, sooner or later…?

He choked softly, wrapping his trembling arms around his knees and pulling them closer against his chest, burying his face against them as he sobbed, wet hair clinging to his face.  
At one point, he'd nearly tried to fool himself into thinking that maybe something had happened, preventing the hunter from coming, but he knew well that Zero had just returned recently from a mission, and was unlikely to be sent away again so soon, and besides… if that was the case he wouldn't have made the promise. _Reason_, which Kaname had avoided giving ears to for far too long, was much too quick to cruelly remind him that any hopes he might still have were utter rubbish.

He couldn't be sure whether Zero was associated with those men in any way or not, but whatever the answer may be didn't change the reality of it all. _The world was what it was –being a vampire and expecting gentleness from a hunter was either madness or suicide._

He didn't even know what to think anymore, but even so far gone he knew well what that meant for him: this vulnerability he had when it came to this man was going to cost him terribly. His whole life was already so utterly unstable and constantly at the mercy of everybody, he had no words to describe the foolishness of having left himself so open for even worse damage by allowing that hunter to have such power over his heart. It was exactly what he'd been feared all along, the reason why he'd tried so hard to push the other way, but it was to no avail: he was so lost and so utterly starved for any kindness and any gentle touch that even now, if the man entered his room and acted gently, he didn't trust himself to be able to resist him. Worse yet, if he stopped lying to himself he knew well he would be unable to even try resisting the urge to give in to the man– Kiryuu-sama's gentleness was far too addictive, a soothing balm allowing the pureblood to forget for a few moment just how horrible everything was and would still inevitably be as soon as the man left the room again.

_I played the game and lost. I should have known…_

The sound of the door of the room opening brutally jarred the pureblood out of his thoughts, making him jolt painfully. His first idea was that the handler supposedly making agreements with Aidou had turned against them, but a tentative glance to the bathroom door that he'd left open –slaves weren't allowed privacy, so he couldn't close it to bathe— revealed two handlers inspecting the mess, one of them with a mop and a bucket to sweep away the blood on the ground of the room.  
Nothing looked amiss, but rather than being reassured, the pureblood just kicked himself inwardly for not having had the sense to pull off the bloodied bed sheets, at least. Not that it would have changed anything in making things less stained, but at least he might not have been punished for not even trying. _If bothering with it was even worth the trouble, considering they'd probably just find whatever other reason to punish him for anyway._

He stayed curled up sitting in the bathtub in complete silence, lost in the contemplation of the cold water droplets collecting at the tips of the ringlets of his hair and then dripping from them, ignoring the water still falling over him, almost hoping against all logic that maybe the storm would pass and the men in the room would forget he existed and just leave with the dirty sheets, allowing him to stay there to continue wasting away watching his own blood running from his still open wounds. It was a far better prospect that them coming after him.

No such luck, however, as they quickly came into the bathroom once they were done mopping the ground and doing what they could for the stains at hand.  
Without further ado, they pulled him out of the bathtub with no regard for the fact he could barely stand, and dragged him out of the room without bothering telling him where they were going, one on each side of him holding him under his arms, to avoid wasting more time whenever he fell because he couldn't keep up with them.  
It was standard procedure to leave slaves in the dark and not bother speaking to them –after all, they were supposed to be 'beasts' and be treated accordingly—, so he didn't bother endangering himself further by asking questions without permission. He just tried to keep up as well as he could, shivering softly from the cold air on his bare skin, still wet from when he washed.

One of the men muttered under his breath about how stupidly _'easy to mess up'_ the slaves were, and the _bother_ that it was to have to keep taking them to have blood so that they could heal –if the handler had things his way, vampires should be able to heal right away to be put for rent the very next night without the 'houses' ever having to pay for them to get blood or have their wounds tended to. Alas, nature was of course not made so, and even a pureblood had his limits, especially so heavily drugged that they could barely even heal at all without being given blood.  
The 'houses' already normally cheapened out by not giving them blood unless they were so wounded or starved that they couldn't function anymore, so all slaves were utterly drained at all times.

Kaname kept his gaze on the ground at all times, knowing better than to give them an excuse for an additional beating –slaves were at their most vulnerable when particularly wounded by a customer, because then it meant that handlers could more easily exact cruelty on them without anyone finding out that the 'merchandise' was damaged by someone other than a customer.

For once, he was lucky –if one could say so in such circumstances—, as there were only so many hours left before the 'house' was to open again the next night, and the owner was rather disinclined to have the pureblood out of service, so the handlers didn't have time to _play_ with him today, much to their disappointment.

However, Kaname was horrified to find out that since the previous customers had complained before leaving about the fact that one could see his newly grown fangs starting to peek out of his gums, the owner had decided to get two birds with one stone, and do his fang removal and extra shots on the same occasion. Which meant that the pureblood would only have a very minimal amount of time to benefit from the blood he'd be given, before the boost of anti-vampire drugs interrupted his healing, leaving his worst wounds healed but his body still aching almost as much inside, as the cuts would close but all the scar tissue under the skin would still be there, as that was what took the longest to finish being absorbed and turned into healthy flesh again by his healing.  
Not only that, but the drug shots always left him so terribly groggy afterwards that he was barely good for anything at all for a day or so after it, which always made him incur the renewed wrath of handlers and customers alike. That along with the brutal fang removal and the pain from the barely healed wounds would be a complete nightmare.

_Nothing new…_

He knew better than let the apprehension show on his face, or seem rebellious in any way, passively or actively. His perfect mask of submission was the only shield he had to protect himself from further abuse, and so he held onto it with all he had, trying his best to stand when ordered so, and stumbling towards the horror as he was ordered, regardless of how much he may just want to scream and rebel with all he had all along the way while they took him to the place. _The problem was, he didn't __**have**__ anything left –no energy, no strength, not even the will to put up any resistance._

He just mechanically went through the motions, ignoring the disgust and burying his mouth against the cut the humans made on the neck of the level C they took him to, and drinking as much as he could from the other before the handler that brought him yanked him off in response to a hand gesture from the person in charge of the place, indicating they'd reached the quote they'd paid for.  
Over ten years, Kaname had learned well that they'd always try to give them as little as it was possibly feasible, and so the very first draughts truly mattered. Many times, he hadn't been fast enough and had been yanked off after barely having time to drink a mouthful, barely enough to even begin healing at all, especially since it was such weak blood that they were always given.  
The leash tied to the collar around his neck was particularly cruel on his bruised skin, but utter starvation and absolute need to cling onto any little thing he might still have left to help him recoup a little were motivation enough and helped the pureblood not choke when he was yanked off the other vampire.

He zoned out as they shoved him onto the ground near a wall, waiting for his healing to pick up and close the worst of his wounds. From the corner of his eyes, the pureblood watched the room fading back and forth as he lost consciousness over and over, his body tried to fix itself up despite the anti-vampire drugs still present in it. The fresh blood helped a lot —he wouldn't have been able to heal without it— but it didn't mean that the drugs in his blood stream were any less strong, and the clash between his healing amped up by the blood and the anti-vampire drugs trying to shut it down made it hard to stay awake. He dozed on and off, feeling like it had been years of him being curled up on the filthy ground of that place, probably because he'd long lost count of how many times they'd had to take him to get blood to heal over the years. With Ichiou's visits alone, he was guaranteed to need the extra boost to heal _at least_ once a month. Not to mention the regular occurrences of brutal customers who paid a bit more just to be able to go the extra mile about damaging him…

It was like an old ritual really, the way he'd curl up on the ground in a corner and wish he was smaller and more readily forgettable, consciousness flickering back on every so often to see the handler who'd brought him there that day sitting farther in the room looking bored and waiting for enough time to have passed before bringing him back. The humiliation of it all, the utter misery and indignity… one might have died of that alone, but pride and self-respect were things that had shattered long ago, leaving only shards too small to matter as much, and he was too exhausted to even do more than feel the burning of unshed tears stinging in his eyes as he lay there half-conscious, fighting the pain and the nausea together.

All around the room, slaves from the same brothel or other ones were in very much the same situation, coming in and out of awareness as they struggled to heal as well, and the handlers of the 'blood bank' brought fresh 'donors' each time one was too weakened to go on supplying the needs of the slaves sent by the houses for 'repairs'.

Much of the elite of the vampire society had been lost, killed at the summit of its youth and beauty during the war, but what had survived was greedily kept, and each 'house' prided itself in having only the best specimens in its display windows. Slaves that weren't good enough for that ended up in the tea-house areas of the brothels, or in seedier establishments; but for the less beautiful ones among the lower ranks, there was always the blood banks. Occasionally, human criminals were used for that too, although only in case of shortage, as the idea seemed taboo to many people. Even a human murderer was still considered better than a vampire.

It always seemed like there wasn't enough time, and that he'd barely started healing at all by the time the handler from his 'house' got up and kicked him awake before dragging him out unceremoniously, not bothering to make sure whether the pureblood could walk on his own so soon or not. But the larger cuts had closed, and the 'house' didn't consider worth it waiting for everything to be healed. In their eyes, what mattered was what might be bothersome for the customers, and they couldn't care less for bruises and scrapes, or whether under the skin the pureblood was still utterly raw. In their eyes, far too much time had already been wasted, and they had to get the shots done soon before returning him to work.

So Kaname had no choice but to stagger after the man holding his chain, who was currently dragging him towards a poorly lit corridor with stained walls, which the pureblood knew far too well, and which elicited such abject disgust and utter horror in him that he couldn't stifle the shudders shaking his exhausted frame as they drew closer to the open door near the end of the corridor, and the noise of old metal being sharpened grew louder…

--

Far from there, at Cross Academy, Yuuki was sitting in the kitchen of the pleasant little cottage her adoptive father and her inhabited in the company of Seiren. Her gaze was lost on the wall, eyes shining a little as if wet.

From the corridor adjacent to the kitchen, Seiren eyed her with concern, scanning the surroundings out of habit before stepping into the room –officially, she was Cross' personal slave, and interacting with his daughter would be considered shocking, so the trio always took precautions for no one else to find out. Seiren would be confined to her quarters if someone was over, just in case.  
In the vampire's eyes, her reason to live was this, Kaname's last orders to her, the family she'd been asked to protect with her life, even though she no longer had the memories of _why_ they were so important.

_Kaname-sama had considered them important. _It was far enough reason for her.

"Yuuki-sama, are you well?"

The brown-haired girl jolted slightly, not having heard the other approach, but she quickly put up a reassuring smile out of habit, not wanting to worry any of her loved ones. The smile didn't seem to be enough though, and since she was unable to speak, Yuuki pulled out her pocket notebook and scribbled away a reply.

[I'm fine, S. Don't worry! :D]

She was happy with her family, she really was, but… there was just something missing, a feeling impossible to shake off no matter how many years passed. It was also because she couldn't remember her past, and it still hurt, but it wasn't just that. There was _so much more_ she felt she was missing.

Along with the inevitable odd feeling she had, telling her that her happiness was paid for at a much too heavy price, and that there was something horribly amiss in the world, going far deeper than the political situation with the slaves and the many things she normally already worried about, such as the future of the Academy and of the enslaved vampires all over.  
She felt guilty for being too sheltered to relate to it well, but she hated the fact that Seiren had to wear a collar and couldn't be free to go wherever she may want, or the fact that her adoptive father was looked down by so many people just for saying that vampires should be given the same rights than humans. In Yuuki's sweet heart, it hurt her so much more for the utter injustice of it all, than for the fact that she'd been relentlessly mocked for it by other kids ever since she first entered class, for having the 'weird' dad who said vampires should be free.  
Ten years were enough to realize that the world could be utterly cruel, and that she owed a great deal to her father for creating such a safe haven for her and even Seiren, despite all the risks he always took. She also realized that if not for the fact that he had a daughter, the chairman would be free to militate much more openly for the things he believed in. Everything came at a price, even the delicate balance of their happiness and the peace in their little house. And guilty as she may feel, she also felt so deeply grateful to those around her.

If the only thing she could do was smile and go on looking happy so that they wouldn't worry, then she would do it as well as she could.

Seiren wasn't fooled though, and that was plain enough on her unconvinced look, so Yuuki followed up, the pencil dancing over the paper quickly as her lithe fingers shaped word after word.

[I was just thinking. I don't know why I feel down, it's one of those weird days.]

The 'weird days' were similar to the 'weird nights' both her and Cross had, made of strange presentiments and worries that woke them up and that they couldn't quite place. The fact that it was terribly frequent made them more or less used to it, but that didn't help dispel the strange worry in the air on those days. Yuuki had actually come home early from class, claiming she felt sick when in truth she just felt strangely restless and wanted some time alone.  
Yori, her best friend, had walked her home, worried that Yuuki might be getting sick or something, as this winter had been particularly cold and the slender girl always seemed like such a frail being, her long hair swept by the wind and her pale little hands stuffed in the pockets of the oversized jackets she liked wearing when not at school. Yori was more outgoing, almost tomboyish, in part perhaps because over the recent years she'd developed more and more the urge to look out for Yuuki, who was otherwise very much like a little bird in a storm, from Yori's point of view.

As Seiren continued to scrutinize her in a way that made her start to fidget, Yuuki quickly penned on the paper the more concrete reason why she'd been staring at nothing in particular with such a melancholic look.

[Look, S. My favorite cup broke earlier... ]

She pointed at the mug on the table, and Seiren's gaze followed her index finger, to see that the handle had broken off and was laying to the side looking forlorn. The girl was thinking of asking her father to fix it later when he got back from school.

"It's an ill omen…"

The words had left the young vampire's mouth before she could hold them back, but in response to Yuuki's somewhat worried stare, Seiren quickly dismissed it, regretting her slip. "Don't worry, Yuuki-sama. That's just old folktales. I'm sure it doesn't really means anything."

Only, something within her told her it _did_ mean something was wrong, and she couldn't help but worry too.

--

At the Hunter Association Headquarters, Zero had just spent a miserable day, to say the least.

It was so bad that one of his colleagues even joked saying that Zero was slacking off because he felt full of himself after being commended for his courage during the recent mission. The silver-haired hunter didn't even rise to the bait, too busy lost in thought, and the other man could only go back to work looking embarrassed for the failed joke.  
Some of them conjectured that perhaps he had problems at home or a fall out with a girlfriend, although they could swear Zero didn't have one, so the theories were rather vague.

The inevitable curiosity among young hunters of the same section aside, they were actually getting worried as he went by the whole day looking like a shadow of himself.

--

Elsewhere, a certain someone was now far less than a shadow, even…

The clock on the wall ticked slowly in the dim room, its noise the only sound Kaname could focus on.

A tear ran down the pureblood's face and dropped onto the bed coverlet. If he could think clearly, he'd worry about crying in front of others, since people would be coming to his room in anytime soon, but he was nowhere in a condition to be very rational.

His entire body felt laden with pain and a feverish burning. He'd been pushed much too far in way too little time. That along with the extreme dizziness he was feeling from the overdose of anti-vampire drugs flowing through his bloodstream, and the terribly distracting throbbing in his jaw made it nearly impossible to think straight.

The bedspread was thick, made of a heavy fabric with decorative flowers and vines embroidered on it, in the same color than the fabric, so that from afar it was barely noticeable but up close the whole thing was visible. Much like other things provided by the 'house', it didn't look worthy of the antique luxurious bed it covered. And currently, the embroidery was chafing the pureblood's bruised skin, made particularly delicate and sensitive in the parts where he'd been hit harder or where cuts were still healing slowly. But he knew better than pull the coverlet off and lay on the sheets beneath. A customer would be here soon. Everything had to be right in place, and he had had better be ready to 'work'.

As it was, he had to stab his palms with his nails to try and not fall asleep just from how drowsy the drugs made him, although there was something so much more dreadful that made him nervous enough to not lose conscience just yet.

_Doom would be coming soon. _

Kaname didn't think he had the strength to get up, and inevitably, that wasn't going to be very good when the person came in.

On top of the horrible beating he'd taken the previous night –torture and rape lasting into the wee hours of the morning— and of the fact that the handlers had given him barely enough blood to get his body jumpstarted on healing the worst of the previous night's damage, just so that he could work without other customers being bothered by his state, they had also proceeded to defang him and give him his anti-vampire drugs shots all at once, as they'd planned.  
It was common for them to get the fangs and the drugs covered in the same hit, but the side effect of it was that it always slowed the rate of healing of the wounds and made things worse for the slaves even normally. The fact that this time it had happened just after such a heavy beating, right when he was still feeling so bad made it all even worse… but then, that too wasn't infrequent, as the 'house' didn't care for wounds that didn't impair his value as merchandise.  
Internal bleeding, agonizing pain, it didn't matter as long as his outwards appearance was more or less okay, even if in some cases that meant concealing the worse wounds with bandages until he stopped bleeding completely. And no one there really cared that he was covered in bruises, or even bandages occasionally, his body not managing to cope with everything at once, his healing staggering and stalling, taking longer to close the worse wounds.

But this was _by far_ not the worst about it all: In a normal day, it would have been nearly unbearable, but today, there was something even _more_ frightening than the idea of facing hordes of horny customers while he couldn't even really stand up to try and placate them.

The worst of all was that he was pretty sure Ichiou would be coming tonight, and if the thought of facing a normal customer in that state already made him want to curl up in a corner and disappear, the thought of _Ichiou_ putting his hands on him when he was _that_ vulnerable made him wish he was dead already.

Death couldn't _possibly_ be as bad as Ichiou.

Normally, Kaname would try to force himself to live, would grit his teeth and endure for the sake of the possibility of the future being different, and in case Yuuki ever needed him alive for whatever reason, but right now…

There was only so much a person could take. The weight that he'd been carrying on his shoulders since a much too early age would have broken lesser men long ago.  
As it was, it was difficult to get up each day, if not for the fact that _not_ getting up meant someone would force him to, in a rather brutal manner. Perhaps that was the only reason why he still bothered to.

Through the foggy haze the drugs in his blood induced, Kaname was desperately trying to hold the tears and remember how many days had passed lately. He often lost track of time, especially when there were particularly bad beatings, but he could swear that little more than two weeks or so had passed since the last time Ichiou came by…? _Could a month have already passed without him noticing? _

The pureblood coughed softly, tensing with pain as his muscles contracted. He couldn't tell how long had passed after all. But then, the old bastard didn't always come only once a month. He'd come _at least _once a month for sure, but there were occasional times when he'd come more often. Kaname didn't know if that had been because Ichiou had been less busy those months and decided to toy with him more often or what, but the fact was, there was no way to be sure when he'd come.

What made the pureblood so certain that doom was imminent was the fact that he'd been told to stay in his room before the house opened. Normally, he was always taken to the display to attract customers at the beginning of a new night.

Only when Ichiou called ahead of time to have him put aside to wait for him, did they not bother taking him downstairs. _So inevitably…_

It could be that his current state made that he would make poor display material, but then, in the past he'd been shackled to the chair in the window even in times when he could barely remain conscious. He recalled quite distinctly Aidou's horrified gaze one of those times, when seeing a handler hit him awake after he'd passed out.

The canopy of the bed and the ceiling were spinning, as if they were mocking the dizzy pureblood and the horrible urge to throw up that was churning within him. If only he could get up, he might try and drag himself to the bathroom, but he didn't even have that much energy, so he just closed his eyes tight and tried to will the nausea away weakly.

It didn't help that his mouth was bleeding too, from where they'd torn off his fangs. To any other vampire, his blood would be the nectar from heavens, but for him, it was just… _his own blood_, not any more palatable than a person finds their own scent attractive or appealing. And right about now, it was oozing into the back of his throat and making him even sicker. He covered his mouth as quickly as he could when he felt a muscle spasm ripple through his nauseated body. It passed, luckily, and his arm dropped back to the bed sluggishly.

_Would the horror never end?!_

Footsteps in the corridor, still far away but definitely coming in this direction. He could perceive them through the haze, but he barely managed to roll over on his side and weakly try to push himself onto his forearms.

_Oh…_ _Blood on the bedspread again._ If it stained once more, he'd be in even more trouble. _Nothing new… Stains happened far too often anyway, seeing how frequently he got hurt… _

His mind was doing strange zigzags, incapable of focusing on a single thing, too clouded to think straight. He nearly fell off the bed, but at the last minute managed to drag himself closer to the border and then to the corner, panic making him slightly faster but no less unsteady, his movements frantic as he reached for the bedpost to try and use it as support to get up. The footsteps were almost by the door now, and he'd be damned if he was going to let Ichiou find him on the bed, offered for the taking as the old monster opened the door. No, he'd be standing, even if it killed him. In fact, through the wanderings of his drugged mind, he irrationally hoped it might _really_ kill him, although he knew well that most likely he'd just slip and fall and then go through hell at the old bastard's hands all the same, regardless of the position he may be in when Ichiou entered.

He was so far gone that he wasn't even sure why he bothered trying at all. It couldn't be for pride, he had none left that he knew of. But Ichiou was the one exception to everything, when it came to Kaname's resistance. Even half dead and nearly throwing up from misery, Kaname still insisted to get up so that he would seem somewhat in control of himself to face his enemy. Regardless of the fact that Ichiou always had a way to break him all over again and have him crawling at his feet in self-loathing and misery by the end of each visit. Maybe precisely because he knew how easily Ichiou could destroy him, he insisted on resisting at least at the beginning, for as long as he possibly could, before the horror swallowed him whole and forced a much-loathed surrender out of him. That tiny resistance may be completely ineffective, but at least it meant he hadn't surrendered from the beginning, which in a certain way was a little victory for him.

He slipped, nearly fell, then caught himself and almost blanked out from his whole body refusing to put up with the effort to stand up in the miserable condition it currently was. _He must make quite an odd picture, dead pale and struggling to hold onto the bedpost to pull himself up._

He went livid with the effort, but clung to it and pushed his protesting muscles further, forcing them to function despite how weakened and battered they were.

And by the time the lock in the door clicked, he was standing fiercely. He might even have been proud of that, if he hadn't been so broken, and far too busy trying not to fall or pass out.

Even though he knew well that he would fall soon, and even though he had to cling to the bedpost with both hands, looking not any less desperate than a man clinging to a lifeline in the middle of a storm in the Cape Horn.

But he was still standing.

_Only a little longer... If I can hold this way until the old bastard comes here… if he hits me or something, I'll have an excuse to fall, but if I can stand until then… only a little longer…_

The door swung open and then slammed back shut behind someone, but the person who had rushed inside wasn't Ichiou.

To Kaname's surprise, it was Zero.

The pureblood clung harder to the bedpost, shivers running through his exhausted body as he blinked again and again, expecting it to be an illusion of his feverish mind that would fade anytime now, and trying to see through it.

_Dreaming. I'm dreaming, and I'll wake up in hell, in Ichiou's clutches._

A cold white rush passed through Kaname's head, and he could only see the room spinning much faster than before as he felt himself free-falling, Zero's worried voice getting closer before the pureblood's hearing was gone. And then, there was a great black emptiness.

.

_._

_[tbc]_

_

* * *

_

_*dodges rocks* Sorry, I just COULDN'T resist putting a cliffhanger. XD;;  
We'll see their meeting in the next chapter, which I strongly hope I'll be able to finish tweaking faster than the recent ones. :D I have been pretty busy lately, so I haven't been finding much time to write those past two months, but I love writing this story and feel guilty for the lovely readers who've been patiently waiting all this time. *hearts*_

_The next chapters should feature some events that you'll hopefully find interesting. ;3_

_As a quick note: I know that sometimes people on FFnet mistake "Aidou" for being the first name when it's the family name, so I thought I'd just give a heads up: Hanabusa is the first name, Aidou is the surname.  
You can find a list of the official spellings in a link off my profile, if you're interested. ^^/_

_And no, the fic isn't going to become Aidou x Kaname, it's unrequited love. XD *lol* Poor Aidou.  
Though I have other fics I want to write with those two, when I have more time. ;D_

_As you've guessed, the chapter title is named after one of HIM's songs again. ;D *is trying to do that for all chapters of this story*  
"Sleepwalking past hope" is an epic song, and quite lovely! It has a line in its lyrics, "ran out of blood and hope" which I almost used as title instead, but Kaname's drowsy state made me want to use the word "sleepwalking."_

_The song goes:_

"I gave up long ago  
Painting love with crimson flow  
Ran out of blood and hope  
So I paint you no more…"_  
_

_Which reminds me, I need to buy the DVD of their most recent live show, sometime. *-*  
*fangirl, wishes to watch HIM live in person one day* X3_

* * *

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	17. Every single tear you cry

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 17 – "Every single tear you cry."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Sooner than expected~? :D *was feeling guilty for the slow updates lately* XD; *lol*  
__So sorry that the review replies are still way late… and thank you so much for your lovely patience! :D *hearts*_

_Thank you SO MUCH to the lovely Blackened Wing for your help with the language thing~! :D *loves* You are utterly awesome! X3 _

* * *

.

_._

_The door swung open and then slammed shut, but the person who had rushed inside wasn't Ichiou. _

_To Kaname's complete surprise, it was Zero. _

_The pureblood clung harder to the bedpost, shivers running through his exhausted body as he blinked again and again, expecting it to be an illusion of his feverish mind, and trying to see through it, expecting it all to disappear and Ichiou to be there anytime._

_A cold white rush passed through Kaname's head, and he could only see the room spinning much faster than before as he felt himself free-falling towards the ground, Zero's worried voice getting closer. And then, there was a great black emptiness. _

--

"_Kaname!"_

"_KANAME!!"_

"_Are you okay?!"_

"_Kaname, can you hear me?! Kaname!!"_

Why wouldn't the voice just go away and leave him in the peaceful oblivion he had fallen into…? He didn't know what to reply. He clearly _wasn't_ okay, far from that, but for some reason… he felt a little as if the immense bubble of panic that had been growing more and more inside him and that was threatening to swallow his whole soul a moment ago had burst, and now he was floating in a strange form of limbo. He felt as if he was immersed in water, just drifting away aimlessly, barely hearing anything, his ears underwater, matching the haze of the drugs making his blood weak and his mind so terribly foggy.

But the voice just wouldn't simply leave him and let him sink further into this inviting emptiness inside which he hoped he might not feel pain anymore. _At least for a little while I might have had peace at last…?_

Suddenly, he was yanked out of his strange drifting, and forcefully pulled back into a world filled with sound and colors that were much too harsh for his tired and overly sensitive senses. The drugs may dull his perceptions, but right about now the room felt far too light and loud for his mind, which had gotten used to the dull darkness he'd sank into.

He whimpered and tried to curl into himself to pull away from whoever had been shaking him awake, but he seemed to be enclosed in their arms and couldn't escape. That realization triggered a renewed panic instantly, making him struggle weakly in the unknown arms, until he froze, recognizing the scent and the voice of the person holding him.

Incidentally, it was the same voice that had been calling for him while he drifted unconsciously.

"Are you okay??"

The pureblood opened his eyes with difficulty, blinking painfully at the light flooding them, so different from the darkness he had been lost in. He stared at Zero, their faces mere inches apart. Then, he realized he really wasn't dreaming and his stomach lurched in horror. He swept the room with his gaze immediately, panic taking him as he searched for Ichiou, whom he expected _must_ be in the room by now. The hunter thought he was still delirious, and continued trying to get his attention.

"Kaname? Kaname! It's me, look at me! It's okay!!"

"But he… but he…"

Near feverish panic along with utter confusion had taken their toll on the already exhausted pureblood, and his eyes were shining against his best attempts to hold back desperate tears.

"Who? We're alone, you don't have to worry."

"But he called, didn't he? Someone called… someone… I… I wasn't taken to the display, so someone…must …have…"

"Is this why you're worried? I called. I made the reservation."

"What…?"

The pureblood was finally starting to understand now, as if gears were clicking into place and getting through his daze.

_So Kiryuu-sama had called, not Ichiou._ That must be why, somehow, he'd felt strangely calm while unconscious. Some way or another, he'd understood in an instinctual level that only Zero was in the room, even though he'd initially panicked when he came back to his senses not knowing what was happening.

He was still feeling very lost and shaken, glancing around with worry, as if he didn't dare believe that he could possibly be really safe, fearing the old monster might appear out of nowhere suddenly to tear him out of Zero's arms.

Kaname was sufficiently dazed and out of things that the very words he was uttering didn't register in his mind at first, too broken with despair and pain – if they did, he wouldn't have dared to voice them.

"Why… did you leave me alone…? Why did you… leave me… with them…?"

Tears rolled down his cheeks and he bit his lip, turning suddenly silent as he realized with mortified shock that he was speaking of something he didn't think he had the right to.  
_What right do I have to complain that he didn't come as I asked… so foolish to presume he would…why should he care anyway…? _

The burning words of the men the previous night were still seared deeply into the pureblood's memory. _'You deserve it.' _The answer, which he thought came indirectly from Zero, was not one so easily forgotten.

_I… I've learned my lesson well. If I ever ask something of him, I'll lose what little I still have._

Kaname trembled softly in the hunter's arms, gaze lost on some random point on the other's chest, desperately afraid that he might already have said too much and that the hunter might pull away and leave him alone any time now.

Zero felt something in his heart squeezing suddenly at the sound of the pureblood's broken words in that quivering voice, so shaken from horror and pain, far too gone to sound like the reserved version Kaname had tried to use in other occasions.

The hunter may not know the depths of the maelstrom of worry and feelings unfurling within Kaname's heart, but he did realize that the pureblood still wasn't quite himself. He picked him up gently, pulling aside the bedspread and gently placing the shivering body down onto the soft sheets.

Against his best intentions, Kaname couldn't help but cling to the hunter's sleeve like there was no tomorrow. He didn't want to, but his fingers clenched compulsively to the fabric and wouldn't let go, cramping painfully when he tried to force himself to release it. His body and his mind were refusing to cooperate with one another, and the exhaustion and recent horror weren't helping.  
Zero just sat next to him, pulling the covers back over the pureblood's legs but not letting go of him so that he would feel reassured.

Zero had seen the pureblood badly hurt many times now, but this was the first time _he_ was the one responsible for Kaname's injuries and his obvious pain. Even though he wasn't physically one of the ones who had abused the vampire... he hadn't protected him. He had let it happen. This was _his_ fault. He'd promised Kaname that he'd be there for him, he'd promised, and yet… Ultimately, it didn't matter that it was Ichiru who'd asked him to not go. There was no excuse for having broken a promise that had such heavy consequences. He'd known it in his heart since the previous night, but the certainty of it burned so much more brightly now that he was sitting next to the pureblood, watching him shiver softly in silence. Guilt burned within Zero's heart with searing violence.

It was a testimony to how much Zero had begun to change, that he could even begin to consider that a prior engagement with a vampire could possibly be more important than a spur-of-the-moment evening of hanging out with his brother.

Even now, guilty as he may be feeling, the thought would not have seemed as natural save for the fact that Ichiru would suffer no consequences from Zero's absence, while Kaname obviously had, and dire ones at that. It was the deciding factor that unconsciously pushed Zero one step farther into opening up to _this_ vampire.

Leaning over the pureblood, the hunter whispered softly in his ear, "Shh, shh, it's okay…"

Kaname shivered harder, not having expected the effect the man's warm breath tickling his ear might have. A shudder ran down his entire body as he felt his feverish temperature rise yet a few more notches, for a whole different reason than the mere fever. He stifled a little whimper, irrationally afraid that the man might be disgusted to know that such a simple contact and closeness were enough to make him so painfully happy. Happy regardless of what his reason told him.

Zero held Kaname against his chest protectively, stroking the brown locks of hair softly, his hand occasionally straying down to chase tears off Kaname's pale cheeks in a gentle caress of the thumb. Pulling him closer, his lips brushed the pureblood's feverish forehead as he whispered something repeatedly.

Kaname was so utterly lost between the guilty delight of the unexpected moment of pleasure, the fear that it might just end suddenly without warning, possibly even violently, and the thick fog of the drugs still making him unable to quite tell what was real and what wasn't. All of his perceptions were jumbled and oddly irresponsive, despite how hot his body felt. It was like being lost in a furnace within his own body, unable to even know what was truly happening to him or whether the unexpected blissful joy he couldn't help feeling would come at a heavy price or not.

And yet, despite that, something managed to pierce through Kaname's haze. The words Zero was whispering over and over in a desperate tone… Kaname froze when he finally realized what the hunter was saying. Maybe because it wasn't something he'd _ever_ expected anyone to tell him, much less a _hunter_ of all people...

"…_I'm so sorry, Kaname… I'm so terribly sorry…" _

It was so unexpected and so utterly unbelievable that Kaname had to hear him repeat it several times before it finally, truly went through and nudged him all the way awake. It seemed so impossible that the pureblood had trouble believing his ears. Even after he'd heard it over and over, his brain still seemed to have trouble processing it.

"Wh…at…? Why…?"

If the pureblood had been at his best, he would perhaps have been puzzled without displaying it so openly. However, with his current state and the feverish drug-induced dizziness, he had trouble even speaking, and couldn't comprehend why the hunter was apologizing to him – he thought Zero had _planned_ for the previous night to happen the way it did, as a lesson to him. As a result, he couldn't understand why the hunter could possibly be apologizing for it now.

"I'm so sorry I didn't make it on time yesterday… I'll… Kaname, I'll never break a promise to you again…"

Zero may still not know what exactly pushed him to feel so compelled to ease this vampire's suffering in particular, but he knew guilt when he felt it, knew it quite well, and he'd been feeling horrible about the broken promise since the previous night. The sight of the wounded pureblood collapsing to the ground a little bit ago had only further driven home the point that he'd done something unforgivable. He'd given Kaname hope of safety and then crushed it by failing to come and protect him. Especially gut-wrenching was knowing that something as simple as his presence would have saved Kaname from the unspeakable horror that he'd undoubtedly been through.

The hunter was determined to make it up to the pureblood, and if for now all he could do to atone was cradle him close and try to shoo his fears away, then he would try his very best at it. Any feeling of weirdness at holding a vampire was completely gone. All that Zero could possibly feel was that the wounded form in his arms desperately needed him, along with the vague realization that he himself couldn't bear to be parted with the other at the moment, so he pulled him closer and just tightened his hold protectively.

Kaname however, had no way of knowing what had been going on in the hunter's mind since the previous day, and couldn't help but automatically tense, fear and distrust making him expect a continuation of the 'lesson' he imagined the incident had been. Torn between his unfathomable need to surrender into the other's arms, and the much more logical terror gripping his heart at the idea that perhaps their game was over, Kaname was even more surprised to hear the hunter's apologies than he might have been before the previous night.

He knew, knew with all of his reason, that he should cling to the memory of what he'd been thinking of, earlier that day. He had to accept how foolish it was to have any hope of anything true and kind ever coming from a hunter visiting one of the 'houses', but… when Zero held him this way and whispered desperate apologies into his ear, Kaname found himself very much unable to think, period.

And the more Zero held him close and whispered gentle reassurances and various apologies into his ears as he caressed him, the more Kaname found himself realizing something that seemed strangely shocking at first, because it clashed so completely with all that his self preservation instincts had told him all along.

He realized that he felt _warm_ in the hunter's arms. Not just a mere physical sensation in his body, but strangely… a much deeper and touching one in his heart as well.

_Zero was made of pure, unbridled warmth._

Kaname, who always felt so dreadfully cold and lost in the dark, finally found warmth in someone. And to his horror, he thought that maybe, if only Zero were to go on a little longer holding him in his arms like this, he would probably be okay with anything the hunter may want to do to him.

_Fate must be particularly cruel to make such a joke, finally give him warmth through the most impossible person…_

Being _'okay'_ with anything was a figure of speech, naturally—he'd be completely destroyed if the hunter decided to finally break that mask of caring gentleness _right now_, but… with a certain measure of added horror, the pureblood realized he'd gone past the point where he could possibly hope to have any chance to keep his distances or keep his heart closed to this hunter, however much he'd come to accept the idea that whatever he may want or hope for, his kind benefactor was unattainable, because he couldn't be real. The kindness, and thus, the warmth coming from it, had to be a mask.

But if Zero was going to destroy him at the end of that ongoing game they had, then so be it, he'd at least enjoy what little time he might still have left before that day inevitably came.

So he just surrendered into the hunter's arms and didn't even try to hold back, just melting into his embrace and drinking in the soothing words that he needed so much, regardless of how it hurt so badly to know that he wouldn't be able to have it for much longer, because it couldn't possibly be real, couldn't possibly last, just _had_ to be all a lie...

_I'll believe all your lies… just please keep holding me…_

If the pureblood still had enough pride left, he'd probably hate himself for that shameful surrender into the arms of someone he knew could only be an enemy… but he was far too starved for the scraps of that warmth he so desperately needed to survive even a little bit longer in the maelstrom of horror that his life had been for the past ten years. He'd lost too much to refuse what he needed so desperately.

_If only you could hold me a little bit longer, I might not even mind losing myself completely…_

But the certainty that the end was inevitable no matter how safe he felt in the other's arms –or perhaps precisely because of that odd feeling, one that should have been so utterly wrong for a vampire to feel in a hunter's arms, and that felt instead so paradoxically _right_— the impossible to ignore future loss was ever-present in the pureblood's mind.

_So this is what it feels, to be condemned, enjoying one's last moments without hope of escaping._

Except that he wasn't condemned to death –that would be far too swift and _freeing_, for a slave— he was condemned to an eternity of suffering, his pureblood body making him unable to escape that life. He had been given a taste of the delight that he could never have for real, one that he was bound to lose sooner or later. However much he knew it was bound to be impossibly ephemeral, it still chilled him to the bone to know that anytime, he could lose all of this, the warmth of the arms encircling him so utterly gently.

It made him second guess every single instant, fearing that any breath he drew or any word he spoke might accidentally upset the hunter or tip the balance of things in the wrong direction one way or another. And every single thing the hunter said or did, the slightest sound that left his lips or the slightest gesture when he reached to caress him… every single time Kaname couldn't help but jolt inside, fearing the turning point was about to come sooner than expected.

He tried to hide his nervousness, but it was still visible, and Zero worried about what he could possibly do to put the pureblood less on edge. He didn't know exactly what scared Kaname so much, but his mind raced, providing him with various scenarios of what might have happened the previous night to traumatize the pureblood further, inevitably making him feel even more guilty.

Kaname had been hurt so often and so badly that he couldn't possibly trust the happiness at hand to be real, no matter how many reassurances Zero offered. That belief was even more firmly set after these recent events. But however guilty Zero may feel for having caused the incident, he still didn't know the depth of Kaname's despair, and had no idea how far the pureblood's fears went.

Despite the difficulties of his own life, Zero was still raised with care and love, and couldn't fathom that even as he held Kaname tightly in his arms, the pureblood was still expecting him to be playing a role and about to crush him any time soon. Zero couldn't initially even understand why Kaname had started to apologize, now.

"I'm the one who's sorry… I'm so sorry… I asked you to stay the other night because I was in pain and scared, but, but… it's not right… to cause you trouble… I apologize, Kiryuu-sama…"

The pureblood felt stupid as he spoke, hoping that this apology might placate the hunter in case Zero was still annoyed for his boldness in having asked for his protection, but at the same time fearing that perhaps the hunter might be displeased by the implied meaning that he didn't want to rely on him. Kaname thought he had a pretty clear idea of where they each stood now, but the hunter's gentleness never stopped unsettling him, and making him unsure of how far the mask went, and whether or not Zero might get angry at this or that wording when he spoke. This was too much like playing chess blindfolded and unsure of what pieces were still in game and where they stood on the board. And his recent failures at chess didn't help him feel any more confident in his rather rusty skills at diplomacy or verbal manipulation either. He practically held his breath until he heard Zero speak again, finally breathing again only when he noticed the hunter didn't seem angry.

"It's okay, Kaname. Shh, it's okay. I told you I'd protect you. I should never have broken that promise. I'm so sorry. I swear, it's okay to rely on me."

Oblivious to the reason for the vampire's extremely tense state, Zero could only try to reassure him… but the words might not have been the best ones to convey that meaning at a moment when the pureblood was so certain that the hunter had the exact opposite intentions. A ragged breath escaped the vampire's lips as he shivered, even more lost as he was now certain that he didn't even know what rules Zero wanted them to play by, an idea that unsettled him even more. If Zero had told him _not_ to rely on him, he'd have merely obeyed, but punishing him for asking for protection and then telling him to rely on him left the pureblood completely lost.

_N-no…_

_It's not okay, it's __**never**__ okay to rely on someone. _

It was already the case for him in the old world, where as a pureblood he was very much forced by birth to embrace a destiny of being put on a pedestal and kept away from all others.

But in the current world, as a slave, it was truer than ever. Relying on anyone would only bring trouble and pain, for himself at best, for them both at worst.

And yet, it was just impossible for Kaname to resist the comforting embrace of the hunter's arms pulling him close and checking his wounds. Reason had no hold over him with Zero's hands on his skin.

_I fall apart in your arms._

_Nothing will ever be the same again._

The realization of how broken he must be to accept the hunter's caresses despite his certainty that Zero could only be playing with him didn't even faze the pureblood anymore. Later, when he healed better and got more in control of his own thoughts, he would perhaps regret his utter weakness and despair further, but at the present moment he was just too exhausted. He felt like his very soul was in a million pieces. Even if those gentle arms were but a lie, the vampire still felt like his very survival right now depended on being held a little longer, a few more moments of warmth and care, regardless of how fake it might be. Regardless of how much he wanted to believe it was real, and could not.

Zero's question interrupted Kaname's troubled thoughts.

"Did they give you blood…?"

The pureblood looked so broken that it was hard to believe they had, but then, considering what must have happened the previous night, he must have been even more terribly wounded before, so Zero guessed they must have taken care of healing him at least partially before putting him back to work. Renewed anger boiled within him at the 'house', but he didn't have time to think of that, focusing instead on not further scaring the wounded pureblood that was now weakly answering his question in a hesitant and terribly tired voice.

"…yes …but not enough…"

_Never enough. Never._

_So that he'd constantly be drained and weakened, not to mention so that they wouldn't have to bother with the expenses._

He would hardly die of deprivation, so they pushed him constantly to his very limits, only giving him any blood if he was too wounded to be able to work, or if he was so weakened and thirsty that he collapsed and no beating could raise him. And even then, it was the bare minimum before he was forced to return to the living nightmare he was forced in constantly. Blood came from other slaves, which meant it cost money.

"Did they plan to make you work tonight in that state?!"

"…yes …it's not the… first time… it happens…"

Zero's throat tightened and he pulled the pureblood closer, cradling him gently.

"Well, it _**won't**_ happen. I'm not leaving you alone tonight."

Kaname's eyes widened softly in surprise, both because of the wording the hunter used, and because of the intense protectiveness in his voice, which seemed far too real and clashed with all that Kaname had been expecting.

The hunter's hand was soft on the pureblood's aching skin, running farther down his bruised back in a smooth caress.

_His trigger hand… how many vampires did it bring death to? _

Kaname couldn't help but shudder softly at the horrifying thought.

And yet, that same hand felt so soothingly cool as it slid further down on his back, resting paradoxically in a non-threatening manner on his lower back.  
Maybe it was a blessing that Kaname was so weakened and hurt that he couldn't bring himself to focus much longer –despite thinking he should— on the bitter side of even that soft caress: the impossibility of Zero's gentleness. Ironically, being so wounded helped because he could enjoy the touch better without thinking too hard, hopeless as he may be.

Zero radiated warmth into Kaname's heart, where the pureblood most needed it, but his hands felt pleasantly cool on Kaname's feverishly heated skin. He was everything the wounded vampire needed… and more, because on top of already providing the soothing presence that Kaname so desperately craved, Zero was about to prove once again how full of surprises he could be. The hunter leaned over the pureblood, pulling a little folding knife out of his pants' back-pocket. Kaname tensed instinctively, freezing at the sight, his body's ingrained instincts as well as the current fear making him inevitably expect the worst even though he'd already seen that knife before. When Zero smiled gently instead of hurting him, Kaname could only stare in stunned disbelief.

_Impossible… He couldn't mean to…_

But the hunter did exactly what Kaname thought so impossible. He flicked the little blade open and cut a short red line across his own wrist, before holding it up to the pureblood, looking embarrassed and unsure of what to say, strangely unsure now when he'd been so in control a second before.

"Here… you need it."

The hunter's voice still sounding so reassuring even as it broke the stillness of the air around them was the only thing to finally make the pureblood realize he'd forgotten to breathe for a moment.

"But… but… "

'_Why?' _The question may have been left unspoken, but it was obvious in Kaname's confused eyes.

Zero caressed the pureblood's hair with the hand that was still holding him, seemingly not understanding why Kaname hesitated. The vampire was actually trembling from need, and his eyes had taken the distinct red glow of bloodlust the instant the scent of blood hit the air, so why wasn't he drinking…?

"Kaname, drink… It's okay…"

"Kiryuu-sama… why do you offer me something that we both know I don't… deserve?"

The words were voiced cautiously, testing the waters, but they spoke volumes of how wary the pureblood was, to be unsure even when Zero insisted and offered something Kaname needed so desperately much.

Kaname was afraid not only that Zero might be testing him again, with the intention to dish out punishment if he accepted too easily, but on a deeper level, the pureblood couldn't help but be irrationally afraid that if he drank any more from Zero, he would only get more and more dependent on that man and the wonderful warmth only he seemed to radiate.

Zero wasn't so easily dissuaded however, nor did he understand why the pureblood resisted, and so he insisted, gently pushing on.

"You _do_ deserve it! I'm giving it to you by my own choice, you don't have to hesitate." In a lower voice, much more uncertain sounding, the hunter added, "Kaname… I may not be able to undo what happened yesterday, but if I can help you feel a tiny bit better, even if just physically… I'd be happy to." As he spoke, he pressed his bleeding wrist to the pureblood's lips, and need allied with utter starvation got the best of Kaname's reluctance.

The vampire was far too wounded, in far too much pain and too weakened; he could only succumb to the irrepressible need devouring him from within. Bloodlust took over and he desperately pressed his lips to the hunter's wrist, tongue instantly lapping at the blood spilled, an involuntary choked moan rising from his throat as the glorious taste spread in his mouth and invaded all of his senses. His eyes burned, wet once more, this time under the effect of the powerful sensation.  
He may loathe the weakness making him surrender yet another bit of whatever was left of him to this man, but he couldn't possibly resist a need this primary, especially in a moment when he had so little control over himself… He clung to the other's arm, hands trembling as they held on with all he had.

Only a fraction of a second later, did the horrifying realization manage to breach through the fog of bloodlust and Kaname noticed that he had his mouth right over the actual wound, tongue hungrily licking the cut in direct contact. His first instinct was to back away as fast as he could, but Zero had seen the sudden terror on the pureblood's bruised face, and held him with his other arm in a firm embrace, not letting him run away.

"Shh, shh, it's okay… You're so drugged right now that it doesn't matter… Just keep drinking."

The impossible acceptance was so unexpected that Kaname didn't quite know how to react. On one hand, it was true, regardless of the properties his pureblood saliva would normally have, the anti-vampire drugs pumped into his body made it impossible for him to turn anyone whether he wished to or not, even when he _hadn't_ just received his new shots, but still… a hunter would normally never allow a pureblood's saliva to come in contact with their blood stream, just out of principle. _But then again, no hunter would ever offer his blood to one either… _Zero was just completely different, which also made him awfully unpredictable.

Kaname shivered softly, the instinctive terror refusing to subside so easily, but the terrible hunger was still there, burning in his bloodshot eyes, and when punishment didn't come, and the hunter's other hand merely continued to trace comforting little circles as he caressed the back of the pureblood's head, Kaname broke down again. Lips wrapping themselves of their own accord around the offered wrist once more, he sucked greedily, not wasting a single drop, his whole body trembling as the delicious liquid trickled down his throat with each slow draught he took, trying to take it as slowly as his hunger would permit, to enjoy as much as he could, knowing the moment couldn't possibly last.

He expected the hunter to break the contact any time now, telling him –either gently or _not_ – that it was enough, but that didn't happen. Kaname grew more puzzled with each instant, almost not daring to drink, each movement of his tongue or lips hesitant. _How much more can I drink without angering him…? What if this is a new test?_  
His gaze flickered back and forth to the hunter's face, trying to scan the other's features and make a guess, while instinctively avoiding to meet his eyes, by fear of seeing coldness or anger there.

But when their gazes did meet, all that Kaname could discern in Zero's eyes was a terribly deep sense of guilt. The hunter was looking at the starved pureblood drinking hesitantly –not merely looking, but doing so with such intensity that Kaname's heart skipped a beat.

Zero didn't know exactly how far into exhaustion he might have let the other drain him, but his heart and his honor commanded him to repair the damage he'd caused, at least as much as he possibly could. _He wouldn't stop him. Not after the previous night's failure. Let Kaname drink as much as he needed, no matter how much that may be. _If this was the only way… then so be it.  
Ultimately, their respective situations made that Zero was still completely in control of the situation, and there was no real danger to him, especially with how weakened Kaname was, but… it was important for him to submit himself to it, to at least try and help the pureblood heal.

Kaname was torn once more between his wishes and his reason. His body desperately needed as much blood as it could get both to repair itself and due to his constant state of undernourishment, but even still partially dazed and not quite there, he knew better than drink more than a bare minimum and risk angering the hunter. He may be extremely surprised by the guilt he could easily read in the hunter's eyes, but it was too unexpected and to incomprehensible for him and made him even more suspicious that Zero might be faking it, either as a new test or merely out of cruelty. Whatever may be the hunter's intentions, it was very difficult for Kaname to trust him, even more so when still freshly wounded from the previous night. After taking a few more hesitant draughts, Kaname pulled back carefully, thanking the hunter in a whisper, unsure of what to say and just trying to look like he wasn't just as starved. He'd drank just enough to feel a bit less bad, but it was nowhere near the amount his body actually needed. As a matter of fact, he'd been pushed so far over the years that even if he could possibly drain Zero of all his blood several times, he still wouldn't have enough to replenish all that his body needed. So many years of deprivations and misery couldn't be erased easily.

_But it was still better than nothing, by far_. And it was still more than he would have otherwise had, as it was unlikely the 'house' would have given him one more drop until the next time they had no way around it. Now at least the throbbing in his freshly defanged jaw wasn't as dramatic. Still nervous and unsure of what to say and what he might be expected to do to _'thank' _the hunter, Kaname breathed shallowly, shrinking in the other's embrace and fighting the exhaustion that was still plaguing him, his tired body trying to process the small but delicious amount of blood he'd just had.

Zero didn't know exactly how much blood a vampire might need to drink in such conditions, but he was rather surprised that Kaname had stopped so much sooner than he'd expected. He had half a mind to try to get the pureblood to drink more, but he didn't want to seem like he was forcing him, and assumed Kaname probably knew what he was doing. He set the vampire down onto the mattress gently, and got up, intending to take a quick bath and wrap his wrist.

Seeing the hunter's intentions, Kaname tried to get up to prepare his bath, but Zero ordered him to stay in bed and rest as he needed, and the pureblood didn't dare disobey. Soon enough, the repetitive and calming sound of the water falling in the bathtub, coming from the crack of the bathroom door that Zero hadn't fully closed was the only noise to be heard in the room apart from Kaname's shallow breathing. Tiredness won over the pureblood's last barriers, lulling him into a much needed sleep despite his fear of the hunter coming back to find him unconscious and possibly get angry or do something.

--

The pureblood finally woke up over four hours later. The exhaustion had been such that not even Zero's return from the bathroom had awakened him. The drugs in Kaname's blood were strong, even more so than usual since he'd just gotten his new dose, and as such his senses were terribly dulled. He opened his eyes and quickly squeezed them shut again when the light invaded them, making him feel even dizzier. He'd been confused enough initially that for an instant he wasn't sure where he was, then he noticed the coverlet and the hunter's jacket over him, keeping him warm. His heart ached when he noticed that his first automatic urge was to bury his face in the jacket and inhale the hunter's calming scent, still so strangely soothing even after the recent brutal events. He forced himself not to give in, and scanned the room, still dizzy. Only then did he notice Zero was actually sitting on the bed next to him, a mere few inches to the side, his back against the headboard, the chess book in his hand. Kaname jolted at the realization, as if he'd been stung by something, unconsciously scooting a little farther.

Zero only smiled that beautiful, reassuring smile of his - the one that made Kaname's heart ache with a need he didn't understand, but which he instinctively knew was impossible and all the more painful for how unattainable it was.

"Feeling better after a little nap?"

The hunter had meant it as a genuine question, but Kaname couldn't help reading much more into it and quickly lowered his head, falling back into a pattern of submission that was usually one of the few things that prevented him from suffering even more abuse in his daily life.

"Kiryuu-sama, I'm so sorry I fell asleep when I should have been entertaining yo-"

"No, no, don't worry about that! I was reading while I waited for you to rest a little. If you're feeling better, I thought we could eat a little something?"

The pureblood looked puzzled once more, and then flushed quickly once his stomach was quick to react with eagerness to the idea of food, rumbling in an embarrassing manner. He'd been passed out or out of the house for 'repairs' for most of the day, and had missed the hour to get the disgusting daily meal the handlers gave all slaves. Blood was vital for vampires for certain nutrients within it that their bodies couldn't obtain by another method, but it didn't replace actual food, it was completely different, and as such, Kaname was quite hungry. Zero chuckled softly at the sound of the pureblood's stomach, unwittingly making Kaname blush even harder before the hunter leaned off the side of the bed and pulled up a bag he'd brought. Kaname had been too shaken and dazed to notice it there before.

Now that Zero was pulling things out of it and unwrapping them from the protective paper he'd placed around them to conceal the contents, Kaname was able to smell them a bit better despite his dulled senses. His mouth automatically watered, and he couldn't help but part his lips slightly and draw a shaky breath in awe. Zero was uncovering all manner of delicacies and snacks, Mediterranean fig preserves, Italian dry salami, various small cheeses, fresh bread, caper butter and other various things that each seemed more marvelous than the other at the eyes of the deprived pureblood.

The fact that all the food Kaname normally got was the repulsive brown grub that handlers mixed with water to give them each day –feeding them as if they were livestock was one more thing that the current society viewed as 'natural' since vampires were considered beasts— made all those foods seem even more heavenly.

Zero's voice brought the pureblood back to reality, making him snap his mouth shut, as it had started to open in awe at the sight of the foods.

"I remember you said before that you liked salami when you were a kid, so I thought I'd bring a sort of a picnic bag today with various snacks…"

The hunter's voice kind of died out by the end of the sentence, as he left unspoken what the guilt in his eyes still expressed quite well: he'd hoped that bringing something special would cheer the pureblood up and make him feel better, something Zero had realized would inevitably be necessary after the night of horror Kaname spent. Not that Kaname's other nights were not filled with horror as well, but from the way the pureblood had spoken of the times when groups came, Zero could tell well that it was far worse than the norm. He'd spent quite a bit of time earlier that day thinking up what to bring. He'd taken his lunch break to run errands and pick up things to bring to the pureblood, such as the food, as well as their chess set and the book he'd gotten for Kaname before.

The hunter was now pulling a bottle of wine and a corkscrew from the bag, leaving in it a small square package from a popular bakery, containing their dessert, and setting the bag down on the ground next to the bed. He couldn't help chuckling softly at the sight of the marveled pureblood.

"Like what you see?"

Kaname did. So very much. His heart was thrumming fast in his chest, unsure whether it was safe to just give in and enjoy the moment, or whether he should be particularly on his guard, expecting any possible tests. It was immensely tempting to just sit closer and accept the delicacies right away, but the additional layer of uncertainty was inevitable.

The hunter may not know how deep the pureblood's fears ran, but he could easily tell that Kaname was intensely nervous and hesitant, even now. He wasn't sure what it might take to rebuild that beginning of something that had existed between them. Kaname may still have been terribly tense before too, but until last night he'd at least started to open up enough to be able to hold conversations without jolting every five minutes –unless Zero approached suddenly, of course.  
Truth to be said, Kaname had never been relaxed or actually calm in his presence, but he _had_ started to visibly open up in some ways. Yet, Zero couldn't find that tentative intimacy in the air now, which further reinforced his feeling that he'd screwed up big time.

Wrapping an arm around the pureblood's tense shoulders, careful to make the movement extra gentle and reassuring, Zero tugged Kaname closer, inevitably wishing the pureblood didn't tremble so much whenever he touched him. Setting the foods down on an oversized linen napkin unfolded on the bed before them, Zero motioned for Kaname to pick whatever he liked, and proceeded to uncork the bottle and produce stemware out of the bag on the ground. Each wine cup was individually wrapped in the large napkins, both to conceal them and to protect them from breaking –Zero had after all carried the bag around for a good part of the day, practically hissing away his coworkers when they got curious over it.

"I'm sorry, the wine isn't cold, but I'm sure you won't mind much?"

Kaname looked up quickly, abandoning his admiration of the dry salami and the figs, shaking his head and immediately insisting that he was fine with anything Zero wanted or did… Something that inevitably made the man frown a little, wishing he could get the pureblood less on edge.

Zero poured wine for them both and had Kaname hold the glasses while he set the bottle down and proceeded to cut them slices of bread, cheese and salami so that they could mix and match at will with the other things he'd brought. With the preparations done, Zero took back his own cup, and raised it slightly, offering a toast a little hesitantly.

"To possible future promises, which won't be broken."

He wasn't quite sure whether it had conveyed the reassurance he meant to give the pureblood, or whether it had been an utterly stupid thing to say on light of the recent events, but he could only hope, and so he touched his cup to Kaname's before drinking.

Feeling slightly better now that he'd slept a little, Kaname managed to remain somewhat unfazed even though the hunter's choice of words for the toast inevitably sprung a hopeless image to his mind.

_You are right, Kiryuu-sama. You won't have to make any more promises, because I won't ever be foolish enough to ask anything of you again. I've realized well how far I overstepped my boundaries the first time._

The pureblood's eyes lost themselves on the surface of the bed for a moment, but utterly depressing as his thoughts may be, the sight of the foods laid before him was still just as succulent and irresistible. The sight of them and the mouth-watering scent provided a small comfort when Kaname lowered his head to conceal the deep despair shining in his wet eyes. He was quick to imitate the hunter's movements and bring the glass to his lips, however – he may have spent ten years in captivity, but pureblood children were already well learned in the ways of the world even at the age when his innocent life had ended. Back then, he'd already seen enough social activities to know that he would be insulting the other if he refused to drink after a toast. The last thing he wanted was to displease Kiryuu-sama when he was being so gentle, much less convey that he didn't welcome his toast. He fell in step with the hunter, drinking at the same pace as he did, and only moving for the snacks once Zero did so as well by putting a little slice of salami in his mouth.

Nervous as he may be, no fear in the world could have stopped the pureblood from finding the snacks one of the most delicious things he'd ever eaten. Of course, considering he hadn't really had any _proper_ food in years, aside from things Zero had brought before, it hardly was a surprising matter. Each taste, each mouthful of one or the other items was pure delight. A slight little bit more confident now that Zero continually urged him to try this or that thing, Kaname spread some of the soft caper butter on a little chunk of French bread, carefully balancing the little serving spoon in one hand and the bread and his glass in the other. It was wonderful with the salami, the capers contrasting beautifully with the meat and the peppercorns to be found in a slice or another. The figs were also delightful, most likely having been preserved right after being picked at the peak of their ripeness, and then prepared with a trickle of a subtle lavender honey to accentuate their sweetness. They melted in Kaname's mouth, and if he wasn't still carefully stealing glances at his unexpected benefactor, he might have rolled his eyes up at how delicious it was. An assortment of different types of olives with different fillings and a variety of other little _amuse-bouches_ provided an additional number of pleasant discoveries of olfactory and gustatory joy, in some cases because the pureblood rediscovered a taste he liked in childhood and had thought he would never get to enjoy again, and in other cases because he just discovered brand new tastes that he'd either never known before or merely had known at too early an age and couldn't remember. Everything was just perfect and delicious, to the point that Kaname could feel his eyes growing moist with emotion again, something that made him feel vaguely stupid since it was after all food, but… it was such a pleasant and innocent delight that he normally never had access to…  
To his surprise however, he found that his eyes were getting far blurrier than he expected, and when he rubbed then with the back of a hand, he was shocked to see his vision blur further and double for a moment, instead of getting better. He was also feeling unexpectedly hot, but then, the drugs often made him feverish, and he guessed he must have difficulties with wine, not being normally used to drinking. He eyed his now nearly empty wine cup with a certain worry, his gaze travelling up to Zero's, right in time to see the hunter refilling his own. The man looked up as well, and, mistaking Kaname's movements, quickly offered to refill his cup as well.

Needless to say, Kaname didn't dare to refuse, and just swallowed dry, trying to control his labored breathing and bring the flush on his feverish face under control enough that Zero would just assume it was because of how battered the pureblood still was, and not because he didn't want to accept the offering.

Kaname put another marinated olive in his mouth and took a new bite of the piece of bread in his hand before taking a sip of his wine, hoping that at least it might help with the odd burning in his throat. It didn't help, but he strived to conceal it, too focused on enjoying the rare feast, and not wanting to seem ungrateful. His head was feeling increasingly light however, and the hand he held his cup with was trembling more and more. He finished his wine quickly and put the cup down, making it seem like he just wanted to use both hands to serve himself and eat, while in truth it was to better hide the shaking.

The pureblood's vision swam, and he was grateful for the fact that Zero was pretty hungry as well, and currently busy at the task of cutting more salami and making himself a sandwich, or he would inevitably have noticed the moment when Kaname swayed lightly before regaining his balance. They were both sitting, so the vampire wouldn't have fallen very far, but it was embarrassing to appear this unbalanced. Not to mention that right about now Kaname wasn't feeling very comfortable about displaying even more weakness than he already had, and would prefer if he could avoid the hunter noticing how odd he was feeling.  
It also helped that Zero had realized well how nervous Kaname was tonight, and had been trying to not stare at him so much, hoping that less scrutiny might help the vampire to relax. As a result, however, the hunter was missing various signs of discomfort on Kaname's face, and other details he'd have normally caught on much sooner.

Whatever may be causing the bout of renewed dizziness, it was getting strong enough that Kaname realized his hands were shaking too much to spread any of the different toppings on the bread, and focused instead on the salami slices and the marinated olives.

_It wasn't fair… It really wasn't!_

On top of all the horrible things Kaname already had to deal with daily, it really wasn't fair that for once, when he had a moment of rare respite –however much tarnished by worry it might be— and the chance to eat something delicious and light-years away from the repulsive rations he normally had... it really wasn't fair that right when he had a chance to enjoy that little respite and to feel better, his body should play such tricks on him. He clenched his fist against the bed sheets, angry at his own body and feeling miserable in general, eyes burning hidden behind the curly locks that shadowed his attractively flushed face as he bent forward, his head spinning more and more and making him feel slightly nauseous again. Pressing his nails into the palms of his hands hard, the pureblood refused to let his dizziness win. _He was going to enjoy the food and the peaceful moment, no matter what happened!_ He had enough worrying to do with not knowing what _Kiryuu-sama_ might do, he found it utterly unfair that his own body should make things even harder than they already were.

The problem was, the light-headedness and the odd feeling weren't affecting only his body; they were making thinking clearly extremely difficult, and right at a moment where Kaname particularly felt the need to carefully weight what he might say or do.

Worse yet, he'd been trying very hard to take an important decision, and the way even the somewhat dim light was burning his eyes and making his head spin even worse wasn't helping. Neither was the way his throat was burning. He knew he was thirsty, he _always_ was, and the small amount of blood he'd drunk earlier wasn't enough to quench all of his need, but that wasn't it. This felt different from the burning of pure thirst. It was something else completely unrelated to the need for blood, and he didn't know exactly what was causing it.

It's not that it was something he'd never experienced before –he'd suffered all sorts of unpleasant experiences in his life, and random symptoms right at the worst moments were nothing new for him, but the problem was precisely that: he'd had so many strange experiences that he couldn't quite tell what caused each thing or what might be causing his current problem. Usually, by the end of a difficult night he was too close to unconsciousness to be able to discern much of whatever symptoms he might have, and the handlers never cared to inform him of anything. To them, he was nothing more than merchandise, and if he felt sick they were simply more likely to take advantage of it, so it was best to hide it.

He'd have thought his 'benefactor' was drugging him further with something strange in the food or in the wine, if not for the fact that there was no need for that, and that his gut feeling told him it wasn't the case.  
And at least, he could breathe a small sigh of relief in ruling out the possibility of some fast spreading disease; while there were actually a few that in rare cases _could_ pass from humans to vampires –and to a very weakened pureblood, in even rarer cases— he wasn't out of his mind enough to not know that no disease could progress that fast.

He was, however, hindered in his ability to think properly enough that right at that moment things that would normally seem a dreadfully bad idea suddenly appeared feasible, which was a very dangerous combination.

All the more so because of the decision he was trying to take despite his increasingly impaired judgment – a decision which could have dire consequences. From the very first day, Kaname had been afraid that Zero might suddenly change his mind about being nice and just bed him with the same brutality that all the other customers displayed –a rape that Kaname was sure would break one of the very last little refuges of hope and peace he still had in the farthest depths of his mind.  
And yet, right about now, with his illusions and hopes shattered by the brutal night he'd suffered, and with his mind clouded by dizziness and a fog that seemed to be numbing his every thought, Kaname was starting to think that maybe it would hurt less to just bite the bullet once and for all and free himself from that constant fear of not knowing _when_ Zero might finally do it.

_Even if it meant he would be shattering by his own hands everything he might still have left._ After the previous night, Kaname wasn't sure he still _did_ have anything left, as it seemed more and more that Zero was just playing with him.

Truth to be said, Kaname had expected it to be the case from the start, but with each of the hunter's kind visits, a strange and unexpected hope had begun to form in his heart, and Zero's repeated gentleness had made it easier for the pureblood to convince himself that perhaps there was more to it than his fears told him.

Now however, the pureblood didn't have enough energy left to cling to anything, much less to a deluded hope of which he was having more and more trouble convincing himself that it had any basis to begin with. It was so much easier to just believe what he assumed to be the brutal truth: that this hunter was exactly like all the others, aside from the fact that he was a better actor and could fool him longer, almost managing to make him believe things were really different.

_Nothing could ever be different. Not for me._

After all, didn't they say it exactly how it was?

'_You deserve it, vampire!'_

Kaname clenched his teeth, biting back a sob that had threatened to form in his throat.

Was being a vampire really such a horrible crime? He certainly hadn't asked to be born that way. But he couldn't change who he was either. And in the end, whatever he may think mattered little in the face of the entire world believing it to be the worst crime possible.

Desperate and at the very end of his rope, the pureblood did something he would never have dared to do, had he been sober and able to think straight. He straightened himself, put on a seductive smile, and stumbled closer to the hunter on the bed, sliding a leg over him to straddle him.

Zero had been sipping his wine while eyeing the pureblood from the corner of his eye, trying not to stare at him too much, but wondering silently why Kaname seemed to be getting more agitated. When the pureblood came closer, he was surprised enough but didn't think too much of it… until Kaname practically sat on his lap, straddling him with his legs on each side, facing Zero right up close, with that adorable blush on his cheeks and that half-sleepy and half-hungry smile on his flushed lips.

Zero had hoped that the food and wine might help in cheering the pureblood up, but he hadn't expected Kaname to open up _so much_, so fast. Not that it was unpleasant, far from that, but it was very surprising, especially seeing how much it clashed with the way the pureblood seemed afraid of him earlier.

A part of Zero, more rational and careful, told him that this seemed uncharacteristically bold, and that the pureblood was probably forcing himself for whatever reason, but… much as Zero wanted to be extremely gentle and careful with Kaname, he was still a hot-blooded male. And right about now, some _very_ male areas of his anatomy were getting particularly hot-blooded, making it near impossible for the silver-haired man to pay much heed to any warnings signs.

Especially since Zero was only wearing the plush bathrobe he'd taken from the bathroom earlier, and Kaname was very much naked, having dropped the bed coverlet and jacket he'd been using to cover his modesty while they ate. The pureblood's irresistibly perfect buttocks were pressed flush against a part of Zero's anatomy that twitched in response and was hardening fast, much to the embarrassment of the hunter.

At least, he _was_ embarrassed until Kaname chuckled seductively in response to the hunter's arousal, and started grinding. After that, embarrassment –along with pretty much everything else— became a faraway thought, completely forgotten at the face of much more important things, such as the delicious way Kaname's skin felt both cool and burning at once, and the way he parted his wet lips in a coquettish little gasp in response to the hunter's physical reaction, before putting on a cutely coy façade that didn't fool anyone.

"Hmmm, Kiryuu-sama. I knew you wanted me. Why didn't you say sooner?"

The way he breathed the words out huskily, almost touching the hunter's lips before leaning back and pressing himself more fully on the hard body beneath him… it nearly made Zero lose what reason he had left right there.

Most of the time, it was a good thing that Kaname was such an excellent actor. It allowed him to have a near perfect mask of submission and obedience at all times, hiding his anger and misery somewhat and saving him from being brutalized by handlers and customers alike even _more _often than he already was.  
In this particular case, however, it was a rather sad thing, because Zero would probably have managed to rein in the impulse to tumble the pureblood back and make him his, if he'd had any idea of how close to panic Kaname actually was, beneath the layer of artful seduction he displayed.

But as Kaname's mask was nearly flawless, the only thing threatening to betray his absolute terror was the way his heart was racing in his chest, beating so rapidly that the pureblood thought it might be audible all the way from the corridor.  
Normally, uncertainty and the ensuing fear made it that the pureblood wasn't sure how to act in Zero's presence. But now that he'd made his decision, however self-destructive it may be, it was just a matter of putting up a mask and fitting into the role, something he found much easier to do than the decision process itself.

If his mask did not shatter, it should enable him to finally see the truth of it all, and to unmask _'Kiryuu-sama'_, putting an end to the painful illusion that maybe he wasn't like all the other hunters.

_If clinging to hope hurt so much, certainly losing all hope would be freeing? Submitting to that rape by his own choice, so that he would stop hoping at all, and never again live through the pain of believing in something that was bound to be impossible?_

Where he'd been terribly wrong, was in thinking that his mask would truly hold through such a horrifying thing… and in thinking that after all he'd suffered, he might still have in himself the strength to willingly destroy what little he still had left.  
The moment Zero's restraint and hesitation snapped, and his hands flew for Kaname's waist to better pin him in place, lips running along the brunet's collarbone and then downwards, panic overcame the pureblood completely. All seduction abandoned now, Kaname's mind seemed to freeze at the sensation of Zero's hands holding him in place, something the hunter did without further thought because it just felt so right to hold onto the pureblood's hips, but which to Kaname seemed like fetters holding him down to prevent any escape.

Zero's arms wrapped around the pureblood's waist, a hand sliding down his buttocks to cup one of the cheeks , lips brushing along his pectoral, unsure of what might have motivated the vampire's sudden approach but far too delighted by it to ask himself too many questions. He'd desired Kaname for so long, barely managing to hold back on the intense lust that kept clamoring for him to take what he'd paid for after all. Zero had refused all along, not wanting to be like all the others and just take him by force. But to have the pureblood willing and in his arms was impossible to resist. He was sliding a hand up the pureblood's thigh, just about to push him down on his back when he finally noticed something was amiss.

However much distracted Zero may be by the luscious body in his arms, he was far from being blind or insensitive, and caught on right away when Kaname had a sort of a convulsive spasm right as he pushed his legs further apart.

All of a sudden, things that he'd overlooked before became obvious –particularly, the fact that the pureblood was trembling uncontrollably, and had ceased all grinding to instead thrash softly in the hunter's arms as if he was desperately trying to escape but was too terrified and lacked the strength to push out of the other's hold. Zero's gaze rushed up to meet Kaname's, and he realized with surprise that the vampire's eyes were dark and filled with nothing but tears and unbridled terror.

_What?! But…_

It clashed so utterly completely with the intense seductiveness that the pureblood had lavished on him a moment earlier that Zero initially didn't know how to react or what to think of the sudden change. That uncertainty delayed the hunter's reaction, and in turn, the fact that he was still tightly held within the other's arms made Kaname irrationally panic even more. It was ironic that something that would have normally soothed him when Zero held him more gently was so terribly different at the present moment, because of the suggestive position and the complete lack of doubts about what was about to happen to him.

Not knowing what Zero might be thinking, Kaname automatically stuck to his fears, assuming rape was imminent and that his foolish seduction idea had destroyed what little time he still might have left before the inevitable. Ever since he'd made his move, it seemed that the dizziness and the light-headedness had worsened tenfold, making him unable to even think clearly and unsure of whether his decision had been the most stupid thing he'd done in a while or merely something inevitable. Right about now, he wasn't exactly able to think at all, panic flooding his already foggy mind even more and making his vision darken in a strange and unexpected manner.

Zero's arms slid up the pureblood's back, intending to reassure him, but Kaname didn't see it that way. Not realizing it was meant as support and merely feeling even more completely trapped, he pushed frantically against the arms that meant to stop him from falling, unable to free himself because the drugs made him too weak to even get out of the embrace.

At that point, Zero understood at last that he was what was directly causing the pureblood's terror, and let go suddenly, but Kaname only had the time to throw himself on his back and crawl away on the bed as fast as he could before a veil of darkness overcame him and he lost consciousness, falling down on the very edge of the bed, completely limp and lividly pale.

After a moment of hesitation, not wanting to scare him even more but too worried to just watch from afar, Zero finally rushed to his side, calling his name. Kaname was out cold and didn't reply or give any sign that he could hear him, but what worried Zero even further was that, unlike the previous time the pureblood fainted, this time he looked far paler and unresponsive. Even worse, when Zero pressed two fingers to Kaname's neck just above the thick leather collar that permanently covered it, he noticed with horror that the pureblood's heartbeat was barely perceptible.

Zero had been a hunter for several years now, he knew quite a good deal about vampires and the little physiological differences between them and the humans. He knew it was normal for Kaname to be naturally paler and have a body temperature average a little bit lower than that of a human, but it wasn't anywhere near the way things currently were. For a moment he thought against all logic that the vampire was dead because he couldn't feel a pulse –he finally caught it, but it was so faint it was barely there. On top of that, the pureblood still seemed feverish, but his whole body was covered in tiny beads of cold sweat, softly shaken by tiny shivers that could only be perceived when touching his skin.

After a quick debate of whether he'd make things worse or not by picking him up, Zero decided that Kaname was unlikely to notice at the moment anyway, and pulled him into his arms, trying to warm him up and awaken him. It was to no avail. Neither that, not any of the various things the hunter tried in the following half an hour had any effect whatsoever on the unconscious pureblood.

It was Zero's turn to be horrified, not even knowing what might have caused the problem nor what to do to help, and getting to the point where he was irrationally afraid that Kaname might not wake up again at all. His stomach had lurched in complete horror when he'd thought him dead for a second, but whatever relief he might have felt when noticing it wasn't the case was now fading fast. _What if he __**is**__ dying?!_  
He knew that was extremely unlikely since Kaname was a pureblood, but he wasn't sure what had happened the previous night, nor what effects the anti-vampire drugs might have over slaves on the long run, and irrational fear was impossible to avoid.

The horrible prospect was what finally made him decide to do something he'd much rather have avoided if he'd had a choice; he got up, leaving the food that could pass for his own but quickly hiding back in his bag any items that might be difficult to explain –such as the chess set he'd pulled out for later and the book—, then rushed for the door and rang to call a handler.

It was a credit to Zero's maturity and level-headedness that he was actually able to fake a nonchalant look and appear so unconcerned as the handler came in and took a look at Kaname.  
He could not, however, conceal the befuddlement on his face when the man heard his story, took one look at the two cups and the wine bottle abandoned on their side on the bed, and then broke down laughing.

"Oh sir, I mean no disrespect, but you wasted wine on _that_?"

'_That'_ being the unconscious pureblood, of course. The man had gestured towards Kaname as he spoke, with a look that was both slightly disgusted and utterly amused.

"I… uhm, I…"

"That's why he went down. The anti-vampire drugs don't mix too well with alcohol. It's happened before, though it's rare since people don't usually waste… But it will screw them bloodsuckers up quite nicely, depending on the type of alcohol!"

Zero flushed slightly, feeling stupid and utterly guilty for having given Kaname wine right when the pureblood was most susceptible to the possible side-effects. _No_ _wonder he'd been strange…_  
He opened his mouth to try and come up with an excuse quickly for why he'd bother giving wine to a slave, but the handler was already making his own assumptions, thinking Zero just wanted to get the vampire drunk for fun, and nudged his arm –with a smile full of a complicity that repulsed Zero— before whispering, "You don't have to waste nice expensive things like that, sir. If you wanna see him even more trashed, we can provide additional drugs that will mess him up real nice. You need to use more on him than on just any other slave because his blood is stronger, but that's about it…"

It was also a credit to Zero that he managed to hold in the sudden intense urge he had to punch the man square in the face. Being protective of a slave was really badly viewed, and for Kaname's own safety, he had to keep in mind that he wouldn't be able to protect him when he wasn't there, and so appearing like any other customer was the safest way to not attract unwanted problems for the pureblood. So Zero forced himself to swallow back his loathing and merely choke out a "Thanks, but that won't be necessary."

The handler didn't receive any commissions for such services, so he didn't really care to push the extra products, and simply continued, "Sure, just call if you change your mind. Now, do you want me to beat him awake for you or do you want to leave him that way? He'll wake up eventually if you hit him enough. Although if you prefer, we can take care of the punishment ourselves later at no extra charge."

The word 'punishment' as well as the sick sound of it as it rolled off the man's tongue with a sadistic eagerness sent a chill to Zero's bones, making him inevitably ask, automatically, "Punishment…?"

"Well, yeah… for passing out while he should still be servicin' you and all, sir. People usually like to do it themselves, but we can take over that part if you're short on time or something. Hey, if you prefer doing it yourself, we have any tools you might want at your dispo-"

"Yes." Zero interrupted the man suddenly, feeling like he might lose it and actually hit him if he heard anymore. "Yes, I think I'll do it myself. But I have my own err, tools. And I think we're wasting my time I paid for in advance. So if you'd kindly leave…"

The words left Zero's mouth hurriedly, in an annoyed tone but nearly choking him with the bitterness and disgust. Not to mention the superhuman effort it took him not to give that handler his worst glare ever. But luckily, the mention of_ paid time being wasted_ was like a holy mantra for handlers, and the man quickly obeyed and buggered off, none too soon in Zero's opinion.

Now that the annoyance –and potential threat— was gone, the anger remained within Zero, but above all, a deep sadness was filling him. He sat on the foot of the bed and watched the pale pureblood in silence, feeling the prickling of tears in his eyes as the loathsome words of the handler ran through his mind, reminding him once more of how dire the pureblood's living conditions were.

Almost as if it was moving of its own accord, Zero's hand came to rest on Kaname's head, caressing softly the unruly locks of hair, feeling the pureblood's shivering skin and the dampness of his sweat slightly cold beneath his fingers.

"How can you have survived so long in such horrible conditions…? I wouldn't have thought it was possible for anyone to survive ten years like that. How can you still be yourself and not even more broken?"

It was a whisper meant to no one in particular, as the person the question was directed to was still unconscious and there was no one else to hear Zero's voice nearly breaking as he caressed the pureblood's hair with the utmost gentleness and care, as if he was afraid that Kaname might be made of glass and would shatter at the slightest movement.

It wasn't that far off from reality, in a certain way, since the pureblood's delicate build and pale beauty enhanced his frail appearance. Furthermore, the drugs did actually render him far weaker than a human, making even surviving each night a dreadful challenge. Kaname's head lolled on the edge of the bed, a look of suffering on his livid face, graceful lips slightly parted as if he couldn't get enough air. The mix of unexpected innocence and frailness made him look vaguely like a child having a nightmare, and compelled Zero to wake him up. But sadly, the hunter had no idea how to do so, and wasn't about to try the method suggested by the handler, under any circumstances.  
He caressed the pureblood's soft full lips with the ball of his thumb gently, and was a little surprised when he felt the urge to kiss him. If things were different, it would already be a shocking urge coming from a hunter –no one kissed a slave, they were all in the belief that a slave's mouth existed solely for _another use_…— but far from being shocked for those reasons, Zero was shocked because he was still feeling guilty for earlier. The look of absolute terror in the pureblood's eyes as he thrashed in his arms was firmly etched on Zero's memory.

_I thought I was different, somehow. That I had some great idealistic belief or something, and that it somehow made me better than the other people who come here. But you seem to fear my touch as much as you fear theirs…_

The hunter ran his fingers between the chocolate-colored curls with utmost care, tucking one behind the delicate shell of a pale ear.

_What were you doing, Kaname? Were you trying to prove something to yourself, or did you think you owed me something, that you had to repay me with your body for things as simple as food?_

He didn't even know what might have been going on in the vampire's head, or why he'd tried to seduce him despite how utterly afraid of his touch he clearly was. Not knowing didn't change how guilty he felt for not having noticed Kaname's fear sooner, though. Guilt for that, guilt for the previous night… Zero was burning with it.

The only feeling that could rival all that guilt was the deep, boundless urge to protect the unconscious pureblood.  
Screw trying to think rationally and analyze anything. Screw wondering what was or wasn't acceptable. The way everybody treated the pureblood was wrong, wrong and utterly inacceptable. Screw _'the order of things' _and what was considered _'right'_ by that screwed up society. He already thought so before, but this incident only cemented the idea even more strongly in his mind.

"Kaname…" As he spoke, the hunter couldn't help but gently pull the pureblood into his arms, however ashamed he may be to know that perhaps it wouldn't have been a good idea if the other had been conscious. "I can't save you from this nightmare, but at least whenever I am here visiting you, I will do all I can to protect you from any harm."

In light of his still recent failure, Zero didn't dare make –even to himself— an actual promise that he didn't know yet whether he would be able to uphold, so instead he merely pressed his lips softly to the pureblood's forehead in a chaste kiss, before gathering him in his arms and moving him onto a more comfortable position, covering him with the jacket and coverlet once more.

_._

_._

_[tbc]_

_

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_HIM based chapter title as usual. :D It's a line from the song "Gone with the sin". _

_I'm in a hurry right now, but I might come back to ramble more in the notes later if I have a moment. XD;; *wanted to post the chapter today, has to rush out super fast now or she'll be late*^^;_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	18. Behind the Crimson Door

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 18 – "Behind the Crimson Door."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.  
**_

_*SO wanted to finally get to using that chapter title, finally reached it* 8D;; *lol*  
And yes, "Behind the Crimson Door" is also a song by HIM. :D _

_I'm SO sorry it took like a month between the last chapter and this one. D: I was busy for a while, and then just kept trying to organize bits and chunks because it has to all work with some stuff that happens in the next chapters.  
There's three or so chapters that I was wondering whether to cut in two or three, and it ended up taking forever, because some of the events in it are pretty important for the story and I didn't want to break the pace. ^^;_

_This chapter is a bit slow at first, but it should hopefully have some points you'll find interesting, particularly in the way Kaname's thoughts and reactions are evolving.  
And it's all also build up for some of the various things that will happen next. ;3  
_

_Btw, just as a reminder just in case, but Kaname & Yuuki scenes in CoB are not meant as a pairing. The pairing in CoB is Zero x Kaname. (And partially also Kaname x Zero.)  
Just mentioning just in case, to avoid people getting their hopes up when they read parts with her. XD; (I adore the two in a threesome with Yuuki, and have various other fics with that idea, but CoB is centered on Zero & Kaname, pairing-wise.)_

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Kaname stirred and blinked tiredly, having difficulty to open his eyes, as if the lids were as sluggish, heavy and uncooperative as the rest of his body felt.

His body clock told him that several hours had passed, and that the next day's morning was well underway, but his body barely felt rested at all. It felt laden with lead and oddly irresponsive, as if he was even more drugged than he already was.

He felt less miserable than the previous day at least. His head had also cleared up considerably, but it was still spinning slightly and his limbs felt numb. Not to mention that he felt terribly lethargic, and when he tried to stretch a little, his body protested vehemently, in the form of a violent cramp that had him clenching his teeth and burying his face against the mattress. He bit his lower lip softly and squeezed his eyes shut tighter, fighting the return of the nausea and wondering what in the world was causing _that_ reaction. _Maybe the drugs from the previous day weren't the same as usual?  
_He'd had all sorts of odd collateral effects over the years, so he was never quite sure what was causing any particular symptom. This one felt a little bit the way he'd felt when they'd given him 'bad blood', from cheap seedy places that injected their slaves with illegal drug mixes to cut on the costs of using the government sanctioned stuff. It resulted in something as nastily powerful as the official anti-vampire drugs, but way less stable and causing violent bouts of sickness.  
But if it was that, he'd have been sick earlier… It only started acting up more while Kiryuu-sama and him were eating, so it was difficult to pin-point what was wrong. Or better saying, it was easy to think of possibilities the pureblood wanted to ignore at the moment.

At least, he should still have a little more time of peace if he was lucky. There were a good few hours ahead before much of the activity would start again in the 'house', and several more before opening time.  
The handlers from the day shift would already be around, which meant there was always the danger of them dropping by for a 'surprise visit' before the opening hours, but he hoped they'd be busy taking out for 'repairs' whoever might need it, and just leave him alone. Aside from guessing based on the scent of the others' blood in the air during the night, the vampires didn't really have any way to guess if it was a busy day or not, so one could never be sure whether the handlers would be overworked preparing for opening time and leave the slaves alone, or whether the men would be idle and tempted to look for some 'fun'.

He might feel like crap but he was pretty sure it wasn't bad enough for them to count him as being in need of any extra check-ups –not that him not needing them would stop them—, and he really didn't want to have to face any handlers right now. It was always horrible when they came by anyway, but when he felt particularly sick it was always harder. He knew pain very well, and he always found it much easier to deal with simple pain from a beating, than with the unsettling waves of dizziness and nausea from sickness, additional handicaps making him even more unbalanced. He sighed, wetting his parched lips and squeezing his eyes shut again, bringing his shaking hands up to feel the temperature of his own face, wondering if he was maybe feeling that way because he was feverish. His face felt cool, and in fact he felt significantly better now than the previous night, but he wondered what might be causing the odd symptoms, considering he should be better by now, if it was just left-over from all he'd gone through during the previous day.

Only when he was rubbing his eyes with his still somewhat-irresponsive fingers, did he suddenly notice something.

_What....?!_ Making the effort to actually open his eyes finally, the pureblood stared with surprise at his arms, finding that unexpectedly, he was wearing Zero's jacket. He'd been so lethargic that he'd failed to realize until he brought his hands to his face and noticed that he didn't feel the contact of his bare arms, but of the sleeves. The coverlet was still partially covering his legs and waist, and he'd failed to notice it wasn't that that was covering the upper half of his body.

His brain wasn't exactly at its best just after waking up, and for a split second, Kaname just stared in incomprehension, wondering how the hunter left without noticing he'd left his jacket, and whether he might get in trouble for having the man's forgotten item. It was precisely as he was pondering the question, that Zero leaned over, entering his field of vision with a radiant smile on his face, reaching out to smooth down some of the pureblood's unruly brown curls, which had grown even _more_ unruly after sleeping.

"Hey, sleepyhead. You gave me quite a scare last night."

The voice was gentle and playful, but that didn't seem to register in the senses of the suddenly horrified vampire.

The color left Kaname's face swiftly, and Zero was unsurprised but saddened all the same to see the inevitable dread in the wide open dark eyes beneath him. The pureblood looked pale like a ghost, and his arms came to rest on each side of his body very slowly, as if he was afraid that the slightest movement might break the still moment and start something terrible. Ironic really, that Kaname was the born predator, like nature's most perfect killing machine, and yet he was the one moving slowly as if by fear his slightest gesture would get Zero to attack him. Of course, in his current state the pureblood was closer to a wounded kitten than to a lion, so he couldn't be farther from the top of the food chain.

The brunet's hands were shaking ever so slightly, something he was trying to conceal, and that matched the little shivers that rolled down his whole body in waves.

"Ki… ryuu-sama…"

He practically croaked the name out in a strained voice, not sure why, as if acknowledging his presence by fear he might be a nightmare there to eat him or something. He promptly felt stupid and ashamed the moment his voice broke the still silence in the room.

_What was the man still doing there so late in the morning?!_ More importantly, what would he be planning to do to him now? Kaname hadn't expected to see the other so soon after his remarkable failure when he tried to seduce him the previous night, and he was dreadfully afraid that he'd angered him by passing out in the middle of it all. _Worse._ He remembered now that he'd freaked out and tried to struggle out of the man's arms. _No one_ ever thrashed around or tried to push a customer away. It just didn't happen. Or more exactly, it _almost_ never did happen. The times any slave forgot that rule, punishment was swift and terribly memorable, dished out by the customers themselves or by handlers—the reason why normally no one forgot… Kaname inevitably trembled, pressing his fingers onto the bedspread to stop his hands from shaking, and fearing this might be why the other was still there.  
Customers always left by night, or at worst late after dawn, but this was hours later. People rarely ever stuck around this late.

_Ichiou always stays until late…_ Kaname's body shook harder, a wave of nausea hitting him at the thought.

_And Ichiou was always the only one he tried to fight regardless of the rules, and the one who exacted the most 'memorable' punishments._

He only hoped he wouldn't be reminded of the old bastard while Kiryuu-sama punished him, if that was why the man was there. _Better bite the bullet now instead of waiting much longer and thinking of more horrible things… _

"Kiryuu-sama, last night, I… I…"

He tried to find words to say how sorry he was, but he wasn't even sure of what had happened after he'd apparently passed out. For all he knew, maybe the hunter _had_ continued and claimed his body while he was unconscious. He nearly stuttered, hating how out of control he seemed under the influence of the sudden panic allied to his still-spinning head, unsure even whether the same 'game rules' still applied after that failure, or whether the silver-haired man would drop the act and treat him now the way all hunters treated the slaves. He half-expected Zero to back-hand him for speaking without permission, any time now.

Instead, Zero laid a gentle finger over the pureblood's quivering lips, quieting his mortified attempts at explaining himself.

"Shh… it's okay, Kaname. You didn't do anything wrong."

"N-no…?" _That was hard to believe._

"Nope… And I understand that with the experience you've had of people, it might be hard to believe me when I say this, but… I swear I'm not going to hurt you." The hunter left his hands where the brunet could see them, and was trying to speak in a calm tone, slowly and hopefully in a non-threatening manner, as one may do when trying to approach a small animal that's been abused and is afraid of people.

Zero had spent the entire night there, part of it watching Kaname, first in his unmoving and corpse-like state –to the point that the hunter almost called for help a second time after seeing him that way for a few hours— and then seeing him toss in his sleep, once the collateral unconsciousness had faded into a fitful sleep. The hunter had read the chess book from start to end once and then had started it over again, to occupy himself and stay awake.  
He didn't dare sleeping, not exactly because Kaname could pose any threat in his state, but more because he couldn't stop worrying for the pureblood, and wanted to check on him regularly, if anything to make sure he was still alive and didn't need CPR or anything. At one point, he hadn't been sure whether Kaname was breathing, but luckily he'd been wrong. He still feared that the collateral effects of the wine mixed with the anti-vampire drugs might worsen, so he kept checking the vampire's vitals until the moment of the night when Kaname's sleep gradually grew more 'normal' and less corpse-like, if one could consider his agitated and restless state to be normal. It seemed that the beleaguered brunet didn't have respite from his nightmares even when asleep. Not that he seemed much better now that he was awake, truth to be said.

Zero slid an arm around Kaname's shoulders and pulled him closer, unsure whether holding him right now was a stupid idea or not, but having trouble resisting the urge when he didn't really know any other way to reassure someone and make them feel safer.

The pureblood tensed into the embrace immediately, so instinctively afraid that initially the hunter's words hadn't registered in his dizzy mind.

When they did, however, Kaname found himself puzzled enough that he didn't know how to react. Zero held him in his arms, the strong but gentle embrace conveying a warmth the pureblood never expected to feel again. He'd been so convinced that he'd destroyed it all the previous night, that he didn't know how to take the immense relief flooding him to know it wasn't all lost yet. He covered his lips with a trembling hand, not trusting himself not to let out a delighted sigh of relief, and a bit wary of making any noise.  
He was still terribly afraid, and even now he couldn't repress the little shivers shaking his body slightly, but they weren't only shivers of fear… _It felt so good to be in this man's arms. How was such a simple thing so impossible to obtain and yet so wonderful?_

Squelching the dangerous urge he felt to ask the hunter if he was serious when he said he wouldn't hurt him –it seemed so unlikely— Kaname allowed himself the momentary delight to melt into the man's embrace, reveling in the feeling of the other's pure warmth seeping through the clothes and feeding his starved heart. Zero's hand slid up the pureblood's shoulder and his fingers begun tracing soothing little patterns on the back of Kaname's head. The caress was tantalizing, making the pureblood shudder softly and unconsciously press himself into the contact.

Kaname curled up against Zero further, pulling his knees up slightly so his legs wouldn't be in the way as much, although in truth he was mostly doing it to try and assume a more modest position where his bare legs would be less obvious despite the coverlet having slipped off when the hunter pulled him into his arms.  
He felt strangely good just laying in the man's arms, but he was still a bit afraid that the sight of his partial nudity might attract problems by awakening the hunter's appetites. _Like hiding yourself could possibly prevent that._  
Kaname knew nothing could save him if Zero decided to do something, but concealing his nudity a little made him feel slightly less exposed and vulnerable.

The proximity gave the pureblood goose bumps as he shivered softly in the other's arms, but there was something that wouldn't leave his mind. He didn't feel the usual intense soreness he'd feel after someone violated him, but that didn't necessarily mean it hadn't happened. Especially since his body was '_used'_ so constantly that there was always some residual pain, so he couldn't quite tell for sure, with the dizziness and all making it harder to gauge properly those things.  
_There were better ways to make sure. _As discreetly as possible, and from an angle that was out of Zero's direct line of sight, Kaname slid a hand behind himself, and quickly checked the _something_ he'd been inevitably wondering about... Wary fingers slid down the cleft of his cheeks, probing further down for any residual stickiness that would indicate the hunter had taken him while he was unconscious.

_Nothing…?_

It was unexpected enough that the pureblood hesitated, doubting his own perceptions, and lingered an instant longer, fingers searching, almost disbelieving as they confirmed again that the area over his opening was perfectly dry, against all that he was used to. Normally, by this time of the morning, he'd be desperately trying to ignore the throbbing pain there that inevitably followed being forcefully stretched and regularly torn open over the course of a whole night and countless demanding 'visitors'. Finding himself untouched and unharmed was something so unexpected that the pureblood wasn't quite sure what to think of it.  
He pulled his hand back discreetly, still terribly afraid that the hunter might notice what he was doing and get any ideas. But even after double-checking, the area was surprisingly free of any …_signs of use_, so to speak. Kaname was extremely surprised.

Although he was also quick to remind himself that it didn't necessarily mean anything since Zero could have cleaned him while he was unconscious. He _had_ put the jacket on him just as easily, after all.  
But it was unlikely the hunter would have bothered going through that trouble if he had such intentions for the pureblood. Zero was the one in power, he could do anything he wanted to Kaname with no need to conceal anything or care for what the pureblood thought of it.  
But despite the possibility that the hunter might have hidden the evidence to lure Kaname into a false sense of safety, something told the brunet that no such thing had happened, and that Zero really didn't take advantage of him while he was unconscious.

Call it stupid hopes once more, call it a lesson not properly learned, but the pureblood still _believed_, somehow. At least a tiny little bit.

He was wary and worried, but when Zero looked at him with such sincere and gentle eyes, Kaname didn't know what to think. Impossible as the hunter's words may be, the brunet found himself wanting to believe what he said, even if it was just for a moment, even if that hope were to eventually shatter him to pieces all over again.  
He told himself he would just have to try and only believe it only _momentarily_, if he couldn't avoid believing it. He'd fight the destructive urge to have hopes that lasted longer than a single visit from the man.  
He didn't believe he had any chances of being okay on the long run anyway, but he wanted to believe Zero wouldn't do things in such a manner, when he finally ended it all. The pureblood would like to think that, horrible as it would inevitably be when the time finally came and the hunter decided to break him, Zero would still do it in a somewhat open and sincere manner. Although Kaname wasn't sure if maybe it wouldn't be better to have it happen while he was unconscious.

One of the hunter's arms left the embrace, and Kaname looked up, wondering why. To his surprise, he saw Zero unwrapping a makeshift bandage he had around his wrist, to reveal the cut from the previous night.

It wasn't healed yet, naturally. Hunters healed faster than humans but nowhere _near_ as fast as vampires would. But it had dried enough to be crusty with old blood and only produce a few drops pearling to the surface of the wound when Zero flexed his wrist, so the hunter once more pulled out his little pocket knife and cut a new line about an inch away from the first one, a stoic determination on his face not letting the pain show through. His gaze contrasted visibly with the firmly set jaw— Zero's eyes were soft with concern for the still shivering vampire.

When he brought his bleeding wrist up to the brunet's lips, Kaname didn't even have the strength to resist anymore. He pressed his lips to the wound with rapturous delight and squeezed his tired eyes –now burning red from bloodlust once more— shut tightly to hold in the tears that were already threatening to form again.

Yesterday, he'd tried to resist the man's delicious blood. _Devastatingly wonderful blood_, blissfully sweet and more soothing than anything Kaname had tasted in his entire life.

Today, he didn't have the energy to even try.

He was aware of how weak that meant he'd become, far beyond the physical weaknesses that could be blamed on the drugs and others. Until not too long ago, he'd have been disgusted of himself for opening up so much to someone, not to mention horrified by the implications –how close to him the hunter had gotten, how much power the man now held over him, how more painfully destroyed he'd inevitably be when this whole game ended…

But it was too much, everything hurt just _too much_. He was far too tired. He couldn't bring himself to fight anymore, even if fighting meant only trying to keep his heart closed so that man wouldn't take over it completely.

_There was no more fighting to be done. He'd lost, and Kiryuu-sama had won._

If the man were to leave now, Kaname knew his heart would break. However much he may know it was just an illusion, he desperately needed the warmth of his embrace, those soft gazes, the soothing words whispered as he swallowed each draught of the irresistibly intoxicating lifeblood…

He'd been wary to drink the man's blood because he'd realized it made him feel even closer to him. But it didn't matter anymore, because his _'Kiryuu-sama'_'s victory over him was so complete that a little more didn't even matter anymore. It was too late to even try and cut himself from the man.

_I will be even more your thrall if we continue this. But I almost want to. I just wish you wouldn't throw me away like garbage once you're done.  
Unfortunately, we both know this would be too beautiful of a dream, too impossible and undeserved._

Tears slid past the pureblood's closed eyelids, wetting his dark lashes before rolling down his delicate face, pale but for the pink flush taking over his cheeks in a most attractive and endearing manner. Zero kissed the tears away, but that only made Kaname cry harder.

_If your kisses were real, I'd die for you a thousand times over, Kiryuu-sama…_

Zero was still whispering gentle encouragements, holding his wrist in place for the brunet to drink, with a calmness that was that of one naturally inclined to be a care giver— something that was most unexpected in a hunter; but then, a hunter protecting a vampire was a far more incongruous and bizarre sight.

Cradled by the hunter's arm and lulled by the soft sounds of the blood flowing –so calming and pleasant to a vampire's ears – Kaname could only marvel at what wonders made it so difficult to read the man.

Because in Kiryuu-sama's blood, all he could read was care and gentleness. If Kaname hadn't suffered so much in his life that he couldn't possibly believe in such a thing, he would have read genuine concern and sincerity in it as well, but as his senses were far too dulled and weakened by drugs, and as he was himself much too exhausted from the recent events, on top of being naturally prone to distrust his own judgment over such things, Kaname assumed he was merely mistaken.

When your weakened senses tell you something that your reason knows _can't_ possibly be true, you don't go against logic, you assume your failing senses are indeed wrong.

And so, Kaname wasn't able to perceive the one thing that might have fully reassured him –the utter sincerity in Zero's blood.

There was no possible deception in the blood. But the pureblood wasn't sure about that, and imagined it might be possible to only feel _part_ of someone's feelings, noticing what was more strongly at the forefront at that moment, and missing the rest of it, the iceberg hidden under the surface of the water.

If Kaname had grown up among purebloods, instead of being torn from his family so early, he might have known so much more about all that. But too drugged to be able to read the hunter well, and assuming that Zero might be able to somehow deceive him even through his blood, the pureblood could only go on being mistaken, his heart far too scarred over the years to be able to trust now, even –or perhaps _especially_— to trust the man the brunet knew had more power over him than anyone else there.

_Ichiou could break his body and his soul, but only Kiryuu-sama could tear apart his heart, if –or better saying, when— he finally chose to._

Zero watched the vampire drinking slowly, the soft lips pressed to his skin with unmistakable desperation and need, shifting every so often to chase a stray drop with a movement of that delicate pink tongue, not wanting to lose even a tiny bit of that blood. Heavy lidded eyes gleaming brightly red, strangely sultry with those long lashes clinging together in clumps wet with tears. Kaname was so beautiful that it almost hurt to look at him. Even hurt, even feeling miserable, the pureblood was stunning.

Those lips as soft as rose petals moved gingerly against the hunter's wrist, and Zero felt it was so weird… Not the sensation itself, but the fact that he _should_ have felt weird giving a vampire his blood, and instead he found it strangely peaceful and fulfilling. To know that the beautiful living creature he held cradled close to him was feeling better, that his wounds were slowly healing a little more, directly thanks to his blood…  
It should have been so wrong, it should have been disgusting, unforgivable, taboo… And yet, it was so unforgivably, sinfully _beautiful_. He must have gone insane to think that way. Dryly, the hunter told himself his parents would be rolling in their tombs if they knew, but… If the _rights_ and _wrongs_ of hunters were inacceptable, then he would just have to make up his own set of rules all by himself. It was what own values commanded him to do, and he knew his parents would have approved.

Or at least, he hoped they would, if not of the more immediate applications of the idea, then at least of the principle itself.

Well, not the blood giving part, that's for sure. They had hated vampires like pretty much any other hunter. But they had always otherwise respected life, and Zero would like to believe that if they had been able to meet Kaname and look past the automatic cultural baggage of hatred between their races, they'd find it impossible to resist comforting the broken brunet too.  
If the other hunters might find that the most disgusting crime –and there's no doubt they would— then it just meant he had to make sure no one ever found out.

He'd long tried analyzing his urge, he'd tried rationalizing or even denying it, he'd even gone from puzzlement into anger in a moment of weakness and uncertainty, turning that feeling against the vampire momentarily, but the urge to go on seeing Kaname had survived everything, and continued just as strong. Whatever may come out of that forbidden fascination, the one thing Zero was sure of was that he couldn't bring himself to just abandon Kaname.  
Telling himself that it wasn't his business or that it wasn't his fault if the pureblood's life was what it was didn't work either, he still felt compelled to protect him. And even just trying to rationalize it all simply made him feel more and more guilty. Guilty for the world of hunters, of which he was a piece, and that had enslaved so many. And more recently, guilty about his broken promise, as if his reasoning was an attempt of making up excuses for that tragic night.

There just wasn't a way out of it: he actually felt more and more _responsible_ for that vampire, even though there was no reason for it other than the strange possessiveness he felt around Kaname.

To his surprise, as he thought more about it –and the long, sleepless night of worrying about the vampire had given him quite a bit of time to mull over the question – he realized that he hated more and more even the mere idea that others would go on touching the fragile brunet. Zero may not have a detailed description of the unspeakable horror that happened to him each night, but the telltale bruises and other wounds the vampire's skin was always covered with told a very precise story all by themselves of the regular brutality and abuse he was made to withstand. Zero was surprised by the intensity of his feelings on the subject.

Kaname drank a little more than the small amount he'd had the previous night, before sighing softly and resigning himself to stop, still wary of the hunter possibly getting angry if he didn't guess well when to stop. His initial instinctive reaction was to lick the wound clean expecting it to close, but it naturally didn't, human healing not being anywhere near the speed of the vampiric one. His cheeks turned a darker shade of an endearing pink once he caught himself, realizing it was a gesture he hadn't had the occasion to use in so many years, an innocent reminder of a long gone time. He stared at the two cuts –the fresh one and the scabby one from the previous day— a wave of confused guilt washing over him while Zero rewrapped his wrist with the same cloth.

Kaname was still unsure of why the hunter hadn't taken advantage of him while he was unconscious the previous night, but he suspected that this respite wouldn't last much longer, and assumed at the very least that he would be instructed to repay the other for his blood soon enough.  
Not that the hunter even had to have given it to him anyway –considering their positions, all that Zero had to do if he wanted Kaname's body, was to order and the vampire would be forced to give himself to him, whether he wanted or not. And if he'd been any other customer, it would have been just any other night, just another meaningless moment of horror.

It was because he _wasn't,_ that Kaname dreaded the possibility so much. _Anyone else would be just any other faceless rape. But you, of all people… you raping me would destroy all that's left in my heart._

The first time they'd met, Zero had given him blood too, against all expectancies of both sides, on a spur-of-the-moment urge fueled by kindness and pity perhaps, and Kaname had felt compelled to repay him in pleasure, out of his own choice. Later too, he'd tried to offer the same 'services' to the hunter, out of gratitude for his kindness and gifts.  
Since then, things had changed enough that by now, the pureblood was so ensnared by his silver-haired protector that he was getting terribly tempted to do the same thing again, not merely out of gratitude –that too of course—, but also in hopes of pleasing and distracting Zero, in hopes he might not take him today.

Countless customers of that wretched place could all get him to submit out of cruelty, but Zero was the one who had him on his knees with nothing but kindness. The pureblood was so afraid of that kindness running out if he did something wrong, that he'd have offered almost anything –short of what he feared the most—, to have it last even just a little longer.

Kaname didn't know if it was either because Zero saw the desperate idea in his eyes as it formed in his mind, or because for some reason or another the silver-haired man truly hadn't intended to take him just yet, but Zero stopped him before the pureblood could speak, and just lowered him onto the bed, smiling gently, his gestures careful as if he was holding something precious that might shatter if handled roughly.

"Do you need to rest a little? I know you just woke up, but you went through a lot lately. I'm not going away until I can be sure that you'll be more or less okay, so go ahead and sleep some more if you need to."

For a moment, Kaname just stared on, as if his mind was too slow to process the other's words, and then it clicked into place and he realized why the hunter was still there despite the fact it was well into the morning of the next day. _He's waiting until I've gotten better?!_

The idea seemed so impossible that the pureblood was stunned for a good moment, almost tempted to ask if the hunter didn't have to… go do whatever it is that hunters did during the day. _Like_ _kill or capture vampires? Not a safe subject, most likely. _

A part of Kaname's mind, too used to making such connections, inevitably came up with the realization that if Zero had indeed organized the beating the other night as a lesson for him, then it was only normal that the hunter would have known in advance when to take a day off to 'comfort' his victim, which would explain why he was here... Kaname suppressed a shudder at the thought, almost angry at himself for even considering it when Zero was looking at him with such soft eyes.

As the hunter's gentle hand came to caress the brunet's hair, that thought faded away as fast as it had formed, and Kaname practically had to force himself to not automatically press himself into the caress, his body begging for the soothing contact and refusing to focus on anything else. It was just too much at once though, and it was getting more and more difficult to hold in the emotion rolling in waves through his body.

Zero meant his touch to be reassuring and gentle, and so he was particularly surprised when he realized Kaname was trembling.

"Kaname…?"

"Ki… Kiryuu-sama. I… I am…"

_I don't know what you are planning to do to me nor when you intend to do it, but… I'm yours.  
I can't fight you, physically or emotionally. Anything you want to do to me… I'm too far gone to be able to even hope resisting your wishes. Break me or fix me, I'm yours to do as you please… _

He meant to get up, he really did. He meant to kneel at the man's feet and proclaim his complete and utter defeat. To hell with all his pureblood instincts clamoring how stupid the mere idea of it was, and how he should cling to what caution could still be used now. _It didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. He was lost and at the mercy of this hunter, body and soul._

But the words wouldn't come, and his body just miserably trembled and refused to cooperate, much to his dismay. When he tried to force himself to get up anyway, his head started spinning again and he had to lay back down quickly, under the worried gaze of the hunter, who'd apparently recognized the previous night's symptoms, milder as they may be now.

"I didn't know the wine would cause a reaction with the anti-vampire drugs. I wouldn't have given it to you if I'd known."

The pureblood's eyes widened a little in understanding, eliciting a sad smile back from the hunter.

_Ah, so that's what happened…?_

The apologetic look in Zero's eyes was sincere, and so was the usual warmth in his hand as it resumed stroking the brunet's silky hair.

It was really difficult to resist all the urges the pureblood awakened in him. Right now, they were of a more innocent nature than some of the _other_ urges Zero usually got in Kaname's presence. The hunter was still ashamed for not having seen through the pureblood's desperate act of seduction the previous night. He could only hope he hadn't scared him too much before Kaname shut down.

The urges Zero was currently getting were merely of the comforting and caring nature, at least. He was still too worried after the previous night, do for the time being not even the sight of the pureblood's partially naked beauty overcame that worry.

Zero leaned over Kaname, trying not to chuckle at the endearing—albeit saddening as well— way the pureblood instinctively shrunk back against the mattress in automatic response to the increased proximity. The hunter's lips touched the brunet's forehead gently, before whispering, "Rest, Kaname. I already called in sick earlier today anyway, so they won't be expecting me. I'll be here when you wake up."

The unspoken promise in the hunter's gaze was one that spoke directly to the pureblood's very soul. 'I won't leave you alone when you're like this.'

The lump of pure, raw emotion Kaname felt growing in his throat made it harder for him to speak than the dizziness from the drugs ever could.

_I've been so horribly alone for ten years… please… please be true… please don't leave me alone right now… if I wake to find you're not here… I might…_

All were words he couldn't say aloud, of course. So instead, the pureblood took the risk of grasping the very tip of the hunter's sleeve, with tentative fingers, his gaze full of questions and uncertainty.  
When Zero let him do it and, instead of disapproving, merely pressed his lips onto the brunet's forehead again, Kaname let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes, a single tear rolling down his cheek as he surrendered himself to sleep again, fingers still tightly holding onto the other's sleeve as if it was some sort of lifeline or a safety so that he'd know he wasn't alone.

'_I'm yours…'_ The pureblood's lips mouthed the words in silence, trying to confess at least that one truth while he still could, but his consciousness was already fading into sleep and no sound came out.

Zero arranged himself to sit back in a somewhat not-too-uncomfortable position while not removing his sleeve from the pureblood's apparently desperate grip, and resigned himself to go back to re-reading the chess book.

--

Zero had ended up staying next to Kaname all day long. His colleagues, whom the young hunter had called to declare he wasn't feeling well and would be skipping work that day, were persuaded Zero was with a mistress somewhere –a direct conclusion based on the sight of his picnic basket of treats the previous time they saw him— but covered up for him, as conniving and solidaristic as young men tend to be when one of them is skipping work for such a 'noble cause' as what they assumed must be a fine piece of tail. No doubt they would be pestering Zero for the details later.

Zero had only returned home later that evening, once he'd assured himself that Kaname had recouped fully from the dizziness and faintness caused by the accidental mix of alcohol and drugs. He'd waited until the pureblood was awake again, had eaten a little of the leftover snacks from the previous day, and looked better, before leaving.

Zero hadn't really closed an eye ever since the night two days before, and even then, it wasn't much that he'd slept while rotting with guilt for breaking the promise he'd made to Kaname. He was deadly exhausted, especially having given the brunet a non-negligible amount of blood.

He desperately needed to sleep, but he couldn't exactly have plopped down on the bed at the 'house' and just went to sleep there. It's not that he truly believed Kaname would try to do something, but… it was just wrong.  
He may have all those growing ideals against slavery, but he was still a hunter. He was well aware that Kaname was, ultimately a predator, and going to sleep next to him, regardless of how weakened said predator may be, was a foolish idea at best and asking for trouble for them both at worst.  
It's not because it had accidentally happened before that he should make a habit of it. It had been dangerous enough before, and they'd been lucky nothing happened. He shouldn't tempt fate. Especially since, even though he trusted really well in his own reflexes, and knew well that the pureblood stood no chance against him in his weakened state, if Kaname did do something stupid, there were pretty big chances he would be summarily executed. No slave harmed a hunter and lived. It didn't matter who they belonged to, nor whether there was a reason or not –in fact, in doubt the slave was to be put to death just in case, as an example. So Zero didn't want to take the risk to sleep there, both out of instinctive apprehension and because the big risk was by far more to Kaname than to himself.

So he returned home to sleep, much as he absolutely loathed the idea of leaving Kaname knowing that the pureblood would have to face an entire night of avid customers that were probably already lining up for him outside.

A simple note from Ichiru was waiting for Zero when he got home.

_["You never came home yesterday?! I'm out for band rehearsals, see you sometime."]_

It seemed that he was perpetually condemned to feel guilty for one reason or another. If he spent time with Kaname, Ichiru complained, and if he did the opposite, the pureblood suffered horrors. He sighed, putting away the note and hoping he hadn't needlessly worried Ichiru, although a certain hunch told him it might not have been the case. That worrisome little hunch that always made him wonder, when Ichiru didn't look worried or concerned about things much.

Pinned to the fridge with a magnet, there was yet another note, this one from Yagari.

_["Why are neither of you ever home? I put beer in the fridge."]_

Ah, additional guilt. Well, maybe he could do something about a part of it at least, the hunter decided while wondering what time Ichiru would get home.

He could always see his master at the headquarters, but he had to figure out when and where he could spend more time with his brother without having to abandon Kaname to his own luck too often.

--

The sound of the curtains sliding open hit him right on same time that the sunlight flooded the room and his brother exclaimed, "Come on, Ichiru, it's a gorgeous morning!! How about we have breakfast together and go out for a run? You used to love that when we were kids, I think we should bring back some of those good old habits."

Instead of the welcome he was hoping for –without very high expectations, truth to be said—, Zero only got for reply a guttural groan of protest as Ichiru practically shrunk under the blankets trying to escape the offending light.

Unfazed, his twin opened the windows as well, to let the morning breeze in along with the tempting scent of fresh bread being baked at the bakery on the corner of the street. The chirping of the sparrows on the rooftops and the noise of people and cars in the street a few floors below completed the morning scenery, and Zero breathed in deeply, feeling healthier just from the sight of the sun rising over the sleepy roofs of the city. Streams of steam rose peacefully from random chimneys here and there, and swallows crossed the sky in apparently erratic flights, in search for their morning meal.

Ichiru shrunk further under the covers and his protests grew louder, as if he needed to cover up the additional street noises to better emphasize for his twin how unwanted that morning invasion was.

Not put off by the rejection in the least –he was well used to his twin's habits— Zero risked a joke, trying to keep the tone light.

"I swear Ichiru, if I didn't know better I'd think you have vampire blood in you! You hate the mornings so much these days…"

The younger man bolted up to a sitting position on the bed, a look of horror on his face before he shook off the sleep and saw the innocent expression on his twin's face.

_Phew… I should have known better than thinking Zero was suspicious. As clueless as ever…_

"I was just joking, Ichiru, no need to look so offended."

The official story was that Ichiru hated vampires. He paraded that opinion vehemently, so that people wouldn't put their noses in his business and risk getting close to Shizuka. He was so effective at it that not even his twin suspected that in truth, he couldn't care less for politics, aside from the immediate consequences they may have for the one and only pureblood he cared for.

Although by now, Ichiru was so powerful from Shizuka's blood that he could probably have easily rid himself of any curious meddlers without them standing a chance to strike first, but it was best to not take any risks, especially when it came to his precious secret.

"If I may ask, dearest brother, why are you torturing me so early in the morning??" Sarcasm dripped from Ichiru's voice, as he'd just shoot a glance at the alarm clock and realized just _how_ early it was. _Obscenely early_, in his opinion.

Zero's answer was sincere, as always. He scratched the back of his head as he replied, trying to give himself some countenance that could stand up to Ichiru's sarcasm. "I just thought it was a pity that lately we don't get to spend as much time together… I hadn't realized it was that bad until you told me you'd been missing me, the other night, and I really feel guilty for it. I can't always be around by night as often, and neither can you, so I figured we might as well try to catch up with each other in the mornings. It seems to be more convenient for us both... We could jog together or something, like in the old times."

Zero's attempt at optimism was starting to erode at the face of his twin's uncooperative looks. Ichiru groaned again, making a face as if his brother had just asked him to go climb the Everest together for fun.

_Ah, the 'good ole times'. What was again the reason why I almost left him at home when Shizuka-sama attacked…? Probably that, among other things._

Of course, Zero didn't know about that detail in particular, neither was he supposed to know Ichiru was far less cheerful and 'family activities oriented' than others might believe. So the younger twin quickly composed himself to appear less confrontational, and made a dejected little grimace to comically emphasize his dislike of the early morning hours, in a way that would be endearing rather than sarcastic.

"Zero, do you have _any_ idea what time I went to bed? I had rehearsals with the band last night until less than three or four hours ago. I'd love to go out with you, but I'm dead right now." _Add an additional pinch of guilt to the mix now._ "And you know that much as I loved running with you as a kid, there's no way I could keep up with your rhythm now. …Not without wrecking my health, probably…"

_Ah, the decisive words to be sure to put an end to any talk with Zero… _

Except that for a second, Zero just looked at him a bit surprised, and Ichiru almost faltered, wondering if perhaps his twins wasn't quite as clueless as he seemed.

Ichiru swiftly and effectively broke the strange mood by running a tired hand over his face in a way that made it unclear whether he was trying to fight the residual sleepiness or whether he was feeling hotter than usual.

Zero face was quick to flush red with guilt, and he rushed to the side of the bed, putting one hand on his twin's forehead and another on his own to check his temperature, before breathing in relief at finding out that Ichiru was not in fact, feverish.

The younger twin concealed a smile of victory. _Success. No one knows how to handle Zero like I do._

Ichiru was so prone to getting a fever as a child, that it was an ingrained instinct in Zero to always be careful in case it happened. He'd hoped that his brother might feel like running together now that so many years had passed and he seemed much better, but Zero still remembered well all the times Ichiru had gotten sick while trying to keep up with his training when they were children, and wouldn't take that risk if he felt it might happen nowadays too.

The older twin had resigned himself to have breakfast alone as usual, and Ichiru cheerfully wished him a great day, before burying himself back under the blankets in his bed to go back to sleep. The door closed softly behind Zero's retreating figure, and Ichiru sighed to himself in the dark, frowning now that Zero couldn't see him anymore.

_That was a bit too close for comfort. Maybe I should be more careful._

In a way, it wasn't quite a surprise that Zero might wonder things. Ever since they were kids, the older twin knew that Ichiru was far from being all innocent as others might believe. He'd known all along, even when Ichiru clung to him and appeared completely dependent and utterly attached to his 'beloved older brother'.  
And in turn, Ichiru knew just as well, without either of them having to exchange a word on the subject, that Zero knew how he felt.

All along, they'd played that strange dance of behaving utterly close and utterly loving, even though they both silently acknowledged the unspoken fact Ichiru felt the sadistic need to inflict cruelty on Zero from time to time. A need that was independent of the very real feelings of love between them, and that Zero understood, and worse, accepted fully, allowing Ichiru to go on with it.

The way Zero saw it, he had no right to refuse submitting to Ichiru's punitive urges.

However, what Zero didn't know was exactly how far it all went. He knew he owed Ichiru far more than he could repay in a lifetime, for having taken his strength before their birth, but he didn't know the heights that Ichiru's desire of revenge had pushed him to. Perhaps because that revenge had befallen their parents and not Zero, or perhaps because it went so much farther than Zero could have imagined in his assumptions about Ichiru's intrinsic good nature.

But while it was a good thing that Zero had escaped the worst extremes of his brother's anger so far, it also meant that Ichiru's anger towards his twin was never fully appeased, not the way it might have been if he'd gotten to at least exact a part of this revenge on Zero.

Instead, that covered up feeling went on festering, seething within the younger twin, his heart ever wavering from one side to the other over the edge of that delicate balance between love and hate.

Ichiru did love his twin. But sometimes, he also hated him.

The dual feelings made that he couldn't afford yet to have Zero know fully of the hatred part, much less of what he'd indirectly participated in doing to their parents.

If Zero knew, Ichiru would lose him. And he wasn't ready yet for that. Maybe later one day, if the hatred finally won over the love, then perhaps he could let that happen without minding much, or perhaps he might even do to his brother what he'd been so terribly tempted to do that night four years ago, and have Shizuka-sama kill or turn him.

But for now, he wasn't sure of anything yet, and he preferred waiting to see.

While it might have been extremely tempting to have Zero turned if things were different, with the current laws that meant Zero would inevitably end up sold as a slave –the fate of all vampires regardless of them having been human or not—, and that would only complicate things more.

Furthermore, his love for Zero was real despite the hatred, and he didn't wish a fate of slavery and horror upon his brother. Not with the implications of rape and abuse inherent to it in the current society. If someone was turned, they were dead to the world, at the eyes of the hunters. It didn't matter _who_ they might have been before or how important they might have been, their life was over, they were slaves like any other vampire.

Not that any of those cases ever happened anymore. Only a few did before the end of the war, when there were still purebloods free and able to strike against their enemies by turning them. But the law was the law, a vampire was a vampire, regardless of any other considerations.

In the worst case, if he ever _did_ need to get rid of Zero suddenly, then maybe that would be a most effective manner –vampires couldn't even be taken as witnesses against the word of a human, so there was nothing more effective to get rid of someone for sure, really—, but not unless it was absolutely necessary.

Whatever may happen, there was someone who took priority first and foremost over anyone else, in Ichiru's heart.

_Shizuka-sama…_

Things were more convenient if Zero, the well-respected young hunter with the promising career ahead of himself, was the head of their household, creating stability for them and attracting the attention over himself and away from whatever Ichiru might be doing.  
For years, Ichiru had hated that everybody's attention was constantly focused on Zero, comparing the two of them. Nothing angered him more than that stupid human reaction of automatically comparing them just because they were twins. It was what made him feel most murderous.  
Now, ironically, he didn't mind as much not to have people constantly paying attention to him. It made his sneaking around back and forth between his secret apartment and the Kiryuu home so much more convenient and easy.

So Zero would live. Both because Ichiru still loved his brother, and because he was useful…

_Better not anger me or stop being useful, my dearest brother…_

It was a halfhearted menace though, that faded off into the background as Ichiru slipped back into sleep, lulled by the knowledge that Zero was just as easy to manipulate, and that nothing had changed.

--

Zero held onto his _'I was sick yesterday'_ story with sufficient gruffness and enough of the pointed glares he was so good at producing, that his closer colleagues didn't dare ask anything about a possible nocturnal escapade, a good number of them actually assuming that maybe his plans went down the drain due to being actually sick or something, and he wasn't in a mood to mess with.

However, the two days or paperwork stacked in a pile on his table were an unavoidable reality Zero had to catch up with. And he did, in an amazing time that once more attested to how much faster than the average hunter his age he was, but it was still pretty late when he got out of work.

He picked up his things and rushed past the empty desks, but leaving so late, he naturally only arrived at the 'house' way past the opening hours. He brought to work a bag with the chess set and the book so that he could take them directly with himself, but he would't have enough time to pick up anything particularly appetizing as a last minute little treat. He'd expected the bakeries to be closed by the time he'd be finally getting out of work though, and had planned ahead, picking up a bag of small puff pastries with chocolate filling that morning, during his jogging. They must be a little dry after a whole day sitting in the bakery's paper bag, but considering the type of food Kaname normally had, he would most likely forgive a little dryness easily enough.

Zero arrived right as the previous customer was walking down the stairs coming from the pureblood's room, and the check-in attendant, recognizing him as a regular, discreetly let him in ahead of the random people waiting as usual, so the young hunter didn't have to wait at all.

He found Kaname coming out of the bath and in his usual state, in other words, sporting a number of new bruises, a few scrapes here and there, and a look of absolute uncertainty and worry that didn't fade away even after the hunter handed him his jacket for him to wear while he was there.

It was a quiet evening, made of stolen glances and large periods of silence. Although if the chocolate pastries were dry, Kaname either didn't even notice or didn't mind in the least.

They were both hesitating on what to say.

Kaname had the time to replenish his strengths a little during the day, and concluded that his previous urge to tell the hunter just how far at his mercy he was, not only physically but also in his heart, might not be such a good idea after all, (painfully true as it may all be). He stayed silent about it for now, waiting instead to see what the hunter decided to do or say.  
Zero might have been the only customer to come to that place who hadn't claimed Kaname's body, but he'd been extremely successful at completely besieging the pureblood's aching heart.

Zero was tempted to ask the brunet if they could maybe forget about the recent events and move on as if nothing had happened, but he figured it might make him sound like a complete hypocrite, and the last thing he wanted was to have Kaname even more suspicious of his intentions than he already visibly was.

_No, the only way for them to move on and put this hurt in the past really was not to be found in words, but in actions. _

Let them communicate in a silent manner, since the words had only seemed to cause more trouble than anything, lately. With that decision taken, Zero pulled out the chess board, and smiled at Kaname with a look of playful challenge.

--

The following few days –or more exactly, nights— were a strange time, for both sides.

A time made of gentleness and unexpected closeness even if neither side knew exactly how to deal with it all, or how far it was okay to go in their choices of conversation topics or even in how physically close to each other they got.

Zero came to visit regularly, bringing the chess set and tasty little treats whenever he could.

Kaname remained shy and wary, but it was beyond obvious that the times the hunter visited were the times when he felt alive, and his reaction to the man's gifts and caresses were of more and more complete abandon, regardless of the remaining fear that was impossible to miss on his every gesture and expression. It was an odd contrast really, and it created quite a number of questions in Zero's mind. He could tell the vampire enjoyed his company, but there was something terribly sad and dark about it as well, as if Kaname could never relax, was always expecting something horrible to happen in the immediate moments, regardless of the hunter's precautions to not startle him.

Each time he left, Zero hesitated to tell Kaname he'd come the next night for sure, because there was no way to know ahead of time whether he would be free for sure or whether a last minute mission out of the city might spring up on him, requiring him to be away for a day or more.  
It may not have mattered as much in the past, but now… The last thing he wanted was a repeat of the promise incident.  
But on same time, he hated not being able to reassure the brunet about coming to visit again soon.

Not to mention it was difficult to let him know _why_ he might not be coming as well… If he didn't give any reason, or if he gave a casual-sounding one like 'I might not come if something comes up', he'd be passing on the message that Kaname wasn't important enough for him to bother visiting if some random other thing came up. And by now, Zero felt this wouldn't be acceptable. He didn't know the exact nature of the vampire's feelings about him—there were days were the young hunter felt exasperated at how often it seemed that it was just p0lain horrified dread – but he knew that his own feelings of being close to him made it feel like a betrayal if he implied that Kaname didn't matter enough for him to bother visiting.

But he'd also hesitated in flat-out telling Kaname the true reason: that if he didn't suddenly didn't show up on a night he'd claimed he'd be coming, it meant he was most likely in an urgent mission.

It wasn't exactly easy to mention that, because however you may look at it, it directly involved letting a vampire know the Hunter Association was having a surprise attack somewhere, that night.  
While it was certain that Kaname had no way to communicate that information to other vampires or profit from it in any way –even if he _could_ communicate it to others, it was doubtful something so vague could really be of much, if any, use—, it was still morally questionable for a hunter to do disclose such information to the enemy.

_But then, how would the other hunters consider him giving his blood to the vampire, or even treating him with so much gentleness?_ Were enemies supposed to bathe together and lay down in bed playing chess?

After a long moment of deliberation, Zero had finally told Kaname about the possible last minute missions. Things would be open, as much as possible. He wouldn't make reservations at the 'house' since he wasn't sure when he could and couldn't come, but he would try to come regularly, and he would always bring something.

Kaname genuinely didn't know why Zero even bothered with those gentle attentions that he absolutely had no need to rely on since he already had so much power over him anyway, but he was of course not about to object, especially when such little things were the highlight of his day and what kept him going through the darkest hours.

They both spent strange yet oddly peaceful evenings together, filled with endearingly awkward moments, in which both were constantly 'testing the waters', not quite sure how to behave around each other and trying to set down a standard to make things more comfortable.

Well, to be exact, the latter was on Zero's part. Kaname just followed the silver-haired hunter's lead earnestly and tried to conform as well as he could to whatever the man seemed to want to do at the moment, putting all the energy his tired body still had into trying to not disappoint the hunter, regardless of how often Zero explained that he wasn't testing him or anything, and just wanted to spend time together.

Zero hoped that on a long enough run, the vampire would fear him less, and the communication between them might become less complicated.

It was strange. The tentative awkward intimacy that had started to form between them for some time, —and that the whole incident with the broken promise had seemed to shatter— wasn't fully back, but Kaname was surprisingly docile. Not that he was anything other than polite normally, but it seemed like he was more readily pliant than before, in a more markedly resigned manner.  
Zero would have been happy if that meant the pureblood was opening up more to him, but he was afraid it wasn't quite that simple. Kaname still visibly expected him to do something horrible anytime, but now he seemed utterly resigned to it. Dreadfully wary and jumpy still, but displaying a resignation of inescapability that was absolutely not what the hunter had wanted to make him feel.

Zero found himself feeling that even the irritating resistance Kaname had shown him once, the only time they'd had something similar to a fight and the pureblood had refused to answer his questions, now suddenly seemed far more positive than the brunet's current passivity that made Zero think of a lamb awaiting the slaughter and having lost hope and accepted that it couldn't do anything about it.

Ironically, while another might have gotten angry at the pureblood's tendency to always expect the worse from him, Zero only redoubled of guilt – a feeling he was well used to since his birth— and attempted to reassure him even harder each time he suspected it was something he was either doing or failing to do that was making the pureblood so.

They had daily chess games now, or almost daily. For the past three days they'd spent the evenings alternating moments playing and ones reading, Zero bringing random reading material for himself, while Kaname struggled, apparently trying to memorize the entire chess book or something.

Kaname would maybe not have admitted that even under torture maybe –a last remnant of his shattered pureblood pride perhaps— but he actually had trouble reading the book, at least initially.

He'd been well ahead in his studies back during the war, especially for his age, but since then ten years of intellectual emptiness had passed. Vampires were considered beasts by their captors, and as such, they were supposed to be illiterate and forbidden access to anything they could read or use to write. It served also as a way to prevent them from passing each other notes and communicating in secret, on top of reinforcing the humiliation of their situation.  
The truth of the matter was that almost all of them _could_ read and more, of course, except perhaps for the youngest ones among them, who might not have gotten to learn much before the war ended. But being seen reading something, even a simple sign on a wall, was bound to get someone in trouble if they were caught. A slave was expected to behave as if he or she was _truly unable_ to read, even if it was not so. This was merely one of so many rules that seemed often all made just to further drive into their heads the point that there was no hope to be had of ever getting back on their feet, and that their race was forever condemned to remain on its knees.  
There were far more disturbing rules, going as far as controlling the positions a vampire could and couldn't assume –for example, the slaves were in theory forbidden to close their knees or their mouth completely. They were expected to always have their lips slightly parted and hold their knees open at least three inches apart at all times and regardless of where they were, even when no customer or no one else was present. It was meant as a permanent reminder that they were to be constantly open for the taking, in case their captors decided to _'make use'_ of their bodies. That rule at least wasn't always enforced as strongly out of training sessions, because it would be time consuming to make sure no one closed their mouth all the way at all times and all that, but whenever a handler or a customer felt in a bad mood, the slave with them could be sure he'd get in more trouble if they looked at him/her and his/her position wasn't absolutely right.

The last written material Kaname had truly gotten to touch was a children's book he'd read with Yuuki as a child, not long before their whole world came apart.  
It was a sad story about treasured things now lost, and it had often came back to his memory over the course of the past ten years.  
They'd cuddled up to each other on the sofa in her room the night they read it, and she'd somehow known that the book made him sad, and tried to comfort him by petting his hair— despite her being younger than him, something he found adorable.  
Perhaps it was precisely because she was younger that the story didn't have as much impact for her, but it had left quite the impression on him. Even now, he felt a lump in his throat at the memory of that book, because what had been merely a story back then had turned terribly true shortly afterwards, as the war ended and he – _no, they, all of their race_— had lost everything that they had ever held precious, all the way down to their freedom and the ownership of their own bodies.  
_At least she was safe._ If there was ever a single thought that could make anything seem less horrible for him, it was that.

If he'd been a lot younger when he was captured, he might actually have partially forgotten how to read – a fear that had never left him during those past years of doubting himself and lamenting how much he'd lost of who he once was. As he was old enough, he hadn't forgotten, but ten years of intellectual limbo could make someone more than a little rusty and prone to uncertainty.  
He'd taken to occasionally peeking from afar at the pricelist over the check-in counter of the 'house' and other such things in an attempt to check whether he had forgotten or not. Out of despair and fear of losing even more of it all, he'd found himself writing on the inside of the bathtub many times, using his fingers and his own blood, when he was washing his wounds in the morning and had more time than during the baths in-between customers. The blood washed away, leaving no traces for him to be punished for, but it made for a poor way of practicing, especially since by then he was far too exhausted and in too much pain.

Reading was like riding a bicycle in a way, but getting back into doing it fast and well took some time. Now that he finally had access to a book again, he immersed himself into it, but his initial difficulties inevitably played on his already well-established mistrust of his own abilities, and left him utterly ashamed of himself and how hard it was being.  
He constantly stole little glances at Zero to see if the hunter was paying attention to how slowly he was turning the pages. Luckily, Zero was absorbed by his own choice of reading, but in turn, that prompted Kaname to be torn between the embarrassment of seeing how much faster Zero could read, and the worry that inevitably, the hunter must have caught on and be ignoring him out of pity, to not further embarrass him.

Kaname had urges to skip pages, in those moments; anything so that he wouldn't seem so horribly slow, and by extension stupid. But he swallowed the shame and the counterproductive urges, and after about two nights of intensive attempts, he could notice with delight that things were getting much more fluid, that the words formed into coherent sentences much more quickly and that his eyes and brain could process it all so much more easily and faster.  
His cheeks colored with embarrassed joy when he noticed the additional collateral effect –he was playing far less badly than before. And Zero, supportive as usual, was quick to reassure him that he was just as free to play without worries as ever, when Kaname hesitated once more before putting the hunter's king in check, this time much more quickly than in their previous games. Zero was still an excellent adversary –and he'd studied the book in depth himself, getting far better than he was before— but Kaname noticed that he was catching up so much faster than he did in past games with the hunter. He remembered now so many things the years had made him forget, and was learning new ones, his gameplay becoming far more aggressive and self-assured, much to his own surprise even. It was still filled with his characteristic brand of caution and reflection, but definitely much more bold than before. It was as if the board had been covered in fog before, and now it all cleared up and the paths he should move the pieces in for each different strategy became so much clearer.  
It was the same for Zero, so they both got to enjoy progressing together. The ability to keep up with the other was one of the rare pure and innocent delights Kaname had in years, and Zero's fair play and kind encouragements, nurturing Kaname's successes instead of frightening him into stopping them, were an additional source of delight.

However much he told himself it couldn't last long, those days were a blissful respite for the pureblood. He was decided to enjoy them to his fullest for as long as they may last, regardless of how violently it would all probably end. And, much as he may know that it was a thing that wouldn't last, he desperately craved the silver-haired hunter's approval, and beamed with delighted pride each time Zero praised him for a good move or a victory.

Zero caught onto that right away, and had such difficulties to refrain from smothering the brunet in his arms in a bear hug, in response to how irresistibly _cute_ Kaname looked, all blushy and unguarded as they talked of chess. The needy look hidden in the vampire's dark eyes, that endearing flush that would take over his cheeks whenever Zero praised him, the way Kaname instinctively leaned into his touch whenever Zero caressed his head or face…

_It was absolutely irresistible. If society knew how adorable even a pureblood vampire could be, slavery would seem so much less acceptable._

Exchanging caresses was becoming second nature too, in part because Zero was urgently attempting to use those innocent touches to cover up for the _far_ _less_ innocent urges that inevitably awakened within him each time he saw Kaname.

Stroking the vampire's hair gently, pulling him into his arms, running a chaste caress down his arm or back, those were all ways for Zero to occupy his hands so that they wouldn't stray to _other_ parts of Kaname's body that were more and more tempting, especially when the pureblood left himself so obviously wide open to him, welcoming his caresses and melting into them so eagerly, practically boneless in his arms.

There were so many moments when the little voice of lust –not so 'little', in fact— clamored loudly in Zero's head that not only this place was a brothel, but the vampire would clearly let him do as he pleased to him. _Had Kaname not so effectively pleasured him by his own choice in the past?_

But each time Zero felt a little too close to succumbing to that undeniable temptation, each time that his caresses became a little too insistent, or started to stray closer to _certain_ _areas_ of the pureblood's body and get less innocent, he quickly recognized the spark of deep, out-of-control fear, not so well hidden in the garnet tinted eyes of the pureblood on the bed beneath him, or looking cornered against the bathroom wall, or anywhere they were when it happened. And immediately, the hunter remembered why it was absolutely vital that he not give in, no matter how tempting it might be.

_I won't be like everybody else. I won't rape you. I'll never take you against your will._

And so, each time he quickly pulled back, the caress reverting back to an innocent touch, a chaste embrace, a gentle non-threatening moment, in an awkward attempt to make it seems as if nothing had been about to happen just an instant before.

Zero was used to things being often black or white. That too was a distinct feature of the hunter mindset as a whole, and while it could also translate itself into the extremes of racial judgment that Zero disagreed with, it also translated, on a smaller scale, to a natural tendency to assume that if something seemed clear enough, then it must be so.

He knew Kaname had suffered all sorts of horrors, and one didn't have to be a genius to see the horrible scars the years of abuse had left in the vampire's psyche. Each time Kaname flinched or had to rein back in the automatic trembling in his hands when Zero got a little too close too fast, it was all so very obvious.  
The young hunter hadn't had experience with purebloods before him, but it didn't take a lot of mental effort to realize that Kaname's normal nature, if he'd grown up free, would most likely have been light-years away from the broken form he was now. The way the brunet attempted to brush it off and seem fine with things, or the way he tried to hide his hurt, many of those elements would probably have been the same since they were part of his instincts of hiding vulnerability by putting up a façade of control and strength, something that purebloods were known for, but so much of what Kaname might have been was shattered by the slavery following his race's defeat in the war.

With all that in mind, knowing how much the pureblood suffered, and seeing the so very obvious fear Zero saw in Kaname's eyes whenever he felt tempted to push things farther, the hunter naturally assumed that his advances were unwelcome.  
The urge to make those advances was still present because Kaname's presence was more and more irresistible to Zero, but the hunter forced himself to always stop right away each time he noticed he'd started to push things farther than it seemed comfortable for the vampire.

Ironically, as a result of that 'black or white' mindset, Zero didn't quite see the shades of grey in it, the difference between true fear and mere apprehension.  
Truth to be said, Kaname _was_ veering far more on the side of the former than the latter, so it was hardly easy to judge.

But each time Zero pulled back with an apologetic look on his face and his caresses made themselves innocent again after having strayed closer to not so innocent ones… Each time, instead of being merely relieved as the hunter assumed, Kaname was left quite puzzled, feeling oddly wistful and tingling with an unexpected and unspeakable need that ashamed him deeply.

_So on top of being a complete fool and opening up to this man so terribly much that he could easily destroy you whenever he felt like it, you still manage to whore yourself even further. _

_You __**want**__ him to bed you._

The pureblood flushed with shame at the inevitable accusing thought that shot through his mind --wishing he could lie to himself and somehow be convinced that the strange throbbing in his veins, the accelerated breathing and the sped up thrumming of his heart he was left with after Zero touched him were not all signs of desire.

.

.

_[tbc]_

* * *

_We continue with the chapter titles coming from songs by HIM. X3 And this one is extra special, because not only is it an utterly lovely song, but it's also the title of one of the very best fics of this fandom, **Blackened Wing's "Crimson Door".** :D  
If you haven't read it yet, you must have been living in a cave or have joined the fandom recently. XD *lol*  
Go, rush there and read it, it's pure delight. In fact, read the other ones too while you're at it. All of her fics are far ahead of the rest of us, and she is indubitably the best writer of our fandom. :D_

_And onto notes about CoB, is Ichiru as bad as he seems? XD; It all depends on that delicate balance between love and hatred. Whatever contributes to titling the balance the wrong way is a potential danger, so only time can tell… ;)  
But yeah, while Zero had an innate knowledge that all is not how it is, he's far from imagining just how dangerous Ichiru could be or how far he would go. :X  
The manga!Zero knew, because of what happened to their parents, and because of being turned. But in CoB, Zero never found out that Ichiru was Shizuka's accomplice, and as such, he is far from imagining how bad it could all go if Ichiru finally snaps. :X_

_I myself love Ichiru, but the whole situation with Zero and him etc. makes it too convenient to pass on having this danger coming from him in the fic. XD *can't resist*_

_I'm tempted to make the chapters slightly less long and update more often, instead of taking longer and releasing giant chapters. ^^; I'm not sure yet, because it will depend on my crazed Muses, so… XD; *lol*  
But yeah, sorry it took so long between last chapter and this one. :X_

_In any case, Zero & Kaname may be slow at first but you can see that things are definitely moving on for the two! XD  
Poor Kaname, he's too used to being hurt to be able to trust Zero, but he's completely falling for him all the same. XD_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

* * *


	19. Come closer my love…

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 19 – "Come closer my love…"**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Things heat up a notch, though just a tiny bit for now...well, sort of. XD You'll see.  
And inevitably, they're still angsting and wallowing in their usual worries, sorry. 8D;_

_(Again, sorry for the epic delay between chapters lately, especially since this time it took even longer than usual. ^^;)_

* * *

.

.

Zero didn't quite see the shades of grey in it, the difference between true fear and mere apprehension.  
Truth to be said, Kaname _was_ veering far more on the side of the former than the latter, so it was very easy to assume it was all sheer panic caused by the years of abuse.

But each time Zero pulled back with an apologetic look on his face and his caresses made themselves chaste again after having strayed closer to not so innocent ones… Each time, instead of being merely relieved as the hunter assumed, Kaname was left quite puzzled, feeling oddly wistful and tingling with an unexpected and unspeakable need that ashamed him deeply.

_So on top of being a complete fool and opening up to this man so terribly much that he could easily destroy you whenever he felt like it, you still manage to whore yourself even further. _

_You __**want**__ him to bed you._

The pureblood flushed with shame at the inevitable accusing thought that shot through his mind --wishing he could lie to himself and somehow be convinced that the strange throbbing in his veins, the accelerated breathing and the sped up thrumming of his heart he was left with after Zero touched him were not all signs of desire.

.

Signs Zero missed, and that Kaname was loath to admit even to himself, ashamed that he was by the so completely unexpected newborn sensations of apprehensive want, something he never felt towards the people brutalizing him each night. He was too used to sex being associated with pain and brutality, and wasn't sure how to deal with his own reactions, shocked that he could possibly want to be touched that way, unspoken as that desire may be.

The pureblood was still just as horrified of the idea of them going all the way, however. Not because his body didn't _want_ Zero to touch him –difficult to admit as that may be— but because the idea that Zero might be brutal and do it like all the others still utterly paralyzed the pureblood, instantly expressing itself in the terror in his eyes, that so effectively stopped the hunter's advances.

However much Kaname body may crave the hunter's touch, he was far too scarred mentally to welcome it without instinctive panic, and Zero's strong intention to not force the pureblood ended up always stopping him each time that he saw that panic showing more obviously in Kaname's eyes or body language.

Fellatio was one thing, Kaname still felt somewhat slightly more 'safe' and in control of his own body during it, and the times he'd done it for Zero had left him with the uncertain hope that at least it might maybe satisfy the hunter and dissuade him to go further right away, feeble as that hope may be.

But actual intercourse was a whole different thing, dangerously out of control and far too violent from Kaname's past experience. Something that was far too deeply associated with horrible memories and pain for him to easily overcome his fears.

Kaname knew as many sex techniques and positions as there were in the Kama Sutra, if not more, but he had no idea what '_making love'_ was.

His whole experience was based on being raped and attempting to survive it and come out of the whole ordeal with as less damage to his body and mind as he could manage, something that was far from being possible each time.  
He had trouble even simply _imagining_ being on the receiving end of sex without violence associated to it.

And however gentle Zero might ever be or however much Kaname might want to lose himself in the moment at hand, not even his desperate need for the man's gentleness and warmth could be enough to fool himself into thinking _a hunter _of all people, would 'make love' to him instead of raping him, if things came down to it.

Not even the last hopes hidden within his heart were strong enough to stand against the certainty in his mind, that told him that if that ever happened, Zero would have no reasons to continue playing that game anymore, and he would lose him, lose everything that currently kept him going.

He was determined to enjoy what little time he might still have with his 'Kiryuu-sama' being gentle to him, but he wasn't lost enough to fool himself into believing all the way an illusion that was so beautiful but also so impossible. He was certain it was just a matter of time and of Zero growing bored of the game and putting an end to all that gentleness.

And so, however much Kaname's body may be left tingling with frighteningly barely-contained need each time Zero touched him, the fear in his eyes was completely real and sent all the wrong signs to the hunter, interrupting him each time.

Zero warred a constant battle between the urge to caress that silky skin, and the idea that he shouldn't be touching the pureblood, since Kaname was apparently afraid of that contact.  
Meanwhile, Kaname's mental scars made him unable to understand –or believe— that Zero was actually stopping because of his obvious distress… So the pureblood remained puzzled, wistfully wondering what stopped the man, and paradoxically wishing against his best reason that Zero would push further, even if he was still too afraid to want to discover what might happen if the hunter really did…

It was a tragic thing, how much his body craved that man's touch so desperately and yet how much his mind dreaded it with a mix of utter panic and embittered hopelessness.

--

It was an odd time for them, made of changes and surprises. And not only when it came to the pureblood's mix of wistful desire and desperate resignation to what he believed was inevitable destruction sooner or later.

Zero too was changing, although it wasn't as radical or as sudden, probably because unlike Kaname's, Zero's life had so much more stability and safety that whatever changed for Zero did so based on the natural evolution of his feelings and beliefs, unlike the terribly uncertain way things were constantly shifting for Kaname.  
So while the pureblood went from an extreme to another between his halfhearted hopes and his utter despair, Zero changed slowly but certainly, little bit by little bit –even if in his own eyes the change was such that it was almost shocking to him, sometimes.

_Had it really been only a few weeks? Not even quite a full month yet…_

A bit over a month ago, Zero had been regularly refusing his colleagues ideas about going to the 'houses' for his coming of age thing, something that he'd deemed a stupid and cruel custom. He ended up going anyway just to shut the others up, but not in a lifetime could he have imagined he would meet someone like Kaname.

Before that fateful meeting, the young hunter had been focused on nothing other than becoming the hunter his parents had wanted him to be, the one that would make his master proud and provide a stable life for his brother and himself.  
And now… now he wasn't even sure anymore that him being a hunter really was morally right. Of course and unfortunately, there wasn't really anything he could do about it: You didn't choose to become or not a hunter, you were simply born one and that was it. From that point on, you may fail to fulfill your destiny or not, but in the event you turned out to be strong enough to become what you were born to be, escaping it wasn't such an easy feat. The rare few that wanted to died trying. It was ironically similar to the fact vampires couldn't escape their need for blood.

Zero might not be able to escape his destiny of being a hunter, but there was one thing he was sure of.

_Kaname was not the enemy._

And each day, he felt closer to the beleaguered brunet. In an almost painfully bittersweet way, because it was getting more and more difficult for Zero to find a non-worrisome explanation to why he felt that way, which made that he felt more and more inclined to not bother explaining anything to himself or to anyone. Let the world think he just came there for Kaname's body, and let his own mind focus on the moment at hand and not try to justify or explain anything. Better not know the name of that feeling than risk freaking out and trying to backpedal unsuccessfully all over again, like the previous time it happened.

And besides, who cared for the ideas of 'right' and 'wrong' that others had? _Did it really matter that anyone else would be utterly revulsed by him holding a slave in his arms gently? When that simple gesture felt so wonderfully good, and when Kaname was so irresistibly beautiful, shuddering softly in his arms?_

Sometimes, the future ahead seemed worrisomely bleak, when Zero lay in bed at home after returning late from the 'house', and thought of what might be happening to Kaname as the pureblood was left at the mercy of anyone coming into his room. It made Zero's jaw painfully taut with tension, his fists clenched tightly as the urge to hit those people rose more and more high.  
He'd long had urges to protect Kaname, but it was becoming stronger and stronger with time, and he was embarrassingly starting to realize it wasn't only about protecting him anymore – Strange feelings of protective jealousness were swelling in the hunter's chest, his concern for Kaname's wellbeing intermingling with a jealous rage towards anyone laying their hands on him.  
The hunter sighed, knowing well how counter-productive such feelings must be –hadn't Ichiru himself told him that jealousy was misplaced in such a situation, where just anyone was free to come by and have the pureblood's body for as long as they paid for it?

But then, Ichiru didn't know Kaname the way Zero did. It was impossible to know him and not want to hold him in your arms, protect him and keep all others at bay. _If only you could be mine and only mine… So that no one else would ever touch or hurt you…_

But he couldn't possibly be there at all times, could he? He had a life, a family, people he was supposed to live with… Obligations and needs that clashed with his other need, more and more urgent, to spend as much time as he could with the beautiful brunet, both to be with him as well as to reduce the amount of people hurting him, at least part of the time.

As it was, he was currently rushing to the 'house' everyday after work –unless Ichiru said he would be home— and spending several hours there playing chess and talking of random little things with the pureblood, before going home to sleep just a few hours before getting back up for work.  
If Ichiru was home, the night found itself even shorter, because then Zero ate at home with him, spent some time in his company, then rushed to the brothel as fast as he could, much to his brother's bemusement. And then came home even later than usual.  
It was even worse with Yagari. When Zero was a child, he spent so much of his time with his master training, but now that he was an active duty hunter himself, their different ranks made that they didn't get to see each other at work very often anymore. As a result, they usually caught up during dinners together and other such moments, which Ichiru often skipped. But with both of the twins deserting the Kiryuu home so often lately, neither had seen Yagari in a while, something the master hunter wasn't shy to complain about. Zero wondered guiltily what his master might be thinking was going on, by now.

The young hunter was trying to make those two lives work together without clashing too badly, but he was a single person, and after three or four days of it he was starting to find himself more and more tired, yawning throughout the day and feeling increasingly cranky and on edge.

Zero also continued to feel guilty for not spending as much time with Ichiru, which prompted him to try and hang out with him whenever it was possible the rest of the time.

Zero didn't quite realize, but Ichiru was seriously regretting having given his brother the impression that he terribly missed him due to Zero's visits to the 'house'. That unexpected sudden clinginess was somewhat getting on the younger twin's nerves.

While it was true that Ichiru still felt irritated and jealous when Zero scurried off to see Kaname, the truth was that the younger twin was a very independent person, and Zero's sudden bouts of _'let's spend time together!'_ were getting more and more annoying to Ichiru, who vaguely complained of the matter in his talks to Shizuka. She laughed heartily, before reminding him that he was merely reaping what he sowed.

After a few of Zero's attempts to catch Ichiru to spend time together in the mornings –or just about at any time he could find—, the younger twin was exasperated enough that he quickly made up an explanation about some gig his band supposedly got in a city a few hours away, and which would keep him out of home for a day or two, giving him a little momentary respite.

The plan had almost backfired, because apparently Zero had actually been in a mission to the outskirts of the city Ichiru mentioned in his story, and knew the city itself enough to be interested and ask questions.  
Ichiru on the other hand had never been there, so for a second he was at loss about how to reply when Zero asked about the venue the band would be playing at and other such things.  
But ultimately, the younger Kiryuu twin was far too good at distracting Zero, and after a vague promise to bring him a souvenir or some food specialty the area he would be visiting was famous for or whatever such thing, he managed to slip out of the delicate subject and quickly hurried off to pack a light suitcase 'for the trip'.

Shizuka couldn't help but laugh once more when Ichiru showed up at her door step with a bag over his shoulder, like a refugee fleeing his overly clingy brother.

.

The changes weren't all of the most visible type, but many were subtle little things that slowly but surely modifying things little and big in their daily lives.

For Kaname, it was a number of changes such as the fact that never before, had he had a visitor whose touch he really looked forward to, much as he also feared it. That alone was already a realization that left him quite puzzled, contemplating the implications of it when he had the luxury to be left alone by the handlers and customers for a moment, usually during the hours of the day the slaves were allowed to sleep to be rested for the next night.  
Or even simple things like the treats Zero brought for him, often from different pastry shops and bakeries. The pureblood had always had a sweet tooth, although the years of getting nothing but the disgusting filth slaves were forced to eat almost made him forget the taste of food altogether. And now he naturally found himself more and more delighted by all the little desserts and other delicacies, blushing softly in the dark as he imagined what little marvels the hunter might bring him the next time he came by, feeling his heart swell in his chest from how touched he was by those gentle attentions the hunter had for him. It was something that may not seem like much for anyone living a normal life, but for him it meant a whole world.

Zero too was experiencing subtle changes in his preferences even, such as the fact that he'd never had much of a taste for luxury before, but was now discovering all sorts of little things he was surprised to find out he enjoyed quite a bit. Not that he'd disliked it before, but he'd never known what to pick, nor had be felt any particular urge to go searching for expensive bath salts or other such things before, so it came as a surprise that he enjoyed such things so much now.  
In fact, of the twins, Ichiru was the one who had developed first a taste for such things, something that got more and more pronounced over the recent years, and which Zero had occasionally teased him for.

But now, spending so much time with Kaname made Zero discover various little things he hadn't gotten to before and that he hadn't known he liked. He would find himself feeling a little stupid on the way back to work from his lunch break, as he stopped by a luxurious shop specialized in bath implements, attracted by the lush window in which he'd spotted some of the type of things he'd seen in Kaname's bathroom.  
_Ichiru would laugh if he saw me bathing in rose petals after having been the one who used to poke fun at his fancy tastes…_ But of course, he still bought them, and a number of other things to make his own bathroom at home more pleasant and somewhat reminding of the sensual pureblood.

Zero was also starting to notice he missed Kaname more and more when he wasn't around him, and so surrounding himself with things that made him think of him was a way to counteract that a bit.

Even if the hunter didn't get to enjoy said little luxuries too often yet, considering that by the time he got home each night, he was so tired and it was so late that he only had time to shower in a hurry and get a few hours of sleep before he had to get ready to rush back out and head for the Association Headquarters again. He hadn't even gotten to try the _sombreuil _rose petals he'd purchased yet. But it didn't matter much since he was after all bathing with petals in Kaname's bathroom anyway. The pureblood knew of his liking for the fragrant petals and salts, and always prepared his bath with care.

.

There was a more worrisome side-effect to the lack of time caused by Zero's attempts to spend as much time as possible both at the 'house' and at home.

It had been just a few days, but the lack of sleep was making Zero more and more exhausted. If it was just the paperwork at the office, it wouldn't be much, but he pushed his body pretty far in his daily exercises, which was a necessity since the missions with his colleagues and even just the drills at the association were quite demanding. Which in turn also added even more to his tiredness.

It was an inevitable thing as a hunter, but it was not something that could coexist well with the exhaustion from regularly sleeping just a few hours per night. The weariness was starting to show more and more, although for now Zero was still in denial and pushing himself further, convinced that he could perfectly be just as functional despite the reduced hours of sleep each night.

Zero would have been just fine if it had been a matter of skipping sleep one time or another every so often, of course. But when done over and over day after day, it became a different matter altogether, as the young hunter would be reminded of in a rather unpleasant way, during a short mission outside the city the next day.

It was a single day trip, with the group leaving early in the morning and returning around the middle of the afternoon. They were supposed to patrol an area where there had been reports of survivor sightings, and capture or kill whatever they may find, as usual.  
It ended up lasting a few more hours than planned, and they returned late in the evening of the same day, the younger ones of the rookie hunters a little shaken, and Zero clutching his chest where a level E had slashed three nasty gashes with its claws… something that never would have happened if Zero's slowed down reflexes hadn't made him fire a tiny bit later than he'd have normally. That small amount of time had allowed the vampire to get close and had ultimately made the difference between a clean kill and Zero getting wounded before putting a bullet into the level E's head.

To the silver haired hunter's credit, he was still far faster than his colleagues of a similar age, even when sleep deprived and with slowed down reflexes.  
The only reason he'd gotten hurt and not them was because he was more experienced and by default was the one in charge of going in deeper before the others, when the group patrolling the ruins was formed of younger hunters.  
If it had been any of them that found themselves so close to the vampire when he lunged, they would never have gotten away with just a flesh wound like that.

Still, it was pretty mortifying, especially since the rookies looked up to him and he'd have preferred if they didn't have any additional reasons to loathe vampires as a whole. The constant indoctrination of the current society was bad enough without them getting additional ideas of revenge fueled by friends wounded in action or anything similar.

At least, they hadn't encountered any sane survivors, just three level E's that he dispatched partially on his own and partially with the help of the rest of the group as they caught up with him, so he was spared the guilt of capturing anyone and subsequently participating actively in the slavery system that disgusted him more and more.  
He'd gone to the mission with the secret intention to kill any vampires he found if he had no other way to avoid them being taken in to be shipped off to brothels. It was in part why he had left the rest of the group so far behind, so that there would be no witnesses standing around if he had to do it, but luckily, that dreadful decision would be left for another time.

He hadn't hesitated to fire this time either. Neither today nor during the previous mission. It seemed that in the fire of the action, he could rely on his hunter instincts to take over and make him as deadly as he was probably born to be, much as that thought may not be a pleasant one for other reasons.

The first time Zero had gone on a mission after getting closer to Kaname, he'd gotten hurt due to hesitating before shooting, and he had strongly worried that the intimacy that had been developing between the pureblood and him might affect him in his work. Now, not only he had been able to see it was not the case, but he wasn't even so sure anymore that what he _was_ was very moral.

Especially after the scenes he'd seen during the previous group mission, when he'd come to realize quite vividly that humans could be as bloodthirsty as vampires, even if not for the same motives. In a way, humans were even worse, because they lacked a natural physiological excuse for that need, and so such acts relied on cruelty alone.

Of course, he would never have had such thoughts about master Yagari or his late parents. But on light of the things the Association did to its captive vampires, and to the whole race in general by enslaving it, he was _**very**_ disinclined to bring back any live prisoners if he could avoid to, regardless of how immoral killing them may also be. At least when it was level E's the whole thing was made so much more simple –they weren't suitable for slavery, and the orders were to kill them on sight. The fact that there was no hope for them also removed all moral dilemmas on whether or not they could be considered innocent beings despite their race.

No other hunter would ever have stopped at such thoughts, automatically assuming instead that all vampires were guilty by default – for being born if not for anything else—, but each moment spent with Kaname made that idea more difficult for Zero.

_Even if they truly were beasts, it doesn't makes it right to do what we do to them._

He was very sure that Kaname, considering the age he'd been captured at by the end of the war, couldn't possibly be anything but innocent, pureblood or not. And he wasn't the only one. The little girl Zero had shot to save her from a future worse than death still haunted his dreams, even if it was not so much her as his conscience that couldn't find rest.

She'd asked him to let her die rather than live to be raped and enslaved, and he'd granted her wish, but the guilt was still there. And in Zero's nightmares, her blood-stained little face turned eyes full of sorrow towards her murderer as her cracked lips mouthed words of accusation. Usually, shortly before the image softened and turned into Kaname's face, much to Zero's horror. The hunter tried to rush towards him each time, but he could never make it on time to make a difference, and the brunet would smile weakly at him, closing his tired eyes and collapsing into a pool of his own blood, consciousness fading as life left his body, just as the hunter finally reached him. The pureblood's body would then shatter into a myriad of tiny crystal-like shards in Zero's arms, as the hunter cried out his name over and over as if that might stop him from dying. And inevitably, Zero always found his hands covered in Kaname's blood, and the Bloody Rose gripped tightly in his fist, even as he held Kaname, even as he screamed that it wasn't him, that he hadn't shot him, but nothing he did or said prevented the crumbling of the little shards of crystals.

Sometimes, he woke up drenched in sweat and wanting to throw some clothes on and rush to see the pureblood to make sure he was still alive, irrational as that urge may be, especially since he knew that he had to get ready for work and that the 'house' would be most likely closed at such an hour anyway.  
Other times, in more embittered days, the dreams made Zero wonder if perhaps that would be the best solution. The Kaname in his dreams never did seem to resent him for killing him, and despite the pain on his face, he looked so serene instants before fading away. No one would ever touch him brutally again, no one would ever be able to hurt him again. Wasn't a blissful oblivion better than the eternity of agony that the slavery and the brunet's natural lifespan automatically condemned him to?

Maybe the only way he truly had to save Kaname from the horror of his life in slavery, was precisely to take matters into his own hands and kill the young pureblood.

The 'house' owners would no doubt throw a fit, sue him for compensation, and demand that he repay them for the value of the pureblood, but compared to killing Kaname, that was the least of Zero's concerns, even if he had to work until the last of his days to pay the 'house' back.

_Kaname would finally be at peace… He would never again have to fear each next day and its wave of lecherous and brutal customers… never have to live in this abominable captivity again… He would finally be truly free, the way it was impossible for him to be in the current society…_

It would have torn Zero's heart to pieces to do such a thing, not to mention to lose the pureblood, but if it was the only way to save Kaname, then perhaps… Perhaps he could do to him what he'd done for the little vampire girl when she asked him to save her by killing her…

_Yes, but freedom in death… was it truly freedom if it was an eternal emptiness?_

The hunter wasn't quite sure whether notions such as reincarnation and others may apply to vampires –his own religious ideas on such subjects were a pretty eclectic mix— but he was more and more convinced that the age-old hunter beliefs that vampires had no soul was utterly wrong, just like much of the rest of the anti-vampire propaganda. It was hard to know what had a basis and what was grossly made-up, considering how many horrible vampire stories were told to reinforce the hunter population's hatred and contempt for them over the ages. Doctrines such as '_it's no crime to kill a vampire'_ should have been utterly shocking if 'vampire' was replaced by any human ethnicity, but because of how hunters viewed the vampires, it seemed so terribly natural. Zero himself had only come to realize how disgusting it all was simply because he'd gotten closer to Kaname.

No one could look at you with such sad eyes and have no soul. He could practically stretch his fingers and touch it, when Kaname was in his arms._ Screw whatever the founders of the Hunter Association or whoever may have to say. _

Nevertheless, having a soul or not didn't change things such as life or death, or how Zero's hands shook at the mere thought that maybe putting a bullet from the Bloody Rose in Kaname's head would be the only way to ensure the pureblood would be free from his suffering.  
_Short of changing the whole world and how society itself worked, that is… Or of wishing it was possible to turn back time and go back to the moment Kaname was captured and first sold off, to buy him before anyone hurt him or before the 'house' ever got its dirty hands on him.  
_Newly captured vampires were processed by the Hunter Association --with the usual brutality-- then sold in auctions to whoever paid more. Once that happened, and short of an intervention by the Hunter Association in case of the owner breaking their laws, it was virtually impossible to change who their belonged to. Unless an owner decided to get rid of his slave, which may be more common with individual owners, but almost never happened with brothels, other than if the slave was broken to such an extreme or so physically damaged that he or she became useless to the brothel and was passed down to an even seedier establishment or to a place harvesting their blood for other slaves.  
So other than death or something close enough to it --more than unlikely for a pureblood, to say the least--, it was unlikely for a slave in a 'house' to ever get out of it.

If there was a moral dilemma that could make Zero morose and cranky like nothing else even when at home trying to unwind, it was struggling with the idea of whether killing Kaname would be the only solution or not. On nights when he woke up thinking of it, the thought managed to make him toss around in bed without finding sleep again even when he was terribly tired.

Now on the other hand, as he returned from the mission with every intention to go see Kaname, it was not merely an abstract idea, but a most distressing thought to be having… especially since he wouldn't have the occasion to drop by home or the headquarters, and he felt rather uncomfortable going to the 'house' with such thoughts in mind and the Bloody Rose heavily weighing in the holster against his side, a permanent reminder of that dreadful option.

The wound Zero had suffered wasn't anywhere near life threatening, but it was a nasty gouge, and his colleagues were perfectly right to insist that he should go to the Association's infirmary, or at least to a nearby hospital if he didn't want to make the extra detour all the way there. Level E's had dirty claws, known to carry all sorts of filth and disease, which might or might not be contributing to the feverish daze the hunter was feeling.  
Of course, placebo went a long way, so perhaps it was not so much the filth and potential disease. A far more likely cause was the exhaustion, lack of sleep, exertion and blood loss all combined in one nasty combo, that were making him slightly dizzy, and giving him more and more trouble focusing and gathering his thoughts.

Zero's fingers tightened more around the cup of lukewarm coffee one of the other hunters had poured for him from a small individual thermos flask. He didn't want to risk dropping it, and with each turn it was a battle not to spill as he drank. They were all sitting in the bus sent by the Association, and would soon each part their ways to return home.

But the silver haired hunter's home was empty at the moment, and regardless of how much the others may insist for him to go immediately get medical attention, through his feverish daze there was only one place where Zero wanted to go.

He should have felt utterly foolish for feeling the need to see a vampire of all people when he was wounded. But for some reason, he felt a considerable need to see Kaname now, and to be with him. Not simply because he usually returned from missions with that habitual irrational need to see him and make sure he was fine, but for an even more dubiously acceptable reason.

He felt terribly tired, and the idea of going to some impersonal hospital right now, or even to his empty apartment alone, seemed so very undesirable.  
He much preferred the idea of being with Kaname, even if that meant waiting until the next day to get his wound patched up –he'd made the field dressing himself, and he was pretty sure the bandages alone would hold just fine. The nurse at the infirmary at work would probably yell at him for that the next day, but it's not like he'd die of it anyway. He even had the rest of his tiny emergency kit with some fresh bandages left, right in his pocket.

Needing someone's presence badly enough that he would delay getting stitches on such a large gash until the next day was already a little bit pathetic in itself…  
But needing that presence so much regardless of said person being and vampire, not to mention allowing himself to be in a vampire's company while wounded, was considerably worse, especially for a hunter of all people. So many times more unforgivable at the eyes of countless principles he'd grown up with.

_So what? _It wasn't the first ones he'd had to bend those principles to continue pushing forward that puzzling relationship he had with the dark-haired pureblood at the 'house'.

And so, Zero waved away the other's worries and assured them he'd go to the hospital as they kept insisting on. He got off the bus near the closest station through which he could get to the 'house' without making things so obvious for the others, and left quickly.

Not much long later, he was walking into the 'house', jacket tightly shut –not so much to hide the Bloody Rose as much as because his shirt was soaked in blood.  
But by now, it was late enough that there was no vampires in the display window, and the ones in their respective rooms or in the tea-house area, if they smelled anything, were too busy with their customers to take the risk to focus much on anything else. And by now Zero was one of the place's most assiduous regulars, so no one bothered checking on such things as they had done the first time he'd come by and rented Kaname, so even if someone had mentioned the smell of blood, it would probably be ignored.

The check-in attendant shot him a glance that distinctly said how much he thought Zero was looking like crap, and raised a surprised eyebrow when the hunter set a reservation of several hours despite how tired he seemed. Zero dispelled whatever curiosity the man might have quickly, with one of his best glares and a terse comment about how he was in need to _'work out some stress'_ before feeling ready to go back home and rest.

_That sort of language, now that was something these people always understood._

They couldn't comprehend, much less accept, even the mere concept of anyone having ideas of gentleness towards a vampire –taboo if there ever was one— but the idea of people wanting to come there to use them as punching bags at any hour, now _that_ anyone there understood and accepted so easily.

_And then, it's the vampires who are supposed to be the beasts_. Zero's glare grew harder, if possible.

If not for knowing that it was necessary to remain on their good side to be able to pass in front of random customers and other such benefits that being a regular brought, he wouldn't even bother explaining anything at all. He wished he could just send them all to hell, and never have to bother looking like he condoned the disgusting way they treated the slaves, but if he did that, he might be barred from visiting the place, or even simply be made to wait hours and hours without end at the teahouse area, never sure when he'd be able to see Kaname or not.

Mankind had been steadily falling lower and lower, in Zero's eyes. But at the moment he was too busy concealing the feverish state he was in, to spend too much time musing on such ideas. He simply filled up the paper, paid for the advance fee and quickly went upstairs.

--

Upstairs, Kaname had been in the bathroom, cleaning up yet once more that evening.

He was standing with difficulty due to the previous customer having tried to see how easy or how hard a pureblood's knees might be to break.

Luckily for Kaname, it was far from easy breaking _anything_ in his body –otherwise, he was sure he'd be sporting broken bones almost constantly, with how rough most of the customers and handlers were to him—, and the customer hadn't been motivated enough to try too hard or for too long after all, so the pureblood got out of it mostly just with swollen joints and pain rather than anything actually broken or even dislocated like it occasionally happened.  
He'd pretty much just escaped without worse injuries because the man had tired of hitting him and had decided to switch instead to 'more pleasurable activities'… Well, pleasurable to the man, in any case. As for Kaname, all he could do was try to push the horrifying sensations and the brutality to the back of his mind, not having the time to allow himself to break down any time soon.

The pureblood's hands were shaking, but it was like that each night anyway. He would just have to put up with it all until dawn at least, and finally allow himself to break down after closing hours only, during the resting time.

It was vital to stay focused on the moment at hand to survive each night, so as usual Kaname tried to ground himself to the more immediate things in hopes it might distract him of all the horror. Currently, it was about drying up fast enough to be ready on time and not get a beating from the next customer or a random handler checking on him and finding him late.

He'd already changed the bed sheets after the customer left, and was mostly ready for the next person anyway, so he allowed himself the time to do a brief inspection of the random bruises on his face, neck and shoulders, gotten from the previous customer and any others before him. The web of marks marring the brunet's pale skin was the fruit of random cruelty, handler abuse, or simply people finding one of their hands free while claiming him and deciding they might as well use it to hit him.  
There was a particularly nasty blueish bruise by his jaw, along with various smaller ones nearby, but the worse marks were the ones on his forearms and hips, along with the ones on the upper area of the back of his tights, and on his rear. He hated those especially, because they all told a very clear story of what happened to him at the hands of the customers throughout each night.

It wasn't because his silver-haired protector spent many hours with him, that he was any safer from the others the rest of the time. He was constantly at everybody's mercy, not only during the 'house's business hours, but even at other times when a handler randomly felt the need to produce whatever excuses to reassert their authority over him with a new bout of violence.

The determination making Kaname think he could go on surviving each night faltered momentarily. It was an effect the sight of the blemishes always had on him, bringing with it the reminder of every single touch, every single grip, every single blow, every single thrust into him. Every single tear he'd shed, every single cry of pain or simply of sheer horror as yet another stranger forced his legs apart and brutally penetrated him.

He gripped the side of the sink cabinet and bit his lower lip, blinking rapidly to dispel the tears that had threatened to well up in his eyes. _Crying now would only be even worse._  
Some of the tears were from anger. But he didn't have any pride left to try and deny to himself that the rest of them were just from how horrifying it all was, and would always be, regardless of how often it happened. It wasn't pride or shame anymore, at this level, it was too much to put in words, too much pain and fear and horror all at once. He could never 'grow used' to it all, the mind-scarring horror never ended and always came in some new variation that managed to horrify him even more.

Sometimes, he almost envied the weaker minds that broke completely so much sooner, growing used to the abuse and sinking into some sort of numbness where maybe it hurt them a little less when they were too far gone and their minds simply shut down. When he saw the glazed eyes of one of the more broken slaves, he wasn't sure whether to be afraid of having such a fate, or to secretly envy them for their momentary escape, punished as they might be for it also.

But whether because he was a pureblood or because he was _unfortunate_ enough to be stronger than them, he had never had that respite.

Not that he hadn't grown 'used' to being abused, to a certain point, but it was different. It scarred him in ways that left him terribly shaken and near panic on so many occasions, but it never managed to make him _numb_, or make him used to the acts in a way that might make them any less painful.

In a way that strength was a curse, making it worse for him than it would be for someone broken enough to be near catatonic and unable to feel as much pain.

_Strength! What strength?! If there's one thing I do not possess one bit, it must be that…_

He grit his already painful teeth in an attempt to regain control of his wandering thoughts. Bitterness spread inside him once more, denying the strength that he _did_ have, but that simply wasn't enough.

He raised an unsteady hand to wipe away the blur on the sides of the mirror fogged up by the vapor of the bath. Not his own bath, naturally; the previous customer's one. Slaves were made to take quick cold showers, not waste time or money with baths, unless they were ordered to take one in someone's company, of course.

The bleary-eyed image in the mirror returned his weary gaze, filled with misery and a certain amount of anger against himself. Anger that he could not be a little more like whoever he might have been born to be, anger at all his weaknesses, both physical and mental.

Not long ago, it would also have been anger for allowing himself to rely so much on the silver-haired hunter who visited him more and more regularly… but now, everything was so confusing. He found himself putting that feeling aside and wishing desperately that the man would come any time now, either to save him from anymore horror for that night, or more likely, to at least give him some much needed hours of respite.  
Undeniably, he was angry at himself for the fact that every second of the day had become a second of waiting and hoping the hunter would come to see him. But he was incapable of mustering anger against the man himself for completely capturing his heart, and he found himself more and more dependent on him.  
He only truly felt alive when Zero was there, and much as he might know well that he needed those moments to be able to keep going on, he inevitably also realized very well what that dependency meant and how much worse it would all be later.

When his precious silver-haired protector finally decided to crush him, he wouldn't have to make any effort to do so, removing his presence might be all that was needed…

But right as he was about to enter a countless cycle of dwelling and self-accusation until the next customer arrived, his musings were brutally interrupted by a shocking scent, so unmistakable and easy for him to recognize that it almost physically jarred him.

_Kiryuu-sama's blood?! But…!!_

Without thinking, he dropped everything and rushed for the door of the bedroom, from where he could smell it so much more clearly as the man approached in the corridor.

Even at times when doors were unlocked, it was forbidden for a slave to open their room door of their own accord, and if a handler was anywhere in the corridor and saw, there would be hell to pay for it. One way or another, they were always watching, and it was impossible to make it downstairs without passing by the most crowded areas and being caught anyway, so no one ever really bothered trying to exit their rooms or open their doors and risk getting punished even more.  
However, that wasn't truly the reason why the pureblood wasn't latching for the doorknob right about now.

As he got to the door, Kaname's instinctive worries for his protector had been suddenly interrupted by the memory of what had happened the previous time the hunter had visited him after getting hurt during a mission.  
He remembered perfectly clearly the confrontation they'd had. Zero's questions that Kaname couldn't bear to answer because it would mean confessing painful things about his past and Ichiou. The hunter's fury, contrasting so terribly with the usual kindness, and inviting the pureblood's defiance in return, much as it felt like it had happened light years away in the past, something impossible for him to replicate as he was now.

And then the brutal instants that followed, and during which the otherwise gentle hunter had nearly raped him.

_Would the same happen again now? _

Worse, would the hunter go through with it this time…?

The previous time, it seemed like it had all been triggered by him showing concern for the hunter's wounds. If he ignored the issue completely, was there a chance of getting out of tonight more or less unscathed, or was the hunter coming there with clear intentions already, from which he couldn't possibly hope to escape? Kaname pressed his fingers together to still their trembling at the idea.

He didn't know that Zero's anger the previous time was born because of the hunter's fear that Kaname's presence was affecting him and his performance as a hunter, rather than because of what the pureblood had said or done that day – until their confrontation _started_ at least.

But whatever Kaname may believe or think he should do, he was unable to mask his concern for the hunter, from the moment Zero opened the door and stepped in with an exhausted look on his face and an arm around his own chest, no longer trying to hide that he was in pain now that no one else but the two of them could see it.

"Kiryuu-sama!!"

The pureblood rushed forward, then froze in place when he realize what he was doing. He almost took a step back, fearing the worst, but by then Zero had finished fully stepping in and the door had closed behind him. The hunter pressed his back against the door and addressed the brunet a soft smile to try and dispel at least part of his worries about his intentions –Kaname wasn't the only one who remembered acutely the fiasco the previous time a similar situation had happened.

"Don't worry, Kaname… I'm fine, I just… need a little moment of rest, that's all."

The reassurance was more to say that the pureblood didn't need to be afraid of him, than really to talk about his wounds, truth to be said. Now that he was finally there, Zero was torn between wildly contradictory urges.  
A part of him was glad to be with Kaname, looking forward to spending time in his soothing company and hopefully cooling off a little after the stressful day. But another part of him was feeling suddenly odd about being there at a moment when he felt slightly dizzy and rather vulnerable, a feeling the hunter wasn't used to.  
Normally, it was always the other way around, and while it saddened him that Kaname was constantly on the receiving end of that sort of feeling, it didn't mean he felt in any hurry to switch around and be the vulnerable one, especially in a vampire's company, regardless of who that vampire was.

But when Zero stepped forward and faltered for a second –immediatly kicking himself inwardly right as it happened, for having let the pain he was feeling affect him to that point – the hunter was surprised to find that he didn't feel angry when Kaname instinctively reached forward and caught him.

In truth, if Zero had actually fallen Kaname would most likely be unable to catch him and they would both fall to the ground –the drugs in the vampire's body made him far too weak to possibly withstand carrying the weight of the hunter's distinctly muscular build.  
But as Zero had merely staggered for a very short moment and quickly caught himself, Kaname's support was luckily not really needed… at least, not the way it had been originally intended, as support to help the other with balance, but the contact was most definitely very welcome. Zero found himself leaning in and reveling in the softness of the brunet's skin and the pleasant scent of his hair, instead of pushing the vampire away for the audacity of assuming a hunter had been about to fall.  
Kaname had apparently been completely expecting the latter to happen, and clung to the hunter nervously, almost not believing it when the shove he was bracing for didn't come.

Awkwardly, the pureblood tried to guide the hunter towards a small sofa not too far from the entry, not wanting to imply that he needed to sit, but nevertheless worried about him staying on his feet in that state.  
Zero appreciated the silent concern, and didn't have the energy to argue at the moment, so he didn't bother finding a reason to resist and simply gave in for once.

The sofa was small and delicate, as well as exquisitely ornate, like much of the matching furniture of the room. It was no wonder, as such things were the fruit of pillages taken place around and shortly after the end of the war.  
The great manors of the best vampire families had unwittingly ended up furnishing the more luxurious rooms in brothels and whorehouses all over the great hunter cities… And while Zero had never wanted to probe as far as asking Kaname directly, he did suspect that the furniture in Kaname's room might very well have been actual furniture from his house back before he was captured.

With some changes, naturally – the hunter spared a quick glance at the reinforced base of the bed, made to withstand constant use each night and displaying clearly visible d-rings all along the edges and other 'strategic locations', to secure restraints and cuffs of various types for any customer who may be into bondage or simply prefer having the slaves tied down.

Kaname had, for once, missed what the hunter was looking at, too busy worrying for him and trying to come up with a way to ask whether he was okay. _Ideally one that didn't involve incurring his wrath and suffering some horrible punishment._  
Zero was torn between feeling guilty and finding the pureblood's concentrated look completely adorable. He finally opted for smiling reassuringly and breaking the ice a little.

"Ah well, I just got hurt a little during a mission earlier today. It's nothing at all, I'll be like new in no time. It's nothing for you to worry about...okay?"

For a second, Kaname froze wondering if him worrying was indeed a dangerous thing, but Zero made sure to finish his sentence with as gentle of a tone as he could muster, to make sure he conveyed the meaning that he really did meant it, and not that he was getting annoyed at the pureblood's attentions like the previous time he'd been wounded.

Truthfully, Zero was more than a little touched –and deeply surprised— by Kaname's obvious worry for him, and didn't want to dissuade him, far from it. He was used to being concerned for the pureblood's injuries because he felt that unexplainable urge to protect him and Kaname got hurt _really_ often, but he'd never considered that the brunet might return the feeling in any way.

In the hunter's eyes, it was one thing for him to simply give in to his urge to comfort the wounded vampire each time he found him in a terrible state, or even for him to know that to a certain point, Kaname undeniably enjoyed his company –if anything, because Zero didn't beat or rape him, which must be a serious advantage over the others...—, but it was a completely different thing to find out that the pureblood actually _cared_ for him enough to be afraid for Zero's safety and worry about his wounds, something completely unexpected of a vampire, especially from a hunter's point of view. Even if it was the point of view of one that had gone through all the changes of heart and of ideas that Zero had gone through over the past few weeks.

It was a _very_ touching and surprising discovery, even if it also made Zero's guilt burn so much stronger. _The previous time something similar happened, would Kaname have been so adorably worried too, if I hadn't pushed him away back then and reacted so brutally?_  
Furthermore, wouldn't Kaname be so much less afraid at the present moment, if not for said brutal reaction the previous time?

The pureblood seemed currently torn between displaying his concern openly or keeping some distance, however much it was practically written all over his features that the former was obviously winning over the latter.

Awkwardly and hesitantly, Kaname made an offer that he could only hope would not end with tragic results.  
"Kiryuu-sama… Uhm, I… I could maybe help…" He blurted the words out, before rushing to add, even faster "…if you don't mind it, of course!"  
The color momentarily drained from Kaname's face as he worried, then returned quite quickly to blossom into an attractive blush when Zero found the brunet's little outburst even cuter and laughed softly.

Zero's laughter started normal but quickly turned into a sort of cough, as the gash in the hunter's chest was quick to protest the laughing with a sudden spike of pain. It looked like maybe he should take the vampire on his offer after all…

If Kaname had been a pureblood in full possession of his powers, he could have made the hunter's pain vanish easily. Even without having recourse to any special abilities, he could have with his saliva or blood alone, blocked the pain or healed the wound completely, although of course, the saliva option would have heavy consequences without the anti-vampire drugs currently in the brunet's body –saliva was precisely what purebloods used to turn humans into vampires, and while it would normally have had to be injected into the prey's blood stream via a bite and in enough quantities for the change to happen.

However, Kaname couldn't be farther from being _'a pureblood in full possession of his powers'.  
_In fact, the anti-vampire drugs were present in his blood at such high quantities, that even if he'd still _had_ his fangs and wasn't too weakened to even pierce a human's flesh with them as he was now, his saliva wouldn't have been able to turn anyone regardless of him wanting to or not.

Zero knew it in theory and had also put it to practice the last time he'd let Kaname to drink from him, allowing the pureblood to touch the cut directly with his lips and tongue.

_So it wasn't very different now, was it? _

It still remained nevertheless true that no sane hunter would ever leave a pureblood the chance to bite them or even just touch an open wound with their saliva, simply for the sake of the taboo alone, regardless of said pureblood being drugged beyond belief and completely harmless.

Zero couldn't help but remind himself that on the other hand, it wasn't very far of a leap, compared to letting Kaname drink from him with his mouth right against the cut on his arm like they'd done last time…

The pureblood looked embarrassed, unsure of how to take the other's sudden silence, and the tip of a delicate pink tongue hesitantly peeked out to wet his lips, trying to regain some countenance. For a moment there, Zero stared at it and felt as if all the blood in his body had rushed to a specific location at the sight… and it was nowhere near the wound Kaname was offering to help him with.

_Ah, what the hell, why not?!_

He was always the one helping Kaname. If the pureblood was so willing to offer him some sort of assistance now, there was no reason not to accept it. After all, considering the situation, even if Zero had been even more badly wounded than he was, he could still easily overpower the weakened pureblood, so vulnerability wasn't _truly_ an issue.  
At least not real vulnerability –it was more about feeling uncomfortable in such a position, and a matter of trust, mostly. He knew he felt close enough to Kaname to bathe with him and lay in bed with him doing all sorts of things while trying desperately to not give in to the temptation to just throw it all to the wind and take him, yes, but was it enough closeness to open up to Kaname and allow him to take care of his wounds…?

_I guess we'll find out. _

With that thought in mind, Zero unzipped his jacket and slid his arms out of the sleeves with a grunt, the wound on his chest not taking too well the movements. The Bloody Rose was now in full sight, secured in its holster against Zero's left side, and Kaname froze for a moment as it was revealed, but Zero had foreseen that it would be bad to leave it like that, and quickly unbuckled the holster and slid it off his shoulders. Or at least as quickly as he could in his state.

He groaned softly and dropped the gun in its holster and the jacket over it, then the light protective gear he'd been wearing beneath it, making a pile of it a bit farther from him on the sofa, successfully hiding the gun completely before gesturing for the pureblood to come closer.

Under other circumstances, Kaname might still have been worried by the closeness of the weapon, if not for the fact he was currently too busy dealing with something else altogether: The smell of blood was much stronger now, and the moment the jacket was off, Kaname's eyes flared red immediately, the wave of that deliciously alluring scent hitting him hard.  
Unlike Zero's jacket, that had been open while the hunter was fighting and as such escaped the enemy's claws, the front of his shirt was torn and soaked in blood.

To Kaname's credit, he was worried enough for the hunter that the wave of uncontrolled thirst surprisingly washed away as fast as it came –or more exactly, it was crushed down through a colossal amount of willpower—, and his eyes returned almost immediately to their garnet-tinted chocolate warmth, filled with concern and completely sincere.  
When Zero looked up and beckoned for him to come closer, the pureblood did without hesitation despite the maelstrom of barely hidden need and bloodlust threatening to break loose within him and shatter his very stretched control.

With trembling fingers, Kaname unbuttoned the hunter's shirt and slid the halves of the torn, bloody cloth aside to reveal the lean planes of Zero's chest, currently covered in a quickly-put-together field-dressing composed of large whitish bandages wrapped all around him to cover the injured area.

The pureblood hesitated on how to proceed from there, but Zero saw the uncertainty all over his features and murmured a 'go ahead' in a reassuring voice, before tugging at the tip of the bandage to free it from where it was tucked under. It unwrapped quite easily from there, in between Kaname's extremely careful movements and Zero's occasional soft chuckling at the fact that he kept having to reassure the pureblood that he wasn't doing anything wrong, each time that Kaname worried whether he'd pulled too hard or gotten too close to the other.  
The bandage stuck now and then, but it mostly came loose without trouble, as the wound was fresh and hadn't had time yet to dry and stick to the bandage.

The pureblood's eyes flared red for a moment again, when he got to take in the full sight of the gash.  
Gashes, to be more exact, as on top of the largest one, there was a slightly less deep one parallel to it, as well as a bit of a third one as well, that last one not quite covering the full width of the hunter's chest as far as the other two. It wasn't hard to see that when the enemy swung at Zero, two of the claws had found purchase, a third one had just grazed him and the remaining two had missed.

But this time it wasn't hunger that made Kaname's eyes red. It was fury, at the one who had wounded his precious hunter. A possessive fury that he'd never expected to feel, much less in such a situation.

_A vampire had done this. Another vampire had dared to lay his hands on this man and mark his skin this way._

And if he could, Kaname would have gladly torn said vampire to pieces.

Nevermind that in his current state, the pureblood wouldn't have lasted one second, even against a level E. The fury was still there nevertheless.

Zero was watching him curiously, and couldn't help but feel the corner of his lips curl up when Kaname finally asked, "What… what happened to the person who hurt you like this, Kiryuu-sama…?"

The anger directed at said person was unmistakable in the pureblood voice, hesitant as it may sound when asking a question to Zero.

"He's dead… but thank you anyway, I still do appreciate the feeling." There was a distinct amusement in the hunter's voice, although it was of a good-natured genre rather than sarcasm, ridiculous as the situation would have seemed to any other hunter. Zero didn't find it ridiculous –he found it touching, if a little bit embarrassing.

The glint in Zero's eyes, however, left no doubt as to who had put an end to the level E's life, and a cold shiver ran up Kaname's spine, at the reminder of what the man regularly did to other vampires.

That uneasiness passed quickly however, as the hunter's mirth dawned in on the pureblood, and Kaname flushed quite red, knowing well that the hunter had seen through him and was amused by his vengeful moment on his behalf. He was a little glad that Zero hadn't pointed out how unable to avenge him Kaname would have been, in his current state.  
_I should settle for being glad he's amused rather than angry. It could be so much worse. _He'd been dreadfully afraid that the hunter might see through his feelings, perceive them as an unwelcome possessiveness and punish him for it. It wouldn't have been surprising, considering how hunters expected slaves to be sexually utterly submissive and completely passive --possessiveness implied a certain measure of feelings that were forbidden for vampires in the current society.

_But then, it's Kiryuu-sama we're talking about… If it had been any other hunter, I would have already gotten a hundred beatings for all of this instead of ever getting in such a situation in the first place._

The current situation, to be exact, was that Zero was sitting with his legs partially spread while leaning back on the sofa to be in a more comfortable position, and Kaname, by lack of a better way to get close to the man's chest, was standing between the hunter's legs. The pureblood's knees were partially bent and pressing onto the edge of the sofa, his hands leaning onto the sofa on each side of the hunter, for better support and because his knees were still terribly painful from earlier.  
The brunet's face was hovering a few inches above the hunter's wound, and he glanced up as if in need of one last confirmation that he hadn't misunderstood the other's acceptance of the help he'd offered, and that he really was truly allowed to touch him.

When Zero nodded again and gestured to indicate that he could indeed go ahead, Kaname let go the breath he was holding in his worry, and dipped his head lower, tentatively licking the wound.

Kaname wasn't even sure whether his saliva would be able to truly make a difference at all, considering how the anti-vampire drugs blocked so perfectly his abilities and interfered even with other natural things for vampires, but… from past attempts licking some of his own wounds by lack of a better option when he was hurt, it seemed that the anti-septic and numbing properties of it were still there, even if they were much less effective because of the drugs.

Without the drugs in his blood, a mere tiny amount of Kaname's saliva would have been sufficient anesthetic to quickly take care of such wounds, but with the way things were, it wouldn't be quite as easy.

Touching the smaller of the three gashes with the very tip of his tongue, the pureblood continued to carefully 'test the waters', more out of instinct and ingrained uncertainty than because he really expected Zero to do something.  
The hunter simply shifted a little to lean more fully against onto the back of the sofa, and Kaname pushed on, licking the wound more fully now, lavishing the first gash with attention and cleaning the surrounding area before moving to the second one. It was larger, deeper and naturally much more painful than the other one. The hunter tensed when the vampire's tongue touched his wound, but didn't stop him or outwardly show any displeasure. The pain was dulling off and being replaced slowly by an odd tingling. The smaller gash was tingling less now, the weird sensation turning little by little into a vague numbness that wasn't unpleasant in the least, compared to the throbbing pain Zero had been feeling ever since he got hurt.

The hunter shuddered softly now, pleasantly surprised by the effects of the pureblood's saliva. He hadn't been sure if it would work, and so it was a pleasant discovery, but a part of him was inevitably uncomfortable as well, because it was impossible not to think of the _other_ properties of a pureblood's saliva… Zero knew that Kaname was far too drugged for his saliva to be able to turn someone, even if the 'house' didn't tear off his fangs each time they grew again anyway, but seeing the brunet's mouth right over wounds dug by another vampire's claws was certainly an odd sight for a hunter, much as Kaname's ministrations may be utterly gentle and careful, as well as unexpectedly pleasurable –Zero's shudder hadn't been entirely because of the diminishing pain or the tingling.

The hunter was naturally distracted by all of it, but his attention returned immediately the moment a muffled gasp of pain softly escaped the brunet in front of him.

Kaname had been focusing all his attention on the wound, to better fight his own instincts and the constant starvation he lived with. His eyes were tinged with a glaze of red that deepened a little more each instant. He was practically trembling from how thirsty he was, but he went on making sure to do nothing but what he'd promised to do, and to resist the temptation to try and suck at the wound to get blood from it, which would be inevitably painful, not to mention would break the trust the hunter had accorded him by allowing him to do this for him.  
By cleaning and desensitizing the wounds, Kaname was inevitably getting _some_ blood, but it was such a small amount that far from even beginning to quench his need, it only made him even more painfully hungry, if it was possible.

And even though the hunter had given him blood a few times in the past, the pureblood knew better than hope it would happen again. Much less happen casually and for no reason, when he wasn't badly wounded or anything.  
No, if he were to make his hunger obvious, there was no telling what might happen, and how the hunter might react, especially if it happened in such a situation. It was imperative that he hide his thirst completely, but that was of course far from being easy.

Starvation was like coiled steel; a spring taut and ready to snap with each waft of that irresistible scent, with each of such a painfully insufficient amount of the other's blood, torturing the brunet by making his need so much more intense.  
The shaking had worsened, and Kaname had started to try and remain in control by focusing his mind on a different pain to avoid letting the bloodlust take over. His knees were still extremely painful, and leaning on them against the couch was bad enough already, so when the hunger threatened to run out of control completely, the pureblood resorted to digging his fingertips against the swollen and painful joints to distract himself, but his plan backfired as he pressed a little too hard at one point and gasped in pain, attracting the hunter's attention.

"Kaname…?"

"Ah… It's nothing, Kiryuu-sama, I'm sorry…"

But the hunter could see well that it was anything but 'nothing'. He hadn't noticed before how badly bruised the brunet's knees were looking, because of his own injury and how bruised Kaname often was anyway, but now that he got a better look at it, he kicked himself inwardly for having left the pureblood stay in such a position when he must have been hurting so badly.  
If it wasn't obvious already from the bruises and the swelling that Kaname's knees must be killing him, the unbalanced way the pureblood stood as if about to fall made it even more obvious, since he'd been holding onto his knees now instead of balancing himself on his hands anymore, which visibly made the whole position even more awkward.

"It's _not_ nothing, Kaname… You should tell me when you're hurt. I'm the one who should be sorry for not having noticed before. Come here." And as if it was the most natural thing, the hunter automatically wrapped an arm around the pureblood's waist and pulled him closer, his other hand sliding behind one of the brunet's wounded knees to carefully lift it and ease him onto his lap, before both suddenly froze in place.

In any other moment, Zero would inevitably have realized the implications of the position he was putting them in, long before such a thing happened. But currently, the hunter was exhausted, still in pain, and not thinking very straight. In his hurry to try and get Kaname in a position where his knees wouldn't have to support his weight –but where hopefully Kaname would still be able to continue his enticing ministrations on the hunter's wounds— Zero didn't realize right away that he was making the pureblood straddle him.

There was a moment of complete silence and embarrassed tension on both parts –especially Kaname's, as he was inevitably wondering if he was in any immediate danger— but Zero managed to shake out of the embarrassment and laugh it off in a apologetic manner that was earnest and reassuring, so Kaname decided that perhaps it was okay to postpone worrying as much about it all, at least for a little longer.

That idea became more and more uncertain in the following moments, though.

Aside from the fact that the pureblood was still stuck with the same problem of fighting his starvation and needs to remain in control while he tended to the hunter's wounds, the position they were in now was an additional thing to be concerned about. With the way they were sitting, face to face with the pureblood's legs on each side of the hunter's hips, it was impossible not to feel the contact of each other's body through the clothes, made even more intense with each little shift of either of them.

Kaname was at least glad that he'd had the time to put on underwear before Zero arrived –if you could call the black thongs the 'house' supplied '_underwear'_. It was the standard thing worn beneath the bondage gear they were made to wear for the customers, and since Kaname had just showered when Zero arrived, he wasn't wearing the full gear yet.

Although technically, none of the things he was allowed to wear would have shielded him from the feeling of the hunter's crotch brushing against his with each of their movements anyway–anything the 'house' made the slaves wear was merely there for the purpose of further enticing the customers, and didn't really offer much coverage nor any protection.

The pureblood's mouth felt dry. He wasn't sure whether it was because he didn't have that much moisture to spare to begin with, because of how deprived he was of blood, or if it was simply from how nervous he was. He was resorting to making little pauses and biting the sides of his tongue more and more often, to try and coerce it to produce more saliva so that he may go on coating the hunter's wound and desensitizing it. The biting didn't hurt much per se, but he thought Zero might stop him if he realized, and he was determined to go all the way, so he was careful not to let the hunter see he was having difficulties. He didn't want to fail Zero, especially not when he had such a rare occasion to be the one helping with his wounds, when it was so often the opposite.

Luckily, Zero was also far too focused on something else to notice Kaname's little pauses or whatever methods he might be using to induce salivation.

At the present moment, the hunter was trying desperately to think of all sorts of repulsive things to keep his mind in track and prevent his body from reacting to the soft weight sitting so irresistibly on his lap.

Kaname bent a little further to reach better the edge of one of the gashes, and his hips shifted slightly in the process, sliding back against the hunter in a way that worsened the flush on Kaname's face… and that sent a spike of molten lava-like heat straight to Zero's groin.  
The hunter clenched his teeth. _Noooo, quick, think of something gross! Think of something gross!! _

Unappealing as the thoughts the hunter was trying to muster may be, Kaname's presence was just too tempting, and half the difficulty wasn't simply for Zero to convince his body not to react, but for him to convince _his mind_ not to make up excuses to just flip them both to the side, tumble the sensual brunet onto his back on the couch and thoroughly ravish him.

Any mind images of an old lady in underwear or other squicky things Zero had been trying to focus on to hold back his arousal promptly disappeared at _that_ thought though, swiftly replaced by the idea of Kaname on his back in the couch, legs spread for him, arms around the hunter's back as Zero thrust into him, those garnet eyes dark with pleasure and his voice hoarse from too many cries of delight.

Zero had seen the pureblood looking miserable and close to begging far too often, and he intensely wanted to see what face Kaname would make in the throes of passion rather than with apprehension or pain. He was sure it would be breathtaking.

By the time the hunter's mind came floating back from the high spheres of sensual temptation it had been momentarily spirited away to, the battle between mind and body had ended with a resounding defeat on his body's side –the mind had been too distracted, and now the hunter's arousal was throbbing hard and straining against his pants…and from the look on Kaname's face, it was pressing quite unmistakably against him without leaving any room for wondering what the hard bulge was...

There was no mistaking the barely concealed fear on the vampire's face –in fact, it was only because Zero was currently wounded and was always so kind that said fear hadn't turned into full panic just yet.

But no matter how much Kaname tried to reassure himself, it didn't change the horribly vulnerable position he was in, and from which he didn't dare running away by fear of angering the hunter. With another customer, the pureblood knew better than take such a risk to begin with –although in some cases… --, but with Zero it was hard to behave like with any other man, and the temptation to run knowing he might not be punished as harshly was high.

Regardless of a slave's background or prior experience or anything else, they all went through extremely harsh training upon arrival at the 'house', and through constant reinforcement of it in all sorts of punishments over the subsequent years. There was no way that the pureblood could give in to the urge to run away, regardless of how much his heart would like to make him think Zero might not react as badly to it as another inevitably would. _You do not run from a customer. You __**do not**__, under any circumstances, refuse anything they want._

_Even if it whatever it was that they wanted of you were to shatter your very soul._

Luckily, the present situation was still quite far from such extremes, but the pureblood was dreadfully afraid it would escalate now that the hunter was not only aroused, but that he was that way while he had the pureblood practically naked and spread over his legs. Tearing off that little black thong would only take a mere second.

Even with such fears on his mind –or perhaps precisely because of them— Kaname's resolve to finish tending to the gashes on the hunter's chest remained. In part it was because he was afraid that once the wound was no longer the focus there would be nothing else but their position and the imminent consequences of it. But for a larger part it was because he realized that he did feel strongly about doing whatever he could to lessen the pain of the hunter's wounds, regardless of what may be about to happen to him despite that. Not long ago, he would have felt angry at himself for such a thought, but by now… he was far too ensnared in this man's web to be able to rebel against it, whatever his reason may tell him.

But that didn't mean that Kaname wasn't shaking with complete certainty of his imminent doom, as he went on and finished licking every last bit of the three gashes and cleaning the area surrounding them. He'd lavished such care on the wound already that he couldn't possibly continue without it becoming obvious that by now he was just desperately trying to gain time before having to face whatever was coming afterwards.

Zero was divided between the pleasant tingling warmth that continued to slowly push back the pain of the wounds, and the mix of guilt and embarrassment at the fact that his arousal still refused to go down no matter what –but then, considering that Kaname was still sitting right atop it, accidentally rubbing against it whenever he had to shift, it was hard to blame it. Zero could tell that the pureblood was obviously uncomfortable and trying to stay as still as he could, but even just his weight and body temperature pressing there were terribly tempting. The fact that Kaname was practically naked but for that tiny piece of black fabric certainly didn't help either.

Zero knew that his own face was pretty red too, but still he couldn't help marveling at the attractive flush adorning the pureblood's graceful cheeks. It was unthinkable that someone could go through so much horror and still have enough of a measure of innocence within themselves to automatically blush so adorably and so regularly. It was something the hunter found absolutely endearing in Kaname. Even if right now Zero was also quite ashamed for causing the poor thing's embarrassment.

He would have felt a thousand times more ashamed if he knew just _how_ Kaname perceived all of it, and how, far from merely being embarrassed and naturally apprehensive at the situation as Zero assumed Kaname was, the pureblood was actually close to panic due to his certainty he had that the hunter might very well be about to rape him any time now.

Zero's life may be far from perfect, but he'd been loved and cared for, and had never lived through anything even remotely similar to the horrors the pureblood experienced on a daily basis. The young hunter couldn't even begin to fathom the dark hopelessness of the thoughts currently haunting the brunet's mind.

And Kaname's situation was even more complicated now than it had been until he met Zero.  
Because before, if he found himself in such a position he would simply know he had to brace himself for yet one more inevitable rape to try and survive through... but now he found himself torn between his instinctual panic at the idea of losing Zero –or at least, of losing the gentle Zero that Kaname didn't believe could be real, and which he assumed would lose as the inevitable consequence of such a rape, since the hunter would have no reason to go on playing the game of gentleness after dropping the mask— and a new feeling which the pureblood had absolutely _**no idea**_ how to deal with.

_  
Desire, burning within him each time they shifted and rubbed against each other. _

_Lust, building in the pit of his stomach and making his heart feel about to burst within his chest from how utterly conflicted he was.  
_

For a brief moment, near panic and intense desire warred a struggle within the pureblood's lithe body, tearing at him with painfully contradictory urges and needs.

There was a foolish part of him, reckless and desperate, teetering on the verge of completely giving up and focusing on a single last moment before utter destruction. That part of him wanted Zero to take him right now, whatever the consequences may be. But the simple idea of such a thing was so terrifying on same time that the pureblood couldn't even begin forming the image in his mind without feeling that surge of panic suddenly taking over everything, both mind and body.

Kaname finally snapped out of it when he realized he was starting to tremble more and more, and so he took the only way out he could possibly see, by doing the one thing that he knew how to do and that he hoped might help.

He slid off the hunter's lap quickly and dropped to his knees on the ground between Zero's feet, nimble –albeit still shaking— fingers hurrying to unzip the man's pants…

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_[tbc]_

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_Sorry that not that much action happened after all, it was mostly them angsting and the changes etc. ^^;  
But hey, you can already guess from the pants unzipping and all that there's inevitably some form of lemony_ _activities in the next chapter. XD *lol*_

_And slowly but surely, we've been moving towards a bit of a roller coaster sooner or later. ;)_

_This one definitely broke the record for past CoB chapters, length-wise. XD; *lol*  
_

_The title for this chapter is, as always, a chunk of a song by H.I.M._ _:D  
I picked once more a chunk of lyric from "It's all tears", which is pretty much the main theme for this fic. X3 *loves that song for CoB*_

_Picking H.I.M. song chunks to use as chapter titles for CoB is so much fun. XD And inevitably makes me all full of moe/fangirling. XD;  
(With lyrics like "rip out the wings of a butterfly", how can anyone resist? XD XD I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks it's perfect for Ichiou x Kaname, with Kaname as the fragile butterfly and Ichiou providing the ripping/innocence loss…  
And all of that "drown in my love" from "It's all tears", as well as other wonderful things from so many of their songs are just perfect for Zero x Kaname~~ X3 *always gets so fangirly at the songs while writing* X3)_

_And a random note on the rose petals for baths: Zero must have either bought dehydrated ones or vacuum packed ones (*LOL* XD) or something … either that or he'll be in for a surprise when he finally opens it to try, as any normal ones would wilt pretty fast, and so they would have dried if he didn't use them soon. XD; (He's too busy and hasn't tried the ones he got yet.)  
At the 'house', they probably replace them regularly since so many people come every day and it goes by fast.  
But of course, let's not let this unappealing reality bother such pretty bath details. XD  
Sombreuil roses do exist by the way, and are quite lovely. :D_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	20. Love keeps sweet talking to despair

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 20 – "Love keeps sweet-talking to despair."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Another horrible delay since the last chapter, sorry! D:_

_Ramblings on the chapter lengths etc. in the footnotes. XD;_

_As usual, so sorry for my chronic delay in replying to the reviews. ^^; (I have chapters and chapters of reviews to catch up on, sorry!)  
But also as usual, I **love** reading what you all think of the different things in the chapter! :D  
So thank you so much to all the lovely people leaving their encouragements and kind words!! It really motivates me so much to write more~ X3 *hearts*  
_

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Before, if Kaname found himself in such a position he would simply know he had to brace himself for yet one more inevitable rape to try and survive through... but now he found himself torn between his instinctual panic at the idea of losing Zero –or at least, of losing the gentle Zero that Kaname didn't believe could be real, and which he assumed he would lose immediately if Zero raped him, since the hunter would have no reason to go on playing the game of gentleness after dropping the mask— and a new feeling which the pureblood had absolutely _**no idea**_ how to deal with.

_Desire, burning within him each time they shifted and rubbed against each other. _

_Lust, building in the pit of his stomach and making his heart feel about to burst within his chest from how utterly conflicted he was._

For a brief moment, near panic and intense desire warred a struggle within the pureblood's lithe body, tearing at him with painfully contradictory urges and needs.

There was a foolish part of him, reckless and desperate, teetering on the verge of completely giving up and focusing on a single last moment just before utter destruction. That part of him wanted Zero to just go ahead and take him right now, gentle or rough, and whatever the consequences may be. But the simple idea of such a thing and its consequences were so terrifying that the pureblood couldn't even begin forming the image in his mind without feeling that surge of panic suddenly taking over everything, both mind and body.

Kaname finally snapped out of it when he realized he was starting to tremble more and more, and so he took the only way out he could possibly see, by doing the one thing that he knew how to do and that he hoped might help.

He slid off the hunter's lap quickly and dropped to his knees on the ground between Zero's feet, nimble –albeit still shaking— fingers hurrying to unzip the man's pants…

.

Zero's straining arousal practically popped out of its restraints of cloth the moment Kaname slid down the zipper and tugged at the waistband of the hunter's underwear. It stood at attention, the tip flushed from how needy it was after the exquisite torture that those long minutes with the pureblood on his lap had been for Zero. And the sight of Kaname on his knees on the ground, his face so close to the hunter's engorged member, only made things even worse – Zero hardened even more, the flush on his own face deepening yet a little, giving him a more feverish look than before.

The hunter was aware of how scared the pureblood had looked a moment ago, and was inevitably worried that Kaname might be doing this out of obligation or because of some misplaced idea about his duties as a slave. But with how aroused Zero was now and how much his body terribly felt the need for this release after all the exhaustion and stress of the hunt earlier, his attempts to stop the pureblood boiled down to a half-hearted "You don't have to do this if you don't want to…"

Zero meant what he said, but he still did sound more than a little unconvincing, something he kicked himself inwardly for.  
And whether because Kaname truly wanted to, or because he thought the hunter didn't sound serious about stopping, the brunet insisted, "… I do want to though…", in a quick whisper before engulfing the hunter's hardness with his mouth.  
Deliciously skilled lips wrapped around Zero's flesh and initiated a slow and mind-blowing combination of extremely effective movements of tongue and lips that had the hunter gripping the cushions within seconds, teeth clenched to try and not scream from how good the pureblood's mouth felt on him.

And in a way, Kaname was saying the truth. He _did_ want this, to touch the hunter, to give him pleasure, to feel his approval, anything that might make him feel like Zero _truly_ thought well of him, even if only during those minutes where his arousal was buried deep inside the pureblood's warm mouth. Kaname practically lived for the silver-haired man's praise by now, and feeling it expressed in a way that he could believe to be genuine without second thoughts, even if that lasted only a few moments, was something he desperately craved.

The dream he'd been living with Zero was too good to be true, in Kaname's eyes. But moans of pleasure held no lies, and a man's seed shooting out was also something that couldn't possibly be faked.  
Some may think he was doing it for the wrong reasons, but if those were the only things he had that he could believe, then so be it. He'd never been given much of a choice –with the life he'd lived until now, he could hardly be blamed for being unable to believe Zero's kind words.

A part of the pureblood desperately hoped also that maybe, just maybe, if he managed to be particularly excellent at pleasuring the hunter, then perhaps Zero would continue this game a little longer, and postpone the inevitable time when he'd get bored and destroy him by putting an end to it.  
Kaname knew that waiting even longer would only cause the fall to be even more painful, as he seemed to grow more addicted to this man with each second that passed, but he couldn't help it. He constantly erred between the hope it would last longer, and a certain fatalism telling him that perhaps it would be better to end it all already, and have no more painful illusions.

_If I bit him now, would he get angry and finally put an end to it all at last?_

He wasn't thinking of biting because of how tempting that area of Zero's body was, so engorged with blood –although it _was_ tempting, even if he didn't have to strength to bite deep enough to draw blood—, but simply because it would cause a momentary pain and earn the man's anger. But he didn't have the nerve to do it, neither to destroy by his own hands this illusion of happiness he needed more than air itself, nor to do something that would hurt Zero, especially now.

So instead, he bobbed his head up and down, pumping the man into an escalating spiral of delight, and took hold of Zero's hands gently, guiding them to let go of the cushions and grip instead the vampire's own chocolate brown locks.  
It was a feeling Kaname was used to, someone holding his head while he did this, and it was a horrifying one due to years of people brutalizing him… But it was also something he knew the customers liked doing, and so he wanted to give Zero the full experience, whether or not it made things more frightening for himself.

The first time he'd given Zero a blowjob, the hunter had held his hair too, but he'd been more or less gentle, his hands being there more to keep a hold on something amidst the ocean of pleasure, than to tug at the hair and direct the act. And Zero had released him when he felt he might tug too hard.

This time, though, Kaname was holding Zero's hands in place, making embarrassed eye contact for a second while letting the hunter's fingers tangle into his dark hair, letting Zero know he could do as he pleased to change the speed or the depth of the movements.

The hunter grasped the message quite well, fingers digging into the brunet's wavy hair, relishing in the sensation of being able to affect the rhythm of the other's movements as his pleasure built. It gave him far more control over the blowjob and yet another thing to take his mind out of the residual pain of the wound, even if most of it had been replaced by the odd but pleasant tingling caused by Kaname's saliva.

Zero was still feeling exhausted and a bit shaken though, and his control wasn't very good –which resulted in him inadvertently being rougher than he otherwise would, accidentally yanking the brunet's hair as the locks got caught between his fingers, and ramming himself into Kaname's throat harder and faster than he would dare do to him normally.  
He didn't want to hurt the pureblood in the least, but his body was seeming to take over under the influence of the pleasure and the exhaustion, and each time he accidentally slipped too far or too fast, he tensed in worry that he might have been too rough, but Kaname simply continued, showing no sight of discomfort or choking, nor any need for an interruption.

Deep inside, Kaname was inevitably scared –Zero was controlling things even more than he'd expected, and that reminded him more of his usual daily experiences, but then again… in a way that was sort of what he'd wanted after all. Not to be reminded of such things, but to hand over the control to Zero, both as a gift because he genuinely wanted to make him happy, and because he hoped that by giving him this release this way, it might be enough for the night and Zero might not go further, either due to being too tired and satisfied for the time being, or for any other reasons.  
Anything was a good method to try and avoid getting any closer to the moment where absolutely everything would run out of control and inevitably shatter. So the instinctive fear the pureblood felt when Zero gripped his head tighter and angled it to better thrust all the way in, was a small price to pay.

Whatever gag reflex Kaname still had over the years was long gone via the brutal training of the 'house', so all the pureblood had to do was allow the hunter to thrust deep into him without letting his throat lock up, while he continued his enticing ministrations with his tongue and hands.

It didn't help that throughout the whole day, Kaname had been having that frightening sensation that imminent danger was on its way.  
It had grown so present that he almost felt sick to his stomach from it during the afternoon, but afterwards it had slowly subsided as the evening approached, much to his surprise considering that the opening hours of the house were the time where he was most likely to get badly hurt depending on what customers came in. Maybe precisely _because_ it seemed so contradictory, the odd feeling fading away around that time didn't reassure him in the least, and he still feared that something might happen later.  
It was in part why he was extra edgy and worried about the whole situation with Zero pulling him onto his lap earlier.  
The nervousness, and focusing on what terrible things might happen anytime now made that it didn't occur to Kaname to wonder around what time Zero might have been wounded and whether there was a link between his hunches about danger and the days the hunter was out in missions. Having lived so many of the important years of his development away from other purebloods made that Kaname didn't automatically make the connections between his instinctive reactions and things he didn't fully understand, such as the way his feelings for the hunter made that body was getting more and more attuned to Zero's wellbeing ever since the first time the hunter had given him blood.

The sense of danger he'd been feeling earlier wasn't about a danger to himself, but about Zero getting wounded in the mission; although Kaname had no way to know that and didn't expect that even so drugged and isolated from everything he might be able to sense things happening so far away, simply through the blood.

But the pureblood's fears or even his assumption that he might still be at danger didn't diminish his urge to pleasure Zero, and so the delicate lips –now glistening with moisture, enticingly flushed and swollen by the hard flesh roughly thrusting into them— continued to work on the hunter's arousal to push Zero closer and closer to the edge of a blissful release.

The hunter was utterly lost in the moment. He was initially hesitant due to worrying for Kaname, but the pureblood was far too skilled at what he was doing, and Zero was far too tired and feeling far too good to think straight. Past the initial worry and when the brunet didn't look in much discomfort –sometimes, Kaname was too good of an actor for his own good— the pleasure build up too high for Zero to focus much on anything else beyond fleeting thoughts.

One of those fleeting thoughts was a quite horrifying one though. Thinking back on the missions and on the despicable slavery that the current society dished out on the vampires –a thought that inevitably crossed Zero's head due to the obvious reason why Kaname was so skilled and experienced— Zero's mind wandered to the gun hidden beneath the jacket etc. nearby on the sofa.

He'd _'saved'_ that vampire girl from this horror with it, at her demand…

The thought of pulling the gun out, of the barrel of it pressed to the side of the head of the pureblood kneeling at his feet, and Kaname's eyes closing forever as the bullet came out with its loud deflagration echoing in the silent room… It horrified Zero to the core and he groaned in self-disgust, horrified that he could even imagine it.

Kaname's gaze quickly met his, wondering what was wrong right the moment he felt the hunter soften in his mouth. Zero's eyes met his back with a feverishly guilty look, but to the hunter's awe the brunet only smiled warmly –more with his eyes than with his mouth since the latter was perhaps too occupied for that at the moment— and caressed him further, pulling him away from whatever disturbing thoughts he was having and putting even more effort and skill into it if it was possible, soon succeeding to make Zero more than unable to feel anything but the delightful moment at hand.

The hunter's hands were still gripping the pureblood's hair tightly, but there was no doubt who as controlling the pace now. Kaname drove the man nearly out of his mind in delight, with his lips, his tongue, his throat, fingers, everything.

Zero could only look down at him and marvel. The hunter's lips were parted to let out his ragged breath, clenching his teeth from time to time to not moan too embarrassingly loud whenever Kaname did this or that thing with his tongue or the tips of those nimble fingers that danced along the base of the hunter's shaft and over the orbs hanging beneath.

Sometimes Zero wondered how it was even possible for it to simply _fit_. The pureblood's mouth was so small compared to his own, the graceful lips so delicate and evoking images of wanton sensuality just as easily as they summoned ones of complete innocence—at least, before they became flushed with exertion and seductively swollen as the brunet worked his breathtaking abilities on the other's body. After that, they looked distinctly less innocent, but even more enticing.

The arousal slipping in and out of those lips as the brunet bobbed his head seemed almost too big to fit there… much less in _a different place_ of the pureblood's body, that inevitably came to Zero's mind, causing him to feel the heat pooling in his groin rise one notch higher, returning to the point it was at before his mind slipped to darker waters, and making him harden yet a little bit more than before, if such a thing was possible.

It revulsed Zero to imagine that countless men regularly forced those sensual lips, not to mention the rest of the pureblood's body. It wasn't a revulsion aimed at Kaname, of course, but at the men hurting him.  
Although luckily at the moment that infuriating thought was more and more difficult to focus on, the hunter's normal thought process shattered to pieces with the intense pleasure that was building within him with each of the pureblood's skillful movements.

The way Kaname's tongue danced along the underside of Zero's arousal as the brunet's lips slid up and down, pumping the hunter into an irresistibly exotic rhythm of lust and passion… The way Kaname's garnet eyes flickered to the hunter's face and back down, concentrating on his task but wanting to make sure all that he was doing was indeed having the desired effect… The way Kaname's lips puckered as he let the hunter's flesh slide almost completely out of his mouth before sliding it back in to suck on the tip teasingly, cleaning it of its salty fluids and returning to his ministrations with just as much intensity… The way the brunet's every little gesture was a perfect combination of skill and mastery with a pinch of playfulness that would be borderline touching on something close to arrogance if it wasn't so subtle and charming…

Slowly but certainly it all undid Zero more and more to the point where his legs were actually trembling on each side of the pureblood's shoulders, the pleasure having reached a level that was too high to go on contained within the silver haired man's body.

Zero's lips parted in a silent scream of pleasure as he felt the orgasm build up and about to explode out into the pureblood's willing mouth… and then, that silent scream turned into a shocked groan when the sudden spike of heat was interrupted. Kaname's thumb was strategically placed to block the release, and a coquettish look of amused sensuality flickered on his face before his flushed lips diligently set back to work at heightening even more the already extreme levels of pleasure the hunter was already feeling.

This time, Zero's scream wasn't silent.

The hunter's toes curled in delight, but it was almost more than he could bear, mind and body sending contradictory signals and both assuring him that if this feast of the senses went on any longer, he might explode or die from too much pleasure, or both at once. It didn't matter that he would normally have been aware that people don't really die from such a thing. Right at that moment it felt like it was quite possible, although Zero was feeling so good he wasn't sure if he'd have minded.

But even the most exquisite torture can only last so long, and soon the hunter was almost begging for his release, much to the vampire's surprise –Kaname was rather used to people _beating_ him if he didn't give them what they wanted on the spot, not to anyone asking him anything nicely.

"_Oh sh- …Now, please now!! Kaname, now, nownoooowww… nggh!!"_

Zero didn't even know it was possible to feel so much pleasure at once, and his grip on the pureblood's hair had become unwittingly rougher, no longer quite conscious that he was tugging at Kaname's hair in a somewhat painful manner. But by now, the vampire had no doubts that Zero did so simply because he was so far out at the very edge of his climax, and not because the man meant to hurt him, and so he wasn't really afraid anymore when Zero's fingers clenched even harder in his hair.

At long last, the pureblood finally relented. But as he did so, he did something new that took the hunter by complete surprise: the moment Kaname released the pressure on Zero's arousal, his fingers slid down lower between the man's legs, and for a moment Zero didn't know what to expect, afraid of something that seemed unthinkable for a slave to do.

But Kaname didn't slide anywhere as far down as Zero had momentarily worried he might. Instead, the pureblood increased the rhythm of the bobbing motions of his head on same time that his fingertips –now placed on a precise spot at the junction of Zero's legs and at mid-distance between the hunter's orbs and his opening—pressed up against the skin in a skillful motion, slightly rotating his fingers into an exotic massage in sync with the movements of his mouth on the hunter's arousal...

Zero's mind became blank with pleasure.

The hunter was too far gone into an ocean of bliss to even comprehend what Kaname was doing exactly, or to know that the reason why it felt so spectacularly good was because the way the brunet was massaging the surface of his perineum, even though it was far from the opening, directly lead to stimulating the hunter's prostate… and the pureblood's knowing touches stimulated it on same time that he pumped Zero's arousal into his sultry mouth, amplifying tenfold the pleasure shooting through the young man's body, while still remaining safely a good distance away from his entrance, as the last thing Kaname wanted was to convey the wrong impression to the hunter.

Even staying far away, Kaname was dreadfully afraid that Zero might get angry that he was acting so forward.  
Kaname may tell himself that Zero was unlikely to lash out at him at such a moment since he technically hadn't done anything bad per se, but the deeply ingrained memory of years of other people beating him each time he showed initiative in anything were hard to put aside.

With any other customer, he would _never_ have dared to do what he did without being directly ordered to. Not just because taking initiative was a no-no for a slave, but far more because he would be in a world of pain if the customer mistook his intentions and thought he meant to reach farther down and touch them in a forbidden area.  
Or, just as bad, if the customer _knew_ the vampire wasn't going to slide that far down, but still felt embarrassed by the idea of hands anywhere below the sac, and decided to accuse him of having broken a taboo anyway, whether the slave was guilty or not.

One of the greatest prohibitions for slaves was sexual dominance. Even the slightest show of anything being remotely linked to a more dominant behavior was certain to earn them the most terrible punishments, and it was a rule that was enforced ruthlessly.

It was the case for all slaves regardless of gender, but obvious anatomical differences made the directive especially important for male slaves.

Such behavior was allowed exclusively in situations in which the owners had vampires having intercourse with each other, either for the visual pleasure of the human spectators in private parties where such things happened, or for whatever other reasons, such as the few breeding attempts that had been made by various places but that were for the most part discontinued due to various reasons leading to failure.

But in a situation where the sexual contact happened directly between a human –hunter or not—and a vampire, it was absolutely and completely forbidden for the vampire to display any signs of having the ability to be dominant in any way, physical or not.

The vampires were considered to be mere beasts at worst, and living sex toys at best. No one wanted to envision that such a creature might be able to turn on their masters in bed –the mere sight of a vampire even simply having an erection was utterly unforgivable in the eyes of the hunters, because of the implications that it could have.

And so the humans went through great lengths to ensure that they wouldn't have to lay their eyes on something they deemed so vile.  
A large part of the slaves' initial training and much of the subsequent reinforcement lessons –read: abuse— by the handlers and owners covered that, and was mentally scarring enough that no slave ever forgot how important that one rule was.

It was in fact traumatic and brutal enough that a large number of the victims were left unable to get it up even if they had _wanted_ to. And even the ones who could if they tried, were too conditioned to having to block the body's automatic reactions and would for the most part have to make a conscious effort to be able to get erect after a while.

Short of castration –which some places practiced as well but which was mostly futile on higher ranks due to the nature of vampire healing making everything grow back eventually— the training and the constant additional abuse were the most effective methods to ensure no vampire could even fantasize on turning the tables and attempting to penetrate anyone.  
It would technically not be completely impossible if the slave managed to get an erection without letting the customer see, and was dealing with someone distracted enough that they could make a move before being brutally stopped, but it would have been nothing short of suicide, as the perpetrator would be put to death for such a complete transgression of so many rules.

Considering how many of the slaves were skilled enough to nearly make their customers blank out from pleasure the way Kaname was doing to Zero, the owners viewed the constant abuse and lessons as an absolute necessity, to ensure that the idea of how brutal punishment in general could be would be permanently etched in their captives' minds and that no one would dare taking advantage in any way of a human's moment of distraction. The vampires were for the most part too broken to have any fight left in them, and so no slave would ever dare to break a rule this important.  
Similarly, the idea that they'd be punished horrifically was so deeply ingrained that if the handlers had wanted, they could have left the doors of the rooms open, and yet pretty much no one would dare to step outside without permission, knowing that the recapture would be inevitable and that even just being wrongfully accused of an attempted escape by stepping out in the corridor would earn them more punishment that they could possibly bear.

And so, with how violent the customers and handlers alike were even when the vampires were innocent, much less when they really did do something that displeased them, it wasn't surprising at all that Kaname would never have taken the risk to touch anyone on any place they might disapprove of.

Not to mention that with any other customers, he would have had no intentions to give them additional pleasure in the first place anyway. He would stick to what bare minimum he could get away with without getting in trouble, and absolutely only if they directed him to do something more –or beat him for not doing enough— would he bother trying harder.

The pureblood was so deeply focused on enhancing the hunter's pleasure while still staying as far as he possibly could from the dangerous taboo area, that for once he actually timed his movements wrong around the time the other orgasmed.  
Normally, skill and experience would have made Kaname almost innately sense when he had to adjust his rhythm so that the seed shot right into the back of his throat, or at least remained somewhere within the confines of his mouth and didn't make a mess. But when it came to Zero the pureblood was quite far out of the things he was used to and of whatever he could call a safe ground. Especially when he was trying new things that he understood and knew how to make work more in theory than due to having practiced them as much as his other techniques, and that he was afraid might backfire if the other thought he was too forward…

All in all Kaname could only realize he'd timed his last movements slightly wrong right when the white warmth shot out of Zero's arousal as it was still halfway between thrusting in and out of the pureblood's mouth, not leaving him enough time to close his mouth over the tip in time to try and keep the mess somewhat contained.

The onslaught of pleasure was such that Zero screamed when he released his seed hard into the pureblood's mouth, sliding out as he did and partially splattering it onto Kaname's flushed face as well.

There was a moment of mental void, during which Kaname froze in place and where for Zero the pleasure was just too considerable to allow him to think straight even after he'd just climaxed, and so the hunter could do nothing but focus on the delight of the strong shudders running through his body in the aftermath.

But after that instant, as if he was regaining his senses in a sudden wave and was only now hit by the image in front of him, the hunter finally took in the full sight of the pureblood still on his knees, the milky release dripping and splattered all over his flushed lips and face, droplets of it even clinging to those beautiful long lashes. Kaname had one eye closed, either to prevent the thick liquid from running into it, or because it _had_ shot right into it as it hit his face –most likely the second, seeing from the way he was squeezing the eye shut with some pain. There was seed all over his face, some of it sticking to his hair, more of it on his lips, dripping down his chin and onto his chest.

For a second, Zero could only stare with his mouth agape, lost in a powerful mix of sensations. Mostly torn between the guilt he knew he should be feeling and the intense possessiveness close to elation that he got from seeing Kaname looking so utterly _his,_ at his feet, covered in his seed, marked by him and pretty much offered for him.

Once his initial reaction –and the unexpectedly sudden surge of possessiveness and renewed desire at the sight— was overcome, Zero broke out of the daze and made a movement to reach for the brunet, but Kaname erupted in apologies before the hunter ever had the time to say anything.

The pureblood was bowing his head and speaking rapidly, apparently expecting his 'customer' to be furious. Regardless of how articulate Kaname could be when Zero gently coaxed him out of his shell a little, in a moment of panic the pureblood quickly lost his bearings due to all that he'd suffered over the years.  
The rush of apologies was such that Zero could barely understand him in between the pureblood's frantic movements to wipe his face with his fingers. It was only when Kaname attempted to lick his trembling fingers clean that Zero realized what he was saying, and why. The hunter stopped him quickly, gentle hands rushing to grasp the pureblood's shaking ones and to prevent him from cleaning off the spilled seed with his mouth.

"Kaname, Kaname, wait! Was that why you were so worried…?! You… you _**don't**_ have to swallow anything you don't want to!"

That was certainly embarrassing to voice aloud, no doubt about that, but it had to be said. The hunter had no idea why the brunet was in such a frenzy over it, but the least he could do is try and reassuring him out of it. He held Kaname's wrists reassuringly but firmly, to stop him from attempting to continue collecting the seed on his face to lick it.

"I… But I… I have to… If I don't, you… you…" The reply died on the brunet's lips, turning into an odd whisper by the end. He was shaking, his gaze lost on the ground and not daring to meet the hunter's.

"Shh, shh, you _don't_ have to, I'm telling you. I, uhm, don't mind at all if you don't swallow it all. Okay?" Zero hurried the words out, fighting the ridiculous blush threatening to spread over his cheeks as he explained what he minded or not, and caressed the pureblood's head, pushing aside the unruly brown locks falling over his eyes, and trying to put some order in the mess his fingers had made of the brunet's silky hair, mussed attractively even though it clung to his face in areas where loose strands had gotten soiled by the splatters of the hunter's release.

The gentleness of the gesture might have been what finally got through to the pureblood, and Kaname raised his eyes hesitantly, meeting the hunter's with an embarrassed look, still trying to subdue the instinctive trembling that had seized his body.

"You're not angry…"

The pureblood was so surprised that the words came out paradoxically sounding almost matter-of-factly, in his complete awe. It was a statement rather than a question, something he'd just _had_ to voice aloud to feel it was real, because it seemed so impossible otherwise.

"Why would I be angry at you? It was absolutely mind blowing!" Zero was still shaking from the intensity of his release and he almost couldn't believe it was possible to feel that good and not have died and gone off to another world or something of the such.

As it was always the case when something seemed too good to be true, Kaname hesitated for a bit longer, his gaze hurriedly scanning the silver haired man's face, seeing only gentleness there but still not quite able to believe it when he didn't see any signs of anger on his features. _Far too many people were far too good at hiding it and then striking you later once you least expected and when it most hurt._

But even with all those inevitable fears, it was easy to see that it wasn't the case right now, and Zero's words were indeed sincere. Feeling as if the bubble of sudden panic he'd been stuck in a moment ago had burst and was slowly emptying, Kaname let his tense shoulders sag a little, the strung nerves letting go a little bit and making the shaking in his body a little more visible now that the tension was bleeding out.

"I…" Kaname started then interrupted himself, nervously pulling a stray ringlet of moist hair out of the way and tucking it behind his ear, feeling suddenly stupid with the milky substance cooling on his face and the hunter staring at him with a concerned look in his soft amethyst eyes.

"I… people usually get angry if I spill. I can't remember a time I failed to swallow and didn't get beaten for it… so when I didn't react fast enough and it spilled out everywhere, I… I… I thought you would… I thought…" He lowered his head again, not wanting to go there, not wanting to finish that sentence and confess he'd completely believed Zero would inevitably hit him, when it happened.

By now, Zero had realized it had to be something along those lines that was scaring Kaname so much, but to hear it whispered out in such a hesitant voice that spoke volumes of the amount of abuse he'd endured over the years for such paltry reasons as spilling out instead of swallowing… it made the hunter furious against the 'house' and all of the current society, but more than all, it made him feel terribly protective of the shaking figure sagging down to a sitting position on his heels in front of him.

It was moments like those that not only reinforced in the hunter the urge he had to protect Kaname, but strengthened it even more, making it multiply tenfold until he was filled with the desperate need to snatch Kaname out of that hellish place and disappear with him somewhere far, where no one would ever find or hurt him again.

Sadly, it was an urge he knew well was impossible, and so he did what he could do, bending down and pulling Kaname closer. Strong arms wrapped around delicate shoulders to hug the vampire tightly but gently, and convey all the wishes of protection that Zero couldn't quite make true because other than by setting up a tent in front of the door to the pureblood's room and living in it, there was no way he'd ever be able to be there to protect him at all times.

_Ichiru would have laughed, really, if he'd seen what situation he was now stuck in. Had his brother not precisely warned him against feeling possessive of someone who belonged to a place like this?_ Zero clenched his teeth, countless amounts of scenarios playing in his mind as he tried to imagine any way he could possibly help Kaname without killing the brunet to free him, and he always came to the conclusion that the situation was utterly desperate.

And yet, even amidst the most desperate darkness, there was a light of hope in sweet blissful moments –Kaname burrowed into the embrace, blushing harder even than he had during the act, and shivering from unexpected happiness at the warmth and the protectiveness with which the hunter held him, making him feel almost like he wasn't so terribly tainted and lost. _Surely, if someone held him like that, it could only mean that not everything in him was worthless…no?_

Kaname let out a soft little noise in between a sigh and a sob of delight, mostly silenced by the skin of Zero's shoulder, against which his lips were pressed.  
The hunter caressed the back of the brunet's head softly, tracing soothing patterns on it and relishing in the little shivers he felt rolling under his fingertips. Finally realizing they were now both getting rather sticky, Zero suggested that maybe they should clean up.

.

It had been an innocent suggestion, and Zero had truly voiced it out of concern and out of the certainty that Kaname would be wanting to wash up soon due to what happened, but… Once the two were inside the bathtub –empty and with the shower on this time, as it was quite late and the hunter thought that might be easier than taking a bath— the whole idea of simply cleaning up in innocently companionable intimacy went quickly awry in a manner that neither of the two was expecting or planning.

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_[tbc]_

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_This chapter took forever to write, and I finally had to cut it in various chunks. First because the second half of it in its original size was still missing various scenes and was already huge even without the extra scenes… (At one point, almost 20.000 words and still missing many scenes. ^^;)  
And then I took the main chunk I'd meant to make into the core of chapter 20, and ended up having to cut again for the sake of getting it to go and flow the way I had in mind. ^^;  
So chapter 20 ended up shorter than some of the more recent chapters of CoB, but it's still longer than the older ones, and hopefully this will also mean that the next one will be posted faster than this one was. ;) With luck the next chapter might even come out next week if my Muses cooperate. *crosses fingers*_

_I'm not sure yet if I'll combine the other two chunks to make it a long chapter 21 after tweaking, or if there will be a shorter chapter 21 and then a longer chapter 22 or what. XD; Story-wise, it won't change anything, but I'm trying to give it a nice flow. (ie.: to keep you all hopefully entertained with somewhat cliffhangery chapter endings. *is shot* XD;; And also because there are some pretty important moments in the chapters ahead. :3)_

_The events of the next chapter are both good and bad for the two, I think. XD; *can't say much yet without spoiling*_

_And a note about random things in this chapter: When I talk about certain anatomical detail in fanfics, keep in mind it's fiction and some things will definitely be presented sounding a lot better in it than in reality. ;D  
(In other words: Much of it is real or mostly real, but not always absolutely everything, and so I'm not responsible if you try something later and it doesn't turns out the way you hoped. XD; *lol*  
Kaname has quite the experience, with the life he has in the fic, so, uhm, let's say he's far more skilled than normal people. XD  
In real life some of the extreme build up of pleasure thing should end up getting painful at some point, but in fanfic, not necessarily. ;) *lol*) _

_**Another little note, unrelated to the other: **  
Please don't judge Zero too harshly for his certainty that it's impossible to save Kaname. ;)  
He's grown up as a 'good boy', and believes so many of the things the Association told him, such as all high-level vampires being accounted for, and so on. He isn't sure anymore exactly what it true and what is propaganda, but he also doesn't knows situations like Shizuka exist (the association claims no pureblood exists free anywhere, so the population won't be afraid), or that such a thing could even be possible. Ichiru is more the law-breaker of the family. *lol*  
Zero is only now discovering that there's so much more than what the Association claims to be 'right and wrong', and the change started due to his reluctance to hurt Kaname, making Zero think more and more that society's way of seeing things is wrong.  
He's still at the stage where he's not thinking of openly rebelling against the world and throwing his life away to the wind (especially since it would also possibly have repercussions for Ichiru and Yagari), but of whether there's a legal or more-or-less-legal way to help Kaname (killing him would be illegal since it's destroying the 'house' property, but it's not as bad since he could pay them back for the cost.  
Everything wouldn't be so terrible for them if Kaname was a slave for sale, but since he's not, and since kidnapping him and running away to the wasteland and getting captured sooner or later is not an option, Zero is having trouble seeing any hope. ^^/ But that doesn't means he'd like to kill Kaname or anything, the idea of it is horrible for him too. ^^;)_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._

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	21. Scorching the blood in my vampire heart

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 21 – "Scorching the blood in my vampire heart."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.**_

_Sorry, it's two weeks later than when I had meant to post it! T-T  
Things are being really crazy busy lately, and it just kept being delayed. T-T_

_But, uhm, at least it's a bit earlier than the previous recent chapters. XD;_

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His senses had always been more attuned than that of other fellow vampires. Even from his office, he could hear well the sound of screaming and the gunfire in the distance. He'd know ahead of time that it would be the case, as his new allies had warned him of where their armies were headed, but he'd taken a bit longer than planned to finish getting ready to leave.  
He was almost done here, however, and was in no risk of getting caught before he made his escape. He was finishing to destroy all the papers that were not absolutely necessary for himself, and storing in a small briefcase the ones he found he might still have use for in the future, as political leverage in case his hunter allies ever had the foolish thought of turning against him. He had enough to make the entire Hunter Association fall, if necessary. But of course, it was something he would use as leverage, not to be actually made public other than in last recourse, to strike back in case they betrayed him first, as most of the proof he possessed implicated the Vampire Council as well – and by extension, himself— in a more or less direct manner.

The smell of the burning papers and old ink coming from the fireplace mingled strangely with the acrid smoke of burning wood and flesh that was starting to waft in through the open windows.

The wind was blowing the stench of the war into the building.

Some of the others might not yet have noticed until now just how close the hunter army was to their doorstep, but they had messengers constantly running from a side of the front to the other, as well as bats and other information-carriers, and so they'd all know soon enough.  
Never as soon as him, though. He always made sure he had the edge over the others, even among the council members. They were a democratic institution in theory, but they had _never_ been equals, ever.

They may all be level B's in the council, but there were level B's and _level B's_, and he clearly was completely different from the majority of the other council members.

He had always been above others, in part because of his birth, the long lineage of the Ichijous being the product of the very best and most powerful blood of each generation of his family… and more recently, in part thanks to the strongest pure blood, Kuran blood, which he'd been given the chance to taste at last.

_And what a heady nectar it was. One could easily become forever addicted to such delight._

The one he'd gotten to try was already magnificent, but it couldn't possibly compare to the even younger and fresher one which he'd desired for so many years, but which had been kept safely away from his reach. _Well, until now, that is._ Soon enough, it would no longer be the case. And soon enough, nothing would be able to protect the boy from him or stop him from having a taste of his blood and so much more.  
Rido's blood was incomparable to that of anyone Ichiou had tasted until then, but the older pureblood was still imperfect. He was a Kuran, but not completely perfect, as his mismatched eyes and unstable personality indicated.  
The child, on the other hand… Kaname… he was the product of the purest bloodline of all, undiluted from the source until the very latest generation, and perfected to a level that could be called art. Kept safe and protected from anyone, virgin from all touches, in his body or in his blood. Not for much longer… As soon he was done with the papers here, Ichiou would get leave for Kuran manor, to collect that which was kept safe from him for far too long. Not only the boy, but also the girl his associate spoke of, that the Kurans had hidden so carefully. Rido may have her first, if he so wished; Ichiou was more interested in the boy he'd long coveted and been unable to touch.

The door slammed open, interrupting the vampire elder's thoughts, and someone staggered in, reeking on gunpowder and inferior blood. The man coughed, then fell to his knees, stretching an arm out.

"Asato… help me…"

_Shiki. _

"My old friend, what foolish things have you done? You need not go outside by yourself. If you'd sent someone instead, you'd have avoided finding yourself in such a predicament."

The tone was lightly admonishing but remained cold, and the detached look in his eyes certainly didn't match the situation. Shiki didn't seem to pick up on that, too busy choking and gasping for air.

"I.. I… didn't go to the front. I come from my niece's house. The whole area is overrun."

Ichiou watched with distaste as Shiki the elder bleed profusely on his expensive Persian carpet. Not that he'd be able to keep the carpet after he left the building anyway, but he'd spent so many hours in this office through his life… he'd decorated it with a minutiae of care and dedication, each little thing full of memories and history. This carpet for example, had been with him for near 250 years, and he liked it very much. It didn't matter that the moment he left, the building might burn down or be sacked by the enemy, he didn't like his carpet being defaced while he was still standing in his office. It was _still_ his office until he stepped out of it for the last time. He scowled lightly at the other vampire.

"Well, I'm very much done sorting through my papers, and am leaving now. I'd advise you to do the same."

An advice spoken for no reason, as the other couldn't possibly heed it, they both knew well. Shiki's wounds were far too grievous, and it was only a matter of time now. Anti-vampire weapons were as deadly as ever.  
Vampire healing or not, he would not live to see the end of this day even if he was given blood –unless of course it was from a pureblood, which was unlikely if not impossible. And he dared not ask Ichiou to take him with him, aware the other vampire would refuse to have a wounded person slowing down his escape.

"Asato… I know you have a plan. You always do. It's too late for me, but please, save my family! The girl is just a fool and her child isn't much better, but they're still the blood of my blood!! Don't let them fall in the enemy hands, I beg of you! For… for the sake… of the past… would you do… this for me…?"

Shiki was grasping the border of the desk now, standing with difficulty and focusing what energy he had left in asking that last favor. His bloody fingers left smudges on the mahogany wood and on the few crumpled papers left behind because they weren't important enough to burn down.

Ichiou gave him one last distracted glance while he finished stuffing a few small trinkets of sentimental value into his briefcase, and buttoned his coat to leave.

"I'm sorry old friend, but I have priorities, and your mad niece and her bastard son are not among them."

Ichiou stepped around the other man without sparring him a second look and walked out of the office, closing behind him the door of the place where he'd spent the longest part of his life. Shiki stared at the door, lost hopes and illusions crumbling in his eyes as Ichiou's footsteps became more distant in the hall.

_What was done was done. What needed being done. Now came the most important part of it all._

Messengers returned and news of the battle's outcome spread; with them, the tide was quick to turn. The other council-members rational worry evolved into a wild panic as the smoke of the fires and the clamor of the enemy soldiers got closer. Most were burning confidential papers and trying to organize their own escape plans. They were less efficient and less well informed than Ichiou, naturally. He exited the building walking quickly, without bothering to look back. By the time the others left, it would probably be too late.

Shiki and him had been lovers once. But it was a long time ago, when they were young and full of foolish ideas. When they had been almost as young as their own current heirs were now.  
Time had separated them more and more, despite the proximity of their positions in the council. They hadn't been together in that way in over five or six hundred years at the very least. What had been a youthful passion once had grown cold with the age, and the more it became clear that while Shiki may be cunning and ruthless himself, he was nowhere at Ichiou's level, both intellectually and physically. Tired of a lover that wasn't born of a blood powerful enough to allure him nor intelligent enough to challenge his quick mind, Ichiou had preferred to have Shiki as an useful ally and a tool in the council rather than a lover, and the other had taken whatever position he could, not intelligent enough to challenge Ichiou but too smart to miss the fact he would be crushed like a bug if he stood against him.

But Ichiou had no room for him in the new world he had to adjust to, and his one and only priority was ensuring Takuma and his own safety once the war ended.

_Whoever stood in the way might as well burn, for all he cared._

The fires of the war were but a distant memory now, and so was that brutal afternoon when Ichiou had left behind the old council building and its occupants, to fend for themselves as the hunter armies approached.

The fire that was currently reflected in the man's cold eyes was that of his cozy fireplace, in the luxurious triplex apartment he owned in one of the most refined residential districts of the hunter capital.

Fire that burned warmly and reassuringly, its reflections playing with shadows and gentle hues over the figure of his grandson, sitting a small distance away, and once more trying to discreetly peer through the escort agencies' slave catalogues. In search of what, Ichiou knew not for sure, but he was starting to feel like he'd have to look into it sometime.

The old man immersed himself back in the economics page of the newspaper in his hands, though, knowing there was no hurry.

In the eyes of the society of lies and deceit that had emerged at the end of the war, he was a respected member of the higher hierarchy of the Hunter Association. His plans might not have gone as perfectly as he'd wanted –the only failure being that Takuma was still a vampire— but at least they were in as safe of a situation as they could hope for, and had nothing to fear of the new world, unlike most of his former race, the vampires enslaved after the war.

He wasn't comfortable everyday with the way things happened, and he would definitely have liked to have a chance to doom only the purebloods and somehow save the rest of his race, but… life generally gave you choices and you had to make with what you could accomplish.  
And if he had no choice over the matter but perish with his brethren or save his own hide, he was most definitely not going to hesitate. Especially when the choice was to perish with fools that had worshipped the purebloods he so hated, or survive and thrive, with on top of it the chance to keep Takuma safe too. The boy was the only person who'd ever mattered in Ichiou's eyes, after the death of his beloved wife and after their only son, the flesh of his flesh, had foolishly betrayed their clan by choosing a life or artistic delusions in his career as an actor, rather than the meaningful existence Ichiou had offered him at the council.

But the past was the past. The future, on the other hand, was still looking pretty bright in Ichiou's eyes.

If he had to damn the rest of their race to ensure the Ichijous at least would prevail… then so be it.

--

Far away from the respectable district in which Ichiou and his grandson lived, in a bathroom adjacent to a bedroom with tired furnishings and that had seen far too much horror over the years, the one who was perhaps the very best example of anyone the old man would have wanted to 'damn', was currently enjoying a very rare moment of happiness.

Rarely did Kaname ever feel safe enough to come out of his shell a little more, but at the present moment, the gentleness and the intense protectiveness with which Zero had held him tightly a moment earlier had touched him so deeply that he almost felt giddy from joy. However much he may still be inevitably scared that the moment might not last and that he might be just as rapidly swept back into the horror of every night at the 'house', the moment at hand was definitely too peaceful to focus on that fear.

After Zero's kind words and gentle reassurances, Kaname was feeling far safer now than earlier in the night, and he truly glowed, his already naturally ethereal beauty enhanced so much more by the shy smiles on his luscious lips, still flushed and attractively swollen from his exertions in pleasuring the hunter earlier.

The brunet's innocent delight in the current moment was such that for once even the deeply ingrained fear that had still showed intermittently on his face earlier had now mostly disappeared, save for on the usual moments of hesitancy as they entered the bathroom or if they accidentally brushed against each other. Instead, the emotions that flickered on Kaname's delicate features all spoke of his shy happiness at being in the hunter's company, and his eagerness to please him and enjoy the moment to its fullest.

The pureblood was already irresistible the rest of the time, both because of his looks and because the pheromones his body automatically released whether he wanted it to or not; but when he looked so unexpectedly _innocent_, his beauty managed to be countless times more remarkable even. One would not have thought someone so beautiful could possibly exist in nature, and Zero was taken aback by the sight each time that Kaname turned to him with those adorable smiles and the endearing blush that colored his cheeks anew whenever the brunet and him talked.

To make matters worse, the relative lack of pain currently coming from Zero's wound, allied to the fact that his spectacular climax earlier had momentarily cleared up part of the foggy feeling of exhaustion and feverishness from the hunter's body… and had replaced it instead with a peaceful bliss that for the time being allowed him to focus a little too much on something _other_ than his earlier worries about being tired and having to get back home to go to sleep quickly.  
In other words, it left him with quite a bit of room to focus instead on the sensual brunet in front of him and on the renewed surge of desire he'd felt when he saw him earlier, so beautifully marked as his by the seed splattered over his face, flushed lips parted, at his knees and practically offered for him.

Zero had tried to ignore his urges and to instead give his whole attention to their innocent talk as they got in the bathroom and as Kaname gathered the bath products and all, but… that feeling wasn't abating in the least. If anything, the lust was only rising to even worse levels as Zero soaped himself up and watched Kaname washing as well.

By now, Zero had already seen Kaname naked several times, but it was so very rare to have the combination of them being in the bathtub together and Kaname looking happy and unguarded, both at the same time. Usually, Kaname looked as if Zero was about to jump him, which always made the hunter feel guilty and keep his distances. Today, the pureblood wasn't displaying that barely concealed panic, and naturally, the guilt that normally held Zero at bay was not there to shield him from the full force of the lust.

The pureblood's eyes were now shut tightly with an adorable look of concentration as he washed his hair and tried to avoid getting any of the lather in his eyes.  
That sight in itself was certainly somewhat innocent, but there was nothing quite completely innocent about the overall picture of wanton sensuality the water painted as it sluiced down that perfect body.  
And there was no denying the utterly sensual way Kaname's skin glistened under the soapy suds and the warm shower spraying over his sculptural body, rivulets of it running down his chest, stomach, sides, legs.

A slight movement of those finely chiseled hips was all needed to have Zero's eyes glued to them.

It was as if the water itself couldn't resist caressing that demigod of perfection, worshipping his unmatched beauty, drop after drop licking his skin in passionate strokes that were both absolutely innocent and yet nearly obscene in Zero's eyes, because of the tantalizing urges that clamored within him in response, at the sight of the whole scene.  
The water emphasized even more each and every single spot on the brunet's body, awakening wave after wave of concupiscent images in the hunter's mind, who wished it were his tongue and other parts of his body exploring the pureblood's silky skin, instead of the water from the shower.

Kaname might not even have known just how radiant he currently looked, but it simply was so.

Zero's eyes were riveted to the curves on the pureblood's body, even more so when Kaname turned around to expose his front to the shower, which in turn left his back wide open to the man.  
Zero's gaze slid down the line of the brunet's slender and very lightly muscled body, admiring the dip of his spine then the beautiful, curving swell of his rear, where the hunter's attention stayed for a good moment, fascinated by the way the droplets of water ran down the delicate skin of those twin mounds, and the way the muscles flexed softly in response to the brunet's movements as he washed up the rest of his body as well.  
It was impossible for Zero to not automatically imagine how it would feel if that subtle clenching of the pureblood's inner muscles was to be happening with them both enlaced in bed, and his own flesh buried deep within the delicious brunet's quivering body.  
Would Kaname shudder uncontrollably in his arms, cutely trying to repress his moans, or would he be the more vocal type as pleasure escalated…? The thought sent a renewed spike of heat to the volcano already pooling in Zero's groin, the mind image making it all seem so much more real, as if he could almost concretely imagine already how deliciously tight and hot the brunet vampire's sheath would feel when he claimed him. Somehow, Zero was sure it would be even more amazing than anything his imagination could possibly conjure.

Zero had been the one to suggest that they wash themselves and not each other as they sometimes did. Oficially, so that their shower would be over faster since it was late… although in truth it had been because he'd been wary of spooking the pureblood and breaking the lovely moment if they washed each other and he went too far.  
He'd been the one to tell Kaname to just go ahead and take his time washing up and not worry thinking he had to wash him or anything, something the pureblood seemed to assume was his duty whenever Zero bathed. But by now the hunter was quite unable to heed his own advice, too busy with the contemplation of the beautiful being that so unexpectedly took the risk to turn his back on him.

Zero's gaze finally managed to tear itself from his fascinated examination of the area that had so strongly caught his interest, only to wander further down to the graceful paleness of the brunet's inner thighs, marred only by his taming brand, a restraining tattoo placed on his inner left thigh –all slaves wore one, on a place or another of their body— and then finally all the way down to his delicate heels, and what he could see of the rest of his slender feet and toes from there.  
The pureblood had perfectly cared-for toenails, that from the look of it must be as well-manicured as the nails on his hands, although Zero doubted it was done for any purpose other than being aesthetically pleasing to the customers. It's not as if the 'house' cared for Kaname's wellbeing beyond his usefulness for them. But even then, it was a part of who Kaname was, and the hunter couldn't help but take in each and every single one of those details and devour them with his eyes, trying to benefit from the fact that since Kaname had his back to him, the pureblood wouldn't be scared by the lust in his eyes as long as the hunter kept his aura more or less under control.

The way the brunet got on his tiptoes for a quick moment, perhaps to get under the shower at a better angle as he brushed some suds from his face before resuming his hair washing, was particularly enticing. The shifting of position made the movement translate beautifully into the rest of the pureblood's body, making the cleft parting the two halves of his rear to appear even more inviting in Zero's eyes. The heat pooling anew in the hunter's groin spiked yet a little higher with each of Kaname's little movements.

Even beyond the physical beauty, it was a rare moment of seeing the pureblood letting his guard partially down, and the glimpse the hunter got of that unguarded Kaname was even more tempting than usual.

Zero's mind played tricks on him, inevitably wondering if Kaname was _truly_ just innocently trusting him not to do something, or if perhaps the brunet was purposefully tempting and inviting him… Of course, no matter how much he told himself that it should be the former, his body clamored for him to hope for the latter instead.

As for the unaware subject of such ideas, the position he had put himself in during the blowjob had taken its toll on the brunet 's already painful knees, and Kaname was having a bit of trouble keeping his balance as he washed. His legs trembled slightly, the soreness just slightly soothed by the warm water.  
Soon, he had to lean against the wall with one hand to steady himself, and had only the other one left for washing his hair.

The brunet's difficulties were obvious, by now. Zero shoved to the back of his mind the rampant erotic mind images that were running wild on the forefront for a moment, and drew closer to Kaname's back, whispering by his ear "Allow me…" before taking over the washing, massaging better the sweet scented lather of shampoo into the pureblood's hair.

Kaname slightly flinched in surprise at first, but couldn't help shuddering pleasantly when the hunter's breath tickled his ear. He tried to relax into Zero's touch, and his scalp was very sensitive… the hunter's massage was blissfully soothing, and so soon the brunet was melting eagerly against Zero's fingers as the man's movements became less and less washing and more and more caress, first on his head only, then on his shoulders and arms as the hunter moved down and forgot about his own advice, taking upon himself to wash more than just the pureblood's hair.  
Kaname unexpectedly leaned into the contact even as it grew bolder, unsure of what he was doing but simply feeling safe for now and not wanting the moment to ever end.

On an unconscious level, he realized Zero was caressing him more than he was really washing him, but by then, it wasn't uncommon for them to exchange caresses, always walking the thin line between soothing and pleasant and the escalating sensuality that normally frightened the hesitant pureblood.  
At the present moment, however, even though his heart was beating increasingly faster with each of the hunter's advances, Kaname was surprised to find he wasn't panicking just yet. Truth to be said, he was still a little in a daze, both from the awe of the kind and reassuring moment they'd shared earlier, and from the recent days of Zero touching him gently but never pushing it too far.

Maybe it was just wishful thinking, and he should have been more worried than he was, but for some odd reason, at the present moment Kaname didn't feel as threatened as he normally did, which in itself was a very surprising discovery for him. With so much on his mind, it was understandable if the brunet was so distracted by the unusual feelings that he didn't notice the one moment when things tilted over the invisible edge of something neither of them had dared to approach before.

It was all unplanned, unexpected, too fast for either of them to think straight before they realized things were going so much farther than they ever had gone until then.

They'd been exchanging caresses more and more often with each meeting, but it had never escalated so much. All of a sudden, Kaname found himself encased within the hunter's arms, Zero's strong lean body pressed exotically behind him, the hunter's hands no longer merely caressing as he washed him, but instead openly giving into the temptation to explore his body farther and farther down, until…

The thought process had gone completely chaotic inside the pureblood's mind when the hunter's fingers slid down his side in a sensual caress, over his hip and then farther, wrapping themselves _around_ him.

A wave of heat seemed to wash over Kaname's whole body, matching the flush that took over his face all the way to the roots of his hair. His lips parted very suddenly, in shock, but no sound came out. It was as if his whole body didn't know how to react and was short-circuiting, his brain frozen and torn between panic and dumbfounded disbelief at what was happening.

Unsure whether he was about to scream or not –and whether it was from pleasure or fear or both together—, Kaname's hand instinctively flew to cover his mouth, and he was lost between the urge to press himself more fully against the body of the man behind him, or try and break the contact before things escalated even farther as he knew they quickly would… But unfortunately, he also knew that making _any,_ even the slightest, attempt to stop the hunter was something utterly forbidden for him. Pushing away a customer meant the slave wasn't properly broken in, and resulted in inevitable complaints to the 'house'and horrific punishment for the slave… Partial 'retraining' being one of the worst parts of it.  
Attempting to refuse himself to any customer was inacceptable and impossible. He was at the complete mercy of Zero, whatever the man may decide to do to him.

'_Whether you want this or not, you have no right to ever refuse your body to anyone. '_

'_You belong to whoever crosses the threshold of that room door, for as long as they pay us for your body. Never forget __**what**__ you are…'_

And as Kaname felt the hunter's hand close more decidedly around his shaft, he knew he _did_ want Zero touching him, he very much did, but… he was also completely terrified, and shaking more and more hard, torn between his wishes, his fears, and the brutal commands and directives of the ones who had put him where he was now. The owner of the 'house', the handlers, everybody whose orders had ever left their mark on his scarred mind, and whose voices he could practically still hear echoing against the walls and making his hands feel clammy and cold even under the pleasant warmth of the shower, which he could no longer feel, lost in an old panic that would never leave him…

'_You have no right to pull away from a customer. The word __**'no'**__ is forbidden to those of your kind. If you ever so much as __**dare**__ consider uttering that word to a customer, expect the punishment for it to be a hundred times more painful than anything that customer may have done to you.'_

The pureblood whimpered softly against his own fingers still covering his mouth, the sound mostly drowned by the spraying of the shower over them, and by the heat of the moment. Zero took it for a small moan and failed to notice the brunet's distress. He kissed the pureblood's delicate earlobe sensually, a hand sliding up his pale torso slick with water, and the other hand caressing Kaname more earnestly, initiating a pumping motion.

Kaname thought he might faint. He'd never felt anything like that before. His toes and fingers were curling under the onslaught of sensation, hands pressing so hard against his face from wanting to clench into a fist to try and cope with it. If not for the anti-vampire drugs weakening his body so much, his nails might have dug into his skin from the effort to keep his own body under control.

'_You live only to serve the humans. Your body is not your own. Never forget what you are and what you are left alive for. Never forget that you exist for their pleasure, never for your own. Never forget that if you fail at providing that pleasure, then you are worthless to us, and we will make sure to __**correct**__ the problem.'_

Kaname squeezed his eyes hard, tears blurring his vision. His head was swimming with pleasure so intense that he could barely breathe, but every second that passed reminded him of how impossible a positive outcome was. His ribcage heaved more raggedly as the hunter's free hand slid over a nipple, gentle fingers teasing it into a hardened state. Kaname's knees felt like butter melting in the sun. He'd have fallen already if not for Zero's arm around his chest, supporting him. A soft whimper escaped his lips, a sort of a tortured little plea turning into a half-groan of pleasure by the end. Tears were now freely rolling down his face, but with the water it was impossible to tell.

'_Don't ever think any human would ever view you as anything other than the whore you are. A slave, a sex toy that can breathe, and nothing more than that.  
Don't you __**dare**__ to ever think you are anything more than just that. Don't __**dare**__ to ever imagine you could be above anyone or anything else, or that you could ever have a right to claim pleasure for yourself.  
Your body doesn't belong to you. It belongs to anyone who is willing to pay to claim you, and if you ever dare to think you could possibly be anything other than a passive receiving object, we will have to remind you of the error of your ways in a manner that you won't forget regardless of how long the lifespan of your filthy species may be.'_

Kaname pressed the back of his head against the hunter's shoulder, his face still out of Zero's sight, muffling his own sobs with his hands and trying to focus whatever he could muster of his crumbling will into not letting his body lose itself in the pleasure and display the arousal it was feeling.

Every word spoken by his tormentors during the brutal training he'd endured years earlier was still seared clearly in his mind, as well as the words of every single handler that came after to reinforce that idea over the years. The horrifying memory of their teachings ate at him, tearing at the fabric of reality as he saw it and his own perceptions of worth and right or wrong. _Unforgivable… what I am… my very birth was a sin, I couldn't possibly expect to be given any pleasure, much less… much less… _

Much less to dare to allow himself to display something that would indicate that his body still had any instincts that may be anything _other_ than submissive. Such as hardening while a hunter or any human could see him. They had made it very clear, what would happen if he disobeyed, if his body took over and broke such important rules. He knew better than expect any mercy from people who had subjected him and so many others to such horrors that would still be plaguing his nightmares many more years from now.

Complete panic was seizing Kaname at the idea that the pleasure the hunter was giving him was such that he might be unable to go on holding back, and accidentally go erect.

If there was one thing that was as unforgivable as it could get, it would be that happening right there and then, in full sight of a customer. Gentle and exceptional as this particular customer may be, the rules were the rules. _He might not be so gentle if he sees this happen!_  
Hunters were what they were, and so were vampires, their slaves at the complete mercy of all those rules. None of this was going to change just because Kiryuu-sama had hugged him before they went into the bathroom.  
However much he may have wanted to cling to an impossible dream, Kaname was too certain of that to have any doubts on the matter.

He wasn't sure what Zero would _do_ to him if he broke the rule, but he was certain that something horrible would happen. First off, it would certainly earn him about as much punishment from the handlers as refusing himself to a customer or trying to push them off him. But he feared Zero's reaction and his disapproval or, much worse, his disgust, far more than he could fear any abuse from the handlers.  
And for all Kaname knew, Zero might even be touching him as a test –it didn't even cross the pureblood's mind that the hunter might actually want to make him aroused. The way he'd been raised and brutalized made the idea of such a thing being wanted, from a vampire, impossible in the brunet's eyes.  
And furthermore, Kaname was used to people who knew very clearly the rules he was bound by, and it never even occurred to him either that Zero might simply have had no knowledge of that particular rule, having never rented slaves or visited the 'houses' before meeting him.

There were no things such as_ natural bodily reflexes_ or any of the such, for the 'houses'. At least, no reflexes that were left unpunished… Getting aroused and displaying it in an active way was almost as unforgivable as being thirsty and openly demanding blood would have been.

The voice in his mind repeated the words again, as brutal as it was in his memory, the feel of the steel whip still burning on his skin even years later.

'_Slaves are to be passive. Always receiving, open and offered at all times, pliant, yielding, legs and lips parted for whoever may feel like claiming them, never showing any signs of disobedience or hardness of any type. The mere sight of a vampire's erection of all things, is an abomination that would disgust to the very core any human, and it __**will**__ be immediately punished accordingly. You will not escape punishment, ever.'_

Horrible words spoken during one of many dreadful conditioning sessions, heavy of terribly dark menaces and that had left an unforgettable impression in the minds of all the slaves, whether they'd received their training at a 'house' or were broken by a private instructor first, for the service of an individual master.

Private slave or whore in the brothels, the brutality with which they had learned the new society's rules after the war was the same all around. No slave ever forgot their training, ingrained in their body and mind so deeply that some of them were not even able to get erect if they'd _wanted_ to try to during the meager hours of rest they had during the day, and during which they could hope to have a short respite for themselves.  
Kaname's current problem was the opposite; he wasn't unable to get it up, he was instead desperately afraid of his concentration breaking and his body betraying him, and of it hardening between the hunter's fingers and utterly disgusting Zero forever on.

'_The mere sight of a vampire's erection was an abomination that would disgust to the very core any human…'_

_Any human… yes, that meant even Kiryuu-sama…_

…_and even Kiryuu-sama would punish him accordingly, for such an unforgivable slight, of course, how could he not…?_

…_After all, it was such an abomination… __**He**__ was such an abomination. His body was such an object of revulsion for everybody, and not good for anything other than being the receiving end of…_

…_of……_

Kaname choked on a sob, his face burning from shame and arousal together, despair and unbelievable hopes warring with each other. His mind was swimming from a shockingly contradictory mix of both pleasure and the haze of horror that the memories of his training had brought closer to the forefront along with their usual load of self-loathing and disgust.  
He suddenly realized he felt the hunter's arousal pressed against the curve of his rear, the tip of it nudging his cleft with each of their movements. He hadn't even understood exactly what it was before, too lost in the terror within his own mind, and not expecting it from Zero. He was too shaken and hadn't understood just how far it had all gone, until this moment, when it all seemed to click together. Kaname's heart was pounding in his chest, and he finally realized with both complete horror and a strange wave of heat what was inevitably about to happen to him anytime now.

With one hand, Zero was rolling the brunet's nipples softly under his fingertips, going from one to the other, arousing them further into puckered nubs while with the other hand he continued his ministrations to Kaname's flesh lower down his body. Zero was completely lost in the moment and in the delight of lavishing gentle attentions on the pureblood and finally touching his body in ways he'd so long desired… So much that it was only when he pressed further forward and tilted the brunet's head back to kiss Kaname's tightly shut eyelids that he finally realized the pureblood was crying hard.

The hunter froze, completely shocked, suddenly noticing all the signs he'd been missing before, both because he'd been so lost in the moment and because Kaname had his back to him and was trying to hide his panic so much.

The pureblood's fingers were still tightly pressed over his lips, and he was trying hard to restrain his shivering, not pulling away from the hunter's arms because he didn't dare to, but holding desperately to his sanity, apparently quite in the belief that it might shatter anytime soon depending on the hunter's next movements. His eyes were squeezed shut, a look of terror twisting his delicate features.

_No, no, no, no, please no, please I beg you, don't, please, please don't…_ Words Kaname couldn't possibly say aloud, and that were repeating in a string of fear and desperation in his mind, as he just let the other do as he pleased to him, clinging to the mostly gone hope that the final damage might not be as bad as he was almost certain it would be.

Still frozen in place by the unexpected sight, Zero risked a terribly uncertain smile --that desperately wanted itself reassuring in case Kaname opened his eyes and saw it--, before he whispered a question.

"Kaname...? Why are you covering your mouth?"

The pureblood's hands were pressed over his lips so hard that his knuckles were white.

And with that single question, what was still left in place shattered completely since Kaname opened tearful eyes and lifted his fingers to confess in a trembling voice that was so low it was barely audible and almost sounded like that of a frightened child instead, "I... I was scared…"  
Not knowing what to do and assuming he was forced to say the truth, the brunet continued, trembling as he spoke, and unwittingly driving the nail deeper into the proverbial coffin…

"... I …I was afraid I might scream. I didn't want to anger you though, so... so...I covered my mouth… I was… trying …trying so much… not to…"

The brunet's tears broke apart whatever he was trying to say, and meanwhile, cold realization washed over Zero – the trembling flesh his fingers were wrapped around had never hardened one bit, regardless of how long he'd been stroking it.  
In the heat of it, he'd thought the way the pureblood pressed himself against him and trembled under his touch was because Kaname had been enjoying what he'd been doing, and that he _would_ grow hard anytime soon, or that maybe such things were a bit slower for vampires and that all was fine, but… what if he'd been wrong? What if he'd been forcing himself on him, what if Kaname merely _endured_ his touch, feeling obligated…?

_What if it had been exactly how it was with everybody else who came in here and forced themselves on the poor thing?_

Zero was utterly horrified at the idea of what he might have been doing to the broken brunet. _But he didn't say anything!! He didn't show any signs that he didn't want this, he let me…_ The voice of the hunter's conscience was quick to interrupt and crush the paltry arguments. _Well, duh, he was pretty much forced to live with the idea he had no right to say 'no' to anyone, how did you not think this might happen?! _

Zero may know this much about slaves, but his knowledge of things didn't go very far into some of the darker details. He'd never gone to the 'houses' until meeting Kaname, and he hadn't grown up with someone that owned a slave or had any closeness to any, so he ignored completely how far things went in their training. He had no idea how heavily the notion of "_passive/submissive_ _**only**_" was enforced in their minds, nor how brutally said notion was introduced in their training and subsequent reinforcement sessions.

He had no idea that if Kaname wasn't hard, it wasn't because he fully, _completely_ didn't want this, but because it was so terribly forbidden for him that the mere thought of accidentally getting an erection in the hunter's company terrified him beyond belief and ruined any chance he might have to enjoy the man's touch. Aside from the fact that the brunet was even more terrified now of Zero raping him any time, even if the more relaxed moment they'd shared earlier made that he hadn't immediately assumed that as quickly as he usually did, and had instead spent a while first focusing his fear on the possibility of accidentally hardening under the hunter's touches, and on the question of whether Zero would react brutally if he did something wrong or displayed physically the pleasure he was feeling.

Horrified as Kaname may have been, he did '_want'_ it, in a way. Or more exactly, he wanted the _'idea' _of them touching each other and of how things would be in an ideal world. A world where Zero could touch him and he could merely give himself to the pleasure of that touch, without being so terribly afraid of the consequences and of what every single of his actions might cause.  
A world where the closeness between them was true and every breath he drew didn't remind him of how little time left there was, and how sooner or later it would all break apart and the hunter would reveal his true nature. A world where he wasn't so certain that the gentleness Zero displayed was but a mask that would disappear when the hunter finally claimed him. In short, a world where Zero's touches meant only the gentle pleasure spreading in waves through his body, and not an omen of imminent destruction.

_But this was not a world of dreams. _

Kaname deeply believed that in _this_ world, such beautiful things were impossible.

And as such, he trembled softly in the hunter's arms, wondering what he'd done wrong to cause the sudden interruption, and whether he'd be punished for whatever it was that he'd done.

Mortified, Zero had dropped his hand quickly after his mistaken assumption that the pureblood wasn't enjoying his touch at all. The hunter was still more or less frozen in place, his arms around Kaname loosely supporting him, the spray of the shower pounding against them relentlessly. Slowly, he pulled the pureblood around gently and hugged him in an awkward manner, partially angling them sideways in an attempt to avoid poking Kaname any longer with his arousal, even though it was rapidly going limp from the shock of thinking he'd forced the pureblood. _Kaname didn't want this, so it was best not to remind him of… of what…_ Of what he'd been about to do to him a moment ago, and which was now filling the hunter with intense remorse.

Shifting them around to shield the brunet from the spray of the shower, Zero held him close, caressing Kaname's head reassuringly, his fingers tracing soothing little circles on the back of his head and neck, the way he'd noticed the pureblood liked.  
Guilt was practically oozing out of the hunter's pores as he waited for the pureblood's ragged breathing and the trembling that shook his slender body to quiet down a little bit.

Still caressing the dark-haired head, Zero waited until he was sure Kaname could stand by himself, then whispered painfully a _'sorry' _into his ear before letting go and stepping out of the bathtub. He grabbed a towel and disappeared quickly into the bedroom to dry up and get dressed to leave.

Kaname's face fell as he considered the unexpected apology and whatever it might imply. And yet, even as the panic was still racing through his veins, he already desperately missed the feeling of the man's arms around him, like a moth enraptured by the flame that kept burning him more and more painfully, but that never ceased to fascinate him.

It was so unexpected for the vampire that someone would apologize to him for anything, much less for what was supposed to be anyone's "right" in the status quo of the current society.  
Kaname stared at the door the hunter had retreated through, unsure of what to think or if he still had enough forces to withstand whatever might lay ahead tonight.

_Was it a 'sorry' said preemptively because Kiryuu-sama would be raping him any time now…? But why would he be sorry or even bother apologizing, if it was the case…?_

_Unless… unless the apology was meant as a farewell, a way to say that there was something so utterly wrong with him that the hunter wouldn't even be willing to go through with it…?_

The way Zero was so different from other hunters made it so much harder for Kaname to guess, but the sheer pain that had hung in the air between them when the hunter whispered that word and left, spoke volumes of the thing Kaname feared maybe even more than the idea of his silver-haired protector raping him…

At that point, Kaname knew he was more afraid of Zero leaving now and never returning, than of Zero staying and raping him right that very same night.

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_[tbc]_

_

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_

_Things are getting hotter, little bit by little bit. XD;_

_Even though it was mostly depressing and tragic for Kaname because of his past ruining what could have been such a precious moment, and because of the resulting misunderstanding, there's a little positive point not to be forgotten in the middle… He **did** want Zero touching him, after all. XD; Terribly afraid as he may be. X3_

_I'm not sure when exactly the next chapter will be posted because things are crazy busy right now, but hopefully it won't take as long as it's been taking. ^^; *crosses fingers*_

_The title of the chapter comes from "Vampire Heart", (by HIM as usual), btw. :D_

_And lastly, if anyone needs a memory refresher of the Takuma & Ichiou situation, I think we last saw them back in chapter 9. XD;; CoB is crazy long. XD; *lol*  
I had an even longer scene about them and some more people, but if I just kept tweaking the chapter it would take another week or so before posting, so… that scene will have to wait another time. (Besides, I'm sure we are all more interested in what's going on with Zero x Kaname. ;D *lol*)_

_--_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	22. I’m not going to lose you tonight

_**Cradle of Blood – chapter 22 – "I'm not going to lose you tonight."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_  
__**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.  
**_

_Ahh, finally this chapter is here! D:  
So sorry for the huge delay with this chapter, I've been full of deadlines and stuff lately, and had family over for a while too, which was lovely but resulted in having even less little time left for writing. But now I'm here. XD;_

_Also, so sorry for my usual horrible delay in catching up with review replies. :X I'm not sure when it will be possible to reply, but __**I do appreciate immensely all your kind reviews**__, and they __**motivate me SO MUCH**__ to sit down and update. :DD So thank you~~! *hearts*  
Especially the lovely lengthy ones, so please don't apologize when you do one! XD It's absolutely lovely! XD *lol*_

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By the time the pureblood mustered the resolve to come out of the bathroom and face his fears, Zero was already dry and wearing his pants and shoes already. His battle gear was gathered in an organized little pile, strapped together and ready to go, and the hunter was in the process of starting to rewrap his wounded chest with fresh bandages he'd taken from the first aid supplies he'd been carrying on himself during the hunt, as was standard for hunters on missions, and of which he'd already used about half of it when he did the field dressing for the wound.

Kaname lingered by the entry of the bathroom, still wrapped in his towel, and watched the hunter in silence for a few moments, shuddering a little as his damp hair stuck to the sides of his neck and dripped down his still heated skin.  
Unsure what to say or do, he settled for awkwardly waiting for a command that never came. His eyes wandered over the room, taking in the hunting gear and the shirt and jacket thrown over the back of the chair next to the standing hunter. From the clothes and gear as well as from Zero's hurried body language, there was no doubt that the man was intent on leaving anytime now.

Regardless of the inevitable fear of what Zero himself might do to him if he stuck around for very long, Kaname always loathed the moment when the hunter would leave, each time. But now everything seemed so much more ominous than usually, because instead of it being the usual departure, this night was such a distinct break from normalcy.  
Not just because of what had happened in the shower, and which still had Kaname's knees shaking in apprehension mixed with intense arousal and pleasure, but because the little _'sorry'_ that Zero had whispered into his ear felt more like a parting salute than anything else.

Much as it may contradict all that Kaname had expected and feared from Zero until now, the pureblood wasn't sure whether the hunter would ever return, if he let him go now.

And so, when Zero's hand reached for the bloodied shirt over the back of the chair, Kaname's eyes widened and he took a hesitant step forward, a different fear finally winning over his original one.

"Ah… are you leaving, Kiryuu-sama…?"

Zero smiled at him with an embarrassed look, but it was obvious that his mood from earlier in the shower was completely dead. "Uhm, yeah… I thought I might as well not be here right now…"

The ominous feeling Kaname had been struggling with intensified tenfold, pushing the pureblood to take a course of action he might otherwise not have dared to in the present situation. He inched forward some more, closing the distance between them even though he didn't dare touch the other yet, and he whispered a trembling plead. "Please… Kiryuu-sama, please… don't leave…"

The brunet's face burned, not from the pride he had already long lost over the years, but because he was so utterly certain that he would be hit for his insolence in asking something like that. Handlers and customers alike had long taught him that actually asking for anything –demand or request, it was inevitable either way— was a sure way of getting a beating regardless of how justified your need was. Vampires were there to service others' needs, not the other way around, never.  
And if it was a matter of asking for something non-justified, then the punishment could only be even worse. Kaname was so certain Zero would hit him that he could practically feel the blow as if it was already stinging on his face.

With any other person, he knew better than dare voice such a wish, whether in a request format or even as a plead. _But Kiryuu-sama was so different… so different, and yet… yet…_

To Kaname's surprise, the slap or the punch that he'd been bracing himself for never came, and instead, Zero's fingers caressed the brunet's cheek softly, pulling some of the brown tresses out of the way, tucking them behind the delicate shell of his ear, before sliding down to his chin in a fluid caress that sent butterflies fluttering through the pureblood's stomach.  
Zero cupped the brunet's chin in his hand, tilting his head back gently, to make the pureblood look at him. As he'd guessed from the sound of Kaname's voice, the vampire's eyes were shining with renewed moisture that he couldn't conceal at the moment, and his face had that irresistibly adorable yet so painfully sad look and flushed cheeks that the hunter had grown so used to seeing on him, and that made him want to hold Kaname tight and shoo away all his worries.

But that was also precisely why he wanted to leave right now. _Because he'd become one of Kaname's worries. Because he couldn't trust himself to stay here and not do something stupid that would make the pureblood lose even more of whatever trust he might have in him._  
_Not that Kaname hadn't always been afraid of him to begin with, but…_ Zero still felt like he'd broken something, earlier in the bathtub. He'd crossed a line he'd promised himself he wouldn't cross without Kaname's permission. He'd assumed the pureblood wanted it too, but… he'd assumed wrong, clearly. The least he could do was remove himself from Kaname's sight for now, before he let himself get carried away and caused anymore damage.

And yet, it seemed that the pureblood was the one who didn't want to let him go, contrary to all of Zero's –once more, in classical hunter fashion due to his upbringing and life, quite black-or-white— logic. Kaname's apprehensive yet needy-looking expression puzzled the hunter.

"Kaname, why don't you want me to leave…?" _After what I almost did to you in the shower, can you still think I'm any better than the others?_

The question was so direct that it pierced through the pureblood's hesitations and shot straight into the fear of losing Zero, making Kaname reply quite truthfully for once.

"Because I'm so afraid… that if you leave, you might never return…"

The 'truth' that Kaname believed in and didn't dare to speak of, which was the great unspoken void between them, gaped at him threatening to swallow him.  
_Don't leave, because if you do, I'm afraid when you come back you will be a different person. One who won't hesitate to make me yours by force.  
_It warred on equal terms with the fear he had that Zero might simply leave and never come back. A fear that all logic made seem ridiculous if Zero was really just playing a game with the purpose of breaking him late, but… after the farewell in the bathroom, Kaname didn't know what to believe anymore, at the moment.

But he couldn't speak of such things, of course. He believed he had to play the hunter's game to the very end, lest those words spoken in a haste shatter whatever was left of the time they still had together. _Before the game ended. Before all masks finally broke with no return. _He had to enjoy what little time was left, and do all he possibly could to prolong what little he still had with the gentle hunter who may be but an illusion, but who had soothed his shattered heart more deeply than anyone before .

A tear rolled down Kaname's face, and he chastised himself inwardly for once more not being able to keep his cool, or at least keep whatever fragments of it may be left.

Zero pulled him gently into his arms and kissed the tear away, hugging Kaname tenderly and resting his chin atop the brunet's head. He whispered against the pureblood's hair, "I thought you'd be scared of me, now… I thought you wouldn't want me around."

Kaname's fingers were gripping the hunter's shirt with single-minded desperation, and a sob escaped his lips. His breath trembled, coming off in warm puffs against the hunter's chest.

The pureblood was beyond attempting to control himself and not show how much the hunter affected him, by now. He wasn't sure he would have been able to hold this truth in even if he'd tried to anyway, and in the current situation, if showing his tears and his fears might possibly help stop the hunter from leaving, then he might as well confess it.

"I'm scared, yes… " The confession escaped his lips hurriedly, as if it was some dreadful secret, obvious as if may be. As if giving that knowledge to the other would further cement the certainty of his doom. And yet, there was a contrasting determination in his next words. "But I'm far more scared of losing you than of having you around…"

There were of course all the things he couldn't possibly say, words that he feared would destroy him and the last moments they had together if he were to confess them to Zero. But unlike in the past when he'd tried to fight the importance the hunter had for him, now he surrendered to the feeling, and uttered the words within himself, in a silent confession of all that he couldn't tell Zero.

_Even if you were to betray me, I wouldn't mind, Kiryuu-sama… Just please don't leave me alone again, please…_

He gave into the sobs now, clinging to the hunter so desperately that it was as if he feared the man might vanish in an instant if he were to let go.

Zero wrapped his arms around the brunet's heaving shoulders and held him tenderly, dropping soft butterfly kisses on his hair.

"I'm sorry, Kaname, I'm so sorry…" The hunter punctuated the words with more light kisses to the pureblood's hair.  
He may not know what thoughts were currently going through Kaname's mind, but he realized well that he was crying for so much more than what had happened in the bathroom earlier. The hunter's heart ached for him, for the tears he didn't know how to begin wiping from his eyes, because he didn't know if there was any way for him to do anything about all the _causes_ of the tears spilling down that delicate face.

But he could at least try; he might not have all the elements of the equation but what he did know already gave him enough to try and soothe the vampire's fears. And so, he whispered as reassuringly as he could, "I'm sorry I scared you in the bathroom. I swear that won't happen again…"  
He half regretted the _'I swear'_ he'd used instead of _'I promise'_. He'd wanted to give Kaname some mark of how deep his intentions ran, but stopped just short of further assuring him of it, feeling it might reduce the value of his words, on light of him already having broken a promise made to the brunet not that long ago._ If he were to break this one, would the pureblood ever forgive him…?_

Kaname's breath was hitching with his sobs, face buried against the hunter's chest, trying to avoid the wounded area, eyes burning with renewed tears.  
_How was it possible for this man's words to sound so true and heartfelt when they could only be lies?! How was it possible for anyone to lie so convincingly that Kaname felt his heart nearly split from the urge to believe the man and the pain of knowing he couldn't possibly trust his words?! And even now, a small part of him foolishly wanted the man to touch him once more, the way he did in the shower…!!_

Kaname's knees were shaking from instinctive fear –both of losing Zero _and_ of what Zero might do to him if he stayed –, as well as from a mix of a need for something he wasn't even sure he could possibly stand, and a deep anger at himself.  
Anger because he wanted to believe Zero, even when he knew well that doing so was nothing short of pure folly. He knew that something horrible would inevitably happen if Zero were to follow through with what he'd been doing in the bathtub, and yet… yet… the young pureblood's body was still tingling with desire in ways that made Kaname discover yet new meanings of the word _'shame'_.

Pulling away almost imperceptibly at first, then with more assurance once he felt the hunter's embrace slacken to allow him to move, Kaname glanced at the bandages partially wrapped around the other's chest, and tried to break out of the current subject, unsure whether it was the hunter or himself that he was attempting to distract. "The shower washed it all away, so it must be hurting again, no…? I could… I could lick the pain away again, if you'd like me to…"

He flushed a deeper shade of red as he finished the sentence, eyes still teary, afraid it might have sounded like he was offering to give the hunter a second blowjob. But Zero just smiled gently, blushing himself as well, and whispered "Yeah, I think I'd like that", before starting to unwrap his bandages again.

The second session of Kaname tending to the hunter's wounds went by a little faster than the first, and less sensually if just as awkwardly. Zero sat down on the foot of the bed, turning towards Kaname who sat next to him, and both shyly attempted to make things less difficult for each other. Kaname proceeded as thoroughly but as detachedly as he could, afraid of giving the hunter ideas –he was, after all, forced to lick all over his chest to tend to the wound, and it was hardly possible to make it completely non-sensual. Zero on the other hand, tried to get in a position that allowed Kaname to have access to the full length of the wound without having to get too close or anything. On light of the recent fiasco in the bathroom, he regretted deeply his thoughtlessness in pulling Kaname onto his lap the previous time the pureblood tended to his wound.

The hesitant shyness on both sides was such an extreme contrast with the intimacy of what had happened in the bathroom that it would have been almost comical if not for the dramatic aspect of it. Kaname self-consciously held with all he had onto the towel wrapped around his chest, covering down to the top of his thighs –not that such a small barrier could have stopped anyone, but he was intent to at least keep the more _'interesting'_ areas of his body out of sight as much as possible, to not provide unnecessary temptation— and Zero caressed the pureblood's hair with brief and light strokes as if he was tiptoeing around hot coals, afraid to even put too much weight into his touch and possibly scare the other.

Awkwardness aside, the obvious goodwill of both sides helped slowly melt part of the ice that had formed after the bath, and little by little the agitation gave way to a more relaxed mindset, even if Kaname was still jumpy whenever Zero made a sudden movement and the hunter was still visibly burning with guilt to the point that he seemed to be careful even when breathing, to try and not scare the brunet.

Kaname finished tending to the hunter's wound and helped him re-wrap it with the same clean bandages; the two lingered on the corner of the bed where they had sat, talking hesitantly of random nothings, both finding their own words utterly stupid as they uttered platitudes along the lines of how much length of bandages hunter first-aid kits usually carried and how nice and protective the texture of that gauze seemed to be. Zero was used to carry all manner of emergency supplies while in mission, and Kaname was quite used to being wounded and was greatly appreciative of good bandages, something he didn't normally have access to, so the two didn't run out of material to discuss for some time.

And then it happened naturally, neither of the two really making the decision to lay down on the bed, Zero simply not making a move to leave and Kaname not wanting to push his luck and ask that the man spend the night there, both simply leaning back on their elbows then laying down as they talked of nothing and of all, trying to find subjects of conversation and random excuses to remain longer in each other's company.  
As the two grew slightly more relaxed laying on their backs and chatting of unimportant things, the tentative intimacy that the earlier incident had shattered slowly build back up a little, although still hesitant and jumpy due to the recent fright. Kaname was still afraid of Zero leaving –or of him staying and doing something else altogether…—, and the hunter was well determined to reassure the pureblood of his intentions, and after some time they ended up rolling closer onto their sides, and finding themselves laying next to each other, face to face, babbling of random little nothings that were reassuringly unrelated to all the subjects that heavily weighted between them and that both deliberately avoided mentioning.

Zero took the initiative to caress Kaname's arm again, and when the pureblood tensed slightly but didn't appear openly as afraid of the contact as the hunter had feared he might be, Zero drew closer and risked putting an arm around the brunet again, breathing in the delicious scent of rose petals and sweet-scented soap coming from him. Their foreheads were almost touching now, and Kaname didn't know what to think –he knew he should be worried and that new attempts of approaching might mean the hunter intended to continue now what he'd interrupted in the bathtub, but… with Zero so close, his breath warm and tickling his face softly, inches away from his lips… The pureblood was finding it harder and harder to think at all, and could only lean closer, feeling the blood warming his face as he blushed again.

Zero's lips shifted almost imperceptibly forward, and Kaname's heart skipped a beat, his eyes widening slightly and his nostrils flaring in anticipation.

_Anticipation of what, he wasn't sure._

And then, for a split second the hunter's eyes slipped close and the muscles in his face momentarily slackened, as he fell asleep for a brief second just before jerking back awake, realizing finally just how terribly exhausted he was. He stared past Kaname's confused face and groaned at the hour the clock was indicating.

"I… uhm, I should go, it's really late..."

But Zero's voice faded into a whisper, the words dying on his lips when he saw the flash of pain that showed for a brief instant in the other's eyes.  
Kaname obviously didn't want him to leave, unbelievable as that may have seemed after what had happened earlier that night. A pang of renewed guilt shot straight to Zero's heart, the urge to comfort the pureblood coming full-force to the forefront, shoving back all the other less innocent ideas and images his mind inevitably offered at the sight of Kaname's luscious body propped on one elbow, his curves irresistibly tempting despite being currently covered by the towel still wrapped around his body. The pureblood was looking fixedly at his face with such adorable intensity and expectancy.

Caressing the brunet's face softly and feeling yet an additional pang of guilt when Kaname closed his sad eyes with a look of resignation but eagerly leaned into the touch anyway, Zero apologized, "I wish I could stay, but I really need to get home to sleep a bit. I'm sorry…"

Kaname shivered when the hunter's fingers slid closer to the edge of his collar as Zero tucked a lock of the chocolate-brown hairs behind the pureblood's ear. It wasn't just that he was starved for the gentle touches –it was so much more, he was craving _Zero's touch _so terribly much that he couldn't possibly put it in words.

But as it was, if Zero left now by the time he got home he'd only have a very short time to rest before having to get back up and rush to the Association, exhausted and wounded or not. He really couldn't afford to stay up all night when he was already hurt and so terribly tired. No matter how desperately he wanted to stay and try to erase what he could of the pain in those beautiful dark eyes.

The hunter got up from the bed, regret written all over his face, but before he could make a move to get his things and leave, Kaname interrupted his momentum, blurting out a most unexpected request.

"Tie me up then, Kiryuu-sama… ? Please…"

"What?!"

Zero's mouth gaped open for a second, color quickly rushing to his face as he wondered if he'd misheard what the brunet said –and in immediate reaction, an attractive blush rushed also to Kaname's face just as fast, when he saw clearly what was going through the hunter's mind: A myriad of spectacularly erotic mind images of Kaname bound to the bed, that left Zero burning and trying to convince himself that he _had_ to have misheard those words.

The pureblood was quick to clarify the matter. "…Would you mind tying me up, Kiryuu-sama…? If the problem is for you to be able to sleep here despite my presence and… despite… what we are…" The unspoken words were obvious; hunter and vampire, born enemies by nature and to all hunters a shocking thing to even just imagine sleeping in the same room. "…If you have me in shackles and wearing a gag, there's no problem, right…? I would… I would never do anything anyway, but… but with the gag, you… well, I wouldn't be able to do anything, anyway… So you'd be able to sleep peacefully and it wouldn't be… _wrong_ or anything…"

The pureblood's explanations were breaking down, the pauses in between his words growing longer and longer as whatever strength he felt his arguments may have dwindled, his confidence crumbling fast.  
But Zero's silence wasn't due to a distaste for the suggestion but to a terrible conflict between raging hormones demanding to see Kaname tied to the bed, and his compassionate nature telling him that it was wrong, terribly wrong to tie someone up just so that he could sleep there.  
Especially after the already potentially traumatic issue earlier. _But it's his idea, and if he doesn't seems to mind that, then maybe it's not really such a terrible thing, is it…? _Zero nervously wet his lips, unsure whether his thoughts made any sense or whether was he just thinking with the wrong part of his body and making up excuses to believe it was okay to tie Kaname up to the bed.

If it had been hard enough to hold a reassuringly innocent conversation while laying next to Kaname knowing that under the thin layer of terrycloth of the towel wrapped around him, the pureblood was wearing nothing, not even his usual rather diminute bondage outfit. To imagine such a thing with the pureblood tied up as well made things even more difficult. Zero swallowed dry, settling down on the bed once more, hesitation now visible on his face as a violent dispute warred between his raging hormones and his conscience. "But… wouldn't you mind spending the rest of the night that way?"

Even the obvious hesitation in the hunter's voice was so much better than disgust at the request followed by a swift exit, and so the pureblood's hope was rekindled anew. He was quick to eagerly reassure the man. "Not at all! I get… tied up a lot anyway, so … I'm, uhm… used to it." The eagerness on his face fell considerably as he mentioned the subject of experience, because the types of situations in which he was restrained on a daily basis were so much worse than whatever he was envisioning in order to reassure the hunter that he could sleep safely. But that painful reminder didn't dampen the brunet's determination in the least, and he continued on a slightly more enthusiastic tone. "I… would be fine anyway, Kiryuu-sama. And that way you would get to rest sooner and for longer than if you have to go home first, and… I won't have to put up with… with the rest of the people outside."

That was a far trickier subject. Slaves were not supposed to mention other customers, and asking anyone to stay so they'd be spared the violence of the rest of the crowd was quite obviously a no-no. Kaname could only hope the hunter wouldn't react to it the way any other person might.

They normally rarely ever spoke of the other customers interested in Kaname. Both generally tiptoed around the issue and kept an awkward silence over it, but it was a thought more and more present in Zero's mind. He hated the fact that each time he stepped out of that room, he was leaving Kaname at the mercy of whatever depravities the men waiting in line downstairs wanted to inflict on him. He knew well that each time he left early, it meant yet more additional time of suffering for the beautiful pureblood. That thought made Zero stay as long as he could each night, but inevitably he always had to leave, sooner or later. His life, family, work, were all outside the 'house', while Kaname was inevitably locked in that place.

_But maybe just tonight we can ignore it for a little…_

When Zero just nodded uncertainly and didn't object further, Kaname rushed to get the necessary items out of the drawer in the nightstand next to the bed, afraid the hunter might change his mind if he was too slow.

Within moments, the brunet was back on the bed, advancing to the middle of it on his knees before sitting back on his heels, a sturdy ball-gag in hand and a few leather restraints with metal buckles at the ends hanging over his forearm. He'd already put back on the leather shackles he normally wore on his wrists and ankles, and that had been removed for the bath. The collar with the symbol of the 'house', indicating their ownership over him, was still firmly in place around the pureblood's bruised neck.

Showing the restraints to Zero with a half-broken hopeful look that spoke of years of brutality and desperation, Kaname explained, "With this, Kiryuu-sama, you'll be able to sleep without feeling like you're doing anything… that you don't want to do as a hunter or anything…like that."

His persuasion abilities were far from being what they'd have been if he'd grown up in a normal pureblood's life, and since a visual explanation was so much more comprehensible than his hesitant words, Kaname opened his mouth to set in place the ball-gag and strapped it tightly to the back of his head, before tilting his face from side to side to demonstrate to the hunter that he was securely muzzled and completely harmless.

Then again, due to the anti-vampire drugs, Kaname most likely wouldn't have had the strength to harm Zero or even break skin if he'd tried to bite him anyway, and if he did try to harm Zero, the hunter would have been awake and in condition to exact great bodily harm any time he so wished, so both Kaname and him knew well that this was not truly the issue. If Zero never slept there it was in a way more for Kaname's protection than for his own, because of what the house would have done to the brunet if he even just tried to bite a hunter and they found out somehow.  
That and and on a deeper level it was a matter of principles and of a moral taboo; because of the fact it was inacceptable for a hunter to be asleep with a vampire roaming around nearby, rather than because of any actual real danger that Kaname might present.

But as long as Kaname _was_ restrained, Zero would be able to sleep next to him without infringing the taboo –too much, at least.  
And so, the pureblood quickly secured together the shackles on his ankles with one of the shorter leather restraints he'd brought to the bed, and then buckled a second one of them onto a D-ring on the shackle around his left wrist, before putting his arms behind his back and letting himself fall onto his side on the bed, indicating with a nod to the hunter that everything was in place: All Zero had left to do was finish attaching the same restraint to Kaname's other wrist, and then use the longer leather strap to attach the brunet's ankles and wrists together and then to one of the many metal rings that ran along the frame of the bed and that the hunter had noticed before when Kaname pulled the coverlet aside to reveal them. With that, the pureblood would be able to stay laying down on the bed with some slack between the bed frame and his tied body, but he would be effectively immobilized with his hands behind his back and his ankles tight together, so he could hardly be considered a threat in any way, even to someone asleep. Not that a drugged slave could represent a threat to begin with, but that was beside the point.

The sight of Kaname on his side on the bed, his pale skin deliciously flushed here and there in a most attractive manner, the dark leather contrasting with it distinctly and making the whole picture even more appealing, played cruel games with the hunter's control. The towel around Kaname was still holding in place, but the corner of it had flipped to the side as he laid down, and the spot where both ends of the towel parted revealed a little more of the top of Kaname's thigh, as if it was begging for Zero to pull it further and unwrap it all. Furthermore, with his ankles shackled together and his hands partially so also and already behind his back, and with those hesitant eyes darting worried looks up to the hunter's face and then back to the bed again, Kaname was absolutely irresistible, so perfect and deliciously offered for the taking.

Zero turned a deep red and then very pale, fighting a dreadful struggle with the intense urge to just pin the delicate brunet to the mattress a little further and claim his body right then and there. The voice of lust in his mind whispered unforgivable little things about how the pureblood was gagged and wouldn't even be able to cry out, outrageously suggesting that the guilt of hearing his cries in the middle of it shouldn't even be a distraction. Zero angrily shoved such unacceptable thoughts to the back of his mind –although he had to admit that even dismissing the horrible aspect of it, it was undeniable how much of a perfect picture of temptation Kaname presented offered that way on the bed— and advanced to finish strapping the brunet to the bed frame, moving almost like an automaton, his body and mind at odds about what he should do (leave as fast as he could) and what he _was_ indeed doing (tying the pureblood to the bed , much to his own shock), until he realized that for better or for worse, he'd finished securing the restraints to the bed.

Kaname was at his mercy, even more fully than before. If there was ever a test of virtue and self-control, this was it.

Zero was glad for the position he was in, with a leg drawn up a little, and which prevented Kaname from seeing the raging boner the hunter was now sporting, against his best intentions. His heart was racing, but the initial moment passed, he noticed that Kaname's one was even more agitated. The pureblood had closed his eyes to hide the fear obvious in his gaze, apparently picking up on the origin of the other's turmoil, and resigning himself to whatever horror may happen to him any time now. The instant Zero realized that, it was as if a cold wave had slammed against him, guilt and shame putting out completely the fire that lust had awakened lower down his body. It was one thing to suffer his own mind providing him with the most obscene suggestions, but it was a whole other thing to have Kaname notice this and think he was about to truly jump him.  
Zero burned with embarrassment and gingerly caressed the side of Kaname's face, wiping off the droplets of perspiration that worry had made rise to the surface of his skin, before pulling up the coverlet over the brunet's body, being careful not to further disturb the towel around him.

The pureblood opened his eyes in surprise as he felt the weight shift on the bed, then Zero switched off the lights and came back to lay next to him, covering them both and pulling Kaname closer, into a chaste and protective embrace. The fact that the pureblood was perfectly tied up meant the hunter & vampire taboo didn't apply, at least in Zero's eyes, and that meant there was no reason for them to sleep far apart, but Kaname was still surprised.

The brunet hadn't expected Zero to hold him so gently, especially after he'd been so certain that his idea had backfired horribly. He melted into the embrace with almost as much repressed delight as shy hesitancy.  
Zero's arms around his shoulders, the hunter's broad chest, everything radiated warmth and a sense of safety that, whether it was well-founded or not, were all things Kaname both craved and desperately needed on a deeply instinctual level. And while Kaname spent the first many minutes listening to the sound of his own heart thudding loudly against his ribcage in the silence of the dark room, after a while the wonderfully reassuring scent of Zero's skin allied with the soft little kisses the hunter occasionally pressed against his hair made the brunet slowly stop shivering as much and end up finally slipping into sleep, ironically before Zero did so himself.

Listening to the sound of the silence in the room, only interrupted by their own little noises or the sounds of things farther away outside of the room, Zero pondered on how unexpected life could be, and how terribly fragile and precious the life of the person in his arms was.  
Even though the rooms were perfectly soundproof, you could vaguely hear things in the corridor, or the occasional muffled sound farther away in another room, generally a scream or the noise of something hitting a wall or something, denoting the violence other customers tended to use against the slaves. The idea of those people touching Kaname that way –or any way at all, more and more— seemed increasingly inacceptable to Zero.  
Not that it had ever seemed _'acceptable'_ per se in Zero's eyes, but before it was a matter of thinking it immoral on a theoretical level, while with each day that passed it became more and more a visceral repulsion that was far more personal.

He should perhaps have asked himself once more whether it was wise to develop such possessiveness towards a vampire, and a slave bound to a brothel at that, but he'd asked himself such things far too often to no avail, and the question was as unhelpful as ever.  
Regardless of what he should or should not feel as a hunter, he was undeniably attached to this person whose hair he was gently kissing as he held him in his arms.

--

What was left of the night was far from being the most peaceful one. Zero slept a restful but often interrupted sleep, his body having lost the habit to sleep with someone in his arms since Ichiru and him had ceased to do so a few years earlier. But every time Zero woke up to regain his bearings, shift a little and fall back asleep, he found that Kaname was curled up next to him shivering, his skin cold and covered in a sheen of perspiration as the brunet was the prey of incessant nightmares.

Zero wasn't sure whether he was in part the cause of those nightmares or not, but he'd already seen that Kaname had such issues the previous times he'd watched him sleep, and so he tried as well as he could to soothe him and make his sleep less troubled, whether or not he was to blame for his restlessness.

Sleep may have claimed the pureblood, but the diverse worries plaguing his mind still made it stray towards different worrisome paths even as his body tried to rest. It continued in the form of erratic dreams of a most disquieting nature. Some were more peaceful dreams, but the majority were far from that, and involved the hunter raping him with different levels of brutality – occasionally with Kaname himself partially enjoying the act as well, against his best hopes— while other moments had the settings being completely dark and devoid of even that humiliating pleasurable element.

_What would have happened if Kiryuu-sama hadn't mysteriously stopped, back in the bathtub…?_

Kaname was still shaken by the recent events, and it was only normal that his mind would focus on them, reliving it in his sleep and coming up with a thousand different scenarios. The scent of the hunter all around him was both a blessing and a curse, soothing him in many ways but also frequently reminding him of the previous hours, making the sleeping brunet felt completely wrapped in the intriguing silver haired man's presence, something that in his dreams translated one moment into being cradled protectively, and in another being trapped without escape.

On one moment, the dream Zero was pressing Kaname down onto the bed, claiming his lips in a kiss so mind-blowing that the pureblood trembled against him like a leaf in the wind, arms wrapped around the hunter's neck, soft gasps escaping him as the man claimed him and he parted his lips to welcome the sweet invasion, surrendering utterly to the delightful onslaught of emotion and sensations, regardless that such a powerful feeling was coming from a mere kiss. His legs wrapped around the hunter's waist and he came undone, the kiss and the rest of their bodies merging into something only dreams could create.

And on the next moment, the dream turned darker. The pureblood found himself pinned over the hard edge of the bathtub, crying and begging the man, although uncertain of what he was begging for as he didn't dare to ask him to stop, terrified as he may be. Reality and dream weaved together and Zero –the nightmare version of him now— plowed the brunet's body hard and relentless, driving his arousal into him brutally enough to tear him open, unrepenting and without hesitation. Kaname begged and cried more, but all he got in response were harder thrusts slamming his already bruised body against the side of the bathtub, and Zero's laughter, cruel and distorted now. The pureblood's sobs suffocated him, the part of his consciousness that might have believed Zero wouldn't act that way not so sure of that idea anymore, something that naturally did little to reassure Kaname in his sleep.

The dream changed many times, but it inevitably returned to the same dreaded themes. Kaname found himself bound by heavy chains, Zero throwing him on the ground and pressing his head down under the heel of his boot, laughing and gloating about how much the brunet was foolish to have left himself so wide open for a hunter of all things. How everything that was happening to him now was his fault, because of how stupid he'd been to trust his natural enemy so much. And how much that mistake would now cost him.

The pureblood tossed around in bed, small droplets of sweat forming on his forehead, flushed lips straining around the gag forcefully holding them apart. What noise the gag let him make was an incoherent mix of soft little muffled whimpers of pain and fear mingled together, uttered in his sleep.  
It didn't help either that the restraints didn't leave him the chance to move much and as such, his unconscious mind automatically reacted as if he was still bound by a customer, something that happened far too often, and that fueled his nightmares all over again whenever his consciousness neared the surface enough to realize his body was still bound.

As it was often the case when he had nightmares of that nature –a sadly frequent occurrence due to the life he was made to live—, Kaname instinctively tried to draw his arms and legs closer to his body on the bed, as if the curled up position could somehow protect him, if not by avoiding the blows, then at least by appearing smaller in the irrational hope that it might make him less noticeable to those likely to feel like brutalizing him. With the way he was tied up, he couldn't really achieve much of a curled up position, but he held his arms glued to his back and pulled his legs closer to his chest, to try and occupy less space on the bed.

He woke up for a few moments repeated times, sweating cold and finding out that he'd been crying in his sleep. Every single time, he found that the hunter was still there, holding him, next to him, and to Kaname's absolute surprise, that presence that should have made him so much more scared, instead soothed him deeply, maybe because the gentle Zero holding him —illusory as he may be in Kaname's eyes— and he was a world apart from the cruel Zero from his nightmares, who pressed his face to the ground and mocked his weakness.

It wasn't the first time that Kaname had dreamed of Zero and of what he inevitably feared would be happening sooner or later, but it was worse today because it all felt so much more real. Each time the hunter in the dreams touched his skin, it was as if a live wire was connected to him, lighting him ablaze with passion and fear together, making him burn with desire, shame, pleasure, pain, fear and a terribly wistful need, so deep and so painfully bittersweet that he broke down in tears even harder.

_I want it so badly… I want you to do anything you want to me… but I'm just so desperately sure that you'll inevitably destroy me instead. _

_That what you may want to do to me is not at all what I'd like it to be…_

_I'm at the end of my rope, Kiryuu-sama. I can only last so much longer with this fear._

--

The brunet had been very tired, both because of the customers before Zero and because the emotional roller coaster during the hunter's visit had taken its toll on his already exhausted body, and so he somehow managed to sleep through the night despite the horror within his dreams.

By the time Kaname woke up completely, it was early in the morning, and he found himself tightly held by the sleeping hunter, who'd continued cradling him gently into his arms throughout the whole time they slept, until his protective warmth finally won over Kaname's fears and penetrated his dreams, making the nightmares fade away and allowing the pureblood at least some measure of restful sleep before the morning.  
Kaname understood suddenly that this was what had banished the darkness away from his sleep, but he came to the realization while still half awake, and promptly blushed fiercely, almost holding his breath by fear of awakening the man and putting an end to such a precious moment.

Now that the peacefulness of the morning and the hunter's gentle embrace lulled him into an unexpected sense of safety, he wasn't quite sure what to make of it all, not only of the events of the previous night but even of the horrible dreams that he was certain held a measure of truth or another, if anything for what was bound to happen once the hunter inevitably grew tired of the game he was playing. In Kaname's eyes, it was inevitable that the hunter would do so, sooner or later, and few things horrified him more than that idea.

But at least, it seemed that Kiryuu-sama didn't plan to break him just yet, otherwise he would never have passed the perfect chance he'd inadvertently given him.  
Kaname burrowed closer into Zero's embrace, nuzzling his chest almost out of instinct, from how touched and unsettled he was by the man's gentleness when he'd least expected it. He was past finding himself foolish or weak for needing the embrace of a man who would sooner or later destroy him— he needed Zero far too much regardless.

The nightmares of the previous night seemed like an increasingly far away thing now, and although the memory of them still made the pureblood's hands feel cold and clammy, it was difficult to focus on them much when he was surrounded by so much warmth. His mental barriers half-melting and half-shattering down, Kaname sighed contentedly against the hunter's chest, his eyes wet.  
Zero stirred slightly, tickled by the warm breath against his skin and waking up to find an adorable brunet blushing in his arms.

"Hey there…" Zero whispered softly, unable to resist bringing up his hand to caress the brunet's mussed hair, pushing the strands out of his face and marveling at how particularly cute Kaname looked with his bed-hair and that embarrassed expression on his face. Of course, the presence of the ball-gag still in place made Zero feel an immediate spike of guilt, and so he was quick to slide down the covers a bit and unclasp the restraints holding Kaname's arms behind his back. The pureblood then took over the rest, removing the gag from his face and so on.

As it turned out, Kaname's towel had come undone during the night, but Zero busied himself with other things while the pureblood stole surprised glances at him and rewrapped his nudity –not that Zero hadn't seen Kaname's body countless times already, but the two were still shy from the incident the previous night, and stepping on eggshells.

By the time Zero looked back at Kaname, the pureblood had already securely retied his towel around himself, had removed the ball-gag from his mouth, and was working on the restraint tying his ankle shackles to the bed. To Zero's shock, the delicate corners of Kaname's mouth were raw as if they'd been burned or if the skin had been torn by something, on each corner of the pureblood's lips, where the leather and the metal of the larger buckles connecting to the ball itself had chaffed his skin. Looking closer, they were actually full-blown bruises already darkening where the blood had spilled under the skin, but the area that the metal and leather had rubbed hardest against was torn and raw almost to the point of bleeding.  
The pureblood looked at him inquisitively, realizing what the hunter was staring at, and his expression turned apologetic, in an automatic reaction as if he was to blame for his wounds somehow displeasing Zero. The type of people Kaname was used to interact with made that the pureblood didn't realize that Zero's shock came from the guilt of indirectly causing those wounds, and not from displeasure directed at Kaname himself.

If Zero had been the one to put the ball-gag in place, things might have been different, but because Kaname had been the one to do it, and the pureblood's training had deeply and brutally ingrained in his mind the idea that restraints were to always be tightened to the point of discomfort and beyond, the gag had been strapped extremely tight, causing the chaffing to be particularly bad on such a long time wearing it. Sadly, it hadn't even occurred to the pureblood to tie it more loosely, because of how used he was to always have people tightening it to that same uncomfortable setting. The leather strap had a distinct crease in the usual spot, so he simply slid it to that point and buckled it. In fact, if he'd tightened it less, he'd have been afraid of forming a new crease in another spot, and getting punished by a handler later when they inspected his material and noticed that he hadn't been strapping it as tight as he was supposed to.  
It was also why even now, Kaname didn't quite understand what was going through Zero's head, or that the hunter was blaming himself for Kaname having gotten hurt, and not actually looking at him in disapproval as Kaname had assumed.

Zero took one of Kaname's hands into his, gently but firmly, and the pureblood froze a little in apprehension, but before Kaname could ask what he should do or what Zero wanted, the hunter had unbuckled and removed the leather wrist-shackle, to find a similar burn there, although not as angry looking as the one on the delicate skin of the pureblood's face, so close to his soft lips.  
Kaname's wrists and ankles were permanently bruised because those shackles were worn almost constantly even when not strapped to other restraints, but Zero could easily tell that the reddened area was fresh and caused by the previous night and not just part of the older bruises.

The skin under the body of the wrist-shackle was also slightly chaffed, the areas at the edge of the large thick leather strap being more noticeably bruised, the fresher marks contrasting with the older ones. Kaname's pallor and his delicate skin, allied to his slowed healing due to the anti-vampire drugs, made that anything left marks on his skin very easily. That was something that delighted the customers of the 'house', but seeing the bruises and the scraps only saddened Zero.

Raising the pureblood's wounded wrist to his lips, Zero softly kissed the area more freshly hurt, and Kaname gasped in surprise, his breath catching in his throat at how unexpected the hunter's gesture had been. Little shivers ran through his body with each of the feather-like touches of the hunter's lips.

Zero continued kissing all around the bruised area, and Kaname shuddered hard, his face taking on an attractive shade as his body automatically reacted to the sensations. The brunet was glad that the towel and the coverlet still hid him enough that the hunter didn't see the effect his lips over the vampire's skin were having; Kaname's nipples had distinctly hardened, and only the years of traumatic training made that _another _part of his body didn't follow in the same direction.

The hunter had meanwhile undone the shackle on Kaname's other wrist and, finding it equally bruised, had proceeded to kiss it better as well.

The pureblood did all he could to avoid squirming or whimpering embarrassingly. He was absolutely transfixed by Zero's course of action, and while he did not understand why a hunter would lower himself to kiss a slave's wounded wrists, he was still deeply touched by the gesture, and vampire anatomy being what it was, it was quite pleasurable –wrists were a sensitive place for them, much like all places with a higher blood flow close to the surface of the skin.  
While much of what the hunters said about vampire sexuality was mere propaganda to further debase the race, it was true that their bodies had considerably more erogenous zones than a human's body. It was even truer for the higher ranks, as the sensitivity increased considerably based on the purity of the vampire's blood. A level D or C might not have cared that much more than a human for kisses on his or her wrists, but for a pureblood it was quite something.

And so each time Zero's lips returned to the underside of Kaname's wrists, the brunet almost twitched from the attempt of not letting the pleasure show openly on his face, afraid of what might come out of it. But however much Kaname may try to hide it, the heated glaze taking over his eyes, the way his knees shook slightly, his toes curling against the bedsheets, all of his demeanor, stemming part from the uncertainty he felt about Zero's intentions and part from the innocent awe he felt at the pure pleasure radiating from his skin each time the hunter's lips touched it… there was no way Zero could miss it, and no way he could find it anything other than adorable. Inevitably, to the point that he was tempted to do more than merely caress the brunet's wrists with his lips –and if he reacted that way to the brushing of lips, how much more pleasure would he get from the hunter licking his wrists instead…?

Afraid that if he stayed much longer he might succumb to temptation and push things so much farther than he should, Zero gently broke the contact and got up from the bed, after placing one more gentle kiss on each of the pureblood's bruised wrists.

An apologetic look in his eyes, Zero picked up his jacket and whispered a regretful _'I have to go…'_ in guise of explanation.

Caution thrown aside, Kaname walked him to the door and couldn't help but ask, suddenly afraid of the answer being negative. "Will you come back tonight, Kiryuu-sama?"

The hunter hesitated for a second, but smiled and nodded. "I will. Unless something happens, I definitely will. I will probably come by late though."

Ichiru might be coming back from his gig on that other city tonight, and he'd probably be rather displeased if he got home to find it empty of both family and food, so Zero was planning to be home just to receive his brother and have dinner with him before rushing back to the 'house'.

Even if neither of them was very sure of what was going on or how to face each other after the events of the previous night. _And even if it was completely stupid to come here and take the risk of being tempted to do something to Kaname again._

_Speaking of temptations he couldn't resist…_ Unsure of whether what he was doing was utterly foolish or the right thing, Zero leaned closer, gently sliding his fingers through the pureblood's brown tresses, and softly pressed his lips on the corner of Kaname's mouth, almost touching his lips. Carefully, almost as if he feared the other was made of glass and might break at the slightest sudden movement, the hunter chastely kissed one and then the other of the larger bruises left by the ball-gag.

"If there's one thing I didn't want, it's to give you any more bruises than you already have."

Zero had meant that as so much more than just a comment on the physical bruises left by shackles and other such things. He was dreadfully afraid that his acts in the shower the previous night might have made the pureblood afraid of him, and he was quite surprised by Kaname's reply that followed.

"Kiryuu-sama… I think I… I welcome bruises from you."

The brunet shook slightly, both ashamed and relieved with the confession. He'd wanted to say so much more, something far deeper_, 'I welcome anything from you, even pain…',_ but he'd been afraid of what it would inevitably imply, completely true as it may be.

He already knew that his soul belonged to the hunter standing in front of him, but he was inevitably scared that admitting it aloud might cause even more of a disgrace, by speeding up his ruin, informing the hunter that the game he was playing was no longer necessary since his prey was completely and utterly under his charm.  
A part of him distinctly feared that if the hunter knew that, these blissful moments would immediately end, the mask of gentleness no longer needed and discarded aside.

It was paradoxical perhaps, but Kaname didn't fear bruises from Zero _because_ the hunter was always so gentle and caring with him –if the silver haired man had been as cruel and brutal as all the others, he wouldn't be the same person Kaname had fallen for, and as such, it wouldn't feel quite the same way.

Although Kaname was afraid that if this went on much longer, he might fall for Zero deeply enough that he'd continue welcoming anything from him even after the hunter revealed his true face. Even if the only thing coming from Zero then were to be abuse instead of gentle touches. Now that was a dreadful thought, and one Kaname sadly knew was much too likely to happen.  
The pureblood swallowed dry, wondering if he should take back his words and apologize, but Zero hushed him gently, pressed his chin up with a finger and brought his lips closer again, as if to kiss the bruises once more. For a strange moment that seemed to last much longer than the few seconds it actually lasted, both man and vampire stayed in that position, not daring to move, foreheads almost touching, lips a breath away from each other, Zero's thumb caressing Kaname's cheek gently, tracing the line where the length of the leather straps of the ball-gag had slightly burned the pureblood's delicate skin, leaving a red welt across his cheeks and undefined bruises where the different metal buckles had rubbed more, from the corner of his lips all the way to his ear. Each time the hunter exhaled, soft wafts of air caressed the pureblood's trembling lips.

Kaname was holding his breath, heart hammering in his chest, the hunter's body warmth practically touching the skin of his face, unless the heat he was feeling was from the renewed color rising to his own cheeks.

After what seemed like an eternity, Zero pulled away regretfully, with one last caress to the vampire's bruised skin.

The hunter turned around after meeting the pureblood's gaze for only a second and whispering a quick 'take care', then the door closed shut and Kaname stood in front of it for a long while, staring at the wooden frame as if he could follow the hunter walking down the corridor, just by listening to his footsteps.

_Had Kiryuu-sama been about to... but that's impossible?! No one would ever do that with a slave..._

Kaname's shaking fingers rose to press onto his lips where he could almost still feel the warmth of the other's breath, caressing his skin, inviting and soothing.

_Impossible… impossible, of course._

_And yet… I'd have given so much for him to have stayed one instant longer, and have pressed his lips against mine…_

_Impossible as such a dream may be…_

He slid down to squat by the door with his arms around his knees, pressing his forehead against the wood, unsure whether his heart felt like bursting from happiness from the hunter's touch or from despair at how impossible it all was.

The overwhelming truth that Kaname had come to realize earlier rang in his mind like an inalterable sentence echoing with the sound of each of the hunter's footsteps disappearing down the corridor.

_Even if you were to betray me, I wouldn't mind, Kiryuu-sama… _

Back when he was a child, he'd never expected he'd one day feel that way about anyone but Yuuki. And even though he was now certain that even if he somehow ever became free again—something impossible in itself—, he was far too tainted to ever be worthy of standing near her… it still came as a surprise that his heart could possibly be capable of feeling that way for someone other than her.  
But then, Zero always seemed to cause the impossible within his heart.

A part of the pureblood couldn't help but think that maybe it was meant to be. That fate had led this man on his path, either to give him some respite before his utter doom, or simply to destroy him. He sniffled, leaning his head against the door.

The more he thought about it, the more he felt that it was both painful and strangely freeing.

On one hand, it meant he was completely at the hunter's mercy, his for Zero to break or fix as he pleased, which was a frightening idea, but on another hand, it was dangerously delightful, to know that he had someone that he felt so strongly for that he could actually think such a thing and know it was the truth. _And being destroyed by Zero could only be less horrible than living at Ichiou's mercy, no…?  
_Only the future would be able to tell whether this would be his doom or whether he'd be able to survive such a dangerous attachment to someone who was born to be his natural enemy at best or his tormentor at worst.

He was surprised that he didn't notice right away how hard he was crying, until he saw the tears dripping onto the ground between his feet, the drops making the wet wood darker and contrasting with the rest of the boards.

.

.

Down the corridor, Zero hurried away, a tint of red on his face as his mind turned the question over and over, his older and still deeply ingrained instincts inevitably accusing him.

_Had he been about to kiss a vam-… no, to kiss Kaname's lips just now?!_

_But wasn't it so utterly against nature and unforgivable?!_

_And yet, giving his blood to him, or to a smaller measure even simply holding him gently as he did so often… would have been considered terribly shocking and unforgivable as well, wouldn't it? So, did it really matter…?_

He wasn't quite sure what had been about to happen between them a moment ago, but he was sure of one thing, unfair as it may be.

_Whatever may have been about to happen was impossible, terribly and utterly impossible._

And yet… he wished so badly that he could just turn around, stride back to the pureblood's room, swing that door open, sweep him off his feet and kiss him senseless, until Kaname was too busy to think of all the horrible things all the others had done to him.

If he wasn't so sure of the significant risk that he could very much do those exact same things to Kaname himself –even if less violently— Zero might even have put that idea in practice for real. But as he didn't trust himself enough, he simply breathed a sigh heavy of wistfulness and rushed down the stairs to the ground floor.

_._

_So small a wish, yet so painfully unattainable..._

.

.

.

_[tbc]_

_

* * *

_

_The title of this chapter comes from the song "Lose You Tonight" (although the original line is "I'm not gonna lose you tonight", but I wanted to have it said from Kaname's viewpoint and I think he might have said "going to" instead of "gonna", in the context XD). And as always for CoB, it is a song by the band HIM. :D  
Gotta LOVE the "Thulsa Doom" extended version of that song!!_

_There's a bit of a step forward for them in this chapter, though they're both still hesitant and slow with all their uncertainties, as they usually are in CoB… they need a bit of an exterior push from a third part sometime. ;) _

_Incidentally "I want someone to tie me up" is truly a line Kaname has said in canon VK! XD Although he was speaking metaphorically then… but it was still such a delicious moment. 8D  
_

_Zero has started to realize just how irresistible Kaname is, and how dangerously close he himself is to doing something that might shatter the brunet's trust in him… And yet, depending on how he went at it, it might be just as soothing as his other caresses, but with Kaname's certainty that Zero intends to break him sooner or later, and Zero's black-or-white view of things telling him that touching Kaname that way would be doing the same the other people are doing, neither of them is in the position to make any good decisions without possibly dramatic consequences. :X  
Unless fate maybe takes things out of their hands and introduces a bit of an exterior element of surprise to throw things out of their slow hesitant wanderings… ;)_

_And btw, i__n chapter 18 there was a bit more about why Zero didn't want to sleep at the 'house'. It's not that Kaname could actually cause much harm to Zero considering how powerful of a hunter Zero is and how weakened Kaname is because of the anti-vampire drugs, but basically, if for whatever reason Kaname got in bloodlust and somehow managed to hurt Zero, even if just a bit, and someone found out, Kaname would probably be executed. Any slave harming a hunter is put to death.  
There's that, and the whole taboo... hence why Zero ended up, in the heat of the situation, accepting Kaname's idea of strapping him to the bed. Although of course, things would have gone differently if Zero had known beforehand that Kaname would get hurt from tossing around in the leather stuff all night. :X_

_

* * *

_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	23. Three little words and a question why

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 23 – "**__**Three little words and a question why**__**."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_**This is AU, so Zero grew up as a hunter in the notorious Kiryuu clan, was never bitten and didn't go through the trauma of being turned into a vampire.  
**_

_Well, this was the longest delay between chapters ever, for this story… Sorry!! D:  
Thank you always for your lovely support and for continuing to read and enjoy CoB despite it being a more slow-pace series, and despite my occasional epic delays. ^^;_

_The good news is, by the second half of the chapter things should be finally picking up a bit of speed in the story, whether it's for the best or for the worse for the troubled couple… XD;  
_

* * *

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Not everything in the world ever works ideally, as it seems that fate has equal potential to be a gentle lover or a cruel tormenter.

But if there's a common characteristic that even people of the farthest apart backgrounds seem to share, it's that nothing ever seems to make initially as much sense as it all does once the person can turn back and look at it all in the past. What might have seemed like blind chaos will finally be clear then… albeit by that time it might be too late.

After something tragic happens, it is in the human nature –or the vampire nature, it seems in that at least both races are the same— to look back and reminisce all that has gone awry, occasionally to dwell bitterly in all things that could or should have been done differently to maybe have averted the disaster. But before the tragedy actually strikes, the victim seems to be oftentimes tragically clueless.  
Naturally so, for each and every one of those seemingly meaningful little events that slowly precipitate the course of one's life into potential disaster are never quite as obvious or discernible at the exact moment they happen.

And as such, much as he may suspect that it was dangerous to overtly spend so much time at the house, Zero could not see the full picture of the discontent growing around himself, among his friends, family and other close ones.

Truth to be said, the situation had not yet reached the most dangerous levels such things can escalate to. Far from that.  
But it was already getting bad, considering that the young hunter spent hours at the 'house' each night, deprived himself of sleep on a frighteningly constant basis –something that he hoped his fellow hunters didn't notice, but the shadows growing under his eyes were more and more obvious —, spent his days tired and cranky, glaring left and right and snapping at his colleagues at the slightest problem, often absent in mind if not in body during the few time he spent with his friends and other close ones eating lunch at the headquarters or during other such activities. And he'd pretty much disappeared from his friends' lives. He was never terribly close to people at the office or the type to frequent parties or go drinking with his colleagues often, but the absence was still glaringly obvious.

And while the friends and acquaintances might simply ponder on what could be occupying so much of Zero's mind, and the family –Ichiru— was so rarely home that it didn't really matter… others might not see the current situation with a very good eye.

Zero was extremely professional and far too good of a hunter to make any obvious slips just because he was tired, so the situation luckily hadn't gotten the attention of the higher levels of hierarchy among the association yet. But it did catch the attention of a higher-ranked hunter who knew Zero far too well to not find the situation strange and worrisome: Touga Yagari.

Zero's master was so much more than only a teacher or a hierarchic superior for him— he was far closer to a father than anything—, and he was increasingly worried by his former student's erratic behavior. He wasn't sure of what exactly was happening, but he had the feeling it was some sort of exterior influence, and had started to ask questions left and right.

Only time would be able to tell whether the older hunter's sudden interest in the matter would be the seed for tragedy or not…

--

Zero returned home from work early that day, and waited for quite a while, but as it turned out, Ichiru didn't return at the time he'd claimed he would.

That was hardly new with him – if there was one thing Zero had grown accustomed to, it was to be stood up. Punctuality and Ichiru didn't always mix, especially when it involved getting home at a particular time.  
Zero figured his younger twin might have left the city his band had their gig at later than planned, and would be back some time later that night.

Staying home to wait would mean leaving Kaname at the mercy of the whole length of the rush hour at the 'house' –something he was already currently enduring—, and that was out of the picture. So Zero prepared as quick as he could a meal of various things he knew his brother liked particularly, then left Ichiru a note and hurried out to try and make it to the 'house' before the worst of the rush hour finished, or at least on time to hopefully block the last big waves of lustful customers from getting a go at the pureblooded brunet.

Luckily, traffic wasn't bad around that hour, and so Zero got to reach the _blood district_ relatively quickly despite living far from it.

However, due to the time waiting for Ichiru, several of the busiest hours of the night had already passed by, bringing with them the usual hordes of brutal men, hunters or not, with no regard or mercy for the enslaved vampires offered for their pleasure. The display window was empty, and the most popular slaves were getting past the point of mere weariness from overexertion and abuse.

By the time Zero got to enter the room, Kaname was on the ground. He'd seemed unconscious initially, but he'd actually just been trying to regain his forces to get up before a handler came to check on him though, and seeing Zero open the door was enough delight that it could almost make him forget the physical pain.  
The hunter rushed to his side, and the pureblood weakly raised himself as well as he could, a smile gracing his delicate features despite the visible strain of weariness and pain weighting on them.  
Kaname tried to pull himself up, mostly using his elbows since his wrists were still tightly shackled together, the previous customer not having bothered to untie him. The brunet's body protested the effort of trying to stand up, and he sagged back down, managing to get into an awkward sitting position and leaning his scrapped back softly against the foot of the bed as his muscles gave out.  
This annoyed the brunet considerably-- he'd been expecting that Zero would come by late if he came at all that night, but he'd been hoping to somehow manage to last long enough that he wouldn't be in such a pitiful state by the time the hunter got there. Weakness may be an unavoidable permanent situation due to the drugs and all, but that didn't make it any less infuriating to Kaname.

Within instants, Zero was unclasping the restraints and carefully pulling the pureblood up into his arms to check on him and to gently lift him onto the bed. Kaname melted into the contact, ashamed at his failure but not bothering to hold back now, soaking up the attention and kindness he so yearned for, much like a planted starved for water or light. His main remaining reluctance was the fear to get the hunter's clothes dirty, as his skin was bare and still covered in blood and various fluids, but Zero seemed to ignore the problem, however much Kaname tried to keep the most soiled parts of his body from touching the hunter's garments.

Even after the recent bathroom incident, Zero's visits were still the only moments when the pureblood truly felt alive, and even a mere second of the silver-haired hunter's presence was enough to give him the will to withstand everything else that the 'house' threw at him the rest of the time.

"Kaname… what happened?"

"No… nothing out of the usual. The last customer was a little rough, it's all."

A _'little rough' _would hardly cover the amount of bruises the pureblood was sporting, or the nail marks leaving bloody trails on the soft mounds of his backside… But compared to so many other things he was used to, he wasn't lying, it really wasn't much.

There was a resigned pain in the pureblood's eyes that sent a spike of something to the hunter's gut… that powerful protectiveness that the hunter still couldn't explain to himself, but that he'd slowly decided to not try to analyze constantly anymore, and just accept it as an inevitable feeling when it came to this mysteriously compelling creature.  
Instead of questioning the need to touch that delicate skin, Zero simply accepted the harmless enough urge to tend to the brunet's wounds, and examined the bruises after helping the vampire lay down on his back on the bed.

Kaname sucked his breath in, holding back a hiss of both pain and pleasure as the hunter's gentle fingers slid over the bruised skin of his stomach, checking for ruptured ribs or anything amiss.  
Kaname would have told Zero that it was most likely unnecessary considering how hard to break his bones were –although every so often there were customers who managed to do it— but the feeling of the hunter's hands sliding over his fevered skin was too pleasant to dissuade him.

The pureblood's stomach was a mottled mess of fresh bruises that left no doubt to Zero about what had happened, most likely someone's foot connecting with it repeatedly. The hunter's guess was correct: the previous customer had kicked the brunet violently and repeatedly, as Kaname lay curled on the ground after the man had rendered him almost unconscious

Kaname wanted to tell Zero that he didn't mind the pain much if at all now that the hunter was here, but his throat felt tight and the words refused to come, so he simply pressed his head back against the mattress and stayed silent, eyes squeezed tight shut, trying to focus on the pain rather than on the tantalizing bliss. Zero's touch was awakening both sensations and sending the vampire's skin crawling with delight, craving for so much more contact with each tempting brushing movement of those nimble fingers. _Such a dangerous longing it was…_

It hurt, but it hurt so _good_.

He wished he could feel that pain forever if that meant the hunter would never cease touching him. Of course, it wasn't something he could possibly demand or hope for, so he just basked in the delight of the moment at hand, almost holding his breath in hopes of making it last longer.

Finally, Zero pulled himself out of his thoughts, noticed the expression on the pureblood's face and, mistaking it for pain, pulled his hand away quickly. Kaname let out a near inaudible mix of a gasp and a sigh, wistful and needy as he felt the touch he so craved being pulled away from him.

"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?"

"No… Not at all, Kiryuu-sama!"

The smile that graced his lips was so beautiful that Zero had to look away for a second, afraid he'd be the one blushing if he held the pureblood's deep gaze a moment longer. It was one thing to try and not ask oneself too many questions about why he felt like protecting Kaname— it was another thing altogether to be able to resist such radiant looks from one so brutalized and hurt… especially when the looks and smiles awakened yet a different urge within Zero, one far harder to explain. Or more exactly, a mess of different urges…

_The urge to hold the pureblood in his arms forever and ever, never letting go, never letting anyone else touch him or hurt him ever again._

Something not only impossible but unforgivable at the eyes of pretty much everybody that composed the world they both lived in.

…And a different urge, made of pure lust, far less noble and by far more inacceptable in Zero's opinion. One that he wished he could conceal better than that. The urge to make that slender body all his, to mark the brunet in ways that would leave no doubts of his ownership, and that would have all others recognize Kaname as his. The lust in that was practically unbearable. But that urge was incompatible with his urge to protect the brunet and treat him as a sentient being and not like the sex toy like everybody else viewed him as… _or wasn't it?_

Zero was not only more and more unsure of his own intentions, but also of what would be _'right'_ or not, uncertainty filling him as a collateral effect of his effort to cast away the rules a twisted society had taught him, for the sake of finding what he himself might truly view as fair and just.

When the hunter had looked back at the pureblood after examining him –caressing him, even—, Zero had an undecipherable look in his eyes, born of all the mixed emotions he was trying to conceal within himself. But for a second that confusing mix had faltered and a terrible, colossal lust had flashed in the hunter's gaze before being quickly hidden. It was covered up remarkably fast, but not fast enough for Kaname to miss it. The pureblood's breath hitched in his chest.

And yet, to Kaname's surprise, it wasn't fear he felt first in response to the sight… but _desire_. And that somewhat scared him even more than a natural fear might have.

And to make matters worse, that desire came along with a most disturbing suggestion, within the brunet's mind.

_If Kiryuu-sama wanted to do something, _anything_ to me… then… then maybe I could, no, __**should**__… maybe I should…_

…

_Wait, what… ?!_

The thought that automatically came to his mind was shockingly unexpected enough that Kaname froze for a moment, horrified that his mind had immediately suggested that he actually _**should**_ automatically offer himself to the hunter.  
Not that that sort of activity wasn't a constant part of his daily life, but the big difference lied in the fact that he didn't normally have a _choice_ over what was done to his body and when.  
Having that option, or even considering things from an angle that suggested that he could be making that sort of choice was frighteningly unfamiliar.

The idea that he should offer himself to Zero had crossed his mind many times in the past, but it had been at some points out of a sense of duty out of what he owed the man and at other times out of the fear of what might happen if he didn't please the man by doing it soon, and various similar trains of thought, while now… _things felt different._

He'd never had to deal with wondering whether he should or should not offer himself, because no one ever _asked_ him, people simply ordered him to assume whatever position they wanted, or they shoved him over the side of the nearest piece of furniture and did as they pleased to his body without bothering to even speak to him, as if he was so much of an object or a beast that speech would be wasted in him.

It was one thing when the customers took him by force, or even when he automatically submitted to them because he knew he had no other choice, but it was a whole other thing to start wondering what he should or could do based on feelings or perceived impressions. He was unskilled at taking initiative beyond simple actions–not a surprise considering that sort of thing usually earned a slave brutal punishment rather than any form of praise—, and while he was a master at reading in another person's eyes whether or not they were likely to give him a beating anytime soon, he was terribly inexperienced in trying to guess pleasant feelings and moods and how to react to them or when.

Not only that, but even now he still wasn't sure of what rules Zero intended to play by. Nor how much longer this gentle act was going to last.

The image the brunet's mind produced was one of him offering himself to the hunter by his own choice, like he'd so catastrophically attempted to do and failed some nights ago, but the difference was that back then, he'd done it under the influence of the utter despair allied to the alcohol and anti-vampire drugs flooding his system. Now on the other hand, he was exhausted and hurting physically but there wasn't anything to justify that his mind would whisper to him such poor strategies instead of the caution that he knew to be much safer route for the time being.  
So it was naturally surprising for him to be feeling the urge to try such an offer again, even more so when that urge wasn't born of despair and the will to end their _'game'_ once and for all like the previous time… but simply because seeing that the hunter might actually want him that way made him feel compelled to give him what he wanted, whatever it may be. _Anything to please you…_

Truth to be said, the pureblood had quite a bit of trouble guessing what Zero might be thinking –the thought processes of a hunter who didn't seem to feel like beating the life out of you every instant seemed to be something impossible to grasp to someone who'd lived through ten years of captivity like Kaname—, and that uncertainty was one of the things pushing him to cling to any of the hunter's looks or reactions that he might actually be able to recognize or understand; in a way, the lust that had shone in the hunter's eyes was a familiar buoy floating amidst unknown waters.

But wanting to offer himself to someone out of his own free will and not because he was forced to it… It was such an unexpected idea for him, such an uncharted territory, that it was only normal that panic would kick in as well.  
The thought alone was so extremely opposed to all that Kaname had expected to feel, that he could only fear this reaction even more. Not only worried about the other man's intentions, but fearing also what new betrayal his own body might spring on him next, to top the growing desires and needs he didn't seem to be able to forget. _It wasn't bad enough to find himself yearning more and more for the innocent caresses, now he also found himself having ridiculous pulsions at the slightest show of lust on the hunter's part._ It seemed that each time he thought he couldn't disgust himself any further, he always managed to sink a little deeper in his own image of himself.

They were both quick to break eye contact and dismiss the unexpected thought though, so Zero never realized that Kaname had _not only_ noticed what he'd been thinking of, but had had a similar reaction as well…

Worse yet, not only Kaname felt this inexplicable compulsion to offer himself, but he wasn't even sure if his body and his heart weren't both betraying him at once: He was sure that if he went through with it and Zero did _touch_ him that way, he'd be unable to control himself any further. Resisting the onslaught of sensations the man had caused during the shower incident had taken all Kaname had. He wasn't sure he would be able to resist again if Zero pushed any further against his worn down barriers, so soon after the last time. He needed to focus, to recoup and rebuild his shields, but that was an impossible task when the only thing the young brunet could think of at the moment was how the man's lips would have felt against his own if Zero had stayed one moment longer and had kissed him, the previous night.

The brunet was still under a number of mistaken impressions, such as the idea that Zero would inevitably turn against him, and it influenced how he viewed other things, making him assume that even when Zero had left him alone in the bathroom after the incident the other day, it had been because he'd displeased the hunter somehow, causing him to leave. Or that the hunter's reactions couldn't be truly innocent and had to be staged for some purpose, however much Kaname's heart rebelled against the mere notion of Zero's warmth not being real.

Not only that, but he knew well that there were no more barriers he could possibly raise when it came to the silver-haired hunter. If Zero chose to push him further, Kaname would fall apart in his arms, ruining everything in his eyes, whether Zero's gentleness was sincere or not.

The certainty that this hunter –like any other hunter, as Kaname's slave training had so clearly ingrained in his mind— would be disgusted of him if he ever showed any signs of arousal haunted the pureblood day and night.

And it scared him also that he couldn't possibly deny _wanting_ that touch so very desperately. Wanting the man's caresses, his lips, his hands, his everything, even if it frightened him beyond all rational thought.

It didn't scare him _only_ because he still expected Zero to hurt him. By now, even though he was certain Zero _would _inevitably hurt him sooner or later, he couldn't possibly hold back, not with how the hunter's presence had become more and more the very air he breathed.

Until Zero came into his life, Kaname had reached points where he felt so low that he wasn't 100% sure anymore of how real his past could have been, or whether that dream was too beautiful to have actually existed. It was easy to lose track of time in such a situation, and he wasn't quite sure of how long he'd been a slave either. In the worse days, it felt more and more that maybe the people holding him prisoner and using him might be right in their idea of him; he'd had days so bleak that he'd gotten to think that maybe he truly was all the disgusting things they viewed him as, or was in any case well on his way to becoming that for sure, since it was unlikely he would ever be free again.  
And now, much as each moment spent with Zero may be a roller coaster of emotions –some definitely positive but many tainted by the utter dread the brunet had of losing everything when Zero would inevitably finally decide to abandon him—, those moments were also for Kaname a slow and painstaking journey in regaining his own sense of worth, even in simple little gestures like playing chess or reading a book. Those may be simple things for free men, but even the mere act of being able to read a page of a book represented a whole forbidden world for the brunet. Something tantalizing, brought within his reach only by the whim of the unfathomably kind hunter. _So it was only natural that he should be feeling the urge to do all he possibly could to express his devotion to the one and only person in ten years who'd made him feel like a living thing rather than a sex doll, wasn't it…?_

But it wasn't so simple, it wasn't anymore just about trying to repay a favor --nothing could repay the value Kaname placed in those little moments with the hunter anyway. And the desires he now felt scared him also because his experience with sex was far from being a positive one, and he'd spent far too long fearing his own reactions and what he might become if one day his body stopped rejecting all unwanted touches and begun instead to welcome it… from all the customers.  
He was deadly afraid that even if his precious Kiryuu-sama were to ever touch him in a gentle manner, the innocent feeling born from Zero's touch might be the key for his already traitorous flesh to betray him even further, getting his body used to associating sensual contact with something positive instead of pain alone, and suddenly accepting pleasure freely from anyone's touch, turning him into a whore even more than he already believed he was. The brunet didn't trust himself or his own body. He'd already lost far too much of himself and of who he was –or _should have been_, and had no way to know such a thing wouldn't happen.

_If his body learned to welcome this man's touches, what was to say the traitorous thing wouldn't react the same way to everybody else as well?!_

In his eyes, as long as it was rape, he was dirty, soiled and broken, maybe even a mere object in the hands of his tormentors, but not quite fully 'sold out', not in his heart. In a way, at least; there were unfortunately many dark days in which he felt so deeply tainted that not even that idea made him feel like there was anything salvageable within his soul. It was a terrible way of seeing things considering that he was nothing more than a victim, but the pureblood judged himself far too harshly, driven by the disgust he felt for himself and his predicament.  
If one day those sensations and feelings became something his body welcomed, even desired and sought out… if he started to find pleasure instead of disgust in being touched by the people who violated his body regularly, then he was sure everything would be completely lost. _Whatever was still left of him would be lost for sure._

Somehow, he always seemed to find yet another new thing to agonize over, each new fear worse than the previous one.

And yet another idea that instilled dread in his mind: he was pretty sure that whatever strange reason his Kiryuu-sama might have to be gentle to him, it would certainly fade away if the hunter saw how tainted his protégé truly was, and how even worse he could become with time. _If his body became the way he feared, would Kiryuu-sama be revulsed and turn away in disgust? Not even such inexplicable gentleness could possibly forgive such filth… could it?_

The thought brought a burning heat to his eyes. He blinked the moisture away, although the look of misery he sported wasn't lost to Zero, who assumed it was due to the beating the pureblood had just suffered, or to the horrible things he endured on a daily basis.

The hunter sighed angrily, furious both at the 'house' and at himself, for his inability to properly protect the broken pureblood even when he was trying his best, even when he practically spent his nights there lately, as if he kept watch over him to keep any abusers at bay. But there were always more and more abusers, and he had his work and family making it impossible for him to spend any more time than he already did with the pureblood. There would always be a moment or another when he couldn't be there, and it was becoming more and more painful to accept that he might be unable to change that situation.

Kaname was sitting up now, unsure of what was causing the annoyance emanating from his protector—as as it was his nature, he couldn't help feeling that it had to be his fault.  
Irrationally, he thought that perhaps Zero could somehow sense his secret desires… that the hunter had some unknown way to know that the brunet wanted him to continue touching him, more and more, and inevitably…

_It must disgust him…_

Kaname's stomach lurched, and it took a lot from him to be able to control the shaking that threatened to take over his body at the idea that Zero might feel that way. To think of the possibility of the hunter being disgusted of him if he fell even lower over time was one thing, but to feel right here and right now that his benefactor was already disgusted, was far more tragically real and immediate.  
And in the twisted world the brunet lived in, he wasn't allowed pleasure or desires, and so it seemed natural to assume that even though the hunter might want to touch him for his own pleasure, the man would still be disgusted if he found out that _Kaname_ also desired those touches. _Slaves existed to give pleasure, so it defeated the purpose if they were the ones receiving it, no?_ Training had conditioned him to the idea he was a tool for other's pleasures, and his own was taboo.

_My hands, my body, everything I ever touch is tainted and ruined immediately…_

Kaname lowered his head quickly, clenching his teeth to fight the renewed burning in his eyes, so much more difficult to conceal now. He didn't want to disgust the hunter even further with his display of emotion over an issue that clearly must irritate the man, and so he tried his best to minimize his reaction and control himself as much as he could; his knuckles turned white where they were pressed hard against the bed sheets, fingers and knees shaking softly despite his best effort, and much to his renewed shame.

Zero may not know what was going through the pureblood's mind, or the depths of unfounded fears Kaname could muster from the tiniest of the hunter's expressions, but the reaction was plain enough to see however much the brunet may try to conceal it. To try and help dispelling whatever was causing the pureblood's increasingly sorrowful mood, Zero pulled out the chess set he'd brought with him, wrapped inside a protective towel in a bag. Kaname's face lit up at the sight of it, not only because he enjoyed playing considerably, but also because it was a silent and somewhat much 'safer' form of communication between them, free of complicated worries and intricate fears – a form of interaction where the brunet could pour in his heart and soul without fearing what might happen or the potentially ill fated consequences of his words or acts, the way he feared with his every gesture when the board was not between them. In a way, the game offered them a neutral terrain where the horrors of the real world didn't reach them as much, and where Kaname could spread his tentative wings without fear of consequences, under the gentle protection of Zero, their respective moves more like a dance than a mere chess confrontation.

The brunet showered quickly while Zero tossed aside the dirty sheets and set up the board, and what they had left of the night was spent in an uneventful silence, even though the awkwardness brought by Kaname's mournful mood never left them. The chess game was occasionally interrupted by one or the other making an attempt to talk and then losing the nerve and speaking of unrelated little things instead. Despite the progresses Kaname had been making little by little recently, Zero won game after game, the brunet being too troubled to play properly, which in turn only increased his despondency.

It was imperative that they have a serious talk some time soon, but both sides were far too afraid of the consequences such a talk could have, and were desperately clinging to the time they no longer had, hoping they could delay the moment of that conversation that should have happened long ago already. But if _had_ happened then, they would perhaps not be as close as they were now.

Finally, Zero's gaze wandered to the clock as it chimed to indicate the passing of yet one more hour, and the silver-haired hunter realized how late it was and how quickly he would have to rush home if he wanted to have any hope to sleep enough before work the next day.

As they walked to the door, Zero making sure he hadn't forgotten anything and Kaname accompanying him up until the threshold, a cold feeling churned inside the brunet.

It was no longer a mere matter of wistfulness and impossible wishes like the idea of Zero's lips brushing his own— Kaname was trembling softly now, because something deeply primal, in his very blood warned him that tragedy was on its way, and he might not ever see his silver-haired protector anymore.

Or if he ever did see him again, it wouldn't be as the kind guardian he'd grown so dependent of, but as a completely different and much more frightening person…

_But why now?! Why now of all times?!_

He'd have understood if that ill omen had came to him after a particularly problematic moment – such as the shower incident, when he'd been so certain that he was about to lose Zero that he'd thrown away his fear for himself and rushed after him to stop him from leaving, afraid he wouldn't return if he left right then and there.  
But now of all times, what could possibly be about to happen? Things were as awkward and hesitant as ever, but if anything, the hesitant closeness between them was rebuilding anew. _So why now…_  
They'd overcome worse things, surely Kiryuu-sama wouldn't decide to end his 'game' of sorts with him just because of the feeling he got earlier… _would he?_  
The pureblood despaired of not knowing how important this element might be in the hunter's eyes, and whether or not he might actually put an end to their interactions because of it.

Contrary to Kaname, Zero seemed pretty much immune to any prophetic disaster signs or anything of the sort, and merely shuddered as he opened the door, as if the chill of the late night was setting in as he left the room. Maybe he'd felt it too, but if he did, no signs of it showed on his face as he turned around and raised his hand to caress the pureblood's cheeks in a familiar gesture, gentle fingers tucking a stray lock of brown hair behind the brunet's ear.

"Take care, Kaname…"

No matter how many times Zero had said those words since the first time they'd met, the ring of his voice as the words rolled out sounded even more meaningful tonight, as if he was hoping the injunction could somehow protect the beleaguered vampire from all that threatened him.

Kaname clung to the man's hand, closing his eyes and pressing his cheek to the cupped fingers, his delicate lips parting for a brief second in a quiver, considering whether he should or not voice out his fears, and then deciding that he had no right to beg the hunter for more time.

_He wouldn't do such a thing. It may hurt more than anything he'd experienced in a while, but he owed it to Kiryuu-sama to play his game until the very last minute, after all the man had done for him. It might be over or it might not, but whatever the future might bring, he'd at least show the hunter this strength, little as it may be._

And so Kaname simply smiled softly, the pain forced under control but clearly visible through the hint of resigned misery in his shimmering eyes.

When he met the hunter's gaze, his smile grew sweeter and wider just for Zero, like a parting gift before the pureblood closed his eyes and lowered his head so that his long lashes and unruly hair would shadow his face and hide the tears threatening to pearl up in his eyes and the blush spreading on his cheeks. _There was no more time for tears and weakness... __Even if it broke completely whatever was left of his heart. _

"Thank you, Kiryuu-sama… for everything."

.

.

.

The wheels of fate that had rusted in place with the years since Kaname first arrived at the 'house', had only recently started to move again.  
And for Zero and the young pureblood, the whole thing was being set into faster motion all of a sudden, with a shove given by an unexpected agent of chaos elsewhere in the city, Ichiru Kiryuu…

Yagari happened by chance to be at the central station of the capital that night, to send off a colleague taking a late train, and spotted Ichiru walking into a local souvenir store at the station.  
He knew of the younger Kiryuu's gig out of town and was surprised to find him here, but there were more immediate concerns on his mind at the moment, and so he followed the young man in, very intent on asking him some questions that had been troubling him recently.  
Ichiru had sensed his approach moments before Yagari called out for him however, and if he was surprised to see his ex-master pop out at the station and confront him about his brother, no such feeling showed on his face.

"I found out that Zero was sick a few days ago?" Yagari inquired directly, the stern look on his face making it clear that he knew something was going on. "Sick enough to have to skip work, which is pretty damn sick by his standards. I've seen him show up at the office before in days where he was feverish even. Normally, we practically have to force him to go back home if he's badly sick."

Yagari almost added that Zero wasn't '_the type to skip on a whim just because of mere little moment of sickness'_, but a remainder of tactfulness silenced him. Ichiru had spent his childhood having to skip training sessions due to fever bouts, and the subject was sensitive. Master and ex-disciple may often be at odds, but Yagari was not cruel without reasons, and he didn't intend to offend the younger man by throwing his weaknesses back in his face.  
He was however _very_ determined to find out what was going on, as things were far too strange for his taste around the Kiryuu home, lately.

The evening of Zero's supposed sickness, Yagari had dropped by and found the apartment empty, but he only found out afterwards that Zero hadn't been at work that day, and by then he had to leave for a two-days long mission himself, so he didn't have the chance to directly ask his disciple where he'd truly been that day.

"Hmm, yeah. He was sick, but it wasn't anything bad, he went back to work right the next day."

Ichiru brushed the questions off, visibly only giving Yagari half of his attention while he ran his eyes over the display of sweets and dessert breads, pondering on whether to get anything extra or not, fingers absentmindedly wandering over the raised edges of the decorative boxes.

The attitude alone was already enough to get on Yagari's nerves, but the way the younger man seemed disinclined to tell him anything irritated the master hunter even more. Both of them appeared to simultaneously decide that it was time to get more direct.

"Funny that he wasn't home all day the day of his supposed sickness. I dropped by. And don't tell me he was at the hospital or anything, I'm not so gullible."

"Perhaps you could ask him directly?"

"Yeah. Or perhaps I could ask you what _you_ are doing at the central station so late, picking up food specialties that are actually from another city. At an hour where there's no trains coming from said city, so there's no way you just happened to arrive. Ichiru, if I wasn't convinced that you have nothing to hide, I might even remind you that this is the typical behavior of husbands who come back from fake business trips and drop by the main station to pick up regional souvenirs, so that their wives won't find out they never went where they claimed they went… "

It was disturbingly close to reality, since the supposed gig was just a story Ichiru had made up to stay away from home for a bit. In truth he'd been with Shizuka all along, and Yagari was closer to the truth than it felt safe...

Ichiru's eyes widened suddenly, but he had his back to the other man, and he was a master at concealing his feelings, so his surprise remained unnoticed.  
He realized well that Yagari was bluffing and didn't actually know about his lie. The older hunter was merely suggesting something that could be seen as a simple joke if he was wrong, or that could push Ichiru to betray himself in his reaction if he was right. But Ichiru was far too skilled at wordplay and subtle things – years of conversations with a pureblood did that to people—and so instead of displaying any signs of having been caught red-handed, the younger Kiryuu twin broke out in a crystalline and apparently perfectly innocent laughter, turning around with a look of amused innocence painted all over his face.

"Paranoia much, master? I am indeed guilty of dropping by here to pick up souvenirs for Zero, but that's because the guys and I left for the charted bus in a hurry when we were almost late, and so I completely forgot to buy what he'd asked. I didn't want to have him feel like I'd forgotten his foodstuffs when he'd been looking forward to those cakes so much, so I took a taxi to come aaall the way here and buy a box of them. So, satisfied? You can even have some too if he leaves us any."

The smirk on Ichiru's face was definitely impish, but there was absolutely nothing to reveal that he wasn't speaking the truth. His story was flawless, impossible to easily countercheck on the spot, and covered him perfectly. Besides, Ichiru wasn't an active-duty hunter, so Yagari had no real legal grounds for complaining much about his private life if he wasn't breaking any laws, and while he did think Ichiru probably wasn't quite as innocent as he may seem, the truth was that Yagari had no idea just how far things went, and didn't feel the need to look any deeper than that into what the younger man did on his own time. He assumed whatever Ichiru may have to hide was innocent enough and just his own private business, so he hadn't felt any urge to actually investigate.

Which was probably a good thing for Yagari himself, as he also had no idea how dangerous Ichiru could actually be. There was no way to know which of them would come out alive if they ever did face each other in a serious fight. Ichiru's weakness was true back in his childhood years, but nowadays it was just a cover to avoid making others suspicious; his current real power was probably well above his former teacher's.  
Luckily, Yagari had no real interest in provoking Ichiru, and the younger Kiryuu twin had too much at stake to do something as risky as killing someone influent and close to his family like Yagari.

Ichiru couldn't care less if Zero had a favorite in a brothel or not, since his older twin seemed to be using the slave as some sort of nice-looking punching bag, from what Ichiru believed after his visit to Kaname.  
If Zero had been attached to the vampire, it would have been a whole different story –Ichiru was terribly jealous of Zero's affections after all— but since it didn't seem to be the case based on what he knew of the relationship, Ichiru didn't mind much.  
But the younger twin was definitely annoyed, both at Zero directly and indirectly for his escapades causing their master to come poking his nose in his business of all things. I wouldn't harm to send Yagari back his way, to go meddle in Zero's business instead of bothering him.

And as such, Ichiru threw a dreadful little piece of info his way.

"As for Zero, master… well, don't tell him I told you, but if you absolutely _must_ know where he spends all his time these days, there's a certain brothel in the blood district…" An odd expression took over Ichiru's features, half-confiding and half-hesitantly worried, wonderfully hiding the amusement the younger twin was actually feeling at the shocked look that had immediately taken over Yagari's face in response to his words.  
Their master may be a traditionalist and an old-school hunter, but he was also a believer that vampires should be dealt with quickly and with a bullet to the head --merciful when possible but definitive either way.  
Yagari was not one for frequenting 'houses' or taking advantage of the slavery –he distrusted the vampires far too much to get naked with one, even if he'd been the type to spend an hour or two with one. And while he may have accepted that Zero might want to go there from time to time, the idea of him being a regular of such places was truly worrisome. The horror on the older man's face was not prudish disdain, but worry for Zero.

"I've been so worried lately, master. Zero spends all his time with that favorite of his in that horrible place of temptation… A pureblood no less, you know how cunning and deceitful those animals are. Zero is young and inexperienced, I'm afraid of what that bloodsucker could put in his head. I've actually been meaning to ask you for help for a while, because you could talk to Zero about it with more of an impact and I thought it would be good if someone discussed the issue with him… but I hesitated for so long, I felt so bad about the idea of betraying Zero's secret, which has been hiding so carefully… He must have known you wouldn't approve, but couldn't resist the seduction of that filthy vampire! I bet this is why he kept it so secret all along!"

The look of innocent and sincere worry and a mix of guilt and relief that Ichiru was now displaying were most puzzling to Yagari, because it seemed so uncharacteristic of the younger twin that the master hunter almost felt like he was looking at Zero –who was more likely to sport such a sincere face—than at Ichiru. The impression was enhanced by the fact that ever since Ichiru had cut his hair shorter, the twins were even more perfectly identical.  
The weird feeling of something being off was instantly brushed away, however, due to the colossal worry Yagari was now feeling for Zero, and that clouded his vision.

"No, Ichiru, don't worry about the secret, really! And I won't tell him how I found out, of course. You did the right thing in confessing this to me. It's very serious!!"

There was a terrible gravity in the older hunter's gaze, and for a moment Ichiru wondered if perhaps he'd laid it on a little too thick. He shrugged away the thought though, as he didn't really see anything to lose either way. At worst, Yagari would throw a fit and Zero would have to stop visiting the brothel to placate his dear master. That might annoy Zero, but it's not like he'd miss his pureblood punching-bag much anyway, considering Ichiru was pretty sure Zero's relationship with his favorite was merely one of simple violence.  
One way or another, it didn't matter, in Ichiru's eyes. It was hard not to crack up laughing when he saw the deep worry take over the scarred face of their old master in response to his little tale. Of course, he could have mentioned what he knew of Zero's relationship with the slave, which would no doubt surprise Yagari but would also certainly reassure him considerably… although where would be the fun then?

The way the younger twin saw things, it was a little as if he'd always been watching things from afar, pulling a string here and there at the right moment, and watching how all the events unwrapped, the puppets dancing to the music he'd set, just perfectly. Ever since he was a child and would spend days and days in bed, seeing the real world through a window or through the stories Zero would tell him as he got home from school or from training, Ichiru had started to regard things that way, little by little. The world outside seemed almost unreal, whatever happened in it devoid of consequences for his own life. He'd lived by proxy through Zero then, and now he did so through his masks. The mask of the perfect little brother for Zero, of the slightly rebellious ex-disciple for Yagari and so on… he just played along and gave them the image of him they were expecting to see, reassuring them and providing them with the right input so that they'd continue believing in this fantasy and would go on dancing to his tune. The only one who knew his true face was probably Shizuka…

As Ichiru's mind turned to more serious considerations, Yagari was already walking away, with an out-of-place lost look on his face, in such a contrast to how firm and decided he normally was.

_I can't believe you, Zero… What were you thinking?! I thought I trained you better than that!! _

But determination was quick to dispel the uncertain look on the older man's face, replacing it instead with a burning fury.

_You can be sure of one thing though, I won't be letting any bloodsucker screw with your mind, kiddo!! I'll see the end of it if no one else will!_

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_[tbc]_

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_Sorry that some things took so long to finally get here. I kind of expected to reach the Yagari point of the story much sooner, but lack of time to update plus chapters being longer than I had expected made that it became so much longer. Originally, I thought we'd be here months ago. XD;;_

_Whether that 'wheel of fate' runs towards tragedy or something else, is another matter, up to your guesses for now... XD_

_The chapter title comes from "Funeral of hearts", a song by HIM (as always for CoB). :D  
Much of the lyrics for that song hint at a number of things in CoB, past and to come. *hint-hint* 8D_

_Originally, this chapter would end at "_**Thank you, Kiryuu-sama… for everything**._" And the rest would be in the next chapter, but I didn't want to cut so soon and have everybody have to wait for the next chapter, so… it doesn't cut quite at such conventional CoB spot (XD;), but oh well. Better than waiting even longer. _

_Incidentally, Kaname's weird feeling is not just a random omen. In CoB Kaname can sort of sense some upcoming dangers up to a certain point (but he doesn't knows any of the specifics), and the feeling of dread he started to feel during that night was probably born of the discussion Yagari and Ichiru were having at that same moment elsewhere in the city. That discussion created a new element of danger, and that kicked in the 'omen' feeling Kaname got. XD Kind of like when a cup breaks or whatever and you shudder, feeling that something bad is coming. XD;;  
Normally, Kaname gets that kind of thing in CoB when Zero gets hurt, as you've seen in past chapters, because of the connection they share due to Kaname's strong feelings for Zero and the hunter having given him his blood... but that connection to Zero might have made Kaname's blood somewhat attuned with what was going on with Ichiru since he's Zero's identical twin, and maybe it somehow sensed the thing with Yagari... in any case, whatever it was that happened was enough to give Kaname that feeling that something bad was coming his way. XD;;  
And as a result and with his certainty of losing Zero sooner or later fueling his preexisting fears, that new omen made him assume the worst..._

_As for Ichiru, well, I love him, but he's in the perfect position to be a sort of a villain for the fic, and so...it's convenient to use him for that. XD;;  
Canonically, he's got terribly bad sides, but also good ones, so I'm hoping to convey a bit of that in CoB too. :D_

_The next chapter should take less long to come! ^^; (...I seriously hope so, at least. XD;;)_

_And this is totally unrelated to Cob, but as she and I share a lot of the same likes in VK-related stuff and in the types of situations we like to put Kaname through, and as I'm sure readers of Cob would most likely enjoy the delicious themes used in her fic, I must absolutely recommend you Kagamichihime's fic, "_ _Blood, Ink and Ecstasy": __/s/5439620/1/Blood_Ink_and_Ecstasy (You just have to paste this onto part of the url, or search for the title in the search area of the site.)  
__It's pure delight, and Kaname and Zero are adorable in it. :D Do give it a try, I'm sure you'll love it! *hearts*_

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_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	24. The distance between us seems to grow

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 24 – "The distance between us seems to grow."**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemons from time to time.**_

_I'm so terribly sorry this update took forever. D:  
Last time, I thought it wouldn't take too long for the next chapter, but then RL deadlines and all sorts of things popped up all around and killed the fanfic-writing time and as a result the poor update. ^^;  
It took forever before I was even able to return to any fandom activities at all, not only fic writing! ^^;_

_I feel so bad for the lovely readers waiting for the fic, and also because I want to tell the story and those huge gaps between chapters really ruin the flow. ^^; Sorry!  
I'm trying to figure out a way to set aside little chunks of time here and there to write, so that hopefully updates won't be as slow as they are right now. And/or maybe I'll make shorter chapters more often instead of taking months to release larger ones. Hopefully it will work!_

_._

_**Meanwhile, here's a recap of the previous events, since the story has gotten pretty long and the slow updates for those past chapters don't help with remembering what happened before, I bet.**__** ^^;**_

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_**Previously, on "Cradle of Blood" :**_

_ A devastating long war raged between hunters and vampires. _

_The hunters came out victorious, and established their rule over a human population that was shaken by war, frightened by the knowledge such legendary horrors as vampires even existed, and all too eager to accept a government composed of people able to fight the enemy race. _

_A manicheist view of things was quick to spread, as anti-vampire propaganda did ravages to the way already distrustful people viewed the defeated race. The new status quo of the world was ruthlessly cruel, and vampires were now reduced to pleasure slaves, their preternatural beauty and unparalleled healing ability being put to use in ways they couldn't have imagined in their worst nightmares._

_Hearing already by the end of the war about what the hunters planned to do to the defeated, many vampires despaired to find a way to protect their children. Some, like the Aidou family, sent them far into the countryside, hoping without much success to avoid capture.  
Others had better means; the Kurans attempted to use an age-old secret spell to turn both of their children into humans and place them under the guard of their old friend Cross. _

_However, they were betrayed by an alliance between the conniving vampire council and the corrupt hunter association president. Informed by Rido of what the Kurans would attempt, Ichiou besieged their manor with the council army and hordes of level E's, and Rido and him interrupted the ritual before Kaname could be turned human.  
Haruka's life, already trickling away due to the ritual he'd initiated, was then used against his will to make Ichiou human instead, and Kaname fell prey to the enemy, having for only solace the knowledge that Juri was able to turn his sister human, and that he'd safely delivered Yuuki to Cross before they were overrun. _

_Ichiou's ties with the corrupt members of the Association gave him a position of power and a fake identity as a high-ranking hunter, in the brand new Association-ruled world, and Kaname was his slave for some time. But with Ichiou needing to dedicate more time to the politics of the new world, and not wanting Takuma to find out what had become of his friend Kaname, the young pureblood was soon sold to one of the 'houses', brothels where enslaved vampires were offered for rent as sex slaves.  
There, Ichiou continued to exact brutal visits on him regularly, at least once a month when not more frequently.  
Although purebloods would normally only be found in high-end establishment s and for rent at terribly high prices for a night, Kaname was shipped off to a somewhat seedy place and put for rent at the price of a level C, to ensure that hordes of customers would come harass him every night. This was Ichiou's way to ensure the young pureblood would never have peace, even away from him.  
Ichiou is in no hurry and still expects he will eventually succeed to break the pureblood's spirit and force him to commit suicide sacrificing his life to turn Takuma human, something Kaname has refused to do so far.  
It is his last bastion of resistance against Ichiou, although he is in truth far more broken than Ichiou himself actually realizes._

_But unexpectedly, the nightmare that Kaname's life had become begun to slowly change after a chance encounter with a surprisingly gentle silver-haired hunter one night… _

_And as time passed and Zero visited the 'house', the two boys found themselves getting closer and closer, Kaname unwillingly feeling the defenses of his wounded heart crumble in front of the gentleness and warmth the young hunter gave him, and Zero feeling more and more fascinated by the young pureblood, who was so terribly different from everything Zero had expected when it came to purebloods. _

_After seeing Kaname badly wounded as a result of one of Ichiou's visits, Zero could no longer think of letting go, and begun to frequent the place regularly, bringing the pureblood sweets, a chess set, books, and other things in hopes of making his life a little less hard._

_But during ten years of slavery, Kaname had only known brutality, and the few people who had been gentle to him did it solely to deceive him and break him further afterwards.  
So trusting that this hunter would be different from all the previous ones is immensely difficult for him. Inevitably, Kaname believes that Zero too is lying to him, and that all his gentleness is just an act to make him open up to him._

_Certain that Zero means to betray him and drop the mask of gentleness at some point, Kaname tries to not get attached to him, and fails. He begins to crave Zero's presence more and more, and despairs because he believes that sooner or later the worst will happen and Zero will inevitably reveal his true face and hurt him more than any other hunter before has managed to. Unlike with previous cases, Kaname has let this hunter deep into his heart and became terribly dependent on his warmth and kindness._

_Zero doesn't quite realizes the depths of his protégé's despair and fatalism, but he is determined to make Kaname see that his intentions are not like those of other hunters, no matter how long it takes and how slowly he has to approach him._

_Alas, unbeknownst to either of them, Ichiru has set in motion things that will speed up the course of everything around them…_

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_**Cradle of Blood – Chapter 24: **__**"The distance between us seems to grow.**_"  


_Warning: The chapter is rather dark, and not for the faint of heart or anyone who gets hurt by reading abuse in fiction. (Although if you're here and survived the past chapters, you're probably okay with a certain amount of Hurt/comfort and/or fictional abuse in stories… XD; )_

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The momentum with which he'd been thrust forward made the pureblood's face bounce unpleasantly against the surface of the mattress, and Kaname's eyes snapped open from the impact. He gasped in surprise and stared at the room around him, confused. He was quickly reminded that he was –unsurprisingly— in his room like every night, with yet another of the countless customers of the 'house' claiming him.

The young brunet was bent over the side of the bed with his bruised hips forced into an awkward position, his backside offered up invitingly as he was held in place in a painful grip. A heavyset man pressed himself behind him, rutting viciously into the brunet's slender body and occasionally striking the back of his head or shoving his face into the mattress for added amusement. One of those blows had just awakened him from a momentary loss of consciousness.

Thick drops of blood rolled from Kaname's nose, onto his lips and then down his chin, staining the bed sheets as they dropped down and reached their final destination. The customer had punched him earlier on, and apparently he mustn't have been unconscious for very long if he was still bleeding so rapidly.  
Not only that but he'd awoken naturally, from the surprise of his face hitting the bed, rather than waking up to the customer savagely beating him for 'daring' to pass out, which could only mean that the man hadn't noticed his victim had been unconscious for a brief moment.

The man was a middle-aged hunter, a bit on the heavy side, vulgar and not looking like he had a great financial situation either. He'd seemed absolutely marveled to find a pureblood for rent at the low price Kaname was for, and dragged the brunet to the bed with sadistic eagerness.

Kaname clenched his teeth, bracing for the continuing pain and the burning shame that each new violation brought anew, regardless of how many times it had happened over the years. He silently cursed the man with some of the nastiest epithets he knew, and mentally classified him in the category of people who liked to humiliate vampires for the sake of compensating for something they themselves lacked, either due to insufficient personal merit as a hunter or by lack of luck in making a fortune after the war.  
It wasn't merely an empty insult mentally thrown at the man to make himself feel better. The pureblood was probably accurate in his assessment. He was quite good at judging his oppressors and guessing their reasons, despite the ten years away from a normal life and the extreme lack of knowledge of the way the outside world might currently be after so many years of captivity. He knew nothing of the life outside, but he did know a lot about the personality and behavior of the people who frequented the 'house'.  
It wasn't hard to see that beyond the basest racial hatred and their need to dominate a vampire, a large number of the customers of the 'houses' used violence even for things such as venting away their frustrations. That was sadly by far not one of the sole primary reason for hunters to do what they did to him, but nevertheless it was one of the frequent reasons.

Years at the 'house' had made Kaname well acquainted with the habits of the type of people who came to 'visit' him, and in turn that made him able to figure out things based on a myriad of small little clues and reactions.

From the way his nose was still bleeding, he guessed he'd only been unconscious for a few moments, under a minute at most. Soon it would decrease and start to clot, considerably slower than it would have been if he wasn't pumped full of anti-vampire drugs blocking his powers and so much of his healing, but still faster than on a human. The sluggish leftover flow added to the clotting would then clog his nostrils and force him to breathe through parted lips, at least until he could do something about that, once the man left.  
He knew extremely well the way those things went, with how used he was to being wounded. In part, it was because he busied his mind with it to try and escape a little the horrible sensations his body was subjected to.  
He could usually predict with impressive precision how much time he may have before the clotting blood would force him to open his mouth to breathe, how long different types of wounds might incapacitate him, or how long bruises in different parts of his body would take to turn from a vivid purple-blue to a more sickening yellowish green as the days passed. If not for the drugs, bruises would have been things that should fade in minutes for someone like him. Not in days.  
But by now he'd lived so long this way that there were days he wasn't even sure he would have remembered how it felt like to have his power back.

If he was lucky, while he cleaned up to receive the next customer he might have a moment to press a cloth soaked in cold water to his nose, to try and keep the swelling down and maybe make the pain less bad for a little bit. But for now he had to focus on not further displeasing the current visitor, to avoid getting beaten up more.

Each customer was a little different from the others, and while some were in it just for the physical sensations themselves, others had little extra quirks that needed catering to also, in order to avoid angering them further. Some liked the sound of the brunet's voice when they made him scream. Others liked the way his pale skin bruised so easily, be it under their blows or even simply from the brutal way they griped his hips and legs, or pressed their hungry fingers and nails forcefully onto each delicate spot of his wounded body. His pale creamy skin was like a canvas upon which they liked to paint with their blows, leaving it flushed and bruised with varying degrees of violence, scrapes and cuts drawing the outline of their cruelty.

A great many of them wanted to see his tears, or at least to hear his voice breaking to the point where it sounded like he was sobbing. To have a pureblood of all things, being so broken down at your feet, was the greatest thrill possible for a large number of the 'house's customers, whether they were low rank hunters who came to brothels to play out a fantasy they could never see fulfilled in a battlefield, or simple sadists who enjoyed seeing what once was the proudest and most untouchable rank of the vampire race reduced to a quivering mass of pain and shame, forced into submission by sheer brutally and the knowledge of the indescribable horrors that awaited any slave daring to disobey a customer, especially if said customer was a hunter and not just any random human.

In days where Kaname could avoid it, he did all he could to not cry. It was too ingrained in him from his pureblood upbringing that tears were forbidden, and while he seemed mortifyingly unable to hold said tears back whenever they decided to spill of their own will for Kiryuu-sama, he was still adamant about not crying in front of just about any customer, or at least trying not to as much as he could.  
But he'd been far too abused to retain what pride he once had, and as such he wasn't above simulating the crying sounds he knew they wanted to hear, if it could save him from an extra beating. There were days where the line was so blurry that he didn't immediately know whether he was just faking it or whether he'd failed and was sobbing earnestly.  
Years before, he would have liked better to die than to give in like this, but since those days he'd painfully learned that there were a number of things that could be worse than death, if you had the misfortune to live long enough to experience it.

And then there were always the customers who were so skilled at their brutality that they managed to force out of him even the tears he so desperately wished to conceal.

But luckily the man currently abusing him was neither very skilled or too perceptive, and after a few more thrusts and some exaggerated sobbing noises from Kaname –who was pressing his face to the bed for emphasis and to hide the fact he wasn't truly crying, the man climaxed, shooting his detestable fluids into his victim and pulling out with a look of victorious satisfaction on his pig-like face.

The pureblood may have been faking the tears but he was sincerely feeling miserable from utter shame and the very real pain threatening to split him in two with each brutal thrust. Even now that the man left him, it radiated from that area like a throbbing agony that not even years of enduring suffering could prepare someone to accept or to get used to.

Kaname shook with disgust and kept his face pressed to the mattress, now not only for the sake of maintaining the appearances that he might or might not be crying, but also because he did feel genuinely at his lowest. Ironically, those moments were far more likely to push him into tears than the blows or the physical pain ever could. If not for the young pureblood's remarkable self-control and inner-strength, he should have lost it and broken down completely many years ago.

At least while the customers were in the process of ramming themselves into him, the pain shooting through his body and the danger of all that might still happen could still distract him from the worst part of his own thoughts, at least for a short time. But the moment the men went away and the danger abated for a brief moment, he was left bloodied and humiliatingly marked by them, feeling like something worse than a soiled rag or a discarded condom, more empty and worthless than ever.

He felt a little more irreparably tainted with each violation and each man who emptied themselves within him, disposing of their disgusting release and twisted fantasies of cruelty and pain inside his already much too abused body.

When it came to causing pain, what the current customer had lacked in finesse, he made up for in corpulence. The pureblood's thighs were still shaking from how thoroughly he'd been claimed, and fresh blood was still running between his legs. No one bothered preparing a slave for penetration, and Kaname was naturally very slender and _extremely_ tight there, much to the sadistic delight of his brutal visitors. His vampire healing would always restore him to the way nature had intended him to be, as it was with all purebloods, and as such, it hurt very much like losing his virginity all over again each night, especially when it came to the first few customers of each night. He never had enough time to fully heal back all the way since that would have taken days at the very least because of the drugs, but it was close enough to the same amount of pain. Although mentally, it was still countless times less scarring than when he had actually lost his first time to Ichiou, all those years ago.

Horrible as those customers may be, deep inside Kaname was glad each time that it was some random man that came into his room, and not Ichiou.

Ichiou was so much worse. Physically and mentally. Over the years, his monthly visits to the 'house' had become something Kaname dreaded so much that if he could he would have gladly chosen to take on several of the more sadistic group jobs where several people tortured him at once for a whole night, rather than have to go through one of the ex-councilmember's visits, even if it was just once a month. _Torture was nothing compared to things Ichiou could do to his mind and body._

The brunet shuddered, wondering if perhaps the feeling of dread he'd been having since the previous day, might maybe not be just Kiryuu-sama inevitably tiring of him some time soon, but if it meant that Ichiou would come for him again soon.

Perhaps even _immediately_ after Kiryuu-sama also turned against him, since that too was bound to happen sooner than later. _With my luck it wouldn't be surprising at all…_

He trembled with horror at the idea, misery filling his shivering body even more deeply.

The slaves had no access to calendars or anything of the such since they were supposed to be 'beasts' and not sentient beings, as per the handlers views and the society's rules, but normally Kaname tried to secretly peek from time to time at the large numbers on the calendar on the wall at the check-in area, in an attempt to keep track of how many days had passed from a month to the other. His life had gone downhill so far that he was completely uncertain of how many years exactly he'd been in slavery, but he tried to count the days between Ichiou's visits, if anything so that he could have an idea of when a new visit was most likely to happen, even if that system was very flawed since the old man sometimes came several times in a same month, if he was less busy around that time. Sometimes the visits were delayed when Ichiou's was very busy, although that was a _very_ rare respite.  
But this past month, Kaname had been lucky enough to be left alone by Ichiou, and he was distracted with the bliss of Zero's visits. He realized now with dread that he'd lost track of the days several times, and wasn't quite sure if a whole month had passed or if it had been even more time than that.

If anything, the fact Kaname still managed to count at all, -much less keep track of time passing despite how often he found himself wounded, unconscious, or even unsure of whether it was day or night, after a particularly hard night of work— was amazing in itself. But that thought did nothing to cheer up the pureblood as he lay breathing shallowly on the soiled bed, listening to the sounds of the customer leaving and dreading the idea that anytime now, his already bleak life might take a turn for the far worse, or quite possibly for the very worst.

.

.

Elsewhere in the city, in the heart of the flourishing Hunter capital and far from the darkness of the _blood district_, Zero was sitting at his desk in the HA headquarters, trying to focus on the pile of paperwork in front of him, which had magically sprung out of nowhere, so to speak, moments before he was supposed to leave. An urgent and terribly time-consuming assignment, that he had to finish that same night, had been brought in right as he was practically counting the minutes to leave and go see Kaname.

He cursed the inconvenience of his bad luck in springing that on him right there and then, when he was looking forward to seeing the pureblood so much… but he knew that the worse part of it was by far not that he had to wait, but that Kaname might be facing quite a number of customers before he got there. The mere thought of it infuriated the hunter, regardless of him knowing it was an everyday reality he couldn't prevent. With each day that passed, Zero felt more and more compelled to somehow be at the 'house' at all times to shield the graceful brunet from this horror, even though he knew it was impossible.

Or, at the very least, the second best option: to be there as often and as long as he could, especially during the earlier hours of the night when the flow of customers was at its worst.

But from the look of it, it wouldn't be possible that night. He would be very lucky if he could finish that paperwork and still have time to go to the 'house' at all, even very briefly. The more he sifted through the papers, the more he realized it was highly unlikely he would be able to finish and still visit Kaname that night after all.

He'd even tried asking if any of his colleagues from the later shift could take this job instead, but the paperwork was specifically assigned to him, so there was no going around it. It was almost as if the delivery had been perfectly timed right then just to get in his way, preventing him from leaving on time. Of course, that couldn't be possible since it had came straight from the HA higher levels and his superiors didn't know or care what he planned to do after work, but it was nevertheless extremely ill-timed. And more so since he couldn't see why they would absolutely need that paperwork done today rather than any other day. It was absolutely undeserving of the 'urgent' tag attached to it. He might have to pull an all-nighter for completely pointless work.

The young hunter sighed, cursing his luck, and immersed himself in his work.

.

Fate was a strange thing, and oft times horribly brutal. Mythological Mistress of men and gods alike, kind benefactor to the most unexpected people, and violent tormenter to those it seemed to frown upon, whether or not it had a valid reason to do so.

At times, Kaname thought his very birth was the reason why fate seemed to be so obstinate in crushing him down, but then, that might be because of the way the brutal training he'd received at the 'house' had conditioned him to believe his existence was sinful, and contributed to shape the vision he had of that already bleak world. When you spend ten years hearing about how you and your entire race are the lowest scum in the world, it's impossible to escape the thought, repulsive as it may be. The worst lie starts sounding like the truth if it's repeated often enough, especially with cruel beatings to support it.

_It was his own doing if he got destroyed this way. He knew that day would be coming, and he still opened up to Kiryuu-sama. Now, only the future could tell what would come to pass._

The pureblood shuddered, not sure whether he should focus on the anger he felt towards himself, or on the impossible yearning he knew well he couldn't ignore any more now than he could weeks ago, back when he still clung to the idea that it might not be as deep as he feared. Now he knew well that however destructive his need for Kiryuu-sama may be, there was no avoiding it.

'_Thanks for everything' was certainly not the three little words you truly wished to tell him that night…_

Kaname stared at the wall, lost in thought for the nth time since that night when their lips had almost brushed.

_Such an impossible wish! So little to yearn for if he'd been human, yet so impossible for him..._

The dreadful sensation of inevitable destruction being imminent swirled inside him again, threatening to swallow his sanity for good. He'd been having that feeling for a while now, but it was only getting worse.

The pureblood's current state of heightened anxiety was for a large part caused by weariness and pain, and not only by his ominous thoughts, but the utter despondency brought about by the certainty that some sort of unspecified doom was imminent didn't help in the least when his body was already being pushed so far on such a constant basis. He was tethering on the brink of breaking down crying from utter despair or passing out from extreme exhaustion, and his weakened body warred with difficulty between those contradictory extremes.

His eyes glazed over, and he forced himself to shake out of the drowsy stupor that his current state of exhaustion was throwing him in.

After the previous customer left the young pureblood had showered fast and changed the bed sheets. He was now lost in thought while sitting down on the very edge of a corner of the bed, trying his best not to make any creases on the fresh bed sheets while he attempted to recoup a little before the next customer finished the check-in procedure and came in. He hoped with all his heart that his Kiryuu-sama would come, but the night had started with no sign of the hunter, and that odd feeling churning in Kaname's gut whispered horrifying ideas to his mind and made him even more desperate with each minute that passed.

Each additional moment of the silver-haired hunter not showing up seemed to confirm Kaname's fears that the man would abandon him or destroy what was left of his heart with his own hands. Probably both, right as fate mocked him and his growing despair.

Focusing and thinking straight were proving to be especially difficult tonight.

At least he'd managed to stop the bleeding from his nose and from _elsewhere_, he thought groggily. He'd been bleeding earlier from a rather intimate area, 'courtesy' of the brutality of the various previous customers that night, and he'd luckily managed to stop the bleeding without staining the fresh sheets. He wouldn't have the time to change the bed again before someone came in, and that would just get him beaten more. He shifted a little, noticing he'd been zoning out again from tiredness and from feeling sore.

He rubbed tired fingers absentmindedly over the thick leather of the slave collar he wore at all times. It had a second layer looping all around the collar and buckling shut at the front, with a flap clasped over the buckle and decorated with the logo of the house he belonged too. Around the collar, D-rings were attached on four points, to secure a leash, ropes or chains, depending on the passing moods of anyone renting the slaves.

There were similar rings on the shackles on his wrists and ankles, matching the larger ones on the frame of his bed and on the four tall posts of it. All of the rooms were equipped that way, so that the slaves would always be ready for any customers who felt like chaining them during the act, or who were into other kinks such as suspension bondage or similar practices.  
There were other various points to attach ropes or chains all around the bed, more or less hidden for the sake of respecting the classic aesthetic of the furniture, but still quite easy to find if a customer felt in the mood for that. It was standard in most 'houses', even though much of the furniture was antiques taken from the pillaged vampire mansions; they modified and reinforced even the weaker beds to support the most extreme activities without risk of breaking.  
On the bedside table, there was an assortment of leather ropes and various bondage restraints, ready at hand at all times if the customers so wished. An even larger assortment was a short distance away in a drawer, for whoever felt like it.

As a result there was always something like that within the slaves' field of vision, like a constant reminder of what they could be subjected to at any time a customer so wished.  
The sight of those things or of the little metal loops and rings on the bed or on the restraints always sent a shudder of disgust and quickly concealed fear through Kaname. He had _way_ too many memories of hanging from those loops, spread eagled or suspended in a variety of ways, either simply for his humiliation, or often to be whipped or worse. _It was bad enough when it was a single customer doing it, but sometimes it was groups, and then it only got worse and worse… _

He pulled his mind out of the sickening memories and tried to shake out of his drowsiness to focus on what may lie ahead. A new customer would come soon, and he'd better not be zoning out like this by then. He had to be alert and responsive enough if he didn't want to risk more beatings tonight. Well, ones that he might be able to avoid, at least. _With most of the cases, there was nothing that could be done to avoid it anyway._

He slid his fingers sluggishly along the edge of the collar, trying to keep himself awake, hissing softly and wincing when he accidentally caused the collar to shift a little over the raw skin of his neck. Slave collars had a layer over the lining on the inside, composed of a multitude of tiny metal pins side by side, short and close enough to each other that it was almost like a sharp netting. They weren't quite long enough to cause serious damage –no one wanted to cause the _merchandise_to be unable to work—but were definitely pointy enough to be both extremely uncomfortable at all times and a rough and irritating presence constantly scraping viciously the extremely sensitive skin of the vampires' necks, providing not only pain to a particularly erogenous zone of their bodies but also yet another permanent reminder of their appalling condition.

The first times Kaname had had the collar fitted when he was younger, he thought he'd lose his mind just from the urge to tear it off, or from the constant burning pain of his sensitive skin tearing open over and over under the cruel bite of the thousands of needle-like pins in the lining… but then, very quickly the young pureblood had far worse things threatening his sanity, to the point that that pain and discomfort caused by the collar quickly became secondary.

But even after years of being used to it, the thing was still uncomfortably painful. It was maddening even when you stayed still, but when you did move, it was constant pain. The collar shifted with each movement, the metal biting into the skin, especially if a leash was used and a customer pulled on it suddenly, causing the lining to tear at the slave's neck with each movement. The thing was carefully fitted so that the needles scrapped without piercing too deep for significant damage, but it was nearly unbearable until you got used to the permanent nagging pain.

There was no more constant reminder of what they were, than the rough spiked lining of the collar bruising the skin of what was one of the most delicate areas of a vampire's body, metal tips embedding into the skin with each sudden jerk from the leash. And because the collars were locked and could only be opened with a special key, there was no hope of possibly ever removing them without permission or loosening them to reduce the scraping of the pins on the skin. Even if it had been possible during cleaning, a handler was bound to notice and terrible punishment would ensue.

On cleaning days, and on the very rare occasions where a handler didn't immediately close and lock the contraption after cleaning, if they left Kaname by himself in the bathroom for a moment while inspecting the room and if the young pureblood thought he'd be alone for enough time to not risk being caught, he'd quickly step closer to the mirror to survey the damage. It was a strange feeling, as he'd grown so used to having that thing around his neck that removing it made him feel truly naked, even though he was already made to be mostly naked at all times anyway.

His neck was permanently bruised, the delicate skin chafed and scraped all over, a messy net of tiny cuts and scarred skin all around his neck, tiny scabs reopening with each movement, making him wonder if his neck would ever be able to look normal again even if he didn't have to wear a collar anymore and had enough time to heal. In theory, his body should regenerate the area if given enough time, but… of course, was a ridiculous thought, and the foolish idea reminded him inevitably of the danger he put himself in each time he took a chance to quickly remove the collar to look at his wounds.

Over the years, he'd grown so despondent about such matters that he no longer even had the energy to bother removing it to see the damage, and would simply lay back against the bathroom wall and wait until the handler in charge of the cleaning inspection came back with the key to lock the collar.

Considering that the neck was one of a vampire's erogenous zones, and extremely sensitive, those collars were particularly cruel… but then, that was what they were designed for. That was the very reason why hunters had decided that their slaves would wear such a thing at all times: because they knew well how much worse that would be for vampires than a mere collar with a normal lining, and because it would function not only as a restraint and a symbol of their defeat, but also as an additional constant reminder of their situation, one more layer of humiliation to crush the enemy's morale more completely.

Those thought weren't going anywhere constructive. Kaname sighed, leaning his forehead against the bedpost next to him, his gaze lost on the old floor boards, despair and exhaustion mixing in his eyes. But he didn't have the time to think much of anything, as he heard footsteps approaching his door and got up quickly, fixing as well as he could whatever creases he might have made on the bed.

The customer turned out to be a dark haired man with a studded leather eyepatch covering part of his stern face. He entered the room with a presence and gait that spoke of the intense distrust he had for the now-enslaved race, and of the years of experience he must have as a hunter.  
The sneer on his face was not like the ones so many of the younger hunters sported, which displayed disgust for the slaves but also an obvious amusement in the situation at hand –no, this hunter's aura was different, and showed nothing but true anger as he approached.

Kaname lowered his head, emphasizing the posture of submission he'd perfected over the years, a carefully crafted mask to protect him from the ire of his customers.

But when he glanced up briefly and met the raw fury in the hunter's single eye, the young pureblood faltered visibly, suddenly very unsure that any of the masks he normally wore had any chance to protect him tonight. The brunet's heart sped up, pounding hard in his ribcage. His every sense screamed danger at him.

The man's voice was deep and firm, and somehow conveyed just as much hatred and anger as his gaze had.

"My name is Touga Yagari, vampire scum. Have you ever heard it before? From a certain customer of yours, perhaps?"

For all the years of experience Kaname had in analyzing his many customers' reasons and motives, he could not fathom an explanation for the very visible fury emanating from this unknown hunter, and the incomprehension filled him with even more dread, pushing him close to panic.

.

.

.

_[tbc]_

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


	25. A lie Into the sweetest truth…

_**Title: Cradle of Blood – chapter 25 – "A lie Into the sweetest truth… "**_

_**Pairings: Zero x Kaname.**__ Some Kaname x Zero also, and a few secondary pairings.  
__**Warnings: AU. Sex slavery**__, prostitution, mature themes and __**lemon stuff from time to time.**_

* * *

_When I updated with chapter 24, I thought I'd be able to post chapter 25 less than a month after 24… ORZ  
Sorry that I'm only updating now, 6 months later. O_o It horrifies me how long it's taken between chapters of this fic sometimes. So sorry, lovely readers! ;_;  
(At least this time it wasn't as bad as the time I took what, 2 years to update? ORZ *crawls under a rock*)_

_Thank you so, SO MUCH for still reading/sticking around despite the delays, and thank you so much for all your wonderful reviews and PMs and encouragements!  
You are all so wonderful! I appreciate so much every single word/review/encouragement/etc. you send! And I'm also so sorry that I didn't get to reply in so long. ^^;; But getting to read what you all write really makes me so happy and gives me so much energy to go on writing the story~! :D  
_

_RL has been all over the place and I didn't get to write or draw anything fandom in so long. T^T I had a lot of the chapter done back 6 months ago already, but then things got in the way of me writing etc.  
But hopefully the next update will take less long! _

_CoB is **finally** nearing an important point for the plot, which it should have reached a long time ago if the slow updating hadn't delayed it all for so long. ^^;_

_Hopefully this chapter might make up a little for the wait, both in length and in content. ^^_

_This behemoth of a chapter is __**three times **__as big as a normal CoB chapter, and about __**six times**__ the size of one of the shorter chapters. ^^;  
I was tempted to cut it into two or three chapters but it would just have slowed the plot even more and would have interrupted it possibly at an awkward place, so it had to be crazy long. It's an important chapter for them all._

._**  
**_

_**Warning**__**:**__ Some parts of the chapter are pretty dark. If that's a problem for you, you might want to skip bits of it as you progress through it. Although if you're a reader of this fic and survived the previous 24 chapters, you probably will be fine… ^^;  
_

_Sorry if sometimes this story is terribly dark, but remember, the darkest nights still give way to the hopeful dawn. ;D And that dawn is made all the more lovely by how dark the night was. So one can always hope there could be some light at the end of any tunnel… even if only the future can tell what that light may be. ^^  
*cough* Hopefully not a train. XD *cough*XD;; *is shot*_

_Also just in case due to the chapter, uhm, I don't hate Yagari or anything. ^^; (I don't hate any of the VK characters.)  
I really like him, but the poor thing just happens to be the master/parental figure worried about Zero and assuming the worst about vampires, and thus he fits the inevitable role for this situation in the fic, especially considering the society they live in, in this AU. And the way he is in the manga only makes him even more useful for this kind of role in fics. ^^;  
But he's not doing anything for the twisted reasons the people at the 'house' would be doing it for, he's gone there because of misguided beliefs and thinking he's looking out for Zero._

* * *

_.  
_

_._

_._

_When he glanced up briefly and met the raw fury in the hunter's single eye, the young pureblood faltered visibly, suddenly very unsure that any of the masks he normally wore had any chance to protect him tonight. The brunet's heart sped up, pounding hard in his ribcage. His every sense screamed danger at him._

_The man's voice was deep and firm, and somehow conveyed just as much hatred and anger as his gaze had._

_"My name is Touga Yagari, vampire scum. Have you ever heard it before? From a certain customer of yours, perhaps?"_

_For all the years of experience Kaname had in analyzing his many customers' reasons and motives, he could not fathom an explanation for the very visible fury emanating from this unknown hunter, and the incomprehension filled him with even more dread, pushing him close to panic._

Yagari steps were heavy on the floor of the bedroom, his boots clacking on the wood boards with an ominous sound as he drew closer to the brunet pureblood.

"Oh, that name has no meaning for you?" Sarcasm practically dripped from the old hunter's voice, and he continued in a snarl, "...How about another name then. Zero Kiryuu? How about you tell me about him then, huh?"

_Oh..._

Kaname froze on the spot, his eyes open suddenly so wide that it made them seem unnaturally big for a moment, making him appear even younger than he was.

_So that time has come as I feared... _

_Kiryuu-sama has finally decided to throw me to the wolves._

A wave of something akin to acid rushed through the young pureblood's body, making him feel half-frozen and numb as if his body was no longer of this world, and yet so utterly broken inside that not even death could possibly justify so much pain.

_Somehow... I had hoped I might be given a few more weeks... or even just a few more days. I thought... I thought... we had some sort of thing going on, something that might make him wait... a little while longer... before...before he..._

The pureblood's fingers were shaking, but he didn't seem to notice. His heart ached so bad it felt like it might actually shatter for real, not merely metaphorically but actually burst in his chest somehow, like crystal that's been pushed too far and finally crumbles to pieces. He backed away unconsciously, his steps faltering and taking him closer to the bed once more, until the mattress pressed against the back of his knees, stopping his teetering retreat.

_But then, even if Kiryuu-sama had waited I would just have wanted more time with him. I would always have hoped for one more day, one more minute. Grasping for another instant of mercy, another instant of his impossibly unreal gentleness, day after day. _

The one-eyed hunter drew closer to him with a rapid stride, but Kaname remained frozen in place as if he couldn't see the man, unable to say or do anything even though his rational side reeled from all his survival instincts screaming at him that now was the time to do something, deny the potential accusations, put up a facade of innocence or seductive submission, or simply do something, anything, whatever it may be, to distract the hunter and hopefully delay or extenuate what would be ineluctably coming for him.

But whatever reason may say, right about now his heart didn't even have the energy of trying to fight the inevitable anymore.

_I knew this day would come no matter what, and yet... yet... now that it's happening it feels like nothing I could ever have done to prepare for it would ever have made any difference, not even for one brief second._

Yagari's callused fingers gripped the pureblood's arm roughly, his other hand going for the brunet's chin, forcing the boy's face up, wanting to get a better look at him. The hunter towered over the slender vampire, several inches taller than him. Kaname looked up as the hunter expected, but his eyes were glazed over and Yagari saw nothing within that broken gaze but fatalistic surrender filled with death and desolation.

Someone less blasé might have backed away from the sheer power of the utter despondency emanating from the brunet, but Yagari's heart was hardened beyond belief by years on the hunt, and it blinded him to the sincerity of Kaname's plight.

"You don't fool me, bloodsucker. You're all the same guilty bunch, but you'll talk. One way or another."

Kaname's knees were barely holding him up under the weight of his emotional distress, but it seemed almost unnatural how easily Yagari tumbled the brunet backwards, onto the bed. The impression was also enhanced by the fact vampires had deceptively lighter bodies than humans, and Kaname's life in captivity hadn't done him any favors when it came to muscle mass or bulk development. He would naturally have had a slender and graceful build no matter what, but he was several inches shorter and even more slim than he would normally have been if he had gotten to grow up and mature in a healthy environment and not stumped by brutality, starvation and anti-vampire drugs.

The brunet's slender body fell back and splayed on the bed like a ragdoll, giving Yagari the feeling the boy was light like a feather in the wind. A willowy child, rather than an enemy on the battlefield.

But while such a realization might have cooled down the hunter's impetus in another situation, or if his prisoner had been someone else, it only irritated him in the current one. This was not a human boy or an innocent victim in any way. The vampire's visible fragility didn't strike Yagari as something innocent, but as a tool for deceit instead, and it drove further into his mind the thought that Kaname was a manipulative and cunning beast who was most definitely using its wily charm and appearance to take advantage of Zero. _Otherwise why would the fiend so quickly have gone from behaving like any normal slave, to suddenly looking so utterly more broken and despondent than an instant earlier, even before he'd stated his intentions or any torture had even begun?_ Yagari was sure it couldn't possibly be a natural reaction from someone not knowing what to expect. The pureblood had to be guilty if he was reacting like he had been expecting this anger.

_Don't let that animal play its mind tricks on you. He may not have his powers but everything about those beasts is geared towards lying and deceiving. They will sneak into people's minds and hearts and tear them apart from the inside if you let them. That filthy, conniving little blood-sucker! Don't let his wiles trick you!_

With such thoughts in mind, the hunter climbed onto on the bed rashly, grabbing the pureblood's wrists and forcefully dragging him higher on the mattress so that they weren't as close to the edge anymore. Kaname stayed limp and let himself be dragged pliantly, but in a small, survival-geared instinctive spot still functioning somewhere deep inside the recesses of his mind, the brunet was starting to regain his senses. The initial shock of realizing that his precious savior must be about to put an end to everything he'd come to look forward to in his daily life had nearly floored him, but he knew he had to survive this too, like he survived the previous hurdles life had thrown his way. It would be horrible, and in his heart he wasn't quite sure how or even if he could truly get through this shock, but his rational side told him to brace for the storm or succumb helplessly. _It's always been like this, you break apart then pick yourself back up and get up again. You can patch the pieces together more or less, but only if you survive the impact first. What matters is that you must keep going. Keep surviving no matter what they do to you._

It didn't mean that Kaname would be able to do much if anything at all to prevent whatever might be coming -after all refusing to obey was a sure method for a slave to get into a far worse world of trouble. But it did mean that a small part of his mind that wasn't still busy racing into mad panic at the thought of Zero coming to break him, was now trying to prepare for at least trying to minimize the worst. Even if it was too late to close his heart to the silver-haired man now that he'd shed all his barriers and defenses and let him in so deep inside his heart. At least he could try to freeze whatever was left of himself and his feelings, and hope Kiryuu-sama would leave some shards still in place once he would be done crushing him.

Kaname was lost in such thoughts and seemed almost catatonic when Yagari stared him down. Their faces were inches apart when the hunter decided to offer the boy at least one last merciful way out before going further.

"You can save yourself a lot of misery and pain if you don't try to play your fucked-up games with me. I'm not altogether cruel or unsympathetic. I see the life you lot live these days. I can even sort of understand that someone in such a situation might get the urge to take advantage of anything or anyone to make it less bad. What I can't accept is the method you've decided to use, and the person you've picked." The hunter's expression had hardened again by the end of the sentence, and his voice was harsh and sharp like a blade when he continued.  
"So I'll spare your bloodsucking hide, but only if you put an end to this farce right now. All you have to do is confess and answer my questions truthfully. Start by telling me what Zero and you were doing all this time, and you just might avoid getting tortured within an inch of your miserable life. But lie to me again just one time and I swear, you'll be lucky if you get out of this still alive. I am a senior hunter, I can put a bullet in your head right now and not even have to pay the bloody fucking fee for your carcass's value. I can torture you all night long and not have to pay for anything or do anything more than mention it was a Hunter Association investigation. But you don't have to suffer through this all. All you have to do is tell me the truth, and you'll be just fine. I'm giving you the choice between getting away scot-free or suffering so much pain that you'll be begging me for that bullet by the end of the night. So, what do you say?"

If the hunter's words were meant to reassure the pureblood into thinking he might get away with less punishment if he confessed, they had the opposite effect, and not only because of the horror promised by Yagari's threats.

Kaname's racing mind went from maximum alert level to nearly full blown panic. He'd been played before, and cruelly so. People had done exactly this kind of thing, given him the impression they were different and less disposed to inflict pain or suffering, then later they would send in accomplices to torture him and question him, to see how far they could fool him or push things before it became obvious they were just playing cruel games with him and that everything was pre-arranged.  
He'd long expected that sooner or later his Kiryuu-sama too, would do the same thing to him, one way or another. And now Yagari's questions fit too well with the past incidents and further cemented the brunet's belief that his fears were confirmed. As a result, the hunter's threats didn't feel like something dangled in front of his face as a mere mention of what would happen if he didn't talk, or even as any actual possibility of choice, but as a ruthless promise of something that would be done to him no matter how hard he tried to avoid it.

The brunet's breath hitched in his throat and he turned whiter than the sheets they were laying on. Rather than answering the question, or even looking like he might be considering it, the brunet stared at the hunter with a horror-filled gaze, his lips drawn into a thin line as if afraid of saying the wrong thing and making it all even worse. He'd been scared before, but this was on a whole other level.

And while it was only natural that he would react that way, unwittingly his despair only made things even worse.

Like a quid pro quo of misunderstandings feeding one another, there was now no trace of doubt left in Yagari's mind that this reaction was as clear a confession as any. The hunter practically growled in his throat. _This pureblood whore knew exactly who he was talking about, and visibly didn't have a clean conscience or he wouldn't be so afraid._

Yagari seethed with the realization, furious to see how clearly his worries were confirmed. Now he was even more certain that he needed to find out exactly what this beast had been doing with Zero. He didn't for one moment believe the vampire would be this afraid if he'd just slightly attempted to seduce or manipulate Zero a little like Yagari originally thought might be the case. If it had been just that, there would be no actual clear proof of anything, and thus no way to be sure of how far it all went. So the pureblood wouldn't really have to fear that much more than the usual level of mistreatment vampires already normally endured. He had to have succeeded at his plan quite a bit, had to have achieved some pretty significant result, something concrete and likely to be found out, to be this deadly scared of retribution. _What did you do to Zero, bloodsucker? Or what did you make him do that makes you so afraid I'll find out? You should be jumping all over the chance to give me some bullshit confession to try and escape most of the torture, but you're clamping up and looking scared shitless instead. What did you do to Zero?_

All thoughts of mercy or of hesitation long gone, Yagari got down to business quickly, a cold fury reverberating in his dark gaze.  
He pinned the pureblood down onto the bed hard, not bothering to tell him what he wanted, just reaching for the bondage restraints on the bedside table and fastening them roughly to the D-rings on the vampire's collar and wrist shackles. The hunter wasn't even done attaching them before his eye was already roaming the frame of the bed and quickly finding the corresponding rings on it, which the 'house' set up all around the bed to secure the slaves to the furniture for the sake of the customers who were into that.

Yagari pulled Kaname's arms open to bring his shackled wrists closer to the sides of the wide four-post bed, then fastened the other end of the leather ropes to the rings attached to the wooden frame supporting the mattress, before tugging at the whole thing for a bit to make sure that the pureblood's upper body was mostly immobilized. Kaname could still move his arms a bit, but not more than a few inches if he tugged at the restraints, so he couldn't go far on the bed, just writhe around at most.  
The rings around the brunet's collar were now also attached to other ropes, and the hunter fastened those too to the edge of the bed, not so much to prevent the pureblood from moving his head, but to limit the range of his movements so that Kaname could only move his head around but not try to lift his shoulders very far off the mattress. The tension on the ropes increased the pressure of the pins on the inner lining of the collar, the way leashes and any sort of restraint always did, reawakening more harshly the ever-present pain from the neck wounds all slaves sported, as well as creating an increased pressure on Kaname's windpipe that made his breathing more uncomfortable.

The brunet's shaky breaths had sped up even more with the higher layer of apprehension he always felt whenever he found himself restrained.  
Having his arms free wouldn't have changed anything concrete since there was no way he could physically resist the customers with the anti-vampire drugs weakening him so badly, not to mention that even if he had been able to, daring to resist would be unforgivable at their eyes. But for some reason having his arms and legs free made it feel slightly less bad. Maybe it was because when he wasn't restrained he felt a little like he was still in control of his own body; if anything at least to try and control his reactions better, in hopes of hiding some of his pain and fear from the tormentors' eyes.  
Whenever people tied him up, spread wide open and exposed, he felt so utterly lost under their gaze that it was as if they could rip him open and stare at his very soul, taking from him what little he had left: the chance to hide a small part of the bottomless vulnerability that tore at him. Some things were so deeply ingrained for purebloods that not even years of slavery could silence the survival instincts telling him to hide the pain and fear least he be immediately taken as prey by countless sharks around him. Vulnerability was lethal, it must be hidden at any cost. And those pureblood instincts weren't truly off-mark even now; after all, the fact the customers of the 'house' had no use for his blood and wouldn't have viewed him quite the way members of the vampire society would have didn't change the fact that he was nothing more than prey for them too, one way or another. They wouldn't drink his blood, but they craved just as much seeing him at their mercy, broken, humiliated and dreadfully vulnerable.

And all things considered, the way the current world treated the vampires was just another way of devouring someone, one that didn't kill someone instantly but instead tore their soul and body apart little bit by little bit over the years and years of abuse.

Kaname tried to escape those dark thoughts and calm down by focusing on the meager solace that came from knowing that at least, whatever time this man spent torturing him would be delaying the inevitable moment when Kiryuu-sama would join in and everything would be so much worse. Thinking about it again only made it worse though, and he had to swallow a strangled little noise of misery much akin to a sob, that threatened to escape his lips at the thought of that inevitable moment. _If you'll destroy me anyway, maybe you should just get it over with already rather than making me wait. Although I don't think I have the strength to wish for that moment to come, not even if it's in order for it to be over faster._

If Yagari heard the little choked noise, he didn't let on. The hunter was busy rummaging through the assortment of things in the bedside drawer, looking in disgust at the ones that were obscenely shaped or just plain visibly more sexually oriented than what he would have preferred to use as more straightforward interrogation tools. He'd brought an assortment of knives, but he wanted to be discreet about this whole business depending on what he might find out, to avoid causing problems for Zero, and so he didn't want to open an investigation or anything official just yet. He didn't frequent 'houses' and thus wasn't aware of how extremely common it was for other hunters to use all sort of brought-in torture implements on slaves anyway, without it arousing any suspicion of ulterior motive or anything beyond a requirement to pay for the 'repair costs'. As such, he proceeded with his plan. He would start with whatever tools the 'house' had and move on to his trusty knives later in the night, depending how the vampire reacted and how quickly his tongue loosened. He hadn't lied in his threats, he was ready to cut him open and tear him to pieces if need be, but he had vast experience in interrogations and he still thought there was a chance that the boy might end up talking sooner rather than later. And besides, there was no hurry after all since he'd made sure Zero would be stuck at the headquarters and unable to visit the wretched 'house' for at least one night.

Yagari finally made his choice, tightening his fist around the massive handle of a heavy cat-o'-nine-tails style whip, much bigger than the normal variety. He sized it up, testing its weight before getting back onto the bed, sliding between the pureblood's legs. _This will do for starters. _  
It was definitely a heavier model, quite similar to the ones found at the Association, and clearly suited for a prisoner's severe whipping or worse, rather than for bedroom play. But then, that was generally the norm for the tools used on the slaves. No one in the current society would have had any interest in using the softcore S&M tools human bondage practitioners might have employed on each other. The vampires' advanced healing and their abject status in society made that people wouldn't even think of using anything on them that wasn't meant for actual torture.

Instinctively, Kaname pulled his legs closer together as if he could possibly just hold them shut and keep himself safer, then cursed himself inwardly when the hunter leaning over him saw the little gesture and laughed visibly. _So obvious… Might as well tell the enemy what he feared in particular!  
_The young pureblood hated himself for that weakness he couldn't avoid, for the easily predictable reactions that the years of trauma had made him unable to control or conceal.

In those moments, when Kaname heard his own heart hammering so loudly that he thought it might leap out of his chest, he irrationally feared that others could hear it too, and that it told them exactly how frightened he was, despite how badly he tried over and over to not let the fear show on his face. But he couldn't stop the little beads of sweat forming on his forehead, or the agitated trembling rippling over his flushed skin in small waves of shivers, racking his body from head to toe at irregular intervals, growing worse when any of the customers brushed his skin. He _hated_ how good his body was at betraying his feelings. He may be skilled at wearing masks to protect himself, but the trauma also left him at a huge disadvantage in moments where it felt like he was losing his balance even more than usual. Years of abuse had made him even more vulnerable and openly broken, rather than strengthening him, and he hated what he viewed as an unforgivable weakness, as something revealing his worst fears to the enemies, laying him bare, for them to see not only his body but the recesses of his mind, letting them know exactly what to do to get such reactions of him and hurt him more deeply than mere blows could.  
Every flinch, every shiver, every drop of cold sweat, and Kaname hated himself a little more, for all that he was now, and all that he should have been but that he knew was now well beyond his grasp. All the majesty, power and strength he knew he would have had if he hadn't grown up enslaved. If he wasn't reduced to the wretch he considered himself now, a mere shadow of what he could, _should_ have been.

Swallowing the fruitless rage at himself, Kaname focused on following the man's every movement, his gaze intent and worried, willing himself to remain as impassible as possible. It wasn't an easy task, when the hunter's callused hands gripped the pureblood's bruised knees and pulled them up, spreading his pale legs.  
The brunet bit his lower lip and willed himself to be strong. _It's nothing more than what happens every day. It doesn't have to be any worse today than any other day. I just have to pretend it doesn't matter. Pretend that I don't care. Pretend nothing matters anymore. Pretend so well that maybe I'll manage to convince myself too. Even when Kiryuu-sama comes. If only... If only I could... _He gasped for air, feeling as if he couldn't breathe.

Yagari's voice broke the still silence of the room, startling Kaname who was still trying to breathe evenly, and who had come to think the hunter wouldn't bother talking to him anymore. The fury and disgust still visible in the man's eye were just as present in his voice.

"Now, vampire, do I need to tie your legs apart too, or will you be an obedient little bloodsucker and hold them up for me yourself?"

As he spoke, he lifted the pureblood's legs by his ankles, so that the creamy skin of the back of Kaname's thighs was offered for the whipping, while his lower legs were held higher, more or less horizontally but out of the way to not obstruct the area to be hit.

The pureblood's sole answer was to stare at the man with a look of uncertain horror that told the hunter well enough that the brunet's mind was racing, weighing the pros and cons. Being tied up was always worse, but Kaname did not want much to take the risk of promising to hold his legs up by himself then accidentally closing them midway due to the pain and getting additional punishment for that. The anti-vampire drugs in his bloodstream weakened him considerably, not only by preventing him from using any of his abilities, but also physically, so he knew that as the weariness grew he would probably be unable to hold his legs up, especially with the pain of the whipping. But to actually _ask_ to be restrained was equally horrifying.

The hunter grew impatient and ended the vampire's dilemma by deciding for him instead. He'd meant it as more of a rhetorical question anyway, and so he quickly snatched another pair of leather restraints from the table, and a few moments later, the pureblood's delicate ankles were each securely attached to a sturdy leather cord tied to the rings on the high beams along the sides of the canopy above the bed. The rope was just long enough for the vampire's legs to be spread wide open with his hips raised off the mattress of the bed by several inches. The cords and the emplacement of the rings on each area of the bed were all calculated to offer a wide array of possible positions one could tie a slave in. This one in particular left the pureblood immobilized and hanging at the perfect height for the taking, which was what the rope length and ring placement were intended for. The hunter had set him in that position with the intention to whip him instead, but the sight the vampire offered so enticingly was quite something, and the man let out a low whistle of admiration, before laughing gruffly at how the pureblood's pale skin had immediately taken a distinctively more flushed color with the additional layer of shame, regardless of how used to that the brunet must be by now.

The image was appealing enough that it made the man almost hesitate for a second. After all, he was technically paying to use the vampire, it was a waste not to take full advantage of his time there... But such thoughts were an unwelcome distraction at the face of his priorities. He remained focused on the objective he'd gone to the 'house' for, reminding himself of how important it was to not let the vampire sway him, not even into taking a different approach than what he'd planned.

He pressed the cold leather of the whip against Kaname's inner left thigh, to let him feel the rough material against the raised scar of the taming brand that the brunet had received as a young boy, after his capture at the end of the war. All vampires had those in some place or another of their bodies, branded onto their skin with a hot iron and sealed with a hunter charm. It served both as a humiliating mark of their slavery and as a charmed restraint, on top of being a disturbingly sensitive spot.  
The pureblood shuddered involuntarily at the contact, and a soft shaky breath escaped his lips, apprehension going up by yet another notch. Goosebumps rose on his skin at the contact. It was all he could do not to panic at how wide open and vulnerable he was in the current position, especially not knowing exactly what the hunter planned to do.  
Yagari slid the leather whip up Kaname's inner thigh, almost admiring how perfect those legs were, pale and flushed attractively in the right spots, trembling softly whenever the whip touched his skin.

_Vampires all have bodies much more sensitive than humans, but this boy is especially responsive… Well perhaps this too will prove useful while questioning him…_

A vampire's body was naturally far more sensitive than the average human's, not only to pleasure but to pain as well. It was something that hunters had long taken advantage of over the centuries, carefully engineering each of their weapons to inflict crippling levels of pain so that the prey could be incapacitated more easily, in some cases captured even when merely grazed by a hunter bullet. It was possible because the hunters knew that vampires would have so much more trouble handling the pain than a human would have had, their increased level of sensitivity making it unbearable. With bullets specifically designed to enhance that pain even further, it was arguably cruel but extremely effective.

After the end of the war, that sensitivity was further used as an argument in the propaganda claiming that nature had intended the vampires for sexual slavery. But while the supposed moral depravity and excessive sexual desire hunters ascribed to vampires were a subjective concept, the heightened sensitivity of the vampire bodies was very real, and frequently used against them.

Yagari brought down the whip, slashing a perfect red line across the pureblood's creamy skin.

Kaname clenched his teeth to stifle a yelp and braced himself as the hunter raised his arm again, and then again, the lashes starting to fall in an increasingly rapid succession.  
The brunet's lithe body strained to conceal the pain, to cling to that one bastion for which he could still fight. He sucked his breath in before each impact, clenching his teeth and preparing himself for the next hit right on time whenever the leather was right about to connect with his skin. Not a single whimper escaped his lips yet. It wasn't a meager feat, especially in his condition. His muscles were tense, already ready for the next blow, and his gaze was locked on the hunter, measuring his every movement to know when to brace for the next impact.

This didn't please Yagari one bit.

"Too easy, eh, bloodsucker?" He spat the word out like a curse, before adding, "That won't do. Let's make things a little more difficult for you…"

The pureblood's eyes widened in worry as the hunter reached over for the bedside drawer again and this time picked up a bondage hood. It was a dark leather mask made to slide over the slave's head and encase it securely, offering a perfect blindfold with complete coverage of the eyes and the whole area around them, fastened by the straps wrapping around the sides and over the top of the slave's head.  
It left the nose and mouth free, but plunged Kaname into a world of darkness the moment Yagari finished tightening the straps around the pureblood's head.

Kaname's jaw was set hard and he breathed through clenched teeth, trying to control the wave of panic rising from the bottom of his stomach, like a storm churning and threatening to swallow him whole.

Now the brunet would no longer be able to know when the next blow would land or prepare himself for it; the blindfold prevented him from seeing the other, from analyzing the type of person he might be based on his expressions and moods, or guessing what he might or might not do… and much worse than that, not seeing the other made Kaname's already far too abused mind slip into an instinctive panic directly derived from all the things he'd endured over the years, especially at Ichiou's hands.

He'd often been blindfolded then too. That darkness that felt all-encompassing was the same as back then, threatening to tear the ground from under his feet and swallow him whole. _Falling into the depths, blind and about to be eaten alive._

Ichiou excelled in messing with his senses and his mind, using one against the other cruelly, eroding the young pureblood's sense of reality. Depriving him of sight had been one of the older man's favorite bondage methods, especially during the early years of Kaname's captivity, and it had left a brutal mark on the young pureblood.

If he managed to cut through the roiling panic and listen to reason, Kaname knew he was not back at the dirty cot in his cell at Ichiou's place, he knew he was here at the 'house' with this unknown hunter, and yet the scarred depths of his mind whispered to him that anything could happen, regardless of how much he repeated to himself that this wasn't Ichiou. He could be organizing this, he could show up any time now... _In fact, that would be so typical of him. _

That was why the blindfold was something he'd always feared so much more than any of the other bondage restraints the customers would use. He hated being restrained by them in any way, but the blindfold was by far the worst. He had far too many traumas associated with being tied down and at Ichiou's mercy, losing even the notion of time and space amidst his terror.

_Maybe he was still back there. Maybe he never did get to leave that dirty cot in that dark cell at the old freak's place._

Maybe he'd just been dreaming all of the current events, maybe the 'house' and the past ten years were all just another of the countless delusions he'd have under the effect of the heavy hallucinogens Ichiou liked pumping him full of. Maybe his 'Kiryuu-sama' was nothing more than a figment of his imagination, created by his despair to try and escape the horror of it all. A sob broke out from his lips at such an unthinkable thought. It would make so much cruel sense too, if that turned out to be the truth.

Or maybe he was still in the middle of one of the conditioning sessions of his training at the house -he used to pass out and be prone to hallucinating while feverish during his training too. The nightmares he'd had then were too real for his abused mind to discern for sure what was reality and what was not, when he was plunged into total darkness.

The blindfold always did this to him, torturing him mentally even further than whatever the customers may do to his body. Especially with the idea that Ichiou might be just a step away, overlooking it all, inches away from touching him and subjecting him to untold horror so many times worse than anything any of the 'house' customers or handlers could ever imagine.  
_For all he knew, Ichiou could be standing right there and then, and this whole thing could have been organized by him from start to finish, even Kiryuu-sama's kind attentions that made him open his heart so foolishly. No, no, no, mustn't think of such a possibility, nooo…_

He was hyper-ventilating by now, desperately trying to reach out with his other senses, to decide if he could trust the fact he didn't smell Ichiou in the room or not. _But there was no way to know for sure, if he couldn't see it with his own eyes. The smell could deceive him._

Nightmares from the past were awakened by his instincts and ingrained reactions, merging into the present and throwing him into even worse disarray. That maelstrom tore a breathless cry of pain mingled with fear from Kaname's lips right when the first lash from the whip came down onto his bare legs. His voice had a higher pitch than before, and a tinge of panic to it that made it sound like something close to shattering.

The pureblood trembled and held his breath in when he heard Yagari's gruff voice in response.

"You're only making this worse on yourself. It's not as if I asked you something very difficult. Just tell me what Zero Kiryuu and you have been doing and what you two have been speaking of, throughout all the times he's come here to see you, and I'll end this. Of course, if you don't cooperate, I'll be forced to assume the worst and it will only get worse and worse for you…"

"I… I…"

Kaname's voice wobbled hesitantly, and he cringed at how much it made him sound so tearful and out of breath. It reinforced the impression he was even younger than his actual age, but it didn't mollify the hunter. Yagari's reply was as stern as earlier.

"Keep going. You what?"

There was no hope to be found in expecting any mercy. Kaname tried to gather his wits and resist the gaping chasm of panic stretching beneath him, about to swallow him.

_Oh God...! It would be so easy to just obey and tell him whatever he wanted to hear..._ But then, even if the hunter had been asking that question for real, who would believe the truth when it was so impossible? And even if it had been possible to just say the truth, he knew well that this was all just a sick twisted game anyway. _No matter what he may answer, the hunter would continue hitting him all the same, and it wouldn't change anything in the final outcome of it._ The previous times this kind of thing happened, nothing he tried doing made any difference. At best, it didn't diminish his suffering at all, and at worst, his attempts to fix things backfired and only made him suffer even more.  
_Maybe Kiryuu-sama's game was seeing if his victim would try to tell the truth and incriminate him for breaking so many taboos and being so gentle to a vampire. If that's what the hunters wanted to see, then confessing would only earn him more suffering anyway... Unless it didn't even matter and they just wanted to see how long he would hold out like a fool, only to find out that they were just waiting for him to break, like everyone else before, and the moment he finally broke down and confessed whatever the hunter wanted to hear, they would bring an end to it all and do their worst._

A different thought suddenly crossed the young pureblood's mind. The ferocity in Yagari's voice spoke of the clear sincerity of his anger, and the intensity of it made Kaname's certainty waver. Maybe it wasn't all a farce after all.

_What if it wasn't even a game, or at least, if it was a game for Kiryuu-sama but this hunter was not his ally after all? What if this man was truly some random unrelated interrogator unaware of Kiryuu-sama's game? _

_What if Kiryuu-sama hadn't meant to end the game just yet after all, and the man with the whip was truly investigating the whole matter due to some suspicion of a hunter fraternizing with the enemy by treating a slave gently? If they heard about it and didn't know it was all just a game for Kiryuu-sama, they would think it was something they needed to step in to interrupt... Kiryuu-sama would have no way to prove to them that he was only toying with a vampire and that the gentleness was just an act._

It seemed terribly unlikely that it would really be a real investigation, almost impossible even, but... not _completely_ impossible.  
He didn't question his belief that sooner or later, the silver-haired hunter would break him, but what if it wasn't going to be today? What if this hadn't been planned, and if this interrogation was for real and not just part of the 'game'?

_And if it was the case, then confessing what they had been doing all this time, might actually incriminate Kiryuu-sama for real…? If this man is just an accomplice it won't change anything, but if what he says is true, then things might be very different. Nothing will stop them from torturing me either way, but this..._

Kaname knew a lot about the ways he could get himself in trouble, but he wasn't knowledgeable in the laws hunters had for their own kind, or of exactly how bad it might considered for a hunter to treat a vampire as kindly as Kiryuu-sama had treated him. _Was it just taboo and shocking, or could it actually destroy Kiryuu-sama's career?_

In a strange way, he might be gripping the one and only weapon of revenge he would ever be given.

Because if the man interrogating him really was trying to find out if any laws had been broken, then confessing and getting Kiryuu-sama in trouble would be the one way to get back at him for the whole thing, for Kiryuu-sama seducing him, sneaking his way into his heart, making him crave and need him so bad, only to abandon him like this...  
Kaname lost himself in a maze of uncertainty and fear, resentment against himself and against the hunters, against the whole world that had pushed him so far so often, like a cornered beast constantly at the edge of breaking down. He wasn't even sure anymore if what he was thinking made any sense at all, but in the middle of that whole chaos and panic that little light of revenge made itself visible. In his current condition that was truly the only weapon he might ever have the chance to use to strike back at a hunter who played him.

Sure, the interrogator might be just lying to him, but if he wasn't, then confessing was definitely the way to go. There was a big risk in it since if it failed, he would suffer through the very worst of whatever they may be planning for him, but he was certain they would already do their worst no matter what, so his fatalism born from experience convinced him that the danger wasn't significantly increased. And besides it was well worth the risk and the pain just for that one shot at payback. If it succeeded and if the one-eyed hunter wasn't part of the game, he would drag Kiryuu-sama down with him.

It was the perfect plan, reason and resentment told him. It wasn't as if he ever was given many chances to manipulate a situation into his advantage or to get back at hunters for all the misery they inflicted on him constantly. It was the one chance he had, and it was just perfect, even if it meant falling too. At least he would take down his enemy in the same fall.

He would finally have revenge, for once. It was within reach now, just waiting for him to stretch his fingers and grasp it.

_So why did it feel like his heart was shattering to pieces right then and there?_

A hot tear welled up, soon to be joined by another one, and the brunet squeezed his eyes shut tight, feeling the leather of the mask pressed tight against his lids, feeling the material drink up his tears.

_I'm the biggest fool of them all. _

_A hunter comes here, waltzes his way into my heart, and makes me into such a complete thrall that I can't even think of betraying him without breaking into tears. It wouldn't even be a betrayal! It's not as if he cares about me! It's all only a game for him anyway! I was the only one who cared! He's just waiting to break me to pieces!_

A hard ball of anguish was lodged tightly in the brunet's throat, squeezing his windpipe and making it hard to breathe. The tears came harder now, making it more and more difficult to keep some measure of dignity and not openly sob.

Over the past weeks, Zero had become so important for Kaname, that he'd ceased to be simply some random hunter that was unexpectedly kind, and had instead reached a semi-divine status. Even if Kaname was too hurt and too broken to actually believe this gentleness could be real, doubting his silver-haired savior was so horrible that it was nearly physically painful. He'd always expected to be betrayed by his precious Kiryuu-sama, but he couldn't bring himself to strike back, even more so before Zero had put an end to the game himself.

Now more than ever, the brunet had the renewed feeling he truly was a creature of contradictions, forever condemned to be stuck between a rock and a hard place, cursing his nature and his contradictory yearnings.

_What if it really wasn't a game? What if..._

WhatifKiryuu-samaactuallycared? …

_No, that's impossible. There's no way in hell that someone could possibly be this gentle to me and not have bad intentions..._

_But still... even knowing this... I can't bring myself to incriminate him. _

He sobbed softly, his chest heaving as he fought to regain his breath in uneven, bedraggled pants.

_**I'm the worst fool that ever lived. But I'll fall alone, if I have to fall. **_

_Even if it's completely impossible that you don't intend to break me, I'll fall for your sake. I'll protect you with my silence to the very end, just in case, just for the sake of that unlikely possibility that this interrogation may be for real. I can't take the risk to endanger you in any way._

Even with the panic of the current situation and the terror of the bondage mask threatening to eat away his sanity, the image of the silver-haired hunter's gentle smile was etched upon Kaname's memory, like an overly bright light seared into his retina, an image that wouldn't leave him no matter how much he blinked or squeezed his tear-filled eyes. A sun of gentleness and warmth that his vampire eyes couldn't bear to gaze up to for very long.

_I'm a moth that keeps wanting to burn its wings in your flame._

_I can't hold back my muddled feelings for you or freeze whatever is left of my heart anymore. _

_I won't play games or even try to fight back. I surrender. What will come to pass will be whatever is meant to be, or whatever you want it to be._

_**I've already accepted that I'd be yours even if you decided to betray me, anyway. **_

_So I'll just live up to it. Shatter me to pieces if you want. I'm yours to break or not. I'll protect you, in the only way I can._

When Yagari wasn't even expecting anymore that the pureblood would reply, Kaname finally spoke, in a shaky voice, catching his breath as he went along.

"I... I'm so sorry, but... I have nothing to tell you... I don't know that person or what you are talking about... I… I don't speak to the customers, nor do they speak to me. I just …obey them. There's nothing out of the normal going on and…and…that's really all..."

Despite the stammering, it was amazing that he could keep his voice sounding so earnest while lying in such a dreadful moment and under such emotional turmoil. At this moment, and out of sheer determination, he was probably doing better at sounding convincing than any other slave might have been able to in his position, even if he was very much running on fumes of instinct and self-preservation.  
He was hoping that his breathlessness and shaky weakness might play in his favor also, disguising whatever hesitation might be left in his lie and giving him a more sincere countenance than he felt himself able to convey if his voice had actually been steadier. _And with luck, the man would also think it was only the pain and fear of torture that made him tremble so..._

This was a chess game too, one for survival, and for the protection of the only good thing he had been given in this hell-hole. There was no way he would let this man checkmate him into confessing anything that might harm Kiryuu-sama in any way.

But unfortunately for him, the hunter interrogating him had an excellent knack for telling when someone was lying, especially a vampire. Skilled and determined as Kaname may be, he was nowhere in a position to be as good as he might have been, especially if he had been without the increased element of panic caused by the blindfold.  
And to a hunter as experienced as Yagari was, the slight strain in the vampire's voice, even disguised, made it clear that he was lying, and that there was so much more going on than what he was saying.

Whether he stayed silent or spoke, it was obvious that Kaname was hiding something big, just as Yagari had already assumed from the start due to the brunet's body language. The new lie only made the hunter's suspicions gain even more weight. Kaname's every gesture or sentence only dug his grave deeper, incriminating him more and more.

Yagari snarled and didn't bother dignifying with an answer what he viewed as an obvious lie and an insult to his intelligence. Instead, he brought the whip down hard onto the unprotected skin of the vampire's inner thighs, again and again marking the creamy expanse with angry red welts, paying no heed to the brunet's cries or his pleading.

"N-no, please! Please, I… I'm saying the truth!"

"Try harder, pureblood! Maybe that pretty mouth of yours can come up with a more convincing lie before I flay the skin off your bones!"

_If the little bloodsucker wanted to play such games, so would he. He'd just have to see if his tongue got any looser after a good beating._

Elsewhere, far away from the 'Blood District'_,_ Zero was still virtually buried in a pile of paperwork. He glanced at the clock on the wall and let out a curse, seeing how late it was.

Hours earlier, he'd been getting ready to leave the office at his usual time, right when an urgent and awfully time-consuming assignment had popped up at the most inconvenient moment possible and had kept him chained to his desk since then.

Dinner time had come and gone a long while ago, he was left alone in his section at the headquarters, and yet the mountain of paperwork showed no signs of being done any time soon. He'd grabbed some pseudo food from a vending machine and had continued hard at work, but the feeling of something being awfully wrong wouldn't leave him.

Zero was a hard-worker and wouldn't be the type to complain about assignments or about having to put in extra time, but he couldn't shake off the sensation that this completely unnecessary task being tagged as urgent and explicitly given to him alone was disturbingly suspicious. Nothing about that paperwork was urgent at all, and it seemed more like the file had been specifically engineered to be tediously lengthy, and had been delivered right as he was about to leave.

The Association always had people around in the building, working at various random hours, but his shift would normally have been long over. If this were any other day, he would have been free to go about his daily routine and would have made a bee-line for the 'house' immediately after work. The timing of that mystery assignment springing up on him was really too inconvenient to be accidental.

It was way too strange to be happening for no reason, unless it was an elaborate prank, and he didn't see why it would be. Either way, it seemed to indicate that someone had been looking into his private affairs, and was now purposefully preventing him from leaving at the time he would normally have gone to the 'house'.  
It seemed impossible that someone might have tailed him regularly without him noticing, and even if they somehow had, it wouldn't justify any suspicions on the HA's side, considering most hunters frequented the 'houses' on a regular basis; he wasn't doing anything out of the norm or likely to brand him as suspicious of anything. He racked his brain wondering what might be happening, and whether there could be any chance that someone might somehow suspect him or simply be trying to create obstacles for him for whatever personal reason. _But how would they know anything…? _

Notwithstanding, the assignment was a direct order from the higher hierarchy at the Association and so he had no choice over the matter. Suspicious or not, he had to finish it as ordered. But that strange situation filled him with worry and finished convincing him to try and finish it as fast as possible, and make some inquiries the next day as to what might be going on.

Unfortunately, considering how late it was he was sure it wouldn't be possible for him to have time to go visit Kaname and still make it home to sleep that night, but he would have to see him as soon as he could after that.

An irrational fear was gripping him, feeding him images of whatever could be happening at the brothel while he was strangely stuck at the headquarters.

Back at the 'house', quite a long time had passed. Both sides had lost track of how long it had actually been, but it was at any rate long enough that Yagari was finally having to make brief pauses because his arm was tiring down from swinging the heavy whip for too long.

Kaname was reduced to a mess of ragged breathing and sobbing gasps he half-choked on as they escaped his lips, but he still hadn't spoken a word of Zero.  
The brunet's creamy skin was marred with dark red welts almost all over his body, the bite of the lash particularly cruel on such a delicate surface.

Yagari's anger -and his desire for retribution to be exacted from the vampire he believed to be toying with his apprentice- had made the whipping harsher and more erratic than it might have been if it hadn't been so personal.

Kaname's backside and thighs in particular were a bloody mess of welts and torn skin, his once alabaster pale legs now flushed pink and throbbing from being hit repeatedly, long red lines spreading like blood spilled on fresh snow, a web of countless blemishes all over his silky skin.

Blood oozed out sluggishly from all the places where the leather from the whip had crisscrossed too many times over the same welts and had eventually sliced the upper layer of the skin open as if someone had shallowly ran a blade over it, repeatedly.

The pureblood's limbs were shaking hard, from pain and exertion, straining against the ties. It made the little rings connecting his restraints clink softly against each other, even during the moments when Yagari paused. That soft noise was eerie in the silence of the room, in between whipping sessions, when only Yagari's harsh breathing and Kaname's ragged panting could be heard. When the lash was back to work there was too much noise -both from the hits and from Kaname- for either to be able to hear the clinking.

Yagari made a pause, and Kaname hurriedly tried to catch his breath, chest heaving with abandon. He half-choked as he tried too fast to get his breathing somewhat under control again before the hunter started whipping him again. But control was a concept so far away from anything he could grasp at the moment, that perhaps it was a lost cause no matter how hard he tried.

Along the years, he'd been told by many that that he was beautiful when he screamed. That his ethereal beauty was made most appealing when it was most broken, when he was on the verge of tears or sobbing his breath in and out harshly among hoarse cries of pain or despair, or both. When his mind was ravaged enough that whatever pride and restraint he might still have left simply snapped away and it all came loose in a maelstrom of tears and cries and intense broken despair. When even his most carefully crafted masks cracked away and he was left bare and exposed. _Or so they would say.  
_Ironic that such a perfect beauty would reach its paroxysm when closest to the point of breaking, or just past the breaking point. Lost within such bleak thoughts, the young pureblood' mind swayed along, wondering if it was just his customers or if that was how all humans viewed such things, and whether there was any logic or gentleness left in this world of cruel games and utter deception. _Maybe… Kiryuu-sama would find me more desirable this way also. Maybe that's why he would always hold me extra gently when I was more injured, but keep me at an arm's length when I seemed to be doing better… Maybe I was more appealing to him when I was more injured. This world is made of pain and cruelty…_

Yagari was angry and hell-bent on tearing any sort of confession from him, so the flogging had been relentless and Kaname had gotten a taste of the heavy handle of the whip as well. Blood blossomed under his skin, into bruises of different sizes on various locations where he'd been struck by the thick base of the handle.

From a purely physically point of view, the young pureblood had had worse beatings before -especially at the hands of extremely sadistic visitors who had brought saws and other surgical devices-, but the frightening nature of the potential investigation as well as the presence of the blindfold awakening so many past traumas tore down his mental barriers and that wore him down considerably. Added to that, the inability of seeing his tormentor and thus of bracing himself for each hit also made that his body took the blows so much harder than it might have otherwise. The pain was so much more significant that way than if he had been able to see and thus to prepare his muscles for each lash.

He'd already been feeling exhausted from the customers before Yagari, but even more so now with the whipping, Kaname had been pushed far enough that he was no longer able to hold onto the little forces he had left, and didn't even bother trying to conceal his tears anymore. But even when so close to the edge of pure terror, he still managed to cling to that which mattered most in his eyes at the moment, protecting the reputation of his silver-haired savior.

If all he had to offer in sacrifice was himself and his broken despair and panic, then so be it; the enemy might break him but he would obtain from him no information incriminating Zero. Kaname would never betray him, regardless that deep inside, he was still convinced that Zero's kindness was just a mask that would slip away sooner or later. On account of the tiny, impossible little chance that maybe it wasn't a lie, he would _never_ take the risk.

If Zero did betray his trust, then so be it, it would only be what he had expected all along. But he'd give him the benefit of doubt to the very end, regardless of his certainty that it was but pure folly, truly a fool's hope.

_If it's but a foolish hope, then let me be foolish until the very last moment._

He would play the only pieces he had left, and keep his silence, at least until Zero made his move. _Until the checkmate. It would be up to Kiryuu-sama to play the last move. _His tears mixed with the beads of sweat on his skin, and he clung with all he had to the images of Zero holding him gently, so that he'd have the strength to keep going.

And so, he fell deeper and deeper each time the pain and the memories pushed him over the edge of a new mental cliff in the inevitable horror that blindfolded torture always awakened, until he could only sob softly on the bed, his throat hoarse from screaming too much, the blindfold soaked with his tears. The memories that resurfaced in a flurry with each blow turned the already grim reality into an even bigger nightmare, twisted by Ichiou's tainted touch and years of abuse, any form of torture made so much worse because he couldn't see who was touching him or what they might do next, or who might join in next.

Yagari was getting more and more infuriated by the vampire's lack of cooperation and utter stubbornness. He glowered at the brunet, angry and surprised thoughts swirling in his mind. _How was it possible than even now, ten years after the war, with all that happened and that must have broken each and every single one of those bloodsuckers during all those years… How was it possible that this damn pureblood continued resisting so much? What the hell did he do to Zero that is making him so adamant about staying silent?_

Running the back of a calloused hand over his sweat-drenched forehead, Yagari let out his breath, flexing his arm that was getting painful from the repetitive motions of the whip. On the bed, Kaname let out a choked gasp, half-pant and half-sigh of relief at the momentary cessation of the pain.

Yagari didn't intend to continue with the whipping though. He saw plainly how ineffective flogging the vampire was being; he had to change tactics, and go for something that might work better. But he didn't want to use the knives just yet, and a different idea formed in his mind.

_If pain alone was not enough, maybe there were other ways to add to it. _

Yagari had initially assumed the vampire would give in and obey because all the abuse he'd suffered over the years would have conditioned him to obedience and to wanting to avoid additional pain. He'd thought it would be a piece of cake considering that any slave knew better than keep secrets when ordered to speak… But perhaps the pain of a whipping alone wasn't good enough to jolt his memory, and _this_ slave needed a more direct reminder of where he belonged and of the fact disobeying a hunter was the same as asking for the worst.

_And what better reminder than a type of brutality that might feel more intimate and more direct…?_

Yagari hadn't intended to bed the young vampire when he came into the room, but if conventional types of torture didn't work to get the information out of him, then, dislike the concept as he may, the master hunter was ready to use different methods to achieve his goal.  
Unclasping the buckles behind the blindfold and tearing it off the pureblood's face to allow him to get a look at what he was about to do, Yagari placed himself closer between Kaname's still forcefully parted legs and flipped around the whip in his hand, presenting it handle first instead, and pressing the tip of it against the brunet's quivering opening. He saw the brunet's gaze go from disoriented and blinded by the sudden light, to dismayed and disheartened as he took in the sight and knew what was about to happen.

The bulbous tip of the handle was much larger than the rest of it. It looked like it might have been crafted in that shape to wrap around the hand of the person wielding the whip and to serve as something additional to strike the slaves with. The base of it was almost wider than a man's closed fist. Hard and rough, it pushed brutally against the pureblood's already painful entrance, and brought a renewed surge of panic in Kaname the very instant the hunter pressed it there. He was already torn from the previous customers, and had just briefly stopped bleeding shortly before Yagari's arrival. He knew much too well what would happen if something so hard and large stretched his painfully abused entrance all of a sudden, especially since the injuries he'd sustained before would only tear open further. No one normally bothered to prepare him, and he doubted this hunter would be any different.

The pureblood had felt an initial instant of relief when the blindfold had come off; the instant he'd been able to see the room again, his gaze had immediately rushed to scan the surroundings and make sure that Ichiou wasn't around after all. But he realized now that he was being proverbially thrown around between Scylla and Charybdis. And for this, being able to see wouldn't give him any advantages.

Yagari's menacing tone of voice left no doubt about his intentions. "I have waited far too long already. I showed you more mercy than an animal like you could ever deserve. You brought this upon yourself."

Kaname could only react with panic as the ruthless pressure against his intimacy heightened. The handle was considerably thicker than most things he was usually penetrated with, and he knew from experience that he wouldn't come out of it unscathed. Tiny beads of cold sweat formed on his skin, the feeling contrasting oddly with the sensation of his body still heated from the whipping.

The young brunet made one last minute panicked attempt to avoid the imminent invasion, but the hunter immediately interrupted him.

"Please! Please, I swear I don't know anyth-"

"There's NOTHING you can swear on that I'll ever believe, bloodsucker! Give me the truth, or take what you deserve!"

"…"

Kaname's gaze was tearful but unexpectedly clear and determined, something quite unexpected, especially in one genuinely so afraid. He parted his lips once, briefly, as if hesitanting but considering saying something more, then decided nothing he might say would make the other change his mind, and so he just stayed silent, trying to control his breathing, a fatalistic determination shining in his eyes. He looked away, turning his head to the side as far as he could with the restraints and pressing the side of his face against the bed as if he could find some escape in the gesture, then clenched his eyelids shut tight and braced as well as he could for what was to come.

Nothing he could say would save him anyway. The only thing speaking might achieve would be to drag Kiryuu-sama down with him, and that was inacceptable. So there was no doubt left to have, he would just have to endure whatever might come his way. He wouldn't say a single word about anything. He didn't know how much his tormentor might already know of Kiryuu-sama's visits, and he wasn't about to risk anything by speaking even a word. _Whatever will be, will be. _  
Never mind how loud the voice of the despair inside his own mind was, reminding him that it was all a joke, that they were playing with him, and his precious 'Kiryuu-sama' must be doubled over with cruel laughter each time he looked at the clock and saw how long his victim was lasting trying to protect him.

_Could Kiryuu-sama know? Am I predictable enough that the others would anticipate that I would attempt this folly, that I would try and cover up for a hunter? _

_A hunter who was probably just waiting for the right moment to finish me off?_

With that desolated look on his graceful face, his delicate lips trembling softly and his skin flushed attractively despite the injuries, the young pureblood was a perfect picture of tragic beauty, touching enough to have moved even the most hardened hearts, had they seen the truth of his plight instead of seeing him through the biased view of him being a vampire and thus the enemy. Only such preconceived blind hatred could prevent anyone from seeing the desperation and broken innocence emanating from every pore in the brunet's body.

As it was, even Yagari, determined to extract the truth from the boy as he may be, felt guilty for what he was about to do. But he was sure that Kaname was hiding something, and was willing to go to whatever lengths to make him confess. He squashed the budding feeling of guilt and practically growled in annoyance, snarling out a furious, "So be it then, vampire. You're the one who made that choice. I'll split you in two if I must."

The pureblood's jaw was set hard, and he braced himself as well as he could for the pain that he knew would inevitably be brutal. Tears spilled down his cheeks anew, but still he would not speak, no matter what.

_To this hunter like to the others it all comes back to that same _'_**what you deserve, bloodsucker'**__… It's like a mantra for all of them. Perhaps for Kiryuu-sama too… But until I hear it from his own mouth, I will go on holding onto hope! Even against all logic. Nevermind that even I think I'm stupid for it. _

Breathing through clenched teeth, Kaname was trembling visibly as the pressure increased. New tears he would have wanted to refuse shedding continued to roll down his cheeks unheeded, regardless of his best efforts. He clenched his teeth hard in an attempt to hold onto something, _anything,_ to withstand what was about to happen.

Yagari made to shove the handle of the whip in, apparently undecided as to whether proceeding slowly would be better, or shoving it all inside in a single move. At any rate, the opening was far too tight for the latter and gave way slowly only, as the very tip of the handle begun to force its way in, breaching the resistance and starting to agonizingly spread the young pureblood open. A trickle of blood rolled down the brunet's cleft as the injuries done by previous customers tore open further, and Kaname bit his lower lip, squeezing his eyes shut harder as he felt the blunt object slide in deeper, a couple of inches now, making him feel like he was about to be split in two. He could feel that the thicker part was yet to come, and braced himself as well as he could, breathing with difficulty through the pain.

It was paradoxical, and yet he always instinctively closed his eyes whenever someone was about to penetrate him, be it with a part of their bodies or with anything else. He hated being unable to see, but he couldn't bear to keep his eyes open during that particular moment. But at least now that the blindfold was off and he didn't have to contend also with his irrational fears telling him Ichiou might be around. It made a world of difference. Without it, he was free to close or open his eyes as he wanted, to check and make sure every so often.

But before the handle could go in deeper or tear his wounds open so much worse, hurried footsteps resounded in the corridor and the room door swung open suddenly, hard enough that it slammed against the wall before being swung back shut equally quickly.

Those same hurried footsteps rushed towards the bed, but it was only when Kaname heard the voice of the owner of those steps that he could truly believe what was happening. He opened his eyes again, with a look of utter shock and horror.

The youthful voice of the newcomer was filled with absolute outrage and rightful anger as he furiously exclaimed, **"Master! What the hell are you doing?"**

Yagari stared up from the bed, in displeased surprise. He'd never expected Zero to be rid of the paperwork still within that same night, much less for the 'house' to let someone else into the room despite the fact he'd already booked the slave for the night. It was against all the rules.  
The Master hunter didn't know it, but Zero had somehow managed to finish everything off at ludicrous speed and had acted on his worries by rushing to the 'house' the very instant he was done with the assignment.

Upon arriving there, already with the suspicion that someone had arranged things to prevent him from going that night, Zero made a beeline for the front desk and claimed that the person currently with the pureblood was a friend of his and that the check-in paperwork must have been filled wrongly since they had intended to rent the slave for some group action that night, and not for an individual use. Zero worded things in a cunning manner to make it seem like it was all prearranged between him and the other hunter, and that he was merely late. Group reservations were pricier, so switching it was in the 'house's best interest, and Zero had also flashed some extra cash which ensured he had the full attention and cooperation of the man at the desk, an obsequious young handler hoping for a fat tip for smoothing things over and changing the reservation.

And all in all, they couldn't care less what the hunters decided among themselves as long as the 'house' got paid, so Zero managed to switch the reservation to a group one and be let in despite how irregular the situation was, and how impossible it would have been otherwise, if it had been an unknown hunter likely to call out his lie and get him thrown out.

But now that Zero was finally there, things were going so much worse than whatever he could have expected, and not only because of Yagari.

Kaname was frozen in place. He'd already known it was Zero long before he heard his voice. Somehow, he was so attuned to him that he'd known right away, almost before he'd even picked up on the familiar scent when the young hunter had entered the room and slammed the door shut. He knew it in his very blood, that Zero was coming. However much the idea of being so open to the man terrified him beyond belief.

But rather than reassure Kaname, the silver-haired hunter's presence made a wave of utter horror rack through the brunet's already exhausted body.

A human in Kaname's situation would have been elated to hear his lover coming to his rescue, but the world they lived in made things so very different, so utterly hopeless and impossibly tainted with the poison of violence and despair.

The previous time someone had toyed with Kaname like that, they'd done all the same things, sending an accomplice to torture him and then coming to join that person later that same night, putting an end to their cruel game and shattering Kaname's frail hopes that someone might treat him well or care at all about him. It had happened before too. Each time it was different, and yet in the end it always turned out the same, he was deceived then humiliated and destroyed a little further, losing more and more little bits of himself and of his ability to ever trust again.

It had been horrible each time, but now it would be countless times worse.

Because with them, he'd only had half-hopes and strange longings telling him they might help him improve his situation. There had been no actual _**feelings**_, deep, tortuous yearnings, wistful desires, nothing of all those things he felt when he was with the silver-haired hunter. Oh, with him… **Everything** was different.

He'd opened his whole heart to this man. He'd refused himself for so long, trying to fight and convince himself that he shouldn't give in to the growing affection. But in the end, he lost all along, and he'd held himself wide open for the hunter.  
Zero had the power to shatter him completely, heart and body, so incommensurably deeper and worse than others could.

_And what other reason would there be for him to be here now? The game is over. Checkmate, I have lost once again, foolish vampire that I am…_

What had he held so hard onto his last forces for? The mere sight of Zero _here_, _now_, was enough to nearly break Kaname on the spot before anything even happened. Because there was no reason for the hunter to have appeared now, if not to confirm that his worst fears were indeed true. He really had come to join the other hunter, like all the others before.

Horrified tears spilled down the pureblood's cheeks. His face had been flushed until a moment before, but it was now lividly pale, a look of absolute unbridled horror distorting his delicate features and making him look as if he was at death's door.

Kaname was certain that the time he'd most feared each time he'd been with Zero had finally come – that Zero would drop the mask and reveal himself to be like every other hunter. How could he possibly think otherwise? With the experience he had of people?  
Each of the previous times that people had approached him faking kindness, there had been a defining moment like this one, when the mask had finally broken. Kaname had been too badly abused in the past, he could hardly be blamed for his certainty that this was exactly what was happening now too. Nothing Zero could have done differently would have prevented the brunet from fearing his past experience was repeating itself now. There's only so much you can suffer through before it twists your very vision of the world and completely crushes your ability to hope. Especially in a world already normally so bleak.

Kaname had tried so hard to not let Zero get too close, to not allow his heart to open up to him or warm up under his touches… but he'd been lost in the freezing darkness for far too long, and it had been simply impossible to go on resisting the hunter's soothing touches, regardless of how much his reason told him that the price to pay later would be much worse… He needed that warmth Zero gave him, he needed it so desperately much, even if the price to pay was losing what little he had left…

His heart, and himself.

He was certain that there was no way the hunter wouldn't eventually betray him, and yet, he'd yearned for him so terribly much that he had been willing to overlook that certainty for the time being, and only worry about the tragic consequences such a thing would have once it actually did happen…

To cover his eyes and focus on the moment at hand, in order to avoid looking at the inevitable destruction looming on the horizon, just waiting for the right moment to strike and tear him apart.

_Well, now that time has come, hasn't it…?_

The brunet's already dangerously shaken mind plunged into complete panic, and he could only scream.

"N-no…! No… PLEASE, NOT YOU! Kiryuu-sama… NOoo… No… no…!"

The terror Kaname felt now was by far much worse than the much more simple and familiar dread he felt when he was about to be breached by the whip handle, a type of sensation he was far more used to, however horrible and painful such a thing may always be. Physical pain was _nothing_ compared to the utter agony of the despair swallowing him now.

Said whip handle was still in place, now back to pressing threateningly against the entrance of the pureblood's intimacy. It had mostly slid back out when Yagari had jerked to look at the door, but the master hunter's ingrained instincts were of not displaying surprise or hesitation while in the presence of a vampire, and so that momentary shock was immediately overcome, causing the handle to be somewhat awkwardly frozen in surprise but nevertheless still firmly held in place, nearly pushing back into the brunet's trembling flesh.

Yagari hadn't let go even when Zero ran into the room, but his hand –and the whip— had begun to slightly shake from contained anger. Not at Zero's arrival or even at his outburst itself, but at something Kaname had said, and that the older hunter couldn't have missed.

Still on the bed, Yagari lunged closer to Kaname, his free hand flying for the vampire's hair, grabbing onto a handful of it and using it to yank the brunet's head up, tearing out an yelp from him as he was jerked up and as far as the restraints would go. The pureblood's quivering backside was now even more fully pressed against the whip handle, as the new position forcefully caused him to practically be sitting on the tip of it and on Yagari's hand. His entrance stretched painfully once more, and the muscles on his arms and legs screamed in protest at being pulled taut and nearly beyond their limit, as the restraints were too short for such a position and were biting hard into the brunet's wrists and ankles.

The movement was too quick even for Zero to react, and before he could say anything, Yagari's voice rang loud with anger in the room, finding no match to it in the horrified expletive Zero let out in response, or in the pureblood's choked panting and stifled mix of whimpers and gasps.

"Six hours! For more than six long hours, I interrogated this bloodsucker and he wouldn't speak a single word about you! He swore to me he didn't even know so much as your name! And the moment you step into the room, it's like magic, he suddenly knows your name and calls it with no hesitation or anything. What an interesting miracle!"

But if Yagari's fury was liquid fire, burning on contact and sending renewed tendrils of panic through the pureblood's already beyond horrified mind, Zero's fury was pure ice, a cold anger that encompassed the whole room and that the young hunter never expected to ever feel directed at his beloved master.

It wasn't at Yagari as a person that the wave of anger was directed, though –it was at this entire society that condoned such things and made good people, people like his master, to truly assume that torturing a vampire _'just to make sure nothing wrong was going on'_ was something fine and acceptable, just because the captives were '_bloodsuckers'_, '_beasts'_ or so many other derogatory words that Zero heard everyday.

Words Zero himself wouldn't have hesitated to use in the past. _Before he met Kaname, that is._

The look in the young hunter's eyes as he strode closer to the bed was unmistakable, and one Yagari had never seen his disciple sporting. It was indignation so deep it bordered well on pure rage, something the silver-haired man hadn't displayed even in dire missions where they'd tagged along together and where Yagari had gotten to see Zero flawlessly take down dangerous level E's without ever putting on an expression of anger or anything anywhere near the look he had now.

Putting a knee on the bed then sliding closer to the pair hurriedly, Zero wrapped an arm around Kaname's trembling shoulders, trying to keep his hold gentle and convey reassurance and protectiveness into it.  
His voice was in perfect contrast with the gentleness of his touch as he practically hissed out, "Master, let go of him. _**Now**_." He managed to keep his tone of voice even but the worlds were dripping with anger.

If it had been anyone else but Yagari, Zero wasn't sure what he might have done. As it was, he was terribly tempted to grab and shove back the older hunter's hand that was still on the bleeding vampire, but he forced himself to take a controlled breath, reminding himself that this was his master, who was more of a father for him than anyone else. Deep inside, angry or not Zero knew that Yagari hadn't had any _truly_ bad intentions –he hadn't tortured Kaname out of sadism, but out of over-protectiveness towards his disciple. But if it had been someone else, that knowledge wouldn't have saved the person from Zero's wrath.

And much as the final results still infuriated Zero, he tried to remind himself that the true culprit was the outlook their world had of vampires, that insidious status quo that corrupted the minds of everyone around him, and not his master himself.  
Or at least, he _had_ to tell himself those things, or he wouldn't be able to reconcile in his mind his idea of his beloved master and the shocking sight in front of him, with Kaname spread on the bed and so obviously having been tortured by that same man. _It couldn't possibly be the same person who had raised his brother and him and taught him everything he knew, could it?_ The mere thought of such a thing was heart-shattering. He owed this man everything he was. He couldn't believe his master could ever behave like all the others.

But it still didn't diminish his anger at seeing the state the pureblood was in, of course.

Yagari, still taken aback by the intensity of Zero's glare, hesitantly let go of the pureblood's hair and shifted backwards on the bed, before getting back up with the whip still awkwardly in hand and an uncertain look upsetting the severity of his expression. He felt strangely as if he'd touched and defiled something he shouldn't have. It was a most odd feeling, considering it concerned a pleasure slave in a brothel; but when he saw the strange possessiveness with which his apprentice held the vampire, he couldn't help but feel that way, shocking as the idea may be to him. As if for some unexplainable reason, that bloodsucker actually _belonged_ in the younger hunter's arms, rather than in the clutches of the 'house'.

Zero was meanwhile quickly unclasping the restraints secured to the shackles on Kaname's wrists and ankles, but he continued speaking, through clenched teeth. "For your information, master, he was acting on _my_ orders. _**I**_ told him to act as if he didn't know me, even if he had to lie for that. _**I**_ told him not to tell anyone that I'd told him my name."

Yagari felt tempted to retort that that was not how things were supposed to work. A slave wasn't supposed to ever disobey a command from any hunter –or from any human, for that matter— regardless of who might have told him what. Slaves were to obey anyone and everyone, regardless of what the order was or what they might have been told by someone else. If they failed to keep a secret as a result, then it was simply their fault and they were punished, regardless of the fact they were expected to reveal it if asked. The system wasn't about being fair, it was about total obedience and subservience from its prisoners.  
But the surprise of hearing that Zero was the one who had ordered the vampire to remain silent kept Yagari from voicing his objections. His mind was racing to process this new information, too busy wondering why Zero would bother doing that, and in turn too occupied to complain about the rest. All along, he'd assumed that the vampire's silence was to hide his own ill intentions or manipulative attempts towards Zero, and not because the young hunter could have specifically told a slave to behave in that particular way. Not to mention that managing to convince a pureblood to obey his commands so thoroughly and despite being tortured was a feat in itself. _If that story is true, that is_…_Would Zero lie to protect the bloodsucker...? _Yagari couldn't help staring at his apprentice suspiciously, trying to decide what to believe.

Zero had finished sliding off the restraints, and was pulling Kaname closer to himself, still glaring at Yagari while cradling the vampire gently and trying to impart him what sense of safety he might be able to convey in the present moment.  
But it wasn't working. Kaname shivered in his arms, his mind lurching into the storm within. The pureblood's heart was beating so fast from the sheer horror of it all that it made him dizzy from his weakened and drugged up blood flowing through his body so much faster all of a sudden. The pounding against his ribcage sounded deafening to the brunet, as if the sound could verily echo off the walls of the room and drown all other noise. His stomach was churning in horror, making him nauseous with anxiety, even as Zero's warm arms embraced him. After what had seemed like an eternity, he nervously gasped for air, not realizing he'd been holding his breath. Panic engulfed his mind.

The certainty that Zero would betray him any second now was nearly enough to suffocate the brunet. All he could think of was the inevitability of his imminent doom, as he went on expecting the worst to come in the seconds that would follow.

Against all that he believed in and knew he still needed to go on living for -in case the world ever changed, in case Yuuki ever somehow came to need him for anything, in case he could one day somehow be of any help to her through his life or his death...- against all that, an irrational part of him wished with all he had that he didn't need to continue living after this day, and that the hunter would just be merciful and kill him once he was done with him. It would be far less bad than surviving the upcoming ordeal. _But no such luck for slaves, especially not a pureblood one. They were far too expensive commodities to be given any mercy._

He was so certain of his imminent doom that he didn't immediately understand the words exchanged by the two hunters, until realization dawned slowly and the pureblood begun to grasp what was happening.

Holding him gently in a careful embrace, Zero wasn't turning against him or brutalizing him, he was… _defending him?_

Kaname's mind was spinning and he couldn't quite understand. The reality in front of his eyes clashed too strongly with the way he'd been expecting everything to unfold, and the two extremes were so different that he found himself utterly lost and unable to process the current events and understand exactly what was happening or how it was even possible. He didn't know anymore which part of what Zero was saying might be a lie and which part might be true. But everything seemed to be turning upside down and what he'd believed all along to be fake and a game seemed to be instead turning into the sweetest truth possible, if only his ravaged heart could bring itself to hope again and to still think there was any chance this could go on any longer. _But… that couldn't be…? How could such a thing be possible?_

Yagari too, looked puzzled. Displeasure and suspicion were written all over his face. He'd paused for a moment while he examined mentally the unexpected piece of information Zero had given him, but he couldn't see any scenario where it wasn't at worst a lie to cover up for the pureblood's attempts to hide whatever he had done, or at best a very bad idea on Zero's part, regardless of what might have motivated it. He finally settled for asking, "But why would you tell this _thing_ to keep your secrets in the first place?"

There was quite a measure of disapproval in his voice, and it was clear that the question he truly wanted to ask was _'why would you stupidly behave with a slave in a way that required secrets being kept to conceal it in the first place?'  
_Especially when one knew well that secrets held by slaves had no meaning. Any normal slave would have immediately confessed the secret when asked by a handler or anyone else, instead of putting up the unthinkable resistance Kaname had put up, withstanding pain and horror just to obey such an unexpected command. It was beyond foolish to risk so much, and Yagari didn't much like the idea of his apprentice making such dangerous mistakes.  
The question Yagari did ask was close enough to the one forming in his mind though, and so Zero's answer went straight to the point his master had left unspoken. Whether it was because the younger hunter had sensed what his master was truly thinking or because he was simply reacting to the reproof in Yagari's eye, Zero blurted out his answer angrily.

"Because I'm not an animal! Because I see no interest in raping and brutalizing someone, vampire or not, just to feel stronger than them! And because in the screwed up world we live in, that could get me in trouble! So I decided to keep certain things secret. We treat them like they're less than animals, but what does that makes _**us**_ when we rape and beat them?"

Zero strongly hoped the other man would understand. If it was anyone else, he'd just have continued keeping his secrets and not bothered trying to get the person to understand or accept the way he thought, not when there was so much at stake.

_But this was Master Yagari, for crap's sake!_

Not only did Zero want to believe that the older hunter would not betray him, but he deeply, seriously hoped to get him to understand. Even if he had to ram the idea into his mind with words so much more direct than he would have normally ever dared throwing at his master's face. The young hunter's cheeks had taken a distinct pink flush after his words, and a part of him was reeling in horror that he'd just yelled at the master he respected and loved so much, but… he'd also just pried the man off Kaname's battered form, and he was still torn between the fury he was feeling and his need to get his master to accept his view of things.  
Not only because otherwise, Yagari might start his interrogation attempt all over again another night, but also because of much deeper reasons: Yagari was the one person he looked up to, the one person other than Ichiru from whom he craved approval and acceptance.

_It was important. He couldn't __**not**__ explain it to him. He __**had**__ to get him, of all people, to understand._

Surely, he couldn't be the _only _onewho found disgusting the way everybody treated the vampires? Surely, his master, his surrogate father in so many ways, couldn't agree with everybody else that vampires were nothing more than living sex toys to be abused at will? They'd had countless discussions before, about what was and wasn't right in the current society, but it had always been about Yagari rebuking him and worrying that Zero might be too idealistic for his own good. Now that it was no longer about lofty ideals and vague concepts, but about a person of flesh and blood, trembling on the bed between them and bleeding from the abuse he'd just received, it was so much more important than ever before. Zero's arm around the brunet's shoulders tightened his grip gently, trying to convey to Kaname the idea that he would make things alright, somehow.

Unfortunately, a lifetime of anti-vampire beliefs and ten additional years of the current worldwide status quo were not so easily shaken, even by the youthful determination of one's apprentice. Zero himself, if he had led a different life, might have come to fully believe the things the other hunters accepted so easily. It was inevitable for a man of Yagari's age and background to view with intense skepticism his apprentice's reasons and justifications for anything that amounted to protecting or defending a vampire.  
If anything, Zero's determination and earnestness only made his words appear even more blatantly misguided and reckless to Yagari, who now saw his apprentice's reasons as foolish whims requiring a quick intervention to protect the boy from the dangers of idealizing a race of bloodsucking beasts.

Yagari bellowed, "Are you out of your mind? I thought I trained you better than that! How could you possibly think a bloodsucker is worthy of anything, much less of trusting them with secrets that could harm your reputation and endanger your career?"

In his personal life, Yagari was not prone to unnecessary cruelty. But this was completely different. The way he saw it, it was his duty as a teacher to protect Zero from such dangerous situations, and seeing him purposefully walking head first into disaster was insupportable. By now, it was plain enough for Yagari that Zero's behavior towards that vampire was far too protective for his own good, and that it could easily damage his reputation if others found out about this folly. The boy was just starting to rise in the Association and he could lose all his chances if such a scandal were to dirty his name.

Visiting brothels was perfectly fine and a widespread practice, but being found guilty of _'subversive ideas' _was serious business, and the thought-police mentality of their current society was not something that should be underestimated. Preeminent hunters had their careers ruined for disagreeing with the Association leadership, even on significantly less important matters than the vampire slavery. The danger would be all the more if it came to such a clear-cut subject on which the leadership was completely intransigent.  
Even a man like Kaien Cross, one of the strongest hunters to have ever lived, and a good friend of Yagari's in the past, someone who had once been in line to be the next HA President, was now reduced to a life of opprobrium and mockery due to his beliefs, and how unkindly the modern world took to them.  
No, there was no way he could allow Zero to walk such a path too. The boy showed such amazing potential as a hunter and had such a bright future ahead. So many doors were opening up for him, and so many more would too as his power grew and his skill became more and more clear. It would be a crime to ruin his chances out of a foolish youthful mistake.

Yagari suddenly found himself regretting bitterly not having brought a concealed gun tonight. He could have simply ignored Zero's ranting and put an end to the accursed bloodsucker right on the spot, simultaneously putting a quick end to Zero's problems. It would get two birds with one stone, by keeping the whole situation a secret forever, as well as freeing Zero of that unhealthy attachment.

But luckily for Zero and Kaname, Yagari didn't have anything on him that could bring death swiftly enough to the shivering ball of misery currently cradled in Zero's protective embrace. The master hunter huffed in contempt, vaguely pondering whether Zero might actually have the time to try and stop him if he attempted to kill the vampire using nothing but his bare hands and hunter charms. He decided against it based on the fact that purebloods, even weakened by drugs, were particularly hard to kill and it would probably require a little more time to finish one off than he could muster in a single quick blow, since he could easily surmise from Zero's posture that the younger hunter would have wrestled him off the vampire if he tried such a thing now.  
He would like to believe Zero wouldn't have dared, but after what the boy had just said, Yagari wasn't about to take the risk. From past experience hunting together, he knew Zero packed quite a heavy punch, far more powerful than the strength the boy used when they sparred. And even if he believed he would eventually have the upper hand in a fight with his student, he'd hate to give the vampire the satisfaction of seeing two hunters rolling on the ground exchanging blows.  
No, for now, it was best to momentarily step away and attempt to reason with Zero. With luck, the boy might just be confused and feeling possessive of his favorite slave, and was probably only behaving overly gently to '_it'_ due to misguided idealistic ideas that shouldn't apply to bloodsuckers. Things might not be too bad yet. It was important to explain things, to get Zero to realize his error, one way or another. Even if that meant being more than a little blunt and brutal. Setting aside the thoughts of physical violence for the moment –although he still regretted not having killed the vampire before Zero's arrival-, Yagari instead launched out on a tirade in a somewhat patronizing lecture tone.

"Look, I know how youth is, Zero. Youth can be like disaster waiting to happen. It's full of ideals and energy and it makes you feel like you could change the whole world. But you _**can't**_. The world is the way it is. It might not be perfect, but you just have to live with it. And if you ever decide to try and go change it anyway, I'll be happy to be standing by your side when you do… _**if**_ you want to change it for a _good_ reason, and for the sake of something that's actually right and good for _you_. Not for a bunch of beasts. Not because you've been fucking a whore of a bloodsucker that is so good in bed that _it_ makes you want to behave like _it_ deserves the consideration a human should get, rather than being treated like the soulless animal _it_ is."

Zero's eyes flashed with anger and shock at the man's words. He opened his mouth to fire off a nasty retort when Yagari quickly raised a hand in a gesture to signal that he wasn't done, circumventing his student's interruption. The older hunter continued in the same tone, sounding paternalist, stern, and above all utterly contemptuous for the vampire shivering on the bed.

"Well, let me tell you, whatever misguided ideas you might have right now, that _thing_ in your arms doesn't deserve your care, and _it_'s alive only to serve all of _its_ customers that way anyway, so you're wasting your time and your future chances by treating it like _it_ is special! Go care for a mangy dog from the streets instead, will you? That at least would be better than getting all attached to some filthy beast just because _it_ is a good lay. Of course _it_ is good in bed! That's what they exist for! That's all that they are left alive for!"

Yagari had never been an outspoken advocate of the sexual slavery imposed to the vampire race –he accepted it as something that was part of the current world, although deep inside, he thought it a strange and somewhat repulsive idea, not because he thought vampires should be free, but because screwing one seemed like a stupid idea to him. He was by far more of a believer of putting an end to their misery with a well-aimed bullet to the head instead.  
He wasn't defending those ideas out of personal conviction. But if Zero was going to risk his career because of a damn bloodsucker in a brothel, he wasn't about to pull punches or be delicate in his explanation. Far from that. And if by being vulgar and brutally to the point, he might help open his apprentice's eyes, then so be it. He was aware that he was being unnecessarily crude, even cruel, in his wording, but it was also helping him vent off the considerable anger he felt at the vampire right now.

Zero's eyes were shadowed by his bangs, and from the way his head was lowered Yagari couldn't quite see his face. But the tenseness in the younger hunter's shoulders and his clenched jaw were obvious even from afar. He was practically shaking with anger, trying to hold back from saying something he might regret.

In Zero's arms, Kaname continued shivering softly, his gaze empty and dead. His legs and backside were burning up with the agony of the cooling lash wounds. He felt dizzy and remained as silent as he could under the onslaught of insults, as if he hoped that by curling up into himself and staying very quiet and very still, he might perhaps disappear for a moment and not be obliterated by either side. If he could somehow burrow against the younger hunter's chest and disappear forever, he would happily have done so. Tears burned anew in his tired eyes.

The pureblood was deeply hurt, not only by the man's words, but more by the fact that in his heart, even he himself believed Yagari's words to be the truth, and so in turn he feared so much that Zero too would finally see it all as it truly was and follow his master's advice. Kaname's slave-training and the brutal way it was constantly reinforced by everyone and everything around him had deeply warped his sense of worth and his perception of things, and that only further worsened his already flawed image of himself.  
The whole world accepted as the universal truth that vision of slaves and of how they should be treated; it was Zero's gentleness that was exceptional and inexplicable, so it inevitably seemed to the pureblood that such gentleness, such an impossible dreamlike thing, could vanish so easily, like the wisps of a dream fading away swiftly when a harsh morning tears you away from that sleep.

A choked little sob shook the brunet softly and he froze, swallowing the next one and attempting to remain as inconspicuous as possible. He wished he didn't have to hear this conversation. Kaname knew well that he should be paying close attention to every single word and analyzing the two men's moves and expressions to try and see if it could possibly be all an act or not, but at this point, he just couldn't bring himself to obey his pureblood instincts and try to think strategically. Everything was just too much, and pathetic as that made him feel, he clung to Zero's clothes like a drowning man, burying his face against the hunter's chest and breathing shallowly in the space between Zero's shirt and his open jacket. He tried to hold in the tears and drown in the scent of his protector, which always made him feel strangely safe regardless of how impossible of a concept 'safety' was for someone in a situation as precarious as his.

Zero's eyes had filled with a deep disappointment long before Yagari even finished his tirade. Somehow, the silver-haired hunter managed to hear it out until the end and resisted the urge to interrupt him, but that was in a great part only because he realized he was too angry to speak without the risk of going overboard. He was trembling with barely-checked fury.

By now, not even the knowledge that Yagari spoke out of worry for him rather than out of cruelty was enough to mitigate his urge to grab the man by the shoulders and shake him around while yelling at him. Ironically, he realized that urge must be mutual at the moment.

Zero sighed deeply. He was so repulsed by Yagari's diatribe and how it had been worded, that his need to contest it had momentarily died down a little, too shocked by the man's arguments to find them worthy of a reply. Or at least, that's how his rational part reacted, but his anger wouldn't let him leave it at that, even if it was his master he was talking too. The young hunter's voice sounded awfully tired when he finally replied, almost in a whisper, but his jaw was set hard with restrained anger.

"Master… you're mistaken." He held the other man's hard gaze firmly, before continuing. "But if you can neither see that nor respect the difference in our beliefs, then at least, respect my choices?"  
He pulled the pureblood closer as he spoke, cradling him better in his arms, and Kaname shuddered, pressing himself more fully into the warmth wrapped around him, breathing and very much _existing_ as discreetly as he could, shrinking against the hunter and relishing the reprieve he found in his arms, short-lived as it may be.

But the mere sight of the vampire curling up further in his student's arms repulsed Yagari so much that he lost the teacher-like tone of his previous harangue and spat back a more heated response. In his resolve and desperation to open his student's eyes and get him to realize that the thing he held in his arms was closer to a snake than to a human, the master hunter's anger escalated, making his arguments slide farther and farther into tasteless territory.

"That _thing_ isn't a **choice**! That's a beast, less than a whore, less even than an animal! It has as much moral value as a rubber sex-cup to jack off in, or even less than that, for fuck's sake! Will you wake up already and stop treating it like a real sentient being?"

Zero's mind went blank. He nearly lost it and started yelling at his master, but he was dangerously close to snapping and actually getting physical, something he didn't want to do to Yagari, and so he struggled to regain some measure of composure. He felt like he was a hair's breadth away from getting up and punching Yagari in the face, and he was deadly afraid of how he might feel about that once he cooled down, or even simply about how things may be between them in the future depending on what he might say to the older hunter now, even if he did manage to control himself and not go as far as hitting him.

But he felt absolutely compelled to do _something,_ at least. If not in direct retaliation then at least in response to the insults.  
Maybe it was the anger increase caused by his master's latest string of vulgarity, that finally made it all overflow and made it impossible for him to hold in anymore without doing something, _anything_, to strike back or to display his rejection of the older man's words. Maybe it was that this course of action would be the best way to finally get the older hunter to shut up at last, if not by convincing him, then at least by shocking him into silence, whether from disgust or sheer surprise.  
And maybe it was also that deep inside, Zero felt guilty for those insults he couldn't stop, and that he knew must inevitably be hurting Kaname. Maybe it made him want to prove, to the pureblood at least, that whether Yagari would see it or not, Kaname was not any of those things. Whatever society may say of vampires, he, Zero, refused to see things that way. _Especially_ when it came to Kaname.

Zero himself could not have said for sure which of those reasons had tipped the balance in the end, but the final result was that Zero glared at his master for a long moment, breathing through clenched teeth and still struggling to restrain his anger, then carefully pried the pureblood off his chest –against which Kaname seemed to be still hell-bent on attempting to burrow in and disappear— and did something that made time stop for a moment, for everyone present in the room.

He tilted Kaname's head up and pressed their lips together in a passionate kiss.

The pureblood's eyes widened in shock and his heart skipped a beat, his breath catching in his throat in response to the tantalizing contact.

Yagari gaped in complete horror, watching his disciple claim the vampire's lips thoroughly.

If such a thing was possible, Kaname was as surprised as Yagari. To the point of being so frozen in place by the surprise that he initially didn't even kiss back -for a moment at least, until the dam in his heart broke down and it all came rushing in, an onslaught of sensations and irrepressible yearning flooding his sluggish reason until it finally registered that _this was truly reality_, and that _their lips were truly touching_.

At which point the brunet melted into the kiss avidly, still totally uncertain of what was expected of him but just far too delighted by the taste and feel of Zero's lips on his to be able to do anything but surrender himself completely into it. The hunter's tongue played with the pureblood's trembling lips, caressing them sensually and silently asking for entrance, without knowing how Kaname might react. But before Zero had the time to worry about whether his unexpected gesture might be unwelcome -even if he was belatedly starting to think it was perhaps the most inappropriate moment possible to suddenly up and kiss someone-, Kaname simply parted his lips in complete abandon, offering himself to the hunter without holding back or heeding any of the warnings his mind would have been firing off wildly about now, if he wasn't so shaken that he couldn't even think clearly at the moment.

Kaname's lips quivered, his breath coming out in shuddering little gasps he couldn't prevent, trembling and breathless that he was. And yet he still clung to the man with all he had, as if he was trying to melt into the kiss. Zero's qualms flew out of his mind and he grew bolder, their kiss deepening as they tasted each other, losing themselves in the mutual discovery and in the joy of that innocent and yet so utterly passionate contact that until now neither had fully understood how deeply they'd craved, or for how long they'd been waiting for it.  
The adorable manner in which Kaname surrendered so utterly, needy and starved for the contact, clinging to Zero as if he was drowning and the man was his only chance to not go under, was irresistible and considerably fueled the hunter's desire to explore so much more of that side of the brunet. Zero wished he could have made the kiss far longer and even more sensual, if it weren't for the situation and moment which were far from ideal.

Regretfully, the hunter broke the kiss, but his eyes strayed inevitably to the inviting way the pureblood's lips remained parted in a breathless sigh even after he pulled back, and the way they glistened attractively, as if begging the man to come back, to claim them all over again and make the brunet his completely. Zero swallowed hard, having to hold onto all his willpower to resist giving in to the temptation of those luscious lips. The pureblood was definitely the very perfect embodiment of sensuality, utterly tempting and yet unexpectedly innocent, all manner of paradoxical extremes all wrapped together in a splendidly enticing package.

Brief as it may have been, the kiss had been mind-blowing for the both of them. But perhaps even more so for Kaname, who had never expected to be allowed such contact and intimacy with Zero, and who felt like the hunter had somehow managed to pry open his very soul and touch one of the things he'd been most secretly desiring. It left him feeling overwhelmed by it all and utterly exposed, but also so unexpectedly safe in the silver-haired man's arms.

That had been his first kiss.

The realization was so alien that in itself it would have unsettled him quite a bit if he weren't already so shaken by everything that he couldn't stop and think of it properly, at the moment.

Of course, it wasn't the first time someone made contact with his mouth, but it was definitely the first time that could actually be called a kiss. Every time before that, had been a cruel parody of it, usually done by people intending to either bite his lips to mock him and his inexistent fangs, or simply to shove something else altogether into his mouth. He had never been _actually_ kissed, before this night.  
The innocent childhood kisses Yuuki and him had exchanged when they were small and she fed off his energy were also so different, a feather-like contact light-years away from the sensual touch of Kiryuu-sama's lips claiming his and making his knees feel weak from the sheer intensity of it.

Kaname breathed raggedly now that their lips had parted. His head was swimming and his hands were shaking softly against the spot where they were still holding to the front of the hunter's clothes, fingers losing themselves in the folds of fabric between the hunter's jacket and his shirt, the gesture mirroring how he felt both lost and yet on same time so deliciously at home as well. He had no idea how to react to such an odd feeling, and so he just clung to the man's warmth, shivering softly. His face felt like it was burning from the heat of the flush that had taken over it.  
Zero's left arm was still around the pureblood's shoulder, and his right hand now strayed to the brunet's hair, automatically caressing softly the silky locks and making Kaname feel yet a little more like he could just melt into the man's warmth, and like the light of Zero's presence was so powerful as to be blinding, enough that it might be able to consume the darkness he lived in, even if only for a moment.

But while the two were lost in each other, the gears of time were still running, and reality was bound to tear them out of their bubble much sooner than they could have hoped.

Yagari was so shocked that he'd lost his voice. It was a stark contrast with how argumentative he'd been until that point, and that brought a hint of a rebellious smirk to Zero's lips, as if he'd somehow scored a small victory in retaliation for his master's earlier behavior.  
That lull in the storm couldn't last much longer though, and unsure as the master hunter may be of how to respond to such a revolting sight, he eventually recovered. It took longer than expected but Yagari managed to gather his wits and exploded with expletives before barking out, "Are you out of your fucking mind? Kissing that _thing_? He is the enemy! And besides, you know what their mouths are for?"

Zero tried to placate his master, but it was to no avail, and the older man quickly interrupted him, unhinged with disgust and anger.

"There's no danger, he's drugged and he doesn't even has his fangs anyw-"

"I'm not even talking about that! You know what _we_ use their mouths for! You know what _countless_ people have used it for! It's… it's… just another fuck hole, for fuck's sake! It's only there for blowjobs and nothing more! It's disgusting for you to even think of using it for a kiss! Get this into your head, those beasts are nothing more than a convenient hole at everybody's disposal! Just a hole that can't refuse itself to anyone, you don't even have to get their approval to fuck it, so why would you want to treat it any other way? Just take what you want from it and move on! Don't ruin your life by treating a living hole like it has a soul! And don't ever touch something so filthy with your lips, are you out of your fucking mind?"

Kaname's gaze, which had seemed to regain a hesitant liveliness after their kiss, possibly even a modicum of hope -however much this feeling for him may be comparable to a candle flickering in the wind-, now looked as if it had died off completely. The master hunter's last words were so painfully close to what the young pureblood believed of himself that the blow had robbed him of his breath.

It was something Kaname had come to believe of himself over too many years of abuse, but which was so painful and difficult to deal with, that normally he chose to avoid as much as possible dwelling on it. The pain would still be there even if he chose to avert his eyes from that cruel reality, but it would be less bad.  
Having that painful truth exposed so brutally and being forced to face it was more than he could handle at the moment. He was suddenly terribly still, even the shivers that had been running through his body suddenly freezing, and his eyes glazed over with a sheen of despair so stark that Zero didn't think he'd seen anything that bad before, regardless of how often he'd seen the young pureblood in terribly dire situations.

Yagari had lost all restraint, too furious and too shocked to hold back or regain his calm. But he wasn't the only one losing it.

If Zero had already been looking positively furious at his master before, now he was practically livid. At long last he finally snapped, his anger rolling off in waves and causing his hands to shake, even balled into fists as they were now. He glowered at his master with a never-before-seen fury and for the first time ever Yagari told himself he wasn't quite sure he knew the young man in front of him as well as he'd thought he did.

Zero set Kaname down on the bed and stood back up ominously, his movements slow and precise like a cobra uncoiling just enough to strike. He was magnificent with the dark shadows of the canopy and of his bangs mingling together to mask his face, his eyes glowering from beneath that darkness like embers from the fires of hell. Zero's eyes may be human and not glow like a vampire's, but all hunters had something of the vampire within them, at least in the personification of a predator that was intrinsic to their nature. Zero's wrathful beauty embodied that concept so vividly that he looked like an avenging angel now, ready to rain the wrath of heaven unto any wretched creature who could commit such a mortal offense against the broken form on the bed.

But despite how deadly he looked, he was also still dreadfully young, and terribly jarred by the clash of his convictions and his master's, and by how much the older man had shattered the image his apprentice had of him. At this point, Zero was too shaken to channel his anger effectively, and was thus more liable to cause harm to himself than to the master hunter.  
He tried and failed to regain a semblant of calm and composure, then straightened himself up and glared anew before lashing out at his master, voice trembling with rage as he yelled. "Is it really that disgusting to you? How disgusting? Disgusting enough for you to yell at me and try to convince me of things you know well I won't believe no matter what? For you to spew out all that garbage? Or is it worse? Disgusting enough for you to go back to that screwed up society of ours and denounce me?"

That suggestion went far beyond the scope of their argument, and at first Yagari didn't quite know what to make of the younger hunter's words. Zero had always been prone to go to extremes when it came to what was important for him, but not in a million years Yagari could have imagined that his student felt that strongly about the foolish ideals he believed were at stake here, or much less for the pureblood on the bed, who still now looked more dead than alive but whose glazed eyes were now showing a glint of very clear worry at this new development.

Kaname seemed as though he would have liked to sink into the creases on the bed sheets and disappear to escape the storm brewing in front of him, but he was most definitely still aware of his surroundings, however much everything that had been done and said that night may have overwhelmed him. The thought that someone in the corridor might hear this conversation sent him into near panic, before he remembered that with how thickly insulated the 'house' rooms were, no one with human -or even hunter- hearing would have been able to hear them, short of being right near the door, or of opening it. And with how drugged they slaves all were, not even the vampires in the adjacent rooms would know what they were saying.  
Even dulled by the drugs, Kaname's hearing was still superior to the others' though, and he could tell that there was no one in the corridor. At that realization, the brunet released the shaky breath he didn't notice he'd been holding. He felt lost and completely shaken, but he was still able to think rationally enough that he'd gotten very afraid for Zero when the young hunter had started yelling.

But if there was no danger of an outsider barging into the room and hearing them, there was still plenty of danger stemming from the altercation itself. Zero was still fired up, and angrily pushed on further, still yelling at his master.

"Go on then! Leave this place, and go tell them how badly I turned out! Snitch on me to the association, and even to the people downstairs, for my sympathizing with the enemy and protecting a vampire! Do it, and even then, it still won't change my mind about what is right or not in this situation! It's too late for that! All you're doing is convincing me further of how wrong the world we live in is! I expected better from you, of all people!" Zero's chest was heaving, his face flushed, and pride and anger were the only things convincing him that the burning in his eyes was an impression caused by the heated moment, and not tears threatening to well up in his eyes, over how brutally disappointed in his master he felt in response to the man's behavior and words that night he was. He stood between Yagari and the bed, breaking the older man's line of sight to Kaname and looking like a wild animal guarding its cubs.

Yagari was flabbergasted. The color had left his face under the onslaught of rage from the boy he'd loved like a son all these years.

But Zero was too wound up to step down now, even in the face of Yagari's shocked lack of reply. In a moment of utter abandon, the younger hunter started making his way to the door instead, blinded by his fury and by the mix of resentment and deep disappointment."Here, I'll facilitate things for you!" he yelled, opening the door and ready to stride down the corridor. A part of him was trying to get the man away from Kaname immediately and by whatever means, but he didn't know himself how far he would have pushed this, as if compelled to pit himself against Yagari and dare the older hunter to destroy him if he wouldn't listen to him. Reason had abandoned him completely, replaced by nothing but raw fury and a type of self-destructive rashness characteristic of his own brand of youthful lack of self-preservation.

In a certain subconscious level, Zero perhaps realized that however shocking Yagari's opinions may be, the man did genuinely care for him, and accusing him like this was a way of punishing the older hunter, as well as forcing him to see the consequences of his words. But if such a calculating streak was present in Zero, it was at a level too deep for the hunter himself to grasp it consciously. He was too overrun with emotion to think rationally and understand what he was feeling or trying to accomplish anyway, beyond the immediate explosion of rage.

Zero was so furious at the moment that he wasn't even sure whether his master really would have ratted on him to the people outside or not. He wasn't sure he knew what to expect of the older man after that night.  
If he'd been thinking with a clear mind, he'd most likely have known that such a thing was not in Yagari's nature, and yet, at the moment the shroud of anger clouding Zero's judgment prevented him from seeing that. _If the man was heartless enough to be capable of torturing someone like Kaname, then there was no telling what other things he could do._ Or so, Zero thought, driven by anger and ignoring the fact that he viewed Kaname in a way that was caused by knowing him well and being aware of how broken and harmless the young pureblood was, while Yagari had no idea of any of that, and only viewed him as a potential enemy and a dangerous beast due to being a vampire and even worse, a pureblood.

The escalating momentum of this increasingly dangerous and quite potentially soon-to-be tragic situation was broken suddenly when, right as Zero swung open the door and took a dramatic step towards the corridor, he was interrupted by a combined outcry from both Kaname and Yagari, and in almost comical manner, was yanked back bodily before he could actually leave the room.

Two very different weights had grabbed on to Zero simultaneously, with such a frenzied hurry to stop his exit that they almost made him fall to the ground, as he stumbled backwards awkwardly, partially dragged back by their weight and pull. He had to regain his balance at the last second to avoid actually falling.

While each of them had completely different body-types and capacities, even more so with Kaname's current state, both Yagari and the young pureblood had been motivated by the same surge of panic over Zero's safety, and had both instinctively lunged for the young man to stop him from going any further in his self-destructive ardor.  
Despite that difference, the two of them had surprisingly reached him at very much the same time, and Yagari had gripped Zero's left arm while Kaname had latched onto the back of the young hunter's jacket, nearly falling down in his hurry to cling to him and to put his weight into attempting to prevent his exit.

The master hunter's stance was one that spoke of his worry and shock, body outstretched to take hold of his student's arm, posture rigid and disbelieving, completely disconcerted by the turn for the worse everything had taken all of a sudden.  
Kaname on the other hand, clung to Zero with all the force of his desperation and fear of what might happen to the silver-haired hunter if this momentary madness followed its course. His arms were wrapped around the young hunter's waist now, trembling from the intense exertion he'd put himself through to reach him fast enough, but holding onto him with all the strength his failing body had left and then some, as if he could with nothing but his determination and his need to protect him, make up for what his physical abilities were lacking in. He may not be as strong or fast as Yagari, but he would compensate for what he lacked with frightening levels of willpower and resolve.

It was a strange sight, the master hunter and the pureblood vampire side-by-side and united in their impetus to protect that same person, both frantic in their holding onto the silver-haired young man who meant so much for them.

It hadn't been a concerted effort, of course, and even now, the shock was evident on the older hunter's face as he saw the pureblood clinging to Zero with such obvious concern. The determination with which Kaname had rushed forward, his own wounds forgotten at the thought of Zero's danger, was particularly impressive. If not for the fact Yagari assumed Kaname's fear was of losing his protector, and not of the harm that could come to Zero, there was no doubt that the older hunter would have been mollified by the sight. -Zero may be of the belief that if anyone got to know Kaname, it should be impossible for them to go on upholding the despicable doctrine the current society leaned on, but the problem was precisely that hunters didn't normally _want_ to get to know vampires, beyond the most immediate knowledge necessary to kill or capture them. Rare exceptions aside, they simply made their assumptions and held onto them, like Yagari was doing even now, ascribing ulterior motives to the young pureblood based not on the truth, but on what Yagari himself thought of the situation or of vampires in general. It was one of the reasons why no matter what the slaves did or how much they suffered, society seemed to be blind to it, always expecting them to be dangerous and deceitful even when it should have been obvious that it could not be so for everyone. There would always be a plethora of excuses to accuse them and paint them as villains, especially a pureblood like Kaname.

But as it was, Zero's actions had certainly cut short Yagari's current chances to continue his judge-jury-and-executioner session with the pureblood or even to continue arguing the matter with his apprentice right there and then. All three of them stared nervously at the open door, no one daring to speak now that the momentum had broken and that all were aware that someone outside would probably hear if any of them started yelling again.

Yagari's glare returned full force as Zero stepped back and shifted his body sideways to place himself as a barrier between the older hunter now in front of him, and the slender vampire shrinking behind him. Kaname's legs were shaking from exhaustion, but he was back to clinging to Zero's jacket and wouldn't let go, even though he could barely stand on his own. There was no way he'd let go, not when there was still a chance Zero might be in danger. He had no illusions that he might have enough strength to do anything if Zero chose to walk out anyway, but he still clung to him in hopes the contact might make Zero snap out of his potentially self-destructive fury.

The two hunters stared each other down, neither ceding one step of terrain, until Yagari let out in a low voice, raspy from anger and emotion and through partially clenched teeth, but still quiet enough to be audible only inside the room, "You have to be completely out of your mind with the filth that animal has been filling your thoughts with, if you think I'd betray you! I came here because I wanted to handle this matter myself, discreetly, but no matter how low you fall, I'd never rat you out like that. To the Association or to anyone else! You'd have to betray the Association before I write you off, kid! You should know me better than that. You _would_ know, if your mind hadn't been poisoned by the likes of that snake behind you!"

Zero's throat felt tight and he felt himself dangerously close to tears. He still refused to back down, though, and looked out at the corridor with an unreadable expression of pain and anger before finally barking out a dry "Leave, master. Please just leave."  
He knew it would be of no use to try and explain to Yagari that Kaname had never spoken a word against the Association or tried to influence him in any way like the older hunter thought. Nothing he said until now had gone through to Yagari, so why would this? Yagari was determined to hate and distrust the pureblood and would continue doing so even if Zero had a way to show him Kaname's innocence. It seemed to be a lost cause to explain things rationally at the face of such irascible hatred.

Yagari's gaze grew darker as he stepped out of the room, whispering low for it to stay between them only, "I tried to teach you how dangerous those animals are, Zero. I thought you'd understood the lesson back when this happened" –the older hunter pointed to his eye-patch— "but I guess I was too optimistic after all. It looks like I lost my eye in vain and you'll have to see for yourself how treacherous and insidious those..." – he gestured to Kaname with a look filled with revulsion and untold promises of violence – "…_beasts_ are. Just promise me that whatever happens and however much you think you want to help that thing, you won't actually trust anything _it_ says or risk your neck or your career for it." Yagari's eye was as stormy as ever when he glared down at the pureblood again, but it softened when he gazed back at his student's face before adding in a gentler -if somewhat weary- voice, "I know this is just the madness of youth and that it will pass, Zero. You're better than that, and I'll be waiting for you to return to your senses. I have no doubt that you will sooner or later. I'm not giving up on you, kid."

Their gazes remained locked for a brief while longer; Yagari's eye was filled with a sort of paternal hope that Zero might finally see what he considered to be the truth, and Zero's eyes were like pools of agonized guilt and liquid anger.

The young hunter wanted to say that he was sorry, for his master's lost eye, for failing him then and now again, for not turning out how the older man wanted him to be, but he couldn't bring himself to say it. Not after the harsh words they'd exchanged, and not now that he no longer believed in so much of what the hunters stood for. _How could he apologize for defending the broken being that still now was clinging to the back of his jacket with such intensity, as if he was trying to protect him against all odds, even with that shaky touch?_

And so Zero did all he could do in the current situation, and simply stared back silently and closed the door of the room, like a barrier between his master standing outside and Kaname and himself inside. He stayed in silence, both because he didn't have anything he could possibly say to Yagari right now, and because he feared that if he tried to speak, he might break down crying.

_The most important bridge in his life other than Ichiru, might have burned down just now._

Yagari may have said he would wait for his return, but Zero feared that things would never be the same between them anymore. After all, it was now clear that he would never be the person Yagari might have hoped he would one day become, that ideal hunter that would never hesitate or doubt the justice of their cause.

But time could sometimes fix even the most brutal disagreements, and as Zero stood in front of the closed door and faintly heard the sound of his master's footsteps turning away, he felt that he had no choice but to wait and hope it might heal at least a part of the rift between them, since he couldn't possibly do anything else about it at the moment.

The young hunter was almost surprised by himself. Until a moment ago, he hadn't thought he would have been able to prevent himself from running out after his master to try and explain further, argue further, _anything_ further. In past years, maybe he would have done exactly that, no matter how much he may know that no explanation could possibly change the older hunter's mind.  
Hell, even a mere month ago, he would most likely have ran out after his master, trying to patch back together the pieces of the makeshift family he had with Ichiru and Yagari. His whole life he'd always had such a deep need to keep them together and make the whole dysfunctional thing somehow keep working. Out of love for the most part, but out of guilt too, his unending guilt for Ichiru's weakness, and for his master's lost eye.  
Zero's fury had sobered up some, and he was back to enough of a level of rational thinking that he could easily realize that Yagari had purposefully mentioned the loss of his eye as a cunning attempt at manipulation, aware of how deep Zero's guilt ran. It was a wily tactic to try and guilt Zero into obeying him, and if he had done it anytime other than this night, it would have been extremely effective. Zero would have done _anything_ to comply to his master's wishes and attempt to repay him for his loss. To atone for his failures.  
For years the young hunter had been driven by that urge, and even now, the knowledge of what he had cost his master ate at him inside. Needless to say, his master knew that better than anyone.  
But even with all that guilt, Zero now had something so much deeper and more important than even that, and which had prevented him from running out after Yagari, or from giving in to his manipulation.

_When did he get additional priorities that weighted this heavily in his life?_

The answer was uncertain, but it was as compelling as the soft, shivering weight still clinging to his back with such desperation that one would have thought that it was as if by holding onto the man the brunet could try and keep them both safe from the world gone mad around them.

Zero put a hand over one of the pureblood's slender ones, and squeezed it reassuringly.  
He wasn't going to run after Yagari. He would try to explain things to his master, but he would wait, until the older hunter's head had cooled off a little. If such a thing was possible, considering the severity or the nature of their disagreement. Zero knew already that any attempts at patching things or explaining would be in vain, but he still had to try all the same.

For now though, nothing in the world could make him leave that room, abandoning so soon the shaken, broken form still gripping his jacket with shaky arms and an iron will no one would have expected to find in someone who had been so brutally abused and belittled for so many years.

So instead, Zero turned back towards Kaname and wrapped his arms around the pureblood's slender shoulders, pulling him closer and letting him know it was okay, that he wouldn't push him away now anymore than he did earlier.  
Kaname melted into the embrace, still exhausted but feeling slightly less bad now that the tension was easing away a little with Yagari's departure. He didn't want to think about all the dangers looming ahead for them now, so instead he buried his face against the hunter's chest and breathed in deeply, basking in the utterly soothing effect that man's scent had on him. Zero chuckled softly at the brunet's endearing reaction, and nuzzled the top of his head, kissing the pureblood's hair and caressing it with his lips. He was surprised to see how naturally that gesture came to him when the brunet was in his arms.

Even though neither of them voiced it aloud, they both knew that tonight they had gone past a point of no return in the complicated relationship of sorts they had.

Garnet eyes strayed up to meet amethyst ones with a look of disbelieving awe and pure wonder, filled with unspoken questions, and Zero couldn't help smiling. The brunet's gently parted lips, attractively flushed and deliciously inviting, were a temptation no one could possibly have resisted.

And so Zero tilted Kaname's head back and kissed him again, more fully now, unsure of what he was doing or how wise or foolish it may all be, but emboldened by the fact the pureblood yielded so completely to his touch all over again. Kaname eyelids fluttered closed with an expression of utter bliss and he responded to the kiss awkwardly and hesitantly, but he was deliciously unresisting all the same, and definitely eager despite his clear lack of experience with that form of intimacy.

Zero chuckled softly as he deepened the kiss. It was deeply arousing how the pureblood responded to him so eagerly. When he'd first kissed him, he'd been worried that Kaname might not welcome it, but he was pleasantly surprised to see how delightfully his advances were received. It left him both tempted to push a little further and yet also wary of doing so, by fear of dampening the lovely brunet's enthusiasm. _Better to tread carefully rather than ruin it all by rushing things, especially after what the poor thing just went through._

Kaname was entranced. For ten years, he'd been forced to learn everything one could learn about how to please someone in bed… but he had no idea what he was doing when someone kissed him. He felt like a man lost at sea, and yet it was a sea of delights and discoveries to which he happily opened himself as he parted his lips to invite the hunter to claim his mouth more deeply. Whatever he didn't know, he was eager to learn, anything he could possibly learn or do to please this man. His legs were shaking harder now, but even then he knew that it was more from excitement and the rush of emotion than from the nevertheless still very real exhaustion and pain from the whipping.

But that too would have to wait at least a bit, considering his current state. Zero was noticing more and more that the brunet was very much running on fumes, and that he most likely would continue doing until he depleted all his reserves, if he made him stay up any further.  
Feeling a pang of guilt, Zero broke the kiss at last, and pressed his lips to Kaname's forehead instead, before scooping up the pureblood and lifting him into his arms bridal style, relishing in the sight of his blush going one notch redder at the sudden movement.

The hunter carried his precious charge gingerly into the bathroom, where he poured him a bath. The pureblood got cutely all flustered and tried to assure the man that it should be the other way around that things went, to which Zero replied with laughter and gentle reassurances.

Kaname wished to be preparing the hunter a bath instead, but weariness and pain were consuming what little was left of his forces, especially now that the surge of vitality that panic had given him earlier was bleeding away faster, and so he had to accept that even if the hunter had let him do it, he might not have been able to service him properly at the moment anyway. He had no choice but to rely on that oddly freeing feeling then, and surrender himself once more to the hunter, leaning back into his arms and drinking in every single one of the men's gentle touches and sweet attentions, as Zero lowered him into the bathtub and busied himself with washing them both.

The brunet's wounds impeded things getting any more heated than that for the time being, and the fiasco during that shower not that long ago was also still very present in Zero's mind, a thought that was enough to momentarily slow down the hunter's libido or his impulse to give in to the more heated suggestions his mind inevitably started to utter whenever he found himself holding the gorgeous brunet, even more so in such an intimate situation.  
To Zero's credit, the roller coaster of emotions that night combined with his worry over the pureblood's wounds made that certain things that might otherwise 'stand at attention' when the two bathed together, were currently well-behaved and remained unobtrusively out of sight, or at least weren't poking Kaname on the back while they sat together in the bathtub and Zero bathed the brunet...

Careful to use only tepid water to avoid causing him more pain, the hunter washed the pureblood's wounds and patted him dry tenderly before carrying him back into the room, still wrapped in a towel. If Kaname had been a cat, he would have been purring with all he had right about now. And even not being one it very much felt as if he might be doing it, from how contented he looked burying his face against his protector's shoulder and sighing softly, unable to hold all that bliss within himself and practically exuding it; the brunet almost couldn't believe how unnaturally happy he was at the moment, the pure delight he felt so utterly far away from how bleak his life normally was.

That innocent awe and marvel the pureblood felt were obvious in his every gesture, and they had the effect of making Zero torn between the urge to hug the endearing creature as tight as he could, and a feeling of extreme sadness at the renewed understanding of how horrible the brunet's life was, for something as simple as being kissed and not being brutalized for a few moments to be enough to amaze him to such an extent. It was heartbreaking, when he thought of it. It also made Zero desperate to make up to the pureblood for it all, in whatever way he could find. _To hell with the taboos of their society. There could be nothing wrong with kissing someone so beautiful and innocent, and one would have to be heartless to truly believe that his suffering made him any less worthy of such a touch._

The hunter held Kaname in his arms, on the blood-speckled bed, and they talked of sweet nothings, idling away the time in that tantalizing mix of intimacy and innocence that was such an inherent part of their relationship until then, both of them burning with the need to be close to the other and touch each other, but neither daring to venture much further right now. They did however exchange a number of kisses, each more sweet and captivating than the other, just satisfying enough to fill them with joy at the contact and yet far too stimulating to not leave them tingling with both the need for more and an awkward mix of yearning and hesitation, neither wanting to displease the other and both tiptoeing around each other in that same usual dance that was now so familiar to them, sweetness and wistfulness paired with caution and uncertainty.

The pull between them was stronger than ever though, and neither dared to speak yet of what it might mean for them from now on. There was no going back to how things were before, and not only because of Yagari.

Although especially because of Yagari, they both knew that they should be extremely careful from now on, and agreed that it was best to stay on the safe side and not risk any blood sharing at the moment, as the last thing they could want was to incur anymore suspicion, on the part of Zero's master or anyone else.

Zero was still on edge about the way Yagari and him had parted, and Kaname babbled aimlessly both to try to lighten the man's mood and because the exhaustion was catching up with him heavily now that the bubble of panic had burst. He did his best to remain awake and distract Zero of his worries, but tiredness made his voice sluggish and his thoughts muddled. The events of that night left him unsure of what he was left grasping at, but at any rate it was quite clear to him now that Zero was at the very least cut of a different fabric than the people who had toyed with him before, and whatever that might mean in the long run, for the time being Kaname was so utterly happy that he was practically constantly beaming, blushing cutely in Zero's arms, his smile so disarmingly innocent that it would have moved anyone who saw it.

Zero too uttered random sweet lines, lost between his dark thoughts over all that had happened, and the fact that Kaname's smiles were adorably infectious and he was getting increasingly addicted both to them and to saying whatever caused the lovely brunet to smile like that again.  
It was ironic how Kaname thought that Zero's very presence was like a blindingly bright light or a flame for the moth he viewed himself as, and yet from Zero's point of view it was the brunet's normally rare but so touching smiles that he found utterly dazzling. And the fact those smiles were so frequent and blissful that night was a delightful change.

Kaname's weariness eventually had the best of him, and he fell asleep in Zero's arms, his delicate features relaxing against his best attempts of staying awake, and his body instinctively curling into the hunter's scent and body heat. He clung to the man like a barnacle to a ship, making Zero chuckle and reminding him of how those same delicate fingers had held onto him with so much fortitude earlier, to try and prevent him from endangering himself. Such small, delicate hands, and yet, they could channel so much resolve and protectiveness despite how much their owner had gone through.

Zero caressed Kaname's face, gently prying the brunet's hand off his jacket to bring it to his lips and kiss his knuckles and his folded fingers softly. The pureblood pressed himself further into the warmth of Zero's embrace, and the hunter found himself marveling that such a beautiful creature could possibly not only exist, but trust him enough to fall asleep in his arms, especially after going through so much. Running a finger down the silky skin of the pureblood's face, Zero gently stroked his cheeks, the curve of his nose, his soft and pliant lips that seemed to entice him even in his sleep... He was careful not to wake the brunet, but he couldn't resist touching him right now. And Kaname seemed to glow, exhausted into oblivion but so amazingly happy to be in the man's arms, yearning for the contact as if it was a counterweight that might undo the terrors he'd gone through in the previous hours, if not wipe away completely all the horror he'd withstood over the course of so many years.

Zero's heart swelled in his chest at the sight, and he found himself thinking that Kaname was indescribably precious, and that he had to protect this graceful being at any costs.

_How is it possible that you are in my arms like this? How is it possible that you trust me so much?_

"Tomorrow, everything will be different, Kaname."

He whispered the words softly by the brunet's ear, and stopped himself before he could add more. He wanted to say something like _'I promise you'_, but that thought made him want to also add immediately something along the lines of _'and this promise I intend to keep' _due to his past failure, but both of those lines sounded empty and almost as offensive as his equally strong urge to promise Kaname that he would keep him from being harmed by anyone from now on. Now that was a promise he wouldn't dare voicing, not the way things were now, so full of uncertainties and danger even after their wondrous kiss and the increased closeness they shared. If he promised such a thing and broke his word, he could never forgive himself.

Zero felt suddenly like anything he might say on the subject would sound trite or hypocritical, and glared at the wall instead, wishing he could somehow do away with the whole twisted system and make it so that no one would hurt the pureblood again. It was an impossible thing, reason told him... And yet, it was the one promise in the whole world that he most wished he could make.

Meanwhile, in his sleep, Kaname was having a beautiful dream.

He was back at the gorgeous gardens of the Kuran manor, laying on his back in the grass, but his head was pillowed on Kiryuu-sama's thigh as the man sat on the grass with him.

The best of both worlds, that of his lost memories and that of his heartbreakingly impossible yearning for his silver-haired savior – but in his dream he was so happy that nothing seemed impossible, and those two worlds were somehow united in a perfect match, the reality or possibility of which he did not question.

The grass was soft and warm under his back, and the hunter's hands gently caressed his face, tickling him gently and bringing delighted smiles to the brunet's lips. They both watched the clouds lazily unfurling on the sky above, and smiled at each other so happily that it almost hurt.

The sun didn't burn him in this world, and nothing threatened to interrupt their pleasant moment together. There was no war, no slavery, no cruel people to tear them apart or hurt him or pressure the hunter into complying with a cruel society... there was nothing bad in the entire world.  
Kiryuu-sama was bending over to kiss his lips, and Kaname sighed with such delight that he almost had trouble breathing. The world seemed so impossibly bright and happy that it brought tears of delight to his eyes.

In his mind, it all appeared composed of a patchwork of images taken from his memories, a number of them a bit off because he had spent so much time in captivity that he didn't quite remember exactly what grass felt like under one's fingers, or what the outside air even smelled like, so his mind suggested various impressions to replace what he couldn't remember.  
The sound of the wind in the trees or the way greenery would have looked like in the distant background, the scent of fresh flowers in bloom or of the leaves on the forest ground and everything around them, it was all a little bit off and unreal because after how long he'd been locked away in misery and despair, he could no longer remember what those things were like.

But in the dream Kaname didn't realize any of this, too happy to notice, his mind fooling his perceptions into making the patchwork world seem real and flawless, filled with nothing but happiness and joy.

_Maybe that's what Paradise would have felt like. Once you were finally dead and no one could hurt you anymore…_

The thought was interrupted by Zero's voice, and through the haze of his sleep, Kaname could still hear the words the man was whispering to him in reality, but they came through in an altered manner, penetrating the dream a little as if the hunter had been speaking under water. He could hear him, but things changed, the dream adding or removing bits of his sentences, even if in Kaname's sleeping mind it still all somehow made sense, and translated into making it look like it was the Kiryuu-sama in his dream who was the one speaking to him in the garden.

The words of the real Zero and the dream one mingled together as Kaname looked up at him, drinking every word in.

"_Everything will be different tomorrow, Kaname. I'll make it all better. I won't let anyone ever hurt you like this ever again."_

It wasn't clear whether the man was really speaking all those words, or whether they were a product of Kaname's wistfulness. For him, at least under the effects of sleep and of the idyllic dream, it didn't matter anymore if the promises were impossible or not. The fact Zero would make them to him at all filled him with joy and gratitude regardless of the outcome.

The pureblood wanted to reply to the man, to tearfully thank him, to make promises of his own as well, but for a moment that reminder of reality pierced through and all of a sudden the wonderful happiness of his dream-world appeared strangely impossible to him, as if it was all made of sugar and silk paper, a breath away from crumbling to pieces.

A disturbing thought crossed his hazy mind.

_If everything was fine, then why was it that the feeling of imminent doom that had been haunting him all those past days had not fully left him, even now…?_

It still lurked there, at the edge of his consciousness. In his dream, it appeared personified by a disturbing area of deep shadows swirling at the edge of the garden, cold and windy and dripping with evil, only barely hidden by the far edge of a low wall that the rose bushes climbed on.  
He hadn't noticed it there until now, but it seemed impossible to miss once he spotted it. The plants all seemed wilted in the area closest to that ominous presence, rose branches drooping down and shriveled, the grass dead and brown, soggy with moisture like rotten clippings resurfacing from under the dirty slush of melted snow.  
The spring-like happy atmosphere of the area of the garden they were in seemed to recede all of a sudden, shrinking away in fear of that ominous shroud, much like the sound of the wind in the trees and the birdsong had abruptly gone silent. The void stared at his very soul, silencing everything else.

The brunet shuddered, drawing closer to the hunter's warmth, as if afraid that the darkness might suddenly sweep closer and swallow him away.

_Why was it still here? What else could it be hinting at, if not the maelstrom of change that had nearly uprooted his life that night?_ _What other horrifying terror could possibly be about to break over his head now? _

That worrisome thought and his peaceful dream threatening to turn into a nightmare nearly unsettled the pureblood enough to awaken him, but then, the silver-haired hunter in his dream caressed his face and went on speaking, sucking away all of the brunet's ability to concentrate or think seriously.

The shadows of dread receded, chased away into the deepest confines of the garden by Kiryuu-sama's all-encompassing presence. With the sound of his voice, the sounds of nature all around them returned as well, coming back to life as the man went on speaking.

"I've invented a way to fly, Kaname. We'll soar among the clouds, and none of those people will ever be able to touch you again."

The brunet's eyebrows furrowed in surprise and he stared at the man, wondering if he'd heard him right. But Zero's seductive gaze was overwhelming, and the weirdness of his words didn't register as impossible in the world of the dream. Instead, it pleasantly distracted Kaname from the presence of that noisome presage still lurking in the background, and Zero continued, his melodious voice pulling Kaname into a trance-like wonder.

"You will see, Kaname, it will be wonderful. I have a special device called the _Bloody Rose_, which can put an end to all of your suffering at last... You'll be free to fly like a bird..."

The pureblood and the hunter laced their fingers together and Kaname looked up at the sky above, not understanding how this would be possible or what the 'device' was, but laughing happily at the thought of Kiryuu-sama holding him and them flying among the soft wispy clouds.

He clung to Zero's warmth, wistful and needy, afraid that this moment might not last, some of the desolation of reality still seeping through into the dream, making him feel cold and desperate.

_I'm so afraid of being alone…_

_I've been alone for ten whole years, although they've felt like an entire eternity instead… _

_When you're here with me, it's the only time when I actually feel alive._

_Please don't leave me alone again, please… please…_

Tears formed in the brunet's eyes and he turned to the side, burying his face against Zero's stomach, holding back the urge to sob at the thought that the hunter could leave him to face the emptiness of eternity all alone again. He would much rather die.  
But Zero's gentle voice lulled the brunet and shooed his fears away momentarily, until Kaname finally relaxed enough again and sank into an even deeper sleep, the dream and the link to reality both fading into oblivion right as Zero was telling him something about the clouds being edible and tasting like the cream puffs he had brought Kaname before, and which the pureblood so loved.

The hunter's warmth and his strong arms kept Kaname's fears and nightmares at bay, but reality was still terribly bleak and difficult.

Laying next to him on the bed, Zero held him tightly, tucking the brunet's head under his chin, kissing his hair as Kaname slept, and wishing the world was a less gruesome place.

_Let the storm come another day. Today, I'll hold you close and wish tomorrow was nothing but a nightmare. I'll wish for a world in which I could spirit you away from this __shithole__ and never let anyone else touch you ever again._

_Or if that's impossible, at least a world in which I would have the courage to actually shoot you and put an end to your suffering and slavery once and for all._

_But I don't think I ever would have that courage in this world. _

_No matter how much that might be the only way I have to save you from this horror._

_Of all impossible things to want… As a hunter, I _should_ have chosen anyone else to get attached to, and yet, I just can't help it._

_I want your gentle smile and your kind hands._

_I just can't help wanting to protect you regardless of who you are._

_Is that such an unforgivable thing...?_

.

.

.

[tbc]

* * *

**Post-chapter note****:**

_I feel compelled to mention it, since the fic touches on the subject of Kaname being unsure on how to kiss etc./feeling lost when being kissed, that this is an inevitable thing for a fic in which he is in the situation he is in in CoB, since life in the brothel made him terribly skilled at certain activities but completely lost when it comes to matters of the heart... ^^  
This kind of subject when it comes to kissing has been covered in other fics also (the best of them probably being "Blood Ink and Ecstasy" by KagamichiHime, which is an amazing fic and which you definitely should read if you haven't already!), but I wanted to clarify that Kaname's reactions etc. to kissing (and to other various things) had been planned as a plot element in CoB from the beginning (several years ago), and are not something I put in to imitate BIaE or any other fics. _

_It just happens that CoB is horribly slow and long, and so, things I had already planned to put in it also show up in other fics before they get to happen in CoB.  
But since the stories are independent and neither me nor the authors of other fics touching on such subjects took the idea(s) from one another, such things just happen to be common elements between the fics simply because they are inevitable plot elements for this kind of situation, much like bondage etc. would also be. _

_I know no one would think the idea was pilfered from anywhere, but I can't help mentioning it anyway just in case, whenever I notice that there's anything in one of my fics that's a plot element in common with other stories as well.*paranoid*_

_...And I also mention it because I just wanted any excuse to pimp the lovely "Blood Ink and Ecstasy" again, since it's such a wonderful story. XD  
Go read it if you haven't yet, it's one of the most delicious fics on the whole site! :D  
_

_And sorry for the dramatic-sounding cliffhanger with the mention of Bloody Rose during the dream, btw. XD; *couldn't resist*  
But... don't worry too much, it's like so many things in the VK manga, it's to be cliffhangery and all tragic-sounding. XD *lol*_

_And speaking of the manga, you probably noticed that a number of quotes that both Kaname and Zero use for Yuuki in the manga, or that Yuuki uses for them, show up in various places throughout CoB, in a Zero x Kaname setting instead. XD *has fun doing that*  
(Such as the mention of Zero wanting Kaname's smile and gentle hands, or Kaname's realization that he feels so strongly for Zero that it's okay even if he gets betrayed. And various other such tidbits throughout the chapters. ^^)_

_As usual for CoB, the chapter titles are all chunks of lyrics from songs from the band HIM, btw. ^^ It's one of my favorite bands, and a bit of a tradition for this fic in particular._

_Hopefully the next chapter should be updated much faster than this time around... ^^; *crosses fingers*  
I've already started writing 26, and it's already over 4,000 words long (so far, mostly of Kaname being adorably delighted over them having kissed, and cutely rolling around in bed inhaling the Zero-scented-sheets and so on XD), so hopefully it should be updated at a more decent rate if I don't get swallowed by busy RL or anything. ^^_

* * *

_**NOTE: If you are wondering why Zero and Kaname both behave slightly differently than they do in VK**__, it's because while they are still the same people, they have lived very different lives from the ones they had in the normal VK storyline, so it inevitably influenced their outlook of the world and the way they react to various things:_

_Zero still grew up among hunters__, but he wasn't present at the death of his parents, and __was never turned into a vampire__, so his hatred for the whole species never went to the extremes it has in the series. (The death of his parents was a tragedy, but the memory of the war was still somewhat recent too, Zero didn't lose everything like he had in normal VK, and as a result in the end it didn't have exactly the same effect.)  
__Imagine the sweet and gentle Zero we've seen in flashbacks with Ichiru etc, and how he might have turned out to be if he'd grown up more self-assured and without the self-loathing and anger of turning into a vampire._

_Kaname on the other hand, is of course still a pureblood and in part influenced by the way he was raised, but he has also been a slave for the past ten years, and is much too used to being beaten for no reason, so by now he knows to put up a mask of fake submission, and is a lot more careful than he was when he'd just been captured.  
On top of that, Kaname didn't go through the same things he did in the manga, so he didn't get used as much to the same type of powergames and mental struggles from the same type of more cold/calculating viewpoint. The type of abuse he's suffered after the war was a lot more direct and lacking in subtlety._

_**To give a more exact idea: **__take the innocent and trusting Kaname from the flashbacks in the manga__ (yes, that same Kaname that chairman Cross would say was so innocent and each time cutely fell for whatever story the chairman made up), __and then imagine how he might turn out__ if instead of having had to learn to manipulate people under his authority, he was captured while still innocent and gentle, and was __completely traumatized by years of slavery and constant abuse.__ (I'm going with the setting that vampires hit puberty earlier than humans, for survival reasons.)_

_Keep in mind this is AU, so a lot of the settings are different, some just a little, others a lot, so of course that inevitably affects how the characters are, even if they are still the same characters. ;D Certain details change._


End file.
